Wrestlemania VIII

[Guest bob_barron]

Just a note- I did this rant a loooooong time ago and sort of touched it up but it may suck.

 

WRESTLEMANIA VIII

 

Live from Indianapolis. Your hosts are Gorilla Monsoon and Bobby Heenan

 

Reba McEntire sings the national  anthem. Brain calls her Areba

 

"El Matador" Tito Santana v. HBK (w/Sensational Sherri)

 

THE STORYLINE-HBK has just turned on Marty and his singles push is starting. Tito is a JTTS. They both eliminated each other at RR 92.

 

THE MATCH-Where is Tito from? Sherri sings Sexy Boy. HBK sings it better. Heenan says HBK will be I-C champ soon. HBK stalls and we get a shoving match. Tito controls and gets a cross body for two. More shoving. Tito with headlock. Gorilla hypes WM hotline. HBK does a punch, a headlock and Tito clotheslines him out. Sherri consoles him. Tito pulls him into the ring and does a headlock. HBK punches him, 2 Irish whips later and Tito controls and does a headlock. This woman keeps shouting for Tito and against HBK. HBK counters with an atomic drop and controls. Tito comes back with THE TITO SANTANA HEADLOCK OF IRRMEASAREABLE PAIN! Small package gets 2 and it’s TTSHIP. HBK throws him over the top and gets a back breaker. It gets 2, so HBK does a chinlock. Boring! Tito elbows him but HBK hits the super kick. Sherri shouts for a pin. He doesn’t so Tito comes back with punches and HBK kicks him in the face. Tito comes back with the flying forearm. They brawl on the outside and Tito hits him with the flying burrito. Tito does a knee lift and an inverted atomic drop. He hits him with some Spanish move and HBK goes out. Tito pulls him in and does a scoop slam but HBK holds onto the rope and falls on him for the pin. Really boring. *1/2 Even though Tita Santana has a really shitty Wrestlemania record- he only lost one match clean and this is it. 2-4 he wasn’t even pinned, 5 caused his partner bailed on him, 6-manager interference and 7- he was tazed.

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Tito is retired HBK is in the WWF but retired.

 

Mean Gene brings out the LOD with their old manager Paul Ellering. Ellering talks about bringing the LOD together and according to Animal-Jimmy Hart sucks. Crowd chants LOD and Ellering claims how great they are.

 

Sean Mooney talks to Jake Roberts who isn’t drunk. They show Jake giving Paul Bearer the DDT. Lord Alfred Hayes talks to Paul Bearer and Undertaker. This is an exclusive segment. Good interviews.

 

Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs. The Undertaker (w/Paul Bearer)

 

THE STORYLINE-Jake and the Undertaker had both in heels working together and causing havoc for Randy Savage. Then Jake turned on Undertaker. It should be noted hat Jake’s contract is up.

 

THE MATCH-Jake gets great heel heat. Undertaker gets a huge pop and Jake looks scared. Undertaker no sells all. Jake keeps punching him and clotheslines him outside. Undertaker kicks his ass outside. Jake keeps punching, more no-sell. Undertaker gets whipped into the corner and Jake punches. Undertaker blocks Irish whip and Iris whips him. Undertaker chokes him. Another Irish whip, more choking, Irish whip, more chokes. Undertaker does an elbow and flying bodypress. Jake reverses a piledriver and gets the DDT. Undertaker sits up and chokes him. Jake does a clothesline, sit up. 2nd DDT by Jake, but he goes to attack Bearer. Undertaker sits up, tombstones him outside for the 3. Good blow off match and it made UT even bigger. *- match wasn’t great but its fun to watch

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Jake is at a bar. UT is demanding respect

 

Mean Gene interviews Piper and Hart. Piper talks about Bret’s childhood. Very funny. Bret acts like a heel. Great stuff

 

"Rowdy" Roddy Piper vs. Bret "Hitman" Hart for the WWF Intercontinental Title

 

THE STORYLINE-In Canada, Bret was sick and forced to job the title to The Mountie. Piper then kicked his ass at RR 92 for his 1st title. This is Bret’s 1st rematch.

