Losing match thread

[Guest SupaTaft]

Why did I lose?

 

-Taft

___________________________________________________________

 

Axis: Tonight we have a card just BURSTING with excellent wrestling and...

 

King: AND this match is NOT one of them! Let’s check the line-up shall we? We’ve got Aecas, a big dumb Brit. Thor, a big stupid god. And Viagra, who’s a big...

 

Axis: Sorry King, but his name is Va’aiga. Say it like this, Vuh-eyn-guh...

 

King: Quit cutting me off Axis, I can pronounce Viagra’s name just fine by myself. My point is that this is a big hoss-fest. Not only that, but its a THREE-WAY hoss-fest! I hope I can keep my lunch down by the time these three have finished “wrestling”.

 

Axis: It won’t be as bad as all that King, from what we’ve seen from these three, they’re stellar competitors! We’ve seen Aecas before and he’s always been able to provide us with exciting, fast-paced matches. Thor was once a World Title contender and is making a great comeback. And Va’aiga... from what he had to say last week, I’d pay to see him just for all the hype surrounding him! But right now we take you down to Funyon-town!

 

Funyon begins to speak into the mic but is cut-off by a sudden absence of light in the Mexico City arena. The opening to “Superbeast” by Rob Zombie kicks in and the crowd cheers quietly, digging the dark music more than the wrestler himself. The crowd is suddenly alarmed by the flashing red lights that kick in and splash the arena in lightly rhythmically. The SmarkTron fires up images of bloody letters spelling out the name of the man called Aecas. Highlights of his sadism fascinate the crowd and correspond well with the music.

 

Suddenly, as though the spotlight technicians are also focused on the music and video, a red spotlight shines on the wrestler Aecas who is about halfway down the ramp by now. His face showcases many emotions as it is better lit by the red strobes. Hate. Pain. Excite. Sadism. And ultimately indifference as he reaches the ring and enters quietly, focused on the massive task at hand.

 

Axis: Aecas is beginning to become a major force in the JL. This kid has what it takes to become a key player in the game...

 

King: Major farce you mean! The guy looks scary and has an intimidating entrance but has been unable to back it up in the ring. I mean look at him... he’s a hoss!

 

The lights flick back on as Funyon again raises the mic to speak but immediately, darkness falls and a crazy guitar line rocks the house as smoke pours out of the ramp. The crowd explodes and cheers wildly, but backs down immediately, waiting respectively for the entrance to finish. Chanting of the word “Thunder” begins to play as some of the fans in attendance chant along with the music. The music intensifies and suddenly Brian Johnson’s voice rings out:

 

 

“YOU’VE BEEN...

 

 

THUNDERSTRUCK!!”

 

 

A large bolt of lightning strikes the stage with like the clap of doom as a blue spotlight shines into the smoke. The spotlight suddenly catches the shape of Thor cutting through the smoke like a knife through butter. He steps through the smoke and smiles broadly, thoroughly enjoying the roar of the crowd, which strikes him as he clears through the smoke. On his way down the ramp, he slaps the hands of some lucky fans with the hand not gripping Mjolnir. The God of Thunder then reaches the ring, sets his hammer down, and steps up to the apron and then over the top rope with two big steps.

 

Thor stands in one corner, lightly stretching and adjusting himself before seeing Aecas in the opposing corner staring him down. The piercing white eyes of Aecas unsettle Thor, unsettling him enough for Thor to approach his opponent. Aecas follows suit and the two approaches each other in the middle of the ring. Aecas is VERY tall, in truth only five inches shorter than the Thunder God. Thor looks the young man up and down, with a suspicious look on his face, having only rarely spied another so big. The two then stare at each other in the ring until the tension is shattered.

 

 

“You know what time it be.”

 

 

The crowd pops in anticipation of the next wrestler and they aren’t disappointed as the new guy sprints down to the ring and slides into the ring, surprising the other two wrestlers, who are now standing on their guard waiting to teach the newest member of the federation some respect. Va’aiga immediately charges Thor and takes down the big man with a monster lariat. The crowd roars as he turns and grabs a startled Aecas and whips him to the ropes. Aecas bounces back off the ropes and with as much force as Va’aiga’s body can manage, Aecas is lifted off his feet and slammed to the mat with a jumping Maori Drop. The crowd is ecstatic as Va’aiga springs up and flashes the Maori hand sign as the music goes:

 

 

“STRIKE IT...

 

 

*KABOOM*

 

 

When the iron is hot!”

 

Axis: OH MY!! This is the much anticipated man called Va’aiga who hails from New Zealand! If this is what he does for his FIRST match, I can’t WAIT to see what this young man has to bring to the table in the future!

 

King: He took down Thor with a CLOTHESLINE!! The big bastard has taken a dozen chair shots and shaken them off like nothing! What the hell is wrong with this guy?

 

Axis: Apparently they grow ’em pretty big where he comes from King!

 

The fans are certainly buying what Va’aiga is selling as while his opponents are down in the ring, he looks at the crowd and yells in a very loud and brash voice “MY HOUSE!!” which causes the many fans in the arena to cheer uncontrollably. Suddenly, his focus is drawn from the crowd to Thor who has ascended and does not look happy with the youngster. The two come chest to chest, barking hostilities at each other. Va’aiga is ALSO very tall, though still not as tall as the God of Thunder.

