OAOAST IntenseZone - 6/30/03

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

BOOM!

 

Pyro detonates, fans go crazy and the camera pans quickly and wildly around the arena, taking in the OAOAST fans signs efforts. We cut to the familiar faces of Jim Ross and Jesse Ventura. JR has to shout to make himself heard above the roar of the crowd.

 

JR: BAH GAWD, WELCOME TO INTENSEZONE! LAST NIGHT THE GREAT ANGLE BASH WENT DOWN IN HISTORY AS ONE OF THE GREATEST NIGHTS IN OAOAST HISTORY! *coughs* LETS TAKE A LOOK AT THE INTENSEZONE MATCHES! THIS IS OFF THE CHART!

 

:: cut to video clips from the GAB ::

 

JR: Jay Darring won a brutal ladder match to retain the North American title and become the NEW Puerto Rican champion!

 

:: Jay grabs the North American Championship belt from the hook. He places the belt between his legs, and then grabs the Puerto Rican Championship belt. He now has both belts then falls 10 feet to the mat. The referee rings the bell and the crowd cheers while Sonic lets go of the Twilight submission on PRL. ::

 

JR: Via interference from ANOTHER Blurricane, Orion retained the F13 title!

 

:: Orion grabs the bloody Blurricane and hits the Youthanasia! He then goes up top and hits a Lo Down. Cover. 1...2...3!!! ::

 

JR: Mystery Eskimo won a victory of sorts by DQ, but Jailbait may have ruined his career!

 

:: Jailbait picks up a lifeless Eskimo in a belly to back suplex position and sprints towards the corner with the chair set up in it! Eskimo is driven leg first in the buckle and is screaming in pain! ::

 

JR: Banky and Dangerous A tore up the joint, with DA picking up a huge win!

 

:: DA lays Banky on his stomach, crosses his legs into a figure four shape, pins the front of Banky's ankle onto the front of his thigh, and crossfaces him!!

 

IT'S AN INDIAN DEATHLOCK STF!!!!!! ::

 

JR: In the 3 Stages of Hell match, Ed Robbins retained the Tag Titles for the Trinity over Spiderpoet, after the Poet's very life was almost taken from him!

 

:: Goblin holds the cocooned Poet up over the roof door and drops him.

 

JR

NO! NO! NO!

 

Poet lands in the web of barbed wire with a harsh thud and doesn’t stir. Edward, however, throws an arm over the edge of the ring from the outside, and hauls himself into the ring. He crawls over to Poet as another ref comes flying down the ramp from the back at the sight of a pinfall to end this thing. Ed ignores all the cutting and scraping of crawling over the barbed wire web, and drapes an arm over Poet’s neck. 1....2.....3! ::

 

JR: And finally we had some good news, as the World Champion, Zack Malibu, defeated Stephen Joseph in the Casket match to retain his title!

 

ZACK MALIBU DIVES OFF THE LADDER, 20 FEET IN THE AIR...GUILLOTINE LEGDROP THROUGH THE FLAMING TABLE...LEGDROP THROUGH THE TABLE FROM THE LADDER~!

 

Both men crumble to the mat, as security quickly rushes the ring to extinguish any leftover pieces of shrapnel from the table. The fans are completely awestruck, mixing chants of "Zack" and "Holy Shit". Zack yells in pain, obviously the toll having been taken on him, as Stephen is still motionless.

 

After several minutes of laying there, and having security and road agents rush the ring to check on them, Zack stands up, and waves them all off. He drags Stephen Joseph across the ring, towards the casket. Zack drops down and rolls out under the bottom rope, and pulls Stephen by the leg, into the casket. Once he's there, Zack climbs back up on the apron, and looks out to the crowd, who are roaring for him and applauding. Zack reaches out with his right hand, gripping the top...

 

And shuts the lid! ::

 

JR: What a night it was! And it only continues, right here, right now!

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

JR: Ladies and Gentleman, we're underway with a stacked show!

 

(*"Cloud Connected" by In Flames all of a sudden rocks the arena!*)

 

JR: And here comes the NEW unified North American and Puerto Rican champion, finally defeating Puerto Rican Lightning in an intense ladder match last night at the Great Angle Bash!

 

(Jay walks out on the ramps, the North American title hanging around his waist, and the Puerto Rican title hanging from the front of his pants. He slowly enters the ring and take a microphone.)

 

JAY:

You know, I'm missing a couple molars, I have a few new scars on my chest, some connective tissue in my spine is now missing, and you know what? I feel GREAT, because I have THIS!

 

(Jay holds up the Puerto Rican title as the crowd ROARS in approval!)

 

I won this for one of my best friends in OAOAST, the Mad Cappa- Cap, I know you'll be 100% soon, and when you get back, it'll be an honor to wrestle you for these unified titles!

 

(Crowd starts chanting "CAP-PA! CAP-PA!")

 

All in all, Great Angle Bash was a pretty damn good night for the Featured Attraction crew. Sonic Youth won a shot at the tag titles, beating two of the best tag teams in OAOAST!

 

(Crowd POPS Again!)

 

And we have a new member, an equalizer against the Trinity, the Featured Attraction's assassin, THE SHOCKER!

 

(CROWD GOES NUTS!)

 

JR: That's right folks, the Shocker made his return at Great Angle Bash, and he's on IntenseZone!

 

JAY:

I'd just really like to take this time to thank everybody on the FA crew for their continuing support and friendship, and most of all, thank you, the fans, for supporting me, without you I wouldn't have these belts-

 

-WHOA WHOA WHOA!

 

JAY:

G-d dammit, how many times do I have to beat you before you go away?

 

(Jay's speech is cut off by PUERTO RICAN LIGHTNING, to heavy booing!)

 

PRL: That little speech you just gave DORING, that's a load of crap and you know it! Thanking the FANS for having my belt? Ha, if it wasn't for Sonic Youth and those two unseemly whores he brings with him, those belts would be around my gorgeous physique! Which brings me to why I'm out here, to take back what is rightfully mine!

 

Jesse: HAHA! I KNEW PRL would find a violation in the Puerto Rican rulebook!

 

PRL:

You see, I found a rule in the Puerto Rican rulebook, that explicitly states that "In a Puerto Rican title match, any interference on behalf of the challenger NULLIFIES any title change!

 

JR: Ugh, not this again, makes me sick.

 

PRL:

So I guess I'll collect my belt now.

 

JAY:

Over my dead body!

 

PRL:

That can be arranged!

