The Dames' Diatribe for WWE Vengeance 2K2

[Guest TSMAdmin]

WWE Vengeance 2002

 

Ahh... after one week of staying home on a weekend, I decided to go back up to Troy, NY, my old college stompings grounds to visit some old friends of mine staying up there for the summer. Every few months or so, I come back up here to chill, but I'm always reminded why I left in the first place. This weekend, however, hasn't been so bad, but it's just too much of a hick town for me, especially coming from NYC. Let me give you an example. I needed to get dressed and go to the store to get paper and a writing instrument for this review... lets get started.

 

We are in the Joe Louis Arena in Detroit, MI where some of the most infamous angles in WWE/F history have taken place, such as Stone Cold being run over, UT winning his first world title from Hulk Hogan in '91 and all of the river incidents involving titles, medals and people being thrown over.

 

First off, let's take you to the ending moments of Sunday Night Heat in a Bonus Match.

 

Goldust vs. Steven Richards

 

What kind of a face is Richards making in his match graphic?

 

Match Background: None

 

The Match: Richards is out first and is announced as coming from Wallingford, CT. I thought he was from Philly! I know friends in that section of CT. Goldust gets the "opening babyface superstar" pop, which is louder than usual due to his interactions with Booker T and the fact that Detriot is usually a hot crowd. Some armbars and backbody drops by GD to start but Stevie comes back with a kidney forearm shot followed by a neckbreaker. With Goldust standing in the corner, Richards attempts some sort of Bronco Buster....that really didn't make much sense. GD comes back with some clotheslines and sets up for the Curtain Call. Stevie rolls through and gets a reverse DDT. Stevie-kick attempt is blocked, but he gets it the second time and Goldust kicks out! Didn't seem like the fans cared too much for Stevie's finish...it's just not over. Goldust gets a snap powerslam for the pinfall?! I guess they just won't push Richards. After such a crowd-popping match with Tommy Dreamer on Monday, I figured the least they could do is give Richards a credible finisher.

 

My opinion: A win for Richards would have really meant something, Goldust always gets his heat back with his funny skits. Even if you're going to job Richards, do you have to job him to a powerslam? That makes him look incredibly weak, which really isn't good if you want to play up his match with Dreamer from last week. The match was about *.

 

PPV time almost, but Tazz's music plays and out comes Michael Cole and Tazz. They look kinda peeved. They confront JR & The King about the fact that they never get to call any PPV's and state that Stephanie McMahon demanded that they get some PPV air time. After they tease Tazz and King going at it (again... ugh), JR comes up with a compromise: Tazz & MC will do the 1st half of the PPV, JR & The King will do the second half. Nice touch, but this really should have taken place at Backlash when they first did the split. If I was Tazz or Michael Cole (heaven forbid), I'd bitch about having the call the lower card of the PPV, but that's just me.

 

Finally, the PPV starts and their opening montage has a religious theme to it. Pretty weak compared to packages past.

 

The pyro hits as MC & Tazz greet us to the PPV. They say to the audience that Steph demanded they do the first half of the PPV and that's why they are there. WWE, keep it straight, you JUST showed us when the two teams compromised. Now you tell us that it was Steph's intention?

 

We kick it off with:

 

Bubba Ray Dudley/Spike Dudley vs. Chris Beniot & Eddie Guerrero in a Tag Team Elimination Tables Match.

 

It's Benoit's first match on PPV since he broke his neck and you want him in a TABLES match?

 

Match Background: This started off as Eddie/Bubba as a result of Bubba's interference in his match with Ric Flair last month. After a tag match on Raw where the Dudley's got the win, Benoit put Spike through a table and double teamed Bubba.

 

