AIW Slams & Jams! (6-13-03)

[Guest nWoScorpion]

- Being Friday the 13th, we're probably going to get some of the worst matches possible tonight. Call it...a hunch. Ba-doom che!

 

- ::Prays to God for something good, or above DUD ratings...and NO women matches God! They suck!:: Audio is already crapping out. Great.

 

- Eric Embry Vs. Gerry Young:

Oh ya, this is what I wanted...not! Stall to start and they lock-up. Eric Embry needs to hit the gym. Embry trips up young in a go behind. Winner gets a shot at Texas Heavyweight Title, but of course that doesn't matter since it won't be shown. More stalling. They trade armbars and Embry with a hard right. Knee lift by Young and he nails Embry on the back of the head, but walks into a clothesline. Young with a series of shots to the back of Embry's neck. Embry seems to have on Bob Rupp's tights. Embry is sent outside via a forearm.

 

[Commercial Break]

 

Back from break and Embry eats table. Boring Match a-go-go. Young takes Embry into the crowd and rams him into something. Embry slams Young's head into the table on the way back to the ring. Back inside and Young with a top rope axehandle followed by a leg drop. Embry sends Young into the turnbuckle but Young nails him to the canvas. Embry reverses a piledriver but he misses something. Young misses an elbow drop and Embry gets nailed with a vicious elbow. Embry ducks an elbow and we get the double clothesline. Embry pounds away on Young, but gets caught a running knee for two! This match is going way too long. Young misses a corner splash and hits the post, so Embry rolls him up for three at 11:25. DUD Way too much stalling and basically all punch, punch, kick match.

 

- Doug Gilbert & Dirty White Boy Vs. Jerry Lynn & Tony Michaels:

I have no way of recognizing anyone. Doug Gilbert I knew went on to be the Dark patriot for a while, and Jerry Lynn is independent god. Dr. Tom Prichard gets in Eric Embrys face. Prichard is the Texas Heavyweight Champion and Embry just won the contendership. Match is totally ignored for now. OK he's not the Texas Heavyweight Champion. He's just pissed that he's from Texas and Embry isn't. Michaels & The DWB in. Lynn comes in quick with an elbow to the forearm and applies an armbar. Slam by White Boy but he misses an elbow drop. Lynn with a cross body pres for two and a drop-kick to Doug Gilbert. Lynn looks awful in short tights. Doug Gilbert in and he hammers on Lynn. Lynn with a head scissors take over for two.

 

[Commercial Break]

 

Back and White Boy with a side slam on Michaels for two. Gilbert in and they nail a double back elbow and Gilbert drops a right hand for two. Gilbert with an awesome DDT on Michaels. Big clothesline by Gilbert and Michaels is sent into White Boys boot. Michaels avoids a corner charge but can't make the tag. Sunset flip by Michaels gets no count. Gilbert back in and Michaels with a small package for one. Gilbert comes back and applies a rear chin lock. White Boy chokes Michaels on the second rope while Embry and Prichard get into an argument. Gilbert gets caught with an awesome DDT by Michaels and Lynn gets the hot tag and he nails everyone with scoop slams. Double Drop-kick to Dirty White Boy as well as to Doug Gilbert for two. Someone nails Lynn from behind and White Boy covers for three at 11:38. 3/4* Match again sucked.

 

- We get footage of some ladies wrestling, one of the them is Steve Austin's old valet, the other I think is Chris Adam's. Chris Von Erich makes the save and beats up Percy Pringle III for some fun. Steve Austin comes in and he attacks Chris Von Erich. Big Powerslam by Austin. Now Austin & Pringle lay a shit kicking. Piledriver by Austin, and Chris Adams makes the save, chasing off the heels.

 

- Nikolai Volkoff Vs. Rick Reed:

Squash City! Knee to the midsection several times by Volkoff and he stomps a mudhole in his ass. The camera and audio sucks for this match. Volkoff whips Reed to the buckle several times. Volkoff boots him and nails a double under hook suplex and a fucked up clothesline to the back of the head for three at 1:47. DUD. Jesus Christ this show sucks this week.

 

- Miami Hurricane Vs. Eric Frasier:

Lockup and no one wins. Hurricane hammers away at Frasier. Frasier with a backdrop and a drop-kick sends Hurricane outside. Back inside and Hurricane with an armbar. Frasier hammers the Hurricane and we get more stalling. Side headlock by Frasier followed by a cross body press for two! Frasier works the arm with leg drops and goes back to the armbar.

 

[Commercial Break]

 

Back and more of the same. Hurricane ducks a clothesline and nails one of his own. Big scoop slam by Hurricane gets a two count. Frasier eats turnbuckle and we get some choking. Snapmare and headlock by Miami Hurricane. Frasier breaks free but gets caught with a knee lift. Drop-kick is avoided and Frasier with 10 punches of doom. I get distracted by an asshole so I miss some stuff. Face buster by Hurricane for two. Frasier with a school boy from nowhere for three at 11:31. 1/2* Awful.

 

- World Tag Team Championship Match:

The Fabulous Ones © Vs. Jerry Lawler & Jeff Jarrett:

JIP. Kiern chokes Lawler with his wrist band tape and applies a front headlock. Jarrett makes the hot tag and he hammers both Fabulous Ones. double Noggin Knocker and its a pier-six brawl. 10 punches sin the corner by Jarrett on Kiern. Lawler & Lane with a double shoulder block. Cornette accidentally powders Stan Lane while Kiern gets his ass kicked by Jarrett. Drop-kick sends Kiern into Lane and Lawler quickly coverts for three at 1:41. DUD. Eddie Gilbert from out of nowhere attacks and its a heel beat down on the new champions and Bill Dundee, courtesy of Hot Stuff. Gilbert with a piledriver to Lawler. Lawler is back up and he hammers away at Gilbert with hard rights, and they brawl into the crowd. Why not show the whole match instead of the shit ones from earlier. Fabulous Ones beat on Lawler, and Eddie Gilbert throws a fireball in his face.

 

- End of Show. TERRIBLE. That's all I have to say.