SJL Crimson, March 9th

[Guest crusen86]

SJL Crimson, Saturday March 9th

Arena: Adelaide Entertainment Centre, Adelaide, Australia!

 

Singles Match

"Deathwish" Danny Williams vs. "The Superior One" Tom Flesher

- Two newbies, both putting nicknames before their real names. Erm, yeah. Fight.

 

First Pin Wins Match

The Dark Reaper vs. Cutthroat vs. Z

- Reaper and Cutthroat locked up on Metal, with Reaper proving victorious. Can he do it again, with newbie Z thrown into the mix?

 

TV Title Match

Shawn Brody © vs. Mike Van Siclen

- These two have been at each other's throats the last few weeks, and now it's time to decide if MVS can grab back his TV title. Hmm...

 

Singles Match

Mafia vs. Ced Ordonez

- Ced managed to pull off what most would consider an upset on Metal, managing to get the best of Mafia, TomCat and Josh Tupper. Mafiaa gets his chance for retribution here.

 

SWF Contract Tournament:

Bye To The Finals: Lady Red & Erek Taylor

 

No DQ Match

Low Brass vs. Ash Ketchum

- These two XF9ers have butted heads numerous times in the past, and they will go at it one more time. No rules should make things interesting. The winner will face another XF9er for a SWF contract - Erek Taylor.

 

MAIN EVENT

Hell In A Cell Match

K-Os vs. Flexxx

- You may remember a few months ago, that these two had one hell of a rivalry going, exchanging the TV title back and fourth. It was never settled. With it quite possible that one will be gone after this tournament, it's time to settle the rivalry. The devilish cell overs the entire ring, and even almost out to the barriers at ringside. Obviously, there are no rules. Pin your opponent or make them submit for victory. The winner of this match will go on to face Lady Red for a SWF contract.

[Guest crusen86]

[The SJL Crimson logo flashes, and the cameras pan a crowd of excited fans in Adelaide, Australia. Fireworks go off. Such signs as "Edwin Fears Sacred," "I Death Knelled Lady Red" and "K-Os Needs Brass Ones" appear in the crowd. The Crimson theme music fades out as the cameras focus in on Axis and Edwin MacPhisto.]

 

Axis: We are LIVE on tape delay from the sold-out Adelaide Entertainment Centre in Adelaide, Australia, on the final week of our tour of Oceania!

 

Edwin: Yes, we've got a stacked card ahead of you tonight, and it all opens up with a pair of rookies making their SJL debuts tonight. We've got "Deathwish" Danny Williams and "The Superior One" Tom Flesher.

 

Axis: I've seen both of these guys in the workout room, and they're both very talented. They also both have extensive amateur backgrounds, so I expect a fast-paced technical match here.

 

Edwin: They've both got great stamina, largely due to the fact that they're both dedicated fans of Jolt Cola. Jolt - available at a convenience store near you!

 

Axis: It's going to be a long night, I can tell already. Let's go to the ring.

 

[Funyon enters the ring and grabs the mic. The bell rings, and Funyon starts to speak.]

 

Funyon: Ladies and gentlemen, this is our opening contest!

 

["43% Burnt" by Dillinger Escape Plan starts to play, and Danny Williams' highlight video lights up the SmarkTron. As he's being introduced, "Deathwish" Danny Williams walks to the ring, looking very focused. He gets a moderate pop from the crowd, which seems content to watch his ringwork rather than have him work the crowd.]

 

Axis: Look at the look on Williams' face. He's making his debut tonight and I don't think he plans on losing.

 

Edwin: Of course he doesn't plan on losing. What, are you simple? Maybe you need the memory-enhancing effects of Pharmassure-brand Gingko-Biloba formula. KIYAHAHAHAHA!

 

Axis: As a nod to Williams' New Japan history, the ring introductions for tonight are going to be delayed until both wrestlers are in the ring.

 

[Williams enters the ring and warms up somberly as the lights go down. The drumbeat of "The Gauntlet" by Dropkick Murphys sounds over the PA, and when the opening chord strikes, two pillars of pyro explode on the sides of the entrance. After they die down, Flesher steps through the curtain to an explosion of boos. He walks confidently to the ring carrying his beer mug, waving at the booing fans as if he had good sense, and slides into the ring. He drops to his knees at center ring and throws his hands up into the air as the music fades and the boos get louder. As he gets to his feet and sets his beer mug down in the corner, Funyon begins the intros.]

 

Axis: Flesher seems intent on believing that he's adored by the crowd.

 

Edwin: I saw him at the pub last night, buying rounds of Fosters - it's Australian for beer - for anyone wearing a Superior One t-shirt. Turns out he bought Williams here a pair, but that was it.

 

Funyon: To my left, from Louisville, Kentucky, and weighing in tonight at 235 pounds, "Deathwish" Danny Williams! [Williams gets a slightly larger pop this time, probably out of the fans' frustration with Flesher.] And to my right, [the boos start almost instantly] from Buffalo, New York, weighing 213 pounds, "The Superior One" Tom Flesher! [Flesher's pop continues to be annoyingly bad as he waves and blows kisses to the crowd.]

 

DING DING DING!!!!!!

 

Axis: And this first contest is underway. The two wrestlers have each dropped into a sort of amateur-style staggered stance and they're circling around, trying to feel each other out. Each man is throwing strikes at the other - Williams with closed fists, Flesher with palms, and here comes Flesher shooting in for a single-leg takedown.

 

Edwin: Williams counters that just as you'd expect - with a hard elbow to the temple. Bet Flesher wasn't expecting that.

 

Axis: He's stunned, and Williams is taking advantage of that by grabbing his arm and hitting a series of quick armbreakers on Flesher's left arm. Flesher breaks the series after three with a solid palm to the back of the head, and already he's throwing a German suplex! One, and Danny Williams rolls through.

 

Edwin: Flesher seems to be forgetting that he hasn't fatigued Williams at all yet. He's got to wear his opponent down before he starts wasting energy on big throws like that. There are no back points in the SJL - that's just wasted effort.

 

Axis: Williams pops right back up and ties up with Flesher once more. They grapple for a few moments, and here's Williams with a whip to the ropes. Flesher bounces off, ducks a clothesline, hits the ropes on the other side, and Danny Williams executes a drop toehold. Williams takes the leg and works into a leglock of some sort.

 

Edwin: It's like the kid's making up the hold as he goes along. He's obviously got a lot of ring experience and is able to improvise. I bet his improv skills will continue to improve as he shakes off his ring rust.

 

Axis: Williams torques the leg a bit, but again, Flesher isn't fatigued and is able to kick Williams off. Williams bounds into the ropes as Flesher gets to his feet, leapfrog over Flesher, Williams bounces back, and OUCH! Flesher meets him with a vicious Yakuza kick!

Edwin: Flesher wears a size 13 boot, Axis. Those Doc Martens are incredibly heavy, and I'm sure getting pasted in the face with one of those isn't a whole lot of fun. In fact, I'd wager that tomorrow morning Danny Williams will be in need of Nuprin-brand painkillers. If your head hurts, Nupe it!

 

Axis: The Doc Marten to the face sends Williams back into the ropes, and Flesher follows it up with a vicious running palm blow. He grabs the temporarily-stunned Williams and whips him to the other side of the ring, and it looks like he's going for another Yakuza kick. Williams drops down and sweeps his legs out from under him! Flesher bounces back to his feet and is met with a snap suplex. Flesher's back up, and here's another snap suplex! Flesher's up once again but obviously stunned. Danny Williams' ring sense kicks in, and he hooks up a fisherman suplex! Ref counts one, but Flesher kicks to break the cradle! Each man backs off slightly, and the crowd is letting us know that they're loving the ring work!

 

Edwin: These two youngsters are already impressing the crowds, not to mention they both got great reactions from their interview pieces this week. It should be noted, though, that Williams has one inch, 22 pounds and four years on Flesher, and his upper body is much more well-defined. Flesher's reputed to have a slight advantage in the stamina department, but Deathwish gets the nod in the strength and speed departments. The differences are so small, though, that it's a very even match. Williams may come out on top simply because of the nominal weight and experience advantages.

 

Axis: The two wrestlers are back into their stances and circling around each other now. Flesher nails a few tapping palm blows, and now he steps around to the back. He locks his hands for a German suplex, but Williams nails him with an elbow to the side of the head. Williams grabs the left arm, and once again starts with a series of armbreakers on Flesher... the crowd's wincing and counting each one... there's one, two, three, four, and a fifth vicious armbreaker before Deathwish relents! Flesher pulls the arm back and cringes as Danny Williams bridges into a Northern Lights suplex. Ref counts one, two, and Flesher kicks out. Williams keeps the arm, though, and locks on an armbar.

 

Edwin: Flesher's not doing enough to protect that left arm. Danny Williams has made it clear in his prematch interviews, along with the way he's worked for his entire career, that he spends the whole match wearing down the arm to set up the Headlock Chickenwing. Flesher's doing his best to inch toward the ropes, and Danny Williams isn't torquing the hold as much as maybe he should.

 

Axis: Flesher does reach the ropes, and Williams releases the hold at the count of four. Flesher slides out of the ring to catch a breather, and he's massaging the shoulder pretty aggressively.

 

Edwin: This breather is brought to you by Mead office products. Mead: It's not just a honey-flavored beer anymore!

 

Axis: Flesher rolls back into the ring, but he's still a little stunned. Williams sees that and punches him, and now he's going for a DDT. Flesher counters by snagging his leg and turning it into a takedown... now into an ankle lock. Flesher's torquing the ankle very hard, and stepping through. He grabs the other leg, and sits back into a Boston crab!

 

Edwin: Flesher's showing off some very good chain-wrestling skills at this point. It's clear that he's trying to fatigue Deathwish to set him up for the Boilermaker. Speaking of which, I'm very surprised that neither competitor has attempted a brain buster yet. Both of these guys tend to rely on savage head-dropping as their main offense, but I think the two of them know that it's practically impossible to pull off a move on someone who knows that move and all its counters. If you try to brainbust "Deathwish" Danny Williams, you'll probably end up on your back.

 

Axis: Flesher realizes that he's not going to get a submission, so he releases the Boston crab and drops an elbow on the back of Williams' skull. He follows the elbow up with a diving headbutt, and now he gets to his feet - STANDING SENTON! He just dropped a senton onto Williams' body, and that's gotta hurt! Tom lifts him up, hooks the leg and the head, and throws a Lotus suplex. Williams lands hard, but he rolls through and Flesher falls away. Both guys up to their feet, and Danny Williams looks to be slightly more fatigued than Flesher after that flurry.

 

Edwin: They tie up, but Danny breaks that tie pretty quickly with a series of knife-edge chops! [The crowd yells "WHOO!" with each chop that connects.] Williams... THERE IT IS. He sets Flesher up and nails the first brain buster of the match! Ref counts one... two... and Flesher kicks out! Williams turns Flesher over and attempts to lock on an STF, but Flesher kicks him off.

 

Axis: Both wrestlers are back on their feet. Williams is taking advantage of the momentary stunned state of mind that Flesher is in, and he steps around for a German suplex. Williams bridges for one, two, and Flesher rolls through. He staggers up with the help of the ropes, and starts throwing palm thrusts. He nails a hard one to Danny's jaw, and Williams is knocked senseless for a moment while Flesher regains his composure and starts throwing the palms with some semblance of order. Tom backs him into the corner and takes a moment to breathe before throwing another palm strike to the jaw. He starts throwing hard European uppercuts, and finally gets Williams doubled over. He executes a piledriver, but is still too out of it to go for the pin, opting instead to just drop the elbow onto his opponent's chest.

 

Edwin: What's this? [Gestures toward the aisle.] Is that...? Yes, it's the Fallen Angel, Shawn Brody! Brody's decided to come out and watch this match, and he's just set up a chair in the aisle. It's obviously a Dobmeier Supplies-brand steel folding chair, judging by the strength it shows under the pressure that Brody's putting on it.

 

Axis: Oh, would you please stop? Flesher's noticed that Brody's in the aisle, and it looks like that's serving as some sort of inspiration to him. He lifts Deathwish up to his feet and throws a beautiful, arching, released German suplex. Williams takes a hard bump on the neck and shoulders.

 

Edwin: Oh my, it looks like The Superior One's really putting his work boots on now that Brody's in the aisle. Those are, of course, Doc Marten work boots polished with their proprietary Doc Marten-brand daubing wax, available at your local cobbler.

 

Axis: Flesher whips Williams hard into the corner, and then backs out. He builds up some speed and nails a vicious running palm blow to Danny's chest! That'll take the wind right out of you! Now he's backing out... BAM! A Yakuza kick to the face with that enormous Doc Marten boot! Flesher goes for a superkick, but Williams somehow manages to catch the leg and execute a dragon screw! He attempts to continue it into a leglock, but Flesher flops around like a fish out of water and prevents him from locking it up. Flesher charges away, but Williams catches him with a backdrop suplex! Flesher rolls through and staggers to the ropes. Williams charges behind him and locks up a full nelson... DRAGON SUPLEX! But no, Flesher reaches down to hook the leg and Williams goes harmlessly to his back! Williams still has the arm locked, but Flesher grabs the ropes before he can do any serious damage. The fans are on their feet after that sequence!

 

Edwin: Flesher slides out of the ring to catch another quick breather. He looks over, remembers that Brody's there, and pauses to think about what's to be done... but Deathwish Danny Williams makes that decision for him by nailing him with a baseball slide missile dropkick to the back of the head!

 

Axis: Williams rolls Flesher back into the ring and climbs to the top... and there's the diving elbow off the top rope. The referee counts one... two... thr- NO, Flesher kicks out! Williams is getting a little bit frustrated, and neither wrestler quite knows what to do at this point.

 

Edwin: It looks like Brody knows what to do. He's up on the apron encouraging Flesher, but the referee comes over to admonish him to get out of the ring area. Meanwile, Tom's staggered over to his corner and he's got that beer mug.

 

Axis: No, he wouldn't... DAMN, he just nailed Williams with that beer mug! He hit him right in the temple! Williams is so stunned by the force of the blow that he just stumbles backwards and lands in the corner as Flesher tosses the beer mug back into his own corner. He charges into the corner and nails the crumbled Williams in the face with a Doc Marten. Flesher lifts Williams up and sets him on the top rope, and now slams him in the chest with a palm blow. He turns around, and there's an Iconoclasm! Flesher then climbs to the top rope and dives off with a flying headbutt! Wow!

 

Edwin: He calls that the Superiority Complex, and it's fairly evident why, as he's completely ignoring the cover and showboating in the center of the ring. Look at that, on his knees with his hands in the air as if he'd just won an Olympic gold medal!

 

Axis: The crowd is booing Flesher mercilessly as he finally gets back up and drops an elbow onto Danny Williams' chest. He goes for the cover, not even bothering to hook the leg. The referee counts one, two, thre- NO! "Deathwish" Danny Williams kicks out! He kicked out! Flesher lifts him to his feet and sets up another Lotus suplex- no, it's a Lotus driver this time! Williams is motionless! And Flesher, that pompous ass, Flesher isn't going to go for the pin! He's grabbing Williams' legs to set up the Boston crab so it looks like he made the tough-as-nails New Japan veteran submit! What an egomaniac!

 

Edwin: He's not going to get the Boston crab! Williams is stiffening up too much for Flesher to turn him, and now he kicks him off! Williams gets to his feet just in time to nail Flesher with a desperation lariat to the chest! He knocks the wind out of Flesher and grabs his left arm! He swings the arm over his shoulder and attempts and armbreaker, but Flesher won't allow it! He nails Williams with a hard palm thrust to the back of the head, and Williams staggers into the ropes! He bounces back toward Flesher, Flesher grabs him around the waist, and it's a BACKDROP DRIVER! My god, I think Williams is DEAD!

 

Axis: Flesher lifts Williams to his feet and whips him to the corner. Flesher charges in and top speed and nails him with an avalanche! There's no question, Williams is done after that backdrop driver. Flesher lifts Williams to the top rope, and now climbs up. It's time for the Boilermaker! Flesher lifts Williams straight up into the air and falls back, flat, driving Williams' head into the mat! Flesher can barely move himself, but he somehow manages to roll over and drape an arm onto Williams' chest. The referee counts one, two, and THREE!

 

DING DING DING!

 

Funyon: The winner of this match, "The Superior One" Tom Flesher!

 

[brody enters the ring as "The Gauntlet" starts playing over the PA again, and helps Flesher to his feet. Williams eventually comes around as Flesher and Brody make their way to the back, and Williams is clearly pissed. Fade to commercial.]

[Guest crusen86]

(… And we’re back! The camera does its ceremonial pre-match fly in, zooming around the electric crowd whom have started a massive “AXIS!” chant. The camera finally settles on the commentary table, manned, as always, by Axis and Edwin MacPhisto. Axis is standing in his chair, reveling in the crowds’ cheers.)

 

Edwin: Welcome back to SJL Crimson! We are live from the SOLD OUT Adelaide Entertainment Centre, in Adelaide, Australia!  As you can see, my compatriot is currently enjoying the perks of a hometown crowd…

 

(Axis gives one final wave to the crowd, before sitting back down next to Edwin.)

 

Edwin: Nothing like being the hometown boy, huh?

Axis: Damn Skippy!

Edwin (smiling): Thought so. Anyway, coming up next is a quasi-rematch from Metal.

Axis: That’s right, The Dark Reaper took on Cutthroat, in his debut match, with Reaper getting the duke.

Edwin: ‘But, Edwin’ you, the audience, ask, ‘How come a quasi rematch?’. Well, gentle ratings givers, it’s because this time, another newbie has been added! Yes, true believers, alphabet protagonist Z has been added to this match, one that should be another exhibition of terrific technicality, and curious chaos! Along with-

Axis: Okay, Stan Lee, I’d say that’s enough.

Edwin: Excelsior!

