Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 Cue: "I'M THE GREATEST!" The camera swings across a packed arena as Kevin Kelly and Ernest "The Cat" Miller come out from behind the curtain and stand on the stage as a ton of green pyro fires off around the AggressionTron and the stage and ramp. Ernest dances to the announce booth and the two take their seats as the music dies down and the crowd cheers! The shot switches to a closeup of the sound booth, where both men are settling in with their headsets. Kevin kelly looks from the camera to the AggressionTron, where the same image is being displayed. He grins and throws up his hands. KK WELCOME, FANS, to the first edition of the OAOAST'S NEW SHOW: OAOAST AGGRESSION! (Fans erupt in cheers) I'm your host Kevin Kelly, alongside DA CAT~! CAT You dayamn right, Kevin! Now looka' all these people! KK They are stoked and so are we! Let's get things started as we kick off OAOAST AGGRESSION, ONE DAY AWAY FROM THE GREAT ANGLE BASH! [Cut to a video detailing The Dark Poet and Edward Robins attacking Widow and kidnapping her from this past heldDOWN~!] [Cut to backstage, where the MACHO MAN~! is standing with SPIDERPOET!] MACHO OOOOH YEAH! DIG IT! MACHO MAN here with the OL' SPIDAH PO'! Those GUYZ took out your WOMAN, SPIDEY! SP (Looks at the mic that Macho holds up to him and then to Macho. He then snatches the mic and pushes Macho away) Let someone who can speak coherently handle this, Randy. (SP looks at the camera) I didn't come here for an interview, I didn't come here to wrestle. I came here hoping that I'd find you, Edward. Dark Poet? He'd have done what he did anyway, but you are responsible for helping him. You are responsible for whatever harm befalls her, as much as Dark Poet is. And I know him, know that he's going to stay hidden until he's good and ready to come out and do whatever he's planning. And I'll be waiting. I'll be there. But I don't have to wait for you, you selfish, obsessed bastard. I trust Zack Malibu. I trust him well. We've been through a couple of wars together, and I trust him in the ring. If I hadn't been under the influence of that sick son of a bitch, Stephen Joseph, I'd have seen Zack for the upstanding CHAMPION that he truly is. It's a pity that you can't see him for that, Edward. I do trust Zack Malibu. I trust him dearly. I trust him with my own life, and I trust him with Widow's. Your problem, Edward, is that you feel betrayed. Well whoop-de-friggin'-doo. You want to talk about betrayed? My own TWIN BROTHER has betrayed me, turned against me out of some sick need to set me on some righteous path. Sound familiar? Well to hell with him, and to hell with you too, Ed. You want to beat some sense into me? You get your chance. Tomorrow night at the GREAT ANGLE BASH! You and me, three matches, back to back. You think this is about me, Edward? You think it's about you? FUCK you. I could care less about the likes of a spoiled little rich boy who thinks a good and honest friend betrayed him because he couldn't get his way. I do care that the position of a Champion is held by you. The Tag Team Champions of the OAOAST cannot be devious, evil men like you and Stephen Joseph. I refuse to let that happen. You don't deserve ONE belt, let alone TWO. Tomorrow night, in Florida, I'm going to whip your ass in a wrestling match. And if I can't do it there, I'll do it betwixt barbed wire ropes. And eventually, I can feel it in my bones, Edward, we're going to wind up in that cell. You want purity through pain? Fine. Let's go to the most painful place imaginable. Hell . . . in the Cell. Bring your fightin' boots, Edward. I'm coming for the Tag Titles. I'm coming for myself. And I'm coming for Widow. Get ready. (Poet throws the Mic down and we cut to commercial) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 (Blurricane is sitting in his locker room when there is a knock at his door. Blurricane opens the door to find one of the backstage workers there with a note) WORKER I was told to give you this note. I have no idea who it's from. BLURRICANE Thank you good sir! (Blurricane opens the note and looks at it. He gets a strange look on his face and sets the note down. The Blurricane leaves the room and the camera pans down to show the note.) It reads: FATHER IS WAITING. IT IS TIME TO COME HOME. [Cut to the Announce Booth] CAT Man, this Blurricane stuff just gets mo' bizzarre. Kevin Kelly: Makes me wonder where it'll go at Great Angle Bash! Speaking of which, one of the matchups for this Sunday at the Great Angle Bash is now in jeopardy, courtesy of one of it's participants, the obnoxious Banky. Banky was practically forced to sign a match with Dangerous A by IZ Commissioner Dames. *footage of the contract signing on the 6/23/03 IZ is shown* Kevin Kelly: Then, as both men stared one another down, Banky would spew tobacco juice in the eyes of DA and have his 2 flunkies, Hector and Chainsaw, restrain Commissioner Dames from stopping what was to come. *footage of Banky release German Suplexing DA through a table* *fast forwards to Banky throwing DA's son Christopher over the top rope* Kevin Kelly: Just a despicable and cowardly act from the hack country music singer. Ernest Miller: What are you talking about, Kevin? I have both of Banky's CD's in my changer and trust me, his music gets the hoes. I know, oh boy do I know. Kevin Kelly: Whatever. But then he takes the assault to a whole other level. *footage of Banky giving DA a Banky Brainbuster from the apron to the floor* Kevin Kelly: Just a sickening