Guest TSMAdmin Report post Posted December 19, 2002 Before I start, take a look at this picture from WWE’s Survivor Series site: Ironic, ain’t it? Anyways... onto this week’s show. The show starts with, ironically, a promo for the Elimination Chamber. The pyro goes off and it’s time for yet another edition of WWE Heat. Your party hosts for his extravaganza are, as always, Jonathan Coachman and Lita. Here comes.... Goldust to start things off. Wow, what a pleasant surprise! Someone who isn’t a complete jobber! Goldie gets a pretty big pop, as per usual. Goldust’s opponent for this week is Johnny Stamboli. We’ve got two above average wrestlers here, so this one might not be so bad (but I doubt it’ll be anything memorable, either). Heat Opener (AKA: The Bottom of the Totem Pole:) Dusty’s Kid, Goldust vs. Johnny Stamboli Goldust sizes Stamboli up in a crouched position before the match starts, then taunts him, and catches him off guard with a slap to the back of the head. Stamboli wasn’t too happy about that, so he rips his pants off, and it’s GO TIME. They lock up to start, and Goldust immediately locks Stamboli into a side headlock and a Hammerlock. Stamboli tries to snapmare out, but Goldust holds onto the hammerlock. Stamboli eventually elbows out and bodyslams Goldust. He sends Goldie into the corner, but gets clotheslined. Irish whip by Goldust, followed by a hiptoss and the BUTT BUMP OF DOOM. Goldust sets Stamboli up in the corner for the Shattered Dreams, but the ref breaks it up. Stamboli military presses Goldust, and, with a great degree of difficulty, I might add, turns it into a powerslam. Stamboli follows up with a choke and some stomps. He whips Goldust into the corner hard, and Goldust goes down. Stamboli drops an elbow across the midsection for two. Stamboli whips Goldie to the other turnbuckle, knocking Goldust down for two. Stamboli locks in a rear chinlock on Goldust, but Goldust elbows out, and gets Stamboli in a backslide for two. Stamboli gets right up and hits a tilt-a-whirl backbreaker for two. Stamboli stretches Goldust by sticking his knee in Stamboli’s back, but Goldust manages to fight his way up and hits a belly to back suplex out of desperation. Goldust gets up and hits an atomic drop and two clotheslines, followed up by a DDT for two. Goldust sets Stamboli up for the Curtain Call, which Coach calls the Shattered Dreams (idiot), but Stamboli slips out. Stamboli goes off the ropes, but Goldust catches him with a powerslam for two. Stamboli hits a jawbraeker out of nowhere, and sets up for the Foregetaboutit, but Goldust sneaks out and hits the Curtain Call for the win (which Coach AGAIN calls the Shattered Dreams). Not bad. *1/2 D’Lo Brown vs. Spike Dudley (AAGH!) Is the main event. BUT WAIT! Next is Raven’s BIG ANNOUNCEMENT! OH MY GOD, Lita just screamed “MASTERPIECE!” in a high, annoying voice! Somebody, get her off the mic NOW. Some people just shouldn’t talk... EVER. Ultra long MTV Commercial Break time! Desire Video: Chris Jericho: King of the World I don’t care for Saliva, but this video was pretty sweet. It didn’t really seem to have the “Desire” touch to it though, it was more like a big music video, rather than something that showed what Jericho has sacrificed for the business. Actually, now that I think about it, I guess an arrogant music video fits his gimmick rather well. Here comes Raven, to make his BIG ANNOUNCEMENT, to reveal his MASTERPIECE. This JUST MIGHT be interesting. Raven grabs THE STICK and tells the crowd to shut up. He uses lots of big words, which probably went over the crowd’s head entirely. He says people have been looking at him like he’s a freak for all these years. Raven says he sees a festering mass of hypocrisy in the crowd. Raven promises to open our eyes, and bring salvation to us all. Well, that was a decent promo, but it sure as hell was over hyped. I suppose it helped get Raven over more as a heel though. Big Show vs. Brock promo is shown (Which will easily be a match of the year candidate *rolls eyes*). More commercials follow. Big Poppa Pump promo is shown. PLEASE GOD, LET HIM GO TO RAW! I BEG YOU!!!! Tough Enough III Recap: As always, check out Patrick Spoon’s take on this week’s show for an in depth look at Tough Enough III. D’Lo vs. Spike is shilled again, followed by more commercials. Here comes Steven Richards. His opponent is... Aaron Stevens, a jobber. Match Two: Battle of the Stevens: WHACKO Steven Richards vs. Aaron Stevens Stevens looks really young, and he’s sporting purple tights and long brown hair. They lock up to start, with Richards backing Stevens into the corner. Richards shows Stevens who’s boss with a slap across the face, followed by some brawling. Stevens reverses Richards’ whip, and hits a hiptoss and a body slam. Stevens gets revenge with a slap across Richards’ face. Stevens seems to have sort of an arrogant gimmick, which is backed up by a man with oodles of wrestling knowledge, a TRUE GENIUS in our sport, Jonathan Coachman. Okay, enough sarcasm, and back to the match... Stevens locks a standing armbar on Richards. Richards whips Stevens off the ropes, but Stevens slides under Richards and hits