The Match: Benoit takes over on Bubba to start and ends up hitting a release German suplex. He hasn't hit his rolling suplexes since he's come back. I hope it has nothing to do with Angle using it now. Eddie and Beniot take turns punishing Bubba as it appears Spike, of all people, will be the hot tag. Guerrero sets up a table at ringside, but while he's out there, Spike smacks him with a tope. Benoit temporarily takes out Spike again and sets up a table in the ring. Eddie and Benoit superplex Bubba, but Spike had already moved the table out of the way. The spot lacked any suspense because Spike moved the table prematurely. Eddie and Benoit prop a table up in the corner and Irish-whip Spike in that direction, but Bubba tackles him down to avoid Spike's elimination. Nice spot. The Duds finally are able to take over and his the Whazzup headbutt on Benoit. Bubba tells Spike to GET THE TABLES (even though there's one in the ring), but before Spike was able to go anywhere, he's put in the Crossface and taps like Hogan last month. I love it. Oh, you can't win that way? Bubba saves Spike and lays Benoit on a table in the ring. He goes for his senton and of course, Benoit moves so Bubba goes through the table himself. It wasn't an offensive move by the other team, so he's still in. Eddy remembers the table he set up at ringside earlier and tries to suplex Spike through it, but gets Acid Dropped onto it instead. It's ruled an elimination despite the fact that Spike went through it, not Eddie. Back in the ring now, Beniot takes dear old Spike and tosses him lack a sack of garbage over the top rope through a table set up on the other side of the ring. It's down to Bubba and Benoit! Benoit sets up a table and attempts a German suplex, but Bubba goes behind him and hits the Bubba Bomb through the table for the win!

 

My opinion: It started off as a formulaic tag match, but as it progressed nicely. Spike took some nasty table bumps, like always and Benoit's neck was protected. Going through the table with the Bubba Bomb was the best way to ensure that Beniot's neck didn't touch the wood. The wrong guys went over to me. The match: **1/4

 

In the back, Eric Bischoff is interviewed by Coach but in mid-interview, he sees HHH and goes to speak with him. HHH is going to speak with Steph and Eric makes his disappointment known.

 

Jamie Noble w/Nidia vs. Billy Kidman for the WWE Cruiserweight Title.

 

Will we see another WWE style Cruiserweight match, or will they finally go balls out?

 

Match Background: In a tag match two weeks ago, Billy Kidman scored a pinfall over Jamie Noble, becoming the number one contender for the CW title. Last week on SD, after Kidman defeated Tajiri, Noble came in and powerbombed Kidman, setting up tonights match.

 

The Match: Kidman's wearing his shorts instead of the nut-hugging tights, thank God. Lock-up, both guys fall out of the ring. Back in, Kidman gets the advantage and gets some near falls. On the outside, Noble uses Nidia as a shield and distracts Kidman long enough to get a single arm DDT. Noble throws him back in and throws his injured shoulder into the ring post. Northern light suplex with the bad arm hammerlocked by Noble! Damn...Kidman goes for the Rydien Bomb (Sky High) but can't lift Noble because of his hurt arm. I LOVE IT! Noble posts him shoulder first again. Awesome! He gets a rolling hammerlock takeover...wow. Kidman fights back and he is selling that arm like it is just DEAD. He sets Noble up for the SSP but before he can get it off, Noble tries to superplex him. He can't get it off and Kidman uses all of his strength to give him the Rydien Bomb as he's sitting on the turnbuckle! This is the same way Kidman beat Noble the first time! One...two...NO! Kidman sets him up for the Shooting Star Press again but this time Noble just rolls out of the way! Rollup by Noble for a close ass two count! Noble gets a Tiger Bomb for the clean pinfall!

 

My opinion: I can just imagine what would have happened if they were given more time. The crowd wasn't too into it, but they just aren't used to psychology like that. The psych was really good here as Noble was just relentless attacking Kidman's arm and Kidman sold it like his arm was just useless. It even factored into the finish as Kidman couldn't block the Tiger Bomb! This was the best cruiserweight match in WWE since they acquired all of the old WCW cruisers. ***1/2

 

Backstage, Kurt Angle is introduced to Brock Lesnar by Paul Heyman. Heyman proceeds to kiss his ass about next month before he's cut off by Kurt. Angle makes it a point to tell Brock to his face that he can take him down. Afterwards, Angle thinks Brock is full of himself. Ha.

 

William Regal vs. Jeff Hardy for the WWE European Title.

 

Will Chris Harvard help William Regal get his title back?

 

Match Background: Two weeks ago on Raw, Jeff Hardy defeated Regal for the Euro Title...and Regal cried. Last week, in a 6-man tag team elimination match, Regal hit Jeff with his Brass Knuckles after he was he was eliminated already to ensure that he was eliminated as well.

