The WORST Royal Rumble EeevVVveEeRRR!!

[Guest GameCop]

Ladies and gentlemen, children of all ages, lets get ready to RUMBLE!!!

 

~ YEAH RIGHT!!

 

Today I payed almost $40 for the ultimate Royal Rumble PPV. I was in utter dissapointment and trully disatisfied. I will most likely not order another PPV again. The Dam WWE is taking our money and making us look like a big bunch of @$$ clowns. I don't care if Scott Keith gives the PPV *****, this was a DDDDDDDDDD-----UD!!

 

" WWE is now where the big boys play, yes, yes, its true!! " Brock, Batista, Undertaker and Kane!! Wow its gonna be a Slobber Knocker!!

 

Anyhow obviously Brock won, not once, but TWICE!! -- for all the people who like Brock, sorry but this guy ain't GoldBerg.

 

And for all you people out there who want a REAL RetRo Rant here ya go:

 

World Tag Team Titles

Dudley Boys vs. Lance Storm and William Regal ©

 

Winner: Dudley Boys

Stars: *

 

Dawn Marie Wilson vs. Torrie Wilson

 

Winner: Torrie

Stars: DUD

Notes: Please to god, let this end this story line!!

 

World Title

Triple H © w/Ric Flair vs. Scott Steiner

 

Winner: HHH

Stars: DUD

Notes: If Anyone even gives this match a star, then you must have been asleep watching the PPV!!

 

WWE Title

Kurt Angle © w/Paul Heyman and Team Angle vs. Chris Benoit

 

Winner: Kurt Angle

Stars: *** 3/4

Notes: This match will go into the best matches database, but it could have been a hell of a lot better.

 

Royal Rumble

 

Winner: Brock Lesnar

Stars: **

Notes: The WORST Royal Rumble ever. It had all the good wrestlers and they just bombed it. They screwed it up like 5 times. Way, way, too many people in the ring at once, plus HBK should have not been eliminated so stupidly.

 

I give this PPV a way, way, way, way,

 

THUMBS DOWN!!!

 

For anyone who wasted they're hard earned money on this PPV, I am way sorry. And if you want to waste your time downloading it, seriously download something else, like the Royal Rumble 1989 spectacula ( From Kazaa )!!

 

P.S. No offence to Scott Keith, btw.

[Guest Jobber of the Week]

What happened if someone made a thread, and there was nothing there?

[Guest GameCop]

My post got screwed up due to the server. It's back up now.

[Guest Coffey]

Man dude, I seriously don't even know what site Scott Keith writes for. I straight forgot.

 

Someone wanna link me, because I'm actually curious to see how cruel Scott Keith is on this PPV. He's usually pretty hard on things, and this PPV was awful.

[Guest Choken One]

Horrible Idiot. Here. This rumble vastly outdid 1993, 1995, 1996, 1998 and 1999's rumble alone. It had a **** WWE Title match at the least, Nothing outright sucked, even the RAW Title Match, Dawn/Torrie was short as was the Tag title match.

 

GameCop needs to give this show another look at. This show was a Blast for me, I had about 20 of my friends, treated them all to Wings and we had a ROCKIN time. You must have been alone in your basement in silence.

 

The Rumble might have been 1992 or even 2000, It certaintly was good and it had some good moments in it.

[Guest Anglesault]

I don't think it's up yet.

[Guest The Mighty Damaramu]

Well after the god damn cable company messed up I was able to catch the replay. And let me say.......I thought it was very good. The WWE Title match was fantastic! And the rumble itself was really good. Me and my friends were dissapointed when HBK cost Jericho the match but then again we saw that it was setting up the match where HBK hopefully puts Jericho over we understood. After that it was rooting for Brock all the way! And he won!

Also I see people bitching that Test threw Jericho out.....I don't really think it had anything to do with Test....it was HBK costing Jericho the match. Test will not be remembered at all tomorrow night when it comes to Jericho's elimination. Oh and I see some bitching on RVD's elimination. I thought that his elimination was a nice bit. As he told Kane to do whatever to win and Kane actually outsmarted RVD. I liked that touch.

[Guest candie45]

Nothing outright sucked, even the RAW Title Match

*laughs hysterically*

 

All I want to say is thank God we didn't have to pay for that...

[Guest The Mighty Damaramu]

Well I didn't have to pay for it because of my stupid cable company. FUCK YOU COX CABLE! So I got a good show for free.

Another thing I liked in the Rumble was when Maven dropkicked Taker and then started celebrating....that was hilarious. And whenever Kane came out I was like "Throw the fat men out! Come on you're the best hoss in the WWE...kill the other hosses!"

[Guest big Dante Cruz]

Truth be told, I loved the Rumble itself and Benoit/Angle was solid gold. I honestly don't remember a bout I enjoyed more. Kurt used more of a heel hook than an ankle lock at the end, but he did it correctly and he won with it. That's something to build on.

