Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 Cameras high above Niagara Falls welcome everyone watching at home to another edition of SJL Crimson…sponsored by Frost’s “Fuck Norway” Tours and the Annie Eclectic Dating Service for men and women but mostly women. Water Explosions catch the attention of all those non-wrestling fans walking the streets as a bit of pyro fires off into the illuminated sky of the Falls. The camera swings down to OUR FAVORITE ANNOUNCE TEAM~! as they prepare themselves for another fine show. Judge: What a spectacular beginning to Crimson…we almost took out a boat down there! We have tons of action planned for you…including Tommy Nguyen taking on Landon Maddix, a Todd Blessed TV Title Defense… Ejiro: …a match for a chance at the European Champion…a Falls Brawl~! … Annie: …and a main event six man tag match that definitely needs more chick power! Judge: But first…we are going to get a word from the European Champion…Bloodshed…or whatever he is calling himself these days… Ejiro: …what a weirdo… Funyon: Ladies and Gentlemen…please stand for YOUR European Champion….BLOOOOOOO… Suddenly Funyon’s mic goes dead and flames shot from the entranceway. Bloodshed walks into view, carrying a microphone and wearing a long robe, his left arm crooked for the moment. The SmarkTron comes to life and shows scenes from Wrath…with Craig McLennan dropping Bloodshed on his head and injuring his arm…and Bloodshed’s subsequent message…declaring himself to be “The Apostle”. The crowd is confused. Bloodshed waves his hand over the flames as he walks to the ring, and the flames die out. A close-up catches a smile on his face as he enters the ring…inaudibly telling Funyon to get out of the ring. With his hair in a ponytail he almost seems to be a completely different person…and with the message delivered on Wrath he very well could be a different person. Apostle: All of you out there…you are looking at The Answer. Kept in hiding by my own conscious ways…but now I have returned. Craig McLennan…Ebon…whoever you are. You have made a grave error in judgment. You have brought the past into the present where it does not belong. One night you blocked out my past and the way I was…but a few days ago it all came back to me. The Apostle resurrected…and your life will never be the same. The crowd seems taken aback by these words, as a stunned silence has fallen over them. I do not come here to PREACH~! I do not come here to SAVE~! I come here because years ago you took something that was near and dear to me…you took my soul and my life…and you destroyed it. You killed my soul……but even I never thought it would return like this. Your time has come…CRAIG… soon you will know the truth…and soon you will know the ANSWERS… You have stepped into a world where you can’t defend yourself. You have stepped into a world where the past means more than the future. You have stepped into a world where God doesn’t love you…and doesn’t care to know your name. You have stepped into my world… a world of entropy. Every action leading toward universal destruction. And you are right in the middle of it. …Enjoy your stay…because soon all will know the answers… The Apostle drops the mic and steps through the ropes…looking out to the crowd as he does. He drops down off the apron and begins walking slowly to the back…flames ripple to the sky every few moments as he walks off. Judge: Well that sure was strange…what do we call him now? Ejiro: Insane? Annie: I think it’s The Apostle you two…now get it right… Ejiro: Yes ma’am… *both men snicker and Annie belts Ejiro with a slap to the face* Ejiro: Owww… Judge: Alright…let’s not piss of the lesbian any more… Annie: if I could reach over there you’d be bleeding out your ass… Both Ejiro and Judge look stunned at Annie, but she just smiles and looks into the camera. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 Card: TV CONTENDERSHIP BROUHAHA Tommy Nguyen vs. Landon "La Cucaracha" Maddix Description: Each of these competitatators has won one match each. I think that win streaks are a funny thing, especially if one is undefeated. So, one person’s very short win streak is ended now, and the other will try to win some shiny gold. Rules: Standard singles match. TV TITLE DEFENSE Todd Royal© vs. Jay Morrison Description: Jay Morrison is a dirty mean nasty man, so he should fit in the JL very well. How far can he go? Here’s a shot at some shiny gold. Rules: Standard singles match. EURO CONTENDERSHIP English Dragon vs Tim Dillon Description: These two fought against each other in a tag match, with Dragon on the winning end. It’s momentum going into this contest, but with only himself to rely on, will Dillon have a disadvantage, or an advantage? Is there a third choice? Rules: Standard singles match. INTERESTING STIPULATION MATCH Hybrid vs "Canadian Thunder" Chris Trepanier vs Bloodshed vs Viktor Tarakanov Description: I’ve been accused by no one other than myself of booking boring singles and tga matches. So, I’m going to invent a stipulation here. We’re at Niagra Falls... let’s look at the rules. Rules: If you’re familiar with the Miami Mayhem match, this is pretty much the same thing. A wrestler is eliminated when he is thrown into Niagra falls. The match starts in the ring. I think that’s pretty simple. Maybe try and put your opponent in a barrel before throwing him over as to let him live. Don’t make anyone look TOO bad, if you weeeeeeel. On further inspection, I didn’t invent shit here. But it should be a fun write, and a fun read for me. SIX MAN TAG MAIN EVENT John Duran, Scott Solomon & Dominic Korgath vs Danny Conklin, Leo Breslin & Manson Description: When the world champion of a federation is also the leader of a powerful faction, that faction gains immeasurable power. I should know. John Duran sits at the top of the SJL, backed by Commissioner Raynor. The only way to defeat Urban Decay will be to band together. Can these three, who have had their licks against the foursome, overcome? Rules: Standard six man taggers. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 A shot of the magnificent view overlooking Niagara Falls greets us, as we return to SJL Crimson. The commentary team of ‘Judge Mental’, Annie Eclectic and Ejiro Fasaki sit at the announce table, just metres from the edge of Niagara Falls, ready to start off the wrestling section of the show. Judge- Welcome back to magnificent Niagara Falls, and back to SJL Crimson for our first match of the evening. And we kick it off with an important match in the careers of two fresh SJLers. The TV Title number one contendership is on the line, as Tommy Nguyen takes on Landon Maddix, both men unbeaten in their short SJL careers. Annie- Well guys, matches like this can really make or break a start to a career, and you can bet the intensity levels are going to be high here tonight. Ejiro- They should be…so lets just hope this kid Maddix doesn’t steal a win with some cheap roll-up like he did last week. “Creatures” by 311 begins to play, the song echoing around Niagara Falls as Tommy Nguyen walks out. The big screen specially erected for the show flashes up ‘Tommy Nguyen”, as a collection of orange, yellow and red pyros are set off around him. Some of the crowd begin applauding Tommy as walks down the aisle, enters the ring, and looks around at the abnormal site of a waterfall beside a wrestling ring. Suddenly the opening strains of Marilyn Manson’s “The Fight Song” ring out from the P.A System, as out hops Landon Maddix, a big smile on his face. Annie- This kid sure looks happy to be here. And after his win last week, who an blame him? He’s living his dream… Ejiro- Oh please. This is the SJL Annie…take the bleeding hearts crap elsewhere. Tagging hands with the fans, Maddix makes his way down the aisle, before going all the way around the ring, still tagging hands. Getting near the announce table, Maddix takes a detour and extends a hand to the commentators. Judge apprehensively tags Landon’s hand, only for his buddy Ejiro to pass on the offer. With a shrug, Landon moves over to Annie, and as she extends her hand Landon takes it and kisses it! He then turns and leaps on to the apron, as Ejiro has a big smile on his face suddenly. Ejiro- Ha…don’t tell me…don’t tell me this kid doesn’t know you’re a chi… Annie- I wouldn’t finish that sentence if I were you. Former tag champ or not, I wouldn’t hesitate in booting you right in the ba… Judge- EASY! Easy now…we’re on syndicated television here. Maddix enters the ring, and spins around with arms outstretched, as Tommy is watching all this from the corner. Eventually all the pomp and ceremony ends, and we’re ready for action. The fans settle back down in their seats, as Maddix and Tommy eventually drop into a readied stance. Both men move forward to lock up, only for Tommy to feint right and drive a knee to the gut. Taking advantage, Tommy locks on a side headlock, trying to wear down Landon early. Maddix moves Nguyen backwards, and hits a forearm to the side before pushing Tommy into the ropes. Tommy reels back for a clothesline, but Landon ducks and runs on. With both men running towards each other, they seem on a collision course, until Landon drops down. Nguyen jumps over Landon, and as Landon gets up Tommy is waiting with a superkick to the jaw. Landon retreats into the corner holding his jaw, as Nguyen is smiling slightly. Judge- Nice movement from Nguyen…kept light on his feet, and kept his head unlike Landon who looked a little confused. Ejiro- It’s like I said all last week. This kid is a rookie, and will make mistakes…but he’s also a cocky rookie, who tries to be too flash. And it bit him in the ass then. Tommy follows Landon to the corner, but Maddix grabs a hold of Tommy’s black pants and pulls Nguyen face first into the top turnbuckle. Tommy staggers back, as Landon pulls himself up and kicks him across the ribs. Maddix goes for another kick to the ribs, only for Nguyen to catch the leg and push Landon back to the corner. With a little smile, Tommy hits a right hand, quickly followed with a boot and another right…suddenly, Nguyen starts going crazy with a flurry of high impact blows in the corner! Maddix rebounds into the corner from every blow, before Tommy stops. The crowd are cheering for the explosion of offence by Tommy Nguyen, as he backs up and headbutts Maddix to finish off the flurry. Judge- An EXPLOSION of offence by Tommy Nguyen! He must have nailed fifteen or twenty various strikes from Tommy! Annie- At least twenty. He was moving so fast it was hard to tell. Maddix stumbles out of the corner as Tommy sidesteps him, so as he’s behind Landon. Grabbing Landon by the head, Tommy runs forward and attempts the running bulldog, but Maddix pushes him off at the last minute. Tommy crashes sternum first into the corner, knocking the wind out of him slightly. Slowly he staggers backwards, as Maddix suddenly dives into a forward roll, sending his heel crashing into the back of Tommy’s head. Nguyen falls forward, landing across the middle rope. Judge- There’s a Koppu Kick…and in perfect position for the Whiparound. Some of the crowd were obviously watching last week, and they know what’s coming… ‘La Cucaracha’ runs to the ropes, and charges towards Nguyen, grabs the top and middle ropes and swings around towards Tommy. Suddenly, at the last second, Nguyen ducks causing Landon to miss his move and crotch himself across the middle rope. Nguyen quickly gets back to his feet, and dropkicks Landon so he goes flying from his crotched position out to the lightly padded floor. Ejiro- See Judgey…the kid tried to be too flash again, and that’s what he gets. A nice little trip to the concrete. Judge- Well when it hits, the Whiparound is an effective move… Ejiro- But when it DOESN’T…the kid looks like an ass. And he gets hurt. When you try and play to the crowd too often, you get what you deserve. Tommy follows to the outside, as Landon is trying to haul himself up. Grabbing him from behind, Nguyen uses the slight strength advantage to press Landon above his head and drop him face first across the announce table at ringside! Maddix is back down on the floor, as Tommy drags him to his feet and throws him back into the ring. Nguyen rolls in after, before grabbing a handful of Maddix’s blond hair and pulls him up. Carelessly throwing Landon’s arm over the neck, Tommy pops the hips and takes Landon over with a snap suplex. He reflexes