Wrestlemania Review

[Guest AWCUK]

Wrestlemania

Preview

In 1985, Vince McMahon’s vision of a sports entertainment event of the century would revolutionize wrestling, became the reality of the first Wrestlemania in New York City’s Madison Square Garden. The festive event featured celebrities from both the film and sports worlds, including Liberace, New York Yankees manager Billy Martin and rocker Cyndi Lauper. That night legendary Hall of Famer late Andre the Giant took on Big John Studd for $15,000 and pride in a bodyslam challenge. In the main event, television and movie star Mr. T and Hulk Hogan battled Rowdy Roddy Piper and “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff!

 

Live from New York, New York

March 31, 1985.

Your hosts are Jesse “The Body” Ventura and Gorilla Monsoon

We start with an introduction from Vincent Kennedy McMahon, who runs down the card, with the aid of the futuristic picture with no background The WWE production values where definitely in the toilet until Main Event came along.

Gene Okerlund sings the national anthem, being British it does not float my boat, but I think that even Stephanie could sing better than him.

Opening match: Tito Santana v. The Executioner.

The Executioner is Buddy Rose in a mask and making the generic heel gestures. Apparently, he’s undefeated in the company. Headlock by the Executioner, with Santana sending him into the ropes, whilst starting a criss-cross, Tito drops down, backdrops him and dropkicks the Executioner to the outside. They lock-up and Tito gains the advantage with a side-headlock, which he holds while sling-shotting off the top rope to take him down, getting a 2 count. Tito continues with the headlock until kicks to the left knee cause him to release the hold. Tito with punches to the head and throws the Executioner’s head into the canvas. The Executioner retreats to the corner and changes the momentum as he catches Tito with a kick to the stomach, Tito runs off the ropes but is caught with a knee to the mid-section. The Executioner works the leg with a step over toehold, which is due to the fact that Greg Valentine injured the leg in 1984, Tito kicks of the hold. Executioner still attempts to attack the knee until Tito fends him off with shots. Tito has him reeling with punches and goes for a piledriver, but it is reversed with a back body drop. Executioner with a scoop slam and climbs the top rope, but he is stroke with Flair syndrome and is slammed from the top. Santana with a bodysplash, which is countered with, raised knees. Executioner puts Santana leg on the rope, but Tito sends Executioner flying out of the ring. Tito places Executioner back in the ring with a body slam and nails with a flying forearm (the Flying Jalapeno), which knocks him out, but Tito locks in the Figure Four Leglock for the submission.

Time: 4:48

Heat: 5/10

Storyline: 6/10

Wrestling: 6/10

Average: 6/10

 

SD Jones v. King Kong Bundy (w/ Jimmy Hart).

When the bell rings, SD Jones runs off the ropes to try and attack Bundy, but is caught in a bear hug and is rammed hard into the corner, Bundy then avalanches him in the corner and splashing him for the finish (drawing ooo’s from the crowd which never happens nowadays for a splash). The time on my watch is 23 seconds but the WWE’ watch must have magically stopped at 9 seconds.

Time: 0: 23

Heat: 7/10

Storyline: 7/10

Wrestling: 1/10

Average: 5/10

 

Matt Borne v. Ricky Steamboat.