 

As for the other matches, well, good work by Brock, Torrie was nice to look at and maybe (hopefully) we've seen the last of Steiner.

[Guest Anglesault]

Man dude, I seriously don't even know what site Scott Keith writes for. I straight forgot.

 

Someone wanna link me, because I'm actually curious to see how cruel Scott Keith is on this PPV. He's usually pretty hard on things, and this PPV was awful.

Here we go. He was gentle.

 

The SmarK Rant For WWE Royal Rumble 2003

Posted By Scott Keith on 01.20.03

The SmarK Rant for WWE Royal Rumble 2003

 

- Thanks to all those who bought “Tonight…In This Very Ring” over the weekend, temporarily pushing it as high as #2000 on the Amazon rankings for most of the weekend. They should be shipping from Amazon soon and in bookstores by the end of the month, so hang tight! For those who need a link once again, http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/080...0422233-2338568

 

- Live from Boston, which rhymes with Austin. Is this a sign of his impending return? STAY TUNED!

 

- Your hosts are JR & King & Cole & Tazz.

 

- Opening match: Big Show v. Brock Lesnar. And here I bet Show thought he was done with being an opening match job guy. Show wins the lockup battle to start, but loses the power battle in the corner. He blocks a suplex, but Brock goes to the knee and gets a second try. Another one hits, but Show blocks a third and dumps Brock, who takes his customary bump. Back in, Show stomps away in the corner and tosses Brock around. Charge misses and Brock throws him with a release german for two. Heyman trips up Brock, putting Show back in control with a big boot and a sideslam. Show is sucking wind. Chokeslam is reversed with Benoit’s counter-roll for two, and Brock hits another suplex. Heyman gets brought in involuntarily, and Brock’s F5 attempt is stopped by Show with the chokeslam. But c’mon, like this is gonna get anything, and indeed Brock is out at two. Another chokeslam attempt is reversed by Brock and the F5 finishes at 6:28. Short and inoffensive. **

 

- RAW Tag team titles: King Regal & Sir Lancelot v. The Dudley Boyz. Bubba and Storm start and Bubba gets a hiptoss, but Storm hammers away in the corner. Bubba slugs back and gets a half-powerbomb and works the leg for some reason. D-Von comes in with the elbow, and he handles both Regal & Storm and drops an elbow on Regal for two. A cheapshot turns the tide and Regal gets a Northern Lights suplex for two. Storm gets an elbow for two. Regal works the arm and monkey-flips D-Von back into the corner, where Storm chokes him out. The dreaded neck vice is YOUR resthold du jour. Hot tag Bubba and he gets a backdrop on Storm and splashes both guys in the corner. Sideslam on Storm gets two. Release german gets two. Bubba Bomb gets two. Whazzup Drop sets up a flapjack for Storm that gets two for D-Von. Queef Morley comes out to protest something by the Dudleyz, allowing Regal to load up the Power of the Punch, but he walks into 3D and D-Von finishes Storm with the knux to win the titles at 7:26. Kind of a strange ending to a short match. Both teams are so stale that I still don’t get the point of taking the titles off BookDust in the first place. **

 

- Dawn Marie v. Torrie Wilson. They air the entire Al Wilson saga before the match, as though ANYTHING is gonna help this have heat. Dawn attacks to start and stomps away. Neither girl gets a reaction from the crowd coming in, by the way, showing how effective the angle was. Torrie tosses Dawn around and catapults her. A suplex is blocked and Dawn takes her down with something vaguely resembling an armbar takedown. Dawn keeps working on the arm and gets two. She switches arms out of nowhere and starts working on the left instead of the right, which Torrie then ignores before walking into a flapjack. They collide in an obviously fucked up spot and Torrie gets a bad backslide for two. Torrie gets a couple of armdrags for no reason in particular, but Dawn comes back with a springboard clothesline that’s on par with Bull Buchanan’s. That’s not a compliment. Torrie finishes with a neckbreaker at 3:38. Dawn promises that it’s not over. Normally I’m not one for bait-and-switch, but I’d be happy to see them break that promise. -*

 

