The Dames' Diatribe on NWA:TNA Week 35

[Guest TSMAdmin]

The Dames Diatribe on NWA:TNA Week 35

 

 

Hello and welcome back to your NWA:TNA review for this week.

 

Before I go straight to it (Angel's new tonight and I'm already not getting enough sleep as it is), I'd like to thank everyone at TheSmartMarks Forums for helping me make the upgrade to Invision Board 1.1 a smooth one. If you guys haven't checked it out...now is the time!

 

Let's hit it!

 

The show starts out with a video package recapping last weeks events, like always, concentrating on the "departure" of Vince Russo and Jeff Jarrett's world title contenders.

 

As the intro fades out, Jarrett comes out immediately with a baseball bat, heading towards the SEX locker room. He's looking for Eric Watts apparently, although I'm not sure why he went towards SEX looking for him.

 

Konnan comes out and introduces Damien and Halloween as the tag team opponents for Jerry Lynn in the following match (EN ESPANOL~!).

 

Jerry Lynn & David Young vs. Damien & Halloween (w/ Konnan)

 

Match Background: Jerry Lynn has been frustrating Konnan for the past several weeks now, defeating every luchador that Konnan has thrown at him. Ever since Konnan claimed that Lynn ripped off the lucha libre style, Lynn has squared off with The SAT's in Week 32, Juventud Guerrera in Week 33 and Super Crazy last week. This week, Konnan has chosen to throw two luchadors at him again but didn't tell anyone who they would be until just a moment ago. Lynn made David Young tap out in Week 31 when he eliminated him in the 8 man elimination match to determine the #1 contender for the X title. However, Lynn chose David Young as a tag team partner for tonight, although Young has nothing to do with the luchador vs. X Division storyline, but hasn't been doing much as of late anyway.

 

The Match: Tenay gives us the scoop on Damien and Halloween immediately, telling us that they are 2/3rd's of the EMLL trio tag champs along with Psicosis and come to the ring wearing the belts. Konnan joins Tenay and West at the announce table as Lynn comes to the ring with Young. The luchadors attack from behind and begin doubleteaming on David Young with a reverse powerbomb. He comes back with a double clothesline as Konnan says that Young is "so brutal, he belongs on the next taping of Tough Enough 4." Too easy a set up, I'm sorry, I just can't take it. Young out of nowhere gets his SNAP SPINEBUSTER~! but Damien kicks out at 2! WTF? Anyway, Halloween and Damien begin doubleteaming on Young again as they take over. They actually pull off a Poetry In Motion on Young in the corner, but damn if it was in slow-mo. Konnan argues with Tenay about Lynn's victories these past few weeks by making up tons of excuses for his boys, such as jet let and the weather. Lynn gets tagged in and takes control on Damien, getting a 'rana for two and tosses Halloween to the outside. Young goes over the top onto Halloween with a pescado, but comes up selling the knee. Konnan goes to "check if he's hurt", but ends up dropkicking him in said knee. In the ring, Damien places Lynn on the top rope and hits a SUPER MUSCLE BUSTER~! (or Mexican Stretch Buster for you SD4) fans, but Lynn kicks out at two. I HATE when people kick out of such devastation! Konnan makes his way back to the announce table, claiming that he slipped on his way to help him, resulting in the dropkick as the luchadors doubleteam Lynn some more. Young is helped to the back as Damien and Halloween go for a doubleteam reverse powerbomb again, but Lynn is able to roll up Damien for the pin! Why does my namesake have to job? Oh....because he spells it with an E, that's why.

 

Winners: Jerry Lynn & David Young

 

Konnan gets into the ring and begins to argue with Halloween and Damien, like he did with Super Crazy and Juvi last week. Jerry Lynn comes into the ring to defend them for some reason, but as he turns around, Konnan attacks him and has to be pulled off by D&H.

