WCW WrestleWar 1991

[Guest TSMAdmin]

WCW WrestleWar 1991

 

I just have a couple of things to say before we get started. First of all, I think it is important to remind everyone that my birthday is exactly two weeks away, so you all know where to find the Amazon Wishlist. Secondly, I have been writing this damn review since Christmas Eve 2002. I finally finished it last night, January 31, 2003. As you could probably figure out, I’ve been busy lately. Generally I like to do a special birthday review, but at this rate the only way that will happen is if I review a one-hour show. I could do Best of the WWF Volume 2… we’ll see. Anyhow, take a deep breath because you are about to read the most entertaining 6,500 words on ‘net today. As always, feedback is nice and the link is at the bottom of the review. Also check out my tape reviewing counterparts, Peter Kostka and Jeremy Wall’s respective Backlash 1999 and ECW Deep Impact reviews.

 

WCW WrestleWar 1991

February 24, 1991 in Phoenix, Arizona

Memorial Coliseum drawing 6,800 ($53,000)

Shown live on PPV (1.2)

 

Tony Schiavone runs down the big matches (Hansen-Vader, Luger-Spivey, Freebirds-Doom, and the WarGames). He sends us down to JR and DUSTY~~!!. I think those two have to be THE odd couple of wrestling.

 

WCW Six Man Tag-Team Titles: Junkyard Dog, Ricky Morton & Tommy Rich vs. State Patrol & The Big Cat

State Patrol consists of Buddy Lee Parker and James Earl Wright (?). The Big Cat went on to be Mr. Hughes in the WWF. JYD and Big Cat start. JYD with his usual weak offense. Wright and Morton both tag in. The faces knock JEW down with a double back elbow. Morton uses a whole lot of armdrags. Rich tags in and more of the same. JEW puts an end to that with an eye poke. Parker comes in and misses an elbow drop. Tommy Rich takes advantage and goes to work on his arm. DUSTY-ISM #1: "I'll tell ya what, dey all former state patrollers. I heard dey arrestin' people at will even though dey aren't state patrollers right now." Morton is back, but gets caught in the corner when Parker pounds the shit out of him. Morton comesback with an inverted atomic drop. JEW runs in and gets the same. JYD and Big Cat both come in. HOSS WAR BABY!! The crowd is actually getting relatively excited for this. Test of strength follows. JYD breaks with some headbutts. Cat with an eye rake and an elbow drop for 2. Parker gets the tag as JR and Dusty compare JYD to George Foreman. Parker holds Morton in backbreaker position, so JEW can deliver a falling headbutt from the top for 2. Parker gets 2 off some more double teaming. Cat tags, drops an elbow and covers for 2. Sloppy dropkick gets 2. Parker is in. State Patrol with a battering ram ala the Bushwhackers. Parker catches Morton with a bulldog, JEW covers him for 2. More doubleteam stuff until Morton comes off the top with a crossbody, but gets caught with a backbreaker from Big Cat. Morton gets triple teamed in the heel corner. Parker applies a chinlock. Morton makes a comeback after Parker misses the blind charge. JYD makes the luke-warm tag. Headbutts for everyone. JYD delivers the Big Thump on Parker. Big Cat breaks up the pin. The illegal Morton covers for 3. (9:54) * The titles should have been held up after that miscarriage of justice. Well, considering they were forgotten about in a matter of weeks it probably doesn't really matter. Very boring match. What was the point of Rich being there? The guy spent all of 20 seconds in the ring.

 

Schiavone is with Terrence (Terry) Taylor and Alexandra York (Terri Runnels). Alexandra hypes the York Foundation and says that they are looking for new wrestlers. According to her computer, Taylor will beat Tom Zenk in less than 15 minutes and 28 seconds. I'm sure that the computer factored in that no decent booker would give those two any more than 10 minutes on a PPV.... Oh yeah, this is WCW. By the way, Terri sucked with a mic back in 1991 too. 0/1

 