- RAW World title: HHH v. Scott Steiner. Steiner has a big “#1” added to his tights in the colors of the US flag. See, he may be a roid freak with anger issues and crippling injuries, but he’s AMERICAN! HHH has odd-looking red tights tonight, which I guess means that Steiner gave it to him extra hard before the match and he’s bleeding all over. JR notes that Steiner is a very emotional challenger…in bed. HHH is the Cerebral Assassin…in bed. Steiner pounds away to start…in bed. Okay, enough of that. More punching and Steiner has nothing and it’s obvious. He’s sucking wind 15 seconds in. Press slam and he’s barely able to get HHH in the air, and HHH bails. JR notes that he’s trying to stop this offensive onslaught…in bed. Steiner keeps pounding away on the floor and sends HHH into the post backfirst, indicating that a bearhug will be forthcoming. See, with Steiner you call the psychology according to the restholds he’s most likely to use. Suplex back in gets two. Steiner stays on the back and keeps chopping, with no force. He’s done. Boston Crab, but HHH makes the ropes. Steiner keeps elbowing HHH on the mat and stomping away. Facecrusher from HHH, but Steiner no-sells and goes to the predicted bearhug. The crowd is rapidly losing patience with the match, rightly so. HHH escapes, but walks into an overhead suplex. That’s one. Flair pulls HHH out of harm’s way, which is lucky because Steiner is pulling all the oxygen in the first six rows into his lungs. Steiner misses a charge and HHH stomps away and tosses him, as we get another exciting sequence on the floor. Back in, neckbreaker gets two. I try to make another joke out JR’s call, but he goes into one of his patented run-on sentences that go on for like a minute. Steiner comes back but falls victim to the MIDCARD NECKBREAKER OF DOOM for two. Steiner is FINISHED. I mean, we’re talking Ultimate Warrior after 20 minutes with Hogan in 1990 territory here. KICK WHAM PEDIGREE is reversed by Steiner into a catapult, but he’s so out of it that HHH has to do all the work. T-Bone suplex and Steiner COLLAPSES due to being gassed, and they do a horrible tombstone reversal sequence that leads to HHH saving it with a neckbreaker that was so badly done it was nearly a Diamond Cutter. It gets two and the crowd starts turning on Steiner. HHH gets a suplex and goes up, but gets caught with another overhead suplex from Steiner. That’s two. Steiner is STILL unable to stand up without crawling up the ropes, and they slug it out, leading to Steiner getting a backdrop and a third overhead suplex. Four of them. Now the crowd is catching on that Steiner has nothing else in the arsenal. A fifth and the crowd is getting sick of it. Belly to belly gets two, and the crowd is booing Steiner. Tiger bomb is completely blown by Steiner, and he’s now a heel as far as the crowd is concerned. JR & King are now in a really bad situation, because they have to continue putting the match over as something good, but it’s obviously a disaster at this point. HHH goes up and Steiner gets a superplex for two as HHH desperately bumps all over to keep Steiner in the match. HHH and Flair try to take a powder (which I would have happily taken at this point), but Steiner chases them down and hits HHH with the belt, drawing blood. What exactly would have cut HHH open there? The leather edge? Back in, Steiner gets a SIXTH overhead suplex, which draws open boos from the crowd. HHH bails again, trying to put over Steiner by running away, but only pissing off the crowd even worse. They should have realized the problem and gone home long ago. Back in, Steiner does some sad pushups, unable to even do that properly at this point, and keeps pounding away in the corner as the match has lost all semblance of flow and storyline. This is like a textbook lesson on what NOT to do. HHH bumps the ref to try to draw a DQ, but Hebner isn’t selling, and the MATCH MUST CONTINUE. The crowd doesn’t know whether to cheer or boo. Another lame suplex from Steiner gets two, and he’s still got nothing else. HHH goes low (turning himself babyface) and gets a rollup for two. The crowd is just booing everything out of spite at this point. HHH gets the phallic sledgehammer from under the ring (which is the fake one because he doesn’t bang it on the steps first) and Hebner is so sick of the match that he calls a DQ at 18:13, which is enough for the crowd to completely turn on the match and boo both guys out of the building. Steiner comes back and cleans house with the sledgehammer, drawing more boos from the crowd, and guaranteeing himself a one-way trip back to the WWA. I would be SHOCKED if Steiner makes it to Wrestlemania after this debacle. -**1/2 HHH tried, but no one gets Freakzilla over DUD at this point. Buh-bye, Scott, hope you enjoyed your month in the WWE. By the way, for those who praised the WWE for keeping them separate as “great booking” to build interest in the match, I hope you now understand why they were kept out of the ring leading up to this. Go ahead, Steiner drones, defend this shit, I dare you.

 