Borne is the original Doink The Clown, which seems weird when you look at him here with long bleach blonde hair and black beard. This is one of Steamboats first matches in the WWE after coming from the NWA and has mainly being tagging with Jimmy Snuka as the South Pacific Connection, giving him some residual heat. Borne locks up with Steamboat in a collar and elbow tie-up, whilst Jesse says that Borne is a second-generation wrestler as his father is ‘Tough’ Tony Borne. They criss-cross in the ropes and Steamboat leapfrogs Borne twice and attempts a chop, but Borne hangs onto the ropes. Borne then charges Steamboat who meets him with a chop. Steamboat snapmares Borne into a chinlock, which Borne fights out of. Steamboat with a headlock that he synchs on tight, Borne attempts a backdrop suplex, but Steamboats flips out and re-applies the headlock, where again Borne tries a backdrop suplex but Steamboat flips out and gives Borne a delayed atomic drop, which makes Borne do into Lanny Poffo oversell, whilst Steamboat works the neck again by re-applying the headlock. This time Borne counters with a stiff inverted atomic drop and a knee lift to the face, then forearms him into the corner. Borne whips Steamboat into the opposing corner and charges, but Steamboat counters with a headscissors, and a kick to the head, allowing him to nail a karate chop from the second rope and Steamboat chops him again to the mat. Steamboat continues the punishment to the neck and throat with the headlock again, which evolves into a front-face lock, but borne pushes him into the corner and feigns a clean break, but gives him 2 knees to the gut and a Steiner (sloppy) belly to belly suplex and a snap suplex for a 1 as he didn’t hook the leg. Both get off the canvas and its Steamboat’s chops against Borne’s forearms, Steamboat wins the exchange, knocking Borne to the canvas. Steamboat with a backdrop and a reverse neckbreaker, leading to a running karate chop to the neck and a knee drop in quick succession, giving a 2 count. Borne with an eye rake and Steamboat is whipped into the ropes, but nails Borne with a flying punch and ascend the turnbuckle to hit a flying bodypress for the victory

Time: 4:35

Heat: 5/10

Storyline: 7/10

Wrestling: 7/10

Average: 7/10

 

Brutus Beefcake (w/ Johnny V) v. David Sammartino (w/ Bruno Sammartino)

Bruno and thus David get a standing ovation from MSG, as Bruno was and is a MSG and WWE legend, who had recently retired. Brutus and Johnny apparently psych David out as they stall. David and Brutus lock up in a collar and elbow tie-up, when Brutus over powers David and throws him into the corner. Brutus gives him a break, but as David tries to lock up again, Brutus struts away. David with another lock-up, and pushes Brutus into the corner, he charges out, but is taken down by a drop-toe hold. Another lock-up leads to David gaining a back lock-up, which is reversed and Brutus with an amateur takedown to the mat, David fakes out of the hold, leading to Brutus bailing to the outside for a breather. Another lock-up gives David a hammerlock, when he trips the leg and takes a front face lock, with him rubbing Brutus’ face into the mat until Brutus finds the ropes, and on the break argues with the referee for absolutely no reason. They lock-up again and David finds an arm-ringer that is broken with a rake to the eyes and a slam by Beefcake. But David holds onto the armbar and delivers a knee to the exposed bicep. A tie-up and a headlock by Beefcake, which is taken down to the mat, David fights out and whips Brutus into the ropes, but Brutus with a shoulder knock down. Brutus continues to run the ropes, David tries a hip-toss that is reversed by Brutus into one of his own, but David flicks out his legs into Brutus’ face. David with a drop toehold and into a double toehold (or Haas of Pain). David changes the move to an ankle twist, but Brutus kicks out of it. But David with a leg trip and back to the ankle twist and evolutes into a spinning toehold, then to basic knee to the leg, this is broken up with Brutus raking the metal on his glove in David’s eyes, Brutus with forearms and then a back body drop. Brutus with elbows to the head and a bodyslam, Brutus with the ‘heavy artillery’ forearms to the chest and jaw. Brutus continues to pound on the back and this leads to a nasty elbow in the corner, Brutus whipping him in the corner and continues to beat David down with elbows, chokes and knees to the gut. Brutus with a whip to the corner, which is reversed by David, whip hits him with a back body drop. Brutus back in control with shots to the head, but David rallies back with punches to the stomach, and turns the tide with an European uppercut and a vicious knee to the head. David struggles to get him up for a vertical suplex, but it gets 2. Brutus headbutts him in the solar plexus and throws him through the middle rope. This gives Johnny V an opportunity to bodyslam David on the concrete floor, causing Bruno to attack Johnny, throwing him in the ring and hammering way in the corner before Brutus attacks from behind. Then David enters the ring nailing Beefcake, the 4 now brawl and the Sammartinos clear the ring of the heels, whilst the referee throws out the match as a double disqualification.