up on impact, but Tommy pulls him down and holds down the shoulders… …ONE… ...TWO… ...TH… Landon kicks out, throwing up both his shoulders simultaneously. Not fazed, Nguyen immediately pulls Maddix back up and places his foot on Landon’s right thigh, driving down until Landon drops to one knee from the pressure. From there, Tommy hits a series of knees to the gut and chest of Landon, before backing up and waiting. Maddix slowly tries to get up, but is stopped in his tracks as Tommy leaps towards him, hooking Landon’s head with his leg and driving him down with a ‘Fame-Asser’. Judge- Tommy’s planning ahead here, one or two moves at a time. It’s almost like a game of chess for him. Annie- I bet Vladimir Kramnik’s never Fame-Assered someone though… The obscure name leaves a clueless Ejiro and Judge in silence, as meanwhile Tommy goes for another cover… …ONE… …TWO… …THR… KICKOUT! Still seeming unfazed, Tommy lands a stiff kick to the ribs of the kneeling Landon Maddix. Slowly Nguyen pulls Landon up before he can crumple to the mat, and hits another knee. Tommy then places Landon’s head between his legs, and hoists him up for a powerbomb. Flapping his arms frantically, Landon tries to escape…and suddenly falls back, hitting a gorgeous Hurricanrana!!! Judge- Beautiful counter there by Landon Maddix, and it’s got the crowd on it’s feet again. Both men are down as referee Matthew Kivel checks both men’s levels of consciousness. Before he can even start a count though, Tommy is back up to his feet. Landon is up too, and running towards Nguyen, but is intercepted with a stiff clothesline. Going back to the ribs of Maddix as he worked on earlier, Tommy locks on a bridged bow and arrow lock. Wrenching back, Tommy tries to further weaken the back, as some of the crowd is beginning to clap. Slowly, more and more of the crowd get involved in trying to help Landon regain the advantage. Annie- Well, seems like the crowd’s finally stopped looking at the water and rocks and stuff…and realised there’s a wrestling match in front of them. Ejiro- Yeah…I mean after all, it is ONLY Niagara Falls. Only one of the top tourist attractions in the world. Annie- But this is the SJL… Before Ejiro or Annie can say anymore, Landon is beginning to fight the move. With not many options in front of him, Landon starts to reach out towards the ropes, but sensing Landon is starting to struggle, Tommy cuts his losses and decides to break the hold. Judge- That may have been a mistake right there. Landon didn’t seem able to find an escape, but…I guess Tommy let him up for a reason. Nguyen starts up with a series of elbows across the back of Landon as he tries to get up, only slowing him down momentarily. As he gets back up, Landon is grabbed by the hand by Tommy and irish whipped to the ropes. Nguyen catches him coming back and attempts to tilt a whirl Landon, presumably into a backbreaker. The move doesn’t get that far though, as Maddix manages to counter with a flying headscissors. Tommy looks a little taken aback by Landon’s sudden counter, as Landon is back up too. Both men charge at each other, and Maddix brushes by Tommy. He rebounds back, but Nguyen pushes him on to the ropes, and runs on himself. Landon sees Tommy coming and commando rolls spectacularly up and over a kitchen sink attempt. Nguyen stops, and runs again, ducking under a wild knifedge chop in the process. As Tommy runs on, Landon takes a backstep, and runs at him again. Nguyen holds out his arm for a clothesline a little too early, allowing Landon to jump into a crucifix…or not, as he swings out and nails a DDT!!! The crowd break out into a round of applause as both men are down following this exchange. Judge- Incredible! Both men matching the other for speed, and in the end Landon nails the ‘Nose Job’ DDT. Ejiro- Well…I’m not one to give out praise to these flashy kids…but that was energetic I guess. Annie- Ah…I see compliments about your non buddies are hard to come by Eji. Landon gets back to his feet first, and Tommy is not far behind him. Maddix is waiting though, and hits a couple of boots to the gut. Grabbing Tommy’s left arm, Landon whips Tommy into the top right corner from the camera’s view. He then charges towards Nguyen and hits a crossbody in the corner. Tommy looks surprisingly unpained from 206 pounds crashing into him…and as he walks out of the corner he has Landon in his arms. Tommy takes a few steps from out of the corner, and throws Landon over his head with a fallaway slam, ‘La Cucaracha’ landing back first on the top turnbuckle!!! A grimace emerges on his face, as Tommy adjusts him on the top rope, so he is sat facing into the ring. Tommy then follows up, and goes to the middle rope himself. Ejiro- Don’t tell me this guy is gonna try and be flash too… Getting to the top rope, Tommy jumps up and hooks Landon’s head in between his legs taking him down with a super hurricanrana!!! Landon crashes back first and clutches his ribs instantly on impact as Nguyen goes for the cover… …ONE… …TWO… …THR… …E… TWO COUNT!!! Landon shoots the shoulder up, to cheers from some sections of the crowd. Maddix immediately tries to get back up, but is met with jumping legdrop, connecting perfectly. Another couple of kicks rain down on Landon’s ribs before, seeing that Landon is suitably hurt, begins to climb to the top rope. Tommy seems a little slow getting to the top, and it gives time for Landon to get back up. He too looks a little slow, as he climbs to the middle rope and hits a couple of fists to the gut of Nguyen. Landon steadies himself before going to the top rope. Judge- Uh oh…here comes a receipt. Landon’s going for a little payback here… Ejiro- By stealing the move from the guy? Judge- It’s a common move Ejiro. I wouldn’t call it stealing…but I guess it may be a psychological move. Grabbing the hair of Tommy, Landon uses him as a balance to get to the top rope. Taking a little time to look out at the crowd, and understandably distracted by the sights in front of him, Landon stops for long enough for Tommy to shove Landon off the ropes. Somehow, Landon manages to land on his feet, and as Tommy begins to steady himself on the top rope Landon springboards off the middle rope, and nails a version of a Shining Wizard ON THE TOP ROPE!!! The crowd let out a collective ‘OOHHH!!!’ as Tommy goes crashing over the top rope, and smacks hard on the concrete on landing!!! Annie- Awesome move… Judge- Oh man, Tommy Nguyen may be hurt from both the blow to the back of the head and from the landing. This concrete is here for people to stand on, not for people to crash fifteen feet onto! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! HOLY SHIT! Landon stands still, centre ring, soaking up the cheers and chants from the crowd as Tommy is out cold on the outside. Eventually Maddix breaks himself away from the moment, and rolls out of the ring after Tommy. Near unconscious from the fall, Nguyen is obviously dead weight as Landon has trouble lifting him back up. Slowly he does, and rolls him into the ring, all the while Tommy not moving. Judge- This one is over…Landon just needs to make a cover and it’s over. Maddix rolls back into the ring, and hooks the near leg for the cover… …ONE… …TWO… …THR… …E… FOOTONTHEROPES!!!!! The crowd counting along stop with a combined sound of disbelief, as Landon is just as shocked. Annie- That was just instinctive there. There was no way Tommy Nguyen could have kicked out from that tumble to the floor. Judge- I’m shocked he even got a foot on the rope…and so too is Landon Maddix, who must have thought he had earned the TV Title number one contendership right there! Tommy is still hardly moving, laid out with his left foot draped over the bottom rope. Grabbing a handful of hair, and another handful of tights, Maddix begins to pull Tommy up to his feet. The youngster brings Tommy right up to his feet, with Tommy so out of energy he is leant against Maddix. Landon hooks his arms under Nguyen’s hands and pushes him off, as Tommy collapses back against the ropes. Judge- Tommy is out on his feet…this is almost over, Landon just needs to hit one more big move and he’s the number one contender for the TV Title. Reeling back with his right hand, Maddix fires a stiff knifedge chop to the chest, eliciting a ‘WHOO!’ from the crowd. Maddix fires a second chop, again receiving a ‘WHOO!’ as it connects with Tommy’s chest. These shots only serve to weaken Nguyen more, as he becomes more and more reliant on the ropes to stay up. Landon goes to irish whip Tommy across the ring, but the exhaustion causes Tommy to stop halfway and fall to his knees. Thinking quickly Landon backs up and charges towards Nguyen, but with seemingly his last roll of the dice Tommy dives forward with a spinning elbow, connecting with Maddix’s jaw! Tommy’s last gasp effort brings a bout of respectful applause, as now both men are down on the mat. A few of the crowd are now even chanting for Tommy. Judge- It’s a test of stamina now for both men, who’s got the most left in the tank? Ejiro- Well they’ve both taken a lot of punishment, and with guys in just their second or third matches, they’re going to feel the pain more. Recovering from the elbow pretty quickly, Landon is up first as Tommy is still struggling to get back up. Running forwards, Landon suddenly leaves his feet and hits a snap legdrop to the back of Nguyen’s head to stop his progress. Again, Tommy attempts to get to his feet, and again Landon leaves his feet with a legdrop to the neck and head. This time Nguyen stays down for a little longer, but summons up all the energy he can, and begins to use the ropes to pull himself up. Maddix gives up on trying to keep Tommy down, and hops up to the middle rope before encouraging Nguyen up. Judge- This could very well be the end finally…if Landon manages to nail the Crash Landon, Nguyen will NOT be getting up. Finally getting to his feet, Tommy staggers over to the corner where Landon is waiting with a head and arm lock, ready for the Crash Landon. Springing off the middle rope, Landon twists both he and Nguyen around looking for the downward spiral part of the move, but in mid move Tommy manages to hook his left leg across Landon’s and with his leg hooked manages to drive Maddix down with an ‘STO’! Landon’s head and injured back hit the mat, as Tommy sits on his knees trying to regain his breath. Annie- You know, I think Nguyen may have been playing possum through that move. It’s almost like… Ejiro- Like the kid made another rookie mistake. Seriously, how many can this kid make and get away with? Judge- He may not get away with this one… Annie- Yeah, and you may not get away with interrupting me many more times! Eventually Tommy crawls over, and hooks both Landon’s legs, one with his arm and one with his legs as referee Matthew Kivel drops down to make the count… …ONE… …TWO… Ejiro- This is it!!! …THR… …E… KICKOUT BY MADDIX!!! The very divided crowd lets out a collection of a cheer and a boo, both men having gained some support from the fans during the match. Tommy still looks like he’s used his last bit of energy, but manages to get back to his feet and pull up Landon. Clutching his back, Maddix tries to fire a right hand, but Nguyen ducks and hits a forearm to the back. Landon collapses forwards, as Tommy begins to climb to the top rope. Maddix is down on the mat face first, not seeing Nguyen up on the top rope. Ejiro- See what the fans do…this guy shouldn’t be making this mistake, yet the crowd’s cheering is egging him on. Steadying himself, and breathing heavily to try and summon some more energy, Nguyen leaps forward, twisting around in the air 180 degrees… 360 degrees… a full four hundred and fifty degrees, into a senton bomb… LANDON MOVES!!! Tommy smashes into the mat as Maddix is already pulling himself up in the corner. Suddenly he drops to his knees…and takes Nguyen over into an Oklahoma roll. …ONE… Judge- This is how Landon won last week! …TWO… Ejiro- Ah no…he’s going to steal it again! …TH… Tommy rolls out, and then tries to lock a scissorslock on the arms of Landon, trying to clamp on Suicide Dreams!!! Before he can, Maddix again escapes and hits a version of an armdrag, from the floor. Both men get to their feet at the same time, and charge forward. Maddix catches the clothesline before it connect and spins into a hammerlock. Releasing the move slightly, Landon spins Nguyen around and goes for a clothesline of