- Smackdown World title: Kurt Angle v. Chris Benoit. Well, they’ve got their work cut out for them following that crap. Benoit takes him down and tries a Sharpshooter, but Angle bails. Back in, Benoit mule kicks him and escapes a sleeper with an armdrag, then legdrags him into another Sharpshooter attempt, but Angle makes the ropes before he can finish. Angle sends him into the post and pounds on him, and gets a suplex for two. They exchange chops, which is rather dumb of Angle, and Benoit takes over. Boomerang clothesline and knee to the gut get two. More chops and he knees Angle down, but gets suplexed onto the top rope to stop the rally. He necksnaps Angle and drags him onto the apron, where they slug it out, and Benoit DDTs him onto the apron. Coolness. Back in, Benoit gets two. He goes up, but misses the headbutt, and then counters an Angle Slam into a Sharpshooter. He really needs to start using that as a finish. Angle makes the ropes. Backdrop suplex gets two. He walks into an overhead suplex from Angle (done with snap and force, unlike Steiner’s sloppy throws), however, and bails. Angle stomps him on the floor and they head back in, which Angle short-arms him for two. Angle hits the chinlock and they turn it into a mat sequence as Benoit armdrags out of it, but Angle snaps off another overhead suplex. Nasty backdrop suplex gets two, and Angle goes back to the chinlock. Using the bodyscissors is a nice touch. Benoit fights out again, and they collide with clotheslines for the double KO. Crowd is into it, which is always a good sign. Benoit fights back with clotheslines and gets a backdrop to set up the rolling germans, but Angle reverses to his own, which Benoit then reverses to one more of his own. Benoit gives him the SNOT ROCKET OF DEATH and goes up, but Angle hits him with the Pop Up Superplex for two. See, blowing snot on your opponent is never a good idea. Lou Thesz did the same thing in 1938 and nearly lost the title as a result. Benoit counters the Angle Slam with the crossface, but Angle pulls himself to the ropes. Benoit hauls him off and gives him an anklelock, but that allows Angle to reverse to his own. Benoit counters again back to the crossface, but Angle rolls him over for two. Benoit snaps him right back into the crossface. Angle rolls through, but Benoit doesn’t release, and that proves to be a mistake as Angle hits him with the Angle Slam out of that. It gets two. That’s an awesome sequence with no booking trickery needed to pop the crowd. Angle grabs another anklelock, and Benoit has nowhere to go. He powers out instead and tries another german, but Angle reverses, which Benoit then counters with a rollup for two. Another german for Benoit, but Angle reverses to his own, but Benoit reverses and Angle takes that sick upside-down bump onto his face off it. This is just breathtaking stuff. Benoit goes up again and hits the flying headbutt from ¾ of the way across the ring as the crowd is actually chanting for Benoit now. That gets two. Crossface again, but Kurt rolls out and tries a powerbomb. He drops Benoit on the turnbuckle, into the Angle Slam, and that gets two. I was calling that as the finish while watching live. Benoit takes him down again with the crossface, and Angle is stuck, but he rolls through again into the anklelock. Benoit fights it off, but Angle won’t let go of the hold. Benoit rolls off again, but Angle stays on it. Another reversal, but Angle rolls with him and holds on. One last counter for Benoit, but Angle turns it into a heel hook to finish at 19:47. But I bet that according to HHH, neither of these guys know how to work. This is your first match of the year contender, but with the setup of the awards it’ll be forgotten by November. ****3/4 I’m deducting ¼* for the chinlocks in the middle, for those who will inevitably ask. The crowd then shows huge class and gives Benoit a standing ovation after the match for the effort. See, now they’ve got a dilemma – they’ve built up Benoit as a big babyface now, but they have nowhere to go with him because Brock-Angle is carved in stone for Wrestlemania. My solution? Move him to RAW and put him over HHH for the World title, thus keeping the momentum going and giving HHH a fresh babyface to feud with.

 

