OAOAST HeldDOWN~! 7/17/03

[Guest Zack Malibu]

OAOAST HeldDOWN~! OFFICIAL PREVIEW:

 

Dream A Little, Dreams

 

Last week, Shattered Dreams overcame a Battle Royal and a singles contest against The Slacker en route to claiming the Number One Contender Trophy, setting him up for a match with World Champion Zack Malibu at License To Pin. Since last Thursday, Dreams has been on a nationwide tour, flaunting the trophy around as the second coming of the Stanley Cup. This week he'll be in the arena to continue his braggadoccio ways. With the World Champion also scheduled for an appearance, the sh*t is sure to hit the fan at some point tonight!

 

Free Four All

 

In another preview to action at License To Pin, K Money puts his X Title on the line this week against his brother Ragdoll...but that's not all! Fresh off a hospital stay thanks to Ragdoll, Mad Matt is out for revenge, as well as the X Title. Add in the enigma known as Axel and you've got an X Division contest that'll have the crowd on it's feet, and more than one person out on the mat!

 

A Matter of Trust

 

It seems that the OAOAST HeldDOWN~! roster has seen a changed man in Anglesault in recent weeks. Tonight, AS continues his quest to prove himself to us, as he teams with former compadres (and rivals) Some Guy and Caboose in an effort to squash the goals of Trinity leader Stephen Joseph. Edward Robins will stand alongside his Tag Team Championship partner, but who is the mysterious third member? Is it a one shot deal, or has the Trinity gained another follower? Will Some Guy, Caboose and Anglesault be able to co-exist? With so many questions going into this, we are sure to be shocked by something when these 6 men hit the ring tonight!

 

Plus:The Dream Machines are in the house, newcomer Ted Weddy has something to say (and doesn't care if you understand him or not), plus a lot more. OAOAST HeldDOWN~! will be up shortly!

[Guest Zack Malibu]

OAOAST HeldDOWN~!

 

 

Comin' to ya LIVE~! from the OAOAST HeldDOWN~! Arena, aka "Wherever we feel like being this week".

 

Tommy Lee's "Hold Me Down" plays over the opening graphics, updated to include more recent HeldDOWN~! footage such as Axel in action, Shattered Dreams victorious with the Number One Contender's Trophy, and Anglesault Angle Slamming Stephen Joseph. Pyro shoots off inside the arena, showering fans in a sparkling display, as the cameras pan the crowd, who raise signs and shout in a frenzied manner.

 

And now, the Dynamic Duo, the men who don't always agree but entertain you and me...

 

 

Michael Cole and DA COACH~!

 

MC:"Hey fans, and welcome. Michael Cole here, sitting alongside my brother from another mother..."

 

Coach:"Who treats ya like no other..."

 

MC:"...Da Coach! We're comin' to you live as always, with one of HeldDOWN's best lineups to date this week."

 

Coach:"Right you are, Michael. Tonight we'll see some PPV quality matchups to be sure. We've got Hex Machina, a man who is one of the few to take Caboose to hell and back, going up against that motivated madman, CWM~!"

 

MC:"I shudder to think about what those two can do."

 

Coach:"I'll protect ya, Mikey."

 

MC:"...ooooh kay. What about the Four Corners matchup? There's tension in the camp of Black Label, as K Money and his brother Ragdoll have agreed to meet in an X Title vs. Career match at License To Pin. However TONIGHT, here on HeldDOWN~!, they'll make up two of the combatants in an X Title fourway, also featuring Mad Matt and the newcomer Axel!"

 

Coach:"Mad Matt is no doubt out for blood when it comes to Ragdoll, after being laid up in a hospital bed for weeks. Axel has started to establish himself,and looks to do so with another big win. Anyone could take that match, Michael, it really is a tossup."

 

MC:"Also tonight, the big 6 man, though we only know 5 contestants. An OAOAST Dream Team of sorts has been formed with former aWo teammates and former rivals Anglesault, Some Guy and Caboose. Their opponents are the World Tag Team Champions, Trinity members Stephen Joseph and Edward Robins. Their partner? Well, no one knows, but knowing The Trinity track record it's nothing to take lightly."

 

Coach:"What a show. You ready to go?"

 

MC:"I'm ready."

 

Coach:"Then let's do this, and head up to the ring for our opener!"

[Guest Zack Malibu]

"SATAN!"

 

Hex's arrival is announced and he emerges from the curtain to a chorus of boos. He strolls to the ring, looking somewhat less chipper than usual.

 

Cole: Hex Machina making his way to the ring, and I have to say it hasn't been a good few weeks for Hex.

 

Coachman: No Michael, it certainly hasn't, after taking a week off to recover from the devastating first blood match with Caboose, Hex did not make a strong showing in last week's over the top rope battle royal.

 

Cole: Hex was the first man eliminated from that match, and I can't say I'm very broken up over that. We'll see if the string of bad luck has motivated Hex here tonight in his first singles match with an OAOAST competitor other than Caboose.

 

Smells Like Teen Spirit starts up, and the crowd is popping hard and fast as the iconic CWM appears onstage.

 

Coachman: And wouldn't you know it-

 

Cole: WHAT? I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THESE FANS, COACH!

 

Coachman: I SAID WOULDN'T YOU KNOW IT, HEX HAS DRAWN ANOTHER TOP LEVEL TALENT TO SQUARE OFF WITH!

 

CWM enters the ring, and Hex stares him down. CWM raises a fist to the crowd's adoration, and Hex merely cracks his neck and crouches into ready position.

 

Cole: First Caboose and now CWM... Hex's initiation into the OAOAST has been no cake walk.

 

Coachman: To Hex's credit, he has managed to hold his own against the intimidating Caboose. Let's see how he fares tonight against an OAOAST legend.

 

The bell rings and Hex springs forward with a shot to the throat of CWM, and tries a spinning heel kick. CWM ducks and launches a dropkick at Hex, knocking him to the canvas. Hex is back up, but CWM catches him with a snap suplex, then bounces off the ropes with a quick leg drop and locks on a short arm scissors. Hex is able to snag the bottom rope and CWM releases the hold.

 

Coachman: Good ring sense there by Hex.

 

Hex gets to his feet and puts some distance between himself and CWM. He shakes out his arm a bit, and approaches. Hex lands a right hand, and CWM answers with a right of his own. They trade blows, CWM blocks and sets Hex up for a vertical suplex, but Hex shifts his weight and lands behind CWM. He locks on a sleeper hold, but CWM elbows him in the gut and retaliates with a snapmare. Hex lands on his ass and CWM kicks him in the back, then grabs Hex's head and flips over with a neck wrench. Hex somersaults backwards and onto his feet, and when CWM turns Hex is waiting with a basement dropkick. CWM goes down face first and Hex rolls him up with a Mahistrol, but CWM kicks out at 1 and they back away from each other again.

 

Cole: It's not going to be that easy, Hex.

 

Coachman: Hex looking for the quick pin. Some nice counters from both competitors here in the early going.

 

CWM strikes first this time, with a clothesline, but Hex ducks under it, runs across the ring and bounces back with a flying headscissors. CWM is back up and Hex is already running at him again. Hex leaps up into a hurracanrana, but CWM holds on and lifts him back up. Before CWM can execute the powerbomb, Hex rolls forward into a sunset flip.

 

1...

 

2...

 

kickout

 

Both men roll to their feet. Hex tries a high kick to CWM's head, but CWM falls into a drop toe hold, bouncing Hex off the mat. CWM springs up and drops an elbow across the back of Hex before applying an inverted deathlock. Hex is flailing for the ropes, but he's too far away.

 

Coachman: CWM is a master with submissions.

 

Cole: Hex has nowhere to go. He'll have to tap.

