Wrath comments

[Guest X briar rose X]

Well, the opening segment was odd. That's all I'll say about that.

 

Congrats go to C4 with a debut win. Nothing in particular caught my eye, so just a congrats to you.

 

Wildchild vs. Spike, holy cow. WC, I am so impressed by your descriptiveness. But then I get confused when you change tenses. Overall, very nice match.

 

Well, congrats to Janus. Being biased, I didn't look for anything good in the match, only found the bad stuff that should have counted against you to allow me to win. I know, it's evil and selfish, but you know you did a good job. You won.

 

Another odd segment where IL vs. Matt Myers should have been.

 

And then there was the main event. From the discussion in chat just minutes before the show went up, I know the match was rushed from Johnny, but I think you still did a good job in cranking something out. Pleased to see that even our World Champ is human.

 

The show was kind of bland without promos. Overall, a good read, though. Congrats to the winners, good luck with Crimson.

[Secret Agent 0]

Uhh... Thanks for the compliments Arianwyn. Unfortunatly the credit for that match is all Ejiro and Fugue, who did a bangup job of a match. Mine was ok but only 3200 words.

 

The show looks good and i'll do a more detailed comment on all the matches later.

[Guest Goodear]

And away we go...

 

C4 puts together a pretty good SWF style match with excellent (if a bit meta) commentating and actions that pops off the screen. The hitting of the finisher early in the match and then hitting it again later on is an interesting choice of match construction, as Mike still hadn't learned to duck by the end of the contest. I also think that having Mike turn his back at a pivotal moment is a bit contrived, but that's me.

 

Janus puts together a pretty good cluster brawl, but as Tom Flesher said to me, "every match should have a story." And I'm not sure if you had one in mind when you wrote this up. It also put the bulk of the action concentrated on Janus for most of the match where he just tosses the other folks around. I think it's a good strategy to, in these kinds of matches, to make sure that everyone in there gets a 'moment' where they get to look impressive. I think you tossed Jack and Arianwyn around a little too much and didn't really have them elevated to threats.

 

IL is a sick whacko... but we all knew that.

 

My match stunk. I totally lost any semblence of the arm work I had established during the Mag 7's offensive segment when Johnny made his run and the description was pretty weak. I do think writing a counter to the counter should serve Dangerous and Fugue well for their match up in a bit, I just hope they use it. But that's all I got out of it.

[Guest whatever37]

C4 puts together a pretty good SWF style match with excellent (if a bit meta) commentating and actions that pops off the screen. The hitting of the finisher early in the match and then hitting it again later on is an interesting choice of match construction, as Mike still hadn't learned to duck by the end of the contest. I also think that having Mike turn his back at a pivotal moment is a bit contrived, but that's me.

Yeah, I must apoligize for a rather lackluster match that included some redundant stuff, and some stuff that didn't make sense at all. I originally started out with a completely different outline for my match, but when I got to about the mid-point of the match that /I had planned, I realized that I only had about 500 words left. Even THEN I went 500 words over the word limit... went back, took out all of the commentary that was just for laughs [didn't help the story of the match at all] and a few extra words, and ended up with 3000 words on the dot.

 

Wildchild's match was guh-rate, with the inconsistancy in tenses being the only real flaw. Janus' match was fucking AWESOME, and after going back and reading Arianwyn's [bah, let's just call her Rose] match, I really am astounded at how good these two matches really were. I actually LIKED Rose's match a BIT better, but Janus's was great, and Rose's still had a little of that "new guy essence" [something that I'm trying to get rid of as early as possible by reading a bunch of old matches] in her match, and I suppose that that's really what took it down a notch, and gave Janus's the duke. IL, meanwhile, is clinically insane, and the ME was the usual good stuff from Fugue and Ejiro. I'd have to say that Dangerous had it much harder here, as he was having one HELL of a time trying to write a match, and still book it so that it made sense, and put everyone over.

 

Good show, not enough promos, but good show anyway. I really want to participate in a PPV, so please... people! Promo! I'm still working out an idea for mine...

[janusd 0]

Janus puts together a pretty good cluster brawl, but as Tom Flesher said to me, "every match should have a story."  And I'm not sure if you had one in mind when you wrote this up.  It also put the bulk of the action concentrated on Janus for most of the match where he just tosses the other folks around.  I think it's a good strategy to, in these kinds of matches, to make sure that everyone in there gets a 'moment' where they get to look impressive.  I think you tossed Jack and Arianwyn around a little too much and didn't really have them elevated to threats.