 

THE MATCH-Piper looks intense. Staredown to start. There is a guy in the crowd with a 4 Horseman sign. They lock up and Piper does an arm drag. They lock up and Hart does an arm drag. They lock up again and Piper does a single leg takedown. Hart flips to the outside. They go back in and they do a shoving match and Piper wins a test of strength. Hart reverses and holds onto his arms. Piper slaps him. Piper throws him into the ropes but Hart keeps holding onto his arm and does a hammerlock. Piper does an Irish whip, and Hart drop kicks him but hurts his shoulder. Bret gets two on a small package. Piper slaps him, Hart shoves him and they get into a war of words and Bret does a headlock. They go over the top but Piper gets in 1st. Heenan says they should ring the bell. Huh. Piper holds the ropes for Bret to get in. While Bret ties his boots, Piper cheap shots him and Bret blades. Piper gets two on a bulldog and bites him. He does an Irish whip and does a knee-lift. That gets two and he punches him. Bret counters with a sunset flip for two. Piper does some Road Dogg punches for two. They do a punch war and a slap war. Great moment. Bret forearms him to the outside. A double clothesline results and Piper gets up first and goes to the top. Hitman recovers and rams his head down. 5 MOVES OF DOOM! Piper blocks the sharpshooter, Bret goes to the middle rope but Piper blocks elbow drop. They do a punch trade and Hart headbutts him. Ref bump. Bret clotheslines him out and rams him into the steel steps. Piper gets a hold of the ring bell and teases turning heel but the crowd convinces him not to. Piper gets the sleeper, Bret runs him into the ropes, catapults himself off and bridges him. New champ, Excellent match. Piper gives him the belt and they embrace. ****1/2

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-XWF, WWA. Both retired

 

Heenan interviews WBF member Lex Luger. Luger insults Monsoon and mentions Gary Strider, Eddie Robinson. Boring.

 

Nasties, Repo and Mountie cut a promo. Duggan, Bossman, Virgil and Slaughter respond. Virgil has a facemask from Sid.

 

Ray Combs does ring announcing and says the eight man tag has the greatest wrestlers and tells bad jokes, almost gets his ass kicked and shoots himself.

 

Virgil, "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan, The BigBossMan and Sgt. Slaughter vs. The Nasty Boys, The Mountie and Repo Man (w/Jimmy Hart)

 

THE STORYLINE-Bossman and Mountie had issues, I think Virgil and Repo do to. Virgil is wearing a mask do to Sid.

 

THE MATCH-Two of these people went on to Team Canada and all of these people were in NWA/WCW. Shawn Michaels has left the building. Sags and Duggan start. Stall. Duggan turns his back and Gorilla says he’s had one too many hos. Duggan beats on Sags and tags former WWF champion Sgt. Slaughter. Knobbs is tagged and works over Slaughter. Slaughter comes back with a clothesline and elbows him. Bossman comes in and beats on him more. Repo tags in who takes control. Bossman misses a splash but comes back with a low blow. Virgil comes in, gets a two count and Sags breaks it up. Mountie and Duggan come in and the heels beat on Duggan. Virgil plays Ricky Morton. Mountie comes and Bossman cheats by running into the ring and catching Mountie as he comes off the top. Pier 8 follows and Sags accidentally nails Knobs and Virgil gets the pin. Awful match. ¼*

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Virgil works indies, Hacksaw is in XWF. Bossman is in WWF and Sgt. Slaughter is retired but still in the WWF. Nastys are in XWF, Mountie is wrestling in Canada and Repo works indies

 

Sean Mooney interviews Perfect and Flair. Great Interview. They plan to unveil a picture of Liz. Woooooooo!  Mean Gene stands by Macho’s locker. He won’t talk.

 

"The Nature Boy" Ric Flair (w/his executive consultant Mr. Perfect) vs. "The Macho Man" Randy Savage for the WWF title

 

THE STORYLINE-Flair won the World Title at RR and began pissing Savage off by claiming he knew and had a relationship with Liz first. Savage got so pissed that they had this match for WM. If Flair wins, we will see provocative pics he took of Liz.

 

