Top 16 Reasons Why Batman Isn't Cool Anymore

[Rob E Dangerously 0]

Copied from the WrestlingClassics messege board:

 

16. He took out the Bat-Shark Repellent from his utility belt and replaced it with Viagra.

 

15. It's been a steady decline for Bruce Wayne ever since he switched to the Gotham Badass gimmick.

 

14. He won't let his sidekick listen to ROBIN TROWER on the Batmobile's 8-track deck.

 

13. Refuses to put over Joker and Riddler only will job to Superman.

 

12. Hardly ever defends the Bat Utility Belt.

 

11. In a drunken state, drops his tights, motions to his crotch and says "How's this for a bat signal?"

 

10. He still won't elevate Robin

 

9. When he shows up at a crime scene, everyone starts yelling "BRUUUUUUUUUUUCE!"

 

8. It's hard for masked babyfaces to get over in Gotham City.

 

7. POW!, CRASH!, and ZOWIE! are no longer enough to cover all the blown spots during his hardcore matches with The Penguin's henchmen.

 

6. He was busted on The Gotham Turnpike, where he was weaving and sharing a 12 pack with The Riddler.

 

5. Citizens of Gotham got tired of his "Tonight will be the greatest night in the history of crime fighting" hype week after week.

 

4. Rumors began to circulate after he wouldn't join Catwoman's "Kiss My Ass" club.

 

3. Everyone knows Alfred is the real shooter of the stable.

 

2. People grew tired of him posting drunk and starting flame wars on www.crimefightingclassics.com .

 

And the number one reason why Batman isn't cool anymore...

 

He stopped selling in the cliffhangers after he started dating the commissioner's daughter.

 

----

 

Hehehe.. I felt like sharing that with you all.

[Guest DrTom]

OMG BATMAN = HHH~!!!!11!!

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

...

 

Rob you just made it to Number 1 on my Internet Hitlist.

 

Ra's Al-Ghul and the League of Assassins should be at your place momentarily.

[Guest Sassquatch]

It's from Wrestling Classics.

 

Of course it is going to be bad.

 

The site is a total joke.

[Guest starvenger]

Copied from the WrestlingClassics messege board:

 

16. He took out the Bat-Shark Repellent from his utility belt and replaced it with Viagra.

 

15. It's been a steady decline for Bruce Wayne ever since he switched to the Gotham Badass gimmick.

 

14. He won't let his sidekick listen to ROBIN TROWER on the Batmobile's 8-track deck.

 

13. Refuses to put over Joker and Riddler only will job to Superman.

 

12. Hardly ever defends the Bat Utility Belt.

 

11. In a drunken state, drops his tights, motions to his crotch and says "How's this for a bat signal?"

 

10. He still won't elevate Robin

 

9. When he shows up at a crime scene, everyone starts yelling "BRUUUUUUUUUUUCE!"

 

8. It's hard for masked babyfaces to get over in Gotham City.

 

7. POW!, CRASH!, and ZOWIE! are no longer enough to cover all the blown spots during his hardcore matches with The Penguin's henchmen.

 

6. He was busted on The Gotham Turnpike, where he was weaving and sharing a 12 pack with The Riddler.

 

5. Citizens of Gotham got tired of his "Tonight will be the greatest night in the history of crime fighting" hype week after week.

 

4. Rumors began to circulate after he wouldn't join Catwoman's "Kiss My Ass" club.

 

3. Everyone knows Alfred is the real shooter of the stable.

 

2. People grew tired of him posting drunk and starting flame wars on www.crimefightingclassics.com .

 

And the number one reason why Batman isn't cool anymore...

 

He stopped selling in the cliffhangers after he started dating the commissioner's daughter.

 

----

 

Hehehe.. I felt like sharing that with you all.

somewhat funny, but out of date... hey, that's kinda like how most (general populace) jokes are about wrestling! What are the odds?

[Guest Sassquatch]

somewhat funny, but out of date... hey, that's kinda like how most (general populace) jokes are about wrestling! What are the odds?

 

Comics try to improve upon their faults while the WWE still can't get away from the same demons that plagued them years ago since they are run by the same guy who nearly saw the company run into the ground.