Brad Armstrong vs. Bobby Eaton

I always liked Brad Armstrong, who is without a doubt the best wrestler in his family. It's interesting seeing how WCW buried him with so many ridiculous gimmicks considering he was a pretty big deal during the end of the regional days. It looks like right now he is nothing more than good ol' southern boy Brad Armstrong, or maybe he is supposed to be a patriot with that little American flag on his tights. Not to worry though, the days of Arachnaman aren't very far away. JR mentions that Brad's younger brother (Jesse James) is fighting in Desert Storm and that a copy of this PPV will be sent to all the troops. It's cool that WCW did stuff like that. Eaton was working as a heel here, but the crowd seems to be split 50/50 between these two. Eaton quickly attacks. Armstrong slows him down with a flying headscissors and going to work on the arm. Armstrong gets thrown to the floor. He recoups though and sends Eaton to the rail and then the post. Eaton is rolled back in, where Armstrong is back on the arm. Eaton reaches the ropes. Would someone care to explain to me why JR is running down every rule in professional wrestling (10 count, rope break, etc.)? Maybe he doesn't think Dusty is worth conversing with. Test of strength follows. Eaton takes control with a low kick. Armstrong powers out and comes off the top with a crossbody for 2. Eaton fights out of an armbar with a BIG right in the corner. Eaton attempts a slingshot suplex, but Armstrong counters WHILE in the air. I love that move. Armstrong goes back to the arm, so we get to catch a glimpse of Jason Hervey in the crowd. Eaton blocks a rollup and hits a stiff clothesline for 2. Eaton with a sweet (not Stan) backbreaker for 2. IT'S..CHINLOCK...TIME, so lets go to the Great Muta in the crowd. JR uses this opportunity to hype the upcoming WCW-NJPW shows. Dusty gets excited after taking into consideration how much sushi he will be able to eat in Japan, IF YOU WEEEEEEEEEELLL. Eaton gets 2 off a slingshot backbreaker. Bobby applies a camel clutch. Being the impatient guy that he is, Eaton dumps Armstrong to the floor. Armstrong gets dropped across the railing. Back in, Bobby pulls out an abdominal stretch with assistance from the top rope. He gets caught and we have ourselves a slugfest. Eaton misses a blind charge and ends up in the bronco buster position. Armstrong mounts a comeback with a dropkick followed up by a side russian legsweep. Brad covers...but Eaton gets his foot on the rope. Eaton connects with a neckbreaker. Armstrong is put away with the Tennessee Jam. (12:51) **3/4 I really like both of the wrestlers here, but this match was a little on the slow side. Armstrong could have put on a much better performance had he not been grounded by Eaton for majority of the match.

 

JR, "WCW SuperBrawl is on the way. Here's more about it...” This graphic follows:

 

WCW SUPERBRAWL MAY 19th

ONLY ON PAY PER VIEW

 

I feel enlightened.

 

Miss A & Miki Handa vs. Itsuki Yamazaki & Mami Kitimura

Dusty tells us right off the bat that he will only be calling Miss A's moves. Can't really blame him there. For you Joshi fans out, Miss A is AKA Dynamite Kansai. I had to watch this match twice in order to figure out who was who due to JR not naming any of them for about half of the match and then forgets who's who every other second. Miss A can best be described as a female HOSS, or HOSSETTE. No wonder she is only a "Miss". Obviously this match is also only on here to promote the upcoming WCW-NJPW events. A handshake that seems innocent kicks us of until Miss A and Handa jump Itsuki and Mami. Due to that act Miss A's team will be dubbed the heels during all double team sequences. The faces comeback as Itsuki pulls out a mexican armdrag on Miss A. Itsuki gets 2 off a moonsault from the top. Mami tags in and gets the shit kicked out of her. We're talking Low Ki`/Tajiri style here. Handa gets the tag and delivers a backdrop for 2. JR compares the ladies to Russian gymnast. Miss A is back with a german suplex for 2. She works on Mami's thighs and comes off the second rope with an elbow drop. Itsuki gets the tag and gets 2 from a double underhook suplex. Mami comes in. She delivers a belly to back suplex for 2 as Handa makes the save. Handa makes the blind tag. Meanwhile, Dusty attempts to set JR up on a date with Miss A. Considering JR's hard-on for big guys, he probably likes the same trait in his women, so I can see how Dusty is trying to be of help to him. Handa with an inside cradle for 2. Suplex also gets 2. Mami pulls out a bulldog. DUSTY-ISM #2: "She must have been training with Dustin Rhodes, my son." Itsuki is in with a gutwrench suplex for 2. Miss A get the tag and hits at least a dozen stiff kicks. Test of strength. Ituski escapes with a sunset flip, which Miss A counters for a near fall. Miss A with another near fall after a bridged northern lights suplex. A belly to back suplex gets 2. Handa tags and catches Itsuki with a fisherman's suplex for 2. Mami and "She's a solid lady" Miss A are back. The heels double team with clotheslines and suplexes. Mami with a quick tag to Itsuki, who flies off the top with a missile dropkick to both heels. GOOD GOLLY MISS MOLLY!! Itsuki holds Miss A in place for a clothesline off the top from Mami for 2. Miss A comesback with a clothesline. She covers, but Itsuki gets her foot on the rope. Itsuki wins it with a roll up out of nowhere. That was quite abrupt. (6:47) ***1/2 Very good match here, although the crowd could give a damn. It's funny how when you watch Joshi matches the fact that the competitors are women doesn't even phase you, whereas in the WWE it is impossible to look past that. I guess that may have to do with the looks of the WWE divas as compared to the Joshi chicks and vice versa when it comes to in-ring skills.

