How to get Nathan Jones over

[Guest The Czech Republic]

Sooner or later, Nathan Jones will have to make his televised debut. But how will we differentiate him from every other hoss?

 

 

The answer is simple. Give him entrance music by Kylie Minogue. Have him act completely destructive-machine-monster-ish, but just give him the most unlikely upbeat peppy song by Kylie Minogue that can be found. Plus there's the Australian connection and everything.

 

If the idea is to just give him something that sounds disconcertingly effeminate without affecting Jones's persona at all whatsoever, here are some other songs that would work: "I Wanna Be With You" by Mandy Moore, and "Dancing Queen"by the A*Teens. Also strange and Australian would be "Land Down Under" by Men at Work. And if you just want weird music with a sort of underlying connection, I wouldn't mind hearing "Take On Me."

 

Hey, aren't we all tired of generic metal in C-minor?

 

P.S.: Why haven't I seen a "JONES: AUSTRALIAN FOR CRAP" sign in the crowd yet? Have I just not been watching? It has to be out there.

[Guest art_vandelay]

LMAO

 

He'd be my new favourite wrestler if this happened.

[Guest The Czech Republic]

The genius in the gimmick would be that NOBODY acknowledged the fact that he was coming out to "Dancing Queen" or whatever. He wouldn't appear to notice, the commentators wouldn't notice, nothing.

[Guest Memoirs of an Invisible Chevy]

This guy is DOA.

 

He is worse than Steiner, and look how the fans treated him. He became a cartoonish character. He'll be jobbed out ala Mike Awesome, Mark Henry, ect. real soon.

[Guest snuffbox]

unless he suddenly metamorphosis into Bret Hart or something...hes not getting over any way any time soon.

[Guest Redhawk]

Here's another idea: Give him no entrance music, yet have him act like he DOES have entrance music. He could come down the ramp bopping his head like he hears music, then he gets in the ring and says "Cut the music." And when he wins, he says, "Hit the music." That would make him seem crazy and fit into his current character.

[Guest Respect The 'Taker]

I know one way of getting him over with all the smart marks.

 

Fire him.

 

UYI

[Guest The Czech Republic]

Here's another idea: Give him no entrance music, yet have him act like he DOES have entrance music. He could come down the ramp bopping his head like he hears music, then he gets in the ring and says "Cut the music." And when he wins, he says, "Hit the music." That would make him seem crazy and fit into his current character.

If he bobs his head walking down the aisle with no music it'll look like he's on the verge of throwing up. It's the VIEWERS that are supposed to be vomiting during a Jones match, not Nathan himself.

[Guest Jobber of the Week]

They tried this already with Shannon Moore. For his first few weeks in Velocity before the Mattitude thing, he had this incredibly girlie bubblegum pop song that sounded so completely wrong for any guy who has a set.

 

And yes, the announcers didn't notice it or anything.

 

Although Goldberg ought to just switch to "Another One Bites The Dust" and get it over with.

[Guest Jobber of the Week]

By the way, here's an idea: License really BAD music, and give him something difference each week.

 

I already know enough bad songs, as I often listen to a radio station round these parts that plays nothing but BAD MUSIC 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. They play really bad remakes of Beatles tunes, "Covers That Make The Bile Rise In Your Throat", Dentist Office Waiting Room Music, Polka, and more.

 

 

 

Either that, or give him "Bad Boys" by the Inner Circle (the COPS theme) just for shits n' gigles.

[Guest Respect The 'Taker]

Why haven't I seen a "JONES: AUSTRALIAN FOR CRAP" sign in the crowd yet? Have I just not been watching? It has to be out there.

That fucking killed me. Holy shit that was hilarious

[Guest edotherocket]

I think he should be renamed to Nathan the Hoss-tralian.

[Guest Choken One]

Sooner or later, Nathan Jones will have to make his televised debut. But how will we differentiate him from every other hoss?

 

 

The answer is simple. Give him entrance music by Kylie Minogue. Have him act completely destructive-machine-monster-ish, but just give him the most unlikely upbeat peppy song by Kylie Minogue that can be found. Plus there's the Australian connection and everything.