Time: 11: 40

Heat: 8/10

Storyline: 3/10

Wrestling: 6/10

Average: 6/10

 

INTERMISSION:

COMING SOON

WRESTLEMANIA 2 - 3 CITIES, 2 GOOD MATCHES, 1 RANT 1/08/03

WRESTLEMANIA 3 – THE BEST THING OUT OF DETROIT SINCE DIESEL TBC

 

Intercontinental title: Greg Valentine (w/ Jimmy Hart) v. Junkyard Dog.

JYD tries to intimate Valentine by faking punching him, but ‘schuking’ and jiving. JYD starts off with a tie-up, followed by an arm ringer, whilst continually adding the leverage by twisting the arm. JYP continues to punch and headbutt the exposed arm, Valentine fights out of the hold and whips JYD into the ropes trying a big boot. The foot is caught by JYD who spins him around and knocks him down with a big right hand, Valentine retreats to the corner and JYD motions for him to come on and fight, but Valentine takes his time, a lock up which Greg turns into a knee to the gut and a knockdown shot to the back of the head. Valentine with a telegraphed forearm misses and JYD barks in his face, until Valentine rolls out of dodge. A test of strength takes place with Valentine reversing the grip into an arm ringer, tying up his hands giving Greg 2 free shots to the head, knocking JYD to the mat. Elbow to the knee, a knee strain, kicks to the hamstring and a leg lock soften the leg of JYD, stomps to the knee hinder The Dogs movement, The Hammer continues to stretch out the groin and attempts a figure four leglock, but JYD pushes him off. JYD gets to his feet, they exchange blows and JYD wins that, as begins to headbutt Valentine but holds onto the hair so he goes nowhere, and finally headbutts him to the ground. Jimmy Hart gets on the apron taking exception to the holding of the hair, JYD grabs a hold of Hart, but moves just when Valentine attacks, knocking the two together sending Hart crashing headfirst to the floor. The crowd erupts sensing the end; JYD continues the punishment, pounding The Hammer with punches and headbutts, sending him into the corner, before he rakes the eyes of The Dog. This causes JYD to lose his bearing, allowing Valentine to take down his legs and roll him up in the Flair pin for the win.

However as Hart and Valentine celebrate the victory, Tito Santana comes to ringside and tells the ref what happened at the end of the match, causing the referee to restart the match, this causes Valentine to be counted out, giving JYD the victory but not the belt, Greg tries to re-enter the ring, but Hart restrains him from doing so.

Time: 6:00

Heat: 7/10

Storyline: 7/10

Wrestling: 6/10

Average: 7/10

 

WWF Tag team title: Barry Windham & Mike Rotundo (w/ Lou Albano) v. Iron Sheik & Nikolai Volkoff (w/ Classy Freddie Blassie)