 

(Suddenly, THE DAMES appears on the AngleTron!)

 

DAMES:

Both of you, shut it, right now! I'm sick of this Puerto Rican rulebook bullshit. I checked your little loophole list before the match, and you're talking out of your ass, no such rule exists. Therefore, Jay Darring is the PUERTO RICAN CHAMPION. PERIOD.

 

(Jay grins as PRL looks like he's about to cry.)

 

DAMES:

I wouldn't be grinning if I were you Jay. That little stunt you pulled on Aggression, putting the North American title on the line, AGAINST HELDDOWN WRESTLERS, WITHOUT MY PERMISSION? You could have screwed over this show permanently, and you are going to pay DEARLY for your recklessness. So not only are you defending that North American title tonight, against DANGEROUS A!

(Crowd goes NUTS!)

You've got a PUERTO RICAN title defense tonight against Kyle "The Ace" Landis! If by some miracle you win both matches, the North American title will be PERMANENTLY unified with the Puerto Rican title! Now if you'll excuse me, I need a release. Baby? (off camera we hear, "yeah hun?") Get ready to get fucked by Unfuckwithable.

 

JR: Dames has laid out an insane challenge for the new unified champion, TWO title defenses against the crippler Dangerous A and the unstable Kyle Landis!

 

Jesse: Oh man, I'm going to enjoy watching that little punk suffer tonight!

 

(Commercial)

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

JR: Welcome back! We've already seen the Dames set Jay Darring a heavy task tonight-

Jesse: And you KNOW he deserves it!

JR: - and the action keeps on coming. Let's head to the ring!

 

"Come Out and Play" hits as Sonic Youth walks out, accompanied by Lauren, Janet in her red & black harlequin outfit and Jay Darring. Sonic rolls into the ring and climbs onto the 2nd rope, doing his crucifix pose. Suddenly, "Come to Me" by P. Diddy hits as Sonic tenses against the corner, awaiting Stephen Popick....however he isn't walking out. The crowd begins to murmur amongst themselves.

 

JR: What's going on here Jesse?

 

Jesse: No idea JR, maybe the guy's got stage fright.

 

"Come to Me" hits again however yet again, no sign of Stephen Popick. The ref talks to Sonic as Sonic nods his head. Suddenly the referee begins the mandatory 10 count.

 

1.....

2.....

3.....

4.....

5.....

6.....

7.....

8.....

9.....

10...

 

Jay rolls into the ring as Janet and Lauren climb up the steps and enter. They all converse in the corner as the announcer announces that Sonic's won the match via count out.

 

JR: What in the world Jess?

 

Jesse: Beats me JR, maybe something happened in the back.

 

JR: Maybe...well, until we hear more on that, lets get an update on the condition of the Spider Poet. Everyone saw what he went through last night.

Jesse: Well, I don't normally sympathise with the likes of Poet, but what occured last night was a nightmare for any living person, Jim Ross.

 

JR

Well fans, for those of you who tuned in last night, you know that the last we heard, our own SpiderPoet wasn't breathing at the end of their match. We weren't able to get anymore updates before the broadcast ended, but now we're able to bringsome more information to the table.

 

JESSE

That was one hell of a contest, JR.

 

JR

One of the damndest things I've ever seen, Jesse. SpiderPoet was legally dead for five minutes before he was revived in the ambulance en route to a local, Florida hospital.

 

JESSE

Thankfully. Kudos to the medics who were on call here at the arena. People don't know how much those men and women really mean to our productions.

 

JR

Indeed, they mean alot. Poet sustained countless superficial wounds from the barbed wire war that erupted between himself and Ed, but the MOST damage was undoubtedly done by the heinous actions of The Dark Poet at the end of the match. Take a look.

 

[[CLIP COURTESY OF OAOAST HOME ENTERTAINMENT]]

 

Goblin

I may not be a Spider anymore, but she’s a Widow. (To Widow) Do what I told you to.

 

Widow stares at SP, that same spaced out gaze, and begins wrapping the barbed wire all around him. After a few moments, he’s secured . . . in a cocoon of barbed wire. Goblin grins wickedly and suddenly tightens his grip, and Poet can’t do a thing. He spits up blood and sputters and gags, but ultimately . . . he loses consciousness and sags in Goblin’s grip. Widow silently walks over and opens the cell door.

 

Goblin holds the cocooned Poet up over the roof door and drops him.

 

JR

NO! NO! NO!

 

Poet lands in the web of barbed wire with a harsh thud and doesn’t stir. Edward, however, throws an arm over the edge of the ring from the outside, and hauls himself into the ring. He crawls over to Poet as another ref comes flying down the ramp from the back at the sight of a pinfall to end this thing.

END CLIP

(Cut back to JR and Jesse, and a loud murmur can be heard in the crowd behind them from the disturbing footage)

 

JR

(Shakes his head) All the drama, the pain, and undoubtedly the fear of those final few minutes of that match apparently caught up to Poet. His body went into a kind of protective shock when he came crashing down, and everything shut down. SOMEHOW, he's not paralyzed, and has been moved to a normal room at the Hospital, where we're going to go now. Kevin?

 

[Cut to a Hospital cooridoor, where KEVIN KELLY is standing by. He stands at the bedside of SPIDERPOET~!, and the crowd comes to it's feet across the arena with cheering and applause. The view cuts back and the camera sweeps across the crowd to catch the touching moment of affection and respect from the fans. It finally cuts back to Kelly, who can't help but smile as he watches it on a television]

 

KELLY

I'm standing here at bedside with the quite SPECTACULAR SpiderPoet. (Kelly looks to Poet) How are you, Poet?

 

SP

(musters a smile, despite the bandages covering his scars) I'm still kickin' just to spite 'em, Kevin.

 

KELLY

Last night was a WAR, Spidey, there's absolutely no doubt about it. Everyone thought that after your experience, you'd want to just take some time and heal up. I mean, it's pretty mir--

 

SP

Miraculous, Kevin? Yeah. It was. My body took so much abuse there that it just gave up. Just stopped working. I suppose that for most people, that would shut 'em up, heh. Make them withdraw, ask alot of questions. But you know what, Kevin? That's a weak spirit. I don't remember much from the time I was hurtling towards the ring until I was revived in the ambulance. Not in the classic sense. But I do remember darkness, and I remember something inside of me . . . something REFUSING to die. Refusing to give in, refusing to let my weak body deny me my right.

