Guest Thoth Report post Posted February 18, 2003 I was never around when we had the really bad people, but I think it would be fun if we had a little history lesson. As I have little to no idea for most of these, maybe the grizzled vets can explain what the hell these guys were thinking: Stone Froze Jack Houston BasketballASA The Worm Brahma Bull Ted Flink (Arguable, I marked for the Five Flaming Fruits) Cutthroat (Not that old, but many have mercifully never heard of him) HamSauce And others you can think of. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest 5_moves_of_doom Report post Posted February 18, 2003 Stone Froze Jack Houston BasketballASA The Worm Brahma Bull Ted Flink (Arguable, I marked for the Five Flaming Fruits) Cutthroat (Not that old, but many have mercifully never heard of him) HamSauce It is now my goal to, by the end of the week, dig up either the stats, or a match of ALL of these guys. Soul Assassin (Sexton Hardcastle) vs Ted Flink (Pink Slip On A Pole Match) was a CLASSIC, yo. I'll also look up teh G0R0/Petro the Clown Scaffhold match... THAT was a classic. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Powerplay Report post Posted February 18, 2003 ... You forgot G0R0! For those of you who don't know him, here are his stats. Board Name: G0R0 Wrestling name: G0R0 Height: 20'2'' Weight: 740lbs Hometown: JAPAN Age: 94 Stable: GORO TOO BIG Heel/Face?: FACE Quote - "GORO BEINGS TALL!" Looks - GORO BEINGS VERY HANDSOMES. MOTHRA HAVE NOTHINGS ON GORO. Ring Entrance - "Sail Away" by Enya comes on to the speakers, as GORO walks out. No Pyro. No fancy entrance. GORO BEINGS CHARISMATIC ENOUGH ON HIS OWN. Stats - Strength 12 Speed 1 Vitality 1 Charisma 6 Style - GORO BEINGS SERIOUS TECHNICAL WRESTLER! Signature Moves - 1. GORO SMASH - GORO PICKS UP SOMEONE AND SMASHES HIM 2. ARMDRAG 3. GORO PUNCH - GORO PUNCHES 4. German Suplex 5. GORO STOMP - GORO STOMPS SOMEONE 6. GORO TORO GORO - SPEAR! 7. GORO? GORO! - PUMP HANDLE SLAM 8. G.O.R.O. - DDT 9. O.R.O.G. - REVERSE DDT 10. ROGO - FISHERMAN'S SUPLEX Uncommon Moves - 1. HURRICANRADA 2. 450 SPLASH 3. GORO IS DEAD - GORO PLAYS DEAD, BUT ISN'T 4. BIG BOOT, ALTHOUGH GORO DON'T WEAR SHOES 5. G.O.R.O. ROGO O.R.O.G. COMBO 6. REAR CHOKE 7. MAGISTRAL GORO CRADLE 8. ROCK BOTTOM 9. GORO PILE DRIVER 10. ANYTHING BENOIT DOES Finishers 1. GOROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO - Stunner. Bio - Origins of GORO are hard to come by. It seems as though he was born the son of a poor spanish merchant in 1432. After living for many years in obscurity, GORO was to co-star in a 1925 film called, "GORO VS. GODZILLA." It seems as though GORO never got over the fact that GODZILLA make it popular, and GORO did not. Many year later in 1943 he ate half of TOYKO and ruled it with an iron fist. Ruling a large nation made GORO lonly, and he soon left his island home. In 1979 GORO joined the rock group KISS, although was kicked out of the band when they learned he couldn't really play guitar. He was quoted as saying, "GORO BEINGS TOO BIG." We fast forward to now, where GORO is trying to suceed in the IGNJL. With a bit of strength, and a little luck. GORO might withstand his ego problem with GODZILLA. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Edwin MacPhisto Report post Posted February 18, 2003 TNT, can you dig up and post the "Caveman" Chris Raynor stats? I think they're on a promo written by King from, like, a year and a half ago, in the summer of 2001. If you have trouble finding it, just search for "SMASH." Or maybe "red boobs." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Angel_Grace_Blue Report post Posted February 18, 2003 Ah, gather around children, and I shall tell tales of such jack asses like Stone Froze, and BasketballASA...and stuff. Okay, Stone Froze was a leaguer, who, I presume, REALLY like Steve Austin, so much so that he basically copied nearly everything from that gimmick. I'm not sure if he wrote a match, but he was idolized in a promo written by Cyclone Comet, called "Death by Dummy" (The whole straw dummy thing has deeper, stranger roots). Oh, and if I'm not mistaken, Brahma Bull was a Rock clone, and I think the guy who did SFJH was the same person who made Brahma Bull (And probably other guys) The Worm, I'm not sure, but he was an Aussie, and a friend of Crusen (I think, hell, most Aussies probably know each other). ASA, was, well, a loser. For one thing, his character was like 5'3" and around 260lbs. That's going into fat midget territory, there. But, the thing that far exceeds anything else is that ASA's character had a bone in his hair. This was for his finisher, "Bone to Bone", a diving headbutt, however, the bone in his hair made it more painful. He lost one of the two Battle for Survival matches we had, and was demoted. That's about it for him... HamSauce, uh...I think he might have been a friend of Renegade's (Not sure if this is real life or not). He was banned, and stuff...yeah.... Ted Flink, was, if Stubby told the truth, Stubby's younger brother. His friend was I think Kernal McJabbid, and maybe Sexton (Hell, for all we know, Sexton was Stubby and Ted's mom...). Uh...he was...fuck this, it's too painful for me to relive these memories... I don't know anything about Cutthroat, so I'm skipping him, and posting the Elk's stats: Wrestler's Name: The Elk a.k.a. Elkberg Height: 5 ft (At the shoulder, not counting antlers, all four hooves on the ground) Weight: 