 

The match: Loud "Regal Sux" chant by the crowd. Regal takes control quickly and he drives his knee into Jeff Hardy's NECK. "I hit people very hard in soft places", Regal said on Tough Enough this season. Pray for Jeff Hardy, kids. He goes to do it again and Jeff remembers that he needs his spine and decides to move out of the way. Regal sells the leg for a bit and Jeff SLOWLY catapults Regal over the top rope. Jeff goes for his running crossbody off the guard rail, but Regal ducks and Jeff goes SPLAT. Regal throws him back in but Jeff comes back with his twisting corkscrew. Jeff goes for the Swanton bomb, but Regal puts his KNEES UP! Ouch. Regal with the half-nelson suplex for two. Backbreaker for two. STIFF kick. Jeff comes back with a lightning fast arm screw and a roll up for the pin! Regal cries afterwards.

 

My opinion: The match was too quick. They tried to fit too much into a short period of time and its a shame because it looked like Regal was about to have a good match. The ending came out of nowhere. *3/4

 

In the back, Jeff is congratulated by Ric Flair. Hogan appears and congratulates him too. Hogan talks about doing the Swanton tonight and Flair does play by play in hilarious fashion. The convo then turns to the GM situation and how it can hurt or help WWE. There really wasn't a point to that, but Flair joking on Hogan is just great.

 

John Cena vs. Chris Jericho

 

Can Jericho overcome the rookie sensation in his first PPV match?

 

Match Background: Three weeks ago on Smackdown, John Cena faced Chris Jericho one on one after almost beating Kurt Angle the week before. Jericho had to resort to putting his feet on the ropes to beat Cena. The week after, Jericho was pinned by Cena in a tag match and was incensed. Cena faced Jericho on Smackdown and Jericho got himself disqualified purposely. Vince McMahon had asked Jericho to postpone his match with Edge so Jericho received this match with Cena instead.

 

The Match: Y2J immediately tries to attack Cena with a chair but misses and gets a shot across the back before the bell rings. In the ring, Cena gets some clotheslines and a spinebuster for two. Jericho hits a stun gun to takeover. Cena bumps off a punch, YES! Do it again! YES! Small Cena comeback, but Y2J hits the Breakdown (Stroke). Instead of going for the cover, he decides to go the top. Not a wise choice by Mr. Jericho as Cena superplexes him off. Cena with a tilt a whirl slam for two. He goes for his Sting-like splash in the corner, but Jericho dropkicks him RIGHT IN THE GUTS. Cena back up and gets a belly to belly. Jericho attempts the Lionsault but that misses. He doesn't miss the Flashback (Sleeper Drop) but Cena kicks out! Jericho hits the Lionsault but doesn't go for the cover. Instead, he opts for the Walls because he wants this kid to TAP. Cena rolls him up though and scores the victory! Jericho throws a tantrum after the match.

 

My opinion: Cena really does have the tools to be a major, major star in this business. I disagree with putting Cena over the man that held the Undisputed title for four months, but at least it was made to look like Jericho's cockiness cost him the match a few times. If it had more time, I gladly would have rated it higher. **3/4

 

In the back, one of Steph's lawyer's stops by to bring some documents and Bischoff is concerned. I can smell the swerve here...that's not the contract, its the divorce papers.

 

JR & The King take over the announce position.

 

Brock Lesnar vs. Rob Van Dam for the WWE Intercontinental Title.

 

Is it the Summer of Brock Lesnar or RVD?

 

Match Background: These two met in the finals of the King of the Ring tournament last month and Brock won in three minutes, but not without almost tasting defeat. The next night, after Vince McMahon's infamous "Ruthless Agression" speech, RVD attacked Brock during his coronation. They had a rematch that night and once again, RVD came closer to beating Brock, but ended up going through a table instead. In Philadelphia two weeks ago, RVD fought back and debuted the Van Terminator on Paul Heyman. Even though Brock has the title shot at SummerSlam...he wants RVD's belt too.

 