 

I didn't really have anything in mind. I was more along the lines of "Holy crap, how am I going to write a match with FOUR people" and just went with whatever my brain told me.

 

"I'm learning as I go"

[Guest Goodear]

Oh shoot, I skipped WildChild's match!

 

Uh, it was an ass kicking! But that's to be expected when you have the advantage like WildChild had over Spike since he couldn't use weapons or anything. I might have still had Spike using your weapons while the ref was distracted, just to make him less sympathetic (since he is the rat bastard heel and all). I think that you could have down a better job letting Spike get some heat on you in this one, WC... but it's still you're usual well written, discriptive match.

 

Hey people that haven't commented...

 

COMMENT!

 

[Guest Mr. Slim Citrus]

(Self-absorbed warning! The majority of this post is about me. You have been warned...)

 

===========================

 

"Where's the Kaboom? There was supposed to be an earth-shattering KABOOM!"

 

That was hilarious. Match was pretty well written. I really enjoyed the narrative in this match; I feel like I'm still having difficulty getting that down. Aside from that, though, it was hossamania: Good if you like that sort of thing.

 

Nothing stuck out about the brawl to me, but it was intense and dramatic, which should be the hallmark of all good brawls. I had a little bit of difficulty getting through the match, but that has more to do with my personal dislike of gimmick matches than any failure on the writer's part.

 

M7 function like an old-school heel tag team very well. I thought the match was extremely well done; the only thing I would have done to improve upon it would have been to involve the M7 in some more DASTARDLY HEEL TACTICS~!™

 

 

 

About my match: I didn't notice the tense switches; I'll have to take a closer look at what I write in the future.

 

Re: Goodear's comments: It was a squash. Spike wasn't supposed to get any licks in.

 

Remember the week after WM5 when Ultimate Warrior went on Superstars after losing the IC title to Ravishing Rick Rude and crushed (insert jobber's name here) in like 25 seconds? Or, when Mr. Perfect went on Superstars the week after losing the IC Title to the Hitman at SS '91, and beat (insert jobber's name here) in like 10 seconds? Well, that's what I was going for.

 

As I said, I seem to have a little problem expressing myself in the narrative. Basically, the sentiment I was trying to get across was that Wildchild, coming off a week of recuperation, was still infuriated over his loss in the scaffold match, and had spent the previous week festering in a pool of his own anger to the point where he saw Ejiro in the ring instead of Spike, and just set about to brutalizing him.

 

I didn't know how to express this sentiment in the narrative, and I lack the writing talent to write a match from the first person persepective... perhaps I should study some of Christian Fury's better work to get the idea; I was kind of fond of some of the stuff he did.

 

On another note, my schedule owns me. I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to write. As it is, between my military obligations and my pending divorce, I don't find myself with a lot of time for writing, and usually end up writing the bulk of my matches on the due date. Since I tend to write matches backwards in the first place, I don't know how much longer I'm going to be able to continue playing "beat the buzzer."

[Secret Agent 0]

C4, C4, C4 where have we seen you before? I think this newbie really just explodes off my screen. Good action, but like Ejiro said that spot with MVS just turning around for no good reason seemed a little off. other than that bang up job there.

 

Janus you continue to impress. I rather enjoyed this little ditty, even if you Sold yourself a tad bit to much. But hey it's your match, and you won. Once again i'll have to steal from Ejiro's comments, about making everyone have their little moment. I agree with that. No matter how small, you should give them all something half way decent. I would also have thought the others would do a bit better at trying to gang up to subdue the towering Janus... Guess not.

 

Wildchild is Wildchild. Give him the oppertunity to beat you senseless with weapons and well... He will. I always love reading your matches, as they have a bit of the descriptive element that i like to have in my own matches. I hope you don't have to go for any long periods of time. I think we all enjoy you being here, i know i do.

 

Damn you Ejiro... Coming up with a credible counter to my credible counter to the Harmony. Let's see if i can counter that. I loved the bit of Axis trying to root for Johnny saying, "Come on you've got out of it before." then watching Johnny as he once again tries to overcome what was once a finisher you did not get out of.

 

The action was well paced, and i must give my thanks for the Wildchild and Dace Night save, as you did that very well. Geeze you know what... here I don't deserve this. ::Hands Ejiro the World Title:: Just kidding, you can't have it that easy. However your already a World Champion in my opinon with this match.

 

That's all for me, I'm off to put the top on this killer match between me and Fugue!

[Guest Chuck Woolery]

Mike Van Siclen's on leave, Johnny boy.

 

Good show. After re-reading Wildchild's match a second time and knowing what was supposed to happen, it's like wine - grows better with age.