 

Thor leaves nothing to chance as he shoves Va’aiga back, only prompting the Maori Badass to pounce back with a shove of his own. Thor refuses to take the insult lightly as he again charges back but this time with a big left hand. After getting struck with the powerful fist, Va’aiga steps back, holds his jaw, and then smiles and nods at Thor, who scowls with dissatisfaction. Again Thor charges forward and hurls a punch at his opponent but this punch has a more powerful effect than the last. Va’aiga takes two steps back and then trips over Aecas, who is still recovering from the Maori drop. Va’aiga fall on his ass and looks over at Thor who flexes his arms and glares at the New Zealander.

 

Axis: What an exchange by those two! I honestly don’t think Thor has ever fought two men as big as Va’aiga and Aecas.

 

King: You’re right there Axis. Thor has never fought another man within seven inches of his own height. Looks like the God of Blunder will have his hands full tonight!

 

Axis: That makes you happy doesn’t it?

 

King: You know it does!

 

The Maori Badass is quick to get up though, as is Aecas. Both men stand and look at each other questioningly. Seeming to have read each others’ expressions, Aecas and Va’aiga both charge the Thunder God, knocking him off his feet. Not giving the other big men a chance to take advantage, Thor climbs back to his feet immediately, almost daring his opponents to get come more. Thor’s opposition gladly accepts the offer and punch Thor in the face sporadically, trying to daze the Thunder God as much as they can.

 

After several vicious rights and lefts from Aecas and Va’aiga, Thor is finally stunned. They immediately bend over and put Thor’s arm over the back of their necks and grab onto Thor’s belt. With every ounce of effort they have the two wrestlers lift the giant up in the air and then fall backwards, suplexing him to the mat with a thunderous boom. The crowd pops like mad as Thor’s faces twists and wrenches in pain. Both Aecas and Va’aiga go for the pin at the same time but collide heads as they go, prompting them both to lean up and look at the other.

 

Axis: Looks like we may have some dissention between this little impromptu team of Aecas and the impressive Va’aiga. After that MASSIVE double suplex, they both went for the pin.

 

King: That’s right, they had their suplex planned out but I guess they didn’t agree on who was to make the pin fall. Dolts.

 

Va’aiga and Aecas debate back and forth as they stand over the body of Thor. They get more and more loud and more and more angry as they yell. Eventually their argument boils to a head and Aecas finally leaps over Thor’s fallen body and onto Va’aiga, tackling him with a vertical press. Aecas begins to hammer away at Va’aiga with furious punches but soon, Va’aiga rolls over and reverses Aecas’ position. Now Va’aiga pummels Aecas with punches that devastate the psychotic Brit. The crowd is firmly behind both men as they continue to brawl. Aecas kicks his legs up suddenly, causing Va’aiga to lose his balance and allows Aecas to roll out and get to his feet.

 

Disappointed and disoriented, Va’aiga stands as well but has no time to grieve as Aecas kicks Va’aiga in the gut and bends him over with authority. Aecas gets a wild gleam in his eye and grabs Va’aiga around the waist. It is quite obvious that Va’aiga does not want to go along with whatever Aecas has in mind, as he struggles and strains to get enough of his energy up to lift Aecas, but Aecas is not to be denied. With a massive lift, Va’aiga is suddenly sitting on Aecas’ shoulders. Realizing where he is and where he may soon be going, the big man panics and punches Aecas in the head, loosening his black ponytail from its tie.

 

Axis: Oh boy! If Aecas isn’t shaken by Va’aiga’s punches, the Maori will be set for one WILD ride!

 

King: It’s not THAT wild Axis, it’s just a powerbomb.

 

Axis points to the camera in front of him and to the tiny red light with a sign below it that says “KAYFABE”.

 

King: Oh... right.

 

Making his extremely high threshold for pain useful, Aecas is able to ignore Va’aiga’s punches and execute his move. Aecas takes three huge steps forward, gaining more velocity with each step, still hoisting a frantic Va’aiga on his shoulders. After the third step, Aecas brings the struggling Maori down to the mat with a running powerbomb with a roar. The crowd cheers for the incredibly devastating maneuver and they cheer even louder as Aecas goes for the cover on Va’aiga. Aecas is denied the cover, however, as Thor who is just barely moving after that HUGE double suplex, gets to his knees and breaks up the count with a big axe handle smash.

 

Perturbed that he failed to get the three count, Aecas gets back up to his feet and pulls Thor up as well by his thick red mane. Thor is bent over, still trying to regain his composure as Aecas proceeds to lay in stiff rights to the back of his head. Aecas finally feels the fight is sufficiently taken out of his opponent and brings him upright and grabs him by the arm, putting all his momentum behind the load to whip Thor into the turnbuckle. Thor is barely standing in the corner, propping himself up by leaning on the turnbuckles as Aecas charges forward and nails Thor in the breadbasket with his knee.

 

Axis: Will you LOOK at the power of Aecas! That is one HELL of a task, to move Thor when he doesn’t want to go. Thor weighs three hundred and forty five pounds, and that's not three hundred and forty five pounds of dead weight either. That’s three hundred and forty five pounds of angry giant, but Aecas just whipped him like it was nothing!