display. The Great Angle Bash was supposed to showcase both men's in ring debut and now that debut is in question and lies on the health of DA. Dames said if DA can't go, Banky would be suspeneded indef... Ernest Miller: .... Hold the fort, Kevin! We've got Banky via telephone to talk to us and the OAOAST fans about what happened on IZ and about the ppv tommorrow! This is great. We are about to have some true star power on this show. Kevin Kelly: Umm... this is unexpected. Fans, apparantly we do have Banky live via telephone from his Ranch in Bakersfield, CA. Banky, are you there? Banky: Fuckin A, Kevin Kelly, how the hell are you? Kevin Kelly: Uhh, Banky, this is syndicated TV, you aren't supposed to cuss any... Banky: ...what the f*** (*=bleep) do you think censors are for? Who the hell cares about my language anyhow. Did you see me take that bitch of a man, Dangerous A out? Did you see me dump him right on his noggin? Kevin Kelly: Yes I did, unfortunately. Did you heed Dames warning that if DA can't go, you'll be suspended indefinitely? Banky: Like I give a shit. I don't need money from this. I am a country music recording STAR!!! Key word there Kevin: STAR! I have plenty of money to burn. I am in this because as a youngin', I really liked the ass kicking I saw. You see, I can kick ass as well. It just so happens that I can sing my face off as well. Ernest Miller: It just so happens that Kevin Kelly has a doctor's report on DA's condition. Why are you holding out info from Banky and myself? Banky: You know DA's medical condition? Cough up the goods Kevin. Did I break his neck or what? Kevin: Unfortunately for you, no. You did not break DA's neck. His doctor said that if it wasn't for the special training DA learned from years of wrestling and training in the dangerous puro head dropping style, he would be out. As it stands right now, DA just has a stiff neck and WILL compete this Sunday at the Great Angle Bash!!! Banky: DAMMIT!!! F***!!!! F***!!!F***!!! This is crap!! Ernest Miller: You got the man all heated up now, Kevin! Banky: That's alright. That's fine. I guess my fans will see what I can do in the ring. You, DA. You will finally get to see what I can do in the ring. You and Dames keep saying that I've been ducking you for the last 2 weeks. Nope. Farthest thing from it. You see, you forgot that I'm a multimillionaire. I have access to shit. Hell, I even got on the grounds at your house. These last 2 weeks I've been watching tape of you. All the tapes of you. I got a hold of a puro dealer and he hooked me up. Now I know every little nook and cranny about you, DA. But you wanna know something. After watching tape after tape of you and watching you evolve into a great wrestler, one thing stuck out in my mind and that was this. YOU ARE STILL A LITTLE BITCH! That's right. I see the bitchisms in your walk. In your talk. You are nothing but a half Jap, half white little bitch. That's why you didn't want to train me back when I was in Japan years ago. Because you knew I had potential to be as huge a wrestling star than I am a country music star and it ate you up inside. It kills you that I could be bigger than you. And it kills you to this day that I am bigger than you. That's what makes you a bitch, DA. Bitches get jealous when other people do better than they do. Don't think I don't know what your all about. I know. Kevin, I ask you a question, do you know what DA is known as in Japan? Kevin Kelly: I always thought he was known as just Dangerous A. Banky: What about you, Cat? Ernest Miller: Oh, you know I don't watch that Japanese stuff. They speakin Chinese or somethin ain't they? Banky: Uh, right Cat? Anyways, he's known as the Scourge of the Orient. That's a hell of a name. Japanese don't hook you up with a name like that unless you're a mean sumbitch. Well, after watching DA operate, I can safely say that he is faking you all. He comes out here like he's all about his family.... Kevin Kelly: But you are the one who involved his family. You kidnapped his son and brought him out when you both debuted last month at School's Out. You intruded on DA's property and got your ass handed to you... Banky: ...just shut your trap, Kevin! Shut it, right f***in now!! My point was that he comes off like he's a family man, but this man is about pain. The reason he came here to the OAOAST is because the Japanese don't like or respect him. It's not becaue he isn't a good wrestler. On the contrary, he's a great wrestler. He has to be or else I wouldn't have asked him to train me. But see, they, the Japanese wrestling fans don't full on respect him because he's only half Japanese. So instead of making bank in Main Events, the promotors hold him back to upper midcard. So he's bitter and he takes it out on his opponents. Then what's he do? He decides to debut on the exact same f***ing day as the one and only Banky? What the hell are you thinking? You thinking of upstaging me, boy? That what you were thinking? Well, after I showed your boy to you, changed your f***ing complexion on life, didn't it? Well, this Sunday, I'm gonna change the complexion of this industry. And I'm gonna start with this bitter little bitch, Dangerous A. Kevin, you've officially pissed me off and this interview is done. A star like myself has committments, you know. Cat, good hearing from you. Ernest Miller: Aw, shucks man. When is your next album coming out? Banky:I've been working on it in the studio for the last month. Cat, how bout you and me record a track or two together. I think we could make a lot of money? Ernest Miller: You think? I'd love to.... Kevin Kelly: ...thank you for talking, Banky. We've got more show to do. (cuts off Banky) Ernest Miller: You just cut off an artist. An artist that was offering me some money and a chance to let my voice talents shine. You messing with my money, Kevin. Kevin Kelly: Well, on Sunday June 29th,2003 at the Great Angle Bash (graphic still photo of Banky and DA with ppv theme music in the background) 2 men will finally have a long awaited in ring debut and something tells me they won't be messing around, Cat. Ernest Miller: No they won't. Banky is upset because of the past actions of DA and DA is upset because of Banky's actions from the past month. Kevin Kelly: It gets set to explode between these 2 at the Great Angle Bash! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 As the commercials end, the camera pans around the arena catching fans acting like complete morons. A bit of pyro goes off and the camera shoots over to The Cat and Kevin Kelly at the announce table. The arena suddenly goes dark and a small video package begins to play…detailing the Tag Scramble at Great Angle Bash, causing the crowd to turn all their attention to the AngleTron and forget their bathroom breaks…. ** “Tomorrow’s Light” by From Zero fades up behind scenes of Roman gods strolling through streets of stone as followers look on in sheer amazement** One thing stands between the peons and the rulers… **Scenes of each team standing tall in the ring…Featured Attraction….IOU….and Toy Machine…arms raised in victory…all spliced in between more shots of gods in a state of praise and….** POWER… **Shots of various matches air…with scenes including Zero’s big boot to The Parka, Jay Darring’s DDT, The Amazing Rando holding the X title high, the Featured Attraction Dream Sequence, and various shots of IOU fighting vampires and ninjas…finishing with a shot of two gods standing on a pedestal looking out over a crowd before turning to a shot from the crowd looking up as another god joins the two…** One team has the power… **Shots of the Trinity together holding the OAOAST Tag Team Titles…lightning flashes, burning the image of the Trinity over the image of the gods** This Sunday…three teams will fight for the chance to go for the gold against The Trinity……who will it be… **More shots of the three teams…finishing with quick flashes of all six men as the music fades out…** One team has the power…three teams wish to harness it…Great Angle Bash…see what lies ahead… **The onlookers leave the three men, who drop their heads as lightning flashes behind them once more** ::::”Come Out And Play” by the Offspring cues the entrance of Sonic Youth…as the lights go out and spotlights illuminate the entranceway. Kevin: Sonic Youth looks ready for this upcoming match, Cat… Cat: Of course he does…he’s the “Icon” for a reason, ya know… The crowd grows close to restless as Youth walks with a purpose to the ring and slides underneath the bottom rope. Another spotlight falls on the body of Youth as he climbs to the second turnbuckle, posing crucifix-style as the lights return to normal and the crowd explodes for the “Icon”…:::: Kevin: And here comes his challenger…the former X Champion…. ::::The arrival of The Amazing Rando is made clear as “Kerosene” by Brother Cane begins to play, showing off the jukebox entrance style of Rando. Cat: This guy changes theme songs so much he’ll never get on OAOAST: The Music! Kevin: Maybe you can have his spot, Cat… Cat: Good idea, Kelly…I hope management heard you… Kevin: I’m Kevin Kelly….management never hears me… Cat: You’ve got a point The lights strobe through the guitar solo and spotlights cascade over the crowd as The Amazing Rando makes his way to the ring, slapping some hands of his fans before climbing up the ringsteps and to the top rope, posing quickly as he springboards from the top to the ropes and off with a moonsault, landing on his feet and finishing with a Kurt Angle-like spin and falling to his knees in pose as four spotlights converge to one around The Amazing Rando, which he stays in pose until the lighting returns to normal:::: Kevin: These two look ready to fight, Cat……and this looks like it’s going to be quite the precursor to the Tag Scramble tomorrow night at Great Angle Bash! Cat: Yes…Great Angle Bash! Last year’s show was great! My seats were fantastic… Kevin: You didn’t go to the show… Cat: I know…but my couch was really comfortable that day… Kevin: Oh brother…well the ref is signaling for the start of this match… **DING DING** Sonic and Rando look out to the crowd for a moment, as the fans show appreciation to the men in the ring. Rando begins to clap his hands and the crowd follows suit. Sonic shakes his head in wonder. Rando walks up to Sonic and offers a handshake and Sonic accepts before the ref rings the bell and signals for the match to start. Rando and Sonic go into a tieup, which Sonic takes a slight advantage from and pushes hard, causing Rando to slide back into the corner. Rando looks surprised but only smiles before taking a run in at Youth, leapfrogging over him and going to the corner to springboard off the second turnbuckle with a cross body splash just as Youth turns around. Both men are down and Rando goes for a cover… 1…and Youth kicks out easily … …but Rando is back up with a quick set of hard kicks keeping Sonic down. Rando runs over Youth, putting a foot to his back as he bounces off the ropes and goes airborn, hitting a standing Shooting Star Press to the back of Sonic. Cat: Rando