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The Dames' Diatribe on NWA:TNA - 9/3/03

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Guest TSMAdmin

The Dames’ Diatribe on NWA:TNA – September 3, 2003



Welcome back to your usual hot spot for NWA:TNA reviews…as I’m back on schedule.


Now that Bob Barron is back at school in Toronto, I needed someone to hook me up with NWA:TNA tapes, but someone did something for me that was even better. Turns out that my best friend Keith Alexander JUST got digital cable at his place two weeks ago…and they carry TNA! So, from now on, hopefully every week, I’ll be able to put up my TNA Diatribe’s the night the show airs. No more lateness, yay!


However, there is but one condition. As a reward for helping me out, I’ve agreed to plug my best friends’ site every week, KeithAlexanderOnline.com, as a means to get him some more hits. So go check it out and see if you two have anything in common…and leave him some feedback while you’re at it.


Well, now that that’s out of the way, let’s get down to business.


Last week, TNA let us know that tonight would be an absolutely loaded card with a one-night single elimination X Division Tournament taking place as well as a Wargames main event. I’m looking forward to it just as much as you are…


I almost KILL my best friend as the PPV doesn’t start airing until RIGHT before the opening video package takes place. That’s right…no FBI warning this time. Not that I care, but for a second there, I thought the PPV didn’t order properly.


We go to a video package on the events leading up to Erik Watts making tonight’s Wargames main event. After the clips of last week’s show, we get quick snippets from the wrestlers involved (I almost said “superstars”… WWE is getting to me) including Chris Daniels, AMW, AJ Styles with Vince Russo, D’Lo Brown.


We head to the ring immediately for our first match up.


Mad Mikey vs. Lazz


Match Background: Lazz is making his pay per view debut against Mad Mikey, who has been hyped up lately in a series of funny vignettes. This will be Mikey’s second official match in TNA, losing his first match up to Elix Skipper about a month ago.


The Match: Lazz is a face-painted guy who acts mighty effeminate…and no, it’s not the former Miss TNA, Bruce. He walks down the ramp gyrating to his music, wearing low-rider jeans and a halter top. Maybe it’s just me, but I’ve never found gay gimmicks entertaining.


There’s a great sign in the crowd as Mikey makes his way down the aisle: “Mikey is Mad at his gimmick”. Lazz locks up with Mikey and goes for a go-behind, but his wandering hands causes Mikey to get away, ASAP. Mikey takes Lazz down, who positions himself face first under Mikey, so he backs away again. Lazz looks at Mikey across the ring and lays down, almost as if he’s inviting him to get on top. The former Crash Holly comes charging with a running elbow, but Lazz gets out of the way and goes for a clothesline. Mikey ducks and connects with a shoulder block. He comes off the ropes again, but Lazz gets a Lou Thesz press…and then starts humping Mikey. I shit you not. Needless to say, Mikey gets him off and runs towards one of the corners.


Lazz grabs Mikey from behind, who’s holding onto the ring post and tries to pull him out of the corner as the ref tries to pull Lazz out…so it looks like some three way sex is going on. Make your own jokes, I’m too lazy today.


Mikey gets away and Lazz goes for a hiptoss, but it’s blocked. Mikey goes for one of his own, which is also blocked and then Lazz kisses Mikey! Mikey gets mad and goes after Lazz with a fury and hits a NASTY double arm DDT to put him away.


Winner: Mad Mikey


My Opinion: I’m pretty sure that I’ve asked this before, but what is it with gay gimmicks in wrestling? They almost never work and result in pretty lousy matches as the gimmick overshadows the wrestling involved, if any. My only guess was this guy was brought in as a one-shot to put Mikey over, considering they don’t have anyone else Mikey’s size that they’d like to sacrifice. Either way, it was a DUD.


We go to Mike Tenay and Don West as we see the big trophy that the winner of the Super X Division Tournament will win. I wonder if that trophy will end up trashed within the next two weeks. The brackets are revealed for tonight’s tournament and they are still the same as they were last week.


In the first round, Juventud Guerrera, representing Mexico, will be facing Nosawa, representing Japan. Jonny Storm, representing the UK, will be squaring off against Canada’s Teddy Hart, who’s name alone brings forth high expectations.


In the other bracket, Jerry Lynn will take on Chris Sabin as the current X Division Champion Michael Shane takes on Frankie Kazarian. This tournament is bracketed so that it will definitely be one of the four men representing the US in the finals.


We go to Terry Taylor in the back with Dusty Rhodes, who talks about tonight’s Wargames. As Dusty talks…I can’t HELP but look at Terry Taylor who looks like he’s about to die of laughter! Dusty spews his usual nonsense and then RANDOMLY says that he kicked Arn Anderson’s ass in Wargames matches. Ahh…good ol’ Dusty Rhodes. He’s entertaining for all the wrong reasons.


Juventud Guerrera vs. Nosawa in the first round of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: Juventud is making his return to TNA after a one-shot a couple of months ago against Jerry Lynn. Nosawa is making his debut in the promotion.


The Match: Juvi comes to the ring with the generic Hispanic music that the SAT’s & Red come out to. Juvi, being the X Division wrestler with the most exposure being brought in tonight gets a big pop from the crowd during his entrance. He leads the crowd in a small “Juice” chant as he makes his way down the ramp.


Nosawa comes down the aisle to virtually no reaction.