The Match: Brock takes the title from the ref and places it on his shoulder to intimidate RVD. Brock starts the match out with a firemans carry. RVD fights out of the corner and drop toe holds Brock into the turnbuckles. Brock bails and the crowd is HOT for RVD. Brock comes back in and uses his power before RVD once again forces him to the outside. RVD with a pescado, but he's caught and gets powerslammed on the OUTSIDE. Back in, BACKBREAKER~! Gutbuster. Ow. Lesnar with an overhead belly to belly! He's expanded his moveset for tonight. RVD with a monkey flip attempt but he's heaved over Brocks head to the outside. Bear hug to RVD. So far, its the best Brock match ever. Brock rams RVD into the turnbuckles twice and applies the abdominal stretch. RVD comes back with shoulder thrusts and a kick to the chest. He does it again off the top. Rolling thunder for two! He goes for the Five-Star Frog Splash, but Brock grabs him off the top and puts him on his shoulders for the F5. Its reversed in mid-move into a DDT! RVD HITS THE FIVE STAR! Is this it! NO! Paul Heyman pulled out the ref! Referee Charles Robinson disqualifies Brock and RVD retains! Brock shoves Lil' Naitch and Robinson just starts wailing on him! Brock to Paul's rescue, but RVD knocks Brock down. Back in the ring...goes for the Van Terminator but Heyman stops him. Brock recovers and gives him a Fisherman's Buster while RVD is on the top rope! F5 on the chair and Brock is done.

 

My opinion: Brock's best match since he's debuted, without a doubt. The fans were going crazy for RVD when they thought Brock was about to be defeated, so little by little, he is getting over. RVD sure sold like a champ and Brock looked powerful. The DQ finish was necessary as they needed to protect both guys and keep the title on RVD. ***

 

In the back, Steph & Bischoff confront each other. She tells Bischoff that HHH signed the documents with a sad look on her face. When HHH exits the room, Bischoff is furious at him for signing with her, but of course, they signed their divorce papers. HHH is pissed at Bischoff for butting into his personal life, but he hasn't made his decision yet.

 

Big Show vs. Booker T

 

Will Booker finally win a PPV match?

 

Match Background: After Booker T was kicked out of the NWO, Big Show had defeated Booker T many times in tag matches. In a one on one match, Booker defeated Big Show by count out. Last week on Raw, Big Show chokeslammed Booker T through a table and demanded this match.

 

The Match: Booker starts out with kicks, but Show comes back with his power. Man, Show just takes the life out of every match he's in. On the outside, Booker tries to use a chair, but it just gets punches right back in his face. They brawl by the Spanish Announce Table. Booker smacks Show in the dome with a monitor. Booker stands on the American Announce Table while Show is stunned. He gets a running start and gives Show the Scissors kick through the SAT! Booker T Chant! He.Is.Over. Show back in now and he goes for the chokeslam. Booker fights out of it and hits the Scissors kick in the ring. He goes to the top rope....is he...nah...HARLEM HANGOVER for the win!!! JR called it the Houston Hangover by the way. Spinaroonie after the match to a huge pop!

 

My opinion: Well, its about time. For what? A few things. Booker T hasn't been on PPV since Wrestlemania, hasn't won a singles match on PPV and hasn't had a legit finisher. Did you hear those fans popping? It's all good baby. The match wasn't that great due to Show, it was about *.

 

HHH out to make his entrance...and thank God, cuz I need a break.

 

OK, I'm back. Before HHH says anything, Eric Bischoff comes out (with a brand new Titantron and shitty music) to apologize about earlier. He says that because their relationship would only be strictly business, it would be the best decision to come to Raw. Small "Asshole" chant breaks out.

 

Steph comes out...to a small pop!? She says their personal relationship could be a positive because she knows what he is capable of. Steph brings up HHH's past in WCW and how Bischoff didn't think he was worth anything. HHH finally speaks and is swaying towards Steph and Smackdown until HBK(!) comes out. Well, this just got a whole hell of a lot more interesting. LOUD DX chants. HBK rambles on for a few minutes and tells HHH that he wants him to go and hang out with him on Raw, so HHH signs with Eric. Ok....when did HBK sign with Raw? In the ring, Bischoff taunts Steph and she does something that TONS of boys in the back would love to do...slap the shit out of Eric Bischoff.

 

Rikishi (WTF is he doing on PPV?) is asked about HHH coming to Raw. Rikishi is sad...he'll miss never working or interacting with him.

 

Booker T & Goldust are interviewed about it as well and Booker says its all good as long as he doesn't decide to attack him like HBK's boys did.

 

Hogan/Edge vs. Christian/Storm for the WWE Tag Team Titles.

 

Match Background: Hogan and Edge won the tag titles a few weeks back on July 4th, the same day that Storm, Christian and Test ran down America. Because Hogan is the "Real American", a feud ensued.

 

The Match: Lance comes out and gets on THE STICK~!