 

KELLY

Wow . . . your right?

 

SP

(Nods) I believe my heart, my soul would not allow my body to give up. Last night, Dark Poet . . . or Goblin, whatever he wants to label himself as now, saw something that I know scared him. He can change his name, tattoo his body, talk a good game. But at his core, he's just an empty shell, crying out for mommy and daddy, trying desperately to become his own man, by destroying the man I was becoming. But it backfired on him, Kelly. The more he tried to destroy, the more his desire and emptiness shone through, the moe I saw the problems in myself. And . . . something . . . something clicked. I no longer needed a persona, needed my mask. And I ripped it off. And I saw fear in his eyes. Because he could remove his mask, but he's covered his face, physically irrevocably. And he knew that I had achieved something greater than himself, greater than me. I knew who I was, found those eternal words etched into my soul, my very name, and I knew what it said.

 

KELLY

That's quite an insight. It must have been alot to process. What did you find there? Your name?

 

SP

(Smiles, a strange weight crossing his features) Hero. I knew then, as I watched Widow betray me, that there were bigger things going on. An evil, a deviousness, that comes from the deepest depths of my brother's heart and soul. And I knew that there was nobody else in the OAOAST that could stand up to him, nobody else that could satisfy his identity-lust. His heart is hard and he's made himself a monster, a Goblin.

 

KELLY

And what of Widow? Do you have any idea what prompted her to betray you?

 

SP

(Looks down and shakes his head lightly) I don't know. But I do know that such a thing was not in her naturally. He's done something to her. I don't know what. But I'm going to find out. Whatever he's doen to her, I'm going to put a stop to it and rescue her. The doctors give me three weeks before they will even consider releasing me to get back in the ring. That leaves one more week before License to Pin. Goblin . . . brother . . . keep playing your games. Keep trying to tear me down. You do everything in your power, EXHAUST YOURSELF. Kick, scream, cry like the child you are. Your reckoning is coming. Make it a match, make it a brawl, make of it what you will. You chose to pursue me into MY world, the world of wrestling. And wrestling is where we will settle this. I'll be at LTP. I'll meet you there. And if you harm one hair on Amanda's head, I will rip you apart with my scarred, bare hands.

 

(SP is fairly trembling with fury now, so Kevin turns to the camera)

 

KELLY

Well, there you have it. Death isn't going to hold down the Poet! A challenge has been made, and License to Pin already looks like it's going to have one earth shattering showdown! I'm Kevin Kelly, back to you, J.R.

 

JR: MAH GAWD, what intensity! We have to take a break, but we'll be back with Jay Darring's first title defence of the night!

 

COMMERCIALS

Edited July 1, 2003 by Mystery Eskimo

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

JR: Welcome back, and it's time for the NA/PR champion, Jay Darring, against newcomer Kyle Landis! Let's head to the ring!

 

 

"Ladies and Gentlemen," The ring announcer says, "the following contest is scheduled for one fall with a one hour time limit, and is for the OAOAST PUERTO RICAN CHAMPIONSHIP! Making his way to the ring from Boston Mass, standing five feet ten inches and weighing one hundred fifty-seven pounds, he is the OAOAST North American and Puerto Rican champion, Jay the Shooooooooter Darrrrrrrrrinnnnnnnggggg!" The crowd pops huge for their champ.

 

The house lights come back on and Dean Malenko's old WOW music hits! [Don't ask how they got the rights, say they got it off Kazaa] Kyle Landis walks onto the stage in tights and wrist tape. His long hair is in a neat ponytail. He looks the complete opposite of his other half.

 

The fans, smarks that they are, let him have it, chanting "spot monkey" at the newcomer.

 

"Can't get anything past this bunch can ya?" Jesse asks sarcastically.

 

The bell rings and they lock up, collar and elbow style. Jay quickly takes advantage with a headlock that he quickly takes into a hammerlock. Kyle reverses that into a rear waist lock just as fast and drops the Shooter with an amateur style takedown. He quickly floats over into a front face lock. He then moves to a back mount and unloads with open hand palm strikes to the back of Jay's head. He then reaches down and grabs a rear chin lock.

 

"A very fast and impressive start here Jess." JR says.

 

The more experienced Jay managed to work his way from being on his chest to on his BUTT. He stands to his feet and sits back down, driving Kyle's jaw into the top of his own head, drawing oohs from the fans. Both men are on their feet and Jay grabs a single leg takedown and applies a side leg bar. Kyle quickly rolls onto his stomach and twists his body to where he is in perfect position to grab an STF. He locks it in but Jay crawls to the bottom rope for a rope break. The fans pop in appreciation of the skills the two men are exhibiting.

 

They circle each other in the middle of the ring for a few moments and lock hands in a Greco-Roman knuckle lock. Jay quickly sweeps Aces left leg out from under him and drops him to the mat. Kyle responds by monkey flipping Jay over while still holding on to the knuckle lock.

 

"And the tables have been turned!" JR shouts.

 

Jay kips to his feet, knuckle lock intact, and kicks Kyle's arm, breaking the hold. He grabs the other arm in an armbar. Kyle turns against the pressure and grabs a rear waist lock. He clubs at the back of Jays neck and tries for a German suplex, but Jay blocks. Jay elbows Kyle in the face and turns around, delivering a boot to the gut. He picks Kyle up and tries a vertical suplex, but Kyle falls out the back and grabs a Dragon Sleeper which he quickly turns to a Dragon Clutch.

 

"This may be a submission here!" Jesse shouts. "The pressure on the back of the neck and back is incredible!"

 

But Jay inches his way to the ropes for another break. Kyle slides him away and picks him up, applying a front face lock. Before Jay can counter Kyle drops backward in a DDT.

 

"His head bounced right off the canvas!" JR quips for the blind and dumb. Kyle rolls into a cover but Jay kicks out at two. Kyle picks Jay up and whips him into the corner, but it is reversed and Kyle ends up backfirst in the corner. Jay charges but Kyle gets a boot up, stunning the Shooter. Kyle props himself up on the middle turnbuckle and grabs Jay in a reverse front face lock.

 

"He may be looking for a diamond dust!" Jesse shouts. Kyle jumps out of the corner and spins while somersaulting, landing on his BUTT as Jays head is driven into his shoulder. "A tornado Diamond Dust!" Jesse shouts as the arena explodes into a HOLY SHIT chant. Kyle covers.

 

 

1!