 

Hex is waving his arms around. The ref is on the mat, asking Hex if he wants to give it up, but Hex won't give in. One of Hex's hands finds the face of CWM, and he blindly smacks at it, which is effective enough to cause CWM to release the hold. Hex gets to his feet, trying to regain his bearings, and CWM runs at him. Hex has enough presence of mind to counter and whip CWM into the corner. Hex takes a few seconds to steady himself while CWM plays dead in the corner, then goes for a running splash. As soon as Hex leaves his feet, CWM steps forward, catches Hex and drops him into a shin breaker. Hex manages to stay on his feet, but stumbles a bit, one hand clutching his knee. CWM crosses the ring and bounces off the ropes, building up a head of steam and charging Hex. Before CWM can reach him, Hex dives headfirst over the top rope. He rolls through his landing and comes out on his feet.

 

Coachman: Hex is quick, I'll give him that much.

 

Without missing a beat, CWM rebounds off the ropes, makes a round trip across the ring, and just as Hex is turning to face him, launches with a suicide dive over the middle rope. Hex takes it head on, and both men are down outside the ring. The ref starts a 10 count.

 

Cole: Hex may be quick, but I think CWM has just shown us who's quicker!

 

Coachman: That HAD to hurt!

 

The ref is up to 6. A CWM chant breaks out, and CWM is the first to his feet, but Hex isn't far behind. Hex is on his knees, and reaches under the ring apron. He slides out a chair, but CWM pulls him up and tosses him into the ring before he has a chance to use it. Hex is scrambling to his feet, but CWM is already in and has him up. CWM whips Hex into the ropes, turns, and catches Hex's chin on his shoulder.

 

Cole: Polly Cutter! Polly Cutter! This match is over!

 

But Hex pushes CWM hard in the back and breaks free. Hex runs at the ropes, and as CWM turns, plants one foot in his chest...

 

Cole: Oh no...

 

but before Hex can add the exclamation point on CWM's chin, CWM spins hard right and Hex's foot only hits air. Hex tries to catch himself, but has too much momentum and crashes on his back. CWM climbs to the top rope, but Hex rolls out of range. CWM hops back down, and meets Hex in the middle of the ring. Hex throws a right hand, CWM blocks, CWM throws a right hand, Hex blocks. Hex goes for a left hook, CWM ducks and grabs Hex in a rear waist lock. CWM lifts Hex and smashes him to the canvas with a German suplex, and holds on. CWM gets back to his feet, and hooks Hex's arms. Hex goes up and shakes the ring as CWM drops him with a tiger suplex, but he's not done yet. CWM gets up again, still holding on, and pulls Hex into a full nelson. CWM pulls Hex back into a sick dragon suplex, and holds the bridge.

 

Cole: CWM~! CWM has hit Hex with a... a...

 

Coachman: A CHIMERA SUPLEX! Hex is out after a devastating Chimera Suplex!

 

1...

 

2...

 

But the ref notices Hex's feet are in the ropes. The crowd is counting along with the pin, and CWM hears the three and starts celebrating. The crowd is chanting CWM's name, and Hex is still out on the mat. The ref finally manages to get CWM's attention, and informs him the match is not over. CWM is not happy, and gets in the refs face.

 

Cole: CWM got the pinfall... but Hex's feet were in the ropes! This match isn't over yet... and the fans are not happy about it!

 

Coachman: And neither is CWM...

 

The ref is backing away as CWM is yelling at him. Hex finally regains his senses, and shakily gets to his feet. He looks around, and throws both fists hard into the small of CWM's back. CWM crashes into the ref, and the ref is out. CWM gets to his knees, holding his back, and Hex has time to lean out of the ring and grab the chair he pulled earlier. CWM slowly gets up on shaky legs, and Hex is standing behind him with the chair drawn back. CWM is finally on his feet, and slowly turns, WHAM!, into the chairshot. Hex winged it, there's a big dent in the chair and CWM's forehead is bloody. Hex tosses the bent chair aside and hooks CWM's leg, but there's no ref. Hex gets up and tries to revive the ref, who finally comes around, but CWM is starting to stir. Hex collapses back on top of him.

 

1...

 

2...

 

3!

 

CWM kicks out a split second too late. The bell rings and Hex is on the turnbuckle, throwing his fist in the air to massive boos and a small "Fuck you Hex!" chant.

 

Cole: Not this way! Hex has won this match... by cheating!

 

Coachman: Hex shoved CWM into the referee and blasted him with a chair! What kind of competitor is he?

 

Hex is still basking in his victory, when Caboose runs down the ramp and into the ring.

 

Cole: What is Caboose doing out here?

 

Coachman: Looking to continue his business with Hex?

 

Caboose is talking to the referee. He's pointing at Hex, pantomiming swinging a chair, and pointing at the bent chair. The ref looks at Hex, nods, and talks to the ring announcer.

 

Announcer: Ladies and gentlemen, the referee has ordered that this match continue!

 

The crowd goes wild, Hex looks like he's seen a ghost and CWM is pissed. Hex goes for CWM, but CWM hits him with rights and lefts, and Hex is bouncing up and down like a punching bag. CWM grabs Hex and drops him with his patented Conspiracy Bomb. Hex is laid out, but CWM hasn't had enough. He drags Hex to his feet and sets him up for a Polly Cutter, but Naz Mistry comes running down the aisle and into the ring. CWM drops Hex and starts for Naz, but the ref gets between them and pushing Naz out. Naz is arguing, and while the ref's back is turned, dealing with him, Caboose enters the ring from the other side. Caboose reaches into his coat and pulls out the cricket bat. Hex turns to run, but CWM is bearing down on him from that side. Caboose starts to swing the bat, and Hex has nowhere to go, so he drops to the ground and covers his head. Caboose brings the cricket bat down... across the skull of CWM. CWM is down, Caboose is momentarily frozen at his mistake, and Naz shuts up immediately. The ref turns and starts throwing Caboose out of the ring. Hex runs up the turnbuckle and launches into the N(X) Press. He hits it square on CWM. Hex yells for the refs attention. Caboose tries to keep him occupied, but Naz grabs Caboose and they start brawling.

 

1...

 

2...

 

3!

 

Hex rolls out of the ring and starts backing up the ramp, Naz following at his heels. Caboose gets in the ring and starts trying to bring CWM around.

 

Cole: Hex has escaped with a win by the skin of his teeth!

 

Coachman: Hex has now scored pinfall victories over both Caboose and CWM! I don't know how he did it, but he did it!

 

Cole: I know how he did it! He cheated his ass off!

 

CWM is starting to wake up. Hex pauses on the stage, and his eyes meet Caboose. Hex smiles, and gives Caboose the wink and the gun. Caboose has hate on his face. CWM gets to his feet, and he and Caboose look at Hex, then at each other. It looks like they might start brawling, but then Caboose raises CWM's arm and the crowd eats it up.

 

Cole: CWM! Hex! Caboose! How is this going to end?

 

Coachman: My guess is, Michael... not good.

 

Caboose and CWM pace the ring, as the fans give applause for the two favorites. Hex Machina disappears behind the curtain, as HeldDOWN~! fades to black for it's first commercial break.

[Guest Zack Malibu]

MC:"What did we say, eh Coach? PPV quality tonight."

 

Coach:"Man, what an intense rivalry between Caboose and Hex. This is one war that will definitely not end on a good note, no matter who wins!"

 

MC:"Speaking of wars, that's what I expect the X Title matchup to be a little bit later on. Here now backstage are one of the entrants, we take you now to Axel."

 

*The camera cuts to Axels darkened room, with Axel sitting on a stool, him looking down, and the camera looking up*

 

Welcome to my World. Brock, I warned you. I told you that you would regret attacking me. I told you that you were stupid for attacking me.

 

So, I attacked you last week. I injured you, Brock. That was the punishment. Now comes the redemption.

 

At Licence to Pin, Brock, I have been informed that I have you, one on one, in my first Pay Per View match for this company. I am here to make an impression Brock, I am here to crucify you.

 

But quickly onto matters tonight. I get my shot, I get my chance, at being a main player in the X division. While you are away Brock, nursing your little injuries, I will flourish and prosper. I do not care who my opponents are, I will show them, and everyone here, a preview of things to come.