 

Funyon: The following match, scheduled for one fall, is a Triple Threat, in which the first pinfall wins!

 

(As Funyon finishes, an eerie, rhythmic thudding echo’s through the AEC. The SmarkTron flickers to life, showing the image of a man walking down a deserted road. As he steps closer the rhythmic thudding gets louder… and louder… until the man on the SmarkTron stops, right in front of the camera. The arena hushes completely, as it is dropped into darkness. “I’m Back” A deep, gravelly voice calls into the AEC, as the lights switch on synonymous with HUGE white fireworks at the entrance! As the pyro screams skyward, the opening riff of Puddle Of Mudds’ ‘Control’ kicks across the arena. With that, The Dark Reaper strides from the Gorilla Area, to an impressive pop!

 

Edwin: And there he is!

Axis: The Reaper returned to the JL-

Edwin: Large as life and twice as ugly.

Axis (annoyed): Yes, well, he came back on Metal, dismantling an unprepared Cutthroat, in HIS debut match. Reaper finished him off with his hellacious finisher, The End.

 

(As Axis narrates, Reaper climbs over the top rope, and puts one foot on the nearest turnbuckle, pumping on fist in the air to another impressive reaction.)

 

Funyon: Now in the ring, tipping the scales at three hundred pounds! From London England, The Dark… REAPERRR”!!

 

(Reaper steps down from the turnbuckle, before turning to wait against it. He doesn’t have to wait long, as the funky beat of Faith No Mores’ ‘Epic’ bounces across the stereo, introducing an less than enthusiastic Z, who sidesteps his way down to the ring, eyeing The Reaper anxiously.)

 

Funyon: Introducing next, making his SJL debut, weighing in a two hundred twenty-nine pounds, from Trenton NJ… Z!!

 

(Z climbs the stairs, not breaking his fearful stare of Reaper. He enters the ring… well, he tries to, but looking someplace else while doing something else can be deadly, as Z trips over the second rope, falling face flat, electing laughter from the crowd. He clambers to his feet, and goes to the corner as FAR away from Reaper as he can, sitting on the mat, and waiting anxiously.)

 

Axis: And that would be our third, count em’, THIRD newbie on the show! That must be close to some sort of record.

Edwin: Eh, maybe. Z here is hoping to try and avoid the same fate as Cutthroat, losing to Reaper in his debut match.

Axis: Losing to Reap… You don’t think Z might lose to Cutthroat?

Edwin: *BasketballASA* couldn’t lose to Cutthroat.

Axis: Ouch.

 

(A sudden arena blackout hushes the crowd once more, followed by glorious electrical feedback. A THUNDORUS explosion of pyrotechnics erupts from the stage!

 

Axis: Speaking of whom…

Edwin: …BaksetballASA?

Axis: What? No! I meant Cutthroat! (Mumbled) Though he might as well be BasketballASA…

Edwin: Oh, sorry. If it really was BasketballASA, I was going to try and get his autograph. (Grins) He’s a legend, y’know.

 

(With that, the sound of crashing drums (The beginning of ‘Dirty Day’) announce the arrival of Cutthroat! With a decidedly even crowd, he stands on the stage and begins POSING… UP… A… STORM! That done, he strides down the ramp, tossing his orange shirt behind him, into the crowd, before breaking into a sprint and sliding under the bottom rope.)

 

Funyon: And finally, from Greenwich, Connecticut, weighing in at 244 pounds… CUTTROAAAT!!  

 

 

(Cutthroat removes his sleek sunglasses, tossing them into the crowd, before taking one of the last two unoccupied corners. With all the competitors here, official Matthew Kivell signals the timekeeper.)

 

**Ding! Ding! Ding!**

 

Axis: And we are underway!

Edwin: And immediately, cutthroat is using the same strategy as the last match!

 

(True to Edwin’s words, Cutthroat charges Reaper, attempting to cheapshot him just like last match. Reaper notices him out of the corner of his eye, and ducks Cutthroat’s hasty clothesline, turns, and tees-off with Cutthroats head! Gazing at the action, Z slowly backs away, evacuating the ring as deliberately as he can.)

 

Axis: …Z’s already running away?  

Edwin: Nonsense. It’s a tactical retreat, I’m sure.

 

(Reaper pounds Cutthroat’s face a last time, before grabbing his arm in an irish whip attempt. It’s only partially successful, as Cutthroat uses his momentum against Reaper, digging his feet into the mat and reversing! As he bounces off of the opposite ropes, Z grabs his ankle, toppling him, and pulls him out of the ring.)

 

Edwin: See? I told ya’.

Axis (tiredly): Yes, yes, you’re very smart. Now shut up.

 

(Referee Matty K leans over the rope, admonishing Z and shouting at him to “Get it back in the ring!” Z ignores him, watching The Reaper arise as Kivell starts the ten count.

 

“One!”

       

As Reaper gets up, Z throws a heavy, overhand punch… which is easily blocked by Reapers forearm. Reaper responds with his free arm, jamming his hand into Z esophagus and dropping him with a throat thrust.

 

“Two!”

 

The Reaper grabs Z’s hair, yanking him to his feet. He seizes Z’s arm and attempts another whip, only to have it reversed again, as Z uses the same trick Cutthroat did. Reaper hurtles down the outside of the ring… and into a waiting Cutthroat! From around the metal post, Cutthroat leaps forward with a diving clothesline, successfully falling The Dark Reaper to the ground!

 

“Three!”

 

Z marches down to Cutthroat giving an enthusiastic thumbs up. He points at Cutthroat and himself, in the universal “Hey, let’s buddy up.” gesture. Cutthroat regards Z blankly, before looking down at his now extended hand.)

 

Axis: Looks like Z is going to try and ally with Cutthroat. In a match like this, that’s not exactly a bad idea.

Edwin: Speaking of “Not-exactly-bad-ideas” these three should probably return to sanctuary, lest they ALL lose.

 

“Four! C’mon guys, hurry up and bring it back here!”

 

(Cutthroat looks up from Z’s hand, and back at his face. He pauses for a moment… before smiling in a less than entirely trustworthy way, and extending his hand graciously. Z accepts, all smiles… until Cutthroat tightens his grip on Z’s hand, jerking him forward and doubling him over with a sharp toe kick! Gripping Z’s head in a front-facelock, Cutthroat plunges downward with a DDT on the floor!

 

Axis: Ugh! What a disgusting cheapshot!

Edwin: Ha! Beautiful move! You should know there’s no ally’s in this match, Axis.

Axis: Yeah, well… Hey, you’re not supposed to be a heel!

Edwin: Erm… Oh… yeah… A-heh, I guess wrestling the clan all the time can do that to you. (Edwin laughs uncomfortably.)

 

“Five!”

 

(Sniggering in spite of himself, Cutthroat slides into the ring, awaiting the hopeful countout. Turning his head to one side, Cutthroat’s smirk disappears as he sees Reaper climbing over the ropes, look less than pleased.)

 

Edwin: Uh-oh… Katie bar the door! Looks like Cutthroat might be getting his just desserts!

Axis: Cutthroat bounds off the ropes, ducking The Reapers heavy forearm smash. He’s on the rebound…

(Axis blinks at what happens next.)

Axis: And Cutthroat is *leveled* by a scissors kick! Great athleticism by the big man!

 

(Cutthroat scrambles up, but before he can do anything, Reaper nabs his arm and bounces him against the ropes, chucking him towards the opposite ones in yet another irish whip.)

 

Axis: Reaper is telegraphing a backdrop… and Cutthroat leapfrogs over him!

Edwin: He’s off the opposite ropes, and clenches Reaper, who’s slow to arise, In a superb bulldogging headlock! Ruff-ruff!

Axis: You know, Matty K hasn’t been keeping that count up. I wonder if he remembers about Z?

 

(As if overhearing Axis, Kivell glances over his shoulder, looking for the match participant in question. He sees Z, clambering onto the ring apron, dishelved, but no less worse for wear.)

 

Axis: Good Lord, Z is up already?! That was a DDT on the floor he took, folks.

Edwin: Eh, he probably has one of those X-Men mutant healing factors. As long as he doesn’t die and come back, I’ll be all right.

 

(As Z falls over the second rope and into the ring, Cutthroat has busied himself with picking Reaper off of the canvas. Capturing his left arm in a wristlock, Cutthroat spins and gives quick toe kicks to Reapers gut. Then, he winds himself around Reapers arm one more time, leveraging back and attempting a heel kick to Reapers mug… which he ducks! Cutthroat cannot help but follow through, ending up in the awkward position of having Reapers arm through his own legs. Reaper easily tears his hand free, grasping Cutthroats thigh, while his other grabs hold of Cutthroats shoulder, hefting him up in a gargantuan gorilla press!

 

Axis: Awesome display of power by Reaper!

Edwin: Cutthroat can see his house from there!

Axis: The crowd here, showing their approval as Reaper walks to the ropes and…. and… (Axis grimaces) drops Cutthroat in a rather unhealthy position. Gee, I hope he didn’t want to father children.

Edwin(high-pitched): Cutthroat! Cutthroat! Cutthroat!

 

(As cutthroat straddles the top rope, a look of obvious discomfort on his face, Reaper seizes the top rope, and, with a sadistic grin on his face, begins to jerk it up and down violently! Cutthroat screams like a little girl, just before Reaper gives the rope one final yank, which bounces Cutthroat into the ring and onto the canvas with a ‘thud’. Satisfied, Reapers goes to look for Z, but not before a sharp whistle turns his attention to the top rope. His eyes widen as he sees Z, squatting on the top rope, blow him a kiss, before leaping into the heavens! On his way down, Z quickly locks Reapers head in his arms, and drops him on the top rope, neck first, in a flying guillotine! Reaper falls back onto the mat as Z crashes to the outside. Splat.)

 

Axis: Great aerial move by Z! …Though, that puts all three men down.

Edwin: Would anyone believe me if I told them that were Z’s first offensive move of the match?

 

(As quickly as he can, Z rises to his feet, clenching his teeth in an attempt to block out the pain shooting from his back. Rolling into the ring, Z hooks Reapers leg –with a grunt of extra effort- and rolled across his back for a pin attempt.)

 

Axis: First pinfall attempt of the match! One! Tw-no good! Reaper kicks out.

Edwin: For someone Reapers size, I’m surprised a that move even got that much of a count. And Axis, leave the counting to the ref. I hate when people do that.

 

(Z rolls off and away from Reaper, as both he and Cutthroat come to their feet at the same time. Z stands as well, and all three men circle one-another. At the exact same moment, they all charge forward, locking themselves in a three-way collar and elbow tie-up. They all jockey for position, until Reaper steadies himself, and hurls both Cutthroat and Z clear across the ring! Both stand on wobbly legs, and stumble around for a few moments, trying to clear the cobwebs. Z, being Z, stumbles right into The Reaper, who latches onto his arm, and pitches Z toward the turnbuckle with a vengeance. The sheer force of the irish whip causes Z to stumble, and crash into the turnbuckle head first, flipping himself upside-down forcefully, and locking his feet underneath the top of the turnbuckle, unintentionally tying himself in the Tree of Woe!

 

Axis: Man, Z’s got himself in a predicament here. He’s all tied up, and has two bigger, nastier bastards coming at him.

Edwin: I don’t think Z has to much to worry about, Axis. Do you honestly think that Reaper and Cutthroat would be able to do a co-operative beatdown?

 

(Reaper advances on the hapless Z almost methodically, and gave a lowly, almost pitiful glance at lowly man at his own mercy. He stares for a long moment, contemplating…)

 

Edwin: Looks like Reaper is having some sort of epiphany…

Axis: Is he going to crumble to his own human mercy, and take solace in the helpless Z?

 

(Reaper nods, having reached some sort of decision, He reaches out with his hands… and seizes the top rope, pulling back for extra leverage, and throwing heavy stomps into Z’s mid-section.)

 

Edwin: Nope, just gauging where to put the kicks.

 

(Reaper continues, unabated, until another set of hands grasps his shoulder, spinning him around. There, Cutthroat stands, arguing about something the camera doesn’t pick up. Reaper gives an obvious retort, while Z pathetically tries to right himself. Cutthroat argues again, before Reaper nods agreeably…  before both turn and stomp Z together!

 

Axis: ‘Don’t worry, Axis, do you honestly think Reaper and Cutthroat can co-operate.’ hunh?

(Not knowing what else to do, Edwin shrugs)

Axis: Finally, referee Matthew Kivell stops this, threatening to disqualify Cutthroat and Reaper if they don’t let up!

 

(Indeed, Matty K does separate Cutthroat and Reaper from beating on Z, and as he tries to untangle Z’s feet, Reaper and Cutthroat turn… and each realizes ‘*I* just helped *HIM?!*’. On that thought, both men exchange punches, with Cutthroat smoking Reaper in the face with a southpaw. He tries again, only to have Reaper block it with his forearm, and counter with a massive overhand punch! Reaper follows up with a second… a third… and the fourth sends Cutthroat dropping to his knees. With a pop from the crowd, Reaper grabs a handful of Cutthroats hair, preparing something. Cutthroat, however, serves a quick glance over to Kivell –who is still trying to untangle Z- and fires off a Slice Punch directly into Reapers groin! A collective groan of sympathy echoes across the arena, one with rapidly segues into loud jeers in Cutthroats direction.)

 

Axis: Another cheapshot form Cutthroat! Where the hell is Kivell!? He should be disqualified!

Edwin: It’s not a cheapshot, Axis! It’s payback for what Reaper did earlier!

 

(Regarding the booing with only a confident smirk, Cutthroat slides under the ring ropes and stands on ring apron. Monitoring the slow to recover Reaper carefully, Cutthroat hops on the tope ring rope, soaring across the canvas and smashing Reaper with a Springboard Torpedo Dropkick! Cutthroat scrambles over to the fallen giant, rolling him over as quickly as he can, getting a pin. He bangs the mat, getting the attention of Matthew Kivell, who has finally untangled Z, whom slides across the mat.)

 

ONE!

 

Axis: No!

 

TWO!

 

Axis: Not this way!

 

THRE-- NO!!

 

(Z gathers himself from below the turnbuckle, and sprints across the ring, breaking the count with a knee drop on Cutthroats back! He rolls off of Reaper, and Z goes down, quickly grabbing a leg!

 

Edwin: Hey, no fair! Opportunistic little—

Axis: Watch it!

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Th—No!

 

(This pin does get far either, as Cutthroat stomps on the back of Z’s head. Murmuring, Cutthroat exits the ring, and picks up the chair Funyon is sitting on!

 

Edwin: Uh-Oh… Looks like Cutthroats going for a bit of the old ultra-violence.

Axis: Cutthroat cheats again? Shock!

 

(Cutthroat folds the chair up with a ‘clank!’ and slides it into the ring. He enters, but is stopped by Matty K. His reprimands of Cutthroat are cut short, however, as Reaper grabs him and hurls him to the post. Just like the first time, Cutthroat reverses. He stalks to the turnbuckle, and tries to whip Reaper to the opposite, but Reaper reverses this whip, doing a dose-do and sending Cutthroat back into he tried to whip him from!

 

Edwin: o/~Take your partner by the hand, whip him as hard as you can, throw him far, dose-do! Slam him low and hurl him high, bonus points if the bastard dies!~\o

Yee-Haw!

 

(Cutthroat slumps into the corner, as Reaper grabs the dazed Z, hatching a plan. Securing him under his arm like a battering ram, Reaper takes a few steps back, and charges the post, busting Cutthroat in the gut with Z to huge cheers! He does it a second time, before setting Z on his shoulder like a spear, and throwing him outside of the ring! In agony, Cutthroat wobbles out of the turnbuckle… and into Reapers arms! Reaper throws his right arm under Cutthroats, and across his chest. With this arm alone, he lifts him skyward, casually slamming him down with The Scythe! Instead of pinning Cutthroat, Reaper raises both arms, with the crowd responding when they realize what that means. Raising Cutthroat by his shirt, Reaper sets him at his side, before gasping his waist with both of his hands.)

 

Axis: That’s the setup for The End! Cutthroat lost to this move in his first match!

 

(With little difficulty, Reaper lifts Cutthroat onto his shoulder. With his little fight left, Cutthroat kicks violently, managing to jerk himself free. Sliding down his back, Cutthroat takes a step back, and connects with a good, hard shoulderblock, that sends Reaper stumbling into the turnbuckle… inadvertently avalanching Matthew Kivell!

 

Axis: And the ref gets bumped…

Edwin: Never a good sign.

 

(Reaper looks down, and shakes Kivell in an attempt to revive him. This is interrupted, however, at Cutthroats yell of ‘Hey, catch!’. The Reaper spins… and catches a chair out of reflex. Before he can even think the obvious, Cutthroat takes a sidestep, and superkicks the chair into Reaper’s face!

 

Edwin: Hey, was that clang from the chair or Reapers head?

Axis: A better question might be, ‘Did that work or not?’.

 

(Axis’s question is immediately answered, as Reapers hands go limp, dropping the chair. His feet falter, and his knees buckle, thudding loudly as he lands on them. Reapers eye -the one visible - rolls into the back of his head, and finally, he collapses face-first, out cold.)

 

Edwin: Answer your question?

Axis: Yes. But answer me this; what is Cutthroat going to do about Z?

 

(Again, the heavens immediately answer Axis’s question, as a (sort of)recovered Z slides into the ring, not giving Cutthroat a chance to pin the done-for Reaper. Quickly snatching-up his chair, Z and Cutthroat face off in middle of the ring, staring each other down.)

 

Edwin: Hot damn! This tension is thicker than marmalade, and almost twice as gooey!

Axis: Hmmm… From what we’ve seen of these two, this is almost uncharacteristic. Something has to give.

 

(Making Axis look like a prophet, just as the two circle each other, Z, being Z, trips over his feet, toppling him backwards into the ropes! Seeing his opening, Cutthroat advances on Z as he plea-bargains pitifully, holding his hand out in a vain attempt to beg off Cutthroat. Grinning a feral grin, Cutthroat raises his chair...)