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

NO! Jay manages to get his left foot under the bottom rope. Kyle, obviously frustrated, picks Jay up and lifts him over his head in a vertical suplex. Suddenly Jay counters out the back and grabs Kyle in a rear waist lock, and in one smooth motion lifts him and executes a release German suplex!

 

"Head Droppage~!" JR shouts. Shaking the cobwebs from his head, Jay picks the rising Kyle up and twists around, delivering a hangman's neckbreaker.

 

"He is setting up his finisher, the Afterthought!" Jesse adds. Jay grabs Kyle from behind, and hooks in a half nelson. Falling backwards and releasing he tosses Kyle in a HALF NELSON SUPLEX~! Drawing ohhs from the crowd. He covers for:

 

 

1!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.5!!! Kyle kicks out. Jay picks Kyle up and sends him off the ropes. Kyle tries a clothesline, but Jay ducks and hooks him in a Northern Lights Cradle Suplex~! (A NLS with hooked leg)

 

 

It gets 1!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

He releases! His neck can't hold the bridge! He rolls over, clutching his neck in pain. Both slowly make their way to their feet. Jay swings with a lariat, but Kyle ducks and grabs Jay and drops back in a Tear Drop Suplex~! Jay bounces and lands on his chest!

 

 

"Now that was smart JR. He rolled onto his stomach so he won't be pinned." Jesse explains. Kyle walks over and picks Jay up and Hooks him in a fisherman's suplex position. Instead of just grabbing one leg he grabs one in each hand, or at least tries to. Jay fights it and eventually Kyle decides just to throw Jay off. Jay crashes to the mat head first and rolls out of the ring as the crowd explodes as Kyle drops from fatigue. On the outside Shooter makes it to his feet with help from the apron, while Kyle uses the ropes to stand on the inside. Jay rolls in and stands up just as Kyle fires off a right hand, which Jay blocks. He tries again, and another block. A third is also blocked and Jay spins and hits a massive roaring elbow to the jaw!

 

Jay drops into a cover!

 

 

1!

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Foot on the rope! Kyle gets a foot on the bottom rope. Jay picks Kyle up and sends himself bounding off the far ropes. Dizzy as he is Kyle still has the presence of mind to avoid the Lariat by delivering a drop toe hold! He steps over and grabs a strait jacket by crossing Jays arms over his throat, creating a new move, a STRAIT JACKET STF~!!! A small part of the crowd starts chanting TAP! TAP! TAP!

 

"Some of the fans want to see a new Champ! They want a tapout!" JR shouts.

 

"He can't tap JR!" Jesse responds.

 

"Why not?!"

 

"His arms are tied up!" Jesse responds gleefully. The camera zooms in on Jays face, showing the pain, his grimace speaking volumes. Kyle, knowing Jay isn't going to quit let go of the hold and picks Jay up. He hooks him in a vertical suplex, and drops down, spinning in a corkscrew Brainbuster! He rolls over and drapes one hand over him in a cover.

 

 

1!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.999!

 

 

"BY GAWD HE KICKED OUT!" JR shouts in shock. Kyle gives the cut throat sign and picks Jay up, applying a reverse face lock. He lifts him up, ready for the Ace Smasher, but Jay drops out the back and hits the Afterthought!!!!!

 

 

1!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"THREE!!!!!! Jay the shooter Darring Wins a hard fought match!" JR shouts as the fans go nuclear! Jay crawls to his feet and helps Kyle up, offering him his hand. Grimacing in pain, Kyle takes it and they shake. The camera zooms out as we head to break.

 

COMMERCIALS

Edited July 1, 2003 by Mystery Eskimo

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

(Coming back from the break, the camera is panning through the corridors backstage. It comes to one door, and slowly sneaks inside.

 

Blurricane is seen sitting in his locker room with a dazed look on his face. He looks almost catatonic, but his gaze is broken by the sudden appearance of Teddy Long)

 

TEDDY

You alright playa?

 

BLURRICANE

..............

 

TEDDY

Hey playa? Don't be hatin now. Speak to me.

 

BLURRICANE

.............he.......when I looked at him......it was like.....no it can't be real.

 

TEDDY

Son you aint makin' any sense. What are you babbling on about?

 

BLURRICANE

It was like looking in a mirror.

 

TEDDY

Say what!? What is he your brother or somethin?

 

BLURRICANE

I don't have a brother that I know of.

 

TEDDY

Tell you what playa. Call your parents up and ask them to tell you the truth!

 

BLURRICANE

My parents died when I was young.

 

TEDDY

Oh......I'm sorry.

 

BLURRICANE

It doesn't matter. In a little while he'll reveal himself like he said.........number 13.

 

TEDDY

Number 13???

 

BLURRICANE (Lifts his shirt to show a tattoo of the number 13 on his back.)

I don't remember getting this tattoo...don't know where it came from...but it's become sort of my lucky tattoo...but now I'm beginning to wonder how lucky it is. How did he know about it? What does it mean?

 

TEDDY

This is like some weird Twilight Zone episode...and this brotha don't like crazy whacked out crap like this. You are too weird for me B-Cane. Peace out!

 

(Teddy leaves as Blurricane returns to deep thought.)

 

JR: Crazyness continues in IntenseZone! What do you make of that, Jess?

Jesse: What's with all the weirdos round here? I don't get paid enough.

JR: Speaking of weird...the Masked Mystery Eskimo took a hell of a beating from Jailbait at the Great Angle Bash...and I'm being told he's also backstage with his friend and manager, Derek the Fish.

 

:: cut to backstage where Eskimo and Derek sit. Eskimo has a crutch with him ::

 

Derek:...you shouldn't even be here, man! Let's head home, put your leg in some ice, plenty of that, maybe get some ice for me, with a little vodka on the top...we'll go out, score some chicks? Sound fun?

Eskimo: Derek, you KNOW I don't drink, or chase girls!

Derek: Yeah, but I'm hoping one day you might, you know, grow a pair.

Eskimo: Can't you TRY to be sympathetic, for once?

Derek: Hey, Eskie, you took a beating. You've been around, just take it like a man and move on!

Eskimo: Jailbait didn't just injure me. He damaged my reputation. People are jeering me in the streets. They think I really did beat on a woman!

Derek: So? Let's go beat on some women!

Eskimo: *sighing* Be quiet. I can't go hide from this. That's why I have a match tonight. I need people to see I'm still the Eskimo they know and love.

Derek: People love you?

Eskimo: Yes, dammit!

Derek: Wow...so who are you facing?