his own. Tommy ducks, and as Landon turns around Nguyen again charges but is caught running in into a suplex… …but in mid air Landon hooks the leg, and drives Tommy down head first into a vicious Fisherman’s BUSTER!!! The crowd pop for the offensive move, as Maddix rolls Tommy over into a cover… …OOONNNEEE… …TWWWOOO… …TH……RE……E!!! THREE!!! LANDON WINS! Judge- BEAUTIFUL MOVE!!! Both men threw everything they had at each other, and in the end it took a momentum assisted fisherman’s buster to end it. “The Fight Song” starts up again, as Landon has his arm raised in victory. Raising his other arm, Landon looks around the crowd who are cheering and applauding his efforts, before smiling and spinning around, soaking the experience up. Tommy rolls out of the ring, leaving beaten but with no shame in losing such a fine battle, watching Landon celebration in the ring, knowing Landon will now be meeting the Television Champion… Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 As we return from commercial break, we see a jam packed crowd of people pressing against guardrails- barely holding control as they strain to snap pictures and stare in awe and wonderment. And slightly left of the crowd viewing Niagara falls we see a much smaller but much more raucous crowd standing behind the barriers next to the SJL Ring. Ah, well. Wrestling will boom again soon. Either way, Crimson’s BACK~! Annie: WELCOME BACK to SJL Crimson! We’re LIVE from Niagara Falls with a HUGE episode of Crimson. Ejiro: That’s right, we have a new and most definitely IMPROVED World Heavyweight Champion in John Duran, and all holy hell is going to break loose later tonight when Duran and Urban Decay take on the team of Danny Conklin, Manson and Leo Breslin. Judge: But just MOMENTS AGO, we saw Landon Maddix defeat Tommy Nguyen in impressive fashion to earn a shot at the Television Title. The only question is, who will he face for the belt? Ejiro: The Television Champion, one would hope. Judge: Ah, yes. But who will that champion be come next week? Ejiro: Very good question my astute partner? Who WILL it be? Annie: Would you two idiot shut up? Todd Royal Vs. Jay Morrison. TV Title. NEXT~! Funyon: Ladies and Gentlemen…the Following match is scheduled for one Fall, with a 30 minute time limit, and is for the SJL WORLD TELVISION CHAMPIONSHIP!! With that, “We Took Pelham” takes over the sound system at the makeshift outdoor arena. As the strobe lights flash on the entrance way and the trumpets blare, a huge flash of fireworks arcs over the façade of Niagara Falls, spelling out “JAY MORRISON”. The fans boo this obvious show of superiority as the curtain parts and Jay Morrison slowly struts out. Morrison smoothes his diamond encrusted robe and looks towards the falls, smirking and tossing his hair back. Making his way through the sea of strobes, sparks and jeers, Morrison enters the ring and absorbs the reaction of the crowd. Funyon: Announcing first, from London, England…weighing in at 239 pounds…he is the CHALLENGER…this is JAY MORRISON!!! Judge: Jay Morrison may be a rookie, but he’s definitely one to watch here in the SJL, the man’s been impressive in defeat and in victory, and Todd Royal would be best served not to take him lightly. Ejiro: Plus he’s Freakin’ loaded! Have you SEEN his jet? It’s AMAZING. He let me ride in it once…I got lost going to the bathroom. Annie: Ya, I heard that about you… Funyon: And his opponent…Accompanied to the ring by Meagan Skye and weighing in at 220 pounds…From San Diego, California…he is the ESS JAY ELL…WOOOOORRRRRLLLLDD TELEVISION CHAMPION….TODD ROYAL!!!! The lights in the surrounding the ring go out (which makes no difference since its still light out, but hey…) and a spotlight shines on a curtain pulled across a clothesline. As a heavenly chorus of awe plays from the boom box sound system, a series of blue and white strobe lights illuminate the walkway and Motley Crue’s “Livewire” is heard throughout the crowd. Megan Skye steps through the curtain first, a towel in her hand and a sparkling pink halter top that reads “DISCIPLE OF TODD”. The crowd boos the valet as she parts the cloth and out steps Todd Royal. Sunglasses in place, TV Title over the shoulder and “GOOD TODD” vest covering his rib tape, Royal scorns the booing fans as he struts to the ring. Annie: MEGAN~! My prayers are answered! I can finally watch a Todd Royal match in peace. Wow. Look at her…I wouldn’t mind riding HER waterfall…Wouldn’t mind throwing HER over a barrel… Judge: Yes, we understand. You’re a lesbian. Annie: But LOOK at her, she’s a Goddess. Ejiro: Nope, she’s a Toddess. THE Toddess, and don’t you ever forget it. As Royal gets into the ring, he removes his vest to reveal his rib tape has more messages scrawled on it. “NO INJURY HERE” adorns the front of the bandages, while “FIRE PROOF” graces the back in a jab at the post-match attack by Craig McLennan on Wrath. Referee Sexton Hardcastle escorts Megan from the ring in mid-towel-off and takes the title belt from Todd, holding it up for the crowd. As the two competitors glare at each other, the bell rings and the match is under way. *DING* *DING* *DING* Royal and Morrison circle each other and trade icy glares as they move around the ring. As the men go in for a lock-up, Morrison ducks under the arms of Royal and struts to the other side of the ring. The crowd boos his brashness, but Jay just smirks and turns back to a scowling Todd. Royal nods his head and lunges for another lockup, and this time Morrison follows. Royal however, immediately steps back and drops his arms, leaving Morrison to lunge at nothing and stagger blindly into the corner. As the crowd boos the continued stalling and Royal towels off, Morrison spits at the ground and glares at Todd. Annie: Wow, exciting match so far huh? These tow are just trying to out-asshole each other… Ejiro: …which is a very admirable goal… Annie:…when they SHOULD be trying to wrestle. Ejiro: Eh, they will. But now…DICKISHNESS! Morrison regains his composure and struts to the middle of the ring, where he stares Royal down. Both men go in for a lockup, more slowly this time, and grab it, immediately ratcheting the intensity up and jockeying for position. Royal gets the first advantage, spinning around into a waist lock and trying to wrest Jay to the mat. Morrison refuses to topple, however, and instead breaks Royal’s grip and spins behind him, taking Todd down with a spinning wrist lock. As Royal hits the mat, Morrison immediately breaks the hold and floats back into an arm bar. Royal struggles to escape as Jay smugly mocks the audience standing at ringside. Todd shifts onto his side and hooks his legs around Morrison’s arm, taking him backwards in a crucifix roll-up. Morrison rolls through and stands up into a fireman’s carry, and looks to spin it into a fireman’s carry Arm breaker, but Royal spins through into an arm drag. Judge: Impressive series of moves by both Morrison and Royal, displaying their technical knowledge and incredible pedigree. Annie: I won’t deny that these two can go, but you won’t see me wearing their T-shirts any day soon. They’re both world class jerk offs as far as I’m concerned. Ejiro: It’s GREAT isn’t it? As Morrison hit’s the mat and spins across it, Todd pops back to his feet and charges at his fallen opponent. Morrison sees the champion coming and pumps his feet into the air, catching Royal in the ribs and flipping him into the corner. As Todd crashes face-first into the turnbuckles, Morrison springs after him, attempting to hit his opponent with a splash into the corner. Royal ducks the splash and catches Jay in an Electric Chair, spinning him down and hooking on a standing leg-bar. Morrison fights back, swinging his free leg in a kick at the legs of Royal, but Todd leaps over the attack. Jay immediately swings his leg back, however, dropping Todd with a leg sweep. As Royal hits the mat, Morrison leaps over him, driving down with an elbow across the throat and locking on an inverted face lock. The crowd applauds the chain wrestling, but Morrison just spits at them, and Royal flips them off from the mat, turning the polite cheers to boos. Annie: See, Royal and Morrison could be excellent wrestlers, but instead of concentrating on their holds and counters, they’re more concerned with antagonizing the crowd. Royal should be trying to counter that headlock, but he’s flipping off the crowd. Judge: But it works…Royal’s the TV champion, and you can’t argue with success. Annie: Oh, I sure can. As the crowd’s jeers wash over the competitors, Royal tries to bridge up into a standing position. His ribs don’t allow him the flexibility to bridge up, however, so he spins around into a headlock, and powers out with a side suplex. Royal sighs with relief at escaping, but Morrison lands on his feet, drawing boos from the crowd. Royal bows, assuming the jeers are aimed at him, giving Jay enough to time to charge him from behind, nailing him with a flying enzigri and dropping him to his knees. Morrison kips up and hits the ropes, charging with a seated dropkick to the face, dropping Todd to the mat. With Royal on the mat, Morrison runs the ropes again and goes for the running boot scrape. Royal moves his head out of the way at the last second, and Jay simply stomps the mat, allowing Todd to grab the leg and Dragon Screw Jay to the mat. Royal grabs his opponents free leg and falls backwards, hitting a slingshot that fires Jay to the turnbuckles. As Morrison rebounds, the champion hooks him between the legs, spinning him down into a Blue Thunder Bomb. Hardcastle hit’s the mat for the count as the crowd boos. ONE!… . . . . . . . . . TWO!!… . . . . . . . . . . . KICKOUT!!! Judge: Royal goes for the first cover of the match, trying to prove that he is the on in control of his championship match. Annie: A little too early to get a pinfall on Morrison though, it looks like Todd is just trying to show Jay that he’s felt him out enough and its time to get down to business. Ejiro: And Todd’s a great athlete and all, and MY Todd and Savior, but I think today could be the day for Jay Morrison. Judge: Oh, and why do you think that? Ejiro: Because to be the King you need the Bling Bling, and the TV Title is the Bling. Jay told me that on his jet y’know. As Morrison rolls out of the pin and both men get to their feet, Todd reaches under his wrist tape and feels around. The crowd boos and Jay protests, sending Sexton Hardcastle over to make sure he didn’t pull out a foreign object. As Todd looks on shocked, he presents his empty hands and indicates he simply was itching at his ribs. The crowd boos the excuse, and Morrison takes the opportunity to jump his opponent, hitting a knee to the head and knocking Todd to the mat. With Royal down, Morrison goes to work, pulling the champion up and hitting a snap DDT. Morrison sneers as the crowd boos his sneak attack. Annie: That was a blatant abuse of the rules right there, and a prime example of why neither of these guys will get very far with their current attitudes. Ejiro: Yeah, I know what you mean…Todd was obviously reaching for a foreign object to try and steal the victory from Jay Morrison. It’s sad really… Judge: Oh, quiet. Todd’s rib tape was obviously chaffing his skin, and he was simply readjusting it. Morrison should mind his own business. Ejiro: Mind his own business? If Jay hadn’t stepped in to uphold the rules, all hell could have broken loose! Annie: Wait, uphold the rules?!? Morrison attacked Royal from behind! Ejiro: Well, obviously not THOSE rules. Geez… Morrison goes to the top rope, pointing at his opponent and laughing while tapping his knee. As Royal rolls onto his side and clutches his ribs, the challenger soars with a flying knee drop, aiming right for the head of Todd. Megan reaches into the ring and pulls Royal away at the last second, however, and Morrison crashes to the mat unprotected. As the challenger rolls out to the outside clutching his knee, Royal gets to his feet. Jay goes to roll back into the ring, but stops to jaw with a fan at ringside, allowing Todd to shoot himself over the top rope with a somersault plancha to the outside. Judge: Royal’s flying! Todd takes to the air and plows Jay Morrison down on the outside of the ring. Annie: You have to wonder if that’s the best move for Todd though, with those injured ribs. A simple baseball slide dropkick would do the same damage, only with less of a risk of further injury. Ejiro: And when have you known Todd to take the less flashy and cocky way out?