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The Agnes Era Begins!

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Guest FrigidSoul
This was also Agnes' idea

 

russo.jpg

Then Agnes is God.

<editted to make Agnes look bad>

 

Also this is how people in the Agnes area are living

res2.jpg

 

While people in the Deranged Hermit Era live like this!

mansion.jpg

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Guest Bottled Black

**Calls press conference to announce his free agency**

 

I thank you all for coming, and I will be short. I am declaring myself a free agent and will be offering my services to the highest bidder. Again thanks for coming and let the bidding commence..

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Spoiler (Highlight to Read):

YOU ARE BEING WARNED OF THE SUCKINESS OF MY PATHETIC ATTEMPT AT HUMOR! PLEASE BE WARNED! THANK YOU

BREAKING NEWS: WILL