Eskimo: His name's....er...Dan something.

Derek: So he's a jobber?

Eskimo: An "independent star".

Derek: You brought in a jobber? Man, that's just sad!

Eskimo: Fine, don't come to the ring with me.

Derek: Oh, I will. I want to see how badly you have to be hurt before you get some sense.

 

:: cut back to our hosts ::

 

JR: Mystery Eskimo seems determined to prove himself, Jess.

Jesse: Well, I think we all knew that the guy was a few ice cubes short of a refrigerator, and this proves it. He can barely stand, Jim Ross!

JR: Well, we'll be back with that match right after these messages.

 

COMMERCIALS

Edited July 1, 2003 by Mystery Eskimo

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

Coming back from the break, we hear "Too Cold' rocking the house, and Mystery Eskimo climbing into the ring very slowly, all his weight on his good leg.

Derek the Fish stands outside, drinking shots from a bottle of tequila and smoking a fat one.

 

JR: Mystery Eskimo taking on Dan Something...is this a good move Jesse?

Jesse: Hell no. If Eskimo wins, what has he proved? If he loses, he's a laughing stock. I think Jailbait really got inside his head and did a number on him.

 

Eskimo limps across the ring and shakes hands with Dan, who weighs in at around 250lbs and couldn't look any more generic.

 

Our referee signals for the bell.

 

Eskimo locks up with Something, and they jocky for position. Eskie tries to push Dan towards the corner, but his injured leg collapses immediately, and Dan shoves him down to the mat, charging after him with an elbow drop. Eskimo rolls away however, and Dan eats the mat.

 

Eskimo hops on one leg as Something gets up, and ducks Dan's lariat attempt. Eskimo ducks another, and lands a pair of hard chops on Dan's chest which rock him back. The Icy One grabs Dan's head and falls backwards, smashing him into the mat with an Igloo DDT! The cover!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

Dan kicks out, and Eskimo tries to get to his feet but stumbles and falls.

 

Jesse: This is pitiful! Derek, throw in the towel!

JR: Eskimo is brave, Jess, you have to give him credit.

Jesse: No I don't.

 

Something picks Eskimo up, and body slams him. Dan grabs Eskie's injured leg and just starts dragging him around the ring with it! Eskimo shouts in pain, but manages to flip up and kick Dan in the head with his other leg. Something falls back, and Eskimo tries to attack, but falls to one knee. Dan charges in, but Eskimo swivels aside, grabs Dan's arm and traps him in the Frostbite Facelock!

 

Dan's arm wavers, but he's next to the ropes and reaches out and grabs on tight.

 

Eskimo breaks the hold reluctantly and pulls himself up using the ropes. Something kicks him in the gut and grabs his head and neck, looking for a Diamond Cutter, but Eskie pushes him off. Something bounces off the ropes and dives forward with a basement dropkick to the bad leg of Eskimo, who goes down like he's been shot!

 

Something hooks the leg:

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

JR: NO, DAMMIT!

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

The referee looks a little stunned, but calls for the bell. No music plays as Dan, looking surprised too, leaves the ring. The crowd is quiet as Eskimo lies prone in the middle of the ring. Derek whips out a mini cell phone and calls for the ETA's, who rush down and load Eskimo onto a stretcher.

 

JR: This is a sad moment, fans. Mystery Eskimo has been defeated....and that leg injury looks to be career threatening.

Jesse: I'd like to feel sorry for him, Jim Ross, but the man is a fool!

JR: I don't know what's next for Eskimo...I just hope we see him again soon!

 

COMMERCIALS

Edited July 1, 2003 by Mystery Eskimo

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

JR

Next up we have a match between K-Ness and The Blurricane. K-Ness is looking for some competition and Blurricane just needs anything to get his mind off this stalker.

 

JESSE

The stalker promised to reveal himself tonight!! I don't think Blurricane should be distracting himself with a match!

 

JR

Perhaps you're right, but Blurricane isn't one to back down from a challenge. Let's take you to the ring for the introductions.

 

RING ANNOUNCER

The following match is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first...

 

CUE: Trans-Magic

 

RING ANNOUNCER

From Samar, Philippines...weighing in at 221 pounds...K-NESS!!!!

 

(The lights go out in the arena as a blue spotlight focuses on K-Ness as he walks to the ring. K-Ness steps into the ring and stretches while waiting for his opponent to come out.)

 

JR

K-Ness is all business tonight.

 

JESSE

He's always all business!

 

CUE: Rock You Like a Hurricane

 

RING ANNOUNCER

From Parts Unknown...weighing in at 191 pounds...THE BLURRICANE!!!!

 

(Blurricane comes flying out of the stage with arms extended. As he hits the ground he quickly looks behind him to make sure the stalker isn't following him. Blurricane swooshes to the ring and slides in under the bottom rope. He then tosses his cape to ringside and meets K-Ness in the middle of the ring.)

 

Blurricane gives K-Ness a "hokey thumbs up" and reaches for a handshake. K-Ness looks at him like he's crazy, but accepts the handshake.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

The two men lock up and attempt to get control. K-Ness Armdrags Blurricane across the ring and waits for Blurricane to get up. Blurricane gets up and dusts himself off before locking up again. K-Ness once again gains control and twists Blurricane's arm with an Arm Wringer. Blurricane flips out of it and hits an Armdrag of his own! K-Ness gets up as the crowd applauds the efforts of both men.

 

JR

What a show of athleticism by both men!

 

JESSE

What? I didn't know you cared about non-hosses?

 

The two men lock up again and this time Blurricane whips him to the ropes. Blurricane goes for a Back Body Drop, but K-Ness manages to land on his feet and grab Blurricane from behind. He then hits a Backdrop Suplex on Blurricane and then goes for another. As he picks him up Blurricane twists towards him causing him to fall off balance and land with Blurricane in a lateral press. Cover. 1...No!!!

 

JR

Only a one count!

 

Blurricane goes to whip him to the ropes, but K-Ness reverses it and hits Blurricane with a Western Lariat!

 

JR

Good Gawd he nearly knocked his head clean off!

 

JESSE

That would have been a cool visual!