 

Axis: Oh man, this is it!

Edwin: Run! No, wait, hide! No! No! Um… um… Duck!!

 

(Making a desperate noise in the back of his throat, Z quickly glances either way, realizing he’s totally out of options. Seeing the chair descend, Z dropped to his knees, cowering. The chair bounces off of the top rope… and rebounds into Cutthroats face! Cutthroat falls backwards with a resounding thud!

 

Both: …

Axis: I don’t believe this.

 

(Seeing the fallen cutthroat through a single open eye, Z leaps across the canvas, getting a lateral press! This pin garnering the attention of recovering Matty K, he groggily starts the count.)

 

One…

 

 

Two!

 

 

 

 

THREE!!

 

 

Axis: Un… Unbelievable…. Z just STOLE the match!

 

Funyon: The winner of this bout, by pinfall… Z!

 

(Faith No More’s ‘Epic’ funks up, as Matty K raises Z’s -who’s surprised himself- hand.)

 

Edwin: That has to be the darndest thing I’ve ever seen…

Axis: Well, up next, Shawn Brody defends his TV title, and in the MAIN EVENT K-O’s takes on Flexxx in a Hell In The Cell! Don’t go away!

 

(Cut to commercial)

[Guest crusen86]

PROMO: Waffle Irons and Toasters

--------

Jumping back from commercial, the roar of the crowd is omnipresent as the camera pans to the inside of a large arena in Adelaide, Australia, inside the Adelaide Entertainment Center, setting for tonight’s SJL event… SJL Metal! It seems to be between matches now, as things are still being cleaned up from the last match! The camera continues to pan the arena of happy fans, then cuts to the announcers table, where Axis and Edwin sit smiling, though we can only see Axis. The mandatory stuffed panda is placed next to the Panda Wrangler’s monitor.

 

Axis: …And welcome back to SJL Metal, live from Adelaide!!! As usual, Axis here, joined by Edwin Mac-

 

Edwin: I know! I'm excited!

 

Axis: You have a problem…

 

Edwin: Because it's comedic.

 

Axis: Why are you speaking a sentence ahead of me?

 

Edwin: HAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

Axis: Don't laugh… but before you get off track… do you know what this is?

 

Edwin: A NEW CAR?!?!?!?!

 

Axis: No… Ash Ketchum's one -year anniversary video!

 

Edwin: I KNOW!!! I MADE IT!!! LOOK!!!

 

 

Suddenly, the shot of Edwin and Axis is replaced by a montage of clips as "Lonely Road of Faith" by Kid Rock plays in the background…

 

"Up and down that lonely road of faith

I have been there

Unprepared for the storms and the tides that rise

I've realized one thing, how much I love you

And it hurts to see, see you cryin'

I believe we can make it through the winds of change…"

 

As those words echo throughout the arena, the first match of Ash's career, the March 7th edition of IGNML Mirage, facing Brimstone, plays. Ash makes his way down the ramp, then clips from the match play, Ash hits a DDT, tries a suplex and fails, and eventually taps out to a painful sharpshooter.

 

Then, more clips air. DDTing Lucky, pinning IL in several different matches to pick up the victory, flying from the top of the Hell In A Poke Ball cage into the old Snorlax Splash onto Pokemaster. Back when it was a 450 'Lo Down. Then a shot of Ash Pikaslamming Pokemster through the flaming announcer's table, pinning Vlad De Burrov, and the infamous ladder match in which he won his IGNML TV Title.

 

"God is great indeed

If you believe, in the everlife

Yeah we gotta

Make some sense of the piece that's not defined

And if you just hold on, I won't let ya fall

We can make it through the storms and the winds of change

Though I walk through the valley of darkness

I am not afraid

Cause I know I'm not alone…"

 

More clips air through this section, including Ash's last ML match, pinning IL to the mat, and his first JL matches in the undercard for the IGNJL TV Title. Then, the clips change, showing Ash during Red Storm Rising's reign over the JL: Punching Brimstone, several clips from his infamous match inside the steel cage with LDP. More clips follow, but now, Ash is out of the ring, just being Michael Craven. Along side him in the next two-second clip is Amy Wheeler, otherwise known as Misty, the two backstage. Then a quick shot of Misty hitting her Mistycanrana on Renegade. And another moment pops up: Ash's defeat of Chris Raynor with a vicious jumping Mew Driver and pin, plus shots of Ash partying with XF9 and smiling…

 

But then… the music gets heavier…

 

"And if the wind blows east, would you follow me

And if the wind blows north, would ya stay your course

And if the wind blows west, would ya second guess

And if it blows to the south, would you count me out

And if the sun don't shine, would you still be mine

And if the sky turns grey, would you walk away

Would you say I do, if I say I'll be

And walk this road through life with me…"

 

Shots of "The Raging Bull" Ash Ketchum intermixed with many more hardcore spots and bumps Ash has taken. Snorlax Splashes off ladders, Mew Drivers onto ring bells, chair shots, falls and spills the Undercard King was put through. But as the song mellows out again, the shots of hardcoreness are replaced with shots of Ash in other big matches that seem to be long forgotten, including his two wins for the Tag/Stables Titles with Misty and Brass, respectively.

 

"You know I love youuuuuu…"

 

"On this lonely road of faith…"

 

As the song winds down to the last two lines, a timeline of sorts of Ash's evolution, from the first Ash to the current one, is played, each Ash showing how much he has changed physically, but not as much as a person.

 

"On this lonely road of faith…"

 

As the montage ends, the screen turns black as white words appear on the screen, followed by a voice.

 

"The preceding has been a paid advertisement by the nWo…"

 

The screen then fades to black, but more words pop up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Just kidding. Produced by Ash Ketchum."

 

Suddenly, before anyone can speak, another shot opens up. X Force Nine Locker Room. Ben Hardy stands there, trusty mic in hand, next to him the "birthday" boy, Ash. Ben begins to speak.

 

Ben: Ash, congratulations on your one-year anniversary-

 

Ash: Thank you, Benjamin,

 

Ben: Ash… the question on everyone's mind is this: How does it feel to be to have not only been here this long, and still with a shot at a WF Contract? How do you feel about all of this?

 

Ash: Benjamin… one year seems to have been forever, as you saw in that little video I put together… but about the tournament? You know what? Whatever happens, happens. If I lose… oh well. If I win… yay for me. But I will tell you this: I have a goal. That goal is to leave this JL as a LEGEND… and a champion. And I will. I will do whatever I have to… whatever it takes to get gold. And trust me… I WILL.

 

Ash looks up, smiles, then walks off, going off to get ready for his match as the screen fades to a commercial…

[Guest crusen86]

“Welcome back to SJL Crimson! I’m Edwin MacPhistoooooo... and at my side is native Aussie, Axis!” We fade back in to "Runaway" by Linkin Park and the cheers of a sold-out Adelaide, Australia crowd. The arena goes dim and a blue spotlight shines down on the entranceway, greeting MVS as he steps out from behind the curtains with Melissa flanking him at a short distance. The light follows MVS down towards the ring as he slaps hands with the fans and mouths off about tonight being his night to reclaim his TV title.

 

WHAM! A blast of white pyro illuminates the former TV champ and Melissa as the two make it to the ring. MVS slides in as Melissa heads up the ring steps and climbs in over the bottom rope. She claps it up as MVS hops onto the second turnbuckle pad and poses... amazingly, he is received in cheers. “The fans are really backing Van Siclen after the brutal attack on him by ‘The Fallen Angel’ who just happens to be his opponent here tonight,” Axis informs all the fans at home. Edwin chimes in with his ever-present opinion. “Sympathy points, Axis, but I can’t blame them.”

 

MVS jumps back off the turnbuckle, liking the feel of these new cheers. He starts to stretch out as the camera swings back around to the entranceway. MVS keeps an eye out for The Fallen Angel as he says to a few words to Melissa while the eerie intro of Stabbing Westward’s “Darkest Days” starts to emanate from the PA system. The slow jingle of bells and the beat of a drum catch the fans’ attention as they turn their heads to the entranceway. The lights dim and start to strobe against the black velvet curtains as the anticipating fans await his arrival with the music growing in volume. A figure in a black robe steps out from behind the curtains to a mass of mixed emotions from the fans as flashbulbs start to pop and sparkle all around.

 

“Shawn Brody,” Edwin starts, “Now known as ‘The Fallen Angel,’ has made his presents felt here in the League. Ever since his debut he has been turning heads but his biggest impact was joining up with the Clan.” Axis buts in, “Don’t forget about him winning the TV Title on his fourth match.” Edwin replies, “I’m getting there, Axis, don’t fret. Where was I? Oh, after joining the Clan, we have seen another side of this man...” Brody strides to the ring with his black robe flowing behind him, boos echoing in his ears overcoming his music in volume. He rolls into the ring as the Smarks Tron airs the clip of MVS in Brody’s barbed wire Camel Clutch. Brody looks over his shoulder, eyeing it with a sneer before hopping up onto the opposite turnbuckle from MVS.

 

“No remorse,” Edwin says in a sigh. “We’ve seen a one-eighty turnaround from this man—the blonde acrobat to the black braided sadist. The influence of the Clan is strong within in him.” Brody opens his robe and flashbulbs begin to pop once more, making the brand new SJL TV title sparkle. Axis has to play the devil’s advocate and starts in. “You can’t deny the fact that the Clan it the reason he has that title around his waist. Sure he has the raw talent but sometimes that’s not enough.” Brody disrobes and drapes it over the ring post before raising his arms, instigating the hate-filled reaction from the fans. This actually gets a rise out of him as he grins and puts his hands down, undoing the belt. It drops from his waist but he holds onto the strap and hops out of the corner.

 

The official accepts the belt and folds it before holding it high above his head. He presents the gold to all sides of the arena as Funyon takes his mic. “The following contest is for the Smarks Junior League TELEVISION CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, the challenger...” the camera zooms to MVS in his corner with Melissa at his side with both hands pointing to her man. “Accompanied to the ring by the lovely Melissa, he weighs in tonight at 237 pounds, hailing from Harrison, Illinois... ‘The Amazin’ MIKE VAN SICLEN!!” The fans cheer as MVS points to Brody and then to the title before outlining it around his waist with his hands. Brody only smirks in reply...

 

“Thooo!” The referee dodges a flying loogie aimed in Siclen’s direction. The loogie falls short (as intended) but gets the point is across. “What sportsman ship,” Edwin says, dripping with sarcasm as Funyon regains his composure and starts back up. “Weighing in tonight at 227 pounds... He is a member of the Clan and the Smarks Junior League Television Champion... ‘THE FALLEN ANGEL’ SHAWN BRODY!!” Brody outstretches his arms, leading to a less than hospitable reaction from the fans. Unfazed he adjusts the tape on his wrists as the official hands the title to the ring crew and calls for the bell... “DING! DING! DING!” Melissa clears out of the ring.

 

Axis beats Edwin to the punch with the infamous: “And we’re underway!” Brody initiates circling up as he heads to the adjacent corner and then MVS heads to the opposite. Eyes locked, they slowly close the gap between themselves and tighten their circling. They measure each other up and look for breaks in the other man’s defenses with caution. Brody fakes for MVS’ leg but Siclen is on his best game as he smoothly hops back. They pause and then start to circle up once more. MVS stops and presents a hand with fingers spread apart... Brody stops circling as well and cautiously extends his hand to MVS’ to lock up... MVS goes to lace fingers but Brody has second thoughts and pulls back.

 

MVS keeps things calm by starting to circle up once again. He stops, eyes Brody and presents his and again... Brody accepts as he reaches back and laces fingers. “And they go into the test of strength!” calls Edwin. Once their first hand lock is firm, they have their other hands meet to lace fingers... and do, but Brody jets out a kick to MVS’ midsection and gets an advantage as he starts to power the stunned Siclen back. MVS gains control as he starts to power Brody off and back until he is bridged over Siclen’s left knee. Brody rolls backwards and back to his feet, breaking the grip on Siclen’s right hand and twisting his left arm and taking it into a hammerlock as he moves behind MVS and straightens him back up.

 

“Smart counter by Brody, winning the test of strength with wit. I don’t believe I’ve seen that before, at least, not from that position. His skill really has improved since joining with the Clan. I can only guess that they have been training him.” Axis finishes but Edwin glares at him and his non-anti-Clan stance. “What?” Axis isn’t answered, but anywho... Brody pulls MVS into a side headlock, but gets run into and bounced off of the ropes. Brody hits the opposite ropes and comes back fast, ducking a possible Hurricanrana attempt from MVS who plays it off like a leapfrog. MVS rolls backwards for a Monkey Flip as Brody rebounds but dives over him and rolls forward finishing back on his feet as MVS makes it back onto his. MVS charges in and Brody turns around just in time to maintain control with an Armdrag. He locks Siclen’s arm under his own in an Armlock with his knee in the side of Siclen’s head for added discomfort.

 

“Van Siclen is back where he doesn’t want to be and that is in any of those submissions or holds. He’s healed up fairly well since the attack but you can tell that it still pains him,” Axis finishes as Brody takes his knee off of MVS and pulls him to his feet with the arm before backing him into the ropes and sending him across the ring with a whip. “Irish Whip by Brody,” Axis calls the action as MVS rebounds. “Spinning Heelkick by Brody floors the ex-champ and Brody makes the first cover of the match-up... One! T-No! Just a hint of a two.” Brody stands and puts the boots to MVS with a few stomps. He goes to roll out of the ring but Brody halts him and pulls him back before lowering a knee down across his throat, using the ropes to pull himself down as the official tries to intervene in vein and the fans feed him with boos.

 

The referee steps back and starts the DQ count. Waiting to the lost moment, Brody releases MVS who gasps for air on the apron with Melissa trying to help in any way. Brody turns to the official, proud with his false authority. Brody confronts the smaller man and looms over him. The referee looks into Brody’s eyes and scatters... pitiful. Brody turns back to MVS who’s now standing with his back braced against the ropes and Melissa cheering him at ringside. Brody charges to MVS but gets back dropped over the ropes, landing on the apron. MVS turns, thinking Brody’s on the floor, and blocks a punch then repaying Brody with one of his own. Brody staggers down the apron as MVS springboards off of the top turnbuckle pad and takes Brody off the apron. “A Springboard Dropkick gives Van Siclen the break he needed,” notes Axis, as Melissa makes sure to distance herself from the sadist.

 

Brody regains his bearings as MVS takes this bought time to recover. Brody is back on his feet shortly and looks to the ring crew to claim a steel folding chair. He does surely does after showing some hard worker out of his seat, but unknown to Brody, MVS hath slid out of the ring and stalks Brody from behind. Brody turns to find MVS and little more—a Van Siclenator! The chair bounces off of Brody’s face and goes flying. “I’m sure not taking Brody’s side here but that clearly wasn’t legal. What do you call it, the Greco-Roman Chair Shot?” Axis is answered with, “I call it self defense.” Axis replies, “This is a wrestling match, Edwin...” MVS peels Brody off of the thin black mats and rolls him in the ring. He turns to the fans and raises his arms before pointing... Mike... Van... Siclen. He doesn’t even have to say it as the fans cheer his name.

 

MVS slides into the ring and crawls into a lateral press on Brody as the official drops down. One... Two—Shoulder up by Brody. MVS stands and pulls Brody to his feet with a fistful of Brody’s black braids before leading him to the corner with a slam. “Brody’s face, meet the top turnbuckle pad. Top turnbuckle pad, vise versa,” Edwin adds his special something in ring action. MVS scores a kick to the midsection and then an unanswered whip, sending Brody speeding to the opposite corner with MVS at his heels. Brody plants his hands on the turnbuckles, making his momentum carry his legs up and landing on MVS’ shoulders in the head-scissors. MVS catches Brody’s legs with his hands and throws him off... “Ouch!” Edwin winces, “Brody landing in a very painful position on the top rope!”

 

Brody falls off the ropes and back into the ring, favoring his ‘bits ‘n pieces’ as some laugh, mainly that sum-un-a-bitch, MVS. MVS pulls Brody back up after the laugh and presses him into the ropes... Irish Whip—reversed, surprisingly. MVS hits the ropes and bounds back as Brody braces himself against the ropes, still feeling the pain. He sees MVS and tries to straighten up as best as he can. MVS hops up, giving the Hurricanrana a second try but gets caught a planted in a weak powerbomb from the recovering Brody. Brody wastes no time in stepping out onto the apron where he grabs the top rope and vaults back in, extending his body as if in a pose before flipping over and landing on MVS with finesse. “Slingshot Senton Atomico!” Edwin has to give it props. Brody turns over and hooks the leg...

 

One!

 

Two!

 

“...And Siclen kicks out!” Brody stands and backs up a step, letting MVS onto his feet. When to a knee, Brody seizes the opportunity and drills MVS with a “smack”-ing kick to the ribs. MVS feels it and grits his teeth as Brody pulls him the rest of the way to his feet and backs him into the corner. “Smack!” Brody raises a welt on the ex-champ’s chest... “Smack!” It now has a twin. “Brody is reddening MVS’ chest with those Knife-Edge Chops!” Axis announces as MVS covers his chest with his arms. Brody takes a stance before dishing out two quick roundhouse kicks two the high chest and then a bit lower, but landing on MVS’ arms. Seeing MVS block the kicks, Brody switches up his offense and synchs MVS up in an inverted facelock before depositing him on the top turnbuckle pad.