They lock up and go at a quick pace as they run the ropes until Juvi gets a bulldog to start off the contest. He ducks a clothesline and hits a spinning wheel kick, sending Nosawa to the outside. He fakes going to the outside with a 619, but springboards off the top with a plancha to the floor. On the outside now, Juvi lays in some chops before tossing Nosawa back into the ring. Juvi motions to the crowd while he’s on the apron and pays for it as Nosawa attacks and attempts to suplex him back in. Juvi reverses it and goes behind him, but that is reversed as well and Nosawa tries a German Suplex, but Juvi lands on his feet. Nosawa turns around right into a spinning back kick for two. Juvi whips Nosawa into the far corner and gives chase, but Nosawa moves out of the way of a charging Guerrera and superkicks him down.


Nosawa picks up Juvi and they run the ropes (quickly!) trying to get the advantage on the other before Nosawa is able to land a dropkick to the knee of Juventud. Nosawa kicks the HELL out of Juvi in the head, Tajiri-style as Juvi gets up for a two count. Juventud gets up and fires off some chops in the corner but ends up irish whipped into the far corner. Nosawa gives chase and EATS BOOT, so Juvi spins him around and his a Pump Handle Sit Out Face First Slam! Juvi sets him up…and hits the Juvi Elbow for two! Don West marks out for it, but I’m not sure if he realizes that it’s a blatant rip off of The Rock.


Juvi goes for a sunset flip as he comes off the ropes, but Nosawa rolls through and connects with a basement dropkick to the face! That gets a two count before Nosawa goes for a belly to back suplex, but Juvi lands on his feet. Juvi turns Nosawa around and hits the JUVI DRIVER~! but doesn’t go for the pinfall! He sets him up in the corner and hits the 450 SPLASH~! ONE…TWO…THREE!


Winner: Juventud Guerrera


My Opinion: Good, albeit short match with Juvi getting most of the offense in. Nosawa didn’t get to show much though and I’m sure he was just brought in as cannon fodder for Juvi in the first round. **


In the back, Terry Taylor is with Father James Mitchell. He asks Mitchell when his vendetta with Raven will be over. Mitchell says that “enough is never enough” as he plans on teaching Raven about real pain and suffering. He says that Raven doesn’t really care about anyone else…so what does he have to lose, right? Mitchell says that Raven can lose his self image, which is why they’re going to show him real loss when they cut off his hair.


Glen Gilberti interrupts Mitchell because he’s concerned about Shane Douglas teaming with Simon Diamond and Johnny Swinger tonight in the Wargames match. He wants to make sure that his guys don’t get hurt in the cage, so they need to get their priorities straight. Mitchell agrees and then Gilberti directs some comments at Dusty Rhodes, telling him that he better not get involved in their business tonight.


We now go to the ring for the second contest in the Super X Division Tourney.


Teddy Hart vs. Jonny Storm in the first round of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: Personally speaking, this is the match that I’m mostly looking forward tonight because of who is in it. Teddy Hart is the nephew is Bret and Owen Hart (as well as about a billion other Hart brothers) and he’ll be making his TNA debut tonight. I don’t know much about him, but his name carries a legacy and I’m interested if this kid has any similarities to his uncles. Bret is my favorite wrestler of all time and my favorite match of all time happens to be Bret Hart vs. Owen Hart from Wrestlemania X, so this kid has a lot to live up to.


Jonny Storm on the other hand is making his return to TNA after making a couple of appearances in the X Division a few months ago.


The Match: WHAT…THE…FUCK?!


My mouth has absolutely hit the floor as Teddy Hart walks down the ramp, looking more like a member of the music group Orgy mixed with Max Moon than a Hart family member. Seriously, the kid has multi-colored dreadlocks and is wearing silver/chrome shorts and kneepads with soft spikes poking out of them. Oh man…


Jonny Storm comes charging into the ring only to be attacked by Hart at the bell with some boots. Hart picks up Storm and delivers some BEAUTIFUL punches before whipping him into the ropes. He picks up Storm for an Ocean Cyclone Suplex, but Storm counters and nails a DDT, spiking Hart down! Storm then connects with a front dropkick, sending Teddy Hart to the floor. Storm leaps off the top turnbuckle with a somersault plancha on Teddy, who catches Storm SQUARE and HARD in the chest! A replay is shown and deservedly so as the crowd erupts in a “TNA” chant. He tosses Teddy back in and comes off the top, but Hart catches him with a Diamond Cutter on the way down!


He picks Storm up and puts him in a headlock before quickly putting him down with a QUICK Fujiwara armbar that just looked painful! Storm bails out of the ring after getting to the ropes as Tenay compares Teddy’s style to Owen’s when he was just starting out. Storm makes his way towards the ramp as Hart leaps onto the apron. He kicks Storm back and looks to go for an Asai Moonsault…but he does it off the top with PERFECTION! The kid got tons of elevation and landed square on Storm, prompting a “Holy Shit” chant by the crowd…and I’m following along! THAT gets a replay as Teddy plays to the crowd. He tosses Storm back into the ring and goes for a clothesline, but Storm catches him and flips him down in some sort of sit out powerbomb for two!