 

K-Ness drags Blurricane to the corner instead of going for a pin and climbs to the outside. He grabs Blurricane by the right arm and slams it into the ring post! Blurricane yanks his arm back in pain, but K-Ness grabs it again and slams it into the post. The ref is yelling at K-Ness to get back into the ring so K-Ness slides back in and pulls Blurricane to the center of the ring. He yanks Blurricane to his feet using Blurricane's bad arm and then puts on another Arm Wringer. This time he proceeds to kick Blurricane's arm in the elbow region. K-Ness turns around and lifts Blurricane's arm high above his shoulder before bringing it down hard, almost bending it the wrong way. Blurricane clutches his arm in pain as K-Ness tucks it behind Blurricane's back and slams him down so that he lands on his own arm.

 

JR

My Gawd K-Ness is trying to break Blurricane's arm!!

 

JESSE

Brilliant!!

 

Blurricane tries to move to a corner for a little rest, but K-Ness is in and lays a few chops across Blurricane's chest! K-Ness grabs him by the bad arm and whips him across the ring to the opposite corner. Blurricane hits with a thud and stumbles forward into a High Angle Exploder! Cover. 1...2...No!!

 

K-Ness wastes no time in dropping his knee onto Blurricane's arm a few times. Each time he does it Blurricane cringes in pain. He then tries to slap on a Jugigatame, but Blurricane quickly gets to the ropes to break the hold. K-Ness pulls him up and whips him to the ropes, but he reverses it and hits a Back Body Drop on K-Ness. Blurricane waits for him to stand and goes for a Superkick, but K-Ness ducks it and bounces off the ropes on the other side. As he comes back he goes for a Clothesline, but Blurricane ducks it and hits an Inverted Atomic Drop on K-Ness. K-Ness falls to the mat in pain as Blurricane climbs to the second turnbuckle and comes off with a Leg Drop! Cover. 1...2...No!!

 

JR

Blurricane doing all he can with one arm to beat this man.

 

JESSE

No "super powers" will save him from a broken arm!

 

As K-Ness gets up Blurricane hits him with a Clothesline using his good arm. K-Ness rises to his feet again and this time ducks a second Clothesline attempt. K-Ness grabs him from behind and pushes him to the ropes for a roll up, but instead he lifts Blurricane up and hits a Backdrop Suplex, which he continues for 3 Rolling Backdrop Suplexes. Cover. 1...2...No!!

 

K-Ness pulls him to his feet, grabs him by the arm, and takes a running leap over the top rope, snapping Blurricane's arm across it. Blurricane falls back to the mat in pain as K-Ness rolls back in and puts an Armbar on him. The ref checks on Blurricane, but he refuses to give up. Blurricane starts to stand with K-Ness still holding on to his arm and he plants his knee into K-Ness' gut a couple of times causing him to let go. Blurricane shakes his arm to try and get feeling back in it. Blurricane sees K-Ness recovering, runs to the ropes, and bounces off for a Cross Body Block. Cover. 1...2...No!!

 

JR

See Jess he still has some moves left in him that can be done with a hurt arm!

 

JESSE

Don't tell me you really think he's a superhero?

 

Blurricane stands and waits for K-Ness to stand. Blurricane then grabs him for a One Armed Chokeslam using his good arm, but without the other arm for support he cannot do it. So Blurricane tries using his other arm for support and manages to hit the Chokeslam, but hurts his arm in the process. Finally he covers him. 1...2...No!!

 

Blurricane grabs him again as he stands up and this time he goes for an Eye of the Hurricane, but K-Ness manages to reverse the position so that he's got Blurricane in a Front Facelock. He lifts Blurricane up and hits a Brainbuster! Cover. 1...2......No!!

 

JR

Everytime Blurricane tries to get the upper hand his hurt arm keeps him from following through!

 

JESSE

K-Ness is a smart wrestler! He's taken Blurricane's power away!

 

K-Ness pulls Blurricane to his feet and goes for a Release Tiger Suplex '85, but Blurricane blocks it a couple of times so K-Ness shoves him off and grabs him for another Backdrop Suplex, but Blurricane gets his leg free and counters with a Jawbreaker. K-Ness doesn't go down, but he is stunned. Blurricane climbs to the top as quick as he can with a hurt arm and goes for The Blurred Reality, but K-Ness ducks and Blurricane lands hard on his bad arm. Then...

 

THE LIGHTS GO OUT!!!

 

JR

What the hell!?

 

JESSE

Oh now what!? I can't see where I set my beer!

 

When the lights come back on the ref is out cold and Blurricane is laying on the outside next to...THE MYSTERY BLURRICANE!!!! This time he's wearing a Black and White outfit. His shirt is Black instead of Blue like the Blurricane's. Mystery Blurricane places Blurricane's arm on top of the ring steps and then picks up a chair!

 

JR

No!! He's not going to do what I think he is? Don't do that!!

 

JESSE

Do it! Do it!

 

The Mystery Blurricane slams the chair down on Blurricane's bad arm, smashing it against the ring steps. Blurricane screams in pain and is thrown back into the ring. K-Ness slaps on a Jugigatame as Blurricane screams in pain again. The Mystery Blurricane laughs as Blurricane struggles to find a way out. The Mystery Blurricane realizes the ref needs to wake up so he grabs a fan's coke and pours it on him and even slaps him. The ref wakes up and sees the submission. He asks if Blurricane wants to quit and at first Blurricane says no, but the pain is too much and he taps!

 

JR

No dammit!! This is not right!

 

*DING DING DING*

 

YOUR WINNER BY WAY OF SUBMISSION IN 16:22 - K-NESS!!!!

 

K-Ness, sensing that it's not a good time to be in the ring, leaves quickly as the Mystery Blurricane grabs a mic and slides into the ring.

 

MYSTERY BLURRICANE

Get up!! Get up you worthless failure!

 

Blurricane pulls himself up using his good arm and stares his stalker down. Blurricane asks for a mic.

 

BLURRICANE

Who are you!?

 

MYSTERY BLURRICANE

I am perfection...created to be the ultimate athelete!

 

BLURRICANE

Created??? Who are you? What is your name?

 

MYSTERY BLURRICANE

I have no need of a name...but to keep confusion down you can refer to me as BIZARRO BLURRICANE! Father felt it would be a fitting name since I am the opposite of you in every way! I have succeeded where you are a failure!

 

BLURRICANE

Who is this father you keep talking about? My father died years ago!

 

BIZARRO BLURRICANE

That is not true. In fact nothing that you know is true! You weren't even meant to be here! It was a mistake! I was supposed to join the OAOAST and somehow they got you instead. You were a failure from the beginning. Father knew that so he created me! I was raised as the perfect athelete and this was supposed to be my time! You were supposed to be locked away at home!