… Royal tosses Morrison into the ring and pauses to towel his forehead before climbing up onto the apron as well. With Jay’s head lying beneath the bottom rope in a vulnerable position, Royal jumps into the air and comes down with a flying leg drop to the neck. Morrison rolls back into the ring in pain as Todd again pulls himself onto the apron. Royal once again pauses to adjust his tape, drawing desperate protests from the challenger in the ring. Hardcastle glares at Morrison, but nods and once again looks to Royal for confirmation. Todd throws up his hands in frustration and puts them in front of the official’s face, proving to him that he has NO foreign objects on his knuckles or tucked into his palms. Hardcastle begrudgingly nods and turns to Morrison, but Jay is already to his feet, lunging forward with a super kick that cold clocks Royal and sends him sprawling to the outside. Judge: What is WRONG with that ref? Royal already proved he had no foreign objects, but he checked again anyway, and again Jay Morrison slips in with a blindside attack. Ejiro: I’m not sure what you’re referring to. Morrison was just being extremely thorough in making sure Royal played by the rules. Annie: Are you two just going to argue about which one of these morons is a better idiot all night, because this is getting old. As Royal stumbles to his feet, the challenger springboards to the top rope and flies to the outside with a flying shoulder tackle. Todd hits the mats hard on impact as Morrison picks him up and delivers a stiff Yakuza kick. Royal collapses to the ground, but is rolled into the ring by his opponent, and Jay Morrison heads to the top rope again. As the champion lies motionless on the mat and Megan Skye screams from the outside, Morrison again leaps from the top rope, crashing down with the flying knee drop, but connecting on this second attempt. Annie: Jay Morrison going for that flying knee again, even though he was unsuccessful last time. I guess that is a sure sign of Jay’s confidence in himself that he would try a move that already proved to backfire. Ejiro: Jay isn’t used to not getting his way, and he WANTED to hit that move for the past few minutes. So he beat Royal down even more and then went for the move again, proving to his opponent that nothing he does can stop Morrison from getting his way. Judge: And he’s looking to get the cover off of it as well! ONE!… . . . . . . . . . . . . TWO!!… . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . THR… . . . . . . . KICKOUT!! Royal shoves Morrison off of him and crawls to the ropes, but an angry Morrison runs the opposite ropes and launches himself at his opponent with a leg drop that guillotine’s Todd’s neck across the ropes. With the champion slumping, Morrison seizes the opportunity and pulls his opponent to his feet. Hooking his head underneath the arm of Royal, Morrison fires backwards, shooting Todd over with a Northern Lights suplex. Jay bridges to try and get the pin, but Megan runs around the ring and hooks Royal’s leg over the bottom rope, preventing the count. An angry Morrison argues with the ref, as the crowd boos the actions over both men. Annie: Can we see a replay of that? Please? Ejiro: Yeah, can we…that was a BEAUTIFUL northern light’s suplex by Morrison! Annie: Huh? No, not that…Megan running. Royal pulls himself up by the ropes, but before he can mount an offense, Morrison grabs him from behind and underhooks both arms, looking for a Tiger Suplex. Royal spins out with one arm however, and looks to reverse the move, but Morrison spins him back around and clocks him with a short-arm clothesline. As Royal hit’s the mat, Morrison grabs the towel from Megan Skye and blows his nose in it, tossing it into the crowd and drawing boos from the audience. “DADDY’S BOY!” “DADDY’S BOY!” “DADDY’S BOY!” Morrison just shrugs the insults and pulls Todd back up to his feet. He hooks in a front chancery and jumps, dropping Royal with a DDT that sends him sprawling across the canvas. Morrison covers, but as Hardcastle drops to the mat to count, pulls Todd off the mat. The official gets back to his feet, but Morrison shoves Todd’s head between his legs and hooks his arms, delivering a Double Underhook bomb to the champion. The ref immediately drops for the count, but Morrison just smirks until he gets back to his feet before covering, drawing the official back to the mat with a scowl. ONE!… . . . . . . . . . . . TWO!!… . . . . . . . . . . . THR… . . . . . . . . Eeee…… . . . . . . . . . KICKOUT!!! Judge: Todd kicks out! By the grace of Todd, Royal kicks out!!! Ejiro: Wha……?? Annie: Jay Morrison, proving that money can’t buy an IQ, was more interested in playing yoyo with the referee than covering his opponent, and it gave Todd just enough time to recover and kick out of the Power bomb!!! Ejiro: I don’t know what you’re talking about…That was obviously a slow count by an incompetent referee who can’t take a joke! With Morrison on his knees arguing with Hardcastle over the speed and accuracy of the count, Royal is able to get to his feet. Jay starts to get to his feet, but Todd springs off his opponent’s knee and catches the challenger right in the face with a Shining Wizard! Morrison collapses to the mat, and Royal does the same, drawing a 10 count from the official. 1...2...3... Judge: Royal comes back with an amazing Shining Wizard! The Champion’s comeback begins!! 4...5...6... Annie: But you have to think that the first man to his feet will have the advantage here. He’ll have the first opportunity to hit a big move, and possibly put this match away! 7...8... At the count of eight, Royal makes it to his feet. He spits on the face of Jay Morrison and pulls him to his feet, hooking his right arm under his left arm pit and his left arm under his right armpit. Morrison tries desperately to fight out, but Royal flings him back with a brutal Straight Jacket Suplex. Morrison bounces off his head and slumps to the mat, as Todd floats over and makes the cover. ONE!… . . . . . . . . . . . . TWO!!… . . . . . . . . . THR… . . . . . . . Eeee….. . . . . . . KICKOUT!! At the count of two, the challenger’s shoulder barely pops off the mat. Royal slams his fist to the mat in frustration and glares at the referee, but immediately drops an elbow across the chest of his opponent. Morrison tries to roll out of the way of further punishment, but Todd pulls him back down a scrapes his boot across the face of Jay Morrison. The crowd boos, as Todd Royal steps through the ropes and points to the top rope. Royal waves off their advice however, and climbs the turnbuckles as Morrison climbs to his feet. Morrison turns wearily around and Todd turns around to face the crowd. As the challenger turns, dazed, towards the turnbuckles, Royal leaps with a moosault press! On the way down, Morrison leaps with a desperation dropkick, catching Royal in the gut and sending him crashing to the mat. As Royal hit’s the mat, Morrison collapses as well, and both men struggle to catch their breath. Ejiro: Amazing resiliency by Jay Morrison! He’s still very much in this match, and very much in the hunt for the TV title!! Judge: No way! That was Morrison’s last gasp, and it wasn’t enough to put away Todd, as he’s still stirring… this is Todd’s match to win!! Annie: I don’t care who wins, as long as it stops you two morons from arguing like school girls….Mmmm…school girls…. Morrison is the first to make it to his feet, and turns around to see Royal again reaching underneath his rib tape. Jay pulls Hardcastle over again and demands another search for foreign weapons, but this time Hardcastle flatly refuses, signaling that the last two times he did that Morrison used it as an excuse to attack Royal. Morrison demands it again, but Sexton stands his ground. As an obviously upset Morrison pushes Hardcastle out of the way, Royal reaches into his tape and pulls out brass knuckles! The crowd boos heavily as Royal reels back and clocks his opponent, quickly discarding the knuckles to the outside, where Megan puts them in her shirt. Morrison, dazed, staggers backwards, where he meets Todd again. Royal hooks Jay in a full nelson and lunges backwards, hitting a release TODD DAMN and reaching over for the cover. ONE!… . . . . . . . . . . TWO!!… . . . . . . . . . . . THR… . . . . . . . Eee…. . . . . Eee…. . . . THREE! *DING* *DING* *DING* “ROYAL SUCKS!” “ROYAL SUCKS!” “ROYAL SUCKS!” Judge: ROYAL WINS! Todd Royal retains his TV Title again!!! Todd Damn! Ejiro: NO! He CHEATED! He DID have a foreign object in his rib tape!!! Jay was right all along! That Idiot Sexton Hardcastle!!! Annie: Hmm…I wonder if I could get a hold of those knux now… Royal grabs his belt and jumps up in the air, celebrating despite the boos of the crowd. In the ring, Morrison lays flat on his back, a trickle of blood running down his face and into his mouth. As “Livewire” plays over the speakers again, Megan steals a camera from one of the Niagara Falls tourists to snap a picture of her, Todd and the belt in front of the falls. The boos continue as Royal and Skye disappear through the curtain again. Judge: So our question is answered! Ejiro: We have a question? Judge: Yeah, now we know that it will be Todd Royal defending his title against Landon Maddix! Ejiro: When did we ask that? Judge: At the beginning of the match… Ejiro: Oh. Huh. I forgot. Annie: *sigh* Anyway, don’t let these two scare you off. Still to come, we have the amazing Niagara Death Match, and the HUUUGE six man tag team main event when Urban Decay and their leader and World Champion John Duran face off with Danny Conklin, Manson and Leo Breslin. PLUS, up next it will be English Dragon and Tim Dillon for the #1 contendership for the European Title. STAY TUNED!!! Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 In the backstage area, Ben Hardy, ever a magnet for trouble, stands by. With his usual worried look on his face, he stands mumbling to himself, perhaps practicing some lines for what is to come next. A slight snapping of fingers is heard as Gus the cameraman extraordinaire signals to Hardy to begin. “Oh. This is Ben Hardy standing outside the locker room of Viktor Tarakanov, whose actions as of late have been getting him in trouble with the higher powers. We were scheduled to interview him in front of his locker room, but it doesn’t look like he’s anywhere to be...” Ask and ye shall receive. “Do not be so quick to run off, Hardy.” Tarakanov comes strolling up to his own room at a casual pace. “I assume that this interview was scheduled to allow me to explain my actions last week. Am I correct?” Hardy nervously replies “Well yes... sir. Commissioner Raynor and I’m sure the fans would like to know exactly why you used a sickle to cut up the forehead of Leo Breslin last week.” With almost a chuckle, Tarakanov replies “It was very simple. I wanted to release a bit of stress. The rules permitted my doing so, and I took advantage of them. I have no grudge against Leo Breslin. We have faced before but not out of anger. The man was just in the wrong place on the card against the wrong opponent. You see, on the flag of my country we have many symbols. The two most important of which, are a hammer and a sickle. When my country was born, we fought great struggle, but out of the blood... was formed a united nation. With anger and with heart we combined the classes of the farmers and the workers into one glorious land. And thus the significance of the hammer and of the sickle. The hammer represents those who labored hard with force to build the cities of the Soviet Union, and the sickle represents the reaping of the crops to feed the people. By uniting them, we had the ideal nation.” There is a pause. “But those symbols also mean something more. The sickle was used to tear down the fruit of the Earth, the good of the land, the destruction of all that was pure. That raw material was in turn crushed by the hammer to replace it with something better. Eliminating the good of one to benefit greater cause. That is what happened to Leo Breslin. I eliminated the pure good for the benefit to the greater cause... me.” Hardy, obviously not listening or at least forgetting who he is interviewing, speaks up “But you still didn’t say exactly what made you do it.” For his insolence, Hardy is treated with a bitch-slap to the side of his face. Viktor yanks the microphone from his hand and finishes the interview by himself. “Silence! You want to know why I ruined Breslin’s face? I tell you. I was scheduled to face Charlie Matthews for his title last week... but instead... he is ascended. I went to the back and gave Raynor my opinions on the subject and had my shot at the belt ripped from me! Instead of being in the main event, facing Charlie Matthews for his World title... I was stuck facing Leo Breslin in a hardcore match. So I decided to showcase how much of a threat I can be when provoked. And now, like the symbols of my land, I will rip through all the innocent purity in my way for the greater cause and smash down with an iron hand all the oppose the greater good. Until I get the championship... I... will... not... stop.” With that, Tarakanov whips the microphone behind him, hitting hardy in the crotch, and storms off to prepare for his match. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 Dillon vs Dragon is teh missing. Thought I had it, but turns out I didn't. Bleh. Pasted in when I recieve it. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 The fans surrounding the wrestling ring placed in a special section of the massive parking lot of the Niagara Falls look-out point are anxiously waiting for what could very well be the highlight of their beer-swilling, poncho-wearing night. As the camera pans by the fans who sit in nothing more than large portable bleachers and folding chairs under no protection from the heavens or from the off-spray of the falls, they seem relatively careless of their gruff surroundings. True, the Canadian fans on the Ontario side of Niagara Falls are SJL fans through thick and thin so long as they get to see three men get thrown off ledge and into the falls. The camera switches over to our announcing team, two of which are wearing rather ridiculous looking “Justice and Rule” ponchos. Ejiro: Dammit, Annie! Why’d you have to take my poncho when I was in the bathroom? Annie: Look at this suit! This set me back a bit, and I’ll be damned if I’m gonna let it get ruined so quickly. Ejiro: Thanks Miss Considerate. What about MY clothes? These were- *Ejiro is suddenly sprayed by water from the falls* DAMMIT!! Judge: If I may... Our next match... if you could call it that... is definitely one of the trademarks of the SJL. Every so often, the SJL has a sort of a brawl in a unique local. They’ve had them in Miami, they’ve had them in malls, they’ve even had them in France in the Bastille. But now the stakes are just a bit higher. As per the rules deemed by Commissioner Raynor, to become the winner in the match, you must actually throw your opponent into the falls themselves. Annie: And if that weren’t enough, we’re on the Ontario side of he falls, which actually contains nine times more water than the American side! Yes, a one hundred and seventy six foot plunge into deep, icy cold water awaits any of the three losers in this match. Hope you boys wore some thick swimmin’ trunks, because there’s gonna be some SERIOUS shrinkage! Ejiro: No doubt that Commissioner Raynor expects Trepanier to take the easy victory here tonight, being that he’s a member of Urban Decay. And I agree with him! This man is one of the soundest technical wrestlers we have in the SJL right now, and I say he’s near unstoppable in this match! Annie: Dude, there’s not going to be any wrestling in this match tonight. The object is to throw your opponent OVER and INTO the falls! It’s not like he’s going to throw on an armbar instead of tossing his opponent into the water. In the ring, wearing a dazzling green and highly elaborate... poncho... Funyon raises the mic to his face and begins to announce. “Ladies and gentlemen! This match is the Niagara Falls Brawl and is conducted under elimination style rules. The last man NOT thrown into the falls is the winner! Introducing first, he weighs in tonight at two hundred and forty one pounds and hails from The Bronx, New York... HYYYYBRIIIID!!” The small portable SmarkTrons display the image of a lone flame suddenly getting larger and larger until it appears as though the screens themselves are blazing with fire. At this point a massive rush of flaming pyro erupts from the entrance and “Cancer” by Fuel starts up, causing the wrestler Hybrid to emerge. For all the fire in his entrance and on his clothes, Hybrid’s face is simply icy as he walks down to the ring slowly. The fans are relatively indifferent towards him as he appears not to even notice that they are around, watching him. Hybrid reaches the ring and steps inside quickly. He instantly turns around and stares at the entrance, awaiting the arrival of his first opponent. Annie: Well, last week Hybrid fell at the hands of “La Cucaracha” but tonight he’s got himself another chance to prove... himself. Judge: Eloquently put. Ejiro: This kid’s got a fire in his eyes though. I see big things for him down the road. Annie: You’re just saying that because he’s got a cool entrance. Funyon begins to speak but is cut off immediately by the ominous words that echo from the loudspeakers. “It’s... FATE!!” The lights that usually illuminate the makeshift stage fade out and are replaced by a singular blinding white light that casts it’s beam down upon the stage. Then a man walks out, wearing a dark hooded cloak, his face shrouded from all. As he lifts his face to the heavens the hood falls and reveals the face of the man once known as Bloodshed. The face is recognizable... but somehow... different. Changed, if you will. As the near celestial light illuminates his face, he quickly drops his head forward and a grinding metal beat shakes the audience from their seats. The heavenly light is quickly replaced by huge bursts of flame as the audience is bathed in a red light. Now, The Apostle walks down the ramp slowly, as religious images flash over the SmarkTrons, quickly overtaken by flame. Funyon begins to speak again, with a certain amount of worry in his voice. Not sure exactly what to make of this changed man. “And... he weighs in at two hundred and twenty five pounds... hailing from... he is... The Apostle...” The usual excitement in Funyon’s voice is gone as he simply watches The Apostle make his way down the ramp, grinning a devilish grin to no one in particular... except, perhaps God. The fans are near silent for this almost new competitor they see, for they are unsure as to what his reactions will be either way. The Apostle finally reaches the ring and ascends the steps slowly, seemingly calculating his every move, even entering the ring. The man once known as Bloodshed steps into the ring and stands near that corner, his eyes never leaving Hybrid, who to say the least is a bit unsettled by the unmoving smile of his opponent. The Apostle then removes his cloak, sets it outside the ring, and continues to stare at Hybrid. Judge: Well... we were scheduled to see Bloodshed in action, but it looks as though we got someone quite different. Annie: Head drops can do that to ya. Well, Bloodshed calls himself The Apostle now and if it’s at all possible, I think this incarnation of that man may have it in for Craig McLennan even more than Bloodshed. Ejiro: Well, if that were the case, Craig McLennan better be plenty afraid of that man, whatever he calls himself. The music fades down and Funyon again speaks up “Next... he weighs in at two hundred and seventy two pounds... hailing from Grand Rapids... Manitoba, Canada *surprising pop for the generally hated Canadian boy* representing Urban Decay... ‘Canadian Thunder’ CHRIS TREPAAAANIIIIEEEER!!” “This is the New Shit” by Marilyn Manson kicks in and “Canadian Thunder” steps onto the stage to meet a surprisingly positive reaction from the fans. From beneath his mask, Trepanier lets a slight grin out before starting his walk to the ring. As he gets to the ring, he rolls under the bottom rope and stands up to find both of his opponents staring at him. As an experienced wrestler, Trepanier knows well enough to blow off the glances as non-audible trash-talk. Feeling confident about competing in the country of his birth, Trepanier actually climbs the turnbuckles and throws his hands up to the crowd, igniting their cheers again. Judge: Trepanier isn’t very popular outside of Canada, but when he competes in his land the fans seem to take to him well. Ejiro: They’re a bunch of hypocrites. They’ll watch him on TV and boo what he does with Urban Decay, but when we get around to coming up here, they cheer him like he’s CIA! Annie: At least some fans actually enjoy watching HIM compete. But then again... the two do look similar. Maybe they just think he’s a really tall CIA. Trepanier climbs down and waits in his corner as the tension in the ring of the three men leering at each other builds heavily. Even Funyon senses the anxiousness of the three men to start to commence with the ass kickings, so he tries to make his announcing quick but to no avail. *KABOOM!!* *TAAAAAA!!* The massive explosion of red pyro and blaring opening chord of the Soviet National Anthem herald the arrival of Viktor Tarakanov. As the vocals to the tune start up and the smoke clears, “The Red Rage” emerges from the entranceway and begins his walk down the ramp, met by strong boos. Even in a country other than that which he despises, Tarakanov is still recognized as one of the most hated men in the league. He is impartial to their reaction as he shows by simply ignoring them and tightening his wrist tape. Several fans in the front row try to start a “U.S.A.!!” chant but are instantly showered with pitchers of Molson. Annie: I didn’t know they sold pitchers of beer at a wrestling event. Judge: This is Canada, you’d be surprised how much beer they sell. Ejiro: If you can even call this beer. *Ejiro takes a sip out of his pitcher of yellowish beer* Annie: I hate to break it to you, chum, but that’s not beer. Judge: You should really take the time to read the label on what you drink. Ejiro: What are you talking about? *Ejiro turns the pitcher around to see that it does not say ‘Molson’ on it, but it does say ‘Manson’* Uuugggghhh... that FREAK!! Funyon quickly announces, trying to get out of that potential war-zone as fast as possible. “And finally... he weighs in at two hundred and eighty pounds... fighting out of Astrakhan, Russia... he is ‘The Red Rage’ VIKTOR TARAKAAAANOOOOV!!” Viktor finishes his walk to the ring and walks up the steel steps slowly. Remaining on the apron for a moment, eyeing up every single person in the ring, sizing them all up. He then quickly steps in the ring and charges towards Chris Trepanier. With a barrage of punches, the Russian charges the Canadian with fists ablazing. The Apostle takes a cue from Tarakanov and charges at Hybrid, also bum-rushing his opponent into a corner. Viktor uses his expert shoot-fighting skills to knock the wind and energy out of Trepanier as The Apostle does much the same. The two break from their punching and look over at each other from across the ring and nod in accordance. Using surprisingly keen coordination, both men whip their opponents into the opposite turnbuckles and then both charge at them. Viktor runs and hits an charging clothesline while The Apostle runs at Hybrid and grabs him by the shoulders, quickly jumping in the air and placing his boots in Hybrid’s gut. The Apostle falls backwards and kicks with all his might, monkey-flipping the newcomer into the middle of the ring. He instantly springs to his feet and turns to Tarakanov but gets nailed back to the mat by the Iron Curtain. The crowd boos but Tarakanov simply shrugs them off like dust and turns back towards Trepanier, only to get viciously belly-to-belly suplexed. Judge: Almost tag work by Tarakanov and The Apostle there. Annie: Well... until Tarakanov clotheslined The Apostle to hell. Ejiro: And a surprise belly-to-belly by Trepanier. I’ll bet Viktor didn’t see THAT coming! Trepanier rolls out of the ring and pulls Tarakanov to the outside as well. Attempting to get the most difficult part out of the way quickly, Chris Trepanier tries to haul Tarakanov over to the guard rail of the falls but out of NOWHERE, Hybrid comes sailing over the top rope to the outside and takes Trepanier and to a lesser extent Tarakanov to the cold, damp concrete below. The crowd explodes in excitement as all three men come tumbling to the concrete. Inside the ring, the man once known as Bloodshed stands