 

King: Yeah... I hate to say this but I’ve got to hand it to Aecas. That is no easy feat. You’ve got to keep in mind that NONE of these men are under six foot seven! They are ALL big and ALL hard to throw around.

 

Thor doubles over in pain but Aecas hasn’t had his fun yet. He repositions the Thunder God so that he’s leaning against the ropes and then grabs his arm and shoulder and whips him again into the ropes. Aecas dashes forward and raises his foot, trying to catch Thor with the big boot, but Thor sees the move and snaps out of his daze, charging under it. Aecas is shocked and turns around, only to see Thor barreling towards him, an unnerving sight to say the least.

 

With incredible agility, Aecas actually LEAPFROGS over Thor’s back and runs to the ropes himself, trying anything to stay on top. Thor also continues his momentum gaining rush, he bounces off the ropes and holds out his massive tree trunk of an arm. Thor’s arm then collides violently with Aecas chest and he goes down like a tree in the woods. The crowd explodes in cheers for the relatively fast paced series of moves, Thor raises his arm to quickly acknowledge the crowd’s cheers before going for the pin, but is only allowed to do so for a moment as the Maori Badass, who has just recovered from Aecas’ running powerbomb, attacks Thor and takes him down with a running shoulder tackle, followed immediately by a stream of furious punches.

 

Axis: Well, I suppose they call him violence personified for a reason. Va’aiga is ALL business!

 

King: Yeah, yeah, but did you see Aecas LEAPFROG over Thor’s back? No one his size should be allowed to do that... ever. There ought to be a law.

 

Axis: Oh yeah, that Aecas has INCREDIBLE agility for a big man. If he can move like that and be as powerful as he is, I know I don't want to get in the ring with him!

 

Va’aiga is relentless in his assault on Thor, peppering his head with lefts and rights with no sign of stopping. He probably has no intention of stopping but Thor disagrees and powers out from beneath the Maori. Thor struggles to get up, using the ropes for leverage, and finally stands not looking too pleased. Va’aiga rolls to his feet and back off, looking at the Thunder God inquisitively, as if to say “How’d ya like that?”. Thor does NOT like it though, as he instinctively feels his forehead to check for damage and damage there is indeed. Thor then looks at his hand, slightly bloodied, and then looks at Va’aiga with an angry smirk and nods.

 

Thor is the first to make a move however and he raises his arms up in the air slowly, outstretching his fingers. Va’aiga looks questioningly at Thor and then approaches the seven footer. Responding in the same fashion, Va’aiga raises his hands to meet Thor’s and wraps his fingers in between Thor’s, accepting the throw down to the Test of Strength. Immediately, both parties begin to squeeze away, a bit of a worried look on Thor’s face, having never faced anyone quite as strong. For a moment, Va’aiga is actually winning the test as he arches his back and forces Thor slightly down.

 

The Thunder God is angered by this though as he will not be defeated in his own Test of Strength. Thor becomes suddenly vocal and grunts louder than before, now exerting much more energy in trying to overpower his adversary. The task is an arduous one but not beyond Thor’s capabilities, which he soon proves by squeezing his fingers tighter around the Maori’s hands, and regaining the leverage he needs to get fully vertical again and force Va’aiga down. Finally, with the crowd cheering like mad, Thor forces Va’aiga down to his knees, proving himself stronger than the New Zealand native.

 

Axis: Good LORD!! I’ve NEVER seen anyone even come close to Thor in the Test of Strength! Va’aiga actually had Thor hunched over for a moment, but Thor got back on top in the end.

 

King: Thor is getting manhandled in this match, and I’m loving every minute of it!

 

Thor releases his Asgardian grip on Va’aiga and offers him his hand to help him up, showing his good sportsmanship. The Maori accepts and gets back to his feet with Thor’s assistance, both oblivious to the danger that is approaching. While Thor and Va’aiga were competing in the test of strength, Aecas had rolled out of the ring to safety. After getting his wits, he walked to the opposite corner from where he was lying and ascended the turnbuckle as Thor was taking control of the Test of Strength. Now that Thor and Va’aiga are not busy, Aecas leaps off the top with a crossbody, getting major air and taking down both of his shocked opponents to the mat!

 

Aecas lays for a moment but stands shakily after a moment, trying to decide which opponent to cover for the pin. He eventually decides on Va’aiga, thinking him already tired from the Test of Strength. Aecas drops to the mat and hooks Va’aiga’s leg, the ref also follows suit and drops to the mat to count.

 

 

1

.

.

2

.

.

 

 

Va’aiga kicks out! After taking a crossbody block and being physically drained from the Test of Strength, Va’aiga finds it deep down in himself to kick out of Aecas’ pinning attempt. Aecas eyes burn with white hot anger as he slaps the mat and questions the referee’s eyesight.

 

Axis: Holy HamSauce! Va’aiga just kicked out! He should be down for a while after what he’s been through. The big Maori actually kicked out, this guy is incredible!

 

King: Did you just yell “Holy HamSauce!”? For shame Axis... for shame.