Teddy goes to the top, moonsaulting back, but Teddy moves out of the way! Teddy goes to the top as Storm gets up and leaps off onto him….hitting him with a BIG DDT! Seriously, he landed on Storm and then shifted his weight backwards to spike him down! (A friend of mine used to do the move and called it the Suicide Spike.) That earns ANOTHER “Holy Shit” chant from the crowd, but Teddy says that he’s not done! He motions to the crowd again and heads back up top for a Picture Perfect SHOOTING STAR PRESS! ONE…TWO…THREE!


Winner: Teddy Hart


My Opinion: I’ll admit, I was very taken aback by Teddy Hart’s look, but DAMN, this kid has a hell of a lot of talent. He’s flashier than Owen and especially Bret, but we haven’t been able to see his technical wrestling ability just yet. He sells quite well and has some gorgeous punches and I can’t WAIT to see more of this kid. **1/4.


In the back, Terry Taylor is with Sonny Siaki and Trinity. He’s in the locker room with Simon and Swinger, playing up his old character where he thought he was in charge of S.E.X. and tells the others what to do. Simon and Swinger don’t exactly care to hear whatever “encouraging” advice Siaki has to give, so they threaten to beat his head in. Before things can escalate, Shane Douglas comes in and cuts an intense promo on the fact that tonight, someone might get hurt, so they all need to get their game faces on and be a unit. I LOVE Douglas on the mic, especially when he’s ranting and raving, so any excuse for him to speak is a good one.


Chris Sabin vs. Jerry Lynn in the first round of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: Chris Sabin and Jerry Lynn have wrestled before, when Sabin was the X Division Champion, with Sabin coming out the victor by nefarious means. Sabin actually won the X Title in a three way dance between himself, Lynn and the Champion at the time, the Amazing Red (who is currently injured).


The Match: As Lynn comes into the ring, Sabin attacks him right off the bat with punches and boots and knocks him down with a back elbow. Lynn gets up and nails Sabin down with a clothesline before connecting with some right hands of his own. Sabin rakes the eyes to go back on the offense and whips Lynn into the corner, following him in with a knee to the midsection. He whips Lynn into the far corner and gives chase, but Lynn moves out of the way, so Sabin jumps onto the 2nd rope. Lynn jumps up with him and connects with a sunset flip powerbomb off the 2nd rope for two!


Lynn works over Sabin with some punches, but gets whipped into the ropes. Sabin goes after him, only to get tossed to the floor. Lynn goes to send him back into the ring, but Sabin drops Lynn throat first over the top and sunset flips his way back in. Lynn holds onto the ropes, but the referee kicks him arm away in a spot that almost always reversed for heels using the ropes. Sabin only gets two out of that and then sets Lynn up for looks to be a VERTEBREAKER~!, but Lynn counters quickly. Lynn hits the TKO and gets a two count of it because Sabin gets his foot on the ropes!


Lynn gets upset with the official and hooks him from behind when Don Callis’ voice is suddenly heard over the PA system. He’s at the top of the ramp and says that if he hurts the official, he’ll be fired! Sabin hits Lynn from behind with a kick to the nads and then covers Lynn as if he just completed a sunset flip to fool the official! The ref gets into position and counts to three, awarding the match to Sabin.


Winner: Chris Sabin


My Opinion: I didn’t think they’d sacrifice Sabin so early in the X Division Tournament, so I saw the Callis interference/distraction coming as an excuse to keep Lynn strong. With the way Sabin lost the X Title in the Ultimate X match and wasn’t involved in the decision, if he won the tournament, it would give him a legitimate gripe with the champion, not that he doesn’t have one already. He’ll either be facing the champion, Michael Shane, in the next round or facing his rival Frankie Kazarian…which would mean that the champion will be taken out in the first round. Hmm? The match was pretty short and the ending marred it, but hopefully this is the only unclean finish of the night. *1/4


In the back, Terry Taylor is with Raven and the Gathering. Taylor tells Raven about Mitchell’s plan to cut off his hair and asks for comments. Raven says that his dream of being the NWA World Champion has just been postponed, not eliminated. He knows that he’s going to have to take out the New Church and Douglas before he can go after the title again. Punk and Julio can take care of the New Chuch, according to Raven, leaving Douglas and Mitchell all to himself. The biggest mistake they’ve made is “showing their hand”, because now he knows what they want…and that makes Raven even more dangerous now. Raven is VERY insistent that they will NOT cut his hair….


Frankie Kazarian vs. Michael Shane in the first round of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: This isn’t the first time that Kazarian and Shane have faced each other in TNA rings. They were both in the X Division Title picture when Sabin was the champion and faced each other in a ladder match to determine the number one contender, but that ended in a no contest when Sabin interfered. Kazarian was literally inches away from grabbing the X Title in the Ultimate X match two weeks ago when Shane blew right past him to grab the title and become the champion. Tonight, the title isn’t on the line…only bragging rights.


The Match: Michael Shane didn’t bring the X Title with him for this match, which I found pretty damn odd.


They lock up and Shane gets the losing end of a series of armdrags by Kazarian before he connects with a dropkick as well. Shane, sitting in the corner, then gets another dropkick to the chest by Kazarian and he comes running towards him. Kazarian goes for a headlock, but Shane connects with a belly to back suplex to take over. Shane pounds him in the corner and hits two consecutive backbreakers for two. Kazarian comes off the ropes with a school boy for two and also gets a two count off of a backslide. Kazarian this a back body drop and a pair of clotheslines before mounting Shane in the corner with some punches.