- Royal Rumble: The Fink announces 2-minute intervals, but JR announces 90 seconds. You know, another promotion used to have those sorts of coordination problems, and look where they are now. Jericho attacks Shawn from behind to start and pounds away, then grabs a chair and busts Shawn open with it. Chris Nowinski is #3, and he allows Jericho to continue his assault. Jericho tosses Shawn with ease, thus completing the slaughter. At this point I thought they may have figured out what to do with Jericho for this match, but sadly that wouldn’t last. Rey Mysterio is #4 and he hits Jericho with a dropkick and a flying headscissors, but gets powerbombed and clobbered with a forearm. Nowinski seems content to play cheerleader. Jericho blocks a charge and tosses him, but Rey hangs on and comes back in with a springboard dropkick, as Nowinski finally joins us. Edge is #5 as the intervals are all over the place and he cleans house with spears. How hard is it to time 90 seconds? They send Jericho into the corner post and out, but he’s through the middle. Rey and Edge decide to rassle, and Edge misses a spear, and Rey misses a 619. Rey takes him out with a headscissors, but Edge only hit with one foot (supposedly). Back in, Edge blocks a rana with a powerbomb. Christian is #6 as the interval is closer to two minutes now, and he reconciles with Edge, but Edge turns on him. Well, I thought he was sincere. Nowinski tosses both Edge & Rey, but they both hang on and hit him with missile dropkicks. The timing was off and Edge lands on his face. Ouch. Rey adds a broncobuster for good measure and we’re still at two minutes as Chavito is #7. He does a lucha libre sequence with Rey and gets 619’d. Another one for Christian. West Coast Pop for Nowinski eliminates him, as Rey hangs on to stay in. Jericho dumps him soon after. Tajiri is #8 and he kicks people into mush, but gets suplexed by Chavo. Tajiri gives him a Gory Special and fights with Christian in the corner as things slow down a bit. Bill DeMott is an ANGRY and INTENSE #9. He hits guys at random, but can’t toss Jericho. Nothing much going on until Tommy Dreamer is #10. Thank god they dropped Damaja so that Dreamer could keep his spot. Dreamer brings plunder and goes nuts on everyone with it, busting open Jericho hardway with the cane. Edge canes DeMott out, and Jericho & Christian get a can-chair-to on Dreamer and toss him. Crowd doesn’t like that. Tajiri hits Christian & Chavo with a handspring, but gets the Tarantula on Jericho, and gets sent out. Well, that was dumb of him. Bull is #11, heat completely gone without Cena. Edge gives him a mercifully quick exit. Edge gives Chavo the old No Mercy N64 treatment, tossing him then spearing him off the apron. He tries the same on Jericho, but turns his back too soon, as Jericho pulls himself back in and dumps Edge & Christian at the same time to clear the ring for the first time at 16:17. RVD is #12 and they slug it out, but Rob superkicks him and pounds away in the corner. Springboard kick and Rolling Thunder, but Jericho chops back. Rob catapults him out, but Jericho hangs on again. Matt Hardy is #13, with Matt Fact: He strongly dislikes mustard. Side Effect for RVD and the heels work over Rob while Shannon Moore plays cheerleader at ringside. Rob escapes a double-team situation and kicks both guys down, but Jericho bulldogs RVD, and then misses the Lionsault. Rob goes up with the frog splash as Eddie Guerrero is #14. He goes after Rob and Matt, but gets monkey-flipped by RVD. Rob fights to get him out, but Mattitude saves the day. Frog splash for RVD, but Matt turns on him and gives him a Twist of Fate. The cheating torch has been passed. Jeff Hardy is #15 and Matt wants a truce, but Jeff attacks with a forearm and jawbreaker. Matt is just so much better than Jeff at this point that it’s scary. Jeff tosses Matt, but Shannon sacrifices himself and blocks Matt’s landing, thus keeping him in. Jeff goes up for the swanton, but Shannon again saves the day, using his body to block the move. Jeff does it anyway. This Matt & Shannon stuff is a riot. Rosie is #16, adding nothing. Everyone does the usual fighting on the ropes with nothing gained. Test is #17. He starts hitting guys with clotheslines, but he’s nothing without Stacy. He dumps Jericho, but he hangs on again. John Cena is #18, rapping for the entire interval until RVD tosses him in and Charlie Haas is #19. There’s too much deadwood in there right now. Nothing going on. Jeff goes up like an idiot and RVD causally shoves him out. NEVER go to the top in the Rumble. Eddie hits Jericho with a rana as Rikishi is #20. He superkicks a bunch of guys (someone call Shawn!) and has a showdown with Rosie. Don’t even ask me the relationship there because I can never keep track. I think they’re cousins. Stinkface for the Matt/Shannon tandem is stopped by Rosie and we really need to thin out the ranks. Jamal is #21 and he hits Rikishi with a superkick, but Rikishi goes back with his own. Stinkface for Jamal and everyone’s laying around on the ropes. Kane is #22 and he starts hitting guys at will. Rosie is gone. He chokeslams the MFers at once, but can’t toss Jericho. Shelton Benjamin is #23 and Team Angle goes right for Cena while Matt saves himself from elimination again. Booker T is #24 and he axekicks Kane right off and gives us a Spinarooni. He dumps Eddie and A-Train is #25. He gets his shitty offense on a few guys before walking into a superkick from Rikishi. Rikishi tires to dump Jericho, but no dice. Shawn runs in and goes after Jericho in a really poor show of sportsmanship, fights off a few guys, and distracts Jericho long enough for Test to toss him. This seems to be building to Shawn v. Jericho at No Way Out next month. Where Shawn is supposed to be a babyface and Canadian Chris Jericho is supposed to be a heel. IN MONTREAL. Find the logical gap there. Jericho’s exit kinda deflates the crowd because the winner is obvious now with no one else left. Maven is #26 and he gets nowhere fast against Kane. Goldust is #27 with no hope of winning and everyone knows it. He gets some token offense but Team Angle sends him out right away. Crowd turns on that decision. Booker T also falls victim to them. That leaves no one for the crowd to root for. Batista is #28 and he tosses Test and the crowd still doesn’t give a crap about him. Rikishi goes next. Brock is #29 and is the obvious winner. Team Angle and Matt Hardy all feel the pain and go to the showers. Undertaker is #30 as JR is ready to start sucking some Callaway dick. He fights everyone off and sells nothing, dumping Cena and Jamal. You can tell he’s not winning because he gets to eliminate everyone. Maven’s deadly dropkick fails to work this year, as he gets chokeslammed back into the undercard and tossed by the almightly Locker Room Leader. A-Train stops the path of Ben-Gay with the Mehshugganator, and we’re down to six. Rob hits A-Train with a spinkick and Batista with a leg lariat and the people left in the match should tell you loads about the thinking when business is down. Kane & RVD eliminate A-Train, but Rob makes the mistake of trusting Kane and gets dumped.