 

Aecas’ psychotic side begins to shine through as he clenches his fists and grits and bares his teeth. He stands, staying to one corner, his body shaking with rage as Va’aiga is the first to get up, followed slowly by Thor. Aecas has had enough of failure and charges at Va’aiga bringing his leg up in the air, looking for a Yakuza Kick, but Va’aiga sees the foot coming, bends over, and backdrops Aecas out of the ring to the floor. The crowd pops for the carnage that is to ensue in the ring. Va’aiga throws a punch at Thor’s skull which connects, causing Thor to step back.

 

Va’aiga goes to throw another punch but this time Thor blocks it and counters with one of his own. The Maori steps back and then forward again, swinging for another punch but this time his fist is grabbed by Thor who quickly grabs Va’aiga by his small tuft of hair in the front and headbutts the New Zealander. Va’aiga stumbles back, leaning against the ropes, and holds his head, trying to shake out the cobwebs. Soon the Maori gets his wits about him and grabs Thor as he approaches. Va’aiga whips Thor into the ropes and attempts to hit a big lariat, but the wise Thor ducks under and continues to bounce.

 

Thor recoils off the ropes and sees Va’aiga just barely turn around. Thor then uses all of his momentum and all of his strength to spin around counterclockwise and nail Va’aiga with his elbow. A roaring elbow it is indeed as Thor makes a very audible grunt as his elbow collides with Va’aiga’s face. The crowd absolutely EXPLODES as The Maori Badass hits the mat like he’d been hit by a wrecking ball. Thor staggers for a moment, trying to get himself out of the dizziness that the move caused him. Finally, the Thunder God flops to the mat and pulls himself over to Va’aiga to make the pin. Unbeknownst to him, Aecas has mostly recovered and is now climbing back into the ring.

 

 

1

 

Aecas crawls closer.

 

 

2

 

 

Aecas is within an arms length of Thor’s leg to break the pin.

 

 

3

 

 

The referee’s hand strikes the mat a third time just as Aecas grabs Thor’s foot and tries to pull him off of Va’aiga but the bell is rung.

 

DING!! DING!! DING!!

 

Thor stands slowly, still shaking off the effects that his own move incurred upon him. Funyon announces from ringside, finally not being cut off. “Here is your winner... THOOOOOOOR!!” Thor’s music starts up as he walks around the ring with his arm raised in victory whilst yelling “HOOOOOOO!!”. Aecas scowls in anger but rolls out of the ring respectfully. Va’aiga continues to lay on the mat breathing heavily, unaware as to what has happened.

 

Axis: What a bout that was! We had three of the biggest men in our league facing off against each other in what was one HELL of a match up! I’m glad I got to call this match tonight, this was truly one for the record books! Stay tuned for more great SJL action coming up next!

 

Suicide King grumbles.

[Rawknight 0]

If in response to your question the answer is anything other than "it was damn close, you were VERY unlucky" then I'd be very, very shocked. Great match dude, looking forward to facing you 1 on 1

[Guest The Last Free Voice]

i honestly thought my maych was the better match.

 

 

AXIS: And we're back here at SJL WRATH! Up next we have Tryst taking on Geddion! It is the first match in the TV title tournament! As always I'm here with the Suicide King!

 

KING: Yes, we are here live in Arena Mexico. While I'm at it I'd like to plug Benne's Trucking service. He'll get ya over the border or your money back!

 

AXIS: Will you stop. Lets just throw to Funyon before you say anything else to get us sued.

 

FUNYON: The following contest is scheduled for one fall and is part of the Television Title Tournament.

 

As the lights blacken out, the crowd drops to a dead silence and their eyes are drawn to the entry way, where a deep green spotlight shines down from above. The Smarktron comes to life, the video running through a lush green forest at great speeds, finally stopping about 20 feet in front of a man, wielding a bow and arrow. He pulls the arrow back, releases, and as it reaches the screen, pyrotechnics on the opposite wall explode as “Forest” by System of a Down blasts across the loud speakers, and the sleeping crowd comes back to life as Tristan Whitt, also known as Tryst, comes rushing out of the back to stand within the spotlight, Bow in one hand, arrow in the other.

 

FUNYON: Ladies and Gentlemen...the following competitor stands at six feet, one inch tall, weighing in at two hundred and eighteen pounds...he hails from Bairnsdale, Britain...Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome Tryyyyyyyyssssst!!!

 

Making his way down the ramp, Tryst takes off his quiver of arrows and hands it to the timekeeper, along with his bow as he rolls into the ring and soaks in the cheers from the rhapsodic crowd. The lights fade back up to normal, and he awaits his opponent.

 

FUNYON: And from parts unknown, weighing two-hundred and thirty-five pounds, this is Geddion!

 

The lights dim, then fade totally out. POD'S Set It Off blares thru the sound system, red strobelights abound, and Geddion, a taller young man, makes his way to the ring. He enters the ring and mounts the ropes, flashing his trademark hand sign. He crosses his middle fingers over his index and holds the ring fingers down with his thumbs. He brings these over his head in a cross.

 

AXIS: The bell rings and we are under way!