 

Tony is with Missy Hyatt. Missy promises to go in the guy's locker room and get an interview with "a babe". Tony goes on about how a woman has never been interviewed a man in the men's locker room before in any sport. Considering Missy is looking to get with a babe, I'm predicting that she notices that no one meets those credentials in the locker room, so instead she strolls down to ringside and gets a word with DUSTY~~!! 0/2

 

Buddy Landell vs. Dustin Rhodes

Surprisingly, although I am a HUGE Goldust fan, I really don't like Dustin Rhodes. Landell has an interesting history. Like Brad Armstrong, Buddy was a big name during the territorial days. Once he joined the NWA, things didn't really go his way. The man swears up and down that he was indeed scheduled to win the NWA World Championship from Ric Flair in a feud over who was the real "Nature Boy", but due to his own personal demons, he never won the title. No one else has ever confirmed that story, so who knows. Buddy's biggest accomplishment was probably winning the National Title. Once his WCW stay was over, he became an SMW mainstay and went on to job to Ahmed Johnson on a WWF PPV. Nowadays, Budro is one of God's children if you catch my drift. To the match, Landell plays some mind games by slapping Dustin around. Dustin fires back with some rights and a backbody drop for 2. Landell does the old "hide behind the ref" spot. Dustin pulls out the 10 bionic elbows in the corner while Dusty is screaming, "PUMP IT BABY!! PUMP IT BABY!! DAT'S HEREDITARY!!". Dustin works on the arm. Landell fights out only to get caught up top and slammed back to the mat. DUSTY-ISM #3: "When you take a dawwwg in da corner, you have to be careful dat it don't B-B-B-B-BITE yah!" He actually stuttered that many times. Dustin charges to the corner, where his shoulder collides with the post. More enthralling brawling from Landell. Landell applies a wristlock, the crowd replies with some "LANDELL SUCKS" chants. Landell gets a couple of nearfalls as they botch a fucking irish whip. Landell puts on the sleeper. Dustin counters with one of his own. The real turning point comes when Budro misses the blind charge and is clotheslined over the top. Isn't that grounds for a DQ? Dustin rolls him back in. He follows up with a military press slam (haven't seen him do that before) and a bulldog for 3. (6:33) 3/4* Very boring match. The next one doesn't look too promising either.

 

Tony sends us to Missy Hyatt. Missy enters the men's dressing locker room and immediately runs into Stan Hansen. Hansen, with tobacco juice dripping from his mouth all over his body, chases Missy and tells her to "get her big ass out". The sight of a disgusting Stan Hansen running Missy Hyatt out of a locker room is always going to be mildly entertaining. 0.5/3

 