just loves to go high risk with those shooting stars……. Kevin: But they can pay off…Sonic may have gotten the wind knocked out of them there… Another cover… 1… 2..Another kickout from Sonic…..Rando lifts him up quickly and tries for a whip into the ropes, but Sonic reverses and Rando hits the ropes and comes off looking for a takedown but Sonic easily dodges and puts Rando into a drop toe hold. Rando hits the mat hard, and comes up holding his face...letting Sonic come from behind and shove him into the corner. Youth goes for a roll up… 1…Fast Kickout from The Amazing Rando! Sonic is back on the attack once more, putting the boots to Rando’s ribs and lower back. Rando can do nothing but take the punishment, but tries to roll out of the ring. Sonic uses slides to the side of Rando and connects with a vicious kick right as Rando hits the floor. A snapmare puts Rando down and Youth takes a few steps away and runs in and hits a beautiful neckwhip, causing Rando’s head to whiplash forward and then backwards hard, with his head bouncing off the floor. Kevin: That can cause some serious injury, Cat! Rando rolls around in pain again holding his head as Sonic climbs back into the ring and back out once more to break the ref’s count. Youth pulls Rando off the mat and whips him hard into the barricade, causing a small whimper of pain. Sonic rolls back into the ring once more as Rando steps away from the barricade but is met by a flying Youth as he comes from inside the ring with a beautiful Somersault Plancha! Cat: Sonic goes super! Kevin: Super Sonic? Is he from Seattle or …. Cat: SEGA~! Kevin: Ooooooooookaaaaayyyyyy… Both men are down as the ref starts his count once more, though Sonic is a bit quicker to his feet, grabbing Rando by the head and tossing him into the ring. Youth climbs to the top rope as Rando stands up in the ring, still dazed from the plancha. Rando turns and is caught by Youth coming off the top with a hurricanrana…and a pin… 1… 2….Kickout once more for Rando! Sonic rolls off and is up fast, but just as he turns back around Rando kips up and hits Sonic with a leg lariat that puts him on his back, but Rando falls as well and can not capitalize. Cat: Is could end right here, Kevin! Kevin: Well that would be anti-climactic, now wouldn’t it? The ref begins another count… 1…2…. Both men are slowly crawling up, with Rando heading for one corner and Youth heading for an adjacent one. 3…4…5… Rando has reached the second rope…and Youth is up. Rando pulls himself up to his feet and turns around just in time to be caught in a HUGE splash. Sonic pulls back and Rando steps out and once again falls on his face. Kevin: Rando looks out cold! Cat: Colder than the beer I keep under this desk, Kevin! Kevin: Did you say beer? Cat: *chugs* ……. Youth sees his chance, jumping over Rando and going to the top, coming off with a moonsault to the lower back of Rando. Rando rolls onto his stomach in pain, giving Sonic a chance to go for a pin… 1… 2.......NO! Rando is able to kick out once more! Cat: That crazy boy just won’t go down! Kevin: He’s amazing! The crowd is getting into it now, as all the signs have come down and their attention has turned to the action in the ring. Sonic does not give up, hitting an elbow drop again to the lower back, then another…and Another! Rando is in pain! Sonic rolls out of the ring and pulls Rando to the corner. Youth waves his arms in the air and wraps Rando’s legs around the ringpost and locks in a Figure Four around the post! Kevin: Figure Four! Figure Four! Cat: Look at the pain in Rando’s eyes! Rando is screaming in pain before the ref can even get out of the ring to break up the hold. Kevin: He could break his legs! After a moment Sonic relents, and Rando is released, rolling up and holding his knee in pain. Youth grabs the leg and slams it into the post for a bit more pain, which Rando tries to block but is helpless against it. Youth rolls back in the ring and walks to the corner, standing on the second rope and throwing up his hands for the crowd as Rando is still laying in the corner, holding his right leg. Cat: Rando is in serious pain… Kevin: It looks like Sonic Youth might be looking to finish Rando off here… Sonic comes across the ring and pulls Rando out to the center of the ring by his arms and signals for the Twilight…walking over his body and making sure to stomp Rando’s stomach as he goes for the legs. He grabs the legs and splits them before dropping his head below the belt. Rando whimpers once more and tries to squirm out of Youth’s grip but it is useless as his leg is in too much pain and he is able to turn Rando over for the Twilight. The ref stands in front of Rando and checks for submission, but Rando will not give up… Cat: He quit! I heard him quit! Kevin: Shut up, Cat… Suddenly the lights go out…and the crowd can be heard murmuring in the darkness. When the lights come back on the ref and Sonic Youth are both down and The Amazing Zero is standing over both of them. Zero kicks the ref out of the ring before turning his attention to Youth. He lifts Youth up to his feet and whips him into the ropes before dropping him down again with a big boot. Rando rolls out of the ring and to the floor clutching his leg as Zero signals for the Schoolboy Buster. Kevin: Sonic Youth might be on his way to SCHOOL! Zero lifts Youth up once more and gets him in the air, but JAY DARRING has appeared on the apron and springboards off with a dropkick to the face of Zero, causing Youth to fall and splash Zero on his way down. Darring stands