If this were happening today, it would be like Kane and RVD facing La Resistance for the Tag Team Championship (and now you know the ending). Volkoff sings the Soviet National Anthem (that gimmick would never work today) and the fans throw rubbish into the ring to show their adoration for the USSR. The commentators say that both foreigners competed for their countries at the Olympic games, but fail to mention that Sheik actually trained the US wrestling team at the 1976 games. Rotundo and the Iron Sheik begin the bout, they lock up and Sheik gets a headlock, which he synchs in tight, Rotundo breaks it by pushing Sheik into the ropes, but he comes back with a shoulder block. They continue running the ropes, as Rotundo out-thinks Sheik and gives him a hiptoss, dropkick and delayed bodyslam. Whilst staggering from those shots, Windham nails The Sheik as he wondered into the wrong corner. Rotundo with a headlock takedown, which The Sheik cradles with the tights for 2, back to the headlock, when Rotundo tags in Windham, who delvers a top rope elbow to the back of The Sheik’s neck after being exposed in the headlock. Windham with a legdrop to the stomach and a headlock. His headlock gets moved into team evil foreigners corner, where Nikolai holds Windham breaking the headlock, but The Sheik attempts a dropkick when Windham moves, making him nail Nikolai by mistake. But the US Express fail to capitalise on the advantage as Windham backs off and The Sheik tags in Volkoff, whilst Barry tags in Rotundo. Rotundo and Nikolai feel each other out, and Rotundo whips Nikolai into the ropes and nails him with a standing elbow and then an elbowdrop, gaining a 1 count. Rotundo then rings the arm, when he tags Windham into the match, who hits a tope rope double axehandle onto the shoulder, and continues ringing Nikolai’s arm. Windham then tags Rotundo back in and he nails a top rope double axehandle on the shoulder of Volkoff. Rotundo holds an arm bar until Volkoff pulls the hair causing a release, allowing Nikolai to club the chest of Rotundo; he then throws Rotundo into the pointed ends of The Sheiks boots. Sheik tags in and whips in Rotundo, who takes a back body drop and an elbow drop for 2. A gutwrench suplex then follows for 2, he then tries a suplex, but its reversed into suplex by Rotundo. Nikolai tags in and stomps down Rotundo and hits a stungun on him, following that up with a hammerlock but this reversed by Rotundo into his version of a hammerlock, Volkoff powers out and sends Rotundo into the ropes, who sunset flips Nikolai for 2. Nikolai kicks him down and whips him into the ropes and nails a knee to the gut, before returning to nail Rotundo’s head with big boots. He takes him over to his teams corner and hits him off The Sheiks boots before making the tag, Sheik nails him with a boot and locks in abdominal stretch to put pressure on the stomach of Rotundo, Rotundo comes back with a hiptoss to break the hold, Rotundo goes for an elbow but misses, both men crawl to their respective corner, Volkoff gets the tag and so does Windham, he nails Volkoff repeatedly, whips him into the ropes and he meets him with a big dropkick. Windham keeps on him hitting with all he has, Nickolai backs off into the corner, but Windham nails his patented running bulldog, the cover 1, 2, The Sheik breaks up the pin with a shot to the head. Rotundo comes into the ring to take care of The Sheik; he dropkicks him out of the ring. The US Express has Nickolai in the middle of the ring, as Windham keeps hitting Volkoff with his punches, he signals for another bulldog, but as the referee is busy with getting Rotundo out of the ring, The Iron Sheik nails Windham with Blassie’s cane and Sheik gets the pin from that shot. The Iron Shiek accepts the belts by getting on the microphone and insulting America, La Resistance wishes they could draw the heat he’s getting.

Time: 6:56

Heat: 10/10

Storyline: 5/10

Wrestling: 6/10

Average: 7/10

Backstage, Mean Gene grabs a word with the new champs, and questions them about their controversial win, but Blassie just admonishes him for being stupid and denies any wrong doing on their part. While, The Iron Sheik says that tonight, they proved that Iran and USSR were better than America.

 

Lord Alfred Hayes recaps the events leading to the bodyslam challenge; it’s basically a feud over who’s the real giant, well that would obviously be the tallest one…

Mean Gene is in the locker room with Studd and Bobby Heenan, they talk a lot and say 2 things of interest, the money was bait to rid wrestling of Andre and Studd will not lose. But, I could listen Heenan ramble all day.

Bodyslam challenge: Big John Studd (w/Bobby Heenan) v. Andre the Giant.

The conditions for this match are if Studd slams Andre, Andre must retire from professional wrestling and if Andre slams Studd, Studd must give Andre $15000. Studd blindsides Andre with blows to the back, stomach and chest, trying to wear the big man down. Studd continues to work away, but Andre fights back with chops to Studd’s chest. Andre headbutts Studd out of the ring, giving him time to consult with his manager and regain his composure. He slowly re-enters and is immediately caught in a choke in the corner, which Andre repeatedly holds on him. Andre releases the hold and hits in the stomach, nails a knee lift and punches him in the face. Andre pushes Studd into the corner and squashes him in the corner; he continues to hit Studd until Studd hits a low blow and tries to slam Andre, but nothings happening. Andre knees out of Studd’s grip, chops him in the chest and bearhugs him. Studd eventually elbows out of his grip, but is meet with a modified sleeper on Studd. He hits a couple of his right hands and knocks him to the mat with a headbutt. Studd runs the ropes and Andre lowers his head for a back body drop, but Studd kicks him in the head, but Andre isn’t as stupid as all the other wrestlers who do that, as it was a trap since he catches the boot and nails him again. Studd gets rammed into the corner again and Andre is weakening his legs as he kicks out his legs. Then Andre just picks up Studd and slams him for the match and the money. Andre then takes the money in the WWE bag and throws the $1 bills out into the crowd before Heenan steals the bag back and runs for his life.