 

Adrienne E. Gustof once said, "Living hell is the best revenge". Well Brock, I am here to make your life a living hell, until I am satisfied. Until I have pinned you Brock, until I feel that I have defeated you, I will not stop.

 

At Licence to Pin Brock, I will make you, feel the pain, taste the pain, and when I have beaten your soul, beaten your spirit, I will make you like the damn pain.

 

*Axel does the eye roll and picture fades to black*

 

The cameras cut back to Michael and Coach, who are shaking their heads.

 

MC:"Wow...just, wow. That's what you call focus."

 

Coach:"New X Champion tonight?"

 

MC:"I'd say it's a definite possibility."

 

Coach:"Speaking of new, we've gotten word that newcomer Ted Weddy would like to speak his piece tonight, however before that, we'd like to refresh everyone's memory of Ted's debut just this past week in the OAOAST on our combination effort, Aggression. Roll tape!"

 

 

(The vignette opens in a room in a room that looks quite familiar. A beautiful fine mahogany desk, American flags on either side, and a blue carpet that looks like it has the presidential seal on it. However, instead of George Dubbya, the man at the desk is a fat man with an afro and sunglasses, wearing a pink t-shirt.)

 

(in a ridiculously-high pitched, Dame Edna voice.)

"Helloooo, yes, this is Prrresident Teddy Weddy, I'd like to make a law that says all prostitution and drugs are legal, and um, oh yeah all the hookers must blllllow me. You will? Thanks for supporting me Senator Packwood."

 

::"If you'd like to make a call, please hang up and try again"::

 

"Well, hellooo, fellow Americans. I bet you're wondering what the Prrresident of United States of America, me, Teddy Weddy, is doing in the O A O A S T. Well, for one thing it's named after me after all- One and Only AWESOME SUUUUPPPERR TEDDY~! Additiononally, I wanted to increase my list of SUUUPER accompishments. I mean, my life has been kickass- after living in the woods of Maine as a child, and coming off the streets straight outta Compton y'all, I made billions and billions of dollars as the voice of Tommy Pickles on "Rugrats" while playing professional ice hockey and becoming the Emperor, I mean, Prrresident of AMERICA! But the one thing I always wanted to do was become a PROFESSIONAL WRESTLER. I mean, watching those guys on the TV, with all their grease and all their muscles-it made me HOT. So I found the best pro wrestler in the world to be my Maharishi of mat skillz, yo-DUSTY RHODES! And with his BIONIC POWERS running through my manliness, I'll be the SUUUPER CHAMPION OF THE WORLD, MUTHAFUCKAAAA!"

"But I ain't coming to this sheezit alone- I'm bringing my POSSE, my SECRET SERVICE! Come meet 'em."

 

(Julius Smokes of Ring of Honor infamy storms into the picture, kicking over the flags and smashing the desk with a jackhammer!)

 

JULIUS:

"BEEEAAA! BEEEEAAAA! BEEEAAA! BEEEAAAA! BEEEAAA! WHAT'S UP NOW!? YOU SEE THIS TEDDA, THIS HERE'S THE REAL DEAL! HE'S A STRAIGHT OUT 187 PLAYA, YOU FEEL! Y'ALL BETTER BELIE DAT I'M BACKIN UP MY BLOOD MY BLOOD-"

 

TEDDY:

"MY FLESH MY FLESH! Give me five homeslice!" (they slap hands.) Not only do I have the Train, I've got my own personal Jesus- GARY BUSEY!

 

(Busey ambles into the room, head tilted slightly forward, a deranged look in his eye. Busey faces the camera.)

 

BUSEY:

"This man, this Teddy Weddy, has been given people ingredients from another level. If you understand the dream symbology like I do, you know that this is one man who can take this place to the top! Hey Teddy, wanna go back to my place and smell clothes?"

 

TEDDY:

"OK!"

 

The three men depart, and before the camera fades out, it pulls to a wide shot of the Oval Office to reveal....

 

 

 

Paul Heyman's mother's basement. Say hi Paul's mom!

 

(fade out)

 

 

** We return to live footage. Ted Weddy and Gary Busey are standing outside of the arena **

 

Ted: "Waz up mothafuckaaaaaas, this is pimp masta Ted Weddday. I was juuusst finishing being a seeeecret agent for the CIA y'all, saving the Queen of France and having freaky threesomes with SUUUPPERRmodels, along with my compadre BUUUUUSSSSEEEY. Now we're checking out the hot chicks in their cribs and smeeeeellllllllling their clothes."

 

Busey: "That's right Ted, the funny thing about the anatomy of undergarments is that they're...."

 

Ted: (Interrupting Busey) "I would of tossed my huuuuuge salad in that shit if one of those girls didn't hit me with a frrrrrying pan!"

 

Busey: "Are you done interrupting me son. If not you can go on talking. I usually don't interrupt people like a royal jackass!"

 

Ted: (In an unbelievably annoying voice) "UUUUUUMMMMM... UUUUUUUMMMMM... UUUUMMMMMM... UMMMMMM... UMMMMM.... UUUUUUMMM...."

 

Busey: SHUT YOUR G-D DAMN MOUTH TED AND GIVE ME A STRAIGHT SHOOTIN' ANSWER BEFORE I STAB YOUR HAND INTO THIS RUSTY OLD STOP SIGN THAT HAS BEEN PISSED ON BY PEOPLE DRUNKER THAN YOU!"

 

Ted: (In a sarcastic and suave voice) "No assjockey."

 

** Before Busey is about to run over Ted verbally and physically, J-Train (Julius Smokes) barrels across the street in his hoopty, knocking over a fire hydrant and a shopkeeper's fruit stand in front of Ted and Busey like a rabid jackrabbit. **

 

J-Train (covered in watermelon and papaya juice): " BEEEAAAAA, BEEEEEAAAA, BEEEEEAAAA! TEDDA! NO RIPPIN SHIT UP WITH Busey! YOUZE MY BLOOD MY BLOOD, MY FLESH MY FLESH! OAOAST IS THE REAL DEAL, REALLY REAL! WE GOTSTA STAY UNITED! NOW let's make the fuck up and get back to business BITCHES."

 

Ted: (In a whiny voice) FIIIIIIIIINNNNEEEE. I'm freakin' sorry Busey.

 

Busey: I accept your apology comrade. Now like my friend said, let's get down to some serious imaginative business.

 

Ted: Fine mothafucka!

 

Busey: Ted, don't be a jackass.

 

Ted: Fine, I'm sowwy- want Monica Lewinsky as your intern at the ORAL OFFICE?! Heh heh heh.

 

Busey: That is fine, thank you. We're still cool. Just remember: friends are just enemies in reverse.

 

J-Train: AIIIIGHHHT TEDDAAA AND BUSSAAA, let's talk about cobainwasmurdered!!! On the pay per view, we are gonna fuck him up like no tommarrah! We are not only gonna steal his wallet, but we are gonna kick his sorry ass all the way down to third and shit creek!!! Now Teddaa do you BELI DAT?! MY BLOOD MY BLOOD...!

 

Ted: MY FLESH MY FLESH SUCCCKKKKKAAAAA~!!!!

 

Busey: I felt the power and symbolism in that speech J-Train... I really did.

 

J-Train: OHHHH HEEELLLLZZ YEEEEEAAAAAHHH MOTHAFUCKKKKAAAAAS~!!!!!!!!!

 

Busey: So Ted... J-Train... what do you want to do now?

 

Ted: I dunno- wanna knock over a liquor store?

 

J-Train: HELLZ YEAH!

 

Busey: Well said gentlemen.

 

** Fade out **

[Guest Zack Malibu]

MC:"That Ted Weddy is a character, to say the least."

 

Coach:"How do we get stuck with all the oddballs. Hex, Ted Weddy, Josh Matthews..."

 

MC:"JOSH?"

 

Coach:"Hey, anyone who used to hang with The Cat isn't all there. Everyone knows I got more soul that that brotha!"

 

MC:"Oh for the love of...stick to the format!"

 

Coach looks up at the camera, then sits nice and proper in his chair, folding his hands in front of him.