 

Brody climbs up, but getting his ears boxed causes him to drop back down. MVS grabs him by the head and jams him into a front facelock before spinning around. “Tornado DDT—no!” shouts Edwin as Brody locks his hands around MVS’ waist and lets his momentum spin him around 360 before dropping him back down onto his feet, grappling up and getting under the weight before taking MVS over his head in a Northern Lights Suplex.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

“MVS gets the shoulder up!” MVS breaks Brody’s bridge and rolls out of the pinning combination. Brody is first to his feet, followed shortly there after by his adversary. Brody synchs him back up in another inverted facelock and hooks MVS’ tights with his free hand. With a quick stomp, Brody takes him over in a Snap Suplex, floating over into the lateral press with his forearm grinding into MVS’ cheekbone, adding to the cover.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

“MVS kicks out at two!” Axis calls, “Smart wrestling by Brody, keeping the pressure on.” Brody gets back onto his feet and pulls MVS up by his head. He turns his back to MVS and drops to a knee, taking him over with a Snapmare. MVS sits up as Brody stands. He measures the distance and... “Smack!” Brody delivers a kick to the small of MVS’ back! “Spinal Tap!” shouts Edwin as MVS writhes in pain. Brody grabs MVS’ by the head and pulls it back down to lay flat before he back-peddles into the ropes and rebounds, coming of the ropes with a Knee Drop grinding on MVS’ forehead. He tries to sit back up in pain but is pushed back down with his leg hooked.

 

One!

 

Two!

 

“And no!” Edwin cheers, “Van Siclen is showing some great resilience here.” Brody stands up visibly frustrated as he gets the in face of the easily intimidated official. Brody backs the man in the stripes up into the corner as MVS takes his free time to try to recover with Melissa supporting him in any way she can. Brody looms over the official, afraid in the corner. Brody’s demeanor changes to a grin as he eyes the pathetic creature before him. He doesn’t fulfill his sadistic temptations, but turns away and heads back to MVS, now standing against the ropes.

 

Brody takes hold of MVS’ arm and hits a successful whip to the opposite ropes. MVS rebounds and comes back, getting caught up in the air with a Tilt-a-Whirl by Brody who presents the knee for the Backbreaker, but MVS counters with an Armdrag, slinging Brody halfway across the ring. “Beautiful counter of the Tilt-a-Whirl Backbreaker with the Armdrag!” calls Edwin as both men race but up to their feet, MVS with the chase to capitalize and make a comeback. MVS swings an eager Clothesline... ducked and Brody tries to synch him up. “Brody’s going for the T-Bone Suplex...” Axis announces, but MVS frees himself, “No! Van Siclen battles out with a few elbows to the head!”

 

Brody staggers back, holding the side of his head, as MVS swings a right hand... ducked! Brody grabs that arm and then the other, locking MVS into dual armbars before lifting him up for the Tiger Suplex... MVS rolls forward, breaking his arms free and hooking his heels under Brody’s arms, rolling him up into a Legs Clutch. MVS hooks Brody’s legs with adrenaline coursing through his veins...

 

One!

 

Two!

 

Brody rolls backwards, pinning MVS in the position. Brody reaches back and snags the second rope with his hand, unseen by the official...

 

One!

 

Two!

 

...And MVS kicks out after the brief period of suspense. The referee backs away off into the corner as Brody makes it back onto his feet. Keeping his distance, the official signals a two-count as Brody closes in. Face-to-face, Brody confronts him once more... Brody turns just in time to dodge a Splash by MVS. The official crumples to the ground and rolls out of the ring as Brody goes to work on MVS in the corner with a few hard chops. After the third welt-raising strike, Brody takes MVS by the hand and whips him out of the corner—reversal and Brody is sent to the ropes. Brody rebounds off the ropes and MVS lowers his head, but gets jammed into a standing head-scissors. Brody hooks the arms...

 

“THE DESCENT!” shouts Edwin, “NO! Van Siclen counters!” Brody releases MVS’ arms as he straights up and hooks Brody by the backs of his knees, holding him on his back. MVS pauses for a moment and then sits out, spiking Brody’s head in the canvas. “VAN SLAMINATOR!” Edwin yells as Brody bounces up and lands face down on the canvas next to MVS. MVS stands up and adjusts Brody into position before heading to the corner and springing to the top turnbuckle pad with a half twist, now facing Brody... “BULLFROG SPLASH!!” yells Edwin as MVS makes the cover, “He hooks the leg, but the referee is still out!” MVS feels the title back in his grasp until he looks around and doesn’t spot the man in the striped shirt.

 

MVS stands up and visibly asks, “What the hell?” He looks around for the referee and finds Melissa, pointing to the side of the ring. MVS reaches through the ropes to the groggy man below, but is grabbed form behind by a weary Shawn Brody. MVS turns and knocks Brody’s away and clutches his head before sitting out in a Jawbreaker. The stunned Brody stumbles back into the ropes at his side, holding his jaw as MVS gets back onto his feet. Two punches later, MVS takes Brody’s hand for a whip—reversed and MVS is sent across the ring. Brody ducks his head down as MVS hits the ropes for the Back Drop but MVS reads the telegraph and catches Brody with a Swinging Neckbreaker.

 

“Van Siclen is making a comeback,” notes Axis as the two men get back onto their feet. MVS shoves Brody into the ropes and stuns him with a Forearm Smash before hitting a successful Whip, sending Brody across the ring. Brody hits the ropes and comes back as MVS charges forward. Brody swings a sloppy Clothesline—ducked and they continue to the ropes ahead. After rebounding, they run back at one another... Spear! MVS rolls out with his momentum and hits the ropes, rebounds and drops an elbow across Brody’s sternum. MVS quickly gets back onto his feet and drops another elbow. MVS gets up as Melissa finally wakes the official and helps him into the ring. MVS turns back to Brody, standing on weak legs.

 

Brody charges in, swinging a sloppy clothesline—ducked and MVS locks in a half nelson and finally, he brings his other hand around Brody’s neck before falling onto his back in a Kataha-jime or Half Nelson Chokehold. The official asks Brody if he will give up, but no. Brody tries to fight the hold. He pulls at MVS’ choking hand to no avail and soon his efforts slow to weak struggling. Feeling Brody’s consciousness slip away, MVS wraps his legs around Brody in a body-scissors. The official raises Brody’s arm once... it falls back to the canvas. He repeats... BAM, the official falls to the canvas after a shot to the back of the head from the TV title.

 

“TOM FLESHER!!” Edwin screams as the assailant stomps away on MVS, “IT’S TOM FLESHER!!” MVS releases Brody as Flesher lays in the boots on the ex-champ. MVS fights back up to his feet, plagued by stomps and kicks from the debuting rookie, still warn from his match earlier. He scores one final kick to MVS’ midsection with MVS in the ropes. The Superior One whips MVS forward—reversal and Flesher hits the ropes. He comes back fast as MVS ducks down... “VAN SLAMMINATOR!! MVS IS FIGHTING OFF TWO MEN!!” Axis yells as Flesher rolls out of the ring and MVS makes it back up to his feet, adrenaline flowing. He turns to Brody, now standing behind him, and eats a knee to the gut... Reverse Fireman’s Carry... Brody hooks the head...

 

“ANGEL WINGS!!!” Axis marks out after Brody plants MVS with a DDT from the Fireman’s Carry. Brody gets back onto his feet and looks to revive the official but Melissa jumps onto the apron and tries to distract Brody by getting in the ring. She places her hand on his shoulder... instantly he turns and grabs her hand, then her throat with the other. “Melissa is in the worst place possible!” shouts Axis with concern as Brody backs her into the corner. MVS struggles to his feet and makes it up after seeing Melissa in trouble. He charges in with a Spear but Brody senses it and dives to the side with Melissa, causing MVS’ shoulder to eat ring post. “This just isn’t Siclen’s day...” Edwin sighs as Brody gets back to his feet and Melissa rolls out of the ring, saved by the Clannie.

 

MVS backs out from the turnbuckles, holding his shoulder as he walks right into a standing head-scissors from Brody. The sadist hooks his arms and lifts him vertical, releasing the arms before bringing him back down in a sick Piledriver! “THE DESCENT!!” screams Axis as the half-conscious official crawls forward and slaps the canvas...

 

ONE!!

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

THREE!! The abused official can finally call for the bell and collect his paycheck.

 

“DING! DING! DING!”

 

“Brody retains!” yells Axis as Brody rolls out of the ring and snags his title belt as Funyon takes his mic. “The winner of this match and still SJL Television Champion,” Funyon takes a deep breath, “‘THE FALLEN ANGEL’ SHAWN BRODY!!” And so the booing ensues. “Shawn Brody steals another victory over Siclen with the aid of another man!” Edwin gripes, “What—What is Flesher doing?” The Superior One scoops Melissa up over his shoulder and meets Brody before heading up the entranceway. “They’re abducting Melissa!” She kicks and tries to fight as they head up the ramp. They stop at the curtains and turn to face MVS, only able to stand with the aid of the ropes. He watches as they wave goodbye.

 

“Shawn Brody has everything of Siclen now... MVS Has got nothing left to lose.”

 

Mike Van Siclen’s face... no (zoom closer), his eyes are the last image seen before fading out.

[Guest crusen86]

Axis: “Welcome back to SJL Crimson, everybody! I’m Axis joined, as usual, by the commish of the Smarks Junior League, Edwin McPhisto!”

 

Edwin: “I AM EVIL! MWAAAHAAHAA!!!”

 

Axis turns and slaps Edwin across the face.

 

Axis: “STOP IT DAMMIT!! STOP IT!!”

 

Axis regains his composure as Edwin rubs his cheek.

 

Edwin: “C’mon, Axis, can’t you take a joke?”

 

Axis: “Sorry…it’s a reflex. Well, let’s get to the action. It’s Mafia versus Ced Ordonez in the next match. Ced managed to get the upset win, pinning Mafia in the Four Corners match on Metal. Now, can Mafia even the score or is the newcomer going to dodge the Hitman’s bullet? Let’s find out now! Here’s Funyon with the ring introductions.”

 

Funyon: “Ladies and Gentleman, the following contest is scheduled for one fall! Now making his way to the ring, hailing from Denver, Colorado, weighing in at 215 pounds, MAAAAFIIIIAAAAA!”

 

"War Machine" by KISS hits as it turns dark, only with multi-colored lights flashing onto the entryway and ring. The vocals hit, and Mafia walks onto the stage into multiple spotlights, which shine from each direction. He walks straight down to the ring and the spotlights follow. At the bottom of the ramp, he slides in, immediately turns to the nearest turnbuckle and climbs up. With his arms outstretched into the crucifix, he'll spit out a dose of Black Mist into the air as the spotlights still shine. He then hops off and runs to the opposite turnbuckle, jumps up, and does the exact same motions. He steps down and waits for his opponent for the evening.

 

Funyon: “His opponent, hailing from San Jose, California…”

 

“Party Up” by DMX interrupts Funyon as Kojack, wearing his street clothes, struts out of the entranceway with a steel chair in his hand, inciting the boos of the crowd and confusing the commentary team.

 

Axis: “I did say Mafia versus Ced Ordonez, right?”

 

Edwin: [checking the match listings] “Yep, right there, ‘Mafia vs Ced Ordonez’.”

 

Axis: “Well, Kojack did a number on Ced on Metal, leaving him laying after a vicious beating.”

 

Edwin: “A chairshot, the Jack Bomb, AND the Torque definitely qualifies as a beating!”

 

Axis: “But Kojack wasn’t even scheduled to be here tonight! He’s got to have something on his mind.”

 

Kojack walks to the base of the ramp and unfolds his chair. He places in on the side near the guardrail and casually  takes a seat. Some fans attempt to pat him on the back, but he shoves them away and yells for security to move the fans away from him. “Party Up” slowly fades out and Funyon continues his ring announcer duties.

 

Funyon: “And his opponent, from San Jose, California, weighing in 191 pounds, CED OOORRRDOOONEEEZ!”

 

A thunderclap echoes throughout the area and "Storm of Ambition" blares through the speakers. The music plays for few seconds before Ced makes his way out with a towel draped around his neck. As he makes his way to the ring, he slaps the outstretched hands of fans while the entrance lights intermittently flash to give a lightning-like effect. As he makes his way to the base of the ring he notices Kojack, who gets up from his chair. He stops and only turns his head to get a good look at the man who assaulted him only a few days ago. Kojack stands his ground with an arrogant smirk on his face. Kojack extends his hand out to Ced in an act of mockery. Ced doesn’t even glance at his hand and makes his way into the ring.

 

Edwin: “Ced didn’t shake his hand?

 

Axis: “If I beat you within an inch of your life, would you shake my hand?”

 

Edwin: “Of course, I would shake your hand.”

 

Axis: [sarcastically] “Uh huh…If I beat you within an inch of your life?”

 

Edwin: “I’d even buy you a nice house.”

 

Axis: “What?!?”

 

Edwin: “Hahahah! But who are you kidding, Axis? You can hardly hurt a fly with your slaps.”

 

Axis contemplates ways to blindside McPhisto with a punch as Ordonez enters the ring and does his warm-up jog. He gets to his corner and throws his towel into the crowd. The referee does his final check of the wrestlers and signals for the match to begin.

 

**DING DING**

 

Mafia and Ced meet in the center of the ring and Ced extends his hand to Mafia while keeping an eye on Kojack. Mafia responds with a firm handshake and they lockup. Mafia backs Ordonez into the ropes and Irish whips him. Ordonez ducks a clothesline on the first crossover, but misses with his own clothesline on the return trip. Ordonez comes off the ropes again and gets caught by a hurracanrana by Mafia, who turns it into a pin attempt.

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

…Ced shifts his weight and reverse into a pin of his own!

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

Mafia kicks out and tumbles backward, but Ordonez keeps on him and places him in a front facelock. Both men get into a standing position and Mafia grabs Ced by the waist. Mafia goes for a Northern Lights Suplex, but Ordonez squats down and applies more pressure on the facelock. They stall for a little bit as Mafia holds onto Ced’s waist and Ced continues to apply the front facelock. Finally, Mafia senses Ced off-guard and hoists him overhead with a Northern Lights Suplex. He bridges and the referee counts the fall!

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

T…Ordonez kicks out of the pinning predicament. They both get back onto their feet and crack a little smile as they both know this is going to be an interesting battle.

 

Axis: “Both Mafia and Ced Ordonez are technically sound, and judging by the noise coming from this crowd, they know as well as I do that we are going to be in for a treat during this Crimson match!”

 

Edwin: “I pinned you with that move once. Remember?”

 

Axis: “No you didn’t!”

 

Edwin: “Sure I did! You probably don’t remember because I dropped you on your head. I was really worried and I took you to the hospital because you had this bad bump your head…”

 

McPhisto continues his story as Axis rolls his eyes. Meanwhile, Ced snapmares Mafia in the center of the ring. Ced bounces off the ropes and dropkicks Mafia in the knee while he tries to recover. Ced grabs Mafia’s leg and tries for the Cross Lightning, but Mafia kicks away at Ordonez as he pulls closer to the ropes. Ced catches Mafia’s leg and is about to cinch the Cross Lightning in, but Mafia grabs the bottom rope. The referee calls for the break and Ced slowly lets go of Mafia’s legs. Mafia, still holding the bottom rope, waits for Ced to release the hold. Waiting for the most opportune time, Mafia wraps his legs around the ankles of Ordonez and pulls his own upper body into the bottom rope causing Ced to lose his balance and fall flat onto his face. The crowd boos Mafia’s underhanded action as he floats over Ced and regains the advantage with a headlock.

 

Edwin: “…and that’s when the penguin waddled in and…”

 

Axis: “Edwin, are you sure you didn’t get dropped on your head?”

 

Edwin blankly stares and turns his head to one side.

 

Axis: “Bah…forget I even asked.”

 

Ced fights his way back to his feet while Mafia holds on with the headlock. They work their way to the ropes and Ced whips Mafia, but Mafia continues to retain the headlock. Ordonez struggles some more and manages to get his arms around Mafia’s waist. Ordonez lifts up Mafia and nearly dumps him on his head with a backdrop. Ordonez sees the scatterbrained expression on Mafia’s face and covers him.

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

TH…Mafia kicks out.

 

Ordonez grabs the dazed Mafia and whips him into the ropes. Ced gets a running start and leaps at Mafia with a jumping back elbow, but Mafia catches him in mid-air! Mafia does a 180-degree spin and sets a confused Ordonez back onto his feet. Ordonez can’t even react as Mafia places him into a hammerlock and hooks his other arm. Ordonez tries to keep his center of balance low in a desperation counter, but Mafia muscles him up into the air and slams Ced down onto his left shoulder.

 

Axis: “GANGLAND EXECUTION! GANGLAND EXECUTION ON CED! Ced’s shoulder is DEAD!!”

 

Ced screams in pain, clutching his newly injured shoulder, as Mafia covers him.

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

THR…NO! Ced, grasping his left shoulder, bridges out of the pin attempt.

 

Axis: “NO! Two count! Ced Ordonez is still alive in this contest!”

 

Mafia appears a bit astonished that his opponent managed to get out of the pinfall. He picks up Ordonez and applies a hammerlock causing Ced to yelp in pain. The referee asks Ordonez if he wants to submit, but he shakes his head.

 

Edwin: “Have we ever see somebody submit to a hammerlock?”

 

Axis: “Stranger things have happened, like an anklelock actually ending a match…”

 

Ced begins repeatedly back elbowing Mafia with his free arm, causing him to release the hold and stagger backwards. Ordonez spins counterclockwise and charges with a clothesline, but Mafia turns Ced around so his back is to Mafia. Mafia grabs Ordonez in an inverted facelock. He then does his own spin and drills Ordonez into the mat.

 

Axis: “PROBLEM SOLVER! IT’S OVER!

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

THREe… NO! CED KICKED OUT! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!”

 

Mafia can’t believe that Ced kicked out either and the crowd is whipped into frenzy. Mafia signals for the Mob Hit and lifts Ordonez into a standing Fireman’s Carry. He swings Ordonez around, but Ced swings out and lands on his feet. He bounds of the mat and recoils with a powerful enzigiri to the back of Mafia’s head. Mafia drops like a rock as Ced crashes onto the mat, injured shoulder first, causing him to writhe in pain. Fighting off the pain, Ordonez clenches his teeth and inches toward the fallen Mafia. Ordonez lies on top of him and the referee begins slapping the mat.

