Promo: The Latest Sensation Speaks

[Rawknight 0]

::Taped for the syndicated shows, i guess::

 

Backstage in New Hampshire Ben Hardy waits patiently, occasionally glancing down at his watch, awaiting the arrival of his chosen interviewees. Casually strolling into frame is the tall, built and muscular frame of Chris Card, the undefeated and inimitably cool superstar, followed closely as ever by his sensual, stylish, sometimes sick but always stunningly sexy manager, the Gothic Diva herself, Natasha. Card flicks a lock of loose hair back away from his face. Card checks for the red light on the camera and stares intently straight down the lens, Natasha echoing the controlled gaze of Card with a knowing smirk of her own. Card turns and looks down at Hardy, flexing his muscles to contrast the size of his cut bicep with Hardy’s head.

 

Ben Hardy: You join me here backstage, where I have been granted an exclusive interview with the SJL’s hottest new property, “Technical Perfection” Chris Card and his beautiful ring valet and manager Natasha.

 

Chris Card: Quick being a suckup and make with the questions. You know I’m a busy man, with a DAMN busy training schedule, and mouthing off to jerkwads like yourself about how great I am, though fun, is not a productive way to spend my damn time.

 

Ben Hardy: Well the first thing I want to ask, if you’ll grant me this Chris, is the question that’s been on the lips of many of the SJL’s staff. What IS going on between The Gothic Diva Natasha and the dark and twisted Crow?

 

Natasha: Well Ben, you know my personal life is no business of yours, but seeing as I myself have chosen to put this damn thing in the open by my own call I’m going to set everyone straight. My first priority is, was, and always will be Chris Card and making sure Chris Card gets every chance and opportunity to rise up the ranks of this federation. But you see there’s business and pleasure, and I try not to mix the two. Like I said on the show earlier Chris Card is business. But what I want for Crow

 

Natasha takes the mike and runs her bottom lip along it’s increasingly phallic looking shaft.

 

Natasha: Is ALL pleasure.

 

Ben Hardy: You appeared concerned for Crow after his hard fought and hardcore method of victory earlier. Does it bother you to see Crow getting hurt like that?

 

Natasha: Does it bother me to see Crow get hurt. No. I love it. I love seeing Crow in pain. Pain to me is such…

 

Natasha runs a finger down Hardy’s face, and Hardy instinctively shirks away as she turns in a hard black coated fingernail towards Hardy’s cheek.

 

Natasha: …a turn on. And seeing a dark, sinister gothic individual, a sick twisted man, a man who those who consider themselves normal would call a freak. Seeing the divine form of Crow twisted in pain, suppressing a scream, blood dripping across his face. It turns me on so much. And Crow, if you want a piece of what this Sexy Goth Bitch can offer you, all you have to do is bleed. You do know how to bleed, don’t you?

 

Ben Hardy gives a little shocked look at the sexy smile of Natasha. Spotting the interviewer’s reaction, Card smirks and lets out a little self contented chuckle.

 

Ben Hardy: So what are your plans FOR Crow?

 

Chris Card: Enough bullshit, Ben. Get to the damn WRESTLING. You can keep your rope opera bullshit away from Chris Card, that’s not what I’m about. Natasha and Crow’s Natasha and Crow’s issue, but I’m wasting my time here unless you ask ME something, damn it.

 

Ben backs off Card a half step, intimidated by his confrontational tone.

 

Ben Hardy: Well. Given that you’ve made such an impact in the SJL so far, a three match win streak, each a fine technical display, do you have a message for all your new fans.

 

Chris Card: A FINE technical display? Each time I step through the ring ropes, each time I enter the squared circle it’s one thing and one thing only. Technical perfection. I am the best damn thing you can ever hope to see. I am greatness in human form. All the kids watching wrestling, they all wanna grow up to be great wrestlers. Watch me. Learn how it’s done. Punk kids on the Indy circuit killing themselves in death matches and high flying moves. That’s not wrestling. I, Chris Card, am wrestling. So to all the fans young and old who aspire to be a great wrestler, watch me. Learn from what I do. Try it yourself. You will be a better wrestler. But you’ll never be me, because not one person in this arena tonight, in this state, in the viewing audience, in the WHOLE DAMN WORLD will ever, EVER, have what it takes to be as good as me. Deal with it.

 

Card exits with another deep stare to the camera as he delivers his line. Ben Hardy stands and looks a little taken aback as we fade out.

[Guest realitycheck]

...Natasha fuckin' scares me, man.

 

Heh, heh... in all seriousness, though, it is very (very, very, VERY) rare for anyone to expand 'round here on the character who manages or escorts them to the ring, let alone make them such a big part of their own character. Even if Natasha is freaky. But I guess that means you're doing something right.

 

Card himself seems to be made in the same mould as most of the SWF's cocky heels. That's not a bad thing, considering almost all of said characters go on to great success... Anyway, a good, solid promo that I enjoyed. We many not get many new guys anymore, but the ones we do are teh roq.

 

-Z

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

Two Thumbs Up

[Guest Powerplay]

Quite nice, my man. (Y) at you and Crow possibly getting something so early on. Should be interesting to see how this develops. And, as Z said, Natasha fucking freaks me out. You said she was based on a girlfriend, right? Did she like cuddle you with butcher knives or something ?

[Rawknight 0]

Hmm. He's supposed to be a professional and businesslike, arorgant only about his ability heel (Heel Benoit). I think I need to work on getting that over more. He's not an arrogant and cocky heel HBK/Jerichoy type - there's a a few great ones of them around the SWF/SJL, HSJ showing the very best of that style this week.

 

Still fun to look back on that era of Card's character though, waking up with blondes in the appartment and bitching out his trainer. Maybe I should organise an archive of my old promos. Then you get to hear the suckiness of Card's original catchphrase!

[Guest HollywoodSpikeJenkins]

I already said its a two thumbs up promo, but mentioning my name and saying I'm Great, if I had an extra thumb, I'd give it three thumbs up.

[Rawknight 0]

If I pointed out I'm gonna kick your ass on Wrath, would that save you needing a thumb graft? *grins*

[Guest Muzz]

 

I'm bored.

[Guest Ace309]

Natasha's coming to my next birthday party.

 

She's going to jump out of the cake.

 

And then stab my brother.

[Rawknight 0]

Natasha wouldn't stab your brother.

 

Course if he were to stab himself, she'd be the first to come kiss him all better...

[Guest Crowe]

Natasha gets me horny. Oh, and kick ass promo, dude. \m/

[Guest Thoth]

Your new name is Durandal!