Kazarian charges at Shane in the corner and EATS BOOT, but snap powerslams Shane for a close two count! Kazarian goes for a suplex, but Shane floats over and hits an enziguiri! Shane sets up for Sweet Shane Music, but it’s blocked and Kazarian goes for Wave of the Future. Shane blocks that and goes for a powerbomb of sorts, but Kazarian ranas him down and hooks the legs for a ONE…TWO…THREE!


Winner: Frankie Kazarian


My Opinion: I like the fact that Kazarian moved forward because now we’ll get a blow off between Sabin and Kazarian as well as Shane having to deal with the fact that he was pinned by Kazarian. Should Kazarian NOT be the winner of the tournament, then Shane will have multiple contenders for the title and the X Division will be rockin’ once again. The match itself was once again short, but hopefully, they’ll give some more time to the semi’s. *3/4.


In the back, Terry Taylor is with AJ Styles and Vince Russo. Styles makes some interesting points, storyline wise, about how he’s beaten everyone that has been put in front of him, so Erik Watts is now looking to hurt him by putting him in a cage match that he feels he shouldn’t be in. It’s just to warm him up for the next wave of upcoming challengers and he feels that isn’t fair. Russo says that he’s not on a team tonight because everyone wants the title. The only person on Styles’ side…is Russo himself.


Juventud Guerrera vs. Teddy Hart in the semi-finals of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: Juvi advanced in the tournament with a win over Nosawa as Teddy Hart advanced with a win over Jonny Storm. The winner will face the winner of the Sabin/Kazarian match.


The Match: Thankfully, Teddy Hart comes to the ring with different attire as he has some beige MC Hammer-ish pants on.


Juvi once again gets a big pop on the way to the ring and is obviously the favorite in the match up.


The fans chant for Juvi at first, but then switch their chant to “Teddy…Teddy” when he plays to the crowd. They shake hands and get ready to lock up.


They get to it and start a FAST irish whip sequence that ends in a tilt a whirl attempt by Teddy get reversed into a DDT, albeit a bit sloppy. Juvi leaps off the top…but Teddy catches him in a Fujiwara armbar! Teddy rolls through it (and could have transitioned it into a Crossface if he wanted), but instead transitions it into a Russian Leg Sweep, ala Bret! He holds onto the arm as he rolls through and goes for it again. Juvi turns it around only for Teddy to twist his way back to a Fujiwara armbar! Ok…this kid IS technically sound!


The fans are LOUD as they chant “TNA” for Teddy as he delivers some more of those gorgeous punches in the corner. Juvi gets off some chops, but Teddy rakes the eyes like a good heel and whips him to the far corner. He gives chase, only to EAT BOOT and then take a head scissors off the 2nd rope. Teddy goes to the outside and Juvi fakes going to the outside, but Hart trips him up and pulls him out. He hits a head scissors on Juvi on the outside and then hits a gorgeous moonsault off the steel guard rail on Juvi, who was lying on the floor for another “TNA” chant!


Juvi heads towards the ramp, so Teddy gets on the apron, looking for his top rope Asai Moonsault, but Juvi pulls him down, making Teddy SMASH his face on it! Juvi then goes flying over the top onto the apron and springboards himself with a cross body to the outside!


Teddy Hart EARNS MY FUCKING LOVE AND ADORATION by bumping off a chop on the FLOOR! I just marked out beyond belief! Both men are on the apron now, but Juvi crotches Teddy as he tries to springboard himself. Juvi rana’s Teddy back into the ring and goes for the cover! ONE…TWO…NO!


Juvi has a distinct way of going for the pin, arching his opponent back so that every nearfall LOOKS like a nearfall. I LOVE IT. Juvi hits his Pump Handle Sit Out Face First Slam and gets a nearfall…but Teddy Hart reverses it IN MID NEARFALL for a two count of his own! It’s official…I LOVE TEDDY HART.


Juvi picks up Teddy for a powerbomb but Teddy lands on his feet, picks up Juvi across his back (almost like a Kryptonite Krunch) and kneels for what looks to be a devastating move! He’s slow to make the cover, so he just drags him towards the corner. He heads towards the top…and hits a TWISTING CORKSCREW PLANCHA to perfection on him! ONE…TWO….NO!!!! I bought that as a finish, the crowd did and so did YOU at home, don’t you DARE LIE!


Juvi goes to the outside and Teddy hits his Top Rope Asai Moonsault! The fans are chanting “Holy Shit” as Teddy gets up….and his knee looks to be hurt. He pulls up his pants, as well as his kneepads and if this kid is selling, I’ve got to give him MAJOR props, cuz he looks hurt. Teddy gets on the apron, clutching his leg when Juvi goes after him. Teddy hits a shoulder block and tries for a sunset flip but Juvi catches him and tosses him right down powerbomb style. Teddy gets up and goes for a sunset flip off the ropes, but Juvi rolls through EXTREMELY quick and connects with a basement dropkick to the face for two!! Juvi goes for the Juvi elbow, but Teddy gets out of the way. Juvi still drops the elbow in the only really bad spot of the match so far, but it doesn’t matter right now as Teddy goes for a clothesline only to get Rock Bottomed to HELL by Juvi!! ONE…TWO….NO!!!