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

THR…NO! Mafia gets the shoulder up!

 

Ced gets back to his feet and stumbles to the ropes. Mafia groggily looks around as he stands and doesn’t see Ced as he fires off another enzigiri, this time landing on his right side. Mafia falls to his hands and knees as Ordonez measures him up, compensating for height. As soon as Mafia’s head comes up, Ced comes at him again with yet another enzigiri! Mafia crumples and Ced pins him.

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

THReeeee…NO!!! Mafia barely manages to raise his shoulder off the mat.

 

Axis: “Mafia miraculously kicks out!”

 

Edwin: “Domo arigato, Mr. Roboto!”

 

Axis: “Eh? Come again?”

 

Ced looks up in shock, holding up three fingers. The referee shakes his head vigorously and holds up two. Ordonez picks up Mafia and grabs him into Final Surge position. Ordonez catches a breather allowing Mafia to realize what is about to happen. Mafia takes a hold of Ced’s arm and falls backward, reversing the Final Surge attempt into the Downward Spiral! Ordonez pops right back up onto his knees, but his eyes cross as he flops right back down face-first.

 

Axis: “Downward Spiral by Mafia! What a counter! Both men are down! The referee checking on both men and he’s starting the ten count.”

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

THREE!

 

FOUR! Neither Ced nor Mafia has moved from their occupied position on the mat. The crowd is going ballistic hoping somebody gets up in this heated matchup.

 

FIVE!

 

SIX! Ced starts crawling to the ropes in one direction and Mafia crawls in the other direction.

 

SEVEN!

 

EIGHT!

 

NINE! They both start pulling themselves up with the aide of the ropes and the referee stops his count.

 

Edwin: “Look at the faces of both wrestlers! I’m not sure there’s anything left in either of them!”

 

Axis: “Kojack, on the other hand, has actually just sat there at the ramp and watched.”

 

Edwin: “I don’t blame him. Two guys whipping each other’s ass is a very entertaining thing to behold.”

 

Both men stumble backwards into each other. Startled, they both swing around and connect with right hands. The two struggle to keep their balance from the blow, and Ced recovers first with a right-handed knife edge chop. Mafia responds with one of his own and adds an extra one. Ordonez fires off a signature roundhouse kick to Mafia’s left leg. Not pleased, Mafia grabs a hold of Ced’s leg when he goes for another roundhouse. Ced jumps up for an enzigiri, but Mafia ducks the concussion-inducing kick. Ordonez falls onto his stomach and Mafia, still holding Ced’s leg, segues into a single leg crab. Ordonez pulls himself towards the ropes only to have Mafia pull him back to the center of the ring and changes up into an armbar onto Ced’s left arm! The referee checks for the tap-out, but Ordonez refuses to tap. Mafia starts cranking hard on the arm, moving the pressure towards Ced’s shoulder. Ordonez starts pulling to the ropes with everything but the kitchen sink and his injured shoulder. Screaming, he inches ever so closer to the ropes. He finally gets himself into the ropes and Mafia is forced to let go by the referee’s demand. Sensing both of them are running out of gas quickly, Mafia brings Ced up one more time. He thinks of picking Ordonez up for a Mob Hit, but in the instant Mafia has this thought, Ced has one of his own. He grasps a hold of Mafia with his right arm and lifts his right leg up. He pulls it down to sweep Mafia off his feet and falls forward to slam him down with the Final Surge. Neither man moves as the referee notices that Ced’s arm is draped over Mafia and counts the fall.

 

 

ONE…

 

 

TWO…

 

 

THREE! Ced gets the fall and the victory!

 

Funyon: “Ladies and gentlemen, the winner by pinfall, CED ORDONEZ!”

 

“Storm of Ambition” plays once again. The crowd applauds the efforts of both men as Ced and Mafia both lie on the ground in the same pinning position.

 

Axis: “What a battle this turned out to be! Both men giving it their all and I think everyone that witnessed this match enjoyed every minute of it.”

 

Kojack gets out of his chair with the same smirk he brought with him and rolls into the ring. He stalks Ced, who has just managed to roll onto his back, still exhausted. Kojack mounts Ced and looks him directly in the face before slapping Ordonez hard across the face. Kojack begins yelling at Ordonez and slaps him once again before rolling back out of the ring. The crowd engulfs him in boos as he grabs his chair and walks to the back.

 

Edwin: “Ever get the feeling Kojack doesn’t like Ced?”

 

Axis: “Kojack demands respect from Ced, but I’m not sure that’s the way to get it!”

 

Edwin: “But I think Ced now knows that Kojack will stop at nothing for that respect.”

 

Ced sits up and looks to the entranceway at the exiting Kojack. Ced mouths the word “respect” as he obviously looks pissed. The shot of Ced’s disgusted face fades and as another commercial break begins.

[Guest crusen86]

Jumping back from commercial, the roar of the crowd is omnipresent as the camera pans to the inside of a large arena in Adelaide, Australia, the flashing "SJL CRIMSON-SOLD OUT!" sign on the marquee outside signifying it as the Adelaide Entertainment Center, setting for tonight’s SJL event… SJL Crimson! The shot then goes inside the arena, the crowd on their feet as they anticipate SJL Crimson’s next live match! The camera cuts back from blackness into a shot of the arena. Decked out in JL gear, each fan joins in, but some carry signs, waving them in an attempt to get on TV. The few that do read "Poke-freaks of Adelaide!" with an arrow or two pointing down to several Ash fans, "SO SAYS THE CLAN!!!" "Beware the scoop slam of DOOM!!!" "LOW BRASS KICKED MY ASS!!!" and the mandatory "What?" sign or two. The camera continues to pan the arena of happy fans, then cuts to the announcers table, where Axis, , and Edwin sit smiling, though we can only see Axis. The mandatory stuffed panda is placed next to the Panda Wrangler’s monitor.

 

Axis: …And welcome back to SJL Metal, live from Brisbane!!! As usual, Axis here, joined by Edwin MacPhisto-

 

The camera pans to Edwin, sitting their, hands interfolded on the table, staring… smiling. Freakishly smiling. He’s obviously ecstatic about something… but what?

 

Axis: What the hell’s wrong with you? Smoke a little to much funky grass?

 

Edwin: No… just the upcoming match is SO EXCITING!!!

 

Edwin grabs Axis by the shoulders and shakes him in his excitement. Axis breaks free of the hold, brushing himself off and looking at Edwin out of the corner of his eye.

 

Axis: That’s enough of that… however, next on Crimson, we kick it into full gear as it’s an XF9 CIVIL WAR!!! Low Brass takes on Ash Ketchum, a shot versus Erek Taylor for the rights to a SWF contract on the line!!!!

 

Just then Axis is cut off as the lights go out, the sold-out Adelaide crowd rising to its feet.

 

Edwin: YES!!!!

 

Axis: One more match after this…

 

Just then, the beginning of U2’s "Elevation" begins to play, the part at the beginning pumping the crowd up as a waterfall of pyro flows over the SmarkTron and shoots up in front of the entrance, like Christian’s entrance. But then, as the first words begin, the pyro in front of the entrance stops, a spotlight shining onto the stage, shining off Ash, who is in a Jericho-like pose. The crowd pops like there’s no tomorrow as the see the Poke Freak, shiny Tag Title clutched in his left hand. Misty is on his left side, wearing a sexy pink string bikini, her hair pulled back into it’s usual ponytail on the left side with a pink scrunchie, gold chain ankle bracelet on her left ankle, her arms on her hips smiling as Ash spins around from his Jericho pose and walks halfway down the ramp. Stopping his walking, Ash brings his right arm up straight in the air quickly and makes his signature split-finger victory sign with his right hand. At this point, five red pyro blasts shoot up from the stage in unison, right where the original pyro was. Ash and Misty release themselves from their poses and go down to ringside, Ash slapping hands with the fans and getting pumped up as a video of clips from his best IGNWF, JL, and ML matches plays on the SmarkTron.

 

Funyon: The following match is scheduled for one-fall and a win in the SWF CONTRACT TOURNAMENT!!! Introducing first… being accompanied by Misty, from Pallet Town.. weighing in at 255 pounds… he is a member of the SJL TAG/STABLES CHAMPIONS, X FORCE NINE… ASH KET-CHUMMMMMMMM!!!!!

 

He climbs up onto the apron, throws his Tag Title Belt in, opens the ropes to let Misty in, then climbs in himself, removing his Jeff Jarrett-style sunglasses. Ash climbs the turnbuckle closest to the crowd and usually takes off his shirt, whipping it into the first two or three rows of the crowd, giving a lucky fan a souvenir to take home. Ash then hops off the turnbuckle as Misty poses next to him in a cute and sexy pose that drives the guys wild! A twelve year old Aussie Ash fangirl-in-training, front row, catches it, and she jumps up and down in excitement, happy to have something of her idol’s. Ash turns back around as the crowd chants his name, almost deafening in amplitude …

 

Crowd: ASH!!! ASH!!! ASH!!! ASH!!!

 

Edwin: I wish more wrestlers gave back to the fans like Ash…

 

Axis: Yeah… but who wants a sweaty shirt?

 

Edwin: It’s free, isn’t it? Free is good…

 

Axis: Hmmmm… lemme think… not if it’s from you…

 

Suddenly, "Elevation" cuts out as the arena goes green.. DX green. X-Pac entering? God forbid that. Blarg. Instead, "Brass Monkey" by The Beastie Boys kicks up, the lights flashing in the arena on each saxophone note in the beginning. As The Beastie Boys and the crowd yells out "Brass Monkey!" the first time, Brass pops out from behind the curtain, the lights returning to normal. Equipped with a green denim jacket, his name embroidered on the back, Low Brass, wearing Too Cool-like sunglasses with a green border, Brass stands on stage and does his Ozzy Osbourne salute. The former Black Sabbath frontman would be quite proud of Brass, but Brass begins to walk down the ramp, Funyon raising a mic to his lips once more:

 

Funyon: And his opponent, from Redmond, Washington, weighing in at 233 pounds, he is one member of the SJL TAG/STABLES CHAMPIONS X FORCE NINE… LOW BRAAASSSSSSSSSSSS!!!

 

Walking down to the ring and entering the stage, he stands in the center of the ring, poised there as a green spotlight envelops him. Looking at the crowd, Brass breaks out into the Low Brass dance, driving the Aussies wild!!!!

 

Axis: Whatever happens, XF9 will lose a member! This match’s winner faces fellow XF9er Erek Taylor!!!

 

Edwin: Well… they’ve probably gone looking for new talent to replace whoever they will lose… so I wouldn’t be concerned.

 

Axis: An actual comment from you that makes sense, Edwin?

 

Edwin: Huh?

 

As the lights come up, the timekeeper reaches over the table, and…

 

 

DING DING DING!!!

 

The match begins, Brass and Ash closing in on each other, drawing their arms back and they entangle them in a grapple. Both men fight for control, but with a  swift knee to the chest, Brass wins out, grabbing Ash around the head for a quick headlock. However, placing both hands on Brass’ back, Ash pushes out of Brass’ headlock and pushes Brass to the ropes. LB bounces off them, headed back at Ash, who extends his right shoulder out and knocks Brass down with a  shoulder block. Ash  quickly runs to his right, bouncing off the ropes as Brass gets onto his feet. Ash extends his arm out as he charges back at Brass, knocking Brass down with a simple clothesline!

 

Axis: Lariat from Ash!!!

 

Edwin: Clothesline.

 

Once again, Brass falls to the mat and gets back up, and once more, Ash heads to the ropes, bouncing off them. As he files back at Brass, Brass turns his back to Ash, dropping to a knee, and grabbing Ash around the head, flips Ash over his shoulder and onto his BUTT with an Irish whip snapmare, it seems. Ash lands on the mat, and almost instantly, Brass locks in a reverse chinlock.

 

Axis: Same difference.

 

Edwin: Clothesline.

 

As Brass tightens his muscles, yet again Ash sits there, blank expression on his face as he looks down at an imaginary watch. The crowd cheers, Edwin erupting in laughter, but Brass shuts them up, tightening the hold again. This time, Ash’s expression changes to one of a man shocked and gasping for air, Ash slowly trying to get up as Brass continues the hold. Actually, more like Brass helps Ash to get up, Brass trying to pull Ash up as he tries to get up.

 

Axis: He’s hurting now!!!

 

Edwin: Blarg on that.

 

As Ash and Brass get to their feet, Ash brings his right arm forward, driving it back into Brass’ ribs with an elbow that loosens the hold. Spinning around to face Brass, Brass’ chin on Ash’s head, Ketchum grabs Brass behind the head and falls into a sitting position, falling into a sit-down jawbreaker that, upon releasing Brass, causes LB to dramatically bounce back and fall onto his back! As Brass lays there, Ash quickly covers him, hooking his leg as he leaps on top of him for the match’s first pin attempt…

 

One… Brass kicks out before two! The pin is releases and both men make a speedy recovery, barely beaten yet.

 

Edwin: PANDARIFIC JAWBREAKER FROM ASH!!! WOOOOO!!

 

Axis: I’ll give you a quarter to shut up the rest of the match.

 

Edwin: OK…

 

As Axis reaches into his pocket and throws Edwin a quarter, Ash grabs Brass by the shoulders, leaping up onto them, and wrapping his legs around Brass’ neck, Ash flips back, flipping Brass into hurracanrana! Ash lands on his knees as Brass is slammed on his back, but as Ash begins to get up, Brass sits up, beginning to get up again. As Brass gets onto his feet, though, Ash knees Brass in the chest, causing him to bend over, and grabbing Brass around the head, swings one way and then the other, spinning Brass into a swinging neckbreaker that plants him on the mat!

 

Axis: Swinging neckbreaker from Ash Ketchum!!!

 

Meanwhile, Edwin is distracted by the shiny new quarter.

 

Edwin: Shi-nyyyyyy… ahhhhh…

 

As Brass hits the mat, Ketchum sits up, beginning to get up. Ash gets onto his knees, eventually getting onto his feet, but running back to the ropes. As Ash bounces off them, he charges back at Brass, doing  a front somersault that rolls him onto his feet right next to Brass. Leaping into the air, Ash coils and uncoils his arms, flying at Brass with a rolling five-star frog splash, slamming right on top of Brass, but he remains on top of him, controlling the move’s recoil as the ref drops to the mat to make the count…

 

One…

 

Tw-nope! Brass gets the shoulder up!! The crowd is confused who to cheer for… so they cheer for both men as they get up, Brass getting up slower as Ash thrusts his leg out for kick, but Brass catches it!!!

 

Axis: Ash is on the offensive here!!!

 

Edwin: That’s a good thing… I think…

 

Axis: Give me my quarter back.

 

As Ash hops on one foot, he leaps off it, flipping up as he swings that foot around for a frontflip enziguri, but Brass ducks it, slamming Ash’s back into the mat to counter, similar to LDP’s Longdogger Denial, but Brass, still holding onto the leg, turns Ash over, grabbing his other leg and pulling both of them back into a Boston crab! Ash cries in pain as he attempts to break free of the hold.

 

Edwin: Why?

 

Axis: You didn’t shut up!!!!

 

As Brass tightens the hold, Ash tries a desperation maneuver. Scooting back toward Brass, he gains a few inches to move his leg around, and with that extra space, he pushes his foot back, kicking Brass in the face and causing him to release the hold and allowing Ash to pull his legs away from Brass as he tries to get up, getting up slowly as his legs are sore. Meanwhile, Brass gets up, lunging his arm forward into a punch, but Ash catches it, spinning Brass’ arm around and wrenching it as he ducks down and slides Brass onto his shoulders, Hooking Brass’ leg, Ash begins to fall back into an Angleslam, the Pikaslam, but Brass breaks free of the leg grapple, sliding behind Ash, his arm still being held by Ketchum.

 

Edwin: Nope. You gave it to me.

 

Axis: Damn!! Why are you so obstinate?

 

Meanwhile, as the arm is held, Ash turns to face Brass. D'oh! Brass quickly falls to the mat, hooking Ash's arm out as he does and spins Ash, flipping him forward onto his back with an arm dragon screw! Ash retracts his arm, crying in pain as Brass quickly leaps on top of a fallen Ash, hooking his leg for the cover!

 

One…

 

Tw-Crap in a hat!!! Ash kicks out!!! The crowd once again cheers for the two men, both getting to their feet, Ash's arm in pain, but somehow, Ketchum kicks Brass in the gut, causing him to bend over forward. As Brass does, Ash grabs him around the head and neck for a guillotine choke, The Bind!

 

Edwin: TOOT-TOOT!!! Here comes the Ash train!

 

Axis: I'm not even going to comment…

However, as hope seems to fade away for Brass, he quickly waistlocks Ash with both arms, bending back as he lifts Ash up and slams Ketchum into the mat with a thundering northern lights suplex!!! However, as Ash hits the mat, Brass holds on, bridging into a pinning attempt as the ref drops to the mat to make the count…

 

One…

 

Two… Ash kicks out! The crowd once again cheers for both men as Ash and Brass separate, both men beginning to quickly recover from the move.

 

Axis: Bingo! That's what Brass needed!

 

Edwin: YAHTZEE!!!

 

Axis: No Edwin

 

Edwin: TWENTY-ONE!!!

 

Axis: Ed-winnn…

 

Edwin: KING ME!!!!

 

Axis: EDWIN!

