MLW Underground! (6-9-03)

[Guest nWoScorpion]

- Taped from the TABU arena in Orlando, FL!

 

- Your Commentator, Interviewer, Host, and Shiller is Joey Styles.

 

- Los Maximos cut a pretty pathetic promo to the people who attacked them back at Ft. Lauderdale, and they want them in a match tonight!!

 

- Los Maximos Vs. Samoan Island Tribe:

Jesus why must every Samoan duo be dressed like three minute warning? Los Maximos is Joel & Jose Maximo, and I don't know who the Samoans are. It's Samu & Manna. Jose with a plancha on both Samoans to start. They double team Samu and nail duel avalanche splashes. Baseball slide to Manna and Joel with an elbow drop. Jose does the same and they get caught with a poetry in motion attempt, as Manna slams Jose on top of Joel. Samu posts Jose while Manna works over Joel in the ring. Stall suplex to Joel followed by a side slam by Manna. Double head-BUTT by the Samoans and Samu catches Joel with a big time clothesline. Samu with a back suplex on Joel, and Manna works him over on the outside. Samu with a pathetic reverse crescent kick to Joel and they make a wish. Joel hammers away on Manna and nails an Enziguri. He goes to the top rope and nails a senton bomb. Joel gets caught with a Samoan drop by Manna and Samu tags back in. Super-plex blocked and Joel connects with a moonsault! Jose finally gets the hot tag and he nails a missile drop-kick on Samu. Cross body press to Manna. Double noggin knocker doesn't do anything and they take him down. Double Press Slam on Jose. Manna sets him on the top rope and nails a Samoan drop from the second rope for three at 6:49. * Crowd was dead for this one, and couldn't care less for these fucking Samoans. Heel beat-down ensues on Los Maximos, courtesy of the Fat Ass losers.

 

- La Parka with an incoherrent promo, but he's quickly attacked by Sabu & The Cuban Assassin, and gets stabbed in the head with Sabu's spike before the match even happens.

 

- Joey Styles informs us that P.J Friedman was "seriously" injured last week and may never be able to wrestle again. The Tag Titles will be handed to the Extreme Horsemen at Hybrid Hell. I wonder if the titles look good. The Champions later cut a promo in front of their Horsemen Cam. Nothing earth shattering, just bitching about all the crap given to them in wrestling.

 

- Joey Styles informs us that Vampiro has left MLW. So we get C.M Punk challenging Raven to a rematch at Hybrid Hell, and Raven has accepted. C.M Punk cuts his usual promo about being the cleanest person. He says he will beat Raven, I say, he sucks.

 

- Samoan Island Tribe promo now, and they get attacked by Los Maximos who want revenge, but they are TOO SMALL and the Samoans easily get the upperhand and dish out another ass beating in the locker room.

 

- TOP 10 LIST!!!!

 

World Heavyweight Champion:

Satoshi Kojima

(247 lbs; Tokyo Japan)

 

1. Mike Awesome

(292 lbs; Tampa, FL)

2. Terry Funk

(256 lbs; Double Cross Ranch)

3. Steve Corino

(219 lbs; See Isle, NJ)

4. Sabu

(220lbs, Bombay, India)

5. Raven

(230 lbs; The Bowery)

6. La Parka

(260 lbs; Los Monterrey; Mexico)

7. Masato Tanaka

(238 lbs; Wakayama, Japan)

8. Paul London

(200 lbs; Austin, TX)

9. Christopher Daniels

(224 lbs; Los Angeles, CA)

10. Jerry Lynn

(232 lbs; Minneapolis, MN)

 

- Highlights of Mike Awesome taking out Satoshi Kojima at King of Kings, then again we go to him beating Masato Tanaka via Knockout.

 

- Joey Styles brings us clips from King of Kings, La Parka versus Sabu 1. He says because of the violence and extreme graphic nature, they are no allowed to show the ending due to censors.

 

- La Parka Vs. Sabu (Round 1):

Sabu has Bill Alphonso in his corner for this match. La Parka & Sabu have dueling chairs just incase someone wants to get in a cheap shot. [Clip] La Parka works over Sabu in the corner and they end up trading blows. La Parka gets the upperhand and clotheslines Sabu back in the ring, but misses a slingshot senton, and Sabu with a tornado DDT for two. Modified Crossface by Sabu, but the DDT doesn't work and La Parka connects with a spinning heel kick. Sabu is literally thrown into the first row and La Parka with a weak chair shot to boot. Sabu is whipped into the railing and La Parka with a plancha off the top rope into the crowd on Sabu! La Parka sets up a table and heads back in the ring. La Parka with another chair shot but he gets sent over the top rope and his knee breaks the table. [CLIP] Sabu nails La Parka up in the crowd with another plancha and La Parka is busted open. His mask is ripped and he's got blood all over himself. Might this be a real blood draw, cause that spill over the table looked sick. Back in the ring and Sabu covers him for two. [CLIP] La Parka covers Sabu for two. La Parka puts Sabu in the tree of woe and baseball slides a chair into Sabus face for two! Stiff kicks to the back of Sabu. Sabu hammers away and they both look hurt. La Parka with some stiff kicks again and he posts himself on a charge. Slingshot Plancha by Sabu on La Parka, Sabu sets la Parka on another table and does the top rope leg drop on La Parka through the table! La Parka has a pair of scissors ad we cut away at 10:38. Sabu eventually wins the match via submission I think, but don't quote me on that, but Sabu DOES win. Match looked to be in the **1/2 range for what was shown.

 

- La Parka Vs. Sabu (Round 2):

La Parka has a WEIRD fucking upper body helmet on, much like Vaders elephant head, except it looks like something from lord of the rings. This match is in its entirety by the way. La Parka has his chair in hand and we get a pose down. La Parka is not wearing his traditional ring attire, but it pretty much resembles it except with a vest and white arms. Sabu with a quick roll up for two and he works an arm breaker. La Parka with a go behind but Sabu trips him up into a leg-lock, but La Parka reverses that with a cross arm-breaker. They trade shots with Sabu winning, but they choke each other to the outside. Sabu with the smash mouth to La Parka and Sabu sends him into the crowd. Sabu springboard plancha into the crowd on La Parka. They brawl out of the crowd and La Parka drops him face first onto the rail. Sabu gets thrown into a few fan and he LITERALLY wears the chair around his neck.

 

[Commercial Break]

 

Back with a table in the ring and Sabu with a somersault moonsault for two! Sabu places La Parka across the table with the chair. Cuban Assassin comes in but La Parka throws a chair in his face and gives him the worst taken chair shot ever, in which Sabu accidentally gives him the leg drop through the table (stupid) and La Parka connects with a top rope corkscrew moonsault for three at 7:57. *3/4 Match was Decent, but not as good as the previous one. How Sabu made that mistake is beyond me. The Series is tied at one as we come to an end.

 

Pretty good show with the Sabu and La Parka stuff, but the opening match was worthless, and does nothing for me. Until Next Time...

[Guest tpww7]

- Joey Styles informs us that Vampiro has left MLW. So we get C.M Punk challenging Raven to a rematch at Hybrid Hell, and Raven has accepted. C.M Punk cuts his usual promo about being the cleanest person. He says he will beat Raven, I say, he sucks.

Have you seen any CM Punk matches?

[Guest nWoScorpion]

I was being mean because I hate the 20 minutes of 3 minute promos in the middle of the show. His match versus Raven was good, but I woyldn't say I was really impressed.