Juvi picks Teddy up and hits a spinning Torture Rack sit out powerbomb…and goes for the two count. Teddy reverses the pinfall in MID NEAR FALL (I’m LOVING IT!) and locks Juvi in a head scissors!! Juvi gets out of it and picks up Teddy for the Juvi Driver near the corner, but Teddy flips over and comes off the top with his Spike DDT! ONE…TWO…NO!!!!


Even the crowd is on Teddy Hart’s side right now as they’re chanting “That was Three” and popping for everything the kid is doing. He heads up top to end up and hits the SHOOTING STAR PRESS~! He hurt his knee though! DAMMIT! If Juvi wins this way, it’ll be well deserved. Juvi picks him up and hits the JUVI DRIVER~! He heads up top for the 450, but Teddy Hart NIPS UP (Damn…this kid can sell then, huh?) and crotches Juvi down! He goes up for a rana, but Juvi punches him and sets him up….and hits a TOP ROPE JUVI DRIVER~! ONE…TWO….THREE!!


Winner: Juventud Guerrera


My Opinion: I just finished standing up and applauding my damned TV and so should you. This kid has exceeded and surpassed my expectations in ways I didn’t think possible! The kid is an excellent high flyer, he has technical ability, he has a unique, marketable look, he can fucking sell and bump his ASS off…and he just put in a GREAT match on national TV on his debut! What MORE could you ask for!?


I’ll admit, I haven’t marked out like this in QUITE some time and I would purchase this show multiple times over just to rewatch this match. This is one for the highlight reels and “Best Of’s” and if it doesn’t get the props it deserves, I’ll be PISSED.


By the end of the match, it really didn’t matter who won as both men were super over and I’m not disappointed by the outcome. Juventud is a bigger name nationally, so that’s probably why he’s in the finals.


TNA…Please listen to me. I know you read my work. BRING BACK TEDDY HART AND SIGN HIM TO A LONG CONTRACT!


As far as the actual match went, the way I’m talking, you’d think that I’d go for the full monty and issue the five stars. However, the blown Juvi elbow spot, the sloppy tilt a whirl DDT in the beginning and the nip up (which nullified most of the selling of the knee by Teddy) drag it down slightly. I’m going with ****1/2…but I feel BAD about that. I wouldn’t argue with anyone if they said that I’m underrating it.


And I’m spent. But there’s more, so I have to keep on trucking.


We now go to an Interrogation segment with Tenay and West…and the Red Shirt Security, Ryan Wilson and Kevin Northcutt. Northcutt answers all the questions, which revolve around “authority” and who respects it. They’re favorable towards all of the heels, unquestionably siding with them. Wilson just says “That is the last word” before both men walk out..


Chris Sabin vs. Frankie Kazarian in the semi-finals of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: This is another series of matches between these two and their heated rivalry…but it’s no longer about the X Division Title. Frankie Kazarian faced Chris Sabin in a GREAT non-title match on the June 25th show, pinning Chris Sabin and kick starting a feud for the title that just ended in the Ultimate X Match. They went back and forth, with Kazarian always coming up inches short due to the crafty mind of Sabin, always finding a way to win. A win over Sabin would do wonders for Kazarian as he would hold victories over Sabin and Shane in one night, making him possibly the number one contender for the title. A win by Sabin would shoot him right back up there…but Juventud Guerrera will be waiting for both men. All I’m hoping for now is a clean, decisive finish.


The Match: The fans chant “Hail Sabin” as Sabin makes his way to the ring. The “Once Upon A Time In Mexico” star comes charging into the ring with a purpose as he starts slugging away at Sabin. Kazarian goes for a hiptoss, which is blocked so he turns it into a clothesline and puts Sabin down with a series of dropkicks. He hits a leg lariat and gets a two count before sending him into the corner and hitting his swinging dropkick. Sabin blows a nip up out of the corner and takes Kazarian down with some mounted punches. Sabin drives him head first into the turnbuckles before charging at him with a pair of knees and tossing him to the floor!


Kazarian gets to the apron as Sabin goes to fly at him, tripping him up on the ropes. Sabin, now on the apron, gets DDT’ed on it as Kazarian slingshots himself to the floor!!!


Kazarian rolls him into the ring for two and sends him into the corner, where Sabin jumps onto the apron to escape him as he charges. Kazarian nails a kick to the midsection and hits the sunset flip powerbomb off the apron to the FLOOR! Sabin’s head hit the RAMP! OUCH!


Kazarian once again rolls him into the ring and gets a two count out of it. Kazarian jumps on the ropes to go for a springboard back elbow, but Sabin catches him and plants him with a German Suplex! Kazarian gets up and goes towards Sabin, who’s in the corner still holding his head from the powerbomb to the floor. He tries to pull him out of the corner but Sabin twists himself, causing Kazarian to hit his head on the turnbuckle. TIGER SUPLEX~! by Sabin gets a close nearfall! Sabin hooks on a Straight Jacket submission hold, but Kazarian gets to the ropes to escape. Kazarian whips Sabin into the ropes and follows him, catching Sabin on his shoulders and going for Back to the Future. Sabin gets off of him, but Kazarian goes for a Tornado DDT instead. Sabin tries to place Kazarian on the top and ends up getting caught on the ropes in a choke instead. The ref makes them break it and Kazarian springboards himself across the ring at Sabin…only to get kneed in the midsection. Sabin goes for the Future Shock, but Kazarian moves out of the way and hits the Wave of the Future! ONE…TWO…NO!!!