 

Slowly, both men get to their feet. However, Brass strikes first, drawing his arm back as he spins around, lowering his arm before he drives it under Ash's chin as he spins, executing a fine spinning uppercut. Ash grabs his jaw and bends over, facing away from Brass. As Brass follows Ash and tries to grab him, Ash thrusts his right leg into Brass' face with a thrusting back kick… the Flash Kick! Brass goes down hard to the martial arts move, falling back and spinning as he lands on his back. Brass lands on his face, but he immediately starts to get up, using his hands to push himself up. Looking opportunity square in the face, Ash goes over toward Brass' head, grabbing Brass' arms and hooking them as he lifts Brass off the mat. Ash begins to pull Brass up into a double underhook suplex, but as soon as it seems Ash will fall back, he drops to a knee, dropping Brass onto his other extended knee into an underhook backbreaker, the Blastoise Backcracker! Brass yells out as he hits Ash's knee, and he falls forward onto his back grabbing it in pain as Ash gets up and moves back toward the turnbuckle.

 

Edwin: Ash is going to fly like a big flying Pokemon!!!

 

Axis: Thank you, Mr. Obvious.

 

Edwin: Not Mr. Obvious… ONVIOUS MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!!

 

Axis: Why do I put up with him?

 

Ash grabs the top rope, leaping up to it, and turning around. Facing a fallen Brass, Ash leaps off the top rope, flying through the air as he pulls his body into a sitting position as he falls, right into a top rope guillotine leg drop! But just as Ash is about to hit Brass, Brass rolls out of the way, and Ash slams tailbone first into the mat, crying in pain as he does.

 

Axis: HE MISSED!!!

 

Edwin: Ash go boom.

 

As Ash grabs his tailbone, getting up, Brass gets onto his feet. Standing up almost fully, he lines himself up with Ash as he gets up, and as luck would have it, Ash staggers forward toward Brass. Realizing he'd better do something, Brass grabs Ash by the sides and around the waist, lifting him up as for an atomic drop, but falling forward, slamming Ash into the mat with a devastating spinebuster!!! Ash slams hard into the mat, and Brass quickly rolls on top of Ash, hooking one of Ketchum's legs in the process as the ref drops to the mat to make the count…

 

One…

 

Two… NO DICE!!! Ash kicks out yet AGAIN!!! Brass can't seem to keep Ash down long enough to win yet, but as he releases Ash, Ash rolls away from him, rolling under the bottom ropes and dropping out of view as he hits the floor and crawls halfway under the ring.

 

Axis: Someone tell me what the hell Ash is doing…

 

Ketchum pulls a ladder out, but it doesn't seem like that's what he wants…

 

Edwin: He's digging for buried treasure under the ring!!!!

 

Axis: DON'T SAY THAT!!!

 

Edwin: Oh, come on. He ain't picking his nose under there... I can't imagine you'd think that…

 

As Brass takes a breather, Ash comes out from under the ring… with a steel chair. Getting up and sliding under the bottom rope, he re-enters the ring, now looking at Brass. Suddenly, as Ash gets to his feet, he runs at Brass. Throwing the steel chair at Brass, the XF9er catches it. Not the smartest idea, huh? Regardless, Ash leaps into the air, ending up sideways as he spins clockwise, extending his right leg out. The toe of his right boot hits the chair, which in turn hits Brass' face, resulting in a sideways spinning roundhouse kick called the Air Ketchum!

 

Axis: AIR KETCHUM FROM ASH KETCHUM!!!

 

Edwin: Yeah. I wonder how he got the name…

 

Brass drops to the mat, dropping the chair to his side as Ash slowly pushes himself up, recovering from the vicious kick.

 

Axis: IT'S HIS LAST NAME, YOU DOLTHEAD!!!

 

As Ash gets up, he bends over, grabbing the steel chair in the process as Brass, grabbing his face, slowly gets up, seemingly in a daze. Bringing the chair over his head, Ash prepares to smash it on top of Brass' head, but in a shocking turn of events, Brass lunges at Ash quickly, catching him as he takes a few steps forward and severely tackles Ash into the mat with an amazing spear!!! Ash drops the chair as his back is slammed once more into the mat, and he begins to cry in pain as Brass remains on top of him, effectively  covering him for the count it seems…

 

One…

 

Two…

 

TH-SO CLOSE, BUT NO CIGAR!!! Ash musters up the strength to kick out of the move, and the crowd once more cheers on both men, separate "Ash!" and "Brass!" chants, intermixed with a huge "X FORCE NINE!!!" chant!

 

Axis: The crowd is really into this match-up!

 

Edwin: X FORCE NINE! X FORCE NINE!!

 

Axis sighs, but at the same time, Brass and Ash slowly get up to their feet. Now up totally, Brass reaches out, grabbing Ash's right arm with his left and pulling him closer. With his right hand, he begins to deliver a set of mini-chops to Ash's neck, each one producing a short "Wooo!" from the crowd until the final one, a harder chop what pulls a longer such response from the crowd. But Brass doesn't let go of the hand, and in one motion, whips Ash to the ropes, which stretch under his weight before contracting. As Ash flies back at Brass, LB lines himself up, extends his arms out, and dips down toward Ash, scooping Ash up across his chest as he spins and falls to the mat. Brass slams Ash hard into the mat with an Irish whip powerslam, the move squashing Ash’s back. Releasing Ash’s body, Low Brass gets onto his knees, eventually getting onto his feet, but Brass bends over, grabbing Ash and pulling him up onto his feet.

 

Edwin: What devilish deed does Low Bras have in store for Ash? Will our hero make it out alive? TUNE IN NEXT WEEK ON SJL CRIMSON TO FIND OUT!!!!

 

Axis: What the hell did you just say????

 

Edwin: I'm adding PANDARIFIC drama in PANDA-VISION!!!!!

 

Axis: Dear God… if anyone out there needs an announcer/wrestler… take him. Please.

 

Moving beside Ash, Brass hooks his left leg with Ash's right, placing his left arm behind Ash's back and setting Ash up for a Russian leg sweep! But in a twist of fate, Ash breaks out Brass' grasp, and grabbing Brass under the arms, hooks them into a full nelson! Leaning forward, Ash falls back, both men slamming into the mat with a full nelson Russian leg sweep!!!!

 

Axis: Look at that! Rock, Paper Scissors!!! Spectacular counter from Ash!

 

Edwin: When I play Rock, Paper, Scissors, I throw Panda.

 

Axis: YOU CAN'T THROW PANDA!!!!!!

 

Edwin: OK, OK… is M16 rifle fine?

 

As Brass lays there, exhausted, Ash grabs Brass, pulling him up, and throws Brass into the nearest turnbuckle. Brass slams into the turnbuckle, falling down into a sitting position as Ash signals to Misty, who hands him the ladder from before. Grabbing the ladder Ash wishbones Brass' legs, placing the ladder in between Brass' legs, lined up right with his crotch. He pushes the cold, hard steel top of the ladder up there against Brass' groin, the ladder lying on it's side as Ash backs off, lining himself up with the vertical bottom rung of the ladder.

 

Edwin: Ash Ketchum is a master of innovation! He's more like RVD than Mike Van Slicen!!!!

 

Axis: Good point… The Master of the Gimmick Match is about to "sterilize" Brass!!!

 

Backing off, Ash takes off, leaping forward, almost sliding as he extends his feet out, twisting into a running missile dropkick onto the ladder, driving the ladder into Brass' groin!!! Brass' eyes bulge out as he screams like a schoolgirl, grabbing his balls and falling over to the side, grimacing and screaming in pain.

 

Edwin: OUCH! Someone better all the "med-dick"!!! GET IT???

 

Axis: You are SO immature…

 

As all this goes on, Ash moves back toward LB, grabbing him and pulling him onto his feet. Brass is still hurting from the move, but Ash doesn't care. Very quickly, Ash spins around and brings his left leg up, hooking it back as he attempts to strike LB in the face with a standing hook kick, but Brass ducks the blow and Ash spins around all the way, a full 360 degrees. Stopping in place after one spin, Ash turns to face Brass, who lunges at Ash with a punch, but Ash drops to the mat, grabbing Brass by the front of his pants as he passes over top of him. Pulling Brass back, Ash rolls on top of him, rolling Brass up into a nice roll up pin. Snazzy! the ref drops to the mat to make the count, but is this how the match is going to end? LIKE THIS???

 

One…

 

Two…

 

TH-OF COURSE NOT!!! Vince Russo isn't in the SJL! Brass kicks out, and the crowd gets more and more excited, the chants re-firing up and getting louder.

 

Edwin: The fans are loving it!! When will this insanity end? Will Axis ever get laid? TUNE IN NEXT WEEK-

 

Axis: That's enough out of you!

 

Slowly, Brass and Ash get to their feet, but ducking down. Ash draws his arm back, thrusting his right palm forward into Brass' chest, delivering a vicious palm strike to Low Brass! Brass stops in his tracks, but before he can react, Ash clenches his right hand into a fist, driving it up under the chin of Low Brass with a rising uppercut that knocks Brass back! Brass spins around, staggering back toward the ropes, and Ash grabs him by the arm, and with a tug and a push, whips him to the opposite ropes. Brass bounces off them and flies back at Ash, but as he does, he extends his arm out for a clothesline, but Ash ducks it! Brass flies toward the other ropes, bouncing off those, and as he flies back at Ash, Ash steps aside of him, clutching him across the chest, with a hand on Brass' back, and lifting Brass up, Ash slams him to the mat with a thundering Rock Bottom!

 

Axis: POKE RAP FROM ASH KETCHUM!!!

 

As Brass' back hits the mat, Ash floats over, covering him as he hooks the leg for the pin attempt!

 

One…

 

Two…

 

THREE-SORRY, TOO BAD! Brass kicks out as both men fall onto their backs.

 

Edwin: What a superb match from these two men!

 

Axis: Well, at least he's not acting dumb…

 

As Axis looks over, Edwin has two pencils hanging down out of his mouth, like a walrus.

 

Edwin: I'm a walrus!

 

Axis: I spoke too soon…

Slowly the two begin to get up, but Ash drives his knee into Brass' chest. Brass bends over forward as Ash takes a step back, stepping forward as he jumps, swinging his left leg up and down, planting it on the mat as he mimics it with his right foot, this one hitting Brass in the head! Brass falls down to the mat, face slammed into canvas thanks to a scissors kick…

 

Edwin: AIR KETCHUM DEUX!!!!

 

Axis: Yes Edwin, we know…

 

As Brass hits the mat he rolls onto his chest, perpendicular with the nearest turnbuckle. Going to that same turnbuckle, Ash leaps to the top, turning around to face Brass.

 

Edwin: Here it comes! Snorlax Splash!

 

Edwin couldn't be more right as Ash leaps off the top rope, coiling and uncoiling his arms as he flies, slamming into a stationary Brass with a five star frog splash… the Snorlax Splash! Able to control the reaction of the move, Ash remains on top of Brass, effectively pinning him to the mat!

 

One…

 

Two…

 

THREE!!!!

 

NO!!! NO WAY!!! Brass totally gets the shoulder up at the last second!!!

 

Axis: How'd he-

 

Edwin: With magic. Lots of magic!

 

As Ash gets up, he slowly gets to his feet, grabbing Brass by the arm and pulling him up in the process. As Brass gets onto his feet, Ash pulls Brass toward him, setting him up for a whip to the ropes, but Brass reverses the move, sending Ash to the ropes instead. As Ash bounces off the ropes and flies back at Brass, LB grabs Ash, lifting him up into the air, kind of like for a Rock Bottom, but suddenly, Brass slams Ash back first into the mat with a powerful Farooq-style spinebuster!!! Ash's back hits the mat and he is temporarily knocked out as Brass goes to the corner, climbing it to the top rope. As he reaches the top rope, he looks back and leaps off, falling back through the air, elbow extended as he drives it into the sternum of Ash with a flying elbow drop!

 

Axis: FLYING ELBOW DROP FROM BRASS! This could be what he needed to win!

 

Brass falls off Ash, unable to pin him, but doing some damage as Ash rolls away from Brass slowly.

 

Edwin: Maybe, but he needs to hit the Brass Monkey to do big damage!

 

Now getting up, Ash, near the ropes, is unsuspecting of Brass, who charges straight for him. Extending his arm out, Brass viciously clotheslines Ash over the top rope, Ash landing near Misty, who tries to help her boyfriend up. Meanwhile, inside the ring, Brass, seeing that Ash is being helped off takes off for the opposite ropes, bouncing off them. As Misty helps Ash up, though, Brass leaps over the top rope, hitting a suicide dive. Pushing Misty out of the way, Ash's heroism is pretty much ignored by an uncontrollable Brass, who slams into Ash, both men flying into the steel barrier surrounding the ring and slamming hard into it with a "CLANK!" and "THWACK!". Ash cries out in pain as his back is smashed against the rail, and he falls to the concrete as Brass gets off him. The crowd begins a "HOLY SH**!!!" chant.

 

Axis: OH MY GOD!!! ARE THEY DEAD????

 

Edwin: No… if they were dead, we'd be sued.

 

Axis: NO S***, DUMBA**!!!

 

Edwin: You gotta potty-mouth! Shame on you!

 

Brass, meanwhile, begins to recover, a bit shaken up from the suicide dive, but he staggers toward Ash, who is grabbing his back and screaming in pain. Bending over, Brass slowly lifts Ash to his feet, delivering a few weak punches as he does. Once Ash gets to his feet, Brass simply grabs him, half-pushing, half-whipping Ash into the steel steps at the side of the ring. The resulting "THUD!" and cry of pain from Ash makes Axis sick to his stomach, it seems.

 

Axis: Listen to the thud of Ash hitting those steps!!! It's painful to hear!

 

Edwin: So's your voice.

 

Axis: DAMMIT!!! THIS IS NOT A TIME FOR FUNNY!!!!

 

As Ash Ketchum now falls back upon the stairs to rest, Low Brass takes the offensive. Standing up again, a tired Brass pulls Ash up onto his feet, grabbing him, and slowly walks toward the timekeeper's table. The timekeeper gets out of the way as Brass climbs up onto the table, waistlocking Ash as he attempts a belly to belly suplex off that table and onto the announcer's table, but Ash counters! Ash slides Brass up onto his shoulders, and placing a leg on either side of the shiny ring bell, swings Brass over his right shoulder, Brass’ head placed between Ash’s legs as he drops into a sitting position. The result is Ash driving Brass' head into the ring bell and through the table with a devastating cradle Samoan Driver!!!! Both men slam into the mat as Brass takes the full force of the blow!!!

 

Edwin: THE TIMEKEEPER'S TABLE'S BUSTED IN HALF!! IT'S A MESS!!

 

Another "HOLY SH**!!" chant starts, but it quickly turns into an "S-J-L!!!!!!" chant, which picks up in intensity as the whole crowd gets into it.

 

Axis: Calm down, Edwin!

 

Knowing he can't pin Brass outside the ring, Ash proceeds to get up, bending over and pulling up Low Brass onto his feet. As Ash does, Brass shoves Ash into the announcer's table, Ketchum's head smacking into the table, but more importantly, the blow knocks Edwin's panda, Mr. Fuzzums, off the table. As it lands on the ground as Low Brass' feet, he kicks it away, not to disgrace Edwin, but it's in is way as he grabs Ash. Throwing Ash under the bottom rope, Brass slides under as Edwin checks on his panda friend, then begins to cry.

 

Edwin: YOU HEARTLESS B****!!! YOU HURT FUZZUMS!!!

 

As Brass climbs into the ring and Ash slowly gets to his feet, Brass wastes no time. Preempting the two STOs, because he just doesn't have the energy in him to pull them off, Brass does the Low Brass dance in front of Ash and hooks the arms of Ketchum underneath the arm pits, applying a full nelson as he lifts Ash up into the air. Brass then drops into a sitting position, slamming Ash onto his back and into the mat with a full nelson slam!!!

 

Axis: BRASS MONKEY-

 

Suddenly, Edwin leaps over the table, sliding under the ropes and into the ring to deal with the "assaulter" of Mr. Fuzzums.

 

Axis: EDWIN! GET BACK HERE!!!!

 

Ash remains down as Brass sits there, leaning forward for a pin attempt…

 

One…

 

Two..

 

 

TH-WHAT THE??? Edwin, in the ring, facing away from Brass, breaks the pin as he hooks the arms of Brass, lifting him off Ash as he slides Brass down his back and slams Brass on his head into a spiked backslide pin, the Encore Cross!!!! Edwin releases the hold then rolls toward the ropes as Brass falls to the mat.

 

Axis: EDWIN'S GONE MAD!!!! HE'S HIT THE ENCORE CROSS ON BRASS!!!

 

Edwin vacates the ring as both men, now down, lie there, out of it. The ref cannot start the count, as the no DQ rule is in effect, but time passes:

 

Five seconds… nothing much.

 

Ten seconds… the men stir about, trying to get up, it seems.

 

Twelve seconds… Ash begins to crawl toward the turnbuckle as Brass, obviously dazed, begins to sit up.

 

Fifteen seconds pass as Ash reaches the corner, slowly grabbing the ropes and pulling himself up.

 

Axis: Look at the guts of these two men!!!

 

Edwin: Damn panda abuser…

 

Axis: EDWIN!!!!! STOP THAT!!!

 

Meanwhile, tired and weak, Ash pushes himself up onto his feet, Brass grabbing his neck and slowly sitting up before staggering onto his feet, not knowing Ash has done so. Ketchum then climbs to the top rope, turning his back to Brass. As Brass turns his head up and looks toward Ash, spotting him on the ropes, Ash leaps off, twisting into a Phoenix Splash. As he flips, he positions himself so his head faces Brass, then continues the flip. When he gets near to the young high flyer, he grabs him by the neck and flips himself onto his back, flipping Ash’s buddy forward into an amazing spiked DDT! As Ash releases Brass, he falls over onto his back. Exhausted and ready to end it, Ash drapes an arm over Brass as he covers him, the ref dropping to the mat to make the count…

 

One…

 

Two…

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!!!!

 

The bell rings as Ash rolls onto his back and Misty excitedly jumps up and down while her man slowly tries to get up, sweating profusely. Funyon, outside the ring, brings the mic to his lips as the crowd cheers.

 

Funyon: Your winner… ASH KET-CHUMMMMMMMM!!!!!!!!!