 

My Opinion: Once again, the main problem that I have with this storyline is that Jerry Lynn is overcoming all of the odds. They bring in these great wrestlers from Mexico, they do the job and that's it. Shouldn't one of them have beaten him by now? I can understand TNA wanting to book the X Division over the lucha libre style, but throw them a bone once in a while. Anyway, Young didn't seem to do much in the match and D&H didn't seem like anything to write home about tonight. Considering that the match was short and only really picked up when Lynn was in, it only gets about a 1/2* from me.

 

We go to the back with Goldylocks as she tries to get a word with Eric Watts. This is all she gets to say: "After all that's happened tonight, I've got to say that you're a marked man. AHHH!!!!!!!!!" The screaming occurs as Jeff Jarrett comes CHARGING at Watts and nailing him! Officials have to separate them as Watts picks up Jeff Jarrett's baseball bat and heads towards the ring!

 

He heads to the ring, looking even more like Bryan Adams this week. He gets on the stick and says that he's gotten in Jeff's head. Jarrett comes running out again, but security is right behind him. They meet in the ring, both wielding baseball bats and WHAM, the bats COLLIDE~! Security then separates them again. Yawn.

 

Goldylocks is in the back again, this time with Kid Kash and Trinity. Now, either this was pre-taped or she's composed herself very quickly. She talks about Kash's winning streak as of late. Kash starts cutting his promo, but Amazing Red interrupts. Now, don't get me wrong...Red still sounds incredibly nervous here, but he didn't flub any lines. He basically tells Kash that the only reason why he's X Champ is because of Trinity and tells him to prove he's worthy of the title by leaving her in the back.

 

All of a sudden, a video package starts up with footage of the Middle East in chaos as it reads (with a voiceover): "Taken Hostage by an Oppressed Dictator, Held Captive by a Tyrannical Regime, After Five Years, The Handcuffs Are Off, The Chains of Captivity Have Been Broken, Tonight...he is Free.....

 

D-LO BROWN! ARE YOU DOWN!?"

 

D'LO BROWN IS IN NWA:TNA! He gets a huge reaction as he walks down the ramp! MASSIVE "D'Lo" Chant as he gets into the ring and gets on THE STICK~! Apparently, he's got a World Title shot written into his TNA contract, according to Tenay and West. He says that everyone's been asking him if or when he's going to shoot on WWE, but after the reaction he just got, they aren't worth his time. Surprisingly, that gets a pop. I figured they'd be pissed he didn't say anything juicy! Another "D'Lo" chant erupts. He talks about how he was depushed after being heralded as a great up and coming in 2000. He makes no mention of the Droz incident though. He was told he can't cut a promo, so he was sent to OVW. "I can't get over, but I'm supposed to go down there and show them how to get over? See the fact of the matter is, I got tired of banging my head against the glass ceiling! I got tired of people putting themselves ahead, just because they can." He's been looking for a level playing field and now he's got one at NWA:TNA. LARGE "TNA" chant as the Nashville crowd are FINALLY awake! He promises that he will be a bonafide superstar in NWA:TNA.

 

This brings out "Ace in the Hole" Sonny Siaki for some reason and he comes into the ring with a mic of his own. Tenay lets us know that Desire isn't here this week due to an illness in the family. He shakes D'Lo's hand and introduces himself as "Ace in the Hole" Sonny Siaki. He offers him a slot in S.E.X, saying that due to his past relationship with Vince Russo, he knows that Russo would want him to join. D'Lo takes offense to any "relationship" with Vince Russo and tells him that he didn't come to TNA to be part of a group. He declines the offer....so Siaki says "Hey man...I thought that rasicm angle with Teddy Long was a work, but the more and more we talk, I realize that you are one stupid-" and gets NAILED by D'Lo! MONSTROUS Sky High off the ropes to a HUGE pop! He heads to the top....LO DOWN~!