THE MATCH-  Flair enters first probably saying Fuck you WCW on his way to the ring. We cut backstage as Lord Alfred Hayes makes it into Savage’s locker room for a Coliseum Video exclusive. Savage chases him out and upon his entrance gets a huge pop. They start out and Savage kicks his ass, but Mr. Perfect breaks it up and beats him up. Savage chases him, runs into the ring and Savage does a clotheslines Flair. He knees him into the ropes and does the 10 count punch. Savage does a clothesline and an elbow gets two. Flair chucks him over the top and chops him. Woooooo! Flair now kicks his ass. Flair kicks his ass and does a standing suplex for two. Another suplex for two. Chop. Wooooooo! Flair does two Irish whips, and more chops with a knee drop on the side. Heenan is doing awesome commentary. They go outside with more Flair ass kicking. Heenan does the best Woos. Flair does a suplex for two and does an Irish whip and punches him. He kicks him around and does more chops but Savage is coming back with right hands. Savage gets a neck-breaker and more punches. Flair eye gouges him. He goes to the top, but as in every match gets thrown off. Flair then begs for mercy. Savage back drops him and does two clotheslines. Flair begs for mercy and does a Flair flop. Flair is a great dickish heel and totally earns the title "Dirtiest Player in the Game". Flair comes back with a clothesline and they go outside. Savage rams him into the post and Flair blades. Another thing I like about this match is that you don’t Vince out there screwing up on commentary, you have a great heel biased commentator and a good all faces commentator who doesn’t go overboard like Vince. Back to the match. Heenan starts crying. Savage does a suplex on the outsides and punches him. Savage does the double axehandle and a bodyslam. He goes up and hits the big elbow. BUT WAIT!!! Mr. Perfect, in one the most dickish heelish fuckheaded moves of all times, pulls Savage off at two. The crowd is pissed. I’m a huge Henning mark but I was even pissed. Savage goes after Perfect and we have a ref bump. Perfect throws Flair some brass knuckles, and Savage gets nailed. In a cute spot just as the ref wakes up, Flair quickly flips them to Perfect. Flair only gets two. Mr. Perfect whacks Savage with a chair. Here comes Liz. The Usual Suspects and Shane McMahon try to get her to go back. Flair works Savage as they keep trying to get Liz to go to the back. Flair gets some twos with the figure four as Perfect holds Flair’s arms for leverage. Flair gets some two counts and slaps Savage. Savage tries to turn it over but Perfect and Flair cheat some more. FLAIR AND HENNIG ARE GOD! Flair tries to bodyslam him but it gets reversed into a small package. Flair does some kicks and chops. And dedicates them to Liz. Wooooooo! Flair does an atomic drop but as Flair Wooos, Savage rolls him up with the tights for the three. Savage and Liz embrace and Heenan comes out to console Flair. Flair kisses Liz and she slaps him. Savage dives after him for more ass kicking. As the officials try to pull them apart, Flair lays in some ass-kicking and Perfect joins in. Crowd chants for Hogan. Ass-holes. Flair and Perfect leave as Savage tries to go for him but refs stop him. Liz and Savage celebrate and fireworks go off. A ***** match.

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-50% owner of WWF, holding up WWA for 5 mil

 

Sean Mooney interviews Flair and Perfect. They bitch about Savage cheating with the tights. Flair wants a rematch and Perfect keeps bitching about the tight pulling and they show a replay. It should be noted that these guys cheated like 18 times in his match.

Mean Gene interviews Savage who doesn’t care about the tights. Two great interviews.

 

We see a benefit for some hospital. Nasties and Mountie sing. A guy who likes Paul Bearer and a guy who look like Bossman win a look-alike contest. Hulk Hogan does an interview at some dinner and mentions a film called Rough Stuff. If you know anything about this film, We also see the WM brunch with Owen,  Bulldog, Hacksaw, Slaughter, Jake and Martel.

 

Savage and Liz in the locker room. Savage challenges Flair.

 

"The Model" Rick Martel vs. Tatanka

 

THE STORYLINE-These guys have fought each other a lot during their WWF tenure.

 

THE MATCH- How come Savage-Flair was middle of the card. Eeeeeeeeeeeee brings Tatanka. Tatanka didn’t lose until 93 though a friend claims he lost by COTR at a house show, Some Indians dance outside the ring. WTF? Tatanka works Martel over and they go outside. Tatanka does a war dance. Martel takes control and Tatanka comes back but Martel chokes him. Martel throws him outside and works him over. Heenan is really funny. Martel stalls too much and falls off the top. Tatanka chops him. Martel comes back with a clothesline but Tatanka gets a cross body for three. Eh- * Tatanka does a war dance.

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Martel is retired, Tatanka works occasionally.

Sean Mooney talks to Money Inc. Pay your taxes damn it! Gene is with Quake and Typhoon who shout

 

Money Inc w/Jimmy Hart vs. Natural Disasters in a WWF Tag Titles

 

THE STORYLINE-Jimmy Hart turned on ND.

 

THE MATCH-Natural Disasters kick some ass, Money Inc. run for the CO. DUD

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Dibase is a retired Christian, all the rest work Indies.

 

Mean Gene is with Brutus Beefcake. Beefcake talks about how he likes Hogan orally. Gene agrees.

 

Owen Hart  vs. Skinner

 

STORYLINE-Owen needs to be over.

