My Absence

[Guest Sassquatch]

I would like apologize to the posters (like Corey and HBK16) who have recently suffered in some way recently and to those of you who do not like these types of posts that involve someone's personal life.

 

I rarely parade my personal life's issues out here for everyone to see but in this case I feel it is necessary to let those of you who wondered know why I have not posted at the Smarts in almost two months or why I have not been online in general. You all deserve to know why and I hope this clears things up.

 

On Sunday, February the 23rd, my girlfriend's older brother shot and killed himself.

 

He was 27 years old.

 

Needless to say, both my girlfriend's family and my family were all devastated by this loss. The circumstances that led up to his death shocked us even more after we read his suicide note which basically said that he killed himself since he could not pay off a drug dealer he owed "a ton" of money to and with no other alternatives, he decided to take his own life rather than let everyone know what was going on. The reason that our families were so shocked was because we never even saw anything like this coming. He had graduated at the top of his class in high school along with receiving every academic award created while going to high school and was truly someone that myself and the other young members of the family looked up to. But none looked up to the man who had it all more than my girlfriend. He was her idol, her role model, and her big brother. Her little sister also looked up to her older brother as if he was the measuring stick for how guys in her grade should act around people since he was such a neat guy to be around.

 

During a 3 year period in my life, I was an addict to booze and did almost every drug under the sun. My life was a mess and I was on the fast track to either spending the rest of my life in jail after getting into violent tangles with the local cops, or winding up dead somewhere down the road. I was too weak to do anything about it and just let my actions create their own course. To make a long story short, my girlfriend's older brother was the guy who helped me kick my addictions. While my girlfriend also helped out, it was her older brother who helped me overcome my addictions and for almost 4 years now, I have been clean and sober.

 

I only wish he would have taken his own advice.

 

This guy was one of my good friends and his death had devastated both families. My girlfriend had only cried twice in the time we had been together and when I heard her sobbing, it killed me inside. I wanted to fix it. She stood by me along with her brother when I was on the brink of no return and she always seemed to have an answer for any situation I was involved in.

 

I had never felt this helpless before, both physically and mentally.

 

The next day, my girlfriend's family received a call from the hospital. It turned out that during a routine check-up that her mom had breast cancer and that she would need to start the treatment to get rid of it immediately.

 

"Out of the frying pan and into the fire" they say.

 

This news came at the worst possible time for the family but we persevered and got the houses in order. The mom went to stay at the hospital while the dad stayed with his sister and the two girls would stay with my parents until things improved. But then we got a call later that week from the sister's house letting everyone know that the dad had taken his thing's and left the house. The suicide really hit the dad hard because that was his only son and he had always shown more affection towards him than his girls which is not to say that he did not love them, but he took more of an interest with his son. We all feared that he was going to do something that would cause us to never see him again or land him in prison. The police suspected that he might have known something about the drug dealer and that the dad might have gone looking for him/her.

 

We all feared the worst and figured that we would not see him again.

 

But suddenly, things began to pick up. Later that week the dad came back home and told everyone he had been at his cousin's house fishing in order to take his mind off the events and simply have some time to himself to recover. We were all overjoyed when we found out that he had come home and had not done something he might have regretted.

 

Then earlier this week, we all received the news that my girlfriend's mom was coming back home and that her cancer had gone into remission. This was the bit of news that everyone needed to hear after the trials and tribulations of the past two months that both families have had to deal with.

 

So there you all go.

 

The road to recovery has been a long and arduous one, but after almost two months of being away from the net and having sufficient amount of time to recharge my batteries, I think a return online is constructive.

 

I apologize to those of you who have recently suffered in some way and I wish you all the best.

 

Thank you for your time.

[Guest oldschoolwrestling]

Yo man. God bless you and both families. Hope things can brighten for everyone in any way possible.

[Guest Eagan469]

glad to see you back - all the best to you and your loved ones

[Patty O'Green 0]

I hope that things continue to improve for you and your loved ones

[Guest PencilJobber]

Sorry to hear about all the shit you and your family have gone through man hope life continues to pick up for you guys all the luck in the world for all of you God Bless

[Guest Flyboy]

Sorry to hear about that, Sass.

 

I hope everything turns out okay.

[Guest Vern Gagne]

Hope everything works out. God Bless

 

Drug Addiction is such a horrible thing. Glad to see you've been clean and sober the last 4 years. I'm certain you'll stay that way with the help of your family and friends.

[Guest MrRant]

Good luck with it all.

[Guest Lord of The Curry]

Good luck and God bless.

[Guest areacode212]

I was wondering where you were, Sass. Sorry to hear about all this and I hope your families can manage to cope.

[Guest HBK16]

Like everyone else, Im sorry this had to happen to someone you really cared for. I know how life can treat you and sometimes its not good at all. I hope everything gets better for you and your girlfriend's family.

[Guest RugbyDiva]

Hard times. My thoughts and prayers for a brighter days ahead.

[Guest DrTom]

Welcome back, Sass. May your fortunes continue to improve.

[Guest pinnacleofallthingsmanly]

Good to see you back.

[Guest Zack Malibu]

Good to see you back, Sass. Hope everything stays well from now on.

[Guest cobainwasmurdered]

I'm really sorry Sass. I hope everything works out for you and yours. My sincere condolances.