 

My Two Cents: It's nice to see D'Lo Brown given some proper mic time. He was never a bad promo guy and has a lot of charisma. Also, he was wearing a black t-shirt that read "DLB" on the front in a small circle and on the back it read "Are you Down?" Shirts like that sell and he could be very marketable for TNA if they use him correctly. Also, he's not too shabby a worker and could definitely prosper here. I've been a fan of his for years, but I didn't start marking out for him like mad until I whipped ass with him in Wrestlemania 2000 for N64. Yeah, I can beat all of you with D'LO BROWN. What! Oh, that goes for No Mercy too, but not WMx8...I can't stand that piece of garbage.

 

As for his angle with Siaki, I'm glad they established immediately that he's on his own and Siaki wasn't bad on the mic tonight either. It seems like he's really found his niche with this angle.

 

Kid Kash (w/Trinity) vs. Red vs. Jonny Storm for the NWA:TNA X-Division Title

 

Match Background: Storm gets a title shot tonight despite never wrestling in TNA before. He's wrestled in various indys across the county, such as Ring of Honor I believe. Red faced Kid Kash last week and lost clean, but was given a title shot again tonight as he felt that Trinity helped Kash win last week by "sacrificing" herself on a high risk move.

 

The Match: The match is called a 3 way dance, but it's under first pinfall "Triple Threat" rules. Kid Kash comes down with Athena as he doesn't give a DAMN if he can't win a match on his own, yo. Sadly, Trinity gets a slightly bigger pop than Red in the boxing style intros. The match starts with all three men countering the hell out of each other until all 3 try a dropkick at the same time. They nip up at the same time, hitting a 3 way Indy Applause Stance, which pisses me off 33% more than it usually does! Not to mention that Storm nipped up onto Kash's foot and lost his own footing in the process. Kash and Storm shake hands, Storm and Red shake hands, but Red gives Kash the finger and now ITS ON, PUNK! Red hits a dropkick on Kash, but Storm hits a sloppy reverse suplex on Red. Kash gets up and gets the advantage on Storm, but eats an enzeguiri. Cool spot as Storm ranas Red off the top into the awaiting arms of Kash who powerbombs him down for a broken up two. Tenay and West ask for a replay....but we get none. It seems as if THEY can see it in their monitors though as they react to them. Kash with the BANK ROLL~! on Storm, but it ONLY gets a two count to bother me. Red gets CODE RED~! but only gets two. Storm places Red on the top again, but Red counters with a 2nd rope Downward Spiral for two. Red heads back up top with his back facing the ring, but Storm leaps up from behind and reverse ranas him back into the ring! Once again, they react to a replay we can't see. Kash and Storm begin slapping the hell out of their chests as Tenay gives props to the production crew for last week. Their point is that they were ONLY off the air for 4 minutes, although I'm sure people were upset that they paid for 4 minutes of dead air time and TONS of production errors last week. Red sends Storm flying into the ropes and hits the 718 on him. Kash nails Red down and then his a springboard somersault dropkick across the ring on Storm! Tenay and West area all "look at this!" for the replay, but we CANT SEE ANY! Kash and Red battle back and forth before they collide with a cross body block as all 3 men are down. They battle each other as they're getting up, but Red gets the advantage and heads towards the top. Storm follows him and sets up a German suplex off the top, but Kash gets behind Storm and does it, sending all 3 men flying across the ring! Trust me, it didn't look nearly as good as the Super German from last week. Tenay: "Here's the replay....MY GOD!" No replay for us. Kash SMACKS Storm in the mouth with a dropkick, but Storm comes back with a midair dropkick of his own. Storm reverses a reverse powerbomb into a DDT somehow and Kash is sent to the outside! Storm runs to gain momentum to leap outside, but Red clotheslines him down and HE goes to the outside onto Kash. Trinity wets her beak in this match by moonsaulting off the top to the outside, barely grazing Red and almost breaking her kneecaps in the process. Storm then comes off the top with a somersault to the outside, but Trinity EATS THAT! Red is down, Kash is up and he throws Storm into the ring. Moonsault cross body block by Kash gets only a two! Storm charges at Kash in the corner, but gets elevated over his head onto the 2nd rope. Storm leaps backwards and "ranas" Kash down for two in a move he calls The Rewind. Well, I write "ranas" because he BARELY grazed him and Kash did most of the flipping. He goes for the move again in the other corner, but Kash is able to catch it and flip out. Kash picks him up.....MONEY MAKER~! ONE...TWO...THREE!