Sabin whips Kazarian into the far corner and gives chase, but once again…EATS BOOT. Kazarian, sitting on the top turnbuckle, hooks him in an inverted DDT position, but Sabin leaps backwards and hits a kick to Kazarian’s FACE! WOW!


Sabin hooks on FUTURE SHOCK~! off the top…and HITS IT! ONE…TWO…NO! Sabin heads to the top now as Kazarian gets up…but Kazarian isn’t able to crotch Sabin! Sabin picks Kazarian up to the top with him and looks to go for a Face First Suplex, but Kazarian blocks it and hits the FLUX CAPACITOR~!


Both men are slow to their feet, but both men eventually get up in their respective corners. Sabin charges at Kazarian but just STAYS EATING BOOT ALL NIGHT! Kazarian gets on Sabin’s shoulders and goes for a victory roll…but Sabin rolls through and gets the 100% CLEAN three count!!!


Winner: Chris Sabin


My Opinion: Great match up between the two, which was almost as good as their first encounter almost 3 months ago. Sabin getting the clean pin did shock me, but hey…this tournament is pretty bad ass tonight. Sabin vs. Juvi in the finals works for me…but damn, I would have loved to have seen Teddy Hart in that spot. I wonder if the Sabin/Kazarian feud is now over, but Sabin will definitely be able to say that he advanced in the tourney farther than his two main rivals, so a loss in the finals won’t matter…he’s still in the title hunt. ***3/4.


In the back, Terry Taylor is with AMW. They say that they’ll have to put the Tag Team Titles aside to concentrate in the Cage Match. After the interview, Kid Kash and Abyss walk up to them. Kash apologizes to Terry Taylor for slapping him last week and assures him that he’ll never do it again. He says that the “America’s Most Wannabe’s” were talking about respect earlier…and he found it on the bottom of his shoe. He then slaps Taylor again…which enrages the former Red Rooster, who is held back by Red Shirt Security.


Chris Sabin vs. Juventud Guerrera in the Finals of the Super X Division Tournament


Match Background: Chris Sabin JUST finished wrestling against Frankie Kazarian in the semi’s after defeating Jerry Lynn in the opening round. Juventud Guerrera opened against Nosawa, putting him away early before having one of the best matches I’ve seen all year with Teddy Hart. This is for “bragging rights” and the winner isn’t guaranteed a shot against anything…but I’m sure it’ll translate into something. Once again, I just hope it’s clean.


The Match: Clearly, Chris Sabin is at a disadvantage, having just wrestled against Frankie Kazarian less than 5 minutes earlier. He gets a few minutes rest as Jeremy Borash gives us Boxing Style Intro’s for this one. I like that…it gives it a “big match” feel.


At the bell, Sabin doesn’t want to lock up right away and uses the ropes to break away. I don’t blame him. A “Hail Juvi” chant starts as both men motion towards the crowd. Sabin fakes a handshake with a slap to the face and receives one in return. They shove each other…and it’s ON as both men run towards the ropes at the same time and hit the Indy Applause Stance! You know what…tonight, that’s forgivable. It’s the finals, no one else did it tonight…I understand.


Sabin then goes to shake Juvi’s hand, but he gets the finger instead. Sabin goes for a clothesline, but gets kicked instead. Sabin ducks a second kick, but eats a third. Juvi comes BLAZING off the ropes with a flying head scissors and puts Sabin in a tight armbar to slow it down. Juvi transitions it into a cross armbreaker, but Sabin escapes. Juvi chops away at Sabin’s chest and gets on his shoulders for a rana. Sabin tosses him off (and Juvi lands on his NECK instead of rolling and landing on his feet) before connecting with an enziguiri (to said neck). Sabin gets a two count off of it and whips Juvi into the corner…and EATS BOOT AGAIN! Juvi counters with a spinning wheel kick that sends Sabin to the outside. Juvi fakes going to the outside again and then hits a pescado! He rolls Sabin back in and hits a slingshot elbowdrop for two.


Juvi hooks on a hammerlocked abdominal stretch on Sabin before chopping him in the chest once again. Juvi jumps onto Sabin’s shoulders and tries to bulldog him down, but Sabin swings back with an OCEAN CYCLONE SUPLEX~! Sabin hooks on a Straight Jacket submission hold before going to the 2nd rope. Juvi picks him up and goes for a powerbomb, but Sabin goes for a sunset flip…only to eat a basement dropkick by Juvi! Juvi goes to pick up Sabin, but he rakes the eyes and regains the control.


Juvi gets up and whips Sabin into the ropes. Juvi charges and Sabin gets on his shoulders, only to be dropped back in a cross armed version of Frankie Kazarian’s Back to the Future for two! Juvi goes for a waistlock on Sabin, but it’s reversed…but Juvi has nothing to fear as he lands on his feet on the German Suplex attempt. Sabin kicks him in the midsection though…and goes for a powerbomb! Juvi lands on hit feet and goes for one of his own, but Sabin counters and whips him into the ropes where they end up in a BIG nearfall reverse sequence. In a cute spot, both men fall on their asses at the same time afterwards, dizzy from all of the spinning and reversing.