Royal Family vs. Young Pistols

JR hypes this as an important ranking match for both teams. Meanwhile Dusty discusses the depth of WCW's tag division. The Royal Family consists of Jack Victory and Rip Morgan, whereas the Young Pistols AKA the Southern Boys are Tracy Smothers and Steve Armstrong. The Royal Family jumps the pretty boys. The Pistols do a little dosey-doe action and end up getting clotheslined. Armstrong crossbodys both Morgan and Victory from the top. Stereo dropkicks follow as the lights go out. We are stuck with the house lights for about a minute. Morgan and Smothers do the usual armbars and restholds that have been featured in every damn match on this show. That goes on for a decent amount of time until finally Armstrong gets the tag. More dropkicks from the faces. Victory comes in and now Armstrong gets to work the arm. That sentence actually sounded clever with the "Arm" and "arm" references.... Yes, this match is the epitome of boredom. Headlocks follow. Tracy with the blind tag. He delivers a flying shoulderblock for 2. The crowd actually pops for a twisting armbar?? Considering there has yet to have been one meaningful match on this card I can't really blame them. Steve-O tags back in. This is the point in the match where the Royal Family controls for about seven minutes with their own plodding double team moves. I'll just gloss over most of it to save you your sanity. There is a Rosie O'Donell look-a-like in the crowd just fatter and right behind her is a skinny, toothless version of Jimmy Hart. WCW sure did draw some winners, eh? OK, we are now eleven minutes into this match. Morgan and Victory are STILL sucking up the joint. They pick up Smothers for a double suplex, but Steve dropkicks Jack Victory. Smothers falls on top of Morgan to mercifully end this match. (12:05) 1/2* The replay clearly shows Morgan pulling Smothers by the tights to ensure that he falls on top. It also bothers me that Morgan was essentially 100%, so why couldn't he kick out? I probably shouldn't ask that and just be happy that this is finally over. Now the match itself wasn't really offensive, but I'm starting to get fucking bored out of my mind with all these filler matches. Especially since all of them use the exact same sequences over and over again. FUCK A DUCK WCW. FUCK A GODDAMN DUCK. Yet, that last line was included for a handful of special people. You know who you are.

 

Tony the bitch is with the Freebird's manager Diamond Dallas Page. DDP cuts a pretty good promo on how the Birds have been overlooked by WCW and how he tricked Teddy Long into giving them a Tag Title match later. Long comes down to join the party. He does the whole "I thought we were friends" spiel and ends by saying that contrary to popular belief Doom will not be splitting tonight. Did I mention how I much I love the new Theodore Long/D-Lo Brown combination. Sure it could be considered offensive by some, but I'm digging the fact that D-Lo is actually being utilized and that finally Teddy has made his triumphant return to managing. 1.5/4

 

No Disqualification Match: Terrence Taylor w/Alexandra York vs. Z-Man

Alexandra's hair scares me. Think Luna, just very red. These two guys had built up a mini-feud after three indecisive matches, which is reason for this stipulation. Taylor starts the match with the usual cowardly heel antics. Some shoving and slapping results. The "Computerized" Terry Taylor reminds me of Chris Nowinski. After a pep talk with Alex, Taylor connects with a sucker punch. Zenk retaliates, so Terry seeks refuge yet again. He comes back in the ring and sells the punch some more. Zenk takes him down with a side headlock and gets 2. Dusty names Taylor and Bobby Eaton the breakout stars of 1991, which is funny considering they already had their own respective breakout years in the 80s. Zenk gets a few more nearfalls. Taylor leaves again. This time to consult Alexandra's computer, this way he could plan out his next attack. What an enthralling gimmick those two had. It seems like the computer called for a slugfest, because that's what we get. Zenk with the BIG BAAAACKBODY for 2 and goes back to the headlock. Zenk does a little acid drop action while keeping the hold on. Taylor tries some headbutts, which prompts Dusty to say, "I wonder if dats from the computer...” How can anyone not love Dusty? Taylor follows up with a belly to back... and look at, Nikita Koloff is in the crowd, a point which will matter more a little later. Of course his appearance cues Dusty to get all nostalgic. Oh yeah, there's still a match going on. Taylor sends Z-Man to the rail and chokes him with the camera cable. Back in, Z-Man starts to get some momentum behind him, but Terry puts an end to that with an eye poke. Taylor catches him with a backbreaker. He covers, but Zenk gets his foot on the rope. Z-Man comesback with a sunset for 2. Taylor applies a camel clutch. OMG WHAT THE FUCK, Hiro Matsuda is in the crowd. OK! We get, WCW is doing a PPV with New Japan. You can stop promoting it now. Zenk clotheslines Taylor over the top rope. JR makes a point to mention that he was allowed to do that since this is a No DQ match. Then what the hell was the reason everyone else and their mother already did that exact same move today and got away with it? Taylor pulls Zenk to the floor. Zenk once again goes facefirst to the rail. Taylor rolls him back in and gets 2. Taylor with a few more nearfalls. Zenk hits a neckbreaker out of nowhere. He follows up with a STIFF Superkick for 2. That was more Sweet Face Music, than Sweet Chin Music. Maybe that was a subtle hint that WCW will be doing a PPV in Japan soon thereafter. Zenk with a powerslam for 2. He connects with an enziguri. Zenk flies off the top with a crossbody, but Alexandra has the ref's attention. Meanwhile Dusty screams "DAT'S NOT IN DA COMPUTER!!!" Zenk is pissed at the ref, so Taylor rolls him up for 3 while using the tights for leverage. (10:59) *** Post-match antics include Z-Man sending Taylor to the floor with an atomic drop. Fun match, nothing special.