 

Winner: Kid Kash

 

Post match, Red gets in Trinity's face at ringside and gets into a shoving match with both her and Kash. Red goes to strike Kash, but ends up getting whipped into the turnbuckle...

 

My Opinion: Considering all of the hoopla about Jonny Storm, he really didn't do anything to endear me to him tonight. All I saw was a bunch of sloppy spots from him. The Kash/Red portions of the match were strongest, except for Trinity EATING that somersault off the top by Storm. It seems as if a heel turn is in the works for either Red or Kash, but either way, Jerry Lynn has a title shot down the road so I don't think Kid Kash is losing the title any time soon. *1/2.

 

In the back, Goldylocks is with Sonny Siaki, who complains about having no back up when D'Lo attacked him. All 3 members of XXX are seen in the background as Sanders comes in and begins to taunt Siaki. This leads to a shoving match and a punch to the face by Sanders. Gilberti starts talking and cuts an EXCELLENT promo, giving the guys a pep talk and telling them to get their act together. "Management doesn't give a f*ck about us individually, but together we can run this place. Now let's get our A-game and KICK SOME ASS!" The Harris Brothers then say that if anyone of them have a problem with what Gilberti said, they'll have to deal with them. Personally speaking, Sanders and anyone of the guys in XXX would be alright on their own, IMO.

 

The Harris Brothers vs. Steve Corino & The Sandman

 

Match Background: Corino & The Sandman last wrestled as a team three weeks ago against Low-Ki and Raven. This is just an extension of Corino & The Sandman vs. S.E.X.

 

The Match: As the Harris Brothers come to the ring, Tenay and West put over Gilberti's leadership and his pep talk, so you know that I'm not B.S.ing you guys. Sandman takes forever for his ring entrance, like always, so Corino starts the match himself. Corino gives one of the Harris' an UGLY Stunner to start and a DDT to the other. As Sandman walks back towards the ring, the Harris' nail the H-bomb and the match is over just like that!

 

Winners: The Harris Brothers

 

Sandman starts hitting the Harris' with the weakest cane shots I've ever seen him throw as they begin brawling in the crowd. Corino goes to help Sandman, but ends up carving up his forehead for our personal enjoyment, like always. This is probably the worst I've ever seen Sandman brawl...

 

My Opinion: Who did Steve Corino piss off!? This match was seriously about 10 seconds long and Corino just did a clean job for no real reason. I can understand if it were to set up a Corino heel turn on Sandman, but he helped Sandman out. I can even understand if they wanted to put over the pep talk's effect on the Harris' brothers, but that could have been done with a regular clean win instead of a 10 second dud. Oh yeah....this is a DUD.

 

Goldylocks is in the back with Mike Sanders, who's joined by the blondie from last week, Holly Wood. She asks him about Sanders being on his A-game....to which Sanders says he only has A-Game. He starts looking for his "B-Game" down Holly Wood's shirt and in the bathroom stall, but nope...no B-Game says our God. Goldy says that he's got a mystery opponent. Sanders says that it's probably enhancement talent who'll make him look like a million bucks. Damn, Sanders rules.