 

Coach:Welcome back on HeldDown. Next should be a great match. A fast paced match for the X Title.

 

MC:We have Ragdoll, Mad Matt, Axel, and of course the X-Division Champion K Money.

 

Coach:Mad Matt's return to the ring after an injury. The question is how many head bumps can he take. He was vague on that. Also Mad Matt wants to get his hands on Ragdoll and the X-Title is just a side bonus for him at this point.

 

MC:Also the newcomer, K Money and Ragdoll will have a retirement match at License to Pin.

 

Coach:This could also be a match to put the newcomer, Axel, on the map.

 

MC:Lets get down to the ring for action.

 

"Sabotage" by the Beastie Boys plays and out comes Axel from the crowd. He hops over the guardrail and enters the ring looking ready for this big match.

 

"Voodoo Chile" by Stevie Ray Vaughn plays and out comes Ragdoll with Melanie. He is coming to the ring. MAD MATT COMES OUT FROM BEHIND AND BLINDSIDES HIM WITH A CHAIR. He knocks down Melanie as well in that charge. Mad Matt raises the chair but the referee exits the ring and pulls the chair away from him. Ragdoll is up and Mad Matt tells him to just bring it but another referee comes out to hold these two apart before the official match.

 

Coach:Mad Matt attempted to take out Ragdoll before the match. He wants revenge on him. He wants it badly.

 

MC:He only got one chairshot but he may get more damage done in the ring.

 

Ragdoll enters the ring and Mad Matt is standing in a corner.

 

Coach:It appears that the referee has told Mad Matt if he lays another hand on Ragdoll, he will be disqualified from this match.

 

"Kick Start My Heart" by Montly Crue plays and out comes K Money with Josie.

 

MC:We could have a preview of License to Pin if K Money and Ragdoll go at it.

 

All four men are in the ring. The bell rings. Mad Matt looks like he is going to start out this match.

 

Coach:Mad Matt is going to start out this match. He says he wants Ragdoll but he is getting the X Division Champion K Money right now.

 

MC:They lock up.

 

Mad Matt goes to a headlock and K Money reverses it. K Money takes Mad Matt down to the canvas while in the headlock. Mad Matt counters to a headscissors. K Money kicks out. Mad Matt is back to his feet. They lock up and Mad Matt goes behind in a hammerlock. Mad Matt now forces K Money in the corner and forces a tag to Ragdoll.

 

Coach:Now Ragdoll is forced to face Mad Matt. He has been tagged in.

 

MC:Ragdoll doesn't look too pleased with this arrangement, does he, Coach.

 

Ragdoll is protesting on the ring apron. Mad Matt grabs the ropes and slingshots Ragdoll in. Ragdoll is crawling around but Mad Matt grabs him. Mad Matt fires on with chops. Mad Matt whips Ragdoll into the ropes and Mad Matt with a spinning leg lariat. Mad Matt now picks up Ragdoll and Mad Matt with a vicious kick to the side of the head. Mad Matt with another vicious kick to the side of the head. Mad Matt with a kick to the midsection. Mad Matt with a DDT to Ragdoll. Mad Matt now with a legdrop. Mad Matt now grabs Ragdoll and headfirst into the buckle. Mad Matt now with a dropkick right to the head. Mad Matt now whips Ragdoll into the ropes. Ragdoll puts the breaks on and tags in Axel.

 

Coach:Ragdoll took the first out in this match that he could.

 

MC:Mad Matt is now tagging in K Money.

 

Axel and K Money lock up and Axel with a go behind. Axel goes for a back suplex but K Money flips over the back. Axel with a dropkick taking K Money down. Axel now picks up K Money and bodyslam. Axel now bounces off the ropes and senton splash. Axel with a cover. One....Two....Kickout. Axel now picks up K Money and hooks him for a vertical suplex but K Money slides down the back. Axel with a backward kick. Axel now with a bulldog to K Money. Axel with a cover hooking the leg. One.....Two.....Kickout.

 

Coach:So close, yet so far. Axel had a two count on K Money there

 

MC:Axel had some impressive moves in the early stages of this match. It is still early however.

 

Axel now picks up K Money but Money with a shot to the gut. Money now with a reverse DDT. Money now climbs to the second rope and drops an elbow to the chest of Axel. Money with a cover hooking the leg. One....Two......Kickout. Money picks up Axel and Money whips Axel into the ropes. Money ducks and Axel hits a spinning leg lariat. Axel now climbs to the top rope and Axel hits an elbowdrop off of the ropes. Axel with a cover hooking the leg. One....Two.....Kickout.

 

MC:Another nearfall by Axel.

 

Coach:He looks to be going up top again.

 

Axel is up top as K Money pulls himself up. Axel with a clothesline off of the top rope taking K Money down. Axel now picks up Money and Axel with an STO on K Money. Axel with a cover hooking the leg. One.....Two.....Ragdoll pulls Axel off. Ragdoll goes back to his corner.

 

MC:Ragdoll saved the day on that one.

 

Coach:It could have been curtains for K Money. Axel was close to getting the pin.

 

Axel now picks up K Money and dumps him with a Michinoku Driver. Axel now goes to the top rope. Axel now with a frog splash. K Money was drilled with that one. Axel is going for the cover as Mad Matt is climbing the ropes on the other end. One.....Two......Thr.....Mad Matt makes the save with a double axehandle. Axel rolls over and Axel tags in Ragdoll.

 

MC:It looks like we are going to get that preview for License to Pin.

 

Coach:Ragdoll looks ready for K Money.

 

Ragdoll goes for a leg lariat but K Money ducks it. K Money superkicks Ragdoll down. K Money hops to the second rope and K Money with a springboard moonsault. K Money with a cover hooking the leg. One, Two, Kickout. K Money whips Ragdoll into the ropes and K Money with a dropkick. K Money now bounces off the ropes and Rolling Thunder from K Money to Ragdoll.

 

MC:That was a simply breathtaking move, Coach.

 

Coach:Yeah everything in this match would be breathtaking to you. You can't do half of it. Well most of it. Well all of it.

 

MC:Shut up.

 

K Money now picks up Ragdoll and K Money with a 3/4 Nelson Bulldog. K Money now goes for the Bounced Check but Ragdoll pulls him into a small package. One.....Two......Rolled the other way. One.......Two.......Rolled the other way. One......Two......Kickout. K Money whips Ragdoll into the ropes and K Money ducks the head. Ragdoll goes over with the sunset flip but K Money sits down. One.......Two......Ragdoll rolls through with a sunset flip. One......Two....K Money with a jackknife pin. One.......Two.......Ragdoll kicks out. K Money goes for a clothesline but Ragdoll twists it into a backslide. One.......Two........Kickout. Both men wipe each other out with a double clothesline.

 

MC:So many nearfalls right there Coach. I lost track.

 

Coach:I am not surprised Michael. You can barley count to three without getting confused.

 

MC:I told you to quit it Coach.

 

Coach:Chill dog. Sorry if I hurt your feelings.

 

Back to the action. Ragdoll is up and K Money is up to his knees. Ragdoll is going to the Devil Doll but K Money drops and rolls. K Money now with an Oklahoma Side Roll. One, Two, Kickout. K Money now with a boot as Ragdoll gets up. K Money now with a double underhook suplex to Ragdoll. K Money hangs on. K Money with another double underhook suplex. K Money hangs on again. K Money with a double underhook power bomb. K Money hooks both legs for the pin. One......Two.......Thr......Mad Matt pulls K Money off.

 

MC:Mad Matt makes the save for his mortal enemy. Hell has frozen over.

 

Coach:I think Mad Matt wants to get his hands on Ragdoll himself. K Money is now argueing with Mad Matt.

 

MC:Ragdoll schoolboys K Money from behind.