up and throws his arms in the air, causing a huge roar to explode from the crowd. Youth is holding his head in pain but Darring screams at him to set Zero up for the Dream Sequence……… Cat: Featured Attraction are going for the Dream Sequence, Kevin! Kevin: They’ve never missed…..NEVER! ……………And it is FLAWLESS~! The crowd begins a HUGE “F-A” chant with Zero down and hurting. Darring and Youth raise their hands in victory, but are amazed when “Little Crazy” by Fight begins to play in the arena and IOU come running out…CARRYING A TABLE~! Kevin: It’s IOU~! What are THEY doing here!? Cat: It looks like they want to get some wood with those Damn FAers! IOU drop the table and slide in the ring, but are met by Featured Attraction, who begin to wear them down with kicks and stomps, not letting them up. Sonic lifts up K-Ness and goes for an irish whip, but K reverses and hits a dropkick that knocks Sonic flat as Jobsquad escapes from the grasp of Jay and IOU hit double elbow drops on Sonic. Jay lifts K-Ness up and tosses him to the outside, where Rando is finally to his feet. Rando climbs up onto the barricade and throws up his arms, summoning all his leg strength to come off the barricade with a SHOOTING STAR PRESS~! K-Ness looks to be out but Rando makes sure, lifting K-Ness up and holding him in position with a front facelock before dropping him down with a quick snap DDT. Jobsquad’s luck is even worse, as Jay has lifted him up to the top and has hooked the arms. Kevin: Jay could be setting Jobsquad up for the same move he used to take out Vitamin X last week! Cat: THE DDT~! That is one painful maneuver! And what is Sonic doing? Kevin: Could they be looking for a SPIKE DDT~!? Youth comes from behind Jobsquad and holds up his legs as Jay jumps over the top rope and drops Job’s head to the turnbuckle HARD, with Sonic helping by putting THE SPIKE~! onto THE DDT~!. Cat: There it is! Kevin: Jobsquad could be DEAD~! Sonic and Jay throw high fives, but Sonic sees Rando standing up on the outside. Rando and Youth lock eyes, with Rando motioning for him to “just bring it” as Sonic runs and slides out of the ring, hitting the floor and starting to throw punches. Cat: Rando is back up and it looks like he isn’t taking any more crap! Rando seems too busy with Youth to notice Darring coming up from behind and grabbing his arms, shouting at Sonic to take a free shot, but before Sonic can make a move, Zero is up and spins Youth around and takes him down with a devastating clothesline…causing Darring to let go of Rando and take the same fate with another clothesline…as now Rando and Zero are the only ones standing. Kevin: Toy Machine are standing strong now... Cat: What’s going to happen now!? Kevin: What is Rando looking at? Rando looks over and notices the table that IOU had brought out to the ring. He smiles and runs over to it, lifting it up and setting it up on the outside. Zero goes for Jay but is attacked by a recovering K-Ness, who tries to jump on Zero’s back and take him down with a sleeper. Zero, however, simply reaches over his back and pulls K-Ness up and over his back and drops him back-first onto the barricade, causing K to fall into the crowd. Kevin: Ouch. That is some kind of pain. Cat: …damn. Zero then lifts up Darring and drags him over to the now setup table, but not before lifting him up and dropping his upperbody across the barricade to make sure he stays down and laying him across the table before noticing Jobsquad unconscious near the ring apron. Kevin: It seems Toy Machine is setting up for something… Cat: And what is Zero going to do with Jobsquad, now? Zero reaches for Job and rolls him out of the ring before picking him up and laying him on top of Darring. Rando jumps on top of the barricade and starts to take a run for the table but Youth is up once more, comeing off the ring steps and dropkicking Zero down onto the table just as Rando comes off the barricade with ANOTHER SHOOTING STAR PRESS~! that puts all four men down as he lands on Zero, Jay, and Jobsquad… Kevin: DEAR GOD! Cat: I’ve….holy….I….god……Wow! Kevin: Get some medical attention out here now! Only Sonic Youth standing as K-Ness is still out from the slam he took onto the top of the barricade. The crowd is NUCLEAR~! as Sonic Youth looks confused as to what to do next… **”Come Out And Play” blares once more and Sonic sees an opportunity to get out of Dodge, pulling Jay from the table wreckage and helping him to the back, leaving officials to clean up after the brawl that just occurred** ::::The crowd is still hyped after the display of teamwork and insanity that these teams will go through just to win at Great Angle Bash…and as the show goes to commercial, replays are shown of the entire contest, including entrances from all those involved and many other highlights including Sonic’s almost near destruction of The Amazing Rando, the fates of IOU, and the final Shooting Star Press that put everyone but Sonic Youth down and out:::: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 JOSH MATTHEWS: I'm backstage with the current OAOAST North American Champion "Shooter" Jay Darring. Shooter, I understand you have something big planned for tonight. JAY: You understand correctly Josh Matthews. You see, this is the debut episode of the hottest new weekend series on television, OAOAST Aggression, and what series premiere is complete without the prime time player himself, the iron man of IntenseZone, Jay Darring? But don't think I'm just here to mug for the camera and show off my shiny belt Josh, oh