Time: 5:53

Heat: 8/10

Storyline: 6/10

Wrestling: 2/10

Average: 5/10

Mean Gene is with Andre to get his views on his ‘wrestling’ match, but Andre’s accent and deep voice make his interviews unlistenable.

 

Lord Alfred recaps the women’s title match, but gets kissed by a passing Moolah and Leilani Kai; hey it’s better than getting kissed by Mae Young.

Mean Gene is in the ladies dressing room with Lauper and Wendi Richter, then with Moolah and Leliani Kai, well they were all terrible, Kai and Richter sounded so much like southern hicks you could not take them seriously and well Cyndi Laupter, proves one thing, hindsight is a cruel mistress.

WWF Ladies Title: Leilani Kai (w/ Fabulous Moolah) v. Wendi Richter (w/ Cyndi Lauper).

Cyndi really did stand the test of time, as I only know her as the punch line to 1980’s pop jokes. Anyway, they tie-up, but it degenerates into hair pulling by both women. Wendi is backed into the corner, Kai with a puch, which is blocked, and Wendi with one of her own, knocking Kai half way across the ring, Richter goes to work with a hammerlock after scooping her off her feet from a lock-up, she keeps applying pressure by forcing the twisted elbow into the canvas. Kai elbows out of the move and snapmares Richter over twice for a two count. Kai puts pressure on the arm, with alternating arm locks and arm-ringers, with occasional knees to the elbow. Wendi eventually fights back with punches, but Kai regains the momentum with forearms to the back. She pulls her by the hair into the corner and snapmares her over, she tries to choke her, but Wendi elbows her away, before she locks her in a blatant choke, then Richter locks in a headscissors to counter the choke. Kai pulls her off her breaking her lock, and then Wendi attempts a gut wrench takedown leading to pinfall attempt. Kai recovers with a snapmare and pulls the hair on the mat; Wendi whipped into the corner, Kai charges in but is meet with a boot to the face, leading to a 2 count. Richter charges at Kai pushing her into the ropes, Kai pushes Richter away causing her to fall through the ropes allowing Moolah to attack her. This causes Lauper to attack Moolah. Kai then returns to her attack on Wendi, whipping her into the ropes and nailing her with a big boot, Richter begins her fight back with punches to the stomach, before whipping Leliani into the ropes. She lifts Kai in a fireman’s carry before dropping her to the mat, she splashes her and receives a 2 count form a pin. Kai is thrown into the corner, but when Richter charges she is meet with lifted knees from Kai. Kai keeps on with the boots and gets a 2, a backbreaker gets 2 and a bodyslam floors Wendi. Kai goes to the top rope, she hits a flying body press, but Richter just rolls through and surprises her for the 3 count and the belt.

Time: 6:11

Heat: 7/10

Storyline: 5/10

Wrestling: 4/10

Average: 5/10

Lauper and Wendi give Mean Gene an interview and I don’t listen.

 

Mr. T & Hulk Hogan v. Roddy Piper & Paul Orndorff (w/ ‘Father Of Legend Killer’ Bob Orton)

Billy Martin is the guest ring announcer, Liberace is the guest time keeper, Muhammad Ali is the guest referee. Patterson is the real referee.