 

Final Four: Undertaker, Kane, Batista & Brock. The match completely dies now as we’re down to three slugs and Brock. Kane works over Brock while UT punches Batista. Such excitement. Batista gives UT the MAIN EVENT SPINEBUSTER, but even such a devastating move can’t stop him. Kane & Batista work over Lesnar, but he fights back and F5’s Kane. Brock & UT slug it out, but Taker gets the big boot (called rather loudly). Brock accidentally almost dumps Taker, but pulls him back in, only to get tombstoned by Taker (badly). UT dumps Batista, then suckers Kane into an alliance and dumps him, too. Brock then weakly tosses UT to win the match at 53:47. God forbid they let anyone else look strong with Undertaker in there. Match was better than usual thanks to the stuff being done by the cannon fodder at the bottom, but once the stiffs started filing in around #25 it was downhill again, and really needed a stronger finish for Brock. Better than last year’s, at least. ***3/4

 

The Bottom Line:

 

They completely dropped the ball with Jericho, giving him a half-assed longevity push before weakly sacrificing him to Test. That’s the same kind of “good news/bad news” scenario that ran all through the Rumble match, as they had a chance to do big stuff and didn’t. Benoit/Angle pretty much saved the show, but as noted, they have nowhere left to go with Benoit without changing the title. And I’d pull out the Hot Pokers for HHH/Steiner, but I don’t think the feud needs anymore gay undertones.

 

Benoit/Angle is must-see, the Rumble is for fans only, and the the rest is pretty much must-miss. Thumbs in the middle.

[Guest Choken One]

OK GUYS SK said that This show wasn't bad...that means you assclowns can now say "I LOVED THIS RUMBLE!".

[Guest Coffey]

"Dawn comes back with a springboard clothesline that’s on par with Bull Buchanan’s. That’s not a compliment."

 

LMFAO!

 

"OK GUYS SK said that This show wasn't bad...that means you assclowns can now say "I LOVED THIS RUMBLE!"".

 

Nope, still sucked bawls.

 

"Here we go. He was gentle."

 

Yeah, except on the parts that sucked, like Steiner..

 

I was serious about not remembering what site he wrote for though. Could someone please remind me.

[Guest Anglesault]

411wrestling.com

[Guest Anglesault]

OK GUYS SK said that This show wasn't bad...

He said everything but Benoit/Angle is "must-miss" How the hell low are your standards?

[Guest RickyChosyu]

Looks like Scotty fired up his reviewing bong again. What a fucking crackhead. Seriously, unless his star ratings are on a ten star scale, he's out of his mind giving Angle/Benoit that rating. I'd be comical if I weren't too cranky to appreciate it.

[Guest Anglesault]

And you all say my standards are to high.

 

I guess I should wait to see the match.

[Guest Coffey]

Actually, I only thought that Angle/Benoit was about ***. The beginning was extremely slow. The "Rolling Germans" spot needs to be revamped somehow. Watching the same basic spots over and over again isn't too appealing by about the sixth time around. I didn't like how Benoit kept switching his psychology work from the leg to the shoulder though. Well, I guess he didn't do it too much, but the Ankle Lock was kindof random...

 

Still at only *** it was MotN by far, and thus far MotY..

[Guest MarvinisaLunatic]

So when can we can expect Steiner to be gone from the WWE ??

 

Im guessing tomorrow morning based on that review..

[Guest RenegadeX28]

The Rumble was ok. No doubt, the match of the night was Benoit and Angle. These guys NEVER have a bad match. The crowd helped this match come alive. It must have been a great moment for Benoit after that standing ovation. He deserved it.

 

 

WORST MATCH.....HHH vs Steiner.....

 

Those reports of Steiner getting tired during the match are so true. He couldn't pick up HHH for a double arm suplex! He kept doing the same damn moves (Belly to belly suplex). I don't know if the fans booed because of his wrestling, or because HHH was the face, or if Boston hates Steiner!

 

The Rumble match itself was not THE WORST EVER. Shannon's antics in the ring were mad funny. I was kinda hoping Taker would return the oldskool way, but he didn't.

[Guest The Old Me]

Anyhow obviously Brock won, not once, but TWICE!! -- for all the people who like Brock, sorry but this guy ain't GoldBerg.

Goldberg sucks, BTW.