 

One......Two.......Thr.....Kickout. Ragdoll now tags in Mad Matt. It looks to be the X Champion and Mad Matt now. K Money charges Mad Matt but Mad Matt ducks. Mad Matt with a double chickenwing pin. All four shoulders are on the mat. One......Two.......Thr....both shoulders are up. Mad Matt now with a kick to the midsection. Mad Matt bounces off the ropes and running forearm smash. Mad Matt now bounces off the ropes and a cartwheel. Into a Moonsault Splash. Mad Matt with a cover hooking the leg. One.......Two.......Thr.....Axel makes the save. Mad Matt now picks up K Money and Mad Matt whips him into the ropes. Mad Matt now with an Asai Moonsault into a reverse DDT. What a move that was! Mad Matt with a cover hooking the leg. One......Two........Thr.....Shoulder up.

 

MC:Mad Matt is showing he hasn't lost a step in his time off.

 

Coach:He also must have devised some new moves in his injury itme.

 

Mad Matt now whips K Money into the ropes. Mad Matt now runs into the ropes but he hits his knee on the corner. K Money stumbles over and tags in Ragdoll. Ragdoll enters the ring and goes for the White Label but Mad Matt ducks. Mad Matt with a superkick of his own. Mad Matt is not going for the cover. Mad Matt now hooks Ragdoll and snap suplex. Mad Matt is hanging on. Mad Matt with another snap suplex. Mad Matt hangs on again. Mad Matt with a third snap suplex. Mad Matt hangs on again. Mad Matt with a vertical drop brainbuster. Mad Matt drops Ragdoll on the back of his head.

 

Coach:I think that attack on Mad Matt putting him out is starting to come back and haunt Ragdoll.

 

MC:Mad Matt is not done yet by the looks of it.

 

Mad Matt hooks Ragdoll and catapaults him into the ringpost. Mad Matt with a vicious kick to the head. Mad Matt with another vicious kick to the head. Mad Matt now with a kick to the gut. Mad Matt with a Rocker Dropper. Mad Matt hangs on to the arm and Mad Matt pulls both himself and Ragdoll up. Mad Matt now hits a version of Elix Skipper's Play of the Day. Mad Matt with a killer combo.

 

Coach:Mad Matt with a vicious combo. He drilled Ragdoll.

 

MC:If he goes for the cover, he could win the title right about now.

 

Mad Matt is not done yet. Mad Matt now whips Ragdoll into the ropes. Mad Matt with kick to the midsection. Mad Matt now goes behind and Mad Matt with a backdrop suplex. Mad Matt hangs on. Mad Matt with another backdrop suplex. Mad Matt with a deadly backdrop driver. Mad Matt drops Ragdoll on his head.

 

Coach:We can see the change in Mad Matt. A month ago he would have not have dropped a wrestler on the back of his head, trying to put him out.

 

MC:Mad Matt still isn't going for the cover. He is going up top.

 

Mad Matt is up and Mad Matt misses a 450 Splash to Ragdoll. Mad Matt wipes out the canvas. Ragdoll is slowly crawling over. He is groggy from that backdrop driver. Axel is tagged in by Ragdoll. Axel picks up Mad Matt and Axel lifts up Mad Matt. Axel with a devasting sitout power bomb. Axel with a cover hooking the leg. One......Two.......Thr.....kickout.

 

Coach:Mad Matt was nearly pinned despite that is the first move that he has been hit with.

 

MC:That was a move that effected the head, neck, and back. He suffered a concussion so you can see how seriously that move effected him.

 

Axel now picks up Mad Matt for a DDT perhaps but Mad Matt counters with an overhead belly to belly suplex. Mad Matt rolls over and tags in K Money. K Money enters the ring. K Money picks up Axel and whips him into the ropes. Axel ducks a leg lariat and Axel with a neckbreaker to K Money. Axel now goes to the top rope. Axel flies off and Axel with a top-rope legdrop to K Money. Axel with a cover. One.........Two...........Thr........Ragdoll saves at the last possible second. Mad Matt with a missile dropkick on Ragdoll. Mad Matt with an elbowsmash to Axel.

 

MC:We have a donnybrook. This X Title match has broken down into a brawl.

 

Coach:Everyone is going at it.

 

Mad Matt dumps Ragdoll to the outside. Mad Matt now bounces off the ropes. Mad Matt with a twisting no hands corkscrew plancha taking Ragdoll out. Axel is up top and Axel with a somersault plancha to Mad Matt. K Money is on the top rope and all three men are up slugging it out. K Money wipes everyone out with a moonsault off of the top rope.

 

MC:That was very impressive. K Money got some serious air on that move.

 

Coach:Lets see that in the replay.

 

We see a replay of that fantastic move. All four men are going too. Mad Matt throws Ragdoll into the ring. Mad Matt now is up top. Mad Matt goes for a crossbody but Ragdoll catches him. Ragdoll with a fallaway slam to Mad Matt. K Money enters the ring. K Money with a kick to the midsection and Show Stopper from K Money to Ragdoll. K Money with a cover. One......Two......Axel comes off the top with a frog splash onto both K Money and Ragdoll.

 

Coach:The referee is saying screw this and turning this match into a tornado match by the looks of it.

 

MC:Axel took out both Ragdoll and K Money with that frog splash. One for the highlight reels.

 

Axel covers K Money. One......Two.......Mad Matt with a somersault legdrop off of the top rope to break it up. Mad Matt now bounces off the ropes and Mad Matt hits a rolling legdrop(rolling thunder into a legdrop) to Axel. Mad Matt with a cover hooking the leg. One.......Two......Thr.....Ragdoll kicks Mad Matt off. Ragdoll with some punches and chops to Mad Matt. Ragdoll throws Mad Matt into the ropes and Ragdoll goes for a charges but Mad Matt moves. Mad Matt lifts up Ragdoll. Mad Matt with a crucifix power bomb into a sitdown faceslam. The Peoria Plunge. Mad Matt with a cover hooking the leg. One......Two........Thr.......Axel kicks off Mad Matt. Axel picks up Mad Matt and throws himv over the top rope and to the outside.

 

Coach:Axel has thrown Mad Matt to the floor and out of this match.

 

MC:Axel now is hooking K Money. What is he going for?

 

Axel hooks K Money and drills him with the Axel Slam. K Money was drilled. As Axel gets to his knees, Ragdoll hits Axel with the Devil Doll. That is the same move that gave Mad Matt a concussion. Mad Matt is on the top rope behind Ragdoll. Mad Matt hits the Quick Response. He hit Ragdoll flush right across the back of the head.

 

Coach:Quick Response by Mad Matt. Ragdoll is out cold.

 

MC:That has to do it. Mad Matt is the champion. Mad Matt is going to win.

 

K Money however is up and he kicks Mad Matt from behind. K Money hits the Show Stopper to Mad Matt. K Money now looks down at the fallen form of Ragdoll and covers him hooking the leg. One........Two.........Three.

 

MC:Mad Matt had the title won. Mad Matt had the damn title won. This isn't right. This just isn't right.

 

Coach:K Money was at the right place at the right time.

 

MC:He had the title won. He had it won. This just isn't right.

 

K Money is up but Mad Matt is up. K Money runs to the back. Mad Matt has a look of pure rage on his face. K Money stole the victory right out from underneath him. Mad Matt has the microphone.

 

Mad Matt:God as my witness, K Money is going to PAY for screwing me out of pinning that piece of crap on the floor.

 

Mad Matt runs to the back in hot pursuit of K Money. If Mad Matt catches him, there will be hell to pay. The cameras attempt to follow the duo backstage, but HeldDOWN~! has to take another contractually obligated commercial break.

[Guest Zack Malibu]

A camera approaches a door marked “HeldDOWN General Manager”. Slightly muffled yelling and arguing can be plainly heard. The door opens to reveal the Dream Machines in the middle of airing their grievances to Commissioner Moysey over what happened in the #1 contender match on Saturday. Tim tries to get them to settle down, with Eddy helping him out, but the Machines are too riled up.

 

PARKA:

I can’t believe this! The Trinity pretty much WALTZES into the ring during our match, destroys everything in sight, and NOTHING HAPPENS TO THEM? No suspension, no fine, not even a damn slap on the wrist? What is up with that crap?

 

KNIGHT:

I’ll tell you right now, Tim, if you don’t do anything to fix this; we know that they have a match tonight. We may just settle this ourselves.

