New Limp Bizkit Reviewed

[Skywarp! 0]

from allmusic.com...

 

It took a long, long time for Limp Bizkit to get their follow-up to Chocolate Starfish and the Hotdog Flavored Water into the stores. First, guitarist Wes Borland, generally regarded as the band's musical force, up and left the band, and it took a long, long time to find a replacement guitarist. After a national talent search performed at Guitar Center stores, where candidates had to sign contracts that gave up their rights to anything original they played at their audition, they settled on former Snot guitarist Mike Smith and recorded an album. Then scrapped it. Then they recorded another album. Then scrapped it. They were going through album titles, too — it was called Bipolar then, charmingly, Panty Sniffer. Finally, all the sessions and the turmoil was whittled down into one very long, very bad album called Results May Vary. Part of its weakness stems from two perennial Limp Bizkit problems: for a metal band they sound, well, limp, and in Fred Durst they have the worst frontman in the history of rock. These two things plagued even their hits, but Borland at least gave the band some ideas. Without him, the band is left to flounder, and Durst, who already dominated the band's personality, not only has to provide the bravado, but he has to give it direction — which is likely why it took so long for this mess to get released. Durst doesn't come up with any new musical ideas, apart from slight hints of Staind and emo on the ballads, but the album doesn't suffer from recycled musical ideas, since they were already doing that on Chocolate Starfish. No, it suffers from an utter lack of form and direction, from the riffs to the rhythms, and a surplus of stolen ideas. "The Only One" cops the opening of Steve Miller's "Take the Money and Run," "Gimme the Mic" plagiarizes the Beastie Boys' "Pass the Mic" down to rhyming "y'all" with "y'all" (but Durst adds a whole lotta "motherf*ckers"), while "Phenomenon" borrows from several rap songs, highlighted by Durst getting lyrics wrong. And this points out the biggest problem of Results May Vary — Durst is running amuck, flattening down the production into a grey sludge, then writing inane lyrics that are shocking in their banality.

Since Durst has ingratiated himself with Hollywood, inexplicably getting Thora Birch to concede to being berated to in the video for "Eat You Alive" and French kissing Halle Berry in the video for "Behind Blue Eyes," maybe he's not such a bad guy in person, but on record he's a mean, vindictive, hateful idiot, spewing undirected bile at undeserving targets. Here, a prominent target seems to be Britney Spears, who unceremoniously dumped the dude after an affair that lasted less than a week, since she wasn't all that thrilled that he revealed her pubic hair grooming on the Howard Stern show (what a guy!). Now, he's hurt and ranting about how she broke his heart, unaware of his own culpability in the affair. But that's par for the course for Durst, who stumbles through life without realizing the consequences of his actions, then whines about how nobody understands him. Here, he complains about being picked on in high school, not realizing that his blustering aggression makes him a bully (and that's not even accounting for how he unwittingly incited violence and destruction at Woodstock '99). Then, he complains several times about radio and MTV playing the same old bands, willfully ignoring that he's whored himself out to MTV numerous times and that his band received their radio breakthrough by paying to get their songs played. He invokes icons callously — "ease your pain/like a melody from Kurt Cobain" — most notably on a boneheaded cover of the Who's "Behind Blue Eyes," turning it into a Staind song with a Speak & Spell on the bridge ("B-I-Z-K-I-T. Say it") and adding insult to injury by misspelling Pete Townshend's name in the credits. And this isn't even counting the embarrassing Apple plug in the liner notes, or the Fight Club reference in the artwork, the obviousness of which suggests that Durst would be one of the brainwashed legions chanting "his name is Robert Paulson" instead of thinking for himself. Like before, some of this could have been palatable if the music had a fraction of his anger (no matter how misguided it is) or had some energy to it instead of just being murky emoting. But since the music has no melody, hooks, or energy, all attention is focused on the clown jumping up and down and screaming in front, and long before the record is over, you're left wondering, how the hell did he ever get to put this mess out? — Stephen Thomas Erlewine

[Guest Random Hero]

Cue 4 pages of Limp Bizkit bashing...

 

I don't get all the Limp Bizkit bashing, there are far worse Nu Metal bands around, the likes of Spineshank, Saliva and Papa Roach to mention but 3.

 

I can't comment on the album having not heard it. Although I've heard 'Eat You Alive' and I like it quite a bit.

 

I wouldn't expect to see many positive reviews of this album, as magazines and such would probably be too worried about their credibility to ever listen to anything Limp Bizkit produces objectively (even magazines such as Kerrang, who have no credibility anyway). Fred Durst is NOT the worst frontman in the history of rock. He's obviously not everyones cup of tea, but he's far from the worst frontman ever.

 

Also what the fuck does misspelling Pete Townshends name have to do with the quality of the album?

 

This album may be a steaming pile of turd, but I'll give them a chance before I make my judgment.

Edited September 23, 2003 by Random Hero

[Corey_Lazarus 0]

Durst is definitely in the running for worst frontman. Not from a live standpoint, because he has TONS of charisma, especially on stage, but from a non-music standpoint. He's a whining bitch, and makes idle threats constantly, and then complains when people call him on it.

 

Durst is nothing but a media whore who got popular by letting Wes do the hard work.

[Guest Random Hero]

I agree, Durst is an idiot. He has a major chip on his shoulder, and I don't know why. But on stage he definitely has charisma, he's not much of a singer, but he's definitely not the worst frontman of all time.

[Jobber of the Week 0]

Eh.. The Mania 19 song is gone. I guess I got to hear the only live performance of that. Whoopie.