 

THE MATCH-Owen has funny pants and Skinner cheap shots him before the bell. Skinner works him over and gets two on a slop drop. Owen saves himself from going over the top, runs in and rolls Skinner up. Too short. ½*

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Owen is dead. Skinner works indies.

 

Mean Gene is with Sid. Sid calls Gene a fat bald headed oaf. Sid is master and Hogan is learner. He promises to make this Hogan’s last match. We cut to-

Vince with Hogan. Hogan hints it will be his last match and Vince thanks him for the memories. We cut back to-

Sid who doesn’t care about Hulk and says he will end Hulkamania. Didn’t King Kong Bundy, Paul Orndorff, Flair, UT, Savage, Quake, Andre, Slaughter, the DOD, Vader and Luger say that?

 

Sid Justice w/Harvey Wippleman vs. Hulk Hogan

 

THE STORYLINE-Sid eliminated Hogan at the RR and Hogan is pissed and causes Sid to lose. WWF was running out of ideas.

 

THE MATCH-Hogan comes out with Real American. Isn’t it sad that Brisco and Mideon used that music? I think they used canned noise. Sid attacks Hogan before the bell but Jesus punches him twice and Sid goes outside. The music is playing while this is going on. Hogan rips off his shirt and tells Sid to come back in. Sid beats on him and touches his face which Hogan sells. Sid kicks him. His Hulkamania over? Hogan punches him twice and they go outside. Crowd chants Hogan. In the ring Hogan talks to God before deciding whether to do test of strength. This reminds me of the Simpsons episode "Viva Ned Flanders". Sid wins TOS but fans cause Hogan to come back. Sid counters and Hogan begs for mercy. Only heels should beg for mercy, i.e. Flair. Sid is barely holding on. Fans cause Hogan to attempt a comeback but Sid knees him. Wippleman distracts Hogan and Sid chokeslams him. Since Sid is an idiot he just talks to the camera. Is Hulkamania over? Sid kicks and punches him. They go outside and Sid hits him with THE DOCTOR BAG OF DOOM and then THE NERVE PINCH OF DOOM. Hogan can’t sell that and rests his head on his leg. Sid screams. They do the arm lift thing and Hogan hulks up. He does some elbows but Sid does a side suplex. Sid calls for powerbomb which gets two. Hogan is hulking up, no selling all. He throws Sid into the turnbuckle. God bless Hulkamania. Big boot, bodyslam and leg drop. Since Papa Shango fucked up Sid has to kick out and Harvey Wippleman causes a DQ. Hogan beats him up but Shango comes and they double team Hulk. Is Hulkamania over? HOLY MOTHER FUCKING SHIT! The Ultimate Warrior comes back. Huge pop. Sid hits him with a chair but Warrior hulks up and crows goes crazy. Match sucked-  ¾*

 

WHERE ARE THEY NOW-Sid is injured. Hulk is in WWF.

 

Disclaimer at the end-Due to circumstances beyond on our control the DBS-Berzerker match didn’t take place. We apologize for any inconvenience. Thanks

 

Bottom Line-Great WM. A ***** match, an excellent Bret-Piper match, the biggest WM surprise and a good Jake-UT blow off. Everything that sucks is short, and the good is GOOD. Recommended

[Guest Kahran Ramsus]

"THE MATCH-Natural Disasters kick some ass, Money Inc. run for the CO. DUD"

 

I see someone got himself acquainted with the fast-forward button.  Can't say I blame you.

[Guest bob_barron]

Yea- I dont FF anymore. I think thats just a stupid ending.

[Guest nWoScorpion]

Pipers WM 8 loss was his first, ys his first pinfall loss ever in the WWF according to my sources.  cant believe it eh? Every match hes ever losrt was by DQ or count out.

[Guest DEEP THOUGHT]

Look for the Coliseum Video "Best of the WWF vol. 3". Piper jobs cleanly by pinfall to Jimmy Snuka in the first match. I believe that Piper was also pinned by Ric Flair in a dark match at "This Tuesday in Texas". I'm sure that there are many more instances that Piper jobbed in the WWF, especially back when he was a heel.

[Guest Kahran Ramsus]

"Pipers WM 8 loss was his first, ys his first pinfall loss ever in the WWF according to my sources.  cant believe it eh? Every match hes ever losrt was by DQ or count out. "

 

Come to think of it.  I do believe that this is true.

[Guest krambigmac]

Piper's WM 8 loss was his first pinfall loss on TV.  The Best of WWF vol 3 Snuka match was a dark match and if the Flair match at TTIT happened, that was a dark one as well.

[Guest bob_barron]

Piper also lost to Bruno on the Col Video- Inside the Steel Cage