a nice dropkick for two. Stevens goes right back to the arm with a hammerlock, but Richards backs Stevens into the corner and punches out of it. Stevens tosses Richards into the corner and gets in a few shots of his own. Richards gets whipped into the corner, but manages to hit Stevens with a boot to the face. Richards goes to work with some stomps and some knees to the back in the corner, followed by a stiff chop, and a hard whip into the corner. Richards stomps the hell out of Stevens, and hits a snapmare into a full nelson. Stevens elbows out, and misses an elbow drop . Richards tries for a hiptoss, but Stevens spins out of it and hits a neckbreaker. That was a sweet little reversal. Time for the ten count. Richards gets up at 2, but Stevens takes advantage with some lefts and rights, and a few clotheslines. Stevens hits a spinning back elbow on Richards, followed by a swinging neckbreaker a la Shannon Moore for two. Richards lays in the corner to rest, but Stevens goes for the ten punches of doom. Richards breaks it, but gets hit with a spinning heel kick. Stevens gets whipped into the corner, but he leapfrogs over a charging Steven Richards, and tries for a springboard crossbody, but nobody’s home. Richards hits the Stevie T (an X-Factor like maneuver, but with a double underhook) for the win. Not bad at all. *3/4 Lugz Rewind: The Rewind this week is Victoria beating the hell out of Trish Stratus on RAW. Monday Night HHH Recap: HHH and Chris Jericho vs. Booker T and Rob Van Dam For a better look at this match and the rest of RAW, check out RAW from JHawks’s Beak. They shill Shawn Michaels as being at RAW tonight, and Booker T vs. Triple H as the main event. They shill the Elimination Chamber again. D’Lo vs. Spike Dudley is next. You can cut the anticipation with a knife... JVC Tower of Power: The Tower of Power this week is Batista squashing Justin Credible. Batista’s re-debut was nothing special, as he did nothing that Brock Lesnar (or any other big power wrestler) can’t do. Here comes quite possibly the most irritating wrestler in WWE today, Spike Dudley. Spike gets a big pop, which worries me. His opponent, as previously announced, is D’Lo Brown, who gets his usual huge pop. Main Event: D’Lo Brown vs. Spike Dudley Oh my god, Coach is doing an impression of an old British Woman, who is attempting to interpret Raven’s promo. Get this man off TV, NOW. D’Lo seems to be acting more cocky and arrogant in this match than normal, as he’s facing the tiny Spike Dudley. Spike gets D’Lo in a waistlock to begin, and D’Lo reverses it into a waistlock of his own. Spike reverses it again... and D’Lo reverses it again, but Spike gets D’Lo in a side headlock. D’Lo picks Spike right up and sets him on the top rope, and backs away, mocking Spike’s height. Hmm, I wonder why D’Lo is acting so heelish here. Coach comments on the D’Lo Nation, and proceeds to bark like a dog. SHUT THIS MAN UP! PLEASE! Spike locks D’Lo in a side headlock again, but D’Lo elbows out and hits a shoulderblock. D’Lo comes off the ropes, but gets hit with a hiptoss from Spike. D’Lo and Spike shake hands, and they tie-up again. D’Lo gets Spike in a side headlock, and then a hammerlock, but Spike armdrags out, right into an armbar. D’Lo tries to bodyslam out of it, but Spike holds onto the armbar. D’Lo elbows out , and flapjacks Spike hard to the mat. Nice little armbar sequence there. D’Lo yells for Spike to get up. Gah, they better not be turning D’Lo heel. D’Lo stomps away on Spike, and hits some kidney shots, and shoves Spike to the outside. D’Lo drops Spike onto the ring barrier, and throws him back in the ring. Body slam by D’Lo, and it’s time for the... yup, you guessed it... SHAKY SHAKY LEGDROP. No cover, D’Lo wants to dish out more punishment. Spike hits a flying head scissors, and does his annoying “I’M SMALL SO I’M GONNA JOG IN PLACE ON MY OPPONENT’S CHEST” move, which pisses me off. Spike beats his chest like the Ultimate Warrior, which also grates on my nerves. D’Lo whips Spike face first to the turnbuckle which knocks him on his ass. Backbreaker by D’Lo for two, followed by a bearhug that goes on for hours (well, doesn’t every bearhug seemingly go on for hours?). Spike slaps out and hits a battering ram. Spike goes for another battering ram which barely knocks D’Lo down. D’Lo catches Spike in the Side Effect! D’Lo isn’t covering, he wants to deliver more punishment. Shit, he really better not be turning heel. D’Lo whips Spike to the ropes, and tries for a Sky High, but Spike turns it into a Sunset flip. Cover. 1...2...3. GAH GAH GAH! I can’t believe D’Lo just lost to Spike Dudley! I’m sorry, I get pissed when Spike Dudley beats anyone... especially someone with loads of potential like D’Lo Brown. Uh oh, D’Lo looks pissed off and is going to kick the shit out of Spike. He grabs Spike by his hair... and gives him a sweaty man hug. Awwww. *3/4 Bottom Line: Horrible commentary, mediocre wrestling, and D'Lo Brown loses to Spike Dudley. All in all, another typical episode of WWE Heat. Peter "FakeRazor" Ramoncolor> As always, you can reach me here. whacked Out wrestling Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
