Guest Ash Ketchum Report post Posted April 11, 2002 It sits there. Far corner of the room, near the door. All shiny and metal, a cromish shade of silver, even. On the outside, it is spotless. The contents within include chewed up pieces of gum, wads of tissues, toothpicks, and paper cups. Yes... it is a bucket, currently being used as a wastebasket. A simple bucket. But enough about the bucket for now. Disrupting the serenity of the room is a voice that calls out... calls out ot someone: "...Charizard, Flamethrower, 80 Damage, game." The shot cuts to Ash Ketchum, who is quite possibly the biggest Pokemon nut in the world. He smiles happily, face beaming wiht pride, as his opponent stands up and slams his Pokemon cards down on the table in disgust. "DAMN!" "Pay up, dude." Pulling a $20 out of his wallet, a disgruntled T-Bone slams it on the table and collects his cards back up itno a deck once more. "Just you wait," T-Bone yells, "I'll get you next time, Ash!" "Oh..." Ash calmly replies, "I don't think so. I am the Pokè Freak, as you may recall." T-Bone stares at him blankly. "You know... the Pokemonster? The Grandmaster Pokemon Trainer?" T-Bone shakes his head in confusion. "You've been away too long, my friend... now get going." T-Bone sighs, and reaching down with one arm, scoops his TV Title up onto his shoulders. Looking back at Ketchum once more, he turns around headed for the door. Grabbing the handle, T-Bone turns it... "SMACK!" The door flies back into his face as Erek Taylor, on the other side of the door, opens the door at the same time, slamming it slightly into poor T-Bone's head. The Boner (ewwwwww!!!) grabs his forehead and staggers out the door in response. Erek stands at the doorway, watching T-Bone stagger out, and as he steps inside and shuts the door, he begins to open his mouth to ask what happened, but Ash brings his hand up to stop Taylor. "Don't ask." Taylor makes his way to the table, which is covered by a large mat Ash uses for the Pokemon Trading Card Game and several empty cans of Pepsi Twist. Several more litter the ground, as does a 7-11 Slurpee Cup... the RVD one. Grabbing the chair, Taylor proceeds to sit down, face-to-face with Ash Ketchum. As he does, his elbow hits the table, knocking off a Pepsi Twist can that falls off the table and rolls past Erek's feet. He watches the can roll by to a stop behind him, then turns to face Ash. "Hey, dude. How's it hangin'?" "Good." Ash replies. "You ready to kick ass tonight?" "You bet." Taylor replies with a smile. He is silent for a minute, looking at the mess of the X Force Nine Locker Room. "Kinda messy, ain't it?" "Yeah..." Ash replies. "But that's OK." The two friends smile as another Pepsi Twist can rolls off the table and hits the ground, stopping as it bounces once. Ash's eyes peer over at the can, watching it's every movement, as do Erek's, but suddenly, Erek begins to laugh. Ash looks up at Erek, and he then also begins to laugh as well, if only for a few seconds. "Man... this place is just like the APA, Ash..." "I know, dude-" "THUD!" Something hits the door... HARD. "THUD!" There it is again! Footsteps can be heard taking off and running down the hall as Erek and Ash jump to their feet, Ash running to the door and opening it. Lying on the ground at his feet is a piece of paper, and Ash bends over and picks it up, Erek looking over his shoulder. "What's that?" Erek inquires. "Hmmm... round marks on the paper... large ones in fact... looks like someone tried to nail this to our door with a pipe, Erek... I dunno who it is... but they must be pretty damn stupid..." As Ketchum holds the paper, he reads the content of the paper... --- Dear Ash... Tonight... I will personally end your career and mutilate you body and mind... you won't know what hit you, ass. That's what you get for helping injure me in the first place. Tonight is the first night in a long string of suffering, Ketchum. You will never be the same again. And Ash... remember... I am not the Game... I am not that damn good... I am better... Have a nice day. Sincerely, Jacob Helmsley, Professional Psycho and Scary Guy --- "Whoa..." Erek replies, "Jake's f'ed up..." "Yeah..." Ash stops, having another idea pop into his brilliant mind. "Erek... get me the pencil on the table." "O-K..." Erek runs off to the table, getting Ash his pencil and bringing it back to Ketchum. Going to the door, Ash holds the paper up against it and goes to work, writing on it and erasing stuff from it. As he writes, Erek tries to look over Ash's shoulder, but Ketchum blocks the view. "Done." Ash finishes as he holds up the paper, reading his new piece of work: --- Dear Ash... Tonight... I will personally humiliate myself and hopelessly try to violate your body and mind... you won't know what hit your ass, but it'll probably be my hand as I attempt to hit on you. That's what you get for not being gay like me. Tonight is the first night in a long string of flirting, Ketchum. You will never be the same again after I try to kiss you and fail like I always do. And Ash... remember... I am really gay... I am not that damn smart... I am the ice cream man... Have a nice day. Hugs and Butterfly Kisses, Jacob Helmsley, Professional Homosexual Ice Cream Man --- Upon reading, Erek bursts into laughter, as does Ash upon reading his newly re-written note, and crumpling it up, and throwing it over his shoulder, it falls without a sound into the bucket. The shiny bucket. The bucket of shininess. The camera focused on that metal bucket as Ash and Erek walk away... and then there is only silence... and that damned bucket. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Renegade Report post Posted April 11, 2002 .....Digimon is better Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Edwin MacPhisto Report post Posted April 11, 2002 Promo centered around buckets. Life is good. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Ace309 Report post Posted April 11, 2002 w00t Hell of a promo Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest Report post Posted April 11, 2002 w00t times a mill-yon! THAT RULED IT! I don't care if I DID get my ass kicked in a Poke-Your-Mom game! Ash, I'm glad to have gotten my ass kicked by you. Thank you. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest chirs3 Report post Posted April 11, 2002 Dude! Ash! That was awesome! Jacob Helmsley, Professional Homosexual Ice Cream Man Pure gold. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest ErekT2k Report post Posted April 11, 2002 Hahahaha, LOL, that was great Ash. But I think it should have went like this instead. Dear Sashy... Tonight... I will personally end my career of giving blowjobs and using Swedish Penis Enlargers... you won't know what hit your ass because it's going to be so huge. That's what you get for helping revealing my virginity in the first place. Tonight is the first night in a long string of Macaroni and Cheese nights, Ketchum. You will never be the same again because I cook the best Macaroni and Cheese. And Ash... remember... I am the Game... I am that damn good... I am drunk... Pray for me. I still watch Barney. Love, Jacob Helmsley, Professional Hooker and SJL Virgin Mary Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