Both men slowly get up and the fans are definitely into it, clapping along. A slugfest erupts in the ring, but Sabin wins it. He ends up whipped to the ropes and on Juvi’s shoulders, but rolls off and they exchange a ton of reversals before Juvi turns a powerbomb attempt into a roll up for two! Juvi nails a bulldog and the fans erupt as both men are down again! Juvi gets up and springs off the apron with a front dropkick! He nips up and motions for the Juvi Driver! Sabin reverses and hits the Over Easy for two! (Flipping DDT out of a Razor’s Edge position.) Sabin goes for Future Shock, but Juvi floats over and hooks both arms.


Sabin blocks it at first…so Juvi stops to chop him and then proceeds to drop Sabin SQUARE ON HIS FUCKING HEAD WITH TIGER DRIVER~! ’91! HOLY SHIT! SABIN…IS…DEAD! ONE…TWO…NO!!! OH MY GOD!


Juvi picks him up and goes for the Juvi Driver…but Sabin reverses it into a swinging DDT! Both men are down and the fans are chanting “TNA” like they MEAN IT! Sabin goes for the cover and once again only gets a two count. Sabin goes to the top rope and comes off the top…only to eat a front dropkick to the FACE! Juvi goes to the top, but Sabin cuts him off! Sabin superplexes Juvi off and both men just collapse with both men covering each other! ONE…TWO…NO! Juvi gets up and gets a roll up for two…and then Sabin does the same! Sabin goes for a clothesline, but Juvi ducks and hits the JUVI DRIVER~! He goes to the top…and hits the 450 SPLASH~! ONE…TWO…TH..NO! SABIN GOT HIS FOOT ON THE ROPE!


Juvi picks up Sabin and goes for his Torture Rack sit out powerbomb, but Sabin lands on his feet and hits the FUTURE SHOCK~! for the ONE…TWO…THREE~!


Winner of the Super X Division Tournament: Chris Sabin


My Opinion: I can’t believe it…I JUST finished watching an amazing match with Juvi and Teddy Hart and here I am going CRAZY for a match that takes place just 20 minutes later with one of the same guys! I am LOVING this…what is this…WRESTLING!


Sabin going over was the right move here as he definitely benefits more from a win here than Juvi would. This tournament was fucking excellent as almost no one looked bad in it and besides the Lynn/Sabin match, every finish was as clean as possible. The X Division Title picture is now wide open again as Juvi has earned a shot should he ever want it, the same with Teddy Hart, Frankie Kazarian and especially Chris Sabin. This was probably the best booked tournament that I’ve seen in a LONG TIME. I hope and PRAY that they make this tournament an annual event.


This match really could have gone either way with both men getting unbelievable near falls and having excellent counters. Aside from what I felt was a slightly anti-climactic finish and the goofy dizzy spot, this show delivered yet again…a second MOTYC in my book. ****1/2.


Another Piper promo airs hyping his eventual return.


Tenay and West pimp next week’s .1 cent PPV. It’s a “Best Of” show…


Jeff Jarrett, Americas Most Wanted, D’Lo Brown & Raven vs. Christopher Daniels, Shane Douglas, Simon Diamond, Johnny Swinger and AJ Styles in a Wargames Style Cage Match


Match Background: Everyone hates each other. Fight now. That’s it.


Just kidding. I’ll break it down for you.


America’s Most Wanted have been feuding with Simon and Swinger for months over the NWA Tag Titles, which Simon and Swinger finally won last week. Jeff Jarrett has had issues with Chris Daniels and Styles’ camp. The same can be said about D’Lo Brown. Raven has been feuding with Shane Douglas and the Disciples of the New Church and last week, everything came to a head as Raven faced AJ Styles for the NWA World Title. After the match, all hell broke loose with a big ass brawl erupting, so Director of Authority Erik Watts came in and declared that there would be a 10 man tag team match tonight…Wargames Style. It’s not technically Wargames because TNA doesn’t have two rings and this match isn’t a submission only match…but there will be two men starting out and every 90 seconds, someone from the two teams will come into the match and the match cannot end until all 10 men are in. Weapons are legal and happen to be connected to the cage…Erik Watts is the special ref and Dusty Rhodes will be holding the key to the cage, baby.


For the record, there hasn’t been a real Wargames match in years. Wargames was probably the best gimmick match that WCW ever had and on September 19th, the MLW (Major League Wrestling) promotion are going to be holding their own REAL Wargames match in Fort Lauderdale, FL.


The Match: Jeremy Borash introduces Erik Watts, who comes into the ring with a referee’s shirt on. He gets on THE STICK~! and demands that the timekeeper, the ring announcer and ring attendant (the lovely Athena) leave the ring…as they’re to be replaced by the 3 Live Krew.


B.G. promotes the 3LK shirt as he gets on THE STICK~! and then ring announces as Chris Daniels comes down to the ring with Vince Russo. Russo is wearing the NWA Title around his waist…JUST to PISS…ME…OFF. Jeff Jarrett is then the next man in as he’s accompanied by Dusty Rhodes.