 

They continue to complain loudly with the Commish trying to get their attention

 

MOYSEY:

Ok……ok……gentlemen…..excuse me……*rises out of his chair and slams hand on his desk* HEY, CALM DOWN FOR A SECOND!!

 

The DMs, startled, clam up. Moysey composes himself and sits back down.

 

MOYSEY:

Just so you gentlemen know, I DID speak to Dames over the phone on Sunday and we DID discuss what happened on Aggression. We were going to make a decision after IntenseZone on Monday, but the Trinity kidnapped Dames and I haven’t heard from him since. So, I’ve been thinking about this whole situation and I’ve decided on a plan. And unless Dames shows up and wishes to discuss this further, I’m going to make the decision in his absence. But I’m going to wait until Saturday and Aggression to do it, because I want Featured Attraction in the ring along with you two when I make my decision public. As for tonight, this six man main event is a very big match for HeldDOWN *he rises again* and I’ll be damned if it is interrupted just so you two could get an opportunity for some petty revenge. Therefore, I’m giving the Dream Machines the night off. Go back to the hotel, cool down, and just wait until Saturday. You are dismissed.

 

Still seething, the Machines stare at the Commish before Eddy thanks him and leads them out. Moysey sighs and sits back down as we head back to the Dynamic Duo.

 

 

Coach:"Man, talk about a rock and a hard place. Tim Moysey has done a hell of a job as GM here for HeldDOWN~!, and I don't think he had a choice in sending the Machines off. Granted, Tim as well as everyone else is sick of the Trinity, but he's got to maintain some order."

 

MC:"It's far from over though, Coach. You know that's a fact."

 

Coach:"Hey, I'm pickin' up what you're puttin' down."

 

 

"Fighter" plays and the crowd erupts into a chorus of boos for the arrival of the new number one contender. Shattered Dreams and Alix emerge from the back. Alix is carrying the number one contender trophy and Dreams is all smiles.

 

Cole: Here comes Shattered Dreams. He'll face Zack Malibu for the OAOAST world title at License to Pin. Call your cable or satalliete provider to order.

 

They position themselves on the entrance stage. The crowd's boos grow louder and louder as the section of the stage the couple were standing on begins to rise from ground, carrying Shattered Dreams and Alix 20 feet into the air!! The elevated platform rotates so Shattered Dreams and Alix are above the middle part of the entrance ramp.

 

Cole: Gimmie a break. Is any of this necessary?

 

Coach: Woah! How much did that cost?

 

Crowd: You suck! You suck! You suck!

 

Dreams: Get down. Get down. Get down! Jungle Boogie! Jungle Boogie! I have soooooooooo many people to thank and sooooo little time. First, I have to thank my Mom and my dad. I also must thank my dear sweet Alix Spezia (pats Alix on head) without her love and support I'd be an empty shell of a man. I also gotta thank 2 short, c-lo, bigge mac, j.ice, who else....

 

Crowd: No one!

 

Dreams: No, don't know him. Gotta thank pretty Mike, J. T. , Sugar, big mama, big mama's mama. Alix's babies daddy's mama. Which I guess would be my mama. Big shout outs to Kewl Dogg, L.note, Q.T. , 187.....

 

Cole: We've got to go to commercial!

 

Coach:NOW!?

 

Cole:You wanna lose the sponsors?

 

Coach:No way, my name isn't Calvin Szechstein!

[Guest Zack Malibu]

Cole: We're back. Unfortunately. How did this clown get a job here in the first place.

 

Dreams:....Mr.C, Mrs. C ,lil C, tiny c, there's a difference. I'd be remiss if I didn't thank Kate, Courtney, both Jens, Christina, Kelly and my manicurest Anna. Big kisses ladies!

 

Coach: Hey, he said he had a lot of folks to thank.

 

Dreams: But most importantly I want to thank you. Yes you! You the fans! Give your self a round of applause! A big huge one! Without your love and support none of this would've ever been possible! This number one contender trophy is for you! For you! Each and every one of you beautiful people!

 

(Alix holds up the trophy)

 

Cole: He's full of...

 

Coach: Easy there tiger!

 

Dreams: Let's move on to a more somber and rather depressing issue..

 

Crowd: Asshooole. Asshoooole.

 

Dreams: Such language belies a limited vocabulary. Moving on, I want to talk about two people, who are close to my heart. Two of my biggest friends in the universe. Two people who have stuck with me through thick and thin...

 

Coach: He's talking about us!

 

Dreams: That's right I'm talking about Choko and Slacker! It's come to my attention that those two will be sitting out due to a variety of injuries suffered at the hands of me. For that, I'd like to issue a heart felt Hollywood apology. (wipes tears from eyes) I'd also like to dedicate all my future matches to the memories of Choko and Slacker. God speed, buckos! Daddy loves ya!

 

Alix(into the microphone): Ed, can we talk about how you feel?

 

Dreams: How I feel? How I feel? I feel like it's gay pride week, cause I've had people coming out of the closet all week long!

 

Coach: Micheal why didn't you tell me?

 

Dreams: That's right, people coming out of the closet and admitting how much they deteste and despise Malibu Stacy. Oh sure, I still get the slovenly, sheepish fan who's crawled out of his trailer park to tell me that he hopes Zackie beats my ass. But, I'm not doing this for this for those people! I'm doing this for each and every single one of you. I'm doing this beacuse I know your tired of the mediocrity, the dullness and the complete lack of showmanship that's characterized Barbie's title reign. I'm doing this for all you people who come to arena with bags on your heads, so as not be to seen attending a show that prominently feautres Malibu Barbie. Kiddos, I'm doing this to give you a champion that epitomizes class, beauty, grace, style and most importantly good sportsmanship! God bless!

 

Alix(into the microphone): Awwww, he said all that without cursing. Give him a hand!

 

The fans don't give Shattered Dreams a hand, but rather a finger. The middle one, to be exact. Shattered Dreams throws his arm out in a Jericho-style gloating fashion, while Alix massages his shoulders. The fans jeer this public display of affection, and are all too happy when the lights go out!

 

MC:"Thank God for power outages."

 

Coach:"Then why is the AngleTron still working?"

 

MC:"I...oh boy..."

 

Michael's "oh boy" is due to the fact that the AngleTron is working, and has begun to play the AngleTron video of the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion...

 

BOOM~!

 

Pyro explodes, as the entrance video runs in sync with Evanescence's "Bring Me To Life". Zack Malibu and Alison stroll out to the arena, each one doing their traditional entrance of moving from side to side on the stage and working the crowd up! Shattered Dreams and Alix look down from their elevated platform, scowling at the man who will be in the opposite corner from them at License To Pin. The crowd cheers die out, as Zack Malibu raises his arm up, showing off the mic in his hand. The crowd comes to a hush somewhat, as it's Malibu's turn to speak.

 

ZM:"Now Dreams, before you get your thong in a knot, let me just say that I'm not out here to rain on your parade. I'm out here to give credit where credit is due. Last week, you survived not one, but two matches. You survived beatings from people who have beaten me, and lived to tell about it. Then, to top it off, you put on a hell of match, maybe even a match of the year candidate, with Slacker. That is quite a feat, and I applaud you for that."

 

Zack gets somewhat of a mixed reaction, and Dreams just draws in more boos by doing a little twirl and flashing a smile for the crowd, pointing at Zack and saying "He knows it!"

 

ZM:"See, when you started badmouthing me a few weeks back, I didn't mind. To tell you the truth, I barely batted an eye. You thought that by making a few lame jokes or distasteful remarks that I'd lose my cool and give in to your demands, but I knew your game. I told you that if you wanted a shot, you had to earn it, and you most certainly did. However, most people would call last week a humbling experience. Most people would show respect for their peers and give credit where credit is due, and the only person you give credit to is yourself!"

 

MC:"He's right, Coach."

 

SD:"Excuuuuuse me, Mr. Malibu, but aren't you the same person who walks around saying how much you love yourself? Pot, kettle, black, Zacky boy."

