One and Only Raw Spoiler Thread

[Guest justcoz]

I realize that this should probably be posted in another folder but it was inspired by the writing Raw thread. That thread seems to have died by the time I finished this so I'm posting it here.

 

MADISON SQUARE GARDEN RAW

 

The show opens with a Booker T vs. Christian rematch for the IC Title. Booker lays out Christian at 6:27 and does the spinaroonie as Ross screams for Booker to pin him and bring the title home. Just as Booker goes to cover Christian - Teddy Long comes out from the back. Teddy calls Booker an embarassment to African Americans - let's entertain whitey by breakdancing in the ring instead of moving in for the kill and bringing home the gold. Teddy states that Booker doesn't back the mac and most of all doesn't represent the black - he's forgot his roots - Stevie Ray appears behind Booker and lays him out with an F5 like move. Teddy yells for Stevie to remove his belt and whip Booker just like their mama used to, Stevie obliges and whips Booker with the strap. Ross screams how can Booker's own brother do this and we cut to commercial...

 

Mean Gene is shown backstage with the mic receiving a warm response from the Garden crowd. Gene announces that his sources tell him that Eric Bischoff has an announcement which Gene believes will blow the roof off of Madison Square Garden tonight.

 

Steve Austin approaches Goldberg backstage. Austin asks Goldberg, "Who he is". Goldberg responds asking what the hell Austin is talking about. Austin states that it wasn't too long ago where he heard every Monday night - that bald guy on the other show, in WCW, is something special - watch out for him. A few years later Goldberg is in WWE and Austin just isn't all that impressed. He may have wins over The Rock and Y2J but just like Kane the monster is asleep. Austin tells Goldberg to calm down - just do something already - Austin then announces that tonight Goldberg is going to run a gauntlet - he fights 4 men one right after the other. Goldberg smiles. Cut to commercial.

 

Hurricane knocks on a dressing room door and RVD opens the door. The locker room is filled with smoke and Hurricane coughs. RVD asks him if he minds incense. Hurricane tells RVD that he's happy to be teaming with him tonight and that La Resistance do not deserve the tag team championships. It's up to two American superheroes to bring those titles back to the United States. RVD and The Hurricane (Hurricane does the superhero motion). RVD asks him if he's high. Hurricane states that he flies all the time - it's a superpower to be high, completely natural. RVD grins and says, "Dude, alright then, cool, I knew you had to be under the influence of something to dress like that, let's call ourselves a tag team." But they have to prove themselves first and Van Dam suggests they take out the number one contenders - The Dudley's - tonight...

 

Austin approaches Bischoff backstage and demands to know what his suprise is. Bischoff states he will reveal it at 10pm on Y2J's Highlight Reel.

 

Ric Flair/Randy Orton vs. HBK and Maven: Prior to the match Flair and Orton are interviewed by Mean Gene and Flair says that Maven impressed him last week - reminding him of a young Ricky Steamboat and anyone who knows the legacy of Ric Flair and his history with Ricky Steamboat - knows that is the sincerest compliment. Orton reminded Flair that Maven came from an MTV show. He wasn't a third generation superstar. Flair and Orton get the win when Maven makes the rookie like mistake of arguing with the ref allowing Orton and Flair to double team for the win.

 

Chris Jericho introduces Eric Bischoff. Jericho states that he has no love lost for Eric but Eric was kind enough to let Y2J in on his big announcement and thanks Bischoff for saving this for the Highlight Reel - Roddy Piper has nothing on Chris Jericho and Piper's Pit is yesterday's news after this bombshell. Jericho starts off by commending Bischoff for finding ways to consistently piss off Vince McMahon and tonight is no exception. Bischoff explains that Vince McMahon prohibts a certain talent from appearing on WWE programming but Eric Bischoff found a loophole in that clause - it reads this talent can't appear on Smackdown. He can however appear on RAW. Voodoo Child hits and here comes Hollywood Hogan!

 

Jericho welcomes Hogan to the Highlight Reel. The Hogan chant fills the Garden. Cut to commercial...