up and looks out at the carnage on the concrete. Deciding not to take the difficult route, The Apostle simply bails out of the ring and walks over to them. With a certain amount of caution, The Apostle approaches Hybrid, who gets to his feet at around the same time as Tarakanov. The Apostle grabs Hybrid and attempts to throw him over the railing but Hybrid stops himself short and quickly elbows The Apostle in the gut, stunning him. Whilst his opponent is stunned Hybrid quickly goes behind his opponent and attempts to German suplex him, but The Apostle isn’t out yet. The more The Apostle fights, the tighter Hybrid holds onto the hold, until suddenly, Viktor Tarakanov moves behind both of the struggling men and wraps his own arms around his opponent’s waist. Showing an almost unbelievable amount of strength, “The Red Rage” actually hoists both men up and over his head. Annie: WHAT THE FUCK?! Judge: I don’t believe we’re allowed to swear like that, Annie. Ejiro: HOLY FUCK!! Judge: Honestly. Am I the only one here who’s worried about keeping my job? Annie: Did you not see that? That was indescribable! Judge: I saw. But about your mouths... Ejiro: Viktor Tarakanov just GERMAN SUPLEXED TWO MEN!! Judge: Yes but-- Ejiro: AT THE SAME TIME!! Judge: Ejiro, I understand. Ejiro: Then MARVEL WITH ME!! Hybrid lands mainly on his shoulders and upper back, but... The Apostle lands almost completely on his head, certainly aggravating his concussion. The crowd simultaneously winces as the mass of humanity comes tumbling down viciously to the concrete. There is little movement for quite a while, as it seems that the move took a lot out of everyone involved. Trepanier sits up and looks at the pile of bodies to his left and can only imagine what happened. “Canadian Thunder” gets to his feet and sees Tarakanov start to stand and readies himself. As “The Red Rage” emerges from beneath the bodies of his victims, he looks up at Trepanier and immediately charges him and hits a huge back rake! Chris Trepanier staggers around in pain forever before bleeding from the back and tripping over the guardrail because he’s so friggin tall and falling into Niagara Falls! OMGDZ~!!1! And then Hybrid and The Apostle stand up and glare at Tarakanov menacingly but he holds up his hands non-threateningly and says “Listen doodz, I don’t wanna fight! Let’s all be friends instead of fighting! Ok?” And they all agree. OMGDZ~!!1! So then they bust out the lawn chairs and sit down, looking at the falls. Then the crowd’s like “WHAT?!” and then Tom Flesher’s all like “Pfft.” and stuff. Anyways, the guys sit around idly chatting until it is Hybrid who makes a move as he reaches under the ring and grabs out... a cooler. Then he’s all like “Who wants a Corona?” and then Vik and The Apostle are all like “Dood!! MEE!!” OMGDZ~!!1! Well, the guys sat around for a while and they got to talking, and they all learned a little bit about each other that night, and a bit about themselves too. It turns out that Hybrid was from South America and never knew his birth parents. Tarakanov sucked his thumb till he was twenty one and still has a blankee. The Apostle’s real name was Pam and was partially responsible for the making of the Spy Kids movies. Skeeter was drafted and killed in Vietnam. Yes, those men bonded that night like nobody had ever done before. AWWWWZORZ~!!1! After all the Coronas were gone and they’d talked about nearly everything ever, the three men decided to call it a night. The Apostle said “Doodz, I gotta pee before I leave!” and the other guys said “OK!!” Then Hybrid and Tarakanov shared a big long hetero-sexual hug and cried for quite some time. Touching scene. After the hugging and crying was done, they decided to wait for The Apostle to come back and when they turned to look for him, all they could see was a great big moped with a hot dog vending case on the front of it and a crazed Apostle driving it! OMGDZ~!!1! There is fear in Hybrid’s eyes and urine running down his leg as the moped literally PLOWS through him and the guardrail at a top speed of... 10 mph!!! OMGDZ~!!1! Then both The Apostle, Hybrid, the hot dogs, and the senator of Wyoming all fall into Niagara Falls... never to be seen again. Dun dun duhn!! (sting music) Cacheeeww cacacheeew!! (lightning) On his way down, The Apostle can be heard yelling: “I FUCKING HATE CORONA!!!” And Funyon drinks more Corona and says “BAH GAWD!! VIKTOR IS THE VICTOR!!” Everyone boos. Ejiro: BAH GAWD HOT DOGS!!! Judge: Main event next. I swear it wont be as bad as the last match. I promise. What? Please don’t change the channel. No. Don’t try it. I’ll give you candy if you stay tuned. Seriously. Wait, stop! I can pay you! CHANGE IT AND I’LL PUT YOU IN A FUCKING ARMBAR~!! Annie: I = lesbian. OMGDZ~!!1! *commercial* Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 Judge: Welcome back to the show! We’re coming to you live from Niagara Falls, right smack in the middle of US and Canadian territory! Annie: And as we’ve already seen, Chris Trepanier prefers the Canadian half of the Falls, while the “Red Rage” Tarakanov probably thought it was time to pollute the American half! Ejiro: What in the blue hell are you yapping on about? Annie: Let me guess, you thought the “Interesting Stipulation” Deathmatch was your cue to pee. Ejiro: It wasn’t? Judge: ANYWAY. We’ve come to our main event and WHAT A MATCH it’s going to be! Annie: We’re going to see two women at ringside! Ejiro: And hope that Urban Decay take that ever important step closer to becoming half as good as Justice and Rule! The three ring commentators look at each other. Judge: I can’t believe we’re actually excited about an SJL match. Ejiro: Must be the air. The ever impeccable, ever commanding Funyon takes centrestage, but even the ring announcer seems intimidated by the crashing waterfall behind him. Funyon: Our Main Event, Six Man Tag match is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Dublin, Ireland and accompanied by Janet Quinn, please welcome DAAAAANNNNNNNYYYYY COOOONNNNKKLIIIIINNN! The opening strains of Off Kilter’s "Danny Boy" hits as the charismatic Irishman walks through the curtain and raises both his arms into the air. Danny continues down the ramp, slapping hands in typical babyface style. Behind him, his lithe girlfriend starts handing out little cloverleaves to the fans, many of which seem more interested in the giver than the gift. Conklin slides into the ring and climbs onto the second turnbuckle, blowing kisses to the crowd and giving that big bright smile to just about everyone in the arena. Janet struts around the ring, inducing cheers from the audience closer to her. Annie: I could watch Janet all night long and be very happy. Ejiro: You don’t WATCH women. You do things to them I wouldn’t even think of doing to Bill! Judge: Well, erm, uh… and that’s quite a lot! Even before “Danny Boy” fades out, the lights go out and “Won’t Back Down” by Fuel starts up. The stage bursts into random flames as the silhouette of Leo Breslin emerges from the back, accompanied by Leo Breslin. From the rafters, two strong spotlights track the movement of wrestler and valet as they make their way through the flames and down the ramp. Funyon: Now making his way to the ring, weighing 230 pounds and accompanied by Scarlet Minjonet, he is the SJL’s EUROPEAN CHAMPION, LEEEEEEOOOOOOOO BREEESSSSSSSLIIIIIIIIINNNNN! Judge: Breslin has that determined look on his face as he walks down the ramp. Maybe he’s concerned about facing the Urban Decay! Annie: Maybe he’s thinking of his impending title match against… Ejiro: OR MAYBE, he’s just constipated. Must you try to interpret EVERY action? I thought only Axis did that! He slides under the bottom rope and gets up in haste as Scarlet walks around to either side of the ring where Janet Quinn is, a smile on her face. Leo is soon bouncing up and down with athletic leaps. One final set of flames shoots high into the air, accompanied by four new flames from each of the posts as the song ends abruptly and the lighting returns. Leo and Danny shake hands and await their third partner. Annie: Janet Quinn AND Scarlet Minjonet BOTH in front of me. I’m practically speechless! Ejiro: That would be an improvement. Funyon: And last but not least, weighing in at 215 pounds, MAAAAAAANNNNSSOOOOOOOONNNN! The house lights drop to pitch black and red strobes rapidly flash on and off, as "Hate Song" by The Haunted hits. The one they call Manson emerges and throws up a one-handed metal taunt to the cheers of the crowd. Manson dashes down the ramp to the ring, wasting no time. Rolling in under the bottom rope, Manson gets to his feet and, in one smooth motion, throws off his leather jacket to the floor below. Ignoring his tag partners Danny and Leo, Manson simply makes his way to a corner, and waits for his nemesis, John Duran. Judge: It must be pointed out here that while Duran is our current World Champion… Ejiro: A title he so richly deserves. Judge: Yes, anyway, though the Sinner wears the belt, Manson has come very close to wearing it before. Annie: In fact, Manson was one of the contenders during the triple threat match for the vacant title. Ejiro: What are you, Mistress Obvious? “ON THE LEFT!” Zack de la Rocha’s "March of Death" echoes through the arena and the crowd reacts strongly to the three men emerging from the curtain. The massive form of Dominic Korgath appears first, raising his long iron staff into the air. The audience boos even louder as, from behind the curtain, steps the lean, mean form of Scott Solomon. Finally, as the last man appears, the crowd is practically on its feet in a mix of hate and respect. The three men raise their hands in a disrespectful salute as the death threats; insults and spam email start raining down on Urban Decay. Funyon: Now entering the ring, weighing at a MASSIVE 871 pounds, representing Commissioner Raynor’s Urban Decay, they are Dominic Korgath, Scott Solomon and the SJL WORLD CHAMPION “The Sinner” JOOOOOOOOOOHN DUUUUUUURAAAAAAN! Annie: Do you know what Urban Decay needs? A woman. The duo also known as Justice and Rule look at each other in mocked surprise. Ejiro: Would that make you root for them instead? Annie: You’re right. It won't. *I* need a woman. Scott Solomon and John Duran slap the back of Dominic Korgath, implying to the big man that he should do the initial damage on the opposing team. From the other corner, the European Champion Leo Breslin psyches himself up to meet his larger opponent. Dominic Korgath brushes away any form of offence from Breslin and starts smashing his large fists into the Euro Champ. After several hits to the body of Leo Breslin, the Big Demon grabs the arm and Irish whips his opponent into the ropes before flinging the European Champion into the air with a massive backdrop! Ejiro: BAH GAWD! Look at the elevation on that move! Korgath is a HOSS! He’s treating the European Champ like a rubber doll! Judge: Erm, there IS a reason why we’re the new announce team, Eji. Korgath begins stomping on the back of Leo Breslin as Scarlet Minjonet looks on in sheer horror. The Big Demon then steps into the ropes and, bouncing off them, drives a huge elbow right to the spine of the downed European Champ. The other members of Urban Decay cheer on their massive partner as Korgath picks up the limp Breslin from the mat. But wait, Breslin seems to have caught his second wind and cuts short the massacre with a quick elbow to the gut of Korgath! He launches a hard right fist at the masked face of Korgath, but it simply results in a stiff right hook that sends Breslin flying over the top rope. Korgath rolls underneath the bottom rope and continues to beat down on Breslin, at one point threatening to chuck the European Champion over the guardrail and into the waterfall! This act of unexpected violence incites a combined attack by Breslin’s teammates Manson and Danny Conklin! The two start pounding away at the Big Demon, to be joined later by Leo Breslin, who has since recovered from the brutal assault. The referee tries in vain to get the three men off Korgath and is about to call for a disqualification when suddenly; the masked powerhouse simply throws all three opponents off him! The Big Demon just shakes his head a couple of times before climbing back to the ring as if nothing had happened! Judge: Look at that! Dominic Korgath is unfazed. And why not? He weighs a good hundred pounds more than any of