 

Coach:"OH TAG~!"

 

Zack snickers a bit, and Alison just shrugs her shoulders. The crowd cheers after Dreams' says it though, much to his disdain. A slight "Zack"chant starts up before he can respond.

 

ZM:"You know what, you've got a point. It's a well-known fact, I can be a cocky SOB. However, I've EARNED the right. I show respect to the other guys on this roster. I bust my ass day in and day out to make this belt over my shoulder mean something. There was a point, Dreams, when I was like you. When The In Crowd was all about partying first, wrestling later. There was a time where we were on top of the world and everything else was just a stepping stone. Then something happened...these people, the ones sitting in the seats tonight, and the ones watching at home...THEY started to take notice. THEY started to show respect to a guy who didn't care if he won or lost, but if he looked good doing it! The PEOPLE humbled me, Dreams. It's an old saying that "Respect is given when earned." So I started to give respect back. To the fans. To my opponents. To guys like Michael Cole sitting over their in the broadcast position. A win/loss record is not what got me this title, or a main event spot. RESPECT is what got me that spot. Now you think that because you win a match or two or twenty, that you're a worthy champion? You think because you've got a pretty lady in your corner, a good look and a flashy entrance that you're the shit? I don't care what happens at License To Pin. I don't care if you beat my ass from corner to corner and walk away with this belt, because if you do emerge victorious, you're a champion in name only. You'll never be a champion until you earn respect!"

 

Dreams' jaw drops, as Alix scowls. Alix pats her fuming employer on the back, as he lifts his mic up, ready for rebuttal.

 

Dreams: Wow. That incredibly, boring, long winded, dull and totally cliche speech was just a vehicle for you to say I don't respect you? Next time hit me up on two-way, or something. Zack, you've got me all wrong baby. All wrong. I used to have all the respect in the world for you! I used to respect you so much that I had to sneak into people's homes, steal their respect and give it to you. But not anymore, bucko! Not anymore. No sireee! Noper! No way! I have ZERO respect for you. Zero. One minus One equals the amount of respect I have for you. Zero. Do you wanna know why I don't respectacate you anymore?

 

Zack: Yes

 

Dreams: Sure you wanna know?

 

Zack: Yes

 

Dreams: Are you positive that you're sure that you wanna know?

 

Zack: Hurry up and tell me, moron!

 

Dreams: Ready, okay! Barbie doll, you're not a real person with real feelings or thoughts. Everything you say is cliche and trite or ripped off from a low budget after school special. I used to respect you until I saw you for what you really are. A shadow of a once great man. The remnants of a truly great wrestler. You used to be a mother fucking person! What are you now Barbie? You're nothing but an amalgam of marketing gimmicks and past trends. You're not hip and cutting edge any more. You're stale and generic. The old Zack Malibu would've jumped at the chance to face me in a match. The old Zack Malibu would've gotten a ladder, climbed up here and kicked my ass. Unfortunately, the new Zack Malibu is a dickless coward trying to cling to his past glory. The old Zack Malibu is dead. He's been replaced by Malibu Barbie.

 

Cole: I don't think I agree with what he's trying to say

 

Dreams: Long live Shattered Dreams! Long live the savior of the OAOAST! Long live the man who will revolutionize sports entertainment. Long live the man who will bring prestige and respect back to the downtrodden world title. Fuck all you non believers. Fuck you to Barbie. Your shits defective, it's been recalled. Thank you and have a pleasant day.

 

Crowd: You suck! You suck! You suck!

 

"Fighter" cues up again, and the platform lowers back down. Zack Malibu and Alison keep their eye on the couple the whole time, disgusted by the social commentary of Shattered Dreams. Dreams and Alix step off of the platform and onto the stage, heading to the back. Before disappearing through the curtain, Dreams comes over and pats the World Championship, rested on Zack's shoulder. Zack shoots icicles from his eyes, as he coldly stares at his snobby rival, before heading to the back himself.

 

MC:"That was quite the intense several minutes, Coach. Shattered Dreams is accusing Zack of being the one who changed, rather than placing the blame on himself!"

 

Coach:"These two were friends harkening back to the very first edition of HeldDOWN~! where Dreams helped save Alison from an attack by his then partners The Dream Machines. Things definitely changed since then, but it's not Zack Malibu's fault at all. The man is a fighting champion, and Dreams still attempts to paint him as a coward!"

 

MC:"Maybe he's insecure?"

 

Coach:"Oh I don't think so at all. I think he's too into himself. That's why this feud is all the more interesting. Remember a year and a half ago, when Zack first came in. He was much like Shattered Dreams is right now. It seems that SD is taking a page out of the old Zack's book in an effort to get under the Zack we know and love's skin."

 

MC:"Another situation that is heating up, and has already made License To Pin a must-order event. As for Must See TV, forget NBC tonight, because when we come back, we've got the anticipated 6 Man Tag~!"

[Guest Zack Malibu]

::CUE: Dream On, Aerosmith::

 

Familiar riffs of long-winded AND long-haired guitar boys waif through the OaOasT arena. Fans everywhere come alive as AngleSault, Some Guy, and Caboose walk out from beneath the curtain on the HeldDOWN~! set. As the three men continue to walk, taking time to pose to the crowd, a familiar chant begins to be heard across the land.

 

Cole: Can you believe this? They said they could never be back, but for one night only, the members of the a.W.o are teaming up!

 

Coach: It's a wave of nostalgia! I feel so, overwhelmed!

 

Three men, united by a hatred of one man, walk down the ramp towards the ring, slapping fans hands, talking, jabbing, with jubilant expressions on their faces...Well, all except for Caboose, who is typically morose.

 

Sliding under the ring, they run to the ring ropes, pyro exploding as the chorus of Dream On hits. The lights go up, the crowd is standing.

 

AngleSault pulls a microphone from his back pockets.

 

AS: Hey Hey! It's kinda funny, last time we were facing Mr. Stephen, you all cheered him like no one else, and he and his ilk deprived you of our wonderful world order. BUT, maybe we deserved it. We wanted to take over the OaOasT. BUT Never, NEVER! did we want to Destroy it like he does now. It stops tonight! On this we three swear!

 

AngleSault's mic cuts off as he tries to finish. He throws it down in disgust, then starts to exit the ring to get a new one.

 

He is met with darkness.

 

::Cue: Come With Me, P. Diddy::

 

Insta-Cheers turn to Insta-Jeers, or morseo, complete and utter hatred. From behind the curtain, Stephen Joseph and Edward Robbins, replete with shinging and glistening OAOAST Tag Team gold around their waists, walk slowly out to suck up the ill will towards them. They have no third partner with them.

 

Cole: So, who's the third guy?

 

CHILLING ORGAN MUSIC HITS AS:

 

Darkness fills the arena. Thunder cracks throughout the sold out building. Smoke rises around the entrance set.

 

COLE

Coach, am I the only one, or are you feeling kinda cold?

 

COACH

This is surreal. Almost supernatural.

 

A silhoutte emgeres from the entrance. Covered in black, this mysterious and haunting figure heads towards the ring. Head down. It's IZUAL.

 

Stunned silence.

 

COLE

W-Who is that?

 

COACH

What is that?

 

COLE

Fans, we're as stunned as you are. All we know about this -- the name is Izual.

 

Izual stands on the ring apron. Izual raises his hands ala the Undertaker, the lights return. Izual enters the ring with the Trinity, letting the combined forces of AS, SG, and Caboose to slide out.

 

COLE

Look at the size. Whatever it is, it has to be near 7 feet tall.

 

COACH

This is whacked. Hold me, Michael.

 

Izual stands still in the center of the ring. Chilling sight.

 

The black cover glove grabs the hood, removes it to reveal...

 

TONY "THE BODY"!

 

Mixed reaction.

 

COLE

Oh my!

 

COACH

Wow!

 

COLE

B-but how? Tony's appeal to the board of directors was shot down months ago.

 

TONY

It's me -- whoops. Sorry, wrong script. Heh. But yes, it is I. Some of you are probably thinking "You're retired. How?"