 

We come back and Eric Bischoff welcomes Hollywood to Raw. Bischoff asks if Hogan is really Mr. America? Hogan states he's Hollywood, brutha, black and white, no disrespect to those brave men and women who defend our country, but Hollywood doesn't need to sport red white and blue to show his support. Bischoff applauds and recalls the good times he and Hogan had years ago. Jericho sarcatically asks that Hogan and Bischoff not turn this into a love fest because those things used to take up all of his air time on Nitro and it's nobody is stealing his spotlight on the Highlight Reel. Hogan blows off Jericho and Bischoff and talks about all the great moments he's had with New York wrestling fans in Madison Square Garden. Right after Hogan relives Liberace, Billy Martin, Muhammad Ali, Mr. T and Wrestlemania 1, the signal goes dead. Cut to commercial.

 

Ross and JR apologize for the technical difficulties and show a video of Pat Patterson and Gerald Brisco ordering the crew moments ago to black out the program per the orders of Mr. McMahon. They also show both Bischoff and Hogan being escorted out of the building as NYC police had been ordered by Mr McMahon to do so.

 

Mick Foley is introduced. Foley plugs his book and states that it's great to be at Raw, on camera, right here in Madison Square Garden live from New York City. Foley then announces that he has made himself the referee for tonight's Dudley's vs. RVD/Hurricane match just because he loved refereeing the Hell In the Cell match at Bad Blood and he wanted that feeling one more time before he goes home.

 

During the match, Paul Heyman and Tommy Dreamer walk through the crowd at MSG. When they approach ringside, RVD high kicks Hurricane. Dreamer throws Foley into the steel post. Heyman applauds, grabs the mic and states, "Well, well, well, it ain't Philly but I'm In a New York State of Mind. Bubba Ray yells for Dvon to get the table. Dvon brings in the table and the Dudley's lay Hurricane on the table and call for RVD to frogsplash. Heyman joins JR and the King at the announce booth stating that the Hurricane gimmick has run it's course and it's time for an image makeover of sorts. The Dudley's remove the Hurri mask. RVD, Dreamer and The Dudleys strip Hurricane out of the Hurri outfit down to his trunks. Ross and Lawler wonder if Hurricane's unmasking is a sign of things to come tonight.

 

Foley is interviewed by Mean Gene backstage and states that he's very familiar with Paul Heyman and ECW. He knew that Heyman wouldn't let that concept die and that the ECW guys always remained tight in the WWE locker room.

 

Steve Austin interupts stating that for all the bumps and shots to the head Foley has taken over the years, it's a bit odd that one shove into the steel post kept him down that long. Austin suggests that Foley was behind orchestrating the Heyman/ECW idea and asks him to leave the show right now. Foley grabs his book, holds it to the camera, tells Austin to have a nice day and walks away calling for Paul E...

 

Bill Goldberg gauntlet. Goldberg is led to the ring by security just like WCW and Austin comes to the ramp and announces Goldberg's first opponent. Gillberg! Goldberg 1-0... Austin announces the 2nd opponent Rosie. Goldberg squahes Rosie, Goldberg 2-0. Rodney Mac is the third competitor and goes down quickly to Goldberg as JR and the King have a field day with Teddy Long who just sat down and put on his headset as Goldberg has just won the White Boy Challenge in less than a minute, Goldberg 3-0. Austin introduces Lance Storm as the 4th competitor and pulls out a pillow from a sack he brought with him. Storm and Goldberg are going at it and Austin yells for Goldberg to beat the boring son of a bitch and put Raw viewers out of their misery. He wants them to be awake for Kane-HHH. Storm throws a fireball at Goldberg as medics and security run to the ring. Storm is escorted out by police as Austin tends to Goldberg. Cut to commercial.

 

HHH vs. Kane sees Kevin Nash return as the new member of Evolution forcing Kane to lose and unmask to close the show with a still shot of Kane's face.

[Guest Choken One]

Dames...Go do your fucking job.