[Guest The Mighty Damaramu]

OK GUYS SK said that This show wasn't bad...that means you assclowns can now say "I LOVED THIS RUMBLE!".

Umm.......just for the record I was saying I liked the show way before SK opened his fat trap.

[Guest RickyChosyu]

There's a difference between enjoying a match and giving it ****3/4 just because it's Angle and Benoit in there. I take that kind of rating seriously and save it for matches that deserve such priase. SKeith, simply, does not. For him, calling a spade a spade has taken a back seat to showing love for his favorites, and that kind of bias has no place in journalism, even if he does write for a place that employs Borash and other "writers."

 

That said, the match can still be considered a success. The body of the match was worthless, and the crowd was dead through most of it (understandable, considering the previous match) but the false finishes at the end drew the crowd in effectively and didn't let go. The countless submisions and high spots got big reactions and Benoit got a huge standing ovation after the match. Obviously, the WWE was expecting Steiner to get this reaction after his dominating performance to HHH, but instead he got a whole truck full of "get the fuck out of here" heat. Benoit, after jobbing clean, had the fans fully enamored with him.

[Guest bob_barron]

Dames gave the match 5*. I'm gonna have to wait for the DVD to properly rate it since it's hard to rate a match when you're watching it in a theatre full of Benoit marks.

 

Borash works for 411?? Damn- I've been kept out of the loop.

 

Calling it the worst rumble ever is just fucking ridicolous- remember 1999??

 

You're the one who kept saying how it was gonna suck so why did you order it in the first place?

 

The Final 4 was fine. Batista did nothing and the final 3 of BOD and Brock I thought was well booked.

 

Overall I enjoyed the show a lot as it was much better then Armageddon.

[Guest The Mighty Damaramu]

Eh......I'm at the point where I don't give a damn about star ratings. Let's put it this way. I really liked the Angle/Benoit match. I disliked the Steiner/HHH match. That's easy enough. To many debates happen over star ratings.

One person says "Dude that was a total 5-star match!"

"No dude it was a DUD!"

"No you guys need to watch this match to see a true 5-star performance!"

"No that match was terrible!"

"Actually I'd give it about 3-stars....."

See what I mean? Everyone has a different rating scale and NO MATTER how much you say there is there is not a universal rating scale. Fans have differing opinions. One man's garbage is another man's treasure. Remember that.

[Guest bob_barron]

Good point Dam. Star ratings are all subjective

[Guest RickyChosyu]

"Dames gave the match 5*. I'm gonna have to wait for the DVD to properly rate it since it's hard to rate a match when you're watching it in a theatre full of Benoit marks."

 

I'm not sure about how Dames usually writes his reviews, but SKieth's most annoying trait is his refusal to discuss the work and give us the *why* in regards to the rating. What made it recieve the rating that it did? How did it set itself so high above everything else you've seen in wrestling? Kieth has never bothered discusing these things in detail, either out of lazyness or inability to do so. I wouldn't have a problem with his opinions if he showed an effort to justify them.

 

"Borash works for 411?? Damn- I've been kept out of the loop."

 

I heard about it on tOA. He's already begun the NWA-TNA propoganda, too, claiming "buy rates are up 22%" without, you know, telling us what any of the buy rates were.

 

"Calling it the worst rumble ever is just fucking ridicolous- remember 1999??"

 

Yeah, I don't get this either. It was nothing too special, but the Matt and Shannon antics were great and even though the right and fucked it up, Jericho's run through most of it was great to watch. I laughed at the "Maven tries to elminate Taker again" moment, too. The final four sucked ass, Jericho and Booker should have gotten much more and the finish was terrible, but that's hardly grounds for Worse Rumble Ever. There have been much worse Rumbles, for sure, '99 being one of them.

[Guest The Mighty Damaramu]

Well it just annoys me how I'll say I like a match and you get all these guys saying things like "The WWE has never had a true 5-star match!" or "That match wasn't a classic. It was fun but not actually a good match."

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF THE WWE HAS NEVER HAD A 5-STAR MATCH! As far as I'm concerned there has never been a 5-star match because not everyone can agree on what makes a match a 5-star match. You have this group of people saying this, this group saying this, and Dave Meltzer rambling about something else! What because the match wasn't some kind of classic I'm not allowed to say "Wow that was a great match.....I enjoyed it a lot!" I've seen my fill of Puro, I've seen my feel of WWE, I've seen my fill of Indies, and I've seen my fill of WCW. And from all of them I have seen "great matches" but I will no longer rate them by stars. If someone asks "Dama....what'd you think of that match?" I'll say "It was pretty good. However I did not like...blah blah blah" I will not say "It was about ***1/4 stars b/c....."

I'm sorry I'm just starting to get really fed up with some people jumping on other people because they misplaced a fucking subjective system that all rely's on the opinion of the person who's rating it.

