Guest Ripper Report post Posted July 21, 2003 Well, if you know about it and have no problem with it, it isn't really cheating. Its like playing the handicap kid in basketball and he travels. Everyone KNOWS he did it but we let it slide so he isn't cheating....where the fuck did that analogy come from? In TSA's situation, he was married so how the hell did she cheat on someone who wasn't her's anyway(I think he was married...right??) I will say it like this. If your child comes up and slaps you and you do nothing but say, don't do that and he does it again and again and all you say is don't do that...well...he's gonna keep slapping you. We stop doing things due to the reprecussions. If you can cheat on your wife/husband and he just takes it and does nothing, why WOULDN'T you do it again. Unless it starts hurting them somehow they will keep doing it. thats where the once a cheater always a cheater thing comes from. Its more like once they cheat on YOU they will always cheat on YOU if you let them. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Texas Small Arms 09 Report post Posted July 21, 2003 To answer your question Ripper, I did not know he was married. See his wife was in New York and he was down here on business. He had every intention on still being with her after his work here was completed. He told me that he was single and was looking for a relationship. It wasn't until my 19th birthday, when he was out of town (in New York no less) and his father told me what the hell was going on. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Crucifixio Jones Report post Posted July 22, 2003 (edited) You know TSA, you can make up as many excuses and tell as many sob stories as you want. You can rationalize that he deserved it for whatever he put you through, you can cry til the cows come home and never admit any wrongdoing and when you do admit it, I'm sure you'll just go back to all the rationalizing you did the first time around, never taking responsibility or admitting total guilt for YOUR actions. But you're still a hypocrite for saying "once a cheater, always a cheater" when you've cheated yourself and insisting that people can't change, when you yourself claim to have done it. Period. You can't defend that and to try is to be a typical woman and you prove it by making an ass of yourself in here for all of us to see by trying to talk your way out of it. "He deserved it." "I had my reasons." "I was pissed off." "I had been cheated on and lied to too many times before." Whatever. How's this different from anyone else's life? But somehow you feel these are enough to give you a pass in your situation? Why, because you feel YOU deserve forgiveness and no one else does? Because you were provoked to cheat and everyone else are just horny bastards? Wake up and join the rest of us in the real world, honey. Please come up with more excuses on how your situation was "different" and somehow warranted the cheating like a good woman always does, because I'm sure that'll be your reply. You guys never admit that you were COMPLETELY wrong, there's always some other underlying emotional bullshit going on that I suppose we're supposed to understand and forgive you for; like you say this guy "deserved" it (he somehow deserved you being stupid enough to give your body to someone else...I bet he's SORRY NOW!). The bottom line it's still just excuses. But to be fair, I will say that I won't even consider what you did to be cheating. You can't cheat on a married man. You weren't ever truly in a relationship with him if he was married. He wasn't yours, he belonged to someone else already. He was cheating on his wife with YOU, not the other way around; you were just being stupid. He wasn't cheating on you. So going out and sleeping with someone because a married man was cheating on his wife with you is about 10x as stupid as cheating on someone you were actually exclusively involved with. You think that married guy gave a damn? Dumb cooze. "Once a cheater, always a cheater" you say, huh? A blanket statement that applies to everyone but YOU because I guess your situation and circumstances were "special." You're "special", alright. Short bus special. Edited July 22, 2003 by Crucifixio Jones Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Mr. Slim Citrus Report post Posted July 24, 2003 Well, if you know about it and have no problem with it, it isn't really cheating. Its like playing the handicap kid in basketball and he travels. Everyone KNOWS he did it but we let it slide so he isn't cheating....where the fuck did that analogy come from? "To call a man out for lying is like playing basketball with a retarded kid, and calling him for double dribble. You got to let some shit slide! You just gotta let some shit slide!" - Chris Rock, Bigger and Blacker Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Agent of Oblivion Report post Posted July 24, 2003 When someone cheats on you, why do some people feel inclined to just go find someone and cheat right back, on the original cheating party? Because revenge is fucking sweet, that's why. Why sit there and take heartache like a victim when you can just make them feel ten times worse, and vindicate yourself? Vengeance is not childish. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Raiden Report post Posted July 24, 2003 ... Vengeance is not childish. Sure it isn't... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Bruiser Chong Report post Posted July 24, 2003 When someone cheats on you, why do some people feel inclined to just go find someone and cheat right back, on the original cheating party? Because revenge is fucking sweet, that's why. Why sit there and take heartache like a victim when you can just make them feel ten times worse, and vindicate yourself? Vengeance is not childish. If they cheated on you in the first place, who's to say that they're going to be heartbroken that you've gone and cheated on them? They cheated first, is that to say that for some reason they'll sit around feeling heartache while you didn't? And cheating for revenge in most cases would just give you that feeling where you try to convince yourself that you're happy, all the while, feeling the pain from being cheated on. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest The Grand Pubah of 1620 Report post Posted July 24, 2003 If they cheated on you in the first place, who's to say that they're going to be heartbroken that you've gone and cheated on them? They cheated first, is that to say that for some reason they'll sit around feeling heartache while you didn't? And cheating for revenge in most cases would just give you that feeling where you try to convince yourself that you're happy, all the while, feeling the pain from being cheated on. Only for those people who are week minded and soft. Anyone with any guts could easily get revenge and sleep just fine at night. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Bruiser Chong Report post Posted July 24, 2003 I didn't say they couldn't, I said that in most cases, cheating for revenge isn't going to make you truly happy. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest cobainwasmurdered Report post Posted July 24, 2003 If they cheated on you in the first place, who's to say that they're going to be heartbroken that you've gone and cheated on them? They cheated first, is that to say that for some reason they'll sit around feeling heartache while you didn't? And cheating for revenge in most cases would just give you that feeling where you try to convince yourself that you're happy, all the while, feeling the pain from being cheated on. Only for those people who are week minded and soft. Anyone with any guts could easily get revenge and sleep just fine at night. anyone with no morals or ethics perhaps. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ripper Report post Posted July 24, 2003 If they cheated on you in the first place, who's to say that they're going to be heartbroken that you've gone and cheated on them? They cheated first, is that to say that for some reason they'll sit around feeling heartache while you didn't? And cheating for revenge in most cases would just give you that feeling where you try to convince yourself that you're happy, all the while, feeling the pain from being cheated on. Only for those people who are week minded and soft. Anyone with any guts could easily get revenge and sleep just fine at night. I think what he meant is that if they are week minded, they can't remember what they did for a week and can sleep fine. Thats all. I got your back Johnson. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Retro Rob Report post Posted July 24, 2003 If they cheated on you in the first place, who's to say that they're going to be heartbroken that you've gone and cheated on them? They cheated first, is that to say that for some reason they'll sit around feeling heartache while you didn't? And cheating for revenge in most cases would just give you that feeling where you try to convince yourself that you're happy, all the while, feeling the pain from being cheated on. Only for those people who are week minded and soft. Anyone with any guts could easily get revenge and sleep just fine at night. How fucking stupid are you? Two wrongs don't make a right. Instead of looking for revenge why not do the right thing and face the problem head on by I don't know... TALKING IT OUT? For some reason I think that would accomplish more than doing to your significant other exactly what they did to you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ripper Report post Posted July 24, 2003 If they cheated on you in the first place, who's to say that they're going to be heartbroken that you've gone and cheated on them? They cheated first, is that to say that for some reason they'll sit around feeling heartache while you didn't? And cheating for revenge in most cases would just give you that feeling where you try to convince yourself that you're happy, all the while, feeling the pain from being cheated on. Only for those people who are week minded and soft. Anyone with any guts could easily get revenge and sleep just fine at night. How fucking stupid are you? Two wrongs don't make a right. Instead of looking for revenge why not do the right thing and face the problem head on by I don't know... TALKING IT OUT? For some reason I think that would accomplish more than doing to your significant other exactly what they did to you. How stupid is he? Dude, that is one of his more brainy post. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Retro Rob Report post Posted July 24, 2003 How stupid is he? Dude, that is one of his more brainy post. He DID use a 7 letter word. I'll give him that. However "week" counteracts that success. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest The Grand Pubah of 1620 Report post Posted July 25, 2003 Who is the Judge and who is the Jury here, so I know who to tell to go to hell? Actually CWM sumed it up much better then I did, thanks! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rendclaw 0 Report post Posted July 25, 2003 CC: You never have had a boyfriend? I'm more than a touch surprised by that. TRITEC: You and I would get along very well in a relationship, as I feel the same way for the most part. Cheating for revenge to me just cheapens the relationship even further. End the relationship, talk it out, whatever it takes, but just cheating for revenge ends up hurting the person who was cheated on even worse... I am not judging you in any way, TSA, just giving my own take on it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest SP-1 Report post Posted July 25, 2003 I fail to see how there is vindication in "cheating for revenge". The only thing you do is lower yourself to someone else's standards, and it seems the mindset is, "Ha! I can do it too . . . and be better!" since you're trying to "outdo" the original sin, as it were. Tell him he's wrong, it's over, and move on. It really is that simple. The pain goes away sooner or later, unless you decide to trap it in your heart and dwell on it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rendclaw 0 Report post Posted July 25, 2003 That's one of those things that people do when they're upset at their boyfriend/girlfriend for cheating... there is not much true though behind it, its just a knee-jerk reaction... Human nature as well... Share this post Link to post Share on other sites