 

Gilberti interrupts and asks him if he's even listening to himself. "You think I'm a clown? The difference between me and you is that I've actually done something in this business before. Just because you're Kevin Nash's buddy doesn't mean a thing. If you were really his buddy, you'd be where he is right now". In a hospital bed in rehab? Yes, I'll be here all week! "After this promo you just cut, you better beat him or else don't bother coming back through this door." Sanders walks out, but Gilberti then addresses Holly Wood as "Miss I've been here two weeks and already I get some camera time". He tells her that all she's got is "tits and ass" and tonight is her only chance to show her "assets."

 

Gilberti in charge of SEX is good TV to me.

 

Dusty Rhodes comes down to the ring accompanied by Extremely Crappy Music. It's SO crappy...I LIKE IT! He calls out the Sins of the Father (I made that up), but only Lawler and Flair came out with Eric Watts conspicuous by his absence. Flair comes down to the ring with his father's NWA title. He tries to tell them that Jeff Jarrett isn't responsible for their underachievement. He tells David Flair that he's not worthy of even HOLDING the NWA World Title. Hell, I held the real WWE and WCW World Title in my hands this time last year. Wanna know how? Email me. He calls him an asshole before moving onto Brian Lawler.

 

He tells Brian Lawler that he's got tons of charisma, but he acts like a fool all the time. Lawler starts taking his shirt off, to which Dusty responds "You don't wanna do that....you don't wanna get nekkid on me if you know what i'm talking about". He begins praising Lawler, to which he buys into, but then slaps him across the face. "You could be king alright....king of DEEZ NUTS!" That's right ladies and gentlemen...Dusty Rhodes just said DEEZ NUTS. Dusty starts wailing on them with the Flip Flop and Fly, but succumbs to the both of them until D'LO shows up and Sky High's Lawler! Flair tries to save Lawler as Eric Watts comes into the ring and starts beating on Dusty! Jeff Jarrett comes down to make the save and they clear the ring of the heels.

 

My Two Cents: I'm not too sure what the point of that promo was as Dusty didn't really tell them anything special. D'Lo helping him out was surprising. I really don't care too much about the 2nd generation wrestlers angle.

 

AMW get a nice video package, building them up and talking about what they're going to do. Great, now I'm talking in EWR speech.

 

Goldylocks is back in the SEX locker room again with XXX, but Low-Ki does all of the talking. He refutes Gilberti's claims that XXX's heart don't lie with SEX just because they're constantly overseas...they're just spreading the cause. 'Ki reminds Goldy that they were never defeated for the tag titles and they'll regain them tonight. I've heard Low-Ki speak so many times and have even spoken to him in person and I still can't believe that his voice is THAT deep. Just makes him more intimidating, which he needs due to his size.

 

Sanders comes down to the ring and gives us a HEY~! before he gets on THE STICK~! He says that there are no problems in SEX and he's going to dedicate the following match to Vince Russo. It then turns out his opponent is...HOOO!!!!

 

Mike Sanders vs. Hacksaw Jim Duggan (w/2x4)

 

Match Background: A few weeks ago, Sanders and Gilberti said that the cartoonish characters of old weren't going to cut it in the business anymore, citing Hacksaw Jim Duggan as an example. That's about it....

 

The Match: Hacksaw's music sounds like it's being played off a phonograph. Funny moment as Hacksaw greets Tenay and then asks West to "give him one", but West doesn't know what he's talking about. He meant to give him a "HOOOOO!!!", but West just gives him a "ho..." sounding more like Regis Philbin than Don West. Hacksaw gets the crowd going with a LOUD USA chant. This crowd is actually alive tonight! Sanders stalls for a bit before starting the match off as Hacksaw gets the crowd to clap along with him. Sanders gets some right hands, but Hacksaw no sells everything and clotheslines him a few times. Sanders bails again. Sanders eventually gets the advantage with some chokes, but Duggan no sells those too. A few restholds later (with heel tactics by Sanders) leads to Duggan getting up and missing a charge in the corner. Sanders goes for a 2nd rope moonsault and misses but Duggan gets up and hits a running clotheline for the pin.