 

COLE

That's a question everybody wants to know.

 

TONY

While I doubt anybody cares about such a thing, as I'm back...well, for one night only at least. But I know a couple of smarks will bitch and whine unless we somehow keep continuity. So I have prepared such a response.

 

As many of you know, months ago the OAOAST board of directors threw out my appeal to allow me to continue wrestling, even though I lost a match. Let me tell the board somethin' -- FUCK YOU!

 

You see, I HATE rejection. So I went out and hired Johnnie Cocheran. That son of a bitch has gotten murders off the hook, and has-been directors cash settlements over stupid lawsuit. Once the OAOAST received noticed of a lawsuit lead by my new lawyor; they caved in. Not only did I get an excellent cash settlement, I got the "career vs. respect" match stip dropped.

 

CROWD BOOS.

 

TONY

Yep. I'm allowed to 'rassle again.

 

COLE

Incredible.

 

COACH

Johnnie's a great lawyor.

 

TONY

Which brings me to tonight. A week ago I get a call from one of my best friends in the OAOAST -- yes I said FRIEND -- Stephen Joseph. Stephen, thanks for the offer. You see, he asked if I'd accept an offer to join in a 6-man tag match on the one number show on Thursday nights -- HeldDOWN! I said "well, I don't like Caboose. I REALLY don't like Some Guy. AS unofficially changed his name to ASS. So yeah, I'll accept."

 

COACH

Big comments coming from Tony.

 

TONY

But the biggest reason I accepted was because a man I thought was a friend has taken a turn for the worst.

 

COLE

Who's he talking about?

 

TONY

Anglesault.

 

CROWD CHEERS.

 

TONY

AS, what happened to you? What happened to the Anglesault who lead the aWo, and nearly brought the OAOAST to its knees? What happened to the AS who didn't give a shit what you thought?

 

Remember when you complained about being a good guy last year? Remember being pissed at the OAOAST for marketing you as something you weren't, for the sake of making a quick buck off you? Need I remind you of the t-shirts, posters, videos, and even the condom shape of your head?

 

All I ask is: why? 'Sault, you've become the very thing you fought hard about online. AS, you've becomed pussified. In other words, you're now good guy, goofy...KURT ANGLE!

 

CROWD OHS.

 

COLE

Why that no good rotten son of a --

 

COACH

Easy.

 

TONY

As we embark on the following 6-man, remember your roots. Remember how you won the OAOAST championship. I ask you as a FRIEND, come back home, Anglesault. (softly) Come back.

 

*DING DING DING*

 

Cole: 6 man tag action NEXT ON HELDDOWN!

 

::CUE: Commercials::

 

Cole: We're back!

 

Coach: The teams are in their corners. Some Guy and Edward Robbins to start out!

 

Announcer: The following match is set for one fall!

 

Cole: Only 1 man has to be pinned!

 

Coach: Wow, you're so insightful!

 

Edward and SomeGuy circle around, each taking his time, knowing mistakes do pay in this game. Edward, once the man who aligned himself with these men, now seeks to return the pain he feels from their failures.

 

They lock up, SomeGuy slipping into a hammerlock around Ed's waist, squezzing in Robin's gut so hard that he's probably remembering what he ate last. Edward tries to push the hands down, finally wedging his right hand into the gap between. He breaks the hold, and takes SG down into an arm-breaker, tearing the arm out of the socket while trying to break it at the elbow too.

 

SG wiggles around, trying to gain a way to get out. He pulls his right leg close to his body, and twists over to cradle Edward...Count gets 1!

 

SG is up, shaking his arm, and gets plummeted by a Robbins Special Deluxe Clothesline That Really Freaking Hurts. Robbins tags in Tony.

 

Tony dances around, jiving around and kicking SomeGuy. On his third kick, SG catches the leg to Tony's suprise, and sends him flying with a Dragon Screw Legwhip! SG tags in Caboose out of desperation.

 

Caboose runs right through Tony with a Yakuza Kick, and following it up with several elbow drops. With Tony's lights fading, he whips Tony across the ropes...END OF THE LINE~! NO! OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE~! Both men are down...but TONY KIPS UP...TONY'S ELBOW, TONY'S ELBOW~! TONY'S ELBOW CONNECTS as the crowd boos. Tony covers

 

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

NO!

 

Imitation isn't as good as the original, the move doesn't get the pin. Dazed, grogged, Caboose is picked up and scoop slammed down near the turnbuckle. Tony scales for a high risk move while Caboose stands and turns around... DOUBLE AXEHANDLE...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

END OF THE LINE! Tony's head careens back into the turnbuckle while Caboose falls back down. Both corners scream at the other to get back...and Tony and Caboose crawl back...Tony gets there first, but Caboose gets a tag in too!

 

AngleSault...Stephen Joseph! They meet in the middle, but don't fight, instead they exchange and hurl insults for at least a minute, getting the crowd really riled up. Joseph slaps the taste of of AS's mouth, spit flying everywhere!

 

AS takes offense, chopping Stephen Joseph back to his corner, tagging back in Caboose.

 

Caboose meets Stephen with a chokehold down to the mat. He pulls up a three...and covers!

 

 

1

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

NO! Edward pulls Caboose off!

 

Caboose takes affront, and hits a EMERALD FUSION ON EDWARD!

 

Caboose turns around, and Stephen is right there. DESPERATION SYNCHRONICITY V3! Both men crumple!

 

Caboose, slowly, tries to come around to crawl toward both men...while Stephen crawls toward his corner. Caboose turns around and grabs Stephen's leg, pulling him toward the aWo corner.

 

Caboose lunges and tags both partners! AS picks Stephen up and throws him toward the turnbuckle, then placing him on the top facing outside! Stephen atop the turnbuckle, is in a world of hurt. SG scales opposite, and it looks like he wants to flip over Stephen to hit a top rope inverted ddt!

 

Tony grabs Caboose, and with Edward disposed, takes to fighting with Caboose around the ring fisticuff style.

 

Stephen lunges at SG on the ropes, and locks a hammerhold into AS's stomach. It looks like a top Rope German! AngleSault to the rescue with a springboard sunset flip powerbomb ALA Jerry Lynn as SG is Germaned off! SG's neck hits the canvas first, but Stephen Joseph lands badly too. AS sits down holding BPP's shoulders down

 

Both referees see the pinfall attempt, and come over to count.

 

 

 

1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3!!!!

 

 

 

 

Each referee signals for the bell, but begin to argue at ringside. Finally, the announcer gets a message across.

 

Announcer: Following the referee's decision, a DOUBLE PINFALL has been recorded. SomeGuy's shoulders were down with Stephen Joseph clearly pinning him after an offensive maneuver. However, AngleSault also clearly pinned Stephen Joseph in the same manner. ThereFORE, this match has been ruled a draw.

 

::Crowd boos::

 

::The ANGLETRON flares up, its TIM MOYSEY~!::

 

Tim: Fans of HeldDown, while the match was good, you got robbed out of a decent finish, no thanks to Stephen Joseph. Therefore, MR. Tag Team champion, NOT ONLY are you defending your tag team titles at License to Pin, but you're going to face BOTH SomeGuy and AngleSault in Singles Matches that very NIGHT!

 

::Crowd pops::

 

Tim: Additionally, should you lose any match that night, You and Edward Robbins will be released of your contracts...You understand...FIRED!

 

::Crowd REALLY pops::

 

Tim: Have a SUPER day!

 

*The cameras close in on Tim's gleeful smile on the AngleTron. Stephen and Edward ponder this scenario, their eyes turning red with anger, as we take one final look at them before we fade out for good.*

[Guest Zack Malibu]

PIMPIN' THE PROPPAGE TO:

 

PK

Mad Matt

Axel

IDRM

Zack Malibu

Shattered Dreams

Popick

Ted Weddy

 

*note*SpiderPoet was unable to get his segments involving Crystal, The Goblin, Black Widow in before the show went up. There will be a match between Crystal and Black Widow on Aggression this week, so stay tuned!*