 

The combatants circle and lock up in the center of the ring. Tryst gets a quick armdrag as the jam-packed crowd applauds. They lock up again and Geddion armdrags Tryst. Tryst rotates his arm and charges, ducking under a Geddion clothesline and getting another armdrag. Geddion quickly gets to his feet and gets hit with a Mexican armdrag that sends him reeling. Geddion is standing near the ropes as Tryst charges, Geddion tries an armdrag but Tryst lets his body hit the ropes as momentum carries him backwards into an armdrag of his own. Geddion stands up and charges at Tryst. He side steps and attempts to kick Geddions feet out from under him, but Geddion lands with both feet on the middle rope and back flips back, landing perfectly on his feet. They face off both in a ready stance.

 

AXIS: What a sequence!

 

Tryst gives Geddion a courteous nod, and they lock up again. Geddion controls with a hammerlock. Reversed into one for Tryst. Countered into a rear waist lock, and Geddion takes him down. Geddion floats into a front face lock witch is countered into an arm ringer by Tryst. Geddion reverses it back into a rear waist lock and attempts a German suplex, but Tryst lands on his feet.

 

KING: For some reason the crowd likes this loser!

 

AXIS: They appreciate athletic wrestling!

 

Tryst offers a handshake, and Geddion eyes him warily. He reluctantly shakes hands and lets go.

 

KING: What the Hell? Your're supposed to kick him!

 

Tryst turns around, apparently trying to get the crowd to clap for Geddions show of sportsmanship. Geddion smirks and delivers a lariat to the back of Tryst's head.

 

KING: There you go!

 

AXIS: Well Tryst should have known better than to turn his back.

 

Geddion begins to hammer away with forearms across the back of Tryst. Tryst gets to his feet and is sent off the ropes. Geddion swings with a clothesline, but Tryst ducks. Bouncing off the opposite ropes he delivers a flying forearm that sends Geddion into the ropes, witch he uses to steady himself. Tryst delivers a perfect drop-kick that sends Geddion tumbling to the outside. Tryst bounds off the opposite ropes and runs across the ring jumping in the air and twisting, crashing down onto Geddion.

 

AXIS: A picture perfect corkscrew palancha! The crowd is going ape.......... poopy.

 

KING: <snickers>

 

Tryst climbs up onto the apron. Looking back he is waiting for Geddion to stand up. When he does, Tryst jumps, putting both feet on the middle rope, and backfliping onto Geddion.

 

AXIS: A quebrada!

 

KING: A what?

 

AXIS: A que-bra-da, asai Moonsault.

 

KING: I knew that.

 

Tryst rolls Geddion back into the ring. Climbing in after him he kicks him a few times. As Geddion rises Tryst jumps up and hooks his legs around Geddions head and falls backwards into a huracanrana. He hooks the leg for

 

ONE

 

TWO

 

And Geddion rolls threw, breaking up the pin. Both men get to their feet and Geddion takes over with a poke to the eyes that sends the crowd into a fit of rage. He delivers a strong kick to Trysts ribs that hunches the crusader over in pain. Geddion grabs Trysts head and a handful of tights, he picks him up and drops him down on his head in an inverted DDT.

 

AXIS: And Geddion covers! ONE! TWO! And Tryst gets his shoulder up at two and a half! Geddion is upset at the pace of the count!

 

KING: As well he should be! The ref was obviously counting slow!

 

AXIS: Uh-huh. Okay. Back to the match now as Geddion appears to be looking for a vertical suplex.

 

But instead of dropping strait back he drops strait down in a beautiful Brainbuster. He floats over for a cover.

 

ONE!

 

TWO!

 

And Tryst gets a shoulder up! The crowd is going wild, trying to rally Tryst to victory. Geddion shoots him off, and looks for a tilt-a-whirl slam, but Tryst counters by holding on to Geddions arm and rolling thru with an armdrag.

 

AXIS: The crowd is going nuts! Both men are up now as Geddion looks for a Lariat, NO! Tryst hooks him in a crucifix! He's trying to roll him into a pin! No! It's another armdrag variation. He must be channeling Luchadors tonight!

 

Tryst kicks the rising Geddion in the gut and Plants him with a DDT. He begins to climb the ropes.

 

AXIS: It looks like he's going for the Arrow's Path!

 

He stands poised, ready to strike. He waits for Geddion to rise. But as he rises, he bumps the referee, sending him into the ropes and crotching Tryst.

 

AXIS: That no good!

 

KING: Accidents happen!

 

Geddion grabs Trysts head, and drops down into a DDT.

 

AXIS: A DDT off the top!

 

KING: Toe tag him boys!

 

But Geddion isn't covering. He is climbing to the top.

 

AXIS: What's he doing?

 

Geddion motions he's going for the kill. He stands on the top, looking down at his opponent. He jumps in the air, backfliping in a shooting star press. But while inverted he spins 360 degrees before crashing onto his opponent.

 

AXIS: The Final Blow! A corkscrew Shooting Star Press! Cover! ONE!! TWO!!! THREE!!!! That's it! It's over!

 

Geddion calmly looks at his fallen adversary, and walks back to his dressing room......

[Guest Ace309]

Geddion, truth be told, it wasn't a bad match. However, there were a few things that niggled at me while I was reading it.

 

- Your intros ran a little long. By my count, they were nearly a third of the match, and that feels disjointed. Along the same vein...