 

BLURRICANE

What do you mean created!? What home? You're not making any sense!

 

BIZARRO BLURRICANE

You are not what you think you are. You think you're a man by the name of Gary Holmes who was orphaned at a young age and trained to be a wrestler, but you are not! Those were memories created for you! You see, you are a....CLONE!!

 

BLURRICANE

What!?!? You're insane!

 

BIZARRO BLURRICANE

You were supposed to be Father's best work yet, but you were flawed! You were the 13th attempt at the perfect athelete. Hense the name Number 13. I am Number 14. I am an improvement over you in every way!

 

BLURRICANE

I don't know who you are or what you've been smoking, but I'm leaving the ring now and if I ever see you again I'll call the police.

 

BIZARRO BLURRICANE

You know it's true! You've looked into my eyes and you saw yourself staring back!

 

(Blurricane stops walking and looks back with fear in his eyes)

 

BIZARRO BLURRICANE

It's time to come home! You will come with me now!!

 

THE LIGHTS GO OUT AGAIN!

 

JR

I can't believe what I'm hearing!! This man is insane! And now he's trying to kidnap Blurricane!

 

JESSE

Are we in the Twilight Zone or something?? What's going on here?

 

THE LIGHTS COME ON AND BOTH MEN ARE GONE!

 

JR

Where the hell did they go!?

 

JESSE

I need another drink!

 

COMMERCIALS

Edited July 1, 2003 by Mystery Eskimo

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

JR: And now we have...

 

::The arena goes completely dark::

 

Jesse: Somethings happening!

 

JR: On the Angle-Tron!

 

Stephen Joseph, head bandaged in white, but face clouded in dark thoughts, evil whispers, tumultous tumblings, clad in his trademark black trenchcoat, silver crucifix, and unholy gaze, appears on the AngleTron.

 

A quixotic stare silences the once vocal crowd, sending them back down into their seats like sheep obeying their master.

 

"This is my Anthem. This is my story, and it is not done yet. Twice now it has been shown that Zack Malibu is an unworthy champion. Yet he is still champion after last night, though he had to resort to illegal means. Remember the glass that Zack used...Completely illegal in that match, yet of course no one complained. I don't expect anyone too. And yes, I tried to light Zack afire, but then again, you expect a low man like myself to do that, but not a high and mighty Zack, who is the pinnacle of all champions...

 

"Zack, your days are still numbered, and your falseness will still be seen. Beware the third time Zack, for while I shall not challenge you again, I know what comes, and you will feel the pain.

 

"I feel the pain of a goal unreachable. I feel the sadness of pure joy. What is what, who is who? Am I not a champion. No, hardly, I more worthy than a champion to carry around a piece of tinfoil, leather, and gold. I am a servant, and it is still commanded that you hear my message.

 

"The Apocalypse of the OaOasT is coming, I am but a witness and prophet. I am an architect of its unique design. When the summer ends, things shall be clearer.

 

"People ask, what of Stephen Joseph? He is beaten. HA! I am not beaten until my lifeless body is taken from this place. My heart still beats, my brain still thinks, and I am still here. And not one man can take that away from me, for I am above you all.

 

"Poor Sonic, I am so sorry I missed our match tonight, but quite frankly, I grow tired of pinning you...There's not alot of fun in beached whales, and I see you're familiar with them...or should I say, are one yourself...But, if you think you're worthy to be strung up, martyred, crucified, for the sake of ending the pain in the oaoast, then maybe, we'll meet at some point down the road.

 

"But, back to my original point. I am the Alpha, I am the Omega, I am the S and the T. I am the OaOasT. You cannot exist without me, you better learn to live with me. Give up, stay out of my way, leave.

 

"I'll be seeing you on HeldDOWN...or will I? I mean, Zack, Some Guy, Caboose....it's awfully hard to see something coming at you from the dark

 

::The titantron shuts off::

 

JR: The dark? What does he mean by that?

 

Jesse: We will find out on HeldDown, but for one of those three men, it can't be good!

 

::Commercials::

 

JR: It's all about the matches here on IntenseZone tonight!

Jesse: That's what I like. More wrasslin, less whinin!

JR: Earlier tonight Jay Darring overcame Kyle to retain his titles. But it's now time for our main event, pitting Darring against a man who started very impressivley with a win over Banky at the GAB last night. The man they call Dangerous A.

Jesse: This is going to be sheer hell for Darring, I promise you that, Jim Ross!

JR: The kid's got the heart of a tiger, Jesse.

Jesse: That's got to be illegal!

JR: It's time.

 

MAIN EVENT

OAOAST NORTH AMERICAN TITLE

"Shooter" Jay Darring vs Dangerous A

 

Ring Announcer: The following contest is scheduled for one fall, with a sixty minute time limit, and is for the OAOAST NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPIONSHIP! Introducing first...

 

(*"Mr. Brownstone" by Guns n Roses blares throughout the arena*)

 

RA: The challenger, from Tokyo, Japan, weighing in at 240 pounds, DANGEROUS A!

 

JR: Famous throughout the Orient, Dangerous A represents "Shooter" Jay Darring's most daunting challenge to date. The only IZ superstar with more intensive and extensive training than Jay, with worlds more international experience, Dangerous A may be a mountain Jay Darring just cannot climb.

 

RA: And his opponent...

 

(*The blue spotlights hit, "The Fake Sound of Progress" fires up, and the champ is in the house!*)

 

RA: From Boston, Massachusetts, weighing in at 173 pounds, he is the OAOAST NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION, "SHOOTER" JAY DARRING!

 

JR: The champ looks more focused than I've ever seen him tonight Jesse.

 

Jesse: You call that look focus? I call it fear. The man took Banky out last night on pay per view, JR. Weight advantage- Dangerous A. Strength advantage- Dangerous A. Experience advantage- Dangerous A. Jay is dead meat tonight.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

Jay and A both meet face-to-face in the center of the ring. Jay extends his hand...

 

JR: Customary in Jay Darring matches.

 

-Dangerous A slaps his hand away and spits in his face!

 

Jesse: Haha, Jay, you should have known, Dangerous A shows no respect unless it is earned. Why doesn't he ask Banky about that?

 

*SMACK* Jay slaps him hard in the face! *THWACK* Dangerous A responds in kind with a hard forearm to the face! *CRACK* Jay connects with a hard chop to the chest! Dangerous A feels no effect- *THWACK* STIFF forearm from A staggers Jay against the ropes!