 

Speaking of offensive, yet enjoyable angles... Paul E. Dangerously strolls down to the ring in a "Three Amigos" outfit, complete with sombrero. "I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is my name is Paul E. Dangerously and this is the Danger Zone. The bad news is that I work undercover for immigration and all you illegal aliens are under arrest, so take your velvet painting collections and refried beans back to Mexico! Ladies, gentlemen, and illegal immigrants... this is EL GIGANTE!!" El Gigante joins Paul in the ring. Well, at least he isn't wrestling tonight. Paul waves his red cape around the ring while yelling "OLAY!!". He attempts to teach the simpleton Gigante some words like "jerk" or "jerko" for the Spaniards. "Don't you be looking behind me. I know that's what all you Latinos do." Dangerously accuses Gigante of wanting to steal the Title from Flair. All Gigante responds with is "No hablo englese." Paul gets fed up and throws his sombrero in Gigante's face. Not smart as Paul gets slammed as a result. Dusty, "I love dem Latino people." Funny shit here. 2.5/5

 

Tony is back... yet again... with Hiro Matsuda and Great Muta. Take a guess as to what they discuss. Muta mists into the air. Too bad he didn't spray Tony. 2.5/6

 

Return Grudge Match: Stan Hansen vs. Big Van Vader

Finally, after 1 hour and 30 minutes the filler matches have come to an end. Stan Hansen has to be one of the most disgusting people I have ever seen. He has a HUGE wad of chewing tobacco hanging out of his mouth, which in turn has dripped all over his chest. Vader is sporting his ridiculous steaming alien/samurai helmet. Hansen "dives" over the top rope as Vader makes his way down the ramp, but is caught in a bearhug. In the ring, Vader connects with a MEGA STIFF clothesline. He pummels Hansen and covers for 2. An avalanche gets 2 as well. Both guys are blown up, so IT'S... CHINLOCK... TIME! Hansen's tobacco is scattered all around the ring. Stan gets sent to the floor. Vader comes off the apron with a body splash. Back in, Hansen turns the tides with a belly to back. Some elbows and forearms get 2. They end up on the floor again, when Hansen hits Vader with a crate. The two duel with plastic chairs. All this plunder is getting Dusty excited. Vader drapes Hansen over the railing. He drops an elbow to Stan's ribs. Vader goes back in the ring, but is instantaneously pulled back out by Hansen. Hansen follows up by sending Vader to the wooden steps. Back in, they slug it out on their knees. The late Pee-Wee Anderson tries to break it up, but is thrown to the floor. He DQs both guys. (6:21) *3/4 What the fuck? They could use chairs, the steps and a crate, but a slugfest needs to be broken up. Vader isn't done yet though. He flies off the top with a clothesline. The crowd is heavily behind the supposed heel Vader. Vader misses a splash. Hansen gets his bullrope and chokes him with it. Vader gains control of the rope and drags Hansen to the back by the neck. As usual with these types of matches, the post match activity is better than the match itself. Even for 1991 this stuff was a little subdued. I mean compare it to some of the brutal NWA hardcore matches.

 

The same SuperBrawl "promo" as before airs again. Still none of that information JR promised has been revealed.

 