 

Winner: Hacksaw Jim Duggan

 

After the match, Gilberti comes down to chew out Sanders and end up beating up Hacksaw Jim Duggan.

 

My Opinion: Poor Sanders. He said that enhancement talent makes you look like a million bucks....but tonight Duggan made him look like 10 cents. I don't understand the point of jobbing Sanders to Duggan though. He really showed his age tonight, but he was never much of a worker to begin with. DUD

 

Goldylocks is with AJ Styles at Raven's Nest. Styles is sitting there, taunting Raven with the fact that he's there. He makes it clear that he's going to beat Raven tonight and then move on to beat JJ for the World Title. Hey, that reminds me....what happened to JJ Dillon?! Here one week as the commish, out the next.

 

Anyway, Raven comes up the stairs to get at AJ, but Styles throws a chair at his head. A "smashmouth" if you will. The Harris Brothers hold Raven back....

 

We get a video package about the tag title situation. It covers the vacancy and the tournament leading up to tonight's match.

 

AMW vs. XXX for the NWA World Tag Team Titles

 

Match Background: XXX won the tag team titles from AMW in Week 28 and then cost them a match against the Rock & Roll Express the following week. Since then, AMW have been trying to get a rematch. The titles were held up when XXX and the Disciples hooked up and the match resulted in a double pin. A tourney was held to decide who would face XXX for the vacant tag titles (since they technically didn't lose them) and AMW won it. Low-Ki was successful in having the Disciples eliminated, but wasn't able to keep AMW from getting the shot. Since then, XXX have been out of the country and AMW haven't been able to get their shot til now.

 

The Match: After the boxing style ring intros, it's made clear that the combination Daniels and 'Ki are going to defend the titles since they've been doing it 3-man Demolition style. That's pretty funny if you know Daniels history with Low-Ki in the Ring of Honor promotion. I believe this is the first time that Elix has been left out of a XXX tag match. Daniels and 'Ki start the match by attacking AMW at the bell, but end up brawling at ringside. Back in the ring finally, Chris Harris gets a NICE cross body off the top onto Daniels for two. Doubleteam missile dropkick by AMW leads to the double team move they ALWAYS blow...and for once, they DON'T BLOW IT! All of that for a really stupid looking move that doesn't even look like it hurts. TAKE IT OUT OF YOUR ARSENAL AMW! They try literally throwing Daniels at 'Ki, but he's smartened up since the last time they faced each other and ducks. 'Ki instead gets thrown at Daniels, so ha. Elix gets on the apron, to give Daniels the advantage with an enziguiri and 'Ki tags in to face James Storm. He chops Storm for a bit before hitting him in the back with a STIFF~! kick and now I remember why I missed Low-Ki so much. Daniels comes back in for the doubleteam camel clutch/dropkick for two. Storm, now in the ring with 'Ki, goes for a dropkick, but 'Ki holds on and drops a THICK elbow on Storm for dos. Heel tactics by Chris Daniels pisses off Harris, giving XXX more time to beat up on Storm, like good heel teams do. Storm elbows out of a Daniels chinlock, but succumbs to a leg lariat. 'Ki gets back in, but Storm KILLS HIM with a clothesline and both men are down! 'Ki tags out to Daniels, who nails Harris before working over Storm again. Storm is able to get a free moment and go for the tag, but Low-Ki cuts him off! Daniels ends up clotheslining Low-Ki accidentally, allowing Storm to tag in Harris who becomes a HOUSE....EN...FUEGO~! Well, not really, but I just wanted to get one catchphrase out there tonight. Left arm clotheslines on Daniels sets up a full nelson slam for two! Running powerslam by Harris also gets a two count. Low-Ki goes for a springboard roundhouse, but gets caught with a sit down powerbomb for deux! HART ATTACK~! by AMW on Daniels segues into the DEATH SENTENCE~! for ONE...TWO...NO! The ref is pulled out by Low-Ki! Elix gets in the ring and hits the Play of the Day on Storm! Daniels covers....ONE...TWO...NO! Low-Ki in the ring now...he goes for the Cartwheel kick on Harris in the corner, but gets SPEARED IN MID AIR! ONE...TWO...NO! Harris puts the Sharpshooter on Daniels!!! Elix comes into the ring with a chair, but get Superkicked by Storm! Rudy the ref is on the outside with Elix as Daniels taps out, but Low-Ki is able to get Harris off before the ref comes back! He goes for another springboard roundhouse but Harris catches him....CATATONIC~! There's still no ref! Daniels has a tag belt and goes to nail Harris, but he blocks it and nails Daniels! Rudy saw that and chastises Harris, taking the belt away from him. As he turns his head, Low-Ki comes from behind and nails Harris with the other tag title! Daniels covers...ONE...TWO...THREE! XXX are the Tag Team Champions again!