his opponents tonight! Annie: You have to remember that he also has the least experience among these six superstars. Size doesn’t matter. Experience counts for EVERYTHING. I should know. Ejiro: Wait, if this is about Janet or Scarlet… As if to prove Annie right, Leo Breslin takes advantage of the breather to launch a spirited attack on the Big Demon. The crowd counts along as Breslin starts laying into Korgath with several stiff elbow shots! Korgath, apparently having expended most of his energy is his initial attack, is forced back into the corner as Breslin’s second wind continues unimpeded. Breslin starts chopping away at the large torso of Korgath, much to the delight of the crowd. *CHOP* (WOOOOOO!) *CHOP* (WOOOOOO!) *CHOP* (WOOOOOO!) Not satisfied yet, Leo Breslin whips Korgath into the ropes. As the Big Demon comes charging back, the European Champion gets his arms around Dominic Korgath and with a sharp jerk of the body, he lifts the massive 350-pounder off his feet and plants him with a flawless German suplex! Judge: As much as I’d hate to admit it… Ejiro: So don’t. Judge: You know, you’re right! Ejiro: Haven’t you known me well enough by now? Now both men are down! Korgath is clutching his neck while Breslin rolls around, his back in extreme pain. The ref begins the count. ONE! … TWO! … THREE! … Breslin, drawing on some superhuman source of power, slowly gets to his feet and staggers towards the fallen form of Korgath. Annie: He’s going for the cover! Ejiro: It can’t end like this! ONE!!! … TWO!!! … Judge: NO! … KICKOUT! Annie: Breslin took too long to recover, giving Korgath enough time to come to his senses and kick out of the lateral press. Breslin can’t seem to believe he didn’t win and confronts the referee about it. Meanwhile, Korgath is slowly dragging himself over to the corner of Urban Decay, where his stablemates are waiting to be tagged in. Breslin notices the effort made by the Big Demon and goes over to prevent it… …but he’s too late! Duran reaches his hand out and slaps the outstretched hand of a spent Korgath! Judge: It’s now Champion versus Champion as Korgath makes the tag to John Duran! And look at how Duran is simply staring down Breslin! Remind you of us, doesn’t it, Eji? Annie: Sure, rub the fact that you’re BOTH FORMER SJL World Champions in my face, why don’t you. Ejiro: Once an SJL World Champion, always an SJL World Champion. As Duran enters the ring, Breslin goes over and clubs him on the back, catching Duran off-guard. However, being the fresh man, Duran drives an elbow into Leo's gut, stopping Breslin's offense before it can get off the ground. John gets to a vertical base after climbing through the ropes, bringing Breslin up to face him and then decking him with a right hand, staggering Breslin as Duran grabs Leo's right arm, getting some leverage from the ropes before tossing him to the opposite side of the ring. As Breslin comes back towards the center of the ring, Duran meets him with his left arm extended, catching Breslin in the chin and sending Leo down to the mat in a hurry. Judge: "Look at the raw power from Duran right there as he takes Breslin down." Annie: "Breslin is just too mismatched against these three members of Urban Decay. He needs to turn things around and get to his partners to tag out before it becomes too late." Ejiro: "I think Leo should just take the spanking he is about to get from the #1 man in the SJL. You know Duran is looking to do some hurtin'." Duran continues his attack, bouncing off the ropes nearest to the Urban Decay corner and coming right back towards Breslin, leaping up into the air and extending his leg, dropping it across the throat of Breslin as "The Sinner" connects with a legdrop. Duran quickly repositions himself on top of Breslin, going for the pinfall. ONE... TWO--KICKOUT! Duran says a few words to the ref about his performance counting the pinfalls but doesn't get too upset about it, grabbing Breslin by his dark brown hair and his right arm, bringing the Ohio man to his feet as John stands up himself. Duran keeps his hand on Leo's head, leaning back slightly and then rushing forward, slamming his head into Breslin as "The Sinner" sends him down to the mat with a headbutt. However, the headbutt is a big one, and Duran himself loses a little bit of his equilibrium. Annie: "There's the disadvantage of the headbutt at work right there. I don't even know why Duran uses it, because more often than--" Ejiro: "That's just it, Annie, Duran likes to take risks every once in a while. Remember that barbed wire match at Wrathapalooza? I'm sure you can appreciate his hardcore styling here, Annie, being the Hardcore Queen that you are." Judge: "Duran can be a sadistic bastard when you get right down to it, but he can also at times be a very fine athlete. This is definitely his rough style showing through here." Duran shakes off the dizziness in his head and returns to a normal state as Breslin is still having trouble getting over the aftereffects of that rough headbutt. Duran takes advantage of Leo's dazed state, approaching Breslin and bashing him in the back of the head with a forearm, sending Breslin stumbling into the ropes, trying to keep himself up with the advantage of ropes. Duran is relentless, and continues his attack with a few well-placed kicks to the solarplexes of Breslin. The ref attempts to get some distance between Duran and Breslin to give Leo a little time to breathe, but "The Sinner" is unwilling to stop driving his black boot into the gut of Leo, and when he's confronted again by the ref, Duran backs up and gets in the ref's face. Duran: "I KNOW CHRIS RAYNOR!" Annie: "So do I, buddy, what's it to you?" Ejiro: "Aww, someone's got a crush!" The ref appeals once again and Duran actually complies, likely just wanting the ref to shut the hell up. "The Sinner" takes this time to raise up his middle fingers once again into the air, getting a negative response from the crowd as he shows everyone in Niagara Falls how he counts to one on -his- hands. Breslin has recovered at this point and goes over to Duran, looking to continue the fight, as John responds by throwing a right hand: BUT LEO BLOCKS IT! The crowd cheers as Leo blocks Duran's right hand with a right of his own, catching Duran by surprise and sending the Champaign native back a step or two. Breslin hits another right hand, and another, the crowd building with cheers, getting behind Breslin as he begins to lay in blow after blow on Duran. Judge: "Look at Breslin go! That break that he got from the ref was a good one indeed, because he's going to school on Duran now!" Ejiro: "Not like those right hands he's landing are very thunderous on Duran." Annie: "Well, if you're optimistic, like me, you know that this will give Breslin a chance to tag out if he can just put Duran down long enough." Ejiro: "By the way, why was the ref so biased there anyway? Now that Breslin has an advantage, as slim as it is, I point my finger at the ref for being completely unfair." Breslin continues his attack on Duran, hitting "The Sinner" with right hand after right hand and finally getting Duran up on the ropes. Like a prizefighter, Duran tries to guard himself from the blows, but Breslin continues to land them, until finally Leo grabs John's right arm and throws him into the opposite ropes WITH AUTHORITY. John bounces off the ropes and comes hurdling back towards Breslin, extending his arm to clothesline Leo down but Breslin ducks it, nailing Duran in the gut with a solid punch that doubles Duran over, stopping his momentum dead in its tracks. Breslin quickly puts Duran in a front facelock and whips backwards, sending the head of "The Sinner" hard into the mat with a thunk after the DDT. Annie: "Woo! Did you hear the sound Duran's head made when he got that DDT from Breslin? Such a delicious sound!" Ejiro: "Oh no, Judge, Annie is hungry! Someone find Natasha!" Judge: "Heh, getting back on track here, Breslin now needs to get to his corner to tag out to either Conklin or Manson so that the momentum of the good guys can continue." Almost as if on cue, Breslin confidently gets back to his feet and goes over to his corner, slapping the free hand of Danny Conklin, Conklin's other hand wrapped around the tag rope attached to the top turnbuckle. The Niagara crowd gives Danny a respectable pop as he steps through the ropes. Judge: "Sure enough, here comes Danny Conklin, who is in his first main event tonight!" Ejiro: "Annie, do you remember your first time?" Annie: "Eji, I swear to God..." Ejiro: "That is, being in the main event." Danny gets right down to business, noticing that Duran is still down on the mat after the DDT and quickly going over, covering Duran and hooking the leg as the ref swings around to make the count. ONE... KICKOUT! Duran's shoulder is raised quickly, as Conklin just apparently took entirely too long to get that pin on Duran, allowing him time to rest and kick out at a mere count of one. Conklin keeps things moving, flipping Duran over onto his stomach and staying on Duran's right side, grasping a hold of John's right arm. Danny leans back onto Duran's body, wrenching the arm of Duran back as one-half of Two Drink Minimum locks on a reverse armbar. The crowd cheers as Duran winces in pain, the pressure on his arm growing as Conklin leans back into the move more and more, making "The Sinner" squirm towards the nearest ropes. Judge: "This is a position you don't see Duran in that often, on the wrong side of a submission hold." Annie: "If Danny can just lock this move in nice and tight, there will be no escape for Duran!" Ejiro: "Duran didn't become SJL Champion by tapping to moves like this, Annie. No way he's going to start now." Sure enough, John continues to inch closer and closer to the ropes, and Danny can do little to bring Duran back front and center, as Duran lunges for the bottom rope, latching onto it tight as the ref tells Conklin to release the hold, which Danny promptly does to avoid disqualification for his team. The crowd is not pleased with "The Sinner" breaking the hold, letting out a round of boos to show their displeasure and disappointment with the hold being broken so quickly. Judge: "Now -that- is an example by Duran of having ring awareness and knowing how close you are to the ropes." Ejiro: "It also helps that Duran is more experienced than Conklin." Judge: "This much is also true." Conklin doesn't seem to be too frustrated, just continuing with the flow of his offense and bringing Duran to his feet, albeit somewhat slowly due to the size of Duran and the lack of strength from Conklin. Danny attempts to drive a boot into the gut of John, possibly to go for a DDT, but "The Sinner" grabs the boot in mid-kick, forcing Danny to improvise. Conklin does so and shifts his body to the right, bringing his other leg up and slamming it into the back of Duran's head, both men going to the mat. Duran, however, obviously gets the short end of the stick on that exchange. Annie: "Ha! Duran thought he was actually in control there for a second. Good thing Conklin showed Johnny boy who the boss is in the ring right now." Ejiro: "You wish, Annie. Keep your eye on Duran, he's about to whip out a big ol' 3 liter of whoopass." Conklin quickly gets to his feet following the enzuigiri, going to the nearest corner where no bodies are occupying. Conklin climbs up to the second turnbuckle, turning to face "The Sinner" who is facing up towards the lights on his back. The crowd cheers as Danny leaps into the air, coming down on Duran hard with a sharp elbow right into Duran's abdomen, likely knocking the wind out of the champion as Conklin maneuvers himself around into a lateral press on Duran, going for the pinfall. ONE... Solomon steps through the ropes and enters the ring illegally. TWO... NO! Solomon quickly goes over to Conklin and bashes a boot into Danny's head, breaking the pin. The ref gets up from the mat and immediately confronts Solomon, telling Scott to return to his corner with Korgath. Meanwhile, Conklin refuses to let his stranglehold on the offense in this match go, flowing right around to Duran's legs and grabbing Duran's notoriously weak one. Duran fights this off, however, shifting the weight into his legs to kick Conklin away, almost sending Danny into the ref. Judge: "Nice job by Duran to keep Conklin from locking on that half crab." Ejiro: "If there's one thing Duran does consistently, it's