 

At least with comics you can dispose of the top guy if they don't work out and move onto to someone else for a change of pace and direction.

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

Bullshit. Comic Books can be just as political as Wrestling. (Just ask Steve Ditko.)

 

If they wern't, Zimmerman would be out of a job.

[Guest Sassquatch]

The level of politics are there but the mistakes made in the past are always remembered by those in the comic book industry who become the top guy in order to not be out of a job in a month.

 

Vince will continue to run the WWF until he croaks.

 

If the WWE were a comic book company and Vince was the EIC, you could bet on him being tossed out of the spot with the poor press and ratings he his company has recieved over the last 2 years or so.

 

You can bring in new blood in the hopes of them taking on the head job roles within the company and being successful. With Vince and the WWE that is not possible unless Linda and the other share-holders forced Vince to give up his majority stock which will be a cold day in Hell if that ever happens.

 

I also don't recall brining up anything about politics in regards to the buddy of someone in power getting a push to the top when it is clear that the readers/fans don't like the guy who is being shoved down their throats.

 

That kind of thing will always be a constant in any type of medium where friends are employed and one happens to be a guy in power. The mistakes made in wrestling have not been adverted because no one cares to look back at the past and actually stop and plan out ways of avoiding those same mistakes which nearly bankrupt the WWE 7 years ago. While the comic book industry has it's fair share of flaws as well, they have a better record as it pertains to not making the same fatal mistakes that their predecessors made years earlier which nearly plunged the industry into a black hole of creative Hell.

[Guest TheZsaszHorsemen]

The level of politics are there but the mistakes made in the past are always remembered by those in the comic book industry who become the top guy in order to not be out of a job in a month.

 

Vince will continue to run the WWF until he croaks.

 

If the WWE were a comic book company and Vince was the EIC, you could bet on him being tossed out of the spot with the poor press and ratings he his company has recieved over the last 2 years or so.

 

You can bring in new blood in the hopes of them taking on the head job roles within the company and being successful. With Vince and the WWE that is not possible unless Linda and the other share-holders forced Vince to give up his majority stock which will be a cold day in Hell if that ever happens.

 

I also don't recall brining up anything about politics in regards to the buddy of someone in power getting a push to the top when it is clear that the readers/fans don't like the guy who is being shoved down their throats.

 

That kind of thing will always be a constant in any type of medium where friends are employed and one happens to be a guy in power. The mistakes made in wrestling have not been adverted because no one cares to look back at the past and actually stop and plan out ways of avoiding those same mistakes which nearly bankrupt the WWE 7 years ago. While the comic book industry has it's fair share of flaws as well, they have a better record as it pertains to not making the same fatal mistakes that their predecessors made years earlier which nearly plunged the industry into a black hole of creative Hell.

You mentioned that the WWE was being run by the same guy who nearly destroyed it.

 

 

The same guy was running it when they came back from the brink. The same guy was running it when they reached their greatest heights of popularity.

 

 

Sometimes radical changes in leadership everytime the business drops a little can be more detrimental then one guy who seems crazy at the time.

[Guest Sassquatch]

Vince doesn't have any more chances to screw up. The fan base is down to the casual fans after having run off the long-time fans which accounted for half of that 6.0 rating he used to get back in '98 by just putting Austin out in the ring.

 

If the WWE goes down any farther and keeps blindly turning it's eye to the past and current mistakes that have plagued it, then they are as good as dead.

 

Marvel and DC have reached some deep creative and financial lows in the past but neither ever walked on such a thin tight rope as the WWE is currently walking on.

 

Vince's success has been largely overrated and due to the real people responsible for the WWE's succes being overlooked who helped Vince reach the WWE's moments of greatness and helped him through the company's hard times.

[Guest Some Guy]

I think politics do work there way into comics, anywhere there are big egos politics will get in the way. Spawn doesn't sell as well as it used to but Todd isn't gone. Dan Jurgens gets to "push" his characters in the DCU (or used to a few years ago. Etc...

[Guest Sassquatch]

Politics are everywhere.

 

But the comic book industry has never come as close to the WWE of completely dissolving and becoming nothing but a distant memory. Politics in comic books stretches back all the way to the Timely Comics days which was cut throat in every sense.