 

Winners: XXX

 

My Opinion: The match was great, on par with their first match when XXX won the titles originally. I'm glad that XXX kept the titles here because frankly, having AMW as the tag team champions again would have made the tag division a bit more stale. They need more teams, definitely. I also like the fact that XXX can switch up team members, so that gives it another dynamic as well. Here's to a long title reign, with no vacancies, hopefully. ***

 

In the parking lot, Sonny Siaki is attacking D'Lo Brown due to what happened earlier, but Jeff Jarrett chases him away...D'Lo and Jeff on the same page? I guess they'll just forget about their WWF feud where Jarrett took the EuroContinental Title from D'Lo.

 

Glen Gilberti comes down to the ring with Holly Wood, now wearing a bikini top that reads "Bad" and "Ass" on each breast. He says that Russo's vision was to take S.E.X. out of Nashville because they belong in Hollywood. This gets him a "Disco sucks" chant. He says that he knows the people want "tits and ass" and the crowd stops riding him after that. He says that Holly Wood is making an open challenge to any woman who wants "a piece of ass". The fans want Athena, but Gilberti tells her "Sorry honey, if I paid a nickel for you, I'd get change back." The fans start chanting for Miss Lollipop. Disco then invites her down to the ring...and she accepts!

 

She gets into the ring and takes off her big ass high heels and immediately gets into a catfight with Holly Wood! Don West hits about a .1 Styles with his "CATFIGHT" shrill. They catfight for a WHILE....but then Lollipop actually pops out! Her nipples are the same color as the rest of her chest....weird. She gets off of Holly Wood to fix herself. She starts pounding on Holly Wood's back, but Holly Wood pops up and RIPS OFF HER SHIRT! I'm talking FULLY TOPLESS! Hey....this IS pay per view!

 

(Note: Watching this is slow motion is absolutely hilarious...just because you can literally count the number of people in the audience with their mouth open. Yes, I watched this in slow motion and you would too. Shut up.)

 

Naturally, the fans go WILD as Jeremy Borash comes into the ring to try and cover her up. She charges at Holly Wood again, bare chested and all, but eventually, heads to the back covering herself...

 

Poor Tenay and West try to somehow get the crowds attention again to hype the main event.

 

Raven vs. AJ Styles in a #1 Contenders match

 

Match Background: Ever since Raven and AJ Styles both made it known that they wanted the NWA Title, they've been at each others throats. In Week 29, Raven got into his first physical confrontation with AJ Styles as Raven had stolen the NWA Title from Jarrett and told AJ that he'd have to go through HIM in order to get a title shot. Things escalated in subsequent weeks with Raven and AJ brawling in the back and in the ring along with Raven dislocating two of AJ's fingers at one point. After AJ Styles got a title shot and lost, he tried to join SEX, but Raven was against it. AJ faced the Sandman as Raven faced an X-Division competitor due to comments they made about each other not being able to survive in the others' element. Raven helped AJ defeat Sandman though and vice versa. They've gotten into brawl with Jeff Jarrett separately and together and last week ended up brawling after Raven's Clockwork Orange House of Fun. Tonight, we'll find out who goes up against Jeff Jarrett for the NWA World Title. This can be a great clash of styles (no pun intended) as Bryan Staebell excellently pointed out in his Week 35 Preview on TheSmartMarks.com.