WCW United States Title: Lex Luger vs. Dan Spivey

Dan Spivey is one of those guys that everyone thought would make it, but just never did. Prior to wrestling he played for the New York Jets. The earliest match I saw of his was when he competed in the WrestleMania 2 Battle Royal. Spivey entered the NWA in 1989. His first real success was as a member of the Skyscrapers, which consisted of himself and Sid Vicious managed by Teddy Long. He got injured though and Mark Callous AKA The Undertaker replaced him. Spivey was out for a few months, started a quasi-feud with Luger and thus we have this match. Feeling out process to kick this one off. Spivey throws the first punch. Luger retaliates with a backbody. Spivey attempts an atomic drop, which Luger blocks and counters with a belly to belly suplex. Spivey charges, but gets a boot in the face. Spivey ducks a crossbody, causing Luger to fly over the top into the other ring that would be used for the War Games match later on. Dan suplexes him back in. Spivey pulls out a Tombstone Piledriver (!) for 2. A Rude Awakening follows for 2. The camera practically zooms in as Spivey tells Luger the next few spots. You couldn't hear him, but it was visible. A DDT also gets 2. It's so strange to see Spivey use actual wrestling moves. He was typically just a generic big guy. Luger tries to mount a comeback, but is knocked down with a headbutt. A running clothesline in the corner gets 2. Luger moves out the way with a second clothesline and rolls him up for 2. Spivey is right back on him though with some kicks to the back. Luger blocks a suplex and hits one of his own. Spivey is the first one up. He slams Lex and proceeds to hit an elbow drop off the top (!!) for 2. That actually looked devastating. Spivey keeps the pressure on with a swinging neckbreaker, which results in another nearfall. Dan applies a head scissors to continue working the neck. A big boot gets 2. Luger tries blocking a piledriver to no avail. Lex starts to hulk up by no-selling some punches. Spivey is all NO POBO to that as he connects with a belly to belly. A long chinlock follows, but it does actually fit into the psychology of the match, so I can't really complain. Luger elbows his way out. Once again Spivey puts an end to Luger's second wind, this time with a fucking Japanese armdrag. Luger catches Spivey with a hot shot, which causes Dan to fall over the top on to the apron. Once again JR mentions that it would have been a DQ is Luger intentionally threw Spivey over the top. WCW, the company that couldn't keep track of it's own rules. Luger flies off the second rope with a clothesline. A powerslam follows. The crowd is HOT for the first time all night. Spivey shoots Luger to the floor. Lex attempts a sunset flip, but Spivey punches him in the face. Double clothesline spot. They both shoulderblock each other as well. Luger gets caught up top and slammed to the mat, but he rolls through into an inside cradle for the win. (12:52) **** Great match from two guys that rarely even have good matches. I don't know what the hell got into Spivey, but he had his working boots on tonight. Some great psychology in the middle, but it never played a role in the match once Luger made his Superman comeback. As for the finish itself, I'm shocked it hasn't been repeated numerous times. It really caught me off guard to see Luger roll through like that. Lastly, Dan Spivey all but disappeared a few months after this match. He resurfaced as Waylon Mercy in 1995 with the WWF. Mercy had a fucking awesome gimmick where he would calmly enter the ring. Shake the ref's hand, shake his opponent's hand then whoop the poor guy's ass. Mercy even had the whole psycho look going on with the receding hairline and long black hair, not to mention the tattoo in-between his eyes. As a matter of fact, the current Nathan Jones character is a variation of Waylon Mercy's.

 

Remember I told you to keep in mind that Nikita Koloff was in the crowd, well that was because he is here to present Lex Luger with the new United States Championship belt, which would replace the old NWA version. Instead of handing Luger the belt, Koloff nails him with it. Tony asks the inevitable, "Why, Nikita, why?" Koloff goes on about how he has been retired for two years and finally he got sick of Luger being the Champion. Reason being, Luger beat him for the belt in 1987 by dubious circumstances. Keep in mind, this is back when Luger was in the Horsemen. All of this makes sense on the outside, but what I want to know is why it took Koloff 4 years to get revenge. The guy was still actively wrestling in 1989. He would have had plenty of time to regain the title. Either way, it seems like all his pent up anger and frustration finally came to a head once Luger was a very over babyface with the US Title. How convenient. Surprisingly, Nikita didn't look half-bad during this whole segment. The really amazing thing about this angle was that WCW had just started a feud with instant heat that easily could have co-main evented the next PPV. Who wants to guess whom Nikita and Luger fought at SuperBrawl? Fine, I'll tell you. Luger had a high profile match with Sting against the Steiners and Koloff was involved in a filler match against Tommy Rich. Did Luger ever fight Koloff on PPV? Of course not, this is WCW we are talking about. 3.5/7

 

The Freebirds accompanied by DDP and The Diamond Dolls come down to the ring for the next match, but first DDP has a little business to take of. He admits that managing the Freebirds is a handful, so he recruited Bid Daddy Dink to take over as their "road manager". Just seeing Oliver Humperdink dressed like the roadie from This is Spinal Tap makes this deserving of a point. 4.5/8

 