 

Hogan puts his tag belt to better use by air guitaring to the ring. JR talks about how Edge went to see Hogan vs. Warrior wrestle in Toronto, but said it was at Wrestlemania 3. D'oh! Vigorous "Hogan" chants...oh shut up. USA Chant! Storm and Christian have to sell Hogan's 80's offense. I feel bad for them. Edge in and pace shoots up by 30 mph. Christian and Edge in the ring together and JR states that Edge lives in Tampa, FL now. Hey, at Wrestlemania, thats where Christian said he lived....hmm. Hogan comes in and Christian gives him a reverse DDT, yeah! He hulks up immediately, dammit. Big Boot/Legdrop Combo interrupted by Storm. Storm superkicks him in the face on the outside! Christian back in control...and Hogan is the face-in-peril?! Edge in quickly, Edge-O-Matic on Storm for two. Edge goes for the spear, but Lance leapfrogs over Edge and the ref takes it. He and Storm redo the finishing sequence from SummerSlam 2001. Test runs in and starts punking out Hogan until Rikishi makes the save. This gets Edge's attention until Chris Jericho comes in and hits Edge in the face with a tag belt!!!! Storm and Christian are the tag team champions!!!

 

My opinion: Started off slow and had a lot of interference, but it all made sense. I'm really worried about Hogan's future. He was just stuck in the midcard in a tag team, but now that they're not the champs anymore, he's going to be a singles wrestler again dammit! NO! The match was about *3/4.

 

In the back, Eric Bischoff talks to Angle about joining Raw, but he's focused on winning the Undisputed Title.

 

Marc Loyd interviews Stephanie in the back who says that she has a plan to get some Raw stars on Smackdown.

 

It is now TIME for your main event.

 

The Undertaker vs. Kurt Angle vs. The Rock for the WWE Undisputed Title

 

Who will face Brock Lesnar at SummerSlam?

 

Match Background: Rock and UT brawled at King of the Ring and that singles match was the originally scheduled title match for tonight. Then UT & Kurt Angle grappled and the match was declared a draw, so Angle was added in to make it a Triple Threat match....and a better match.

 

The Match: UT & Rock stare each other down and Angle feels ignored until he eats two punches from his respective opponents. UT & Rock brawl for a bit, but Angle irish whips UT into the stairs on the outside. Angle back in with the Rock and he hits a German Suplex. Chopfest in the corner and Angle hits two consecutive Belly 2 Belly's. Rock gets a DDT and they brawl on the outside. UT takes both down. Back in the ring, The Rock gets a chokeslam(!) on the Undertaker for two! The Rock applies the anklelock to Angle, but Angle escapes and hits a Rock Bottom on Rock for 2! UT gives Kurt the Angle Slam to conclude the No Mercy stolen special sequence for two. Rock takes care of Angle and gives UT the People's Elbow. Angle pulls Rock out and goes to pin UT(!). These guys ARE playing No Mercy. UT finally comes back with some clotheslines and punches in the corner. He posts Angle and he bleeds. Bald guys bleed better...thats a fact, baby. UT goes Old School on Angle, but Rock finally comes back. UT DDT's him for a near fall though. Rock and UT end up playing punching ping pong with Angle. The ref is bumped and Angle BLASTS UT with a chair! Angle Slam on the Rock! UT kicks out! Angle goes after Rocky, but gets put in the Sharpshooter instead. UT breaks it up and Last Ride's Rocky. Angle puts the Anklelock on UT AS HE's covering Rock! UT, however, didn't sell the leg afterwards...bastard. Angle & UT tease the Smackdown finish that resulted in a draw, but Rocky breaks it up. Angle puts Rock in the Anklelock, but its countered. As Angle's getting up, he gets chokeslammed by UT. Rock Bottom on Undertaker! Rock covers...NO! Kurt gets the Angle Slam on UT but doesn't cover. He turns his attention to the Rock, who Rock Bottoms him for the win and an unprecedented 7th WWE World Title reign.

 

My opinion: Rock & Angle make beautiful ring music together, but when you throw UT in the mix, it does slow down and turn into a brawl a bit. The match had a lot of excitement and near falls and was much better than anticipated. It's a good thing that Angle was thrown into this mix or else this match could have been a lot worse. I'll have to give it a ***3/4. Rock's next stop....Brock Lesnar.

 

Overall: A damn good ppv, especially after the mild bore that was King of the Ring. Nothing too insulting and some storylines were advanced. You know, that's all I ask for...

 

'Til Wednesday:

 

The Dames, Damian Gonzalez

 

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