852 pounds Hometown: The great Plains of the United States Face/Heel: Neither Stable: None Ring Escort: None Ring Entrance: Exactly like Goldbergs except on the IGNTron it shows a video of the Elk. Favorite Weapon: Antlers Fighting Style: Unbeatable Favorite Match Stipulation: It doesn't matter cause the Elk will win. Character: He is an Elk. Ten Favorite Moves: 1)Scoop Slam 2)Horn line (Like a clothesline but with Antlers instead of a fore arm) 3)Superhammer 4)Body Press Drop 5)Stampede (Where the Elk trample his opponent) 6)Evenflow DDT 7)Shooting Star Press 8)Superhamer 9)Spear 10)Jackhammer Finishing Move: Impaler (Where the Elk impales his opponent on his antlers. this move isn't used very match as the Elk prefers to pin his opponents not kill them.) Strength:100 Speed:100 Vitality:100 Endurance:100 (Back in the days, it was vitality and endurance, just uh, imagine that endurance says charisma. I mean, aren't vitality and endurance pretty much the same thing?) Note that the Elk is a one of a kind most Elks can fall into three categories which are separated by the number of tines (pointy things) they have on each of their antlers. Six tines is a Royal. Seven is an Imperial. Very rare elks with eight are Monarchs. The Elk on the other hand has fifteen tines making a new category the Emperor. Hail the might Elk. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest CED Ordonez Report post Posted February 18, 2003 Cutthroat debuted on the final IGNWF show as Dragon. He jobbed to me along with Wicked Style, who never showed. Cutthroat became Cutthroat in the rechristened SWF and jobbed aplenty, including the time he jobbed to me yet again. Yes, I hold two victories against him. You should be proud. I think he managed to win a whopping three times, all by default, in his stay here before vanishing off the face of the planet. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest chirs3 Report post Posted February 19, 2003 G0R0 ain't got shit on me! New Stats: Chris "Caveman" Raynor. Wrestling Style: SMAAAAAASH! Entrance: 'Electra Made Me Blind' begins to play, but as soon as Art screams, "ART SMASH!" it changes into the Flintstones theme! Chris Raynor runs out from under the ramp in a leopard-skin caveman sarong, a ribbon of drool hanging from his mouth! Blue pyro erupts and Raynor moans like a stupid infant as the bright lights scare him. He stumbles into the ring and continues to drool, waving his trademark Big Wooden Club over his head. Weapon of Choice: Christopher Walken--er, Big Wooden Club. Signature Moves: SMASH MK1 - CAVEMAN PUNCH! SMASH MK2 - CAVEMAN HEADBUTT! SMASK MK3 - CAVEMAN TWISTING SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT...OF SMASH! SMASH MK4 - CAVEMAN HIT-WITH-CLUB~! Uncommon: SMASH! Rare: CLUB SANDWICH - CHRIS PUT CLUB IN MOUTH, CHRIS JUMP, CHRIS GIVE HURT AND SMAAAAASHHHH! CLUB'S EDGE - BIG FINISH MOVE EVER! CHRIS PUT CLUB IN HAIR AND DO DIVE HEAD-BUTT! IT HURT MORE CAUSE OF CLUB IN SMASH HAIR! FINISH! SMASH RAYN: CHRIS JUMP ON MAN TILL MAN DIE! HE SHOUT "SMAAAAAASH" AND CROWD SMILE! Bio: CHRIS SMASH COME FROM UNGA TRIBE, UNGA TRIBE KICK OUT CAUSE CHRIS SMASH TOOOOO MUUUUUCH SMASHING! CHRIS ONCE EAT TREE BUT TREE TASTE BAD SO CHRIS SMASH AND SELL TO SMALL MAN AND BY SELL CHRIS MEAN CRUSH AND SMAAAASH! CHRIS COME TO I-G-N-W-F TO CAVE-SMASH AND SHOW THE CLUB OF SMASH! EVERCLEAR SMASH ALL!” -Edwin Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest DiabloIIFreak1010 Report post Posted February 19, 2003 Cutthroat debuted on the final IGNWF show as Dragon. He jobbed to me along with Wicked Style, who never showed. Cutthroat became Cutthroat in the rechristened SWF and jobbed aplenty, including the time he jobbed to me yet again. Yes, I hold two victories against him. You should be proud. I think he managed to win a whopping three times, all by default, in his stay here before vanishing off the face of the planet. Don't forget the Matt Myers/Insane Lucahdore tag team, and our first tag match was IL/Matt Myers against Cutthroat. ...To which we murdered him. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ash Ketchum Report post Posted February 19, 2003 I once marked a Cutthroat match. Cutthroat vs. Kaimkaze. Cutthroat wrote half a match and sent it in. Kamikaze won easily. And BTW, my #1 use of Cutthroat has been making him into a Pokemon (he can only say his name), and having all sorts of bad shit happen to him. It's quite fun. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Grand Slam Report post Posted February 19, 2003 So Ced, you had a match with Cutthroat? I laugh at Cutthroat! Check out my first match!! Double Ring Match RING ONE Perfect Bo vs. Mark Stevens vs. Falcon vs. Moses Buckley & RING TWO Professor Frink vs. The Shadow vs. Assassin vs. BasketballASA Yes, not only did I have a match with BasketballASA, but it included Professor Frink!! Oh yeah, and it had Bo in it too. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Insanityman Report post Posted February 19, 2003 No mention for Crush? Or Lucky? ...Not even one for mention? Or Giggilo Joe? Pokemaster? And I've faced two of those four guys... Caveman > G0R0. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Tyler McClelland Report post Posted February 19, 2003 Tyler McClelland. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Longdogger_Pete Report post Posted February 19, 2003 The Flaming Tard. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