no, I want to start off Aggression with a BANG. You see, ever since School's Out, I've been rather disappointed with my colleagues on IntenseZone. Everyone is so wrapped up in their own petty personal vendettas that they lack the foresight to put their name up in lights and try to take this belt away from me. This fantastic new show, Aggression, features both brands, and thus opens up a brand new talent pool for me to showcase my skills against. So tonight, Joshy baby, I'm challenging anyone on HeldDown, to see if they can match up with THE BEST IntenseZone has to offer, and defend the honor of that second-rate brand. Not only that, I'm SO confident in my superiority that I'm sweetening the pot by putting the OAOAST North American title, the top prize on IntenseZone, on the line. So come one come all, if you've got the balls, HeldDown jabronis, and try, that's the key word, try, to take this belt off my shoulder. Crystal appears from off-camera, and snatches the microphone from Jay! CRYSTAL: Well Jay, I may not have balls, so to speak, but I know I have more than enough talent to beat you any day of the week, and tonight seems as good as any, so I accept your challenge. JAY: Ah Crystal, I was hoping it would be you, I've been very impressed with your recent work, and I've been waiting to get my hands on you, er, um, I mean take you out-I mean match up against you, um, I mean- CRYSTAL: Aw, how sweet, you're flustered. You better not get flustered in that ring tonight, or I will, key word WILL, be going home with that pretty little title of yours. Crystal pats the belt on Jay's shoulder and walks off. JOSH: Well, there you have it folks, what huge news! In an interpromotional contest, the North American title will be on the line as Crystal takes on the champion Jay Darring- THE LIGHTS GO OUT! JOSH: What the hell? When the lights come back on, AMAZING ZERO is standing right behind Jay! Zero spins the shocked champion around! ZERO: Hey champ, how about we make that match tonight a Three Way Dance? Jay, too stunned to speak at the sight of the massive Zero, simply nods. ZERO: Good. Zero walks off. JOSH: Well, Jay it looks like you've got your work cut out for you tonight! JAY: Yeah...I've gotta go get ready. [Cut to a cooridoor backstage] (Blurricane is walking backstage looking confused by the letter. As he walks a man in a hooded sweatshirt bumps into him. You cannot see the man's face.) BLURRICANE Excuse me sir. My mind is elsewhere. MAN You don't belong here. BLURRICANE What?? MAN You don't belong. You're not what you think you are. (The man turns and walks away leaving the Blurricane even more confused.) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 (Blurricane is standing backstage with Josh Matthews) JOSH I'm here with the Blurricane! Blurricane tomorrow night you take on both Reject and Orion for the F13 title, but how are you feeling with this mystery stalker following you? BLURRICANE Well Citizen Josh I'm not going to worry about it because I'm sure this mystery stalker is nothing more than lowly henchman. There's no way he's a full out villain...he hasn't done anything big yet. JOSH What about the cryptic messages and notes you've received? BLURRICANE It's obviously a game. Maybe I can use my super secret decoder ring to find the hidden message. JOSH Wow you have a decoder ring?? That's so cool I had one when I was a kid...I'm sorry I was rambling. So do you have anything to say to your opponents? BLURRICANE Get ready, take your vitamins, and drink your milk cause I'm taking that F13 title. (He gives the Hokey Thumbs Up and swooshes away) [Cue: Glass Tables Hype!] (A light guitar intro begins Battery by Metallica) VOICEOVER Hell...a place of eternal torment and pain. On Sunday four men will step into hell. A hell made of glass. Two men looking to finally rid themselves of a thorn in their side against two men looking to make an example out of someone. Lashing out the action, returning the reaction Weak are ripped and torn away Calvin attacks PK from behind with a 2x4 and wins back the 24/7 title. Hypnotizing power, crushing all that cower Battery is here to stay Parka and Eddy find the El Camino covered in stickers Smashing through the boundaries Lunacy has found me Cannot stop the battery Scenes from the Wal-Mart brawl are shown Pounding out aggression Turns into obsession Cannot kill the battery Totally Endorsed throw the Dream Machines through the window Cannot kill the family Battery is found in me! Battery! Scenes from the School's Out match are shown Crushing all deceivers, mashing non-believers Never ending potency Calvin smashes glass over Parka's head and laughs Hungry violence seeker, feeding off the weaker Breeding on insanity Parka challenges TE to a Glass Table Match~! Smashing through the boundaries Lunacy has found me Cannot stop the battery Parka picks up the La Parka mask from the box and smiles Pounding out aggression Turns into obsession Cannot kill the battery Scenes from the TE Gauntlet are shown Cannot kill the family Battery is found in me! Battery! PK is shown spray painting Calvin's name on the glass table As the song comes to a close we go back and forth between close up shots of each participant in the Glass Table Match. VOICEOVER This Sunday no one will be the same! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 Josh Matthews is walking down the corridor, when all of a sudden he's slammed into a door! BROCK AUSSTIN: I heard that IntenseZone punk put his title on the line. I...WANT...IN. WHERE DO I FIND HIM? JOSH: (GASPING FOR AIR, EYES BUGGING OUT) Sorry...Brock...too late...match is....next. Zero...and (cough) Crystal... BROCK: CRYSTAL!!!??? The enraged undefeated monster punches the wall, SMASHING a hole straight through it! He stalks off, leaving a wounded Josh wheezing on the floor. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 28, 2003 (*"I'm Just a Girl" by No Doubt fires up through the arena!*) Kevin Kelly: It's time for the first ever main event on OAOAST Aggression, and what a high stakes contest it is! The Cat: If Crystal or Zero take this match, HeldDown gets bragging rights foreva! Jay bit off more than he can chew! Ring Announcer: The following contest is a three way dance, scheduled for one fall, and is for the OAOAST NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first, from Coquitlam, British Columbia, Canada, weighing in at 128 pounds, CRYSTAL! Crystal high-fives the fans as she makes her way to the ring, and springs over the ropes, awaiting her first opponent! THE LIGHTS GO OUT, and a split second later, AMAZING ZERO is in the ring! RA: And from Everywhere, weighing in at 300 pounds, THE AMAZING ZERO! Kelly: One half of the hottest new tag team on HeldDown, Toy Machine, he gets his shot at the number one contendership to the tag titles, this Sunday in the scramble match at Great Angle Bash! (*Cue up "Cloud Connected" by In Flames*) RA: And finally, from Boston Massachusetts, weighing in at 173 pounds, he is the OAOAST North American champion, "SHOOTER" JAY DARRING! Kevin Kelly: The champion with nothing to gain, everything to lose! Cat: Stupid kid, he's gotta defend that title tomorrow night too! And he's got to defend on IntenseZone if he wins there- three defenses in three days, that's crazy! All three competitors shake hands before the bell in a sign of respect. DING DING DING! Zero and Darring stare each other down, talking trash. Crystal tries to interject, but she gets shoved away! Zero and Jay continue to get in each other's face, and as Crystal gets up, she gets shoved away again! Cat: The champ and Zero showin' no respect to Crystal! Zero strike the first blow with a hard chop to Jay's chest! Jay responds with a hard chop of his own, but Zero is unfazed. He tries for a clothesline, ducked by Jay- SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK TO BOTH MEN BY CRYSTAL! Kelly: Incredible strategic move by Crystal, dropping both competitors with one strike as they were preoccupied! Cat: Crystal may be a fine piece o'ass, but she's also a smart piece o'ass! Crystal goes to work on Jay-Jay catches her foot on a kick- enziguiri by Crystal! Jay drops to all fours as Zero is back on his feet- Crystal springs off Jay's back, and CATCHES ZERO WITH A HURRICANRANA! Kelly: Crystal starting off hot in this contest! Cat: Starting off, she is! Kelly: Geez Ernest, you're worse than Coach. Jay is quickly back to his feet, tries for the go-behind, Crystal reverses-german suplex, Jay lands on his feet. Foreshadow-blocked, diamond cutter by Crystal-blocked. Jay looking for a Downward Spiral- ZERO CLOTHESLINES BOTH OF THEM! Crystal goes down STO-style and Jay lands right on his face! Kelly: Don't count the big man out! He weighs more than both of the other competitors combined combined! Cat: By over 100 pounds! He's one big dude. Amazing Zero picks up Jay in a military press! He presses him over his head 1, 2, 3 times! And DROPS HIM RIGHT ON CRYSTAL! The other two members of the match are both clutching their chests, and roll to the outside! Kevin Kelly: It looks like Zero's size advantage will give him the decisive edge in this match, and bring IZ's gold to HeldDown! And he's not done! Zero is eyeing both competitors on the outside, he runs off the ropes- FAT GUY OUTTA CONTROL SUICIDE DIVE! Kelly: OH MY LORD, he FLATTENED them! Cat: Betta scrape them off the floor and cover! Zero rolls Crystal back in, cover! 1 2 KICKOUT! Kelly: Crystal basically kicked out on instinct on that one. What resiliency by this young woman! Cat: Hang on Kelly, if Zero got the pin there, would he have gotten the belt? Kelly: I think so yes. Cat: Jay is an idiot for agreeing to a match like that, losing his belt and disgracing IZ without even getting pinned! Kelly: The stakes are enormous no doubt, the champ better get his head together, he hasn't even gotten in an offensive move yet! Zero goes for another press slam on Crystal, he has her up-he gets CLOCKED with the STIFF~! Superkick by Jay! Crystal falls on top... 1 2 Jay knocks her off! Jay picks up Crystal, whips her in, leaprfrog by Jay, on the rebound he catches her in an armdrag, Crystal recovers and throws a Japanese armdrag on Jay- DOUBLE KIPUP! Kelly: Very impressive display of athleticism by both wrestlers. But Zero is back up! Zero charges in for a clothesline, Jay somehow sees him and ducks- and Zero walks right into a spinning heel kick by Crystal! Jay and Crystal are setting up the big man, pick him up- SIMULTANEOUS SPINNING HEEL KICK BY CRYSTAL, AND LEGSWEEP BY JAY! Kelly: That's Total Elimination, haven't seen that move in years! Cat: In perfect sync too! Neither are done, as Jay bounces off the ropes for a running senton splash, and Crystal with a standing moonsault! Crystal covers Zero! 1 2 Jay kicks her off! Kelly: Jay has go to stay on his toes in this one, or he'll never be able to show his face in the IntenseZone locker room again! Jay pounces right on Crystal- boot to the stomach, double underhook, into a backbreaker position... Kelly: Canadian backbreaker on the Canadian? Drops her down Canadian backbreaker-style! Cat: He calls that the Colt 45 fool! Cover off the Colt 45! 