If-then statements

[Guest goodhelmet]

then they would be porn stars

 

If Chris Benoit and Rick Flair had a match to see who was God

[Guest Some Guy]

Then Benoit would win in the present.

 

If someone tried to convince you Benoit wasn't god

[Guest goodhelmet]

then I would present that person with the Benoit-Jericho series, Benoit-Booker T series, Benoit in Japan, and Benoit-Austin, thus proving that Benoit IS God

 

If Bret Hart was bitter at Benoit for being God

[Guest Tony149]

Then they're right. Flair is GOD. Benoit can be the son of GOD.

 

If Benoit & Flair have a match

[Guest Some Guy]

Then we'll like it and Flair will blade

 

If Flair didn't blade

[Guest CED Ordonez]

Then we'd all question his title of "The Man"

 

If the Bossman was the most over wrestler

[Guest goodhelmet]

then I would be surprised

 

If Bret Hart was bitter at Benoit for being God

[Guest Tony149]

Then his hair wouldn't turn red

 

If Vince Russo & Stephanie McMahon got into a fight

[Guest goodhelmet]

then Steph would beat Russo's ass

 

If Russo was Vince MCmahon's other son

[Guest Tony149]

Then they fit well together

 

If Paul Heyman got into a fight with Jim Cornette with JR as guest referee

[Guest goodhelmet]

then JR would cheat to make Heyman lose.

 

If Jim Ross ate Jerry Lawler's left arm

[Guest Tony149]

Then it's one less arm Jerry can use to jack off when PUPPIES appear

 

If JR explained what the hell "booger red" means

[Guest goodhelmet]

then he would have to pick his nose

 

If the San Antonio Spurs win their game on Wednesday

[Guest Tony149]

Then they have a 14 game win streak (I think it's 14)

 

If the Spurs choked against the Lakers in the playoffs

[Guest goodhelmet]

then it would be nothing new

 

If Sacramento defeated the Lakers in the playoffs

[Guest Tony149]

Then the Spurs will have to run over the Kings

 

If San Antonio gets the WNBA team

[Guest goodhelmet]

then goodhelmet would still not give a shit about the WNBA

 

If Tim Duncan was a wrestler

[Guest Tony149]

Then Vince names him "The Turtle"

 

If local news sucks

[Guest goodhelmet]

then Tony should watch the Simpsons instead

 

If Jerry Seinfeld was a wrestler

[Guest Tony149]

Then his catch-phrase would be "yada, yada, yada"

 

If Jerry Springer was a wrestler

 

 

(I watch the Simpsons sometimes at 10, but I watch it after King of the Hill at 5:30. I watch most of those damn dating shows at night. Entertaining shit there.)

[Guest goodhelmet]

then he would be more over than HHH (Jerry-Jerry-Jerry-Jerry!!! )

 

If John Travolta and Stone Cold got into a fight

 

 

 

(speaking of those shows, I think I will cathc some MaddTV before I go to bed, Goodnight)

[Guest Tony149]

Then Austin would make him his bitch

 

If Austin quit the WWF and joined some start up fed

[Guest dreamer420]

he'd be kicking himself in the ass within 2 months.

 

If Tommy Dreamer got a push...

[Guest goodhelmet]

then it would be 1996

 

If Raven and Tommy Dreamer were used effectively during the Invasion

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

they would have got over.

 

If Benoit faced HHH

[Guest JAMES900]

Benoit would be squashed

 

If HHH roided up even more.

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

he would explode.

 

If Spike Dudley roided up

[Guest JAMES900]

He might get a World title shot

 

If Vince banned all roids.

[Guest Big McLargeHuge]

then Trips would retire

 

If Trips retired...

[Guest JAMES900]

The net writers would have to plant the glass celin on someone else

 

If there was no glass celin