 

- The match itself was very short. the amount of WRESTLING wasn't bad - it was a little thin, but passable - but what you wrote could have very easily been stretched into a 3000-word match instead of staying with just short of 1300 words as you did. Your action was good, but you could describe it more thoroughly. The way you wrote, it was just move-move-move-corny commentary-move. Try describing the action of the moves a little more thoroughly. Frost in the SWF is particularly good at this; try reading some of his matches.

 

- Little grammatical things like writing "Trysts" instead of "Tryst's," and writing "threw" and "thru" when you mean "through." Those interfere with the flow of reading the match, and make it less pleasant to read.

 

- The action seemed a little thrown-together. There seemed to be some things that were in there just because you felt like they would be cool, which is okay. However, a match reads better (and is less cluttered) when every move means something. A lot of us plan our finishes and work backwards from there, including only moves that build logically to the finish. Why not give that a try?

 

- Your finish was good, if a little textbook. The problem is, as I noted above, there was nearly no description. I didn't particularly care for the ref bumpage, but I can see why it was there. However, a top-rope DDT is utterly devastating. In the WF, I use a top-rope brainbuster as a finisher, and a top-rope DDT is nearly the same move. You wrote it in a sum of around 60 words.

 

- After the match, you could have had the commentators recap the action, or at least had Funyon announce Geddion as the winner. It ended very abruptly, and that hurt the match.

 

For your four-corners match on Crimson, work on your descriptions a little. The word limit's there for a reason, so do your best to fill it. You have great potential. Good luck.

 

 

 

EDIT: Oh, and your commentators were a little bland. The easiest thing to do is try to write Axis sort of like Jim Ross, but with a better technical knowledge of wrestling, and write the Suicide King as a complete, total asshole. You seemed to want to have King appear foolish. He's a former SWF World Champion, and the current SWF Commissioner. He's knowledgable. He's an asshole because he has a RIGHT to be an asshole.

[Guest 5_moves_of_doom]

Yeah, see, EDWIN is foolish.

[Guest The Last Free Voice]

Okay, thanks for the feedback.

[David Blazenwing 0]

Okay, here's my match (David Blazenwing vs. Omega Storm) that I lost. I think the biggest problem I had with it was the commentary being too bland, but it's something I can work on (it was my first match, after all.) Give me some feedback on it!

 

 

Axis: Ladies and gentleman, our next match will be a good one. It’s another quarterfinal’s match in the Television Championship tournament. The rookie David Blazenwing will, in his debut match, face “Omega Storm” Leandro Grines, who King, if you remember, hasn’t fared so well as of late.

Suicide King: Axis, that is a huge understatement. This guy’s got a serious losing streak going on, and he’s hoping that his luck will change tonight.

Axis: If David Blazenwing can win this match and go on to win the tournament, not only will he go down in history for being the first holder of the SJL Television title since it’s retirement a few months ago, but he’ll have etched his place here in the SJL as a real contender.

King: That’s for sure. It’s also a great way to get noticed! What a way to debut in the organization than to win a formerly defunct championship! I hope he realizes how lucky he is to even be considered for this opportunity!

Axis: And what about “Omega Storm” Leandro Grines? Ladies and gentleman, he’s one of the most unstable people I’ve ever met… and I’ve met a lot of unstable people.

King: You’re right, Axis, but as unstable as he seems on the outside, that’s how cold and calculating he is on the inside. Once he lands the “Omega Cloudburst”, it’ll be all over for Blazenwing. Oh, good, the match is starting now.

 

Funyon: Ladies and gentleman, the following contest, scheduled for one fall, is an SJL Television Championship Tournament Quarterfinal match! On his way first to the ring, weighing in at 250 pounds, from Oak Creek, Wisconsin, the “Full Effect”… David Blazenwing!

 

The crowd ignites when “Headstrong” by Trapt hits the house speakers. David appears, poses on the stage, then continues down the ramp. He stops, throws his hands up in the air and drops them, igniting pyro from the stage. He continues into the ring, where he hits all four turnbuckles, getting a nice pop from the crowd every time. He takes off his black sunglasses and his green bandanna, tossing them to Funyon for safekeeping.

 

Funyon: And his opponent, weighing in at 245 pounds, from New Haven, Connecticut, “The Omega Storm”… Leandro Grines!

 

The arena lights die out for a few moments, then relight in a fast strobe, going from neon green to light blue to white (at random). The house speakers rumble with thunder for a moment, then a loud thunderclap is heard, accompanied with a bright flash of pyro from the stage. After the thunder, “One of a Kind” by Breaking Point plays and Grines appears. The boos from the crowd are almost like thunder on their own as Grines walks slowly down the ramp, flashing the rude crowd obscene gestures as he goes.

As he slides into the ring, Blazenwing performs a one-handstand ring out, not wanting to get attacked before the match begins. As soon as Grines stands up, the referee Matthew Kivell walks over to him and motions for the tazer clipped to Grines’ side. Grines tries to talk him out of it, but Kivell won’t let him use it, and Grines reluctantly gives up the weapon. David slides into the ring and is almost afraid of his opponent, seeing the unwaveringly serious look in his eyes. This guy means business. He looks at David and then…

 

King: Ha ha ha! Axis, did you see that?! He just flipped off Blazenwing!