 

If the idea is to just give him something that sounds disconcertingly effeminate without affecting Jones's persona at all whatsoever, here are some other songs that would work: "I Wanna Be With You" by Mandy Moore, and "Dancing Queen"by the A*Teens. Also strange and Australian would be "Land Down Under" by Men at Work. And if you just want weird music with a sort of underlying connection, I wouldn't mind hearing "Take On Me."

 

Hey, aren't we all tired of generic metal in C-minor?

 

P.S.: Why haven't I seen a "JONES: AUSTRALIAN FOR CRAP" sign in the crowd yet? Have I just not been watching? It has to be out there.

Great Idea...I should note...I FUCKING MARK for "I Wanna Be With You" from Mandy...A sweet song if I ever heard one...

[Guest alkeiper]

How about giving him Outback Jack's old gimmick and calling him "Outback Jones" or something. Then get rid of him after one match.

[Guest Pigsy]

Here's another idea: Give him no entrance music, yet have him act like he DOES have entrance music. He could come down the ramp bopping his head like he hears music, then he gets in the ring and says "Cut the music." And when he wins, he says, "Hit the music." That would make him seem crazy and fit into his current character.

Or people will just think he's got super hearing, like a dog.

I think he should use the Lumberjack song from Monty Python.

[Guest commie_050]

Actually, I think they should build his gimmick around the fact that he never wrestles. For example, someone, say Bill DeMott, challenges him to a match on Smackdown. At SD, Jones is nowhere to be seen, but shows up on RAW Monday:

 

Bischoff: Nathan Jones, what the hell are you doing here?

Jones: I've got a match tonite, DeMott is done for.

Bischoff: Um, that was Thursday, this is RAW.

Jones: Oh, um HOW EMBARRASSING! Well, I guess I'll be leaving then ...

Bischoff: Well, actually, there's an empty slot on the booking sheet ...

Jones: OW! My, uh, QUAD! IT'S TORN! Get me to a hospital!

[Guest Army Eye]

They tried this already with Shannon Moore. For his first few weeks in Velocity before the Mattitude thing, he had this incredibly girlie bubblegum pop song that sounded so completely wrong for any guy who has a set.

 

And yes, the announcers didn't notice it or anything.

Yeah, but that's Shannon Moore. He looks so much like a girl the music isn't even out of place.

 

It would stll be great for Jones

[Guest AndrewTS]

I wonder what Kotz will think of this...

 

WCW already did something similar with Tank Abbot already: 3 Count fan.

[Guest the 1inch punch]

Why haven't I seen a "JONES: AUSTRALIAN FOR CRAP" sign in the crowd yet? Have I just not been watching? It has to be out there.

That fucking killed me. Holy shit that was hilarious

I changed my sig the second i saw that.

 

That is brilliant Czech and I saulte you

[Guest buffybeast]

How to get Nathan Jones over? Push him over a cliff.

[Guest the 1inch punch]

That coming from the A-Train Fan

[Guest NoSelfWorth]

Have everyone pretend Jones is a midget.

[Guest saturnmark4life]

I still think he should deliberately blow spots (like the guy from ECW, fuck can't remember his name now) and shout 'Crikey!' To have any chance. Bring him out to dancing queen as well, though.

[Guest razazteca]

have him spill coffee on somebody

[Guest Ash Ketchum]

Coffee Spill=INSTA-FEUD!!!

[Guest The Czech Republic]

Or he can go around shooting hoops and singing about it, and be "Bathaball Jones."

[Guest HartFan86]

He should ride a kangaroo to the ring.

[Guest The Czech Republic]

He should ride a kangaroo to the ring.

and then get out and go "eww, it's a lot slimier than it is in the cartoons!"

[Bored 0]

I'd have Jones and Taker turn out to be gay lovers and come out wearing matching red tights and headbands. Hey Taker already has the gay biker thing going for him.

[Guest Kahran Ramsus]

Getting him over isn't a problem. It's keeping him over once he gets in the ring.

 

I'm generally someone who is pretty forgiving (I have no problem with Big Show or A-Train), but Nathan Jones is so pitiful that he will be booed out of the building once he starts wrestling, ala Steiner. I just can't see him as being anything but the worst actual wrestler since Mark Henry. In this case he is simply too bad in the ring to amount to anything.