 

JR: Jay is on dream street right now!

 

Jesse: Dangerous A is simply brutality defined!

 

Dangerous A whips Jay into the ropes- Jay hits the ropes with a full head of steam- Yakuza Kick by Jay! Dangerous A is staggered but still in control- STIFF clothesline levels Jay! Jay is pops right back up- another Yakuza Kick! Dangerous A is still on his feet- and POPS Jay with a lariat, and Jay stays down! Cover!

 

1....

 

 

2....

 

2.9!

 

JR: I can't believe this! Jay has just been absolutely beaten senseless in the opening minutes of this contest by Dangerous A! I have never seen anyone just dominate him like this since he's been in OAOAST!

 

Jesse: I love it!

 

Dangerous A picks Jay up, irish whip, Jay ducks another lariat, connects with the STIFF~! Superkick!

 

JR: Jay's just scored with a knockout shot!

 

1

 

Kickout.

 

Jesse: And a 1 count!

 

JR: WHAT THE HELL?! Dangerous A is a...

 

Jesse: Don't say the "h" word JR.

 

Both competitors back on their feet, Dangerous A calls for a test of strength, he locks up with Jay...

 

Jesse: What a stupid move by Jay- he's just a bony cruiserweight, Dangerous A is built like a brick house and outweighs him by almost seventy pounds!

 

Dangerous A immediately pushes Jay down to the mat, Jay maneuvers his right leg to the outside of A's body and starts pelting Dangerous A's left arm with roundhouse kicks. Jay spins his body to the right and scissors that left arm, and takes Dangerous A down with a Fujiwara armbar!

 

JR: Smart strategy by Jay, if you can't knock him out, pick a body part and go to work on it.

 

Jay struggles to maintain the hold, but A is too strong, and starts to escape. Dangerous A reverses the hold, tosses Jay onto his stomach, and starts crossfacing the hell out of Jay! 1,2,3,4,5,6,7,8 crossface forearms!

 

JR: I think after this match, Jay will be a whole lot uglier.

 

Jesse: I didn't think that was possible.

 

Jay staggers back to his feet, Dangerous A tries for the running Hansen-eque lariat, but Jay ducks and connects with a leg lariat, both men are down!

 

JR: If there's any match that better fits the description of slobberknocker, I haven't seen it!

 

Jay snapmares Dangerous A down, runs off the ropes, running knee to the face! Cover- 1,2, kickout.

 

JR: Dangerous A still showing no signs of wear and tear right now.

 

Jay lights up Dangerous A with chops against the ropes, whips him in, Dangerous A rebounds off with a basement dropkick, followed up with a dragon screw legwhip, Dangerous A looks for the STF, but Jay is tied up in the ropes.

 

Jesse: Invented by Dangerous A's mentor Masahiro Chono, Dangerous A's STF is even deadlier than the original. If he had locked it in, new champ, no doubt.

 

Dangerous A tries to pick up Jay but the leg, but eats an enziguiri for his troubles. With A down on the mat, Jay immediately locks in the Harsh Reality!

 

JR: NO ONE ESCAPES THE HARSH REALITY!

 

Dangerous A is too close the ropes though, he immediately grabs them to break the hold!

 

Jesse: What ring awareness by Dangerous A, this guy impresses the hell out of me!

 

Jay drags Dangerous A back to the center of the ring, hammers on the weakened shoulder, and SLAPS ON THE HARSH REALITY AGAIN! Jay trying to keep him in the center, but Dangerous A is too strong, and he makes the ropes again!

 

JR: Dangerous A showing that his brutal training from Chono was worth it- he escaped Jay's submission finisher TWICE!

 

Darring picks Dangerous A up, irish whip into the corner, reversed- Dangerous A LEVELS Jay with the running high kick in the corner!

 

JR: HE JUST DECAPITATED HIM WITH THAT MOVE!

 

Dangerous A drags Jay to the center of the ring- POWERBOMB WITH A BRIDGE!

 

1....

 

 

2....

 

 

SHOULDER UP!

 

JR: I DON'T KNOW HOW JAY CAN TAKE THIS PUNISHMENT MUCH LONGER!

 

Jesse: That's because he CAN'T!

 

 

Dangerous A picks up the limp Jay, irish whip miraculously reversed, A tries a clothesline, Jay catches the arm, tries for another Fujiwara armbar-NO! Dangerous A rolls through! HOMICIDAL BACKDROP DRIVER, RIGHT ON HIS HEAD! A isn't done-POWERBOMB #2!

 

1...

 

2...

 

FOOT ON THE ROPE!

 

JR: That was a *very* lucky break for Jay.

 

Jesse: Ha, but the title change is in an inevitability right now. I love it!

 

Dangerous A is only getting angrier with each two count! He RIPS Jay's head off with another lariat! He's going for a THIRD POWERBOMB!

 

Jesse: This is going to be it!

 

POWERBOMB!

 

NO! Jay escapes! Fireman's carry- KT DRILLER~!

 

Jesse: NO NO NO!

 

1

 

2

 

 

3!!!!

 

RA: Your winner of the match, and STILL OAOAST NORTH AMERICAN CHAMPION, "SHOOTER" JAY DARRING!

 

Jesse: DAMMIT!

 

JR: Jay Darring, after getting DESTROYED by Dangerous A, retains the North American title with the KT Driller, and unifies the North American and Puerto Rican title!

 

Jesse: Jay better watch it. Dangerous A is new here and I don't know if you can trust him. Look what he did to Banky last night.

 

Jay Darring, looking like he's been through a meat grinder, rolls out of the ring. Eyes still glazed over, he turns to Dangerous A, getting to his feet after the murderous KT Driller. Jay bows to the legend from the Orient, and Dangerous A nods his head in response. Dangerous A raises Jay's hand and hugs him out of respect.

 

JR: The most brutal NA title match in IZ history has just concluded, what an event this has been!

Jesse: IntenseZone keeps on rolling!

JR: We'll see you next week, with more crazyness, brutality, and all the grapplin you need! Till then, I'm Jim Ross-

Jesse: And I'm Jesse "The Body" Ventura!

JR: -saying goodnight!

Edited July 1, 2003 by Big Poppa Popick

[Guest Mystery Eskimo]

CREDITS

 

LPYC

ShooterJay

Dangerous A

The Last Free Voice

Spidie

Mysterio Eskimio

bpp

Edited July 1, 2003 by Big Poppa Popick