Axis: I’m not sure how much Blazenwing liked that, but it looks like this match is underway!

 

Grines motions for Blazenwing to take the first shot. David grins and runs for the ropes, going for a big boot off the rebound. Grines, tricking David, easily scouts the move and… BANG! Grines smashes his leg into David’s head with a skull-cracking enzuigiri!

 

Axis: Ooh, a move we don’t see too often from Grines, and one his opponents fear, the enzuigiri!

King: We’re not even a minute into the match and David’s already made a big mistake… don’t trust anyone, and that goes double for Grines.

 

As David struggles to recover from the hard blow, Grines walks over and picks Blazenwing up, then proceeds to whip him into the ropes and upon David’s return, wrap him up in the La Majistral pin! The referee makes a 1 ½ count before Blazenwing easily kicks out. Both superstars get up at the same time and begin brawling before David weakens Grines enough to pick him up and drop him with a scoop slam (accompanied with cheers). While Grines lies on the canvas, David bounces off the ropes and nails him in the face with the shining wizard! He goes for a pin: 1…2… kickout!

 

King: Well, at least the kid’s smart enough to go for a pinfall…

Axis: King, you’re starting to sound a little one-sided. You wouldn’t be rooting for “Omega Storm”, would you?

King: Rooting for him? Hell, I bet twenty bucks that Grines would win the match!

Axis: Betting on SJL matches? Hmm… well, at any rate, it seems that Grines now has the advantage after nailing a hard heart punch on Blazenwing.

 

Axis is indeed correct… Grines does have the advantage and with David down, now sets in the shoulder breaker by grabbing David’s leg, turning around and placing Blazenwing’s leg over his shoulder before sitting down. As David screams in pain, Grines shows a sinister grin on his face.

 

King: (laughing) Look at him! He’s enjoying it!

Axis: Dammit, that’s another human being’s pain that he’s taking pleasure in! What a sick and twisted individual!

King: Sick and twisted, but horribly effective. I can smell my twenty dollars already…

 

The referee, Matthew Kivell, leans down next to David and asks him if he submits. David screams in agony, but refuses to tap out. Grines laughs as he pulls harder and harder on David’s leg, possibly trying to actually break it! David begins to crawl for the ropes, but loses his energy and collapses. With his shoulders firmly on the mat, Kivell starts a count. 1…. 2…. and David sits up quickly before collapsing again. Again, Kivell counts up to 2 before the exhausted superstar sits up again. He starts trying to escape the hold by moving his captured leg, but Grines hold on like a madman. Running out of ideas and time, David shifts his other leg and begins kicking Grines hard in the side, finally forcing him to lose his grip after almost a minute of kicking.

 

Axis: David managed to escape the hold, but Grines had it in for quite a while. I think it may have already taken its toll on David’s leg.

 

Indeed it had, for when Blazenwing got up, he had trouble shifting weight on the hurt leg, leaving him easy prey for Grines' reverse underhook DDT. He goes for a pin: 1…2… and a kickout! Grines pulls David up and whips him into the ropes, then runs to the opposite side of the ropes, bouncing off and nailing his opponent with a Lou Thesz press. He picks David up again and performs the same process again, but this time, David scouts the move and counters with the running spear, eliciting a huge pop from the crowd.

 

Axis: I don’t know how, but the kid actually found the power to counter! He may still have a chance!

King: Oh please, Axis... the rookie just got lucky. I still don’t think he has what it takes to defeat “Omega Storm”.

 

David uses this rare opportunity to gain an advantage over his foe by putting him into a leg-lock submission move of his own, the Edgecator! He grabs both of Grines' legs and puts his own leg in-between it, then flips his opponent over on his stomach. David gets on one knee and holds Grines' legs as if they were in a headlock. The lock is in! Kivell slides over to Grines and asks the magic question: will he submit? Grines screams “NO!” at the top of his lungs, but David has the lock in really tight. After shifting his weight to gain momentum, Grines manages to break out of the hold but, like David before, the negative effect on his legs is obvious. Both superstars struggle to their feet and are in obvious pain. They go back to punching again. Grines hits a left. David nails a right. Grines hits the heart punch again, sending David flying into the ropes, grabbing his chest in pain. With his back turned to Grines, the cracked superstar gets another sardonic grin on his face. He starts to walk towards David, then “trips” into the ref, knocking him over. With Kivell down, Grines slides behind David and hits the low blow, then rolls him up for the pin.

After a few seconds, Kivell starts to return to his feet. David still hasn’t escaped from the pin, and Grines makes sure that he won’t by grabbing and holding onto David’s khakis. The ref notices the pin and begins to make the count: 1….2….3!

 

Axis: What in the hell?! He got it?!

King: Ha, I knew it! I knew he was going to win!

 

Grines jumps up in disbelief. His losing streak is over! As he begins to celebrate in the ring (to a blanket of boos), David sits in shock… he lost the match! Unforgivable! He slides out of the ring while “One of a Kind” plays over the house speakers. While all this is going on, Ced Ordonez (another SJL referee) and Ben Hardy appear on the stage and make their way to ringside, on their way to confer with Kivell and Funyon. After a few seconds, they call the cameraman Gus over to watch a replay of the match’s finish. After viewing this, Kivell climbs back in the ring, while Funyon takes to the mic.