 

The Match: Jeff Jarrett comes down to ringside to commentate on the match and scout his competition. He puts over being the NWA champ before the match starts, to try and hype up his upcoming defense a bit. AJ Styles now has a video package leading him to the ring....bout time they've done something like that. Styles and Raven go nose to nose at the start, with Raven taking down AJ. Jarrett says that Styles has the advantage when it comes to speed and agility. Styles goes for the Styles Clash on Raven, which JARRETT points out, but Raven bails. He talks about their diverse styles in the ring as Raven crotches AJ on the outside on the guardrail. He says that Raven is going to use his veteran moves and counter AJ's high risk maneuvers with experience. Now THIS is the kind of color commentating that we need! They then talk about conditioning and how Jarrett knows he can go the distance because of his conditioning. The fight spills to the outside, with Raven taunting Jarrett at the announce table. The ref admonishes Jarrett for some reason, allowing Raven to nail AJ with a steel chair. AJ is BLEEDING...so take him off the list of guys who've never bladed on TV. Back in the ring, Raven hits a running knee lift, sold SO well by Styles! I haven't seen anyone sell a knee lift like that since the late Curt Hennig in the early 90's. Raven puts on a sleeper on Styles, but its reversed by AJ. Raven jawbreaks out of it as you get a close up of AJ's bloody face. West makes a good point about how AJ needs to start implementing his X-Division offense in order to beat Raven tonight. The crowd is split in their chants as it sounds like "Ray J". AJ gets up and hits two discus clotheslines and tries to follow it up with his quebrada/DDT combo, but Raven moves out of the way. AJ gets the reverse DDT anyway for two. Raven elevates AJ over the top rope, but Styles lands on the apron and gives him a neckbreaker over the ropes! AJ comes in with a springboard, but Raven powerbombs him down for two! Raven goes for an irish whip, but Styles gets a superkick for two! NICE rana by Styles gets a two! AJ counters another Raven irish whip into an Evenflow DDT for two!!! Raven bails and AJ goes over the top with a pescado! Raven kneels down and AJ EATS RAVENS KNEE!!! Raven gets up and piefaces Jarrett, prompting him to get up and begin brawling with both men! Security tries to stop Jarrett and they follow him up the ramp....

 

AJ comes off the top with a missile dropkick, but the ref gets it and he is DOWN! Raven gets the Evenflow DDT! Another ref from the back....ONE...TWO...NO! Raven hits a running forearm in one corner and goes to do it again in another and kills the SECOND ref! STYLES CLASH~! ONE...TWO...NO! Raven picks up a chair...Raven swings as AJ goes for an enziguiri! They BOTH hit each other and they're down....both men have arms over each other....two refs....double pin! I HATE THAT!

 

Winner: None, Double Pin

 

My Opinion: Another LAME double pin finish! Why not just book a triple threat match to begin with after the Jarrett double DQ? TNA has overused that finish plenty of times already and anything else would have been better. The match was starting to heat up just when it was cut off at the legs... **1/2

 

The PPV ends with no decisive winner.....

 

Overall: Dammit, had the last match had a clean finish, I would have been completely pleased with tonight's broadcast. We got a good tag title match with the right guys going over, D'Lo Brown debuting, no Vince Russo taking up too much air time and toplessness....how could you go wrong? A non finish in your main event. Well, no matches were announced for next week, but I can assume that a triple threat World Title match is on the horizon.

 

'Til next week,

 

The Dames, Damian Gonzalez

 

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