[Steviekick 0]

I hate so many of the trendy emo and pop bunk bands right now that I actually wanted this album to do well, just because I hate that type of music more than I hate Fred Durst. At least Limp Biskit is unintentionally entertaining.

[Jobber of the Week 0]

Eh, Fred spent too much time wembling over the album and Linkin Park came and stole the ANGSTROCK!!!!!!!1111111111 crown. And that's not been as successful as it is right now either.

 

 

Right now it's all about "punk" bands talking about how against the establishment they are while airing hourly on MTV.

[Guest Nanks]

Whilst I did enjoy some of Chocolate Starfish etc. etc. mainly because Wes has talent, I am nothing but surprised that Results May Vary is rubbish. I don't mind Eat You Alive, but I heard Behind Blue Eyes for the first time on the radio yesterday, and ugh. It is really not good, so much so it prompted me to call the radio station (the only rock-only station in my city) and beg them not to play it again. So not only is Durst more of a painful, media whore then ever before, he also has no music talent.

[Guest Doyo]

I was watching part of this special on mtv today where they followed Durst around

with cameras during the months of recording the album. He was in the studio with

a guitar and actually said something like "I try to come up with stuff, but then I realize

I don't know how to play this thing. I suck." So then he tried to write some lyrics and

was like "I'm not Eminem, I can't do this." So then he goes off and parties. Then he

is shown lounging at the pool with a notepad. He ended up with four lines of lyrics

at the end of the day.

[Guest El Satanico]

Durst is shit and their only decent album was the first album and it wasn't anything great either.

[Guest Choken One]

I was watching part of this special on mtv today where they followed Durst around

with cameras during the months of recording the album. He was in the studio with

a guitar and actually said something like "I try to come up with stuff, but then I realize

I don't know how to play this thing. I suck." So then he tried to write some lyrics and

was like "I'm not Eminem, I can't do this." So then he goes off and parties. Then he

is shown lounging at the pool with a notepad. He ended up with four lines of lyrics

at the end of the day.

I caught that as well...It was interesting to say the least...

 

The album sucked even with the Neptunes on it? HOLY SHIT. That's bad...

 

 

This will be the last album as LB will split and Fred becomes AXL ROSE 2.0 only without the talent...

[Steviekick 0]

If even the Neptunes can't help, than LB are doomed.

[Guest El Satanico]

If even the Neptunes can't help, than LB are doomed.

I thought the "The Neptunes rule" was that everything they touched turned into a hit?

 

I didn't think the "The Neptunes rule" was that everything they touched became a good song even if it already sucked.

[Steviekick 0]

I was thinking more like if even the Neptunes can't help LP make songs worthy of being singles/hits, than the albums is doomed.

[River City Rocker 0]

Also what the fuck does misspelling Pete Townshend's name have to do with the quality of the album?

Some critics, particularly Stephen Thomas Erlewine, are quite picky in that kind of way. It may suggest to the obsessive music geeks that a young, dumb musician misspelling a name of a legend in the music business is disrespectful, maybe?

 

-Ben

[Guest Eagan469]

Eh.. The Mania 19 song is gone. I guess I got to hear the only live performance of that. Whoopie.

"Crack Addict" is indeed not on the album.

 

However, the studio version of it did get leaked.

 

Here's the unreleased track for your listening pleasure:

http://members.lycos.co.uk/WWEorums/Limp%...%20Version).mp3

[Use Your Illusion 0]

Fred Durst is still alive!?

[Cartman 0]

Well let me be the first, and probably ONLY person here to say I like Durst, his music, and all those bands mentioned in the second post.

 

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I can't wait to hate this.

[Guest mesepher]

Also what the fuck does misspelling Pete Townshend's name have to do with the quality of the album?

Some critics, particularly Stephen Thomas Erlewine, are quite picky in that kind of way. It may suggest to the obsessive music geeks that a young, dumb musician misspelling a name of a legend in the music business is disrespectful, maybe?

 

-Ben

musician?

[Use Your Illusion 0]

I can't wait to hate this.

Enough to rant about it?

[PLAGIARISM! 0]

Without having heard the record, I can safely say with complete objectivity that it is goat-blowingly awful.

[Guest Choken One]

How has Durst's pet projects avoided sucking AS much as he does?

[Mecha Mummy 0]

Eh.. The Mania 19 song is gone. I guess I got to hear the only live performance of that. Whoopie.

Well, I enjoyed that live performance... because my friend and I had made "Fred Durst Sucks" and "News Flash: Durst Can't Rap" signs for the occasion.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I can't wait to hate this.

Enough to rant about it?

Depends on how much I'm exposed to it. I don't really know anyone that can tolerate Limp Bizkit aside from my idiot brother who buys every horrible nu metal album in existence. If he gets it, I might just have to listen to it and react accordingly.

[Skywarp! 0]

I can't wait to hate this.

Enough to rant about it?

Depends on how much I'm exposed to it. I don't really know anyone that can tolerate Limp Bizkit aside from my idiot brother who buys every horrible nu metal album in existence. If he gets it, I might just have to listen to it and react accordingly.

You can listen to clips at www.limpbizkit.com.

[Guest Agent of Oblivion]

I don't want to hear it that bad.

[caboose 0]

Well I got a copy of the new LB album free when I purchased Muse's new album and John William's Greatest Hits yesterday.

 

Even though it was free, I feel like I got screwed.

 

Its that bad.

 

Really.

[Red Hot Thumbtack In The Eye 0]

I'm shocked

[Cartman 0]

Oh my god you people are sad. seriously.