 

Funyon: Ladies and gentleman, due to the controversial nature of this match’s finish, it is the referee’s decision that this match WILL continue where left off! Both superstars please return to the ring at this time!

 

The crowd explodes when they hear this. David slides into the ring and, while Grines is busy arguing with Kivell over his decision, David sneaks up behind him and grabs his head, pulling it down ninety degrees relative to the rest of Grines body… the Dragon Sleeper has been administered! Grines wildly flails in an attempt to struggle free, but David lets him go. He looks down at Grines and picks him up by his head, then whips him into the ropes and, after bouncing off the opposite ropes, slams into him with a big boot! David goes for the pinfall, but only gets a two count before Grines kicks out. When David picks him up again to suplex him, Grines blocks the suplex with his foot and reverses into his own Jackhammer! He goes for the pin, but only gets a two count as well… but David didn’t kick out. In an act of cockiness, Grines refuses to pin David! He rolls out of the ring and motions for a microphone, which is promptly handed to him by Funyon.

 

Grines: Ladies and gentleman, losers of the world over, I refuse to pin David right now. I’m going to make him SUFFER! He will fall victim to… the “Lightning Rod”!

Axis: The “Lightning Rod”? He only uses that when he really wants to punish someone!

King: All right! We’re going to be able to witness both Omega’s first win in a while AND the end of David Blazenwing’s career! What fun!

Axis: You are a sick individual.

King: Well, I do try. Go lock yourself in a shed.

Axis: What? Wh-whatever do you mean?

King: Ah, forget it. Pay attention, the match is still going on.

 

Grines picks David up and attempts to go for a Falcon Arrow, but David blocks it and starts to hit the Blazen Combination – a left jab, right jab, uppercut to the gut combo. He gets the first two shots off, but before he can hit the third, Grines kicks David hard in the abdomen and hits him with one of his signature moves, an underhook face first piledriver, destroying whatever was left of David. He looks down at his beaten and battered opponent and laughs, then picks David up and tosses him into the corner. He sets David up on the top rope and the crowd boos in anticipation… they know what is coming – the “Lightning Rod”. He gets David in the piledriver position on the top rope and is about to execute the move when out of nowhere, David drops down from the top rope while still holding Grines’ legs… driving his opponent’s crotch straight into the turnbuckle post!

 

King: Oh god! That’s going to leave one HELL a mark.

Axis: You couldn’t pay me enough money to get me into the position Grines is in right now.

King: Oh, there are positions you WILL get into for money? You sick freak!

Axis: Okay, you know what? I don’t know you. I mean it.

 

With Grines recovering from the crotch drop, David seizes the opportunity and hobbles to the other side of the ring, bounces off the ropes and lands the “Full Effect Leg Drop” on Grines.

 

Axis: The “Full Effect Leg Drop”! One of David Blazenwing’s finishing maneuvers!

King: I don’t recall reading about that on his bio sheet… where did it come from?

Axis: I’ve heard it’s a bit of a secret move he has. He only uses it when absolutely necessary.

King: Okay… what are you, president of the David Blazenwing fan club?

Axis: Well… I’m not NOT president of the David Blazenwing fan club.

King: You are one sad, strange man with many problems.

Axis: We both are! That’s why we make such a good team!

King: I know you’re not talking about me right now.

Axis: (sighs) Why do I even bother?

 

With Grines down from the leg drop, David gears up to lock in the “Davemission”. He motions for Grines to get up, standing in one spot posing and twitching like he can’t wait to get off the move (think The Rock before a “Rock Bottom”). Grines slowly rises to his feet and before he can turn around to face his adversary, David appears behind him and wraps his arms around Grines’ neck. The “Davemission” is in! Grines tries to break free but doesn’t have enough energy left after taking the crotch drop and the leg drop in such close succession. With his energy depleted, he also can’s make it to the ropes and thus, has no choice but to tap out to the “Davemission”!

 

Axis: He did it! David Blazenwing won the match with a “Davemission”!

King: Aww… there goes my twenty bucks…

 

Kivell calls for the bell. The bell rings and after a match full of mayhem, madness and a false finish…

 

Funyon: Ladies and gentleman, here is your winner… David Blazenwing!!!

 

“Headstrong” hits the house speakers and David Blazenwing goes up to the turnbuckle to celebrate. However, by now, Grines has gotten up and he is pissed about losing again, especially to a rookie! This angers him to the point where he attacks Matthew Kivell, takes back his tazer and runs up behind David, stabbing him in the back with the tazer and electrocuting him. While Grines celebrates his attack, David rolls out of the ring, reaches underneath, takes out his signature weapon (a Nintendo Gamecube) and rolls back into the ring, sneaking up behind Grines and bashing him over the head with the video game system, knocking him senseless. David motions for a mic as the crowd cheers him on.

 

David: Rule number one… know your opponent, inside and out. Rule number two… come prepared for anything!

 

With this, David pulls up his shirt to reveal a plush, padded shirt underneath… not strong enough to cushion a blow, but perfect for stopping an electrical shock from reaching the skin! David poses a bit more for the crowd and then heads off to the back, Gamecube in hand as Grines still lay unconscious in the middle of the ring.