1! 2! 2.99! KICKOUT! Kelly: Oh so close! Jay, starting to look frustrated, whips Crystal into the turnbuckle. Jay charges, met with a boot to the face. Crystal springs up to the top, looking for a moonsault press- JAY SHOVES HER OFF, CRYSTAL LANDS WITH A HARD THUD ON THE OUTSIDE! Cat: Probably the first time the kid's touched a female ass his entire life, Kelly: Will you be serious, Crystal might be seriously hurt! Jay turns around, and gets snatched up by Zero! RUNNING POWERSLAM INTO THE CORNER! Kelly: THE HULK OF HELDDOWN HAS AWAKENED! Zero is moving in for the kill, SCHOOLBOY BUSTER-NO! Jay slips out! Jay grabs his head and neck- CRAVATE SUPLEX! Cat: How many suplex variations does this guy have? Kelly: He's studied wrestling styles from all over the world. Here's a cover! 1 2 KICKOUT! Cat: It'll take more than that to put Zero down! Jay is signalling for the Afterthought! He picks Zero up- AFTERTHOUGHT-NO! REVERSED! Zero quickly grabs him! HIGH ELEVATION SCHOOLBOY BUSTER! Kelly: THAT'S IT! THAT'S IT! THE NORTH AMERICAN TITLE IS COMING TO HELDDOWN! 1! 2! 3! HE GOT HIM! Kelly: ZERO DID IT! HE TAKES INTENSEZONE'S TITLE! Wait a second, as Zero celebrates, the ref sees Jay had his hand on the ropes! He orders the match to restart and Zero is furious! He picks up the prone Jay, whips him into the ropes, Jay somehow has the strength to try for a bodyscissors, Zero holds on to him. Crystal is back in the ring! He grabs Jay's head that's stuck in mid-air, and ZERO AND CRYSTAL DROP HIM DOWN WITH A SPIKE DDT! Cat: That's gotta be it. Jay is dead dead dead. Crystal covers! 1 2 Zero shoves her off! He covers! 1 2 Crystal kicks him off! Kelly: Both competitors fighting for the fall, both want to be the one to be the conquering hero on the next HeldDown! Zero, very pissed after his almost-win, just GRABS Crystal, tucks her head between his legs, STIFF POWERBOMB, RIGHT ON HER HEAD! Cat: SWEET LORD, THAT HURTS! Zero isn't done either, he picks up the dazed and confused Crystal again, and carries her on his shoulders as he climbs to the top rope! Kelly: Uh oh, this looks like it's going to be deadly! He's got her in a powerbomb position- SUPERBOMB OFF THE TOP! REVERSED INTO A MID-AIR HURRICANRANA BY CRYSTAL, ZERO CRASHES TO THE MAT! Kelly: WHAT QUICK THINKING, WHAT ATHLETICISM BY CRYSTAL! Crystal, though still woozy, has the presence of mind to try and lock in the CRYSTALLING on the stunned Zero! She's almost got him over- CRYSTALLING CLAMPED ON TIGHT! Kelly: I can't believe the strength by this young woman, she wants this title bad, she can taste it! The crowd is YELLING "TAP TAP TAP!" Jay isn't moving, no one to save Zero! Hang on, Crystal released the hold? Kelly: Why did she do that. Cat: I see why, look over there. "Good Ol'ECDub" Jim Heyross has approached the ring, carrying a suitcase. He's opened the suitcase, finds what he wants, and starts pulling it out and holding it up for the crowd to see- sports bras, sheer see-through eveningwear, silky thong and bikini underwear... Kelly: Unless Heyross has a really odd personal life, that's Crystal's travel bag. Cat: Well, I've heard the stories...but yeah, it's gotta be Crystal's. Girl looks PISSED! Crystal, red-faced with rage, grabs the skulleted Heyross, and starts YANKING on what little hair he has left! In the meantime... 1. 2. 3. RA: Your winner of the match, and STILL OAOAST NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION, "SHOOTER" JAY DARRING! Cat: Zero was passed out from the Crystalling, and the champ somehow got an arm on top of him! Kelly: Jay Darring gets a lucky break, just BARELY retaining the title against two of HeldDown's top superstars! Cat: Crystal had this match WON! Heyross is gonna pay now. It's on! Even angrier after hearing the bell, Crystal drags Heyross into the ring, and really tugs on his ponytail-IT COMES OFF! Kelly: It was a hair extension! Cat: Not a good one either! Invest in a toupee bro. Heyross is scrambling for cover, but can't escape! Crystal catches him with a RELEASE GERMAN SUPLEX, RIGHT ON HIS HEAD. Kelly: Crystal exacting payback on Brock Ausstin's manager. Where is Brock anyway? Cat: Right over there. BROCK AUSSTIN HAS DOVE INTO THE RING FROM THE CROWD! CRYSTAL DOESN'T SEE HIM! She turns around, STRAIGHT INTO F-STUNNER-5! Brock isn't done-he picks up Jay, F-STUNNER-5 TO THE NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION! ZERO IS NEXT, F-STUNNER-5 TO ZERO! Kelly: OH MY G-D, WHAT A POWER DISPLAY BY THE CURRENT BIG THING! HE'S JUST ANNIHILATED THREE OF THE BRIGHTEST STARS IN OAOAST! Brock grabs the NA title and a mic from the announce table and gets back in the ring. Brock: JAY, WE'LL MEET AGAIN SOME OTHER TIME, YOU'LL PAY FOR DUCKING ME! AND CRYSTAL, GET USED TO BEING ON YOUR BACK BITCH, BECAUSE AT GREAT ANGLE BASH, THE CURRENT BIG THING DESTROYS YOU! (*"War Ensemble" begins playing as Brock throws the belt down on the lifeless champion and raises his arms triumphantly.*) Kelly: The undefeated colossus of HeldDown has made a big statement here tonight, can he follow through on his words! Tune into Great Angle Bash, this Sunday, only on Pay-Per-View to find out! I'm Kevin Kelly! CAT And I'm DA CAT~! KELLY GOODNIGHT! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted June 29, 2003 PROPS~! Director: SpiderPoet Creative The Amazing Rando Shooter Jay LaParkaYourCar If I forget anyone, let me know. © 2003 OAOAST Productions Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