finding a way out of at least one submission a match." Annie: "Danny Boy is still in control, though." Duran is slowly getting to his feet, now on one knee as Conklin approaches him. John will have none of that, however, and lashes out an elbow and connecting with Danny's stomach. Ejiro: "What was that about Conklin being in control, Annie?" Annie: "BAH!" As Danny doubles over, holding his stomach, Duran rises to his feet the rest of the way, towering over Conklin before grabbing the back of his head and bringing him upright, crashing a knee into his abdomen to double him over once again. Duran quickly follows this up with a front facelock and a DDT, driving Danny's head into the mat. John decides not to go for the cover, instead bringing Conklin back to his feet and continuing his assault on the Irish man, throwing him into the turnbuckle. Judge: "Conklin into the corner, and he's still a distance away from his partners." Ejiro: "Suits him right, he's supposed to be a fighting Irish man, let's see him fight his way out of this one." Duran goes to the corner opposite Danny and crouches down before quickly taking off towards the turnbuckle to spear the hell out of Conklin. However, Danny moves out of the way, putting two hands on the back of John and attempting to chuck him into the ring post. However, "The Sinner" is experienced with this kind of reversal and manages to stop his momentum enough, blocking the potential blow of the turnbuckles against his chest with his two arms crossed in an X. Annie: "Ouch, Duran was very, very close to going shoulder-first into that ring post. I would've enjoyed seeing that." Ejiro: "We've seen your bondage film collection, we believe you." Duran turns around to face Danny again as Conklin jumps into the air to nail Duran with a dropkick, but "The Sinner" dodges and the attempt misses as Conklin hits the mat. Danny pops right back up and Duran is waiting for him, kicking Conklin in the midsection and doing a 180, placing Danny's head on his shoulder and quickly dropping down, slamming Conklin's head onto Duran's shoulder as it whiplashes off, sending Conklin to the mat once again following the reverse neckbreaker. Ejiro: "Duran's on a roll! Look at him shut Conklin down!" Judge: "This is surprising coming from Duran, since he's been in this match for a long time." With Conklin down, Duran covers him, hooking the leg tightly and looking for the victory as the ref drops to the mat to count the pinfall. ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! The crowd explodes with cheers as Conklin shoots a shoulder up, breaking the pin at 2 ½. Duran can't believe it, beginning to get frustrated but not taking it out on Danny immediately, instead bringing him to his feet and taking him over to the Urban Decay corner, holding up his arm in the air as Duran slaps hands with Solomon, who is grabbing the tag ropes. Scott enters the ring and immediately blasts Conklin in the side with a kick, as Duran doesn't take any crap from the ref and just simply goes to the corner without the ref having to warn him to do so. Ejiro: "Look at that teamwork from Solomon and Duran! This is what sets the Urban Decay team apart from their opponents! They're a cohesive unit, and they know what they're doing in that ring as a team." Annie: "Insightful stuff, Eji." Judge: "Don't start with him, Annie, keep watching the action." Solomon puts Conklin in the corner as his fellow stablemates cheer him on and Janet Quinn looks on from the opposite corner, worried about Danny's safety in the wrong side of the ring. Solomon climbs up to the second rope, towering high above Conklin and bringing up his right hand, balling it into a fist and beginning to rain down punch after punch as the crowd begins to boo. The ref warns Korgath and Duran to stay away from Conklin, but once Solomon hits his ninth punch, the tenth one is a collective three-way blow from all three members of the Urban Decay team as they all nail Conklin in the head/face area. Judge: "Danny looks in a bad way right now, he -really- needs to tag out to either Manson or Breslin, and he needs to do it rather quickly." Annie: "I think Conklin should go for Manson, because I can see it in his eyes that he is just begging for action. Even though the team of Solomon, Korgath and Duran are on a roll right now, if Conklin can just tag out to Manson, he has the opportunity to turn it all around in the favor of his team." Solomon hops off the second rope, keeping Danny on his feet despite Conklin looking like he could use a little rest, grabbing Danny by his arm and sending him into the ropes. Conklin is slow on the rebound, but as he comes off the ropes he catches Scott--who is looking for a Samoan drop--by surprise, twirling through the air and slamming his heel into Solomon's face, the crowd exploding with cheers as Solomon and Conklin both crash to the mat. Annie: "Yes! This is your chance, Danny! Get Manson in the match! Hell, get anyone in the match!" Ejiro: "No! Pass out, Conklin! Take a breather!" Solomon was so surprised by the move that he seems a little disoriented, as it doesn't seem clear where he is rolling. Correcting himself, he begins to move towards the ropes, likely so he can bring himself up using the ropes. Meanwhile, Conklin is closing the gap slowly yet surely between himself and his teammates' corner, a corner which he has not spent a whole lot of time in for this match. As Solomon begins to bring himself up to his feet across the ring, Conklin dives for Manson's outstretched hand, the other hand tightly gripped around the tag rope. SMACK The ref acknowledges the tag as the crowd somehow manages to increase their volume more than they already have. Manson immediately steps through the ropes, the crowd going wild as Solomon gets to his feet and tries to take "Hate Personified" down. Unfortunately for Solomon, he ends up on the wrong side of a big lariat from Manson. Korgath enters the ring but Manson builds up some speed and almost knocks Korgath's head off with a Yakuza kick, sending the big man down and rolling out to the outside to rethink strategy. Duran is the next one to enter the ring as Manson moves to the center of the ring, dodging the attack from "The Sinner" and grabbing him, tossing him over his head and sending John down to the mat with a wicked overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Annie: "What did I tell all of you! Manson is hot right now, and he's taken out the entire Urban Decay team! Go go Manson!" Ejiro: "I hope some of you out there in TV land are recording this, because this is the only time that Annie is ever going to say that a man is hot." Annie: "I dare you to actually call this match sometime, Eji. I don't think you can do it, you're too busy gawking at me and making fun of me for being a lesbian and getting more girls than you got." Ejiro: "Bitch please, I'm in the Magnificent Seven." Annie: "Four. Magnificent Four. Wait, have you lost another member yet? I forget." Judge: "Shut up, both of you. We've got a match going on in the ring." Manson goes over to the legal man in Solomon and brings him up to his feet, before spinning around and connecting a roundhouse kick to the head of Solomon. Solomon is knocked sideways by the kick, but somehow manages to maintain a vertical base. Not to be outdone, Manson delivers yet another roundhouse kick, staggering Solomon into the ropes. Manson is not finished, however, and as Scott comes back out from the ropes, he catches a boot to the midsection, as both of his arms are hooked up into the air and Manson drops down to the mat. Judge: "THRILL KILL! THRILL KILL!" Solomon is planted face-first with the Thrill Kill, and Manson gets to his feet once again, bouncing off the ropes and ignoring the taunts of Urban Decay as he leaps up into the air, tucking his knee in. THUD "OHHHH NO!" Manson's knee goes hard into the back of Solomon's head, and Manson obviously goes for the cover now, after such a blunt knee drop. The referee swings around once again, and the crowd senses that the match is over as the ref begins to count. ONE... TWO... THR-NO! SOLOMON KICKED OUT! SOLOMON KICKED OUT! The crowd is in disbelief and so is Manson, who has a few choice words for the ref before continuing his onslaught of an attack. Judge: "After such an impressive string of brutal moves like that from Manson, it's a miracle that Solomon somehow found something deep inside within him to kick out of it all." Annie: "That is almost surreal endurance from Scotty there." Manson gets to his feet and calls for the Killing Joke as he brings Solomon back to his feet. Manson tries to put Solomon in an inverted facelock, but Scott somehow manages to escape, and Korgath reacts by grabbing the tag rope, meeting hands with Solomon as he lunges across the ring, making the tag. Annie: "...Huh? What just happened?" Ejiro: "Hahah! I bet Manson isn't ready for Korgath!" Judge: "Korgath is truly an intimidating figure, solely based on his size. Scary man." Korgath enters the ring, but Manson isn't one to back down, giving Korgath everything he has, hitting him with blow after blow. However, Korgath doesn't seem to feel a thing and fights back, clubbing Manson in the head with right hand after right hand. Korgath chucks Manson into the ropes and is looking for a back body drop, bending down but not expecting Manson's boot to club him in the face, as Korgath goes down to the mat. Annie: "Yes! Manson's making a comeback!" Manson once again calls for the Killing Joke, and brings Korgath to his feet, putting him in an inverted facelock. Korgath tries to find a way out, and finds one by elbowing Manson in the midsection...or possibly a little lower than the midsection. The crowd boos as they smell foul play, but the ref didn't see anything that looked remotely like foul play, letting the match continue. Annie: "Oh, this is just bull!" Ejiro: "So the referee is a great guy after all! Who would've thunk it?" Korgath quickly captures Manson in a standing headscissors, wrapping his arms around Manson's waist and easily lifting him up, throwing him down with a powerbomb. The crowd lets out a chorus of boos as Korgath calls for his own ending to this match. Judge: "Is THIS it? Are we finally going to see an ending to this match?" Ejiro: "I hope so, because oh, what a sweet ending this will be!" Korgath remains near the chest of Manson and then turns towards it, leaping in the air and bringing all three hundred and fifty pounds down onto Manson. BOOM The impact shakes the ring, and Duran and Solomon enter the ring as soon as the ref goes down to count the pinfall. ONE... Here come Conklin and Breslin to break the pinfall... TWOOOO... But Duran and Solomon cut them off with dual lariats! THREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Annie: "Argh! No!" DING DING DING "ON THE LEFT!" The Niagara Falls crowd is not pleased in the least as "March Of Death" cues up again. Ejiro: "They've done it! The members of Urban Decay are victorious again!" As Conklin and Breslin crawl over to Manson to check on him after getting lariats themselves, Duran and Solomon bring Korgath to his feet, congratulating him. Funyon: "Here are your winners, URBAN DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!" The crowd is overly disappointed at the outcome of this match, continuing to boo Duran, Korgath, and Solomon as all three celebrate in the ring. Annie: "Wow, two bad endings to two shows in a row." Ejiro: "Cheer up, Annie! Everything's alright with the world! Duran is #1, the Urban Decay are dominating! Life is good!" Judge: "It sure is. We hope your lives are going just as good wherever you are, and we hope you all come back on Tuesday for SJL Metal. Until then, goodnight everybody from Niagara Falls!" A shot of the smug looks on the members of Urban Decay fades to a wide shot of the falls, the water rushing down as SJL Crimson comes to a close. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ © 2003 Smartmarks Junior League http://www.theswf.net/ ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest realitycheck Report post Posted August 1, 2003 In the fine tradition of show posting laziness, if you want to know the results, read for yourself. I'm not telling! A bit of a shaky and short show, but oh well. There's always next time. Speaking of which, card should be up... eventually. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