WCW Tag-Team Titles: Doom w/Teddy Long vs. The Freebirds w/Big Daddy Dink

Dusty is still heated about the dastardly act his old friend Nikita commited. I guess this anger is what leads Dust to call the black Diamond Doll "Brown Sugar". This is pre Badstreet days, so the Freebirds only consist of Michael P.S. Hayes and Jimmy Garvin. Doom is of course Ron Simmons and Butch Reed. Simmons starts by pushing Hayes around. He catches Hayes with a bearhug into a spinebuster for 2. Simmons misses the blind charge. Hayes catches him with a bulldog for 2. Simmons returns the favor with a powerslam. For no apparent reason Garvin flies off the top into a Simmons powerslam. Simmons covers and the ref actually counts. What an idiot. Dink calms his guys down outside the ring. "FREEBIRDS SUCK" chant starts up. Both Garvin and Reed tag in. Garvin gets a nearfall with a sunset flip and tags Hayes back in. Hayes makes a blind tag right before getting military press slammed. Reed attempts the same on Garvin, but P.S. makes the save. This doesn't phase Reed who continues his assault with a backbreaker and a double underhook suplex. Simmons gets the tag and drops a few falling headbutts. Garvin is thrown to the floor, where Reed slams him. Back in, Reed tags in, but gets caught with a sweet DDT from Garvin. Simmons tags and hits a spinebuster for 2 as Hayes saves. He follows up with a cool powerslam, which is also broken up by Hayes. Long throws Reed a pair of brass knux. Reed swings at Garvin, who ducks, and ends up nailing Simmons. Meanwhile, Dink distracts the ref and then pushes Garvin on top of Simmons for the titles. (6:56) **1/2 DDP and the Dolls celebrate on the entrance ramp. Simmons shoves Long. Reed takes offense to this and beats Ron's ass with the knux. Long gets a few shots in as well. This match was interesting in the sense that it was heels vs. heels. Whenever you have a heel vs. heel match, one of the participants has to play the role of the face. Interestingly, the fans chose Doom to be the faces, yet the match booked Doom as the heels. Some good heat and decent action made this a pretty good match. All was for naught though since the Freebirds had already lost the Titles a week earlier on a TV taping to the Steiner Brothers. Gotta love WCW, eh?

 

That damned SuperBrawl promo is shown AGAIN. At least they moved past hyping the NJPW-WCW PPV.

 

JR and Dusty interview a 12 year old boy that won some sweepstakes. JR asks him who his favorite team in the War Games is. The kid obviously misunderstands the question and says Doom. JR, "Doom is your favorite team? Well, I don't think they’re gonna be a team for much longer." The way Ross said that was fucking great. WCW is really outdoing itself with some of these extra segments. The general trend seems to be that the ones without Tony are the best. 5.5/9

 

JR and Dusty commentate over an angle on Saturday Night, where The Horsemen assaulted Brian Pillman and beat the shit out of his shoulder. 6/10

 

War Games: Ric Flair, Barry Windham, Sid Vicious & Larry Zbysko w/An Anderson vs. Sting, Brian Pillman & The Steiner Brothers

Zbysko is filling in for an injured Double A. Pillman has his shoulder taped up due to the previous night's beating. The heels decide on Windham to enter first. While the faces are conversing, Pillman bolts in the ring because he wants revenge BAH GAWD! Schiavone is doing the ring announcing for the War Games this year.

 

Period 1: Barry Windham vs. Brian Pillman

The first period lasts five minutes, then we have the cointoss to determine which team gets the advantage. From there the periods are two minutes each until everyone has entered. Pillman completely dismantles Barry with a flying clothesline, some mule kicks, a flying headsicssors and a missile dropkick from the second rope. Keep in mind, Pillman can't stand straight up on the top rope because the cage is quite short. Pillman goes for a crossbody, but Windham ducks. Just when it looks like Barry will be taking control, Pillman low blows him. Windham is sent facefirst to the cage for a big POP. Pillman follows up by ramming him 10 more times into it, which leads to our first gusher. Pillman continues to control with a jawbreaker and a clothesline from the top. Windham is thrown clear over both top ropes into the second ring. HOLY SHIT that is a lot of blood. JR is going nuts as 1 minute remains in the period. Pillman counters a piledriver with a backbody drop. He closes off the period with a punch from the top.

 

Anderson squares off with Sting for the coin toss. The Horsemen win.

 

Period 2: Barry Windham & Ric Flair vs. Brian Pillman

Flair strikes from behind. A wicked chopfest ensues. Flair tries backing off from Pillman. Meanwhile, Windham attacks Brian. While Barry rams Pillman's shoulder into the cage Flair taunts Sting. They continue to keep the pressure on his shoulder with some double teaming.

