The 2003 Smark Royal Rumble Sign-Up Thread

[Guest DawnBTVS]

*Nails Corey with a dumbell and delivers a Superplex onto a bed of nails placed on 2 stacked tables set up above a pirahna tank*

[Guest Mattdotcom]

**shows a video clip of Mattdotcom having sexual relations with Bea Arthur**

 

She was mine before she was Robert Alan Aurthur's! WHEE!

[Guest CoreyLazarus416]

**farts in the piranha tank, thus killing them all instantly, and then gets out of the tank and delivers the SUPER-DUPER-DOUBLE-LOOPER DDT OF EXTREME NON-COMFORTABLENESSITY~! to Dawn**

[Guest Sandman9000]

::Sandwichs Dawn between two beds of nails, hits a Mondo Sledge, crushing Dawn::

[Guest Sandman9000]

::Hits self in nuts with a rubber chicken to get the thread movin again::

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

:: Godsmacks Sandman because Messiah is the only talent to come out of XPW ::

[Guest CoreyLazarus416]

**delivers the Welfare Check to Spike onto a spiderweb of barbed wire, thumbtacks, glass tubes, and small explosives**

 

FRIED CHICKEN, ASS KICKIN'

[ChrisMWaters 0]

Hmm...going by the tale of the tape this past Smackdown, I think we should do one for the SmartMark Royal Rumble.

 

I'll start:

 

Name: ChrisMWaters

Age: 20

Height: 5'10

Weight: 225 lbs

Hair: None

Eyes: Green

Accomplishments: Varsity High School Wrestler

11-1 Record in wrestling for Senior year

Finisher: Watersfall (Diamond Dust(

Strategy: When thrown over top rope, if happens, do NOT let other foot touch. Slide between ropes at all times possible.

[Guest Sandman9000]

Might as well. Copied my OAOAST stats.

 

Name: Sandman9000

Age: 19

Height: 6'1"

Weight: 220

Hometown: South of Heaven

Alignment (heel, face, tweener): heel, Team Ultraviolence, we get cheered because we hurt people.

Wrestling style (brawler, cruiserweight, technical, all-rounder, etc.): brawler, some high flying, just swings shit.

Theme music: I Will Be Heard- Hatebreed

Entrance attire (sunglasses, robe, jacket, etc): Two bandanas, one covering the top of his head, the other around the mouth and nose, so only the eyes are exposed.

Ring attire: Sleeveless CHOOSE DEATH T-shirt (a la Necro Butcher), jean shorts, boots.

Finishing Move(s) (try to keep it to 1 or 2): PSYCHO DRIVAH~! (Torture rack into piledriver)

H8 Lock (Texas Cloverleaf, done with pressue on face/Liontamer style)

Signature Moves (ex: Shining Wizard, Rolling Germans, etc.): Yakuza Kick (Running Big Boot, Masahiro Chono/Trent Acid Style)

Edgecrusher (Brainbuster)

Messiah Bomb (Crucifix Powerbomb)

Springboard 450 to outside

Corkscrew Moonsault

No-Hands Somersault Senton to the outside.

Godsmack (Fireman's Carry into Stunner)

Boot scrapes with opponent seated in the corner, usually followed up with some running boot scrapes.

Limited technical and submission moves, mostly punching, kicking, and brawling with weapons, but will do high-flying stuff, just not on a real lucha level.

Basic moveset: Punch

Kick

Swing weapon

Take insane bump

Strategy for the Rumble: Beat the shit out of everyone else with whatever I can find, cause pain and suffering with fellow Team Ultraviolence members. I know I don't care if I win, I just wanna hurt people. I'm sure Corey and YNA feel the same way.

[ChrisMWaters 0]

Oh yeah...two things that I forgot.

 

Theme: "Superstar" by Saliva

 

Ring Attire: T-Shirt (For this, probably my "Hulk Still Rules One) and black swishy pants, with sneakers.

[Guest Sandman9000]

And the giant scar on your head.

 

"What giant scar?"

 

::Sandman cuts Chris open with a pair of new scissors::

[ChrisMWaters 0]

And the giant scar on your head.

 

"What giant scar?"

 

::Sandman cuts Chris open with a pair of new scissors::

*watches as his "Hulk Still Rules" Bandana is shred*

 

....good thing I was wearing that. *puts on another.*

[Guest CoreyLazarus416]

Actually, the Tales Of The Tape bio would be good for Slickster to add to the Official Site.

