PROMO: The EGO has Landed

[Guest The Extreme Solution]

(Ok this is my first promo, so don't slate it too much)

 

 

“Fuck!!!…… Where’s that bloody light switch?!”

 

“How the fuck should I know? It’s pitch black down here!”

 

“It’s your basement you dozy prat!”

 

“That doesn’t mean I know exactly where everything is!”

 

“Of course you don’t, you don’t have MY GREATNESS!”

 

“Yeah Dean, so you keep telling me”

 

“Ahhhhhh there it is! Finally!”

 

*click*

 

Slowly the lights flicker up, illuminating two men standing at the bottom of a flight of wooden stairs and a cramped, dusty basement gym, filled almost to it entirety by a home built ring,. The first and taller of the two, clad in a plain black hooded top and sweat pants, his shorter and considerably louder ginger haired companion wearing similar sweat pants, but his torso covered by a t-shirt emblazoned with the script “I AM THE GREAT ONE, COMPARE YOUR LIVES TO MINE THEN KILL YOURSELVES”.

 

The Extreme One slowly pushes back the hood of his top, his eyes fixed slowly on the dusty ring in the centre of the basement, before turning his head to look at his companion.

 

“Are you sure you want to do this Dean? It’s been a while”

 

The ginger haired man nods.

 

“Of course, or has it escaped you piddly little mind that we were tag team partners for two years, and there isn’t a move you know that I can’t counter, besides I AM THE GREAT ONE”

 

Johnathan chuckles and shakes his head

 

“So you keep frequently reminding me”

 

“Oh by the way Clarkey, I’ve been watching your matches in the SJL and frankly you’re shit!! You’re predictable, slow, boring and you’re selling’s abysmal!!! And not to mention the 1001 other flaws I’ve seen in your technique recently” Dean grins as he vaults up onto the ring apron, flipping over the top rope into the ring.

 

 

“Geeeze Dean you really know how to make someone feel better, I needed that like I needed a hole in the head” The Extreme One mutters softly.

 

“Bah! You’re just jealous, you know I was the one with all the talent back in Japan and look where it landed me, stuck back here!” Dean continues, bouncing on the balls of his feet and rolling his shoulders.

 

“You say that like it’s a bad thing, you haven’t done too badly for yourself. A different girl on your arm every night can’t be that bad and you’ve been milking that leg injury for nearly a year. When are you going to get off your arse and wrestle again?” The Extreme One smiles as he rolls into the ring getting to his feet as the two men stand face to face.

 

“I’ll be back when I’m good and ready” Dean replies nonchalantly “Besides screwing those filthy rich insurance companies out of there ill gotten gains is far more fun, I work my own hours and I’m my own boss, which is not something I can say about you corporate monkey boy!!! And besides I can beat you despite having a dodgy leg and a years ring rust… not that I have ring rust, talent like mine never goes rusty!…… you on the other hand are a no talent hack who’s about as extreme as a dead fish, I mean please what’s with this Extreme Solution thing of yours it’s laughable”

 

The Extreme One shrugs and shakes his head “I don’t know it sounded like a good idea at the time”

 

“Yes well… we all know about your good ideas, it’s like that Scott Solomon guy said to you before he kicked your ass in that 3 way dance, what you need is ruthless aggression, and you have about as much of it as a 3 month old pizza!” Dean grins as he looks at his old friend “So I’ve decided in my infinite wisdom and out of the kindness of my heart, I’m going to impart on you some of my vast wrestling knowledge and save this mediocre career of your... But you know you’ll never be as good as me… it’s like I keep saying I AM the GREATEST wrestler who’s ever lived!”

 

“Whatever you say Dean” The Extreme One sighs as the two men begin to circle each other before quickly locking up in a collar and elbow tie up, pushing against each other as they battle for the advantage. Suddenly Dean pushes The Extreme One’s left away, grabbing Johnathan’s right arm and twisting it into an arm wringer.

 

“See, what did I tell you?! You can’t beat me!” Dean grins as he spins back behind Johnathan, flowing from the Arm Wringer into a hammerlock. Johnathan shakes his head, twisting to the side and ducking under Dean’s arm, reversing the hammerlock into one of his own. “You really shouldn’t speak so soon Dean, things aren’t always as simple as they look”

 

“But in your case they are Clarkey, simple and predictable are about the only things you do!” Quickly Dean brings his free arm up, catching The Extreme One square on the chin, causing him to break the hold and stagger back. Pressing his advantage Dean races towards the ropes, rebounding back to try and catch The Extreme One with a clothesline. Regaining his senses quickly, Johnathan ducks under his old friends arm as Dean continues moving, rebounding off the opposite rope and races back towards Johnathan.

 

As Dean races back towards him The Extreme One plants his feet, reaching out under Dean’s arm as he runs at him, trying to take Dean over with an arm drag only to find his attempt blocked by the self proclaimed GREAT ONE, who in return attempts an arm drag of his own, only to have Johnathan return the favour by blocking his arm drag attempt.

Suddenly Johnathan brings his elbow up into Dean’s jaw, wrapping his arm around Dean’s neck, hooking his leg in-front of dean’s and driving him face first into the mat with a Front Russian Leg Sweep.

 

Johnathan reaches down dragging Dean up to his feet rocking his friend with a series of stiff punches, including a vicious right cross the sends Dean staggering back holding his jaw as the force of the blow spins him around so he faces the opposite direction, with a smooth deliberate motion Johnathan steps forward behind Dean, lifting him up onto his shoulders into a Torture Rack position. As Dean struggles on The Extreme One shoulders a smiles plays across Johnathan’s lips “Let’s see who’s predictable now shall we?” Johnathan whispers as he spins Dean forward off his shoulders dropping to his knees as he drives the back of Dean’s head, neck and shoulders down hard onto the mat as he drops to his knees in the move he affectionately calls the Extreme Terror.

 

Johnathan gets to his feet looking down at Dean as he convulses on the mat and grins “I take it that’s the lesson over then? It’s a pity I was enjoying the workout.”

Slowly Johnathan climbs out of the ring, making his way towards the stairs calling back “Oh by the way Dean, will you turn the light’s off on your way out? Cheers amigo.”

[Guest Dace59]

I've already made my commects. I think it's great. Dean just rules from what I know about him.

[Guest Aecas]

Yes he does, you always know when Dean's coming because his arrogance fills the room 5 minutes before he gets there

[Guest chirs3]

“I AM THE GREAT ONE, COMPARE YOUR LIVES TO MINE THEN KILL YOURSELVES”.

 

I WANT THAT SHIRT!