It looks like Orndorff and Hogan are going to start the match until Piper starts screaming at Orndorff to start the match, so Orndorff obliges and tags in Piper, then Mr. T starts doing the same to Hogan, so Hogan tags in Mr. T into the match. Mr. T and Piper size each other, and they head in a head to head Staredown, giving the Wrestlemania moment always used when recapping Wrestlemania 1. They slap each other on the face; they do so again to heighten the tension. Then an annoyed Piper takes Mr. T down to the mat, but T gives him the slip, and both return to their feet. They tie-up and T pushes Piper away, Piper charges but is lifted in a fireman’s carry and drops him onto the mat. Piper again charges at T pushing him back into Piper’s corner, as he gets worked over by the heels, Hogan charges to his rescue, triggering a 4 man brawl, then even Jimmy Snuka and Orton get involved in the ring, causing Ali to come inside the ring and restore order as only he can, sending the people to the outside of the ring. Piper and Orndorff say that they will walk out of the match, but Piper changes his mind and starts the match off again with Hogan, Hogan starts his offence with an atomic drop taking Piper down leading Hogan to knock Piper’s head off the canvas frequently. Piper and Hogan exchange eye rakes (which one is the heel), then Mr. T gets tagged in. Double whip into the ropes and a double clothesline drops Piper to the mat. Mr. T slams Piper, then hiptosses Orndorff, who tries to blindside him. He slams Piper again, before throwing Pipers head into Hogan’s boot. Hogan tags and a big boot knocks Piper over the ropes. Orndorff attacks Hogan from behind and knocking Hogan outside also. Whilst Pat stops Mr. T from helping Hogan, Piper nails Hogan with a steel chair to the back. Piper and Hogan are back in the ring and Piper rakes the eyes with the boot. Orndorff nails Hogan as he pushed into the wrong corner by Piper. Piper and Orndorff illegally attack Hogan making Mr. T try to interfere causing Patterson to stop T allowing Orndorff and Piper to continue attacking Hogan even hitting a double atomic drop on Hogan. Ali then troubleshoots this illegal double-teaming in the ring. Orndorff starts to wail on Hogan, and then Orndorff suplexes Hogan and Piper comes into the match. Piper nails Hogan with his patented boxing shots, and gets a 2 count. Orndorff enters the match and hits a top rope elbow to the Hogan’s neck. Orndorff continues the assault and nails a backbreaker then climbs to the top rope. A top rope elbow misses as Hogan dodges the move and Hogan tags in Mr .T, who rakes the eyes of both Piper and Orndorff. T then gets blindsided and Orndorff and Piper are in control. They put the boots to Mr. T. Eventually; Orndorff is left with T and grapples him on the mat. Piper comes into the match before locking on a front face lock. T rallies out of this hold and gets to tag Hogan, who nails Piper and Orndorff. A Double noggin knocker follows and Hogan attacks Orndorff. However, the momentum shifts when Orndorff hits a backdrop suplex. Piper tries to attack Hogan but is stopped by Patterson; this distraction lets Bob Orton in the ring. Although, at this time, Jimmy Snuka comes into the ring himself and stops Orton from being meddlesome in the match. Patterson throws Snuka out when this happens, and Orndorff locks in a tight full-nelson hold on Hogan. Piper comes into to hit Hogan but Mr. T stops him and attack each other in the corner of the ring. At this point, Bob Orton off the top rope to nail Hogan, but he telegraphed it, so Hogan moved out of the way, causing him to hit Orndorff with his cast. Hogan covers Orndorff and gets the victory. All the celebrities, Snuka and Hogan celebrate the vanquishing of the evil Piper and his gang, as they sign off the first Wrestlemania.

Time: 13:22

Heat: 10/10

Storyline: 6/10

Wrestling: 6/10

Average: 7/10

 

Event Summary

Segment Average: 6/10

Storyline Progression: 6/10

Commentary: 8/10

Event Average: 7/10

REASONS TO WATCH

§ Piper in his heel prime.

§ The genesis of sports entertainment

§ The special feeling of the event

 

REASONS NOT TO WATCH

§ The slow 1980’s style

§ The poor production values

§ The lack of stand out matches

 

Random Fact: My favourite wrestler on RAW is Steven Richards.

[Guest nWoScorpion]

This should be in the Smarks Krew folder. (Already commented on this on other forum)

[Guest Retro Rob]

Cool format that I haven't seen used very much... if at all. I tried ending my tape reviews the way you did for a while, but quickly forgot about it. I'd like to see you try some other shows to.

 

Next time though post it in the Smark Krew folder at the bottom of the board.

[Guest AWCUK]

Sorry, I did not know that I should have posted this in the other forum, I'll post in that forum from now on.

 

P.S. Wrestlemania 2 review should be up by Monday at the latest

[Guest BAR]

Nice review, always fun to read. For me personally though, you can't beat the old star ratings, everyone can relate and argue them.