If-then statements

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

He'd do his best to no-sell it.

 

If aliens abducted the Hulkster

[Guest goodhelmet]

then hopefully they never bring him back

 

If The Shockmaster wouldn't have tripped

[Guest JAMES900]

he would have still sucked

 

If Crash holly was 7foot 5 and 350 pounds

[Guest goodhelmet]

Then he'd be Giant gonzales

 

If Crash Holly were IC champion

[Guest Big McLargeHuge]

then he would've been jobbed out to Regal by this point because, for some reason, Regal has to have a belt around his waist.

 

If Kevin Nash was run over by a stampede of rabid fans...

[Guest Some Guy]

Then they would have been running at Hogan and he got in the way.

 

If Nash didn't almost kill WWF and then actually kill WCW

[Guest goodhelmet]

then we would have more options as wrestling fans on what to watch

 

If Sting came out of retirement

[Guest Some Guy]

Then he'd start quoting the Bible and other lame shit like that.

 

If Liz came back

[Guest goodhelmet]

then she'd make Debra look young

 

If Randy Savage and Liz remarried

[Guest Some Guy]

Then Savage could beat her all over again.

 

If Gorgeous George showed up at your house

[Guest]

I would mistake him for Goldust.

 

 

If the Yeti broke out of a block of ice again...

[Guest goodhelmet]

( i think you have the wrong gorgeous george )

 

then the WWF is scraping the absolute bottom of the barrel for ideas

 

If Bradshaw received a lariat from Kenta Kobashi

[Guest Some Guy]

(he did have the wrong Gorgeous George)

 

Then he would no-sell it and Kobashi would take his head off with the next one.

 

If Gorgeous George (Macho's ex-chick) came to your house

[Guest Big McLargeHuge]

I'd bone her, fuck her, shag her and sex her everyday for as long as she stays.

 

If Randy Savage came to your house...

[Guest]

I would give him the Big Boot, & the legdrop, because Hulk Hogan does it all of the time.

 

 

If the Natural Disasters came to your house....

[Guest Some Guy]

Then Earthquake would sit on my pet snake and Tugboat would trip on the threshold.

 

If Fred Ottman wasn't Dusty's Brother in Law

[Guest]

The Shockmaster would have never existed.

 

 

If Hulk Hogan came to your house.........

[Guest Some Guy]

I would mark like a little fat girl would for the Hardyz (I'm a real American too, you know)

 

If Dusty Rhodes and Saphire (I know she's dead) came to your house

[Guest]

They would dance and no one would care.

 

 

If the Yeti came to your house.....

[Guest Some Guy]

Then I would laugh at him because Benoit squashed his ass on Nitro (He was Big Ron Studd at the time)

 

If Benoit came to your house

[Guest]

I would stuppidly laugh at his gap and be crossfaced.

 

 

If the Dungeon of Doom came to your house.......

[Guest Some Guy]

Then I would have to cook a BIG dinner.

 

If the Kliq came to your house with Road Dogg and Godfather...

[Guest]

The Drug Ebforcement Agency would raid your house.

 

 

If Bastion Booger came to your house........

[Guest Some Guy]

Then I would tell him I saw him at Survivor Series 93 live at the Garden.

 

If the Gobbley Gooker came to your house

[Guest]

I would make fun of him for being stupid.

 

 

If Brother Love came to your house.....

[Guest Some Guy]

Then I would be scared that he would try to "LOOOOOVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEE Me"

 

If the Ding Dongs came to your house

[Guest]

I would want to know what the Hell they are.

 

 

If Bastion Booger and Rikishi came to your house.......

[Guest goodhelmet]

then I would lock the refrigerator

 

If bastion booger and rikishi had a match

[Guest]

Then it would be the sickest match in WWF history.

 

 

If Loch Ness & Yokozuna formed a Tag Team.......

[Guest Big McLargeHuge]

then they'd be the really really really fat guys.

 

If Steve Corino faced Dusty Rhodes....