 

Axis: AMAZING!!!! THIS CAN'T GET ANY BETTER!!!!

 

Edwin: Are you OK, Mr. Fuzzums???

 

Ash slowly rises onto his feet, exhausted from the battle, as Misty runs into the ring. She excitedly hugs Ash, who kisses her on the cheek. But suddenly, the lights fade out, and after five seconds of complete darkness, multi-colored lights start to flash on and off as the crowd boos loudly.

 

Edwin: No…

 

Axis: It can't be…

 

The heavy guitar intro to Metallica's "Leper Messiah" thunders from the loudspeakers as boos rain down upon the stage. Ash turns to look for the man now entering…

 

Edwin: Spider Nekura…

 

But as Spider should enter, Ash turns around as the lights come up, walking right into a patch of spewed black mist!!!! The stinging chemicals spread over the Undercard King's face as none other than the Clan Master himself, Spider Nekura stands in the ring. But as Ash turns around, *THWACK!!!!* a steel chair crashes down upon his head! During the intro, Shawn Brody, steel chair in hand, snuck in through the crowd and slid into the ring behind Ash's back! The chair drops to the side as Ash falls back, Edwin leaping once more over the announcer's table and sliding into the ring as Ash falls subconsciously back. Landing on the mat with a thud, The Clan takes off, the deed at hand done, turning to face Edwin as he helps an attacked and black-faced Ash up. Ketchum is unable to even look at the faces of his attackers as a heated war of words is exchanged between the two different groups.

 

Axis: The Clan strikes again, and this time, Ash Ketchum is the victim! Speaking of The Clan, next up, World Champion and Clansman K-Os faces Flexxx in a hell in a cell match for the right to s WF Contract shot, right here on SJL Metal… but my God… what a hideous act… those b*****ds. (Axis looks of camera.) Can we get a medic down here??? Now?

 

The camera then begins to fade away from the shot of Edwin helping up Ash into a commercial for "SJL Down Under!!!!"'s final show…

[Guest crusen86]

[standing in line for a simple box of popcorn in the outer ring of the Adelaide Entertainment Centre, little Billy gets worried as the gigantic line slowly shrinks in side.  Balancing a drink tray in one hand, and various swag from the souvenir booth in the other, he finally reaches the front.  Quickly placing his order, he looks around impatiently, knowing the show could restart any second.  Grabbing his purchase, Billy bolts through the crowd, weaving his way through the crowd when an explosion of cheers emanates from the inside of the arena.  Cursing his luck, Billy’s runs full speed as he finds the correct entrance, and flies up the stairs as fast as he can.  From the house speakers, the Crimson theme blasts forth, signifying the return from commercial.  Panning the seats, he sees the familiar face of his father.  Finally back to his seat, Billy plops down and smiles at his dad as Funyon stands up from his chair on the outside, and two referees come down to ringside.  Whipping out the program, the two wrestling buffs draw their fingers down the card, coming to a rest on the present match.  With a coy look to each other, they both turn their gazes upwards, to a web of steel hanging from the rafters.  Down by the ring, a cameraman rushes in front of the announcer’s table, taking his position and focusing on Axis and Edwin.  Behind Axis is a man who looks strangely familiar, but has his face partially covered with the hood of his jacket.]

 

Axis: “Welcome back to SJL Crimson!!  This has been a stellar night if I do say so myself.”

Edwin: “But......... you’d say that even if I booked midgets in a nightstick on a pole match where neither one could reach the nightstick.  It says you have to in your contract right?”  

Axis: [Pulls at the collar of his shirt]  “Uh........heh...........anyways, we’ve had two newbies enter mortal combat for the first time, witnessed a ferocious battle for TV Gold between Brody and MVS, and watched another chapter in this WF contract tournament unfold!”

Edwin: “On to Chapter 24 - Old Rivalry Renewed!!”

Axis: “Um, indeed.  Our next match is one that many have looked forward to for many a month.  In 2001, these two men - Flexxx and K-Os, engaged in one of the most heated TV Title rivalries to date!  Their epic Best of Three Matches series lead up to a hellacious weapons match at Code Red last October for the TV title!”

Edwin: “Unfortunately, I missed all the fun.  Fortunately, my booking skills are above average!  Thusly, the way the tournament cookie has crumbled, I’ve got a doozy of a match for your viewing enjoyment!  Plus, I can see what all this brew-ha-ha is about........”

Axis: “Not only will K-Os and Flexxx renew their feud, not only will it be for all the marbles, the marbles being a spot in the finals of the tournament against the diabolical Lady Red................”

Edwin: “It’s a flippin’ HECK IN A CELL MATCH!!!  Kiyahahaha!!”

Axis: “Nicely put.  In fact, this thing should be going down soo............”

 

[in mid-sentence, the house lights suddenly cut out, cutting off Axis in the process!  The crowd, little Billy and his father included, bolt to their feet and begin to cheer as thin, white strobe lights shoot into the rafters, reflecting off the steel and chainlink!  Every lighter in the arena is raised in the air, each one a lone star in the darkness, together a spectacle unlike any other.  As a slow, pulsing beat radiates from the speakers, the lights begin to flash faster, with more intensity, as the tempo quickens.  Ever so slowly, the cable system unwinds, lowering the gigantic cage to the ground.]

 

Edwin: “Oh my...................”

Axis: “These men are not only familiar with each other quite well, but they also know the brutality of this kind of match.  Their cage match was one not to be forgot.”

 

[As the arena is immersed in cheers, the cell nears a dozen feet from the floor.  With some last words to the second referee, the head honcho dives into the ring and watches silently as the metallic structure inches to the ground, encircling the entire ring.  Once the bottom girders come to a rest on the rubber mats surrounding the ring, the spotlights swarm over the structure.  The mixture of darkness and light, the ominous shape and awe-inspiring size of the cell send a shiver down the spine of all those in attendance, and also two wrestlers waiting in the back.  The steady beat reaching a crescendo, the sound quickly cuts off as the house lights kick back on, causing a MASSIVE pop from the crowd!  On the outside, the second ref walks around the cell, checking all the panels of chainlink.]

 

Axis: “Both men will enter, and upon that time, the door to the cell shall be locked.  No one enters, no one leaves until one man’s hand is raised in victory.”

Edwin: [is hit in the head with a kernel of popcorn]  “What the?........”

Axis: “Oh hush.  Can’t you feel the energy in this arena?  The roof is about to be blown off here.......”

Edwin: “But Axis........”

Axis: “For once....... please zip it.”

Edwin: [Pouts]

 

[On the outside of the cell, right next to the announcing table, Funyon gets out of his chair.  Just as he is about to speak, another kernel of popcorn comes flying from the crowd and decks him in the head.]

 

Funyon: “What the?................ *shrugs*............... this following match is part of the WF Contract Tournament......... and is a HELL IN A CELL MATCH!!”

 

[before the man can even finish speaking, the crowd’s roar drowns out the P.A system!  Regrouping, Funyon adjusts his bow-tie and wets his lips.]

 

Funyon: “Both wrestlers shall enter the cell, which will thereafter be locked.  There are no holds barred, and this match shall be for one pinfall............. introducing first.................”

 

[The house lights dim slightly, as the Smarktron bursts to life!  Quick images of Flexx zip onscreen, a kendo shot, a Bluelight Special, a Buzzcut TKO, the crowd goes insane as a clip of a bomb appears onscreen!  From within the rafters............]

 

 

 

SSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHUUUUUUUU!!!!!

 

 

 

[A whining noise, similar to that of a firecracker pierces the air as a stream of yellow pyro races down two wires to the stage!  Upon hitting the metal grating, the split second the bomb onscreen explodes............]

 

 

BANG!! BANG!!

 

 

******BOOM******

 

[A magnificent burst of yellow pyrotechnics explodes on the stage area as Flexxx walks out from behind the curtain, to a tremendous roar from the crowd!!  “Sleep Now in the Fire” hits the speakers as Flexx executes some dazzling spinning and striking motions with his trusty kendo stick.  Content with himself, Flexxx walks down the ramp, towards the demonic structure flashing smiles at the ladies.]

 

Funyon: “Coming to the ri........ the cell, standing six feet five inches tall and weighing 267 pounds........... FLEXX-EX-EX!!!!!”

 

[The younger referee on the outside pulls open the metal doorway as Flexxx approaches the cell.  Stopping in front of it, Flexxx looks over the entire thing..........

 

then shifts a glance to the crowd.............]

 

Axis: “What must be going through his mind right now?”

Edwin: “I think Sacred’s behind us.”

Axis: “Now why would Flexxx be thinking that?”

Edwin: [shakes his head]  “Nevermind.  Besides, I think I’ve got a clue to what the Lone Star Fighter is contemplating, and if he does, he’s as batty as me!”

 

[The cogs in Flexxx’s mind turn, and he slowly begins to move towards the near side of the cell.  Jolting to a halt, Flexxx looks both refs with a smile, slides the kendo stick into his back belt loop...............

 

 

and jumps onto the side of the cell, climbing up it!  The crowd kicks back to life as Flexxx nimbly clambers up the side of it!  Grabbing a hold of the top girder, Flexxx swings a leg up and pulls himself onto the top of the cell!  Walking around, Flexxx looks out to the crowd as hundreds of camera flashes illuminate him.]

 

Edwin: “I think Funyon should try re-explaining the rules here.  Obviously, Flexxx doesn’t understand the whole “locked in a cell” concept.”

Axis: “This seems oddly familiar............”

Edwin: “Nostalgia rules!”

 

*****CRACK*****

 

[A peal of thunder slices over top of Flexxx’s music!  The lights of the arena lose all power whatsoever, immersing the fans once again in an eerie blackness.  Before anyone can raise their lighters up in the air again, an inferno of red pyros shower across the entranceway!  “Down” drowns out the echoing thunder, causing the crowd to get off their seats!  Just as K-Os slowly steps through the red blaze, a blaze of heel heat is launched at him.  With the World Title over his shoulder, K-Os walks out a bit further and comes to a stop.]

 

Funyon: “And his opponent now approaching the cell, standing six feet one inch tall and weighing 259 pounds, he is the SJL WORLD CHAMPEEN...................... KAAAAAAAA-OSS!!!!”

 

[As the final syllable is held by Funyon, K-Os pulls the belt off his shoulders, and raises it into the air...........]

 

 

******BOOM*******

 

[Causing four massive flames to erupt through the metal grating of the stage!  Continuing his walk to the cell, K-Os looks up and returns the stare received from Flexxx.  Standing near the edge, with one foot on the girder, Flexxx watches K-Os intently from twenty odd feet up.  Reaching behind his back, Flexxx pulls the kendo stick back out, spinning it around.  The crowd finally begins to die down, as K-Os walks up to the cell and looks straight up at Flexxx.  Leaning over the edge, Flexxx extends out his arm, and flexes (get it?) one finger at K-Os motioning for him to bring it.]

 

Axis: “Flexxx is beckoning for K-Os to follow him up top!”

Edwin: “I smell ratings............ and popcorn...............”

Axis: [is hit with two kernels of popcorn]  “Hey!”

 

[As Axis turns around to find the perpetrator, K-Os breaks his stare down with Flexxx and begins to walk around the cell clockwise, as fans reach over the barrier and slap him on the back.  Ignoring their existence, K-Os continues around as Flexxx does the same up above.  Coming to the near side, K-Os stops besides the door and looks upwards.  Just as K-Os begins to step towards the opening, Flexxx yells something at him.  Stopping dead in his tracks, K-Os backs out and looks back up before strapping the World Belt around his waist..................

 

 

and begins to climb up top as well!  The crowd gives a minor pop as K-Os ascends the chain link!  Reaching halfway, K-Os stops as Flexxx stands on the edge, kendo stick in hand.  The two eye each other for seconds, as the links dig into the palms of K-Os and Flexxx tosses the kendo stick between his hands.  While the referee’s yell from down below, the crowd shows some life again, itching in anticipation!  Suddenly, Flexxx spins the stick behind his back, and steps back from the edge all the way to the other side of the cell’s top!]

 

Axis: [Looks behind himself, but sees nothing]  

Edwin: “Flexxx is letting K-Os to the top!  What a display of sportsmanship!  I oughta give him a cookie or something......”

Axis: [Turns back]  “I don’t think bloodlust counts as sportsmanship.”

Edwin: “Those two better be careful up the......... wait......... I sense great evil..........”

 

[While Edwin’s Commish-Sense tingles, K-Os cautiously climbs to the top and pulls himself up.  Down below, the referees carry a heated conversation wondering what to do.  However, the two men on top of the cage know exactly what to do.  As a mix of hatred, and fear, and butterflies, and determination flood through their bodies, the two wrestlers tense up................

 

 

 

and charge at each other, twenty feet up in the air!  The crowd pops, and cameras flash, as the panels of chain link on the roof of the cell buckle under the weight of the two titans!]

 

Axis: “What are these two thinking?!  This could blow out of hand in a very, very short time!”

Edwin: [Turns around, as the hooded man behind Axis covers his face]

Axis: “Don’t worry about some hoodlum behind us, this is your tournament falling apart before us!”

 

 

[Awkwardly rushing each other, Flexxx raises his kendo stick up in the air, and takes an axe swing in K-Os’ direction................

 

 

 

who dives out of the way at the last split second,  skidding across the roof as the metal digs into his side!  Hitting a cross girder on the right side, K-Os comes to an abrupt halt as his shoulder collides with the steel!  Clutching his left shoulder, K-Os closes his eyes tight to block out the pain, and opens them only to see Flexxx advancing on him, kendo stick in hand!  Stopping next to K-Os, Flexxx spins the stick up into the air, and takes a diagonal swipe at K-Os who rolls out of the way, once again at the last instant!]

 

Axis: “Flexxx is playing to the crowd with his moves, but is giving K-Os time to escape this predicament!”

Edwin: “K-Os is rueing the day he ever decided to take the fight up top!”

Axis: “.......... today?”

Edwin: “........ yes, today!  And RUE he shall!”

 

[Cursing at K-Os, Flexxx whips around and sees K-Os crawling away on his hands and knees.  Taking a leap into the air, Flexxx alters his grip on the weapon and yells out a warrior’s cry, as he drives the stick end-first looking to spear K-Os right in the back!  Hearing this yell and the screams of the crowd, an alarm goes off in K-Os’ head, and acting only on instinct, rolls to the left avoiding the shot............

 

 

 

 

but nearly rolls off the left edge of the cage!  Not able to stop his attack in mid-air, Flexxx drives the kendo stick down, right through the chain link!  Sliding halfway through, the tape on one end is too thick to fit between the links, and traps the kendo stick in the roof of the cell!  While Flexxx tries to remove it from its trap; with one leg dangling off the side, K-Os latches both hands into the chainlink and holds on for dear life as he shifts his lower body back onto the cell!  The crowd goes wild as K-Os’ heart rate skyrockets, and Flexxx tries to dislodge his weapon!]

 

Axis: “My God!  K-Os nearly rolled right off the top to the floor, and Flexxx has trapped the stick in the roof of the cell!”

Edwin: “This match hasn’t even officially started!”

 

[sure enough, back down on solid ground, the two refs arch their necks backwards watching the action as it transpires above them.  Adrenaline pumping, Flexxx tries desperately to remove the stick but it remains trapped in the fence!  Swearing a blue streak, Flexxx remembers his opponent and turns around, RIGHT INTO A BELT SHOT!!!!]

 

 

WHAM!!

 

 

[The crowd groans as K-Os returns to a vertical base, removes his title strap, and connects with a solid swing right to the temple of Flexxx!  His head snapping back, Flexxx falls to the side, and slumps to the makeshift floor.  The chainlink creates red imprints in a waffle pattern on his face, as it rests on the roof of the cage.  Collapsing to the roof himself, K-Os looks up to the rafters, then lays the belt face down and begins to fiddle with it.]

 

Axis: “What in blue blazes is K-Os doing?!”

Edwin: “It looks like.......... he’s removing............ dear lord!”

 

[As the side cameraman zooms in his camera, through a mesh of metal, just barely visible, is a piece of duct tape on the back of the belt!  His fingers wet with perspiration, K-Os fumbles with it a few times, then grabs a corner and pulls it back..................

 

 

 

revealing a small instrument taped to the inside of the belt!  Focusing the best he can, the cameraman looks into his viewfinder while the crowd looks at the Smarktron, and a collective gasp envelopes the arena!]

 

Axis: “K-OS HAS GOT WIRE CUTTERS!!”

Edwin: “I still smell evil......... and popcorn....... but now I smell the tactics of Strangler!”

 

[With an evil grin, K-Os stands up and walks from his position on the left side of the cell’s roof, around the laid out body of Flexxx, to the middle panel.  Dropping to his knees on the panel just one nearer than the middle one, K-Os immediately attacks the middle panel of the roof with the cutters!  Working as fast as he can, K-Os misses a few but cuts through the majority of links on the near side of the panel!  Turning to the left, K-Os sees Flexxx begin to rustle, but isn’t quite done.  Crawling to the right side, K-Os begins to snip through that edge of the panel.  Nearing the corner, K-Os snips the last wire and the near right corner of the panel DROPS FROM THE GIRDER!!!  The crowd pops as the middle panel sags from the roof, only two sides of it still connected, leaving a triangle shaped hole in the roof of the cell!]

 

Edwin: “This isn’t right........ somebody’s gotta stop K-Os!”

Axis: “The WF contract isn’t worth this!!  STOP THIS!!”

 

[similar thoughts are floating in the minds of all in attendance, but K-Os is on a mission and begins to cut the far edge.  With each snip, more of the panel is opened up, the hole in the roof growing larger and larger!  Wiping the sweat off his brow, K-Os’ fingers begin to feel numb from the hard work.  Hitting a stubborn link, K-Os exerts all the strength he can.................