[Guest bob_barron]

"Dames gave the match 5*. I'm gonna have to wait for the DVD to properly rate it since it's hard to rate a match when you're watching it in a theatre full of Benoit marks."

 

I'm not sure about how Dames usually writes his reviews, but SKieth's most annoying trait is his refusal to discuss the work and give us the *why* in regards to the rating. What made it recieve the rating that it did? How did it set itself so high above everything else you've seen in wrestling? Kieth has never bothered discusing these things in detail, either out of lazyness or inability to do so. I wouldn't have a problem with his opinions if he showed an effort to justify them.

 

"Borash works for 411?? Damn- I've been kept out of the loop."

 

I heard about it on tOA. He's already begun the NWA-TNA propoganda, too, claiming "buy rates are up 22%" without, you know, telling us what any of the buy rates were.

 

"Calling it the worst rumble ever is just fucking ridicolous- remember 1999??"

 

Yeah, I don't get this either. It was nothing too special, but the Matt and Shannon antics were great and even though the right and fucked it up, Jericho's run through most of it was great to watch. I laughed at the "Maven tries to elminate Taker again" moment, too. The final four sucked ass, Jericho and Booker should have gotten much more and the finish was terrible, but that's hardly grounds for Worse Rumble Ever. There have been much worse Rumbles, for sure, '99 being one of them.

All Keith said was he didn't like some of the rest spots in the middle.

 

Even though you had to figure Angle would win- I was on the edge of my seat the whole match and the theatre was going crazy for every near fall. After the match everyone stood up and clapped.

 

Maven dropkicking Taker and then celebrating was hilarious. I also liked all the near eliminations throughout- even though I think at one point Jericho screwed up playing footsie and they ignored it.

 

And HBK getting outsmarted, getting the fuck beat out of him, bleeding and getting tossed out first??? Yea he semi got his heat back but seeing him look like a huge loser put a smile on my face.

[Guest RickyChosyu]

Well it just annoys me how I'll say I like a match and you get all these guys saying things like "The WWE has never had a true 5-star match!" or "That match wasn't a classic. It was fun but not actually a good match."

I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF THE WWE HAS NEVER HAD A 5-STAR MATCH! As far as I'm concerned there has never been a 5-star match because not everyone can agree on what makes a match a 5-star match. You have this group of people saying this, this group saying this, and Dave Meltzer rambling about something else! What because the match wasn't some kind of classic I'm not allowed to say "Wow that was a great match.....I enjoyed it a lot!" I've seen my fill of Puro, I've seen my feel of WWE, I've seen my fill of Indies, and I've seen my fill of WCW. And from all of them I have seen "great matches" but I will no longer rate them by stars. If someone asks "Dama....what'd you think of that match?" I'll say "It was pretty good. However I did not like...blah blah blah" I will not say "It was about ***1/4 stars b/c....."

I'm sorry I'm just starting to get really fed up with some people jumping on other people because they misplaced a fucking subjective system that all rely's on the opinion of the person who's rating it.

I should have made my post more clear. Like I just said, the thing that gripes me the most about Keith is his refusal to explain why his opinions are worth listening to. He just throws the ratings out there and expects them to be taken on face value, and I'm not the type of person to swallow that kind of thing. Meltzer is the same.

 

You're free to think whatever you want, but the writers that I trust are the ones willing to discuss a body of work in detail and give substantial explanations as to why it was at a certain levle of quality. I could pretty much care less about star ratings as long as I'm getting a decent explanation.

 

Personally, I found the Angle/Benoit match to be dissapointing. The body of the match did nothing for me, as they haven't really attempted to expand on the matwork they've used in the past and take it anywhere. In general, the opening portions seemed like filler. Nothing big happpened, and neither man did anything to try and win the match. It was worked in a "we can't try to win because it's just not time yet" manner, which I dislike. Benoit's working of the leg even though it never factored into the finish is the best example of this "fluf" that they used to fill up the body of the match. I wish that, instead of doing these lengthy false finish sequences at the end, they would use some of those spots in the body so that the overall match would be more ballanced.

 

Also, Benoit and Angle's selling was spotty as hell, as they would sell each other's holds like death while in them but forget all about them afterwards. This hurt the finish because Benoit hadn't sold the Ankle lock as a threat earlier and his tapping out felt flat. After the match he sold the ankle, but durring the match he decided against it in favor of hitting more high spots. The crowd got more high spots to pop for, but the psychology of the match was hurt.

 

My disliking for the "Battle of the Germans" spot also hurt the match. But then, they've used that before, so I expected it.

 

You're free to think whatever you want and I encourage you to decide for youserlf, but I think that these flaws make it impossible to rank that match as ****3/4. I save that for matches that are near-perfect. This match wasn't anywhere near perfect.