 

Period 3: Barry Windham & Ric Flair vs. Brian Pillman & Sting

Sting enters and beats the living hell out of Flair and Windham. This match has fucking unbelievable heat. Sting bulldogs both heels. Windham crotches Pillman on the top rope. Elsewhere, Sting no-sells Flair's chops. Flair backs into the corner and receives the Stinger Splash.

 

Period 4: Barry Windham, Ric Flair & Larry Zbysko vs. Brian Pillman & Sting

Sting is just all over Larry as he hits a plancha over one ring into the other. This is fucking great stuff. Pillman puts a Figure Four on Windham. Larry stomps a mudhole in Sting. Flair saves Windham with a stomp to Pillman's shoulder. Sting is back in control choking Larry. Flair delivers a few kneedrops to Pillman's injured shoulder.

 

Period 5: Barry Windham, Ric Flair, & Larry Zbysko vs. Brian Pillman, Sting & Rick Steiner

Steinerlines for both Flair and Windham. Rick with the 10 punch on Flair in the corner. Sting and Windham pair off, as do Pillman and Zbysko. Flair gets caught with a belly to belly suplex. Steiner proceeds to grind Flair's face into the steel mesh, drawing blood. Windham beats Sting into the cage; Steiner does the same to Flair. Larry has Pillman stuck in the tree of woe.

 

Period 6: Barry Windham, Ric Flair, Larry Zbysko & Sid Vicious vs. Brian Pillman, Sting & Rick Steiner

Sid goes right for Steiner. He and Flair doubleteam Rick. Pillman saves by sending Flair to the cage. Zbysko stiffly sends Rick to the cage. Steiner no-sells and returns the favor. Sting dumps Sid over the top rope. Steiner KOs Larry with a right. Sid knocks Pillman and Steiner out with a double noggin knocker. Sting throws Flair into the cage and we get our first Flair Flop of the night.

 

Period 7: Barry Windham, Ric Flair, Larry Zbysko & Sid Vicious vs. Brian Pillman, Sting & The Steiner Brothers

THE MATCH BEYOND HAS BEGUN!! Scott charges right into Flair and Windham with clotheslines. He catches Larry with a double underhook powerbomb. The cameraman is right next to Sid as he calls a spot with Rick. Rick whips Sid into a clothesline from Scott off the top. Stinger Splash for Flair, followed up by the Scorpion Deathlock. Larry breaks the hold. Sid continues working over Pillman's shoulder and goes on to pull off the tape. One way or another, the faces get Figure Fours on all the heels. JR is screaming "SUBMIT OR SURRENDER". Every fan is this building is on their feet going wild. The heels break the holds with eye pokes. Sting military presses Flair into the cage a few times and then slams him. Sid hits Rick with a nasty clothesline. Windham joins Sid in beating down Rick. Pillman steps on Zbysko's face and presses it up against the cage, but Larry won't give in. Flair and Pillman chop it out some more. Fatigue has definitely set in by this point. Sid picks up Pillman for a powerbomb, but since the cage is so short he can't lift Brian all the way up and ends up just dropping him on his neck and head. That looked VERY ugly. Sid delivers yet another powerbomb. Thankfully the second one wasn't as sickening. Either way, I think the point got across the first time. El Gigante runs down, rips the door off the cage and gives up for the unconscious Pillman. (21:50) ****1/4 Some people say that the Gigante run-in was improvised due to Pillman's injury, but it happened way too quickly. Honestly, Gigante of all people can't run THAT fast. Gigante was probably scheduled to run in after the powerbomb to call the match anyway. It just seemed improvised since the powerbomb was botched. The match itself was great up until the end where everything fell apart. The wrestlers were just to tired to keep running on all cylinders which is more than understandable. Shave the last few minutes off, keep Gigante off my TV, and you have a ***** match right there.

 

JR and Dusty ask Nick Patrick why he called the match... I don't think that question really needed an answer. Our lovely commentators say goodbye and promote the next PPV. 6/11

 

THIS IS IT

WrestleWar is one of those PPVs that is utterly worthless for the first two hours, but two great matches at the end redeem the show. Honestly, the show itself was long and quite boring, so I can't whole-heartedly recommend it. Although, if you enjoy Joshi there is that very good match in the beginning of the show. Everything else on the undercard was hit or miss. Majority of which missed. Check this show out just for the War Games and US Title match. If you want to keep your sanity, fast forward just about everything else.

 

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