 

 

 

 

and out of the very corner of his eye sees movement!  A simple reaction, K-Os whips to the left and tosses the cutters at an onrushing Flexxx!  The tip of the cutters hits the left bicep of Flexxx creating a small cut, but not even feeling it, Flexxx dives forward and hits a STIFF spear on K-Os to a MAJOR crowd pop!  The wire cutters skitter across the cell roof and fall to the outside on the left.  Sliding to the right of the cell, the two men are all twisted up, but Flexxx goes on primal instinct and begins to slug away at K-Os with a flurry of fists!  Curling up into a fetal position, K-Os shields himself from the brunt of the attack!]

 

Axis: “We need security, EMTs, somebody has gotta get out here!”

Edwin: “Flexxx and K-Os need to be wary of the gaping hole in the top of the cell!  That’s easily a sixty foot drop!”

Axis: [Casts an amazed look at Edwin]

Edwin: “Well okay, not sixty, but a twenty foot fall is still dangerous as heck!”

 

[Pushing up to his feet, Flexxx begins to stomp a mudhole into K-Os.  Tiring himself out, Flexxx staggers back as K-Os rolls to his side in pain.  Looking around, Flexxx eyes the trapped kendo stick, as the crowd begins to yell and cheer.  Looking to them with a grin, Flexxx begins to walk around the hole on the far side, but not in the direction of the stick.  Reaching the left side of the cell, Flexxx bends over and picks up the World Championship Belt!  Raising it to the crowd, Flexxx causes a deafening roar, then slowly turns back to K-Os who has begun to rise.  Walking to the far panel, Flexxx fixes his grip on the belt and bends over in anticipation!]

 

Axis: “Flexxx is looking for revenge from that earlier shot!”

Edwin: “Look at the ramp, here comes the cavalry!”

 

[From the entrance on the stage, its not the Clan, not Dana, not any wrestler at all.  Two more referees, and some paramedics run out to ringside, quickly conversing with the two original refs.  Edwin leaves his post at the table, and rushes over to join the huddle.  Not noticing any of the happenings below, K-Os holds his head as he reaches a vertical base and turns around.  Seeing the whites of K-Os’ eyes, Flexxx tosses the title belt at him!  K-Os’ reflexes are good enough to catch the gold, but not great enough to avoid...............]

 

“OOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH............”

 

[As camera shutters fly, Flexxx bends down and leaps into the air, rotating his body and bending his right leg!  With picture perfect execution, Flexxx extends his right foot RIGHT INTO THE BELT, SLAMMING IT INTO K-OS’ FACE!!  The metal plating on the front of the belt crashes into the nose and face of K-Os, causing K-Os to fall straight back to the chainlink!  Flexxx drops to the cell as the crowd hits an unnatural decibel level.  Looking over his shoulder, he sees a motionless K-Os, with the title laying partially over his body!]

 

Axis: “FLEXXX WITH THE FLUNK-DOWWWNN!!!!”

 

[The crowd’s noise takes dozens of seconds to die down, while Flexxx remains down recuperating, and K-Os remains unconscious.  Rolling to his back, Flexxx curls his stomach then kips up to his feet!  Nearly losing his footing on the slick metal, Flexxx quickly regains his balance and flashes a grin at the crowd.  Walking slowly over to the fallen K-Os, Flexxx hold his hand over his left bicep and removes it, seeing his fingers turned red slightly.  Looking down on K-Os, Flexxx sees he’s not the worst off.  Inside the cell, tiny drops fall from the roof and crash to the mat leaving small red splashes on the mat.  As the crowd realizes the source of the droplets, a twinge is felt in the stomachs of all.  Pulling K-Os up slowly by the hair, Flexxx looks in awe of the flow of blood from the nose of the champ.]

 

Axis: “K-Os has been busted open!  That Flunk-Down with the belt may have broken his nose!  And Flexxx is bleeding as well, from that cheap shot with the cutters.  The hatred between these men goes above and beyond any care for a contract!  This match may never even happen!”

 

[Finally managing to stand up with assistance from Flexxx, K-Os stumbles around, his entire sense of balance gone.  Seeing a weakened prey, memories flood through the mind of Flexxx.  Kendo stick shots, moonsaults, a huge cage, all these haunting images flash through his mind’s eye.  Looking over his shoulder, Flexxx eyes the gaping hole in the middle of the roof..................

 

 

 

then latches on a front facelock, and steadies himself on the awkward chain link.  Straining with every muscle, Flexxx lifts K-Os up high into the air, and drops him straight backwards in a vertical suplex!  The crowd pops as K-Os falls right towards the hole, but lands a few feet short!  His right foot dangling over the opening, K-Os remains still on the roof as Flexxx pushes to his feet.]

 

Axis: “Jesus........... Flexxx almost suplexed K-Os into that hole!  Edwin and the officials look like they’re gonna do something.........”

 

[Outside the cell, Edwin tells something to all the officials and points to the air.  Shaking their heads, they move over to the open door of the cell as Edwin rushes back to his announce position.  Up top, K-Os rolls to his side and slowly begins to stand back up, his feet mere inches away from the hole.  Flexxx looks out to the crowd, who are of mixed reaction.  Many cheers, some boos, and lots of silence, the people in attendance watch in awe, some intrigued and some worried.  Turning back to K-Os, Flexxx winds up.............]

 

Axis: “Don’t do it Flexxx!  Even K-Os doesn’t deserve this!!”

Edwin: “This match is out of control!”

 

[His fist raised in the air, Flexxx looks at K-Os, his primal rage and his mind battling over what to do!  Flexxx remains on the brink of doing so, when his fist drops and he turns his face to the side!  The crowd’s pop is immediately cut off though, as K-Os nails a punch to the exposed cheek of Flexxx!  Enraged, Flexxx winds up and lets loose with a punch in retaliation.  Somehow, through his red-tinted vision, K-Os sees the oncoming fist....................

 

 

 

ducks out of the way..............................

 

 

 

 

and SHOVES FLEXXX TOWARDS THE HOLE!!!   His feet right on the edge of the hole, Flexxx swings his arms wildly to regain his balance, but before he can do so, K-Os dives and nails a forearm to the back CAUSING FLEXXX TO FALL!!!!]

 

 

Axis: “MY GOD!!”

Edwin: “NO!!”

 

[The crowd all bolt to their feet as Flexxx falls forward!  Looking down, all he can see is the blue surface of the mat, way down below already tainted with the blood of K-Os.  Shooting out his arms to the right, Flexxx tries to grab a hold of the missing panel’s far girder!  His forearms slam HARD into the metal, but as he falls further down, his hands grab a hold of the edge!!  The crowd pops as Flexxx remains dangling from the girder, his momentum from the fall swinging him back and forth!  His legs kick out wildly, and his forearms feel numb, but Flexxx retains a deathgrip on the edge!]

 

Axis: “Flexxx has caught a hold of the edge!”

Edwin: “Get in there guys!!”

 

[While K-Os crumples on the roof, and Flexxx remains hanging, the head paramedic enters the cell and jumps to the apron.  The sweat on his hands causes Flexxx’s grip to slowly weaken with every second.  Struggling, the Lone Star Fighter attempts to pull himself up, his cut bicep screaming in pain!  Pulling himself up, Flexxx shoots out with his left hand and grabs past the girder to some chainlink!  His head and shoulders back above the roof, Flexxx grabs out with the right hand as well, both with a firm hold.  Pushing his body as far as it can go, Flexxx begins to pull his torso and lower body back out.............]

 

 

WHAM!!!  

 

 

[The crowd’s screams are laced with worry as K-Os stomps his foot down on the left arm of Flexxx!  Losing his hold, Flexxx’s right hand is the only thing keeping him from falling!  Looking down on his opponent, K-Os smiles at him before.............]

 

 

WHAM!!

 

 

Axis: “NO NO NO!!!”

 

 

[Flexxx enters a free fall, twenty feet in height as K-Os stomps on his right hand.  Grabbing wildly for something, Flexxx’s hands just miss the girder as his body begins to speed up its descent.  All of his limbs flailing, Flexxx begins to turn in mid-air.  Not a single camera flashes, as all the jaws in the arena drop in time with Flexxx.  Ten feet............. five feet.......... hitting the mat with his right leg first, the impact slams Flexxx down hard to his right side.  Bouncing off the canvas slightly, Flexxx remains down on the ground, on his side, not moving an inch.]

 

 

Edwin: “........................”

 

 

[before Flexxx even hits the mat, the head paramedic dives in the ring.  Crouching over Flexxx, he begins to check on the wrestler.  Up on top of the cell, K-Os looks down at what he caused, his blood still dripping down to the mat below.  Rolling to the far side, K-Os slowly and casually begins to climb down the far side of the cell.  The officials all mill around the entrance, looking for any sign from the inside.  A hushed silence falls over the arena, as the paramedic tries to get a response from Flexxx.  The cameramen remain zoomed out, themselves looking for the signal they hope for.  In an instant...............

 

 

 

Flexxx opens his eyes.  Looking to the familiar face above him, Flexxx takes stock of his body.  Bending his arms, bending his legs, Flexxx winces as pain laces up the right side of his body.  The paramedic begins to check his head, and the right side of his body as K-Os touches to the ground on the outside.  Flexxx nods his head to the questions, and sits up slowly as the crowd’s boos resonate throughout the arena.  In a world of his own, K-Os walks past the insults, the glaring looks, the middle fingers, as he hobbles around the cell.  Pushing the paramedic back, Flexxx pushes to his hands and knees, then cautiously gets to his feet!  The crowd pops as Flexxx stands up, but then instantly loses his balance and slumps into the left ropes.]

 

Axis: “I don’t know how or why or anything...........  Flexxx is still up and moving.”

Edwin: “The heart of the lion this kid!”

Axis: “But what happens now with this tournament?  Is this getting pushed back?  Is Flexxx out of it?”

Edwin: “I wish I could answer, but my Commish powers can only be stretched so far!”

 

[Rushing over to Flexxx, the paramedic checks on him again, but is gently pushed away as Flexxx tells him something.  A look of pain on his face, the paramedic turns around, and exits the ring then the cell and talks to the refs.  Shoving past them all, K-Os steps through the door and slides into the ring as Flexxx shakes out his right leg.  As the officials, the crowd, the announcers, little Billy, they all look in disbelief.................

 

 

 

Flexxx begins to trade punches with K-Os!!  A quick squabble breaks out in the group, then shrugging his arms, the head ref dives back into the ring and motions for the bell!  As the second ref begins to lock the door, the others slowly migrate to the back!]

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

Axis: “I’ve never seen anything like this!”

Edwin: [sniffs]  “This kinda cuts through ya, right to the ole’ heart........”

Axis: “Flexxx is making this match go on!  Even after that god awful drop.........”

Edwin: “He landed the best possible way he could’ve.  These JLers are a hardy bunch I tells ya!”

 

[The two bitter enemies use the little energy left in their reserves, putting as much stank on every punch possible.  The crowd’s noise is out of this world, as Flexxx slowly begins to take control.  After landing two punches, Flexxx is stopped in his tracks as K-Os nails a kick to the right side of Flexxx’s guts!  Doubling over, Flexxx quickly is grabbed around the waist as K-Os plants him with a Gutwrench Suplex!  Scrambling for the hook of the leg, K-Os gets the cover!]

 

 

ONE!!

 

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

 

TH - kick out!

 

 

Axis: “K-Os is easily the one better off at this stage!  He’s got all the momentum!”

Edwin: “Well, duh.......... he didn’t fall from the cell you nut.”

Axis: “I guess we say goodbye to serious Edwin now.”

 

[bolting to his feet, K-Os stumbles back a step and holds his head, then shakes it off and begins to stomp on the torso of Flexxx.  Pulling him up to his feet, K-Os lifts up his right arm and then nails two hard punches to the right side of Flexxx.  With a hard kick, Flexxx bends over to cease the pain, and K-Os quickly applies a standing head scissors on the left side of the ring.  Drawing his thumb across his throat, K-Os grabs the waist of Flexxx and pulls him up onto his shoulders!  Finding his strength and balance non-existent, K-Os staggers backwards trying to keep Flexxx up!  Finally steadying himself, K-Os looks to plant Flexxx with the Hell Helix........................

 

 

 

but Flexxx reaches and grabs the chainlink on the left side of the wall!  The crowd pops as K-Os finds he can’t pull Flexxx down and can’t understand why.  Thinking fast on K-Os’ shoulders, Flexxx throws himself backwards and hits a perfect hurricanrana!  K-Os’ body slides across the mat, and Flexxx slowly crawls after him.  Grabbing both legs, Flexxx rolls him into a tight cover!]

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

.............

 

 

 

 

THRE - kick out!

 

[The crowd’s pop is huge, but is cut short as K-Os gets his shoulder off the mat.  Not wasting any time, Flexxx pulls both men up and grabs a hold of K-Os’ locks of hair.  Rushing to the left side of the ring, Flexxx drives K-Os’ face hard into the wall of the cell, causing blood to fly everywhere, staining the links red!  K-Os slams back first to the mat, and Flexxx dives upon him landing hard fists to the bloodied nose!  K-Os’ eyes roll back into his head as Flexxx drops it and stands up.  Looking around at the screaming crowd, Flexxx drops his head back and wipes his face..................

 

 

 

and sees something.  Something that gives him an idea.]

 

 

Axis: [is hit with an empty box of popcorn]

Edwin: “Flexxx is unreal!  How is he still going?!  How is K-Os still going for that matter?!  Why am I yelling?!”

Axis: “What the.......” [Turns around and is hit with a plastic bowl] “AGH!”

Edwin: [Plastic bowl drops in his lap]  “Hey.............. I knew that hoodlum looked familiar!”

 

[Grabbing a hold of the chainlink, Flexxx leaps up to the left wall and climbs to the top of the inside!  As the crowd goes wild, Flexxx reaches across the top...............

 

 

 

and grabs a hold of the kendo stick!  Sticking through the roof, Flexxx twists at it finally dislodging it from its resting place!  Carefully climbing back down, Flexxx places both feet on the top rope and turns around.  With one quick prayer, Flexxx leaps off, twisting into a swanton bomb!  Aiming for the kendo stick to hit K-Os instead of him, Flexxx is lit up with camera flashes......................

 

 

 

as he drives the kendo stick to the mat!!  Rolling out of the way at the last second, K-Os saves his ribs and the contract!  Both men remain laid out for seconds as the crowd cheers.  The referee watches over as both slowly begin to stir.]

 

 

Axis: [sacred is heard over the mike]  “You thought you could get rid of me??  NEVER!!!”

Edwin: “Sacred, a class act all the way.”

Axis: “Security....... security........ we need a little assistance.”

 

[Pushing to their feet, both men slowly turn around and see each other.  Lunging forward with a punch, K-Os forgets something important as Flexxx nails a kendo stick shot to the chest!    The crowd pops as Flexxx nails the same shot again, then drops the weapon as K-Os stumbles back.  Rushing over to a stunned K-Os, Flexxx puts his head under K-Os’ right arm.....................]

 

 

Axis: “FLEXXX WITH THE GOLDEN GUN!!!”

 

 

[The crowd pops as Flexxx looks to lift K-Os up............

 

 

 

 

but K-Os ducks out of the hold, and pushes Flexxx away to the ropes in desperation!  Using his momentum, Flexxx bounces off the far ropes and turns back to see something he wished he never had.  Stepping to the right slightly, K-Os charges Flexxx and.................]

 

 

WHAM!!!

 

OOooooohhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!

 

 

Edwin: “Well that’s not cool.........”

Axis: “K-Os with a Gore into the injured right side of Flexxx!”

 

[The crowd gives a half-hearted pop at the impact, then slides into a groan as the two men slide toward the far left corner!  Sliding to a stop, K-Os rolls off of Flexxx who quickly clutches his side.  Squirming on the ground, Flexxx barely hears the booing of the crowd as K-Os stands up and looks to the far left corner.  Stalking to the turnbuckle, K-Os begins to ascend the ropes, memories flooding over him as well.  Reaching the top rope, K-Os stops and looks over his shoulder...................

 

 

 

then, turns back............ and begins to climb up the corner of the wall!  A few feet higher, K-Os digs his toes into the chainlink as much as possible and looks back again.  Seeing Flexxx still down, K-Os closes his eyes and leaps.  The crowd raises to a crescendo as K-Os pushes off from the chainlink and begins to flip over backwards.  Seeing his world upside down, K-Os has no control as he drops.....................

 

 

 

and flips...........................................

 

 

 

 

landing right on top of Flexxx!  The crowd breaks out in a wave of heat as he remains on top, not even enough strength left for a hook of the leg.]

 

 

ONE!!..................

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!!!...................

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!!!

 

 

DING DING DING!!

 

 

 

[The referee raises his hand, as the crowd boos with all they’ve got.]

 

Funyon: “The winner by pinfall at 28:25.................... KAAAAAAAAA-OSS!!!”

 

[slowly getting to his feet, K-Os raises his arms then brings them back down as pain shoots through him.  Looking up to the ramp............................

 

 

 

he sees Lady Red smiling at the entrance.]

 

 

[Fade to commercial]

[Guest crusen86]

Singles Match

"Deathwish" Danny Williams vs. "The Superior One" Tom Flesher

WINNER: "Superior One" Tom Flesher!

 

First Pin Wins Match

The Dark Reaper vs. Cutthroat vs. Z

WINNER: Z

 

TV Title Match

Shawn Brody © vs. Mike Van Siclen

WINNER: Shawn Brody (Close One apparently)

 

Singles Match

Mafia vs. Ced Ordonez

WINNER: Ced Ordonez. Both men had the same intro. Kooky.

 

No DQ Match

Low Brass vs. Ash Ketchum

WINNER: Ash Ketchum

 

MAIN EVENT

Hell In A Cell Match

K-Os vs. Flexxx

WINNER: K-Os. It was default, and I knew it would be. Flexxx retired last week. I thought he might of wrote for this special occasion, but oh well.