Daniels attacks Jarrett outside the cage before the bell rings and they end up brawling in the stands. They finally make their way into the cage, which is then closed and the bell rings. Jarrett delivers a spinebuster to Daniels in the ring before throwing him into the cage face first. Jarrett gets a trashcan from the cage….only to EAT it as it’s kicked back into his face with a Daniels leg lariat. Don Callis goes to the announce table to provide some commentary as Daniels uses a kendo stick on Jarrett. The fans show they’re true feelings for Jarrett as they chant “One More Time” at Daniels. Callis gets on the stick and loves me as he talks about the fact that he likes buyrates and this is sure to bring some in. He isn’t pleased with the fact that Watts was the one who made the match though. Daniels gets a pair of nunchucks and uses them on Jarrett.


Daniels jumps off of the top rope with the stick, but Jarrett gets a boot up and starts beating him with the stick. He then slingshots him into the cage…and he really should be bleeding by now. The clock winds down as Jarrett connects with another shot to the head. AJ Styles runs in only to taste the stick and then the cage thanks to Jarrett. Jarrett then tosses a trash can at him, but eventually, the numbers are too much as Daniels and AJ double team him. Styles continues to unleash hell on Jarrett as Daniels sets up a table. He doesn’t get to do much with it as Chris Harris is the next man in and spears the HELL out of AJ Styles! He then drives Daniels into the cage, allowing Jeff Jarrett to get the advantage as well. He places AJ on the table, but Daniels hits the STO on Harris. Russo gets on commentary and starts shouting at Tenay as Styles and Daniels put Jarrett through the table!


Simon Diamond is the next man in and he goes right after Jeff Jarrett, who’s busted open. Daniels starts choking him as Harris gets the hell beaten out of him as well. Jarrett grabs a bull rope and uses it on everyone to regain the advantage for his side! All of the babyfaces are bleeding as D’Lo Brown is the next man in! D’Lo goes after all of the heels, allowing Jeff Jarrett to rest. He grabs a trash can and hits everyone that moves! Harris scoops up Styles and hits a SUPER CATATONIC~!, spinning around a couple of times before driving him down. Jarrett nails AJ with a trash can as well as the clock winds down and The Franchise, Shane Douglas comes in.


Douglas comes in and goes after D’Lo. He’s nailed with a lid by Jarrett though and goes down. Harris is rammed into the cage as Daniels uses a lid on all of the faces. Russo tosses the baseball bat into the cage and Douglas uses it on Jarrett. He then wacks D’Lo in the gut with it as James Storm is the next man in the match. Storm gets a trash can and once again the faces have the advantage. Jarrett leaps off the top of the cage with a guitar on Daniels…and it barely cracks! Daniels just collapses in a heap as the babyfaces take over.


The clock winds down again and Johnny Swinger comes in and that’s the last man for the heel side. He comes running in and immediately, the heels are on top again. Douglas taunts D’Lo with a pair of trash can lids before nailing him with it. The clock winds down and the last man in, Raven, comes into the ring to a BIG pop with a cookie cutter in his hand. He’s limping for some reason, but he starts cleaning house with the lid though. He goes for the Raven Effect on Douglas, but gets kicked in the head by Daniels.


The heels have the advantage as they ram D’Lo into the cage. It’s hard to see all of the action, because the ring is full with 11 guys, Watts included. It looks like a lot of slow brawling…until Harris gets tossed into the cage. It happens to the rest of the faces as the heels are at a clear advantage. Douglas is wielding the bat with expertise as Daniels beats on Raven in the corner. A trio of heels try to ram the faces into the cage, but all three men are reversed and the tide turns.


All of the heels get rammed in as well as D’Lo goes ballistic on AJ in the corner! The faces corner mouth the heels in every corner with the exception of Raven and Douglas as Raven delivers the Raven Effect. Daniels nails Raven only to be caught in the Sky High by D’Lo! D’Lo is then caught in the Problem Solver as it’s FINISHER TIME~!


Chris Harris spears Simon Diamond and James Storm hits the EIGHT SECOND RIDE~! on Swinger. Styles hits his quebrada/reverse DDT combo on Storm, but once again, it’s sloppy this week, sadly. AJ sets him up on the corner as Styles gets on the top rope…only to get Stroked off the top by Jarrett! D’Lo Frogsplashes AJ as Harris legdrops him off the top at the SAME TIME…allowing Jeff Jarrett to get the pinfall!


Winners: Jeff Jarrett, AMW, D’Lo Brown & Raven


After the match, the brawl continues with Sonny Siaki, Legend, Russo & Trinity beating the hell out of Dusty Rhodes to get the key. The cage is opened and it all spills to the outside, with the exception of Douglas and Raven. Hell, even 3LK get involved and brawl with the heels at ringside. The Disciples of the New Church and Mitchell come into the ring and lock it…as they’re left alone with Raven. They cut snippets of his hair with scissors as the PPV goes off of the air.


My Opinion: Good match up, but it was very chaotic and out of control because of the number of men in the ring. It was hard to call the action, hard to see the action and even harder for action to take place as the ring was just crowded and didn’t allow much room to move. The brawl was very entertaining though and the Raven/New Church storyline was advanced. All in all, I’d say that it was about ***.


Overall: I don’t care what anyone else tell you. I am telling you to find a copy of this show. The Super X Division was a GREAT Tournament (blowing that piece of shit Hard 10 out of the fucking ocean) and the Wargames match was very fun. I would say that this is probably TNA’s BEST show…EVER.


…Ok…NOW I’m spent.


Please, don’t just sit there and say nothing to me. Give me some feedback! Tell me what you think, positive or negative over at [email protected] or [email protected].

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