 

Name: CoreyLazarus416

Age: 16

Height: 5'11"

Weight: 205

Hometown: Franklin, MA

Alignment (heel, face, tweener): heel, Team Ultraviolence, we get cheered because we hurt people

Wrestling style (brawler, cruiserweight, technical, all-rounder, etc.): all-arounder, prefers brawling

Theme music: Shadows Fall - "The First Noble Truth"

Entrance attire (sunglasses, robe, jacket, etc): Black leather biker jacket, black baseball cap with "INSANE" written across front in white

Ring attire: Black SLAYER South Of Heaven tee, single black leather glove with index and pinky fingers cut off on right hand, black jeans, knee-length wallet-chain, black combat boots, single white bandana around right knee

Finishing Move(s) (try to keep it to 1 or 2):

Director's Cut (double-cradle piledriver)

Sunset Driver (inverted Emerald Frosion)

Signature Moves (ex: Shining Wizard, Rolling Germans, etc.): Mercury Bomb (Torture Rack into a powerbomb)

DDT variations

Welfare Check (inverted crucifix position swung into a DDT) {usually done onto weapon of some sort}

Basic moveset: Punch

Kick

Clothesline

Headlock (so I can grind something sharp into somebody's face)

Swing weapon

Take insane bump

Strategy for the Rumble: Beat the shit out of everyone else with whatever I can find, cause pain and suffering with fellow Team Ultraviolence members. I know I don't care if I win, I just wanna hurt people. Oh yeah: AND ANGLESAULT CANNOT WIN.

[Guest CoreyLazarus416]

**digs Mr. Pogo's sickles into Chris' lower back and then punches him 7 times, no more no less, in the back of the head with brass knucks that have thumbtacks, pointy-side OUT, on the end of them**

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

:: pronounces Chris M Waters dead at Board Time 8:15 AM at the age of 11 ::

[ChrisMWaters 0]

:: pronounces Chris M Waters dead at Board Time 8:15 AM at the age of 11 ::

I'm 20 years old, thank you very much.

 

And I won't die. Bloodied maybe, but I'll be victorious bloody.

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

:: pronounces Chris M Waters dead at Board Time 8:15 AM at the age of 11 ::

I'm 20 years old, thank you very much.

 

And I won't die. Bloodied maybe, but I'll be victorious bloody.

You sure will....

 

 

uhhh

 

 

Im rooting for you *cough*

[ChrisMWaters 0]

:: pronounces Chris M Waters dead at Board Time 8:15 AM at the age of 11 ::

I'm 20 years old, thank you very much.

 

And I won't die. Bloodied maybe, but I'll be victorious bloody.

You sure will....

 

 

uhhh

 

 

Im rooting for you *cough*

Hehehehehehehehehe.

 

I've got a great number. IT's had great success in Royal Rumbles of the past.

 

One year it won.

[Guest Choken One]

Choken One Mindlessly wanders into BattleZone...Looks around and picks up bloodied ChrisMWaters and Takes off his clothes and sets them on one of CoreyLazarus416 many bonfires around the ring. CMW wakes up and see that his burnt Manhood is exposed and Screams in Embrassment and slings himself over the ropes and rans backstage. Meanwhile Choken one and Corey stare down...C1 nods his head, Leans on the ropes and Corey painfully pokes C1's chest for the elimination.

[ChrisMWaters 0]

Thanks for telling us your sexual fantasies, Choken One. ^_-

[Guest Choken One]

Twas my plan, To Goldust the Rumble.

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

:: hits Molly Holly with a car (GOD WHY DID I DO SUCH A THING?), forcing Chris Waters to leave the rumble, to go stalk Molly in the hospital. ::

[ChrisMWaters 0]

:: hits Molly Holly with a car (GOD WHY DID I DO SUCH A THING?), forcing Chris Waters to leave the rumble, to go stalk Molly in the hospital. ::

Kinda hard to do that when she's right here, sitting on my lap. >=)

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

:: hits Molly Holly with a car (GOD WHY DID I DO SUCH A THING?), forcing Chris Waters to leave the rumble, to go stalk Molly in the hospital. ::

Kinda hard to do that when she's right here, sitting on my lap. >=)

Ok, I'll put it in better terms...

 

 

:: hits the REAL Molly Holly with a car, Not the blow up doll in Chris' lap, forcing Chris out of the rumble, to go stalk Molly outside the hospital ::

[ChrisMWaters 0]

:: hits Molly Holly with a car (GOD WHY DID I DO SUCH A THING?), forcing Chris Waters to leave the rumble, to go stalk Molly in the hospital. ::

Kinda hard to do that when she's right here, sitting on my lap. >=)

Ok, I'll put it in better terms...

 

 

:: hits the REAL Molly Holly with a car, Not the blow up doll in Chris' lap, forcing Chris out of the rumble, to go stalk Molly outside the hospital ::

First off, I don't know even where to BUY blow up dolls.

 

Secondly, I would have the resources to find wherever Molly would be.

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

So you ARE a stalker then?

[ChrisMWaters 0]

So you ARE a stalker then?

I'm too busy most of the time to be a stalker.

 

Besides that, I'd rather get a date with Molly on that E! show "Star Date" ^^

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

:: takes a staple gun and staples Chris in the forehead for no reason whatsoever ::

[ChrisMWaters 0]

:: takes a staple gun and staples Chris in the forehead for no reason whatsoever ::

....riiiight.

 

Anyway, anymore tales of the tape?

[Guest Sandman9000]

::Chokes Chris with the measuring tape. Then hits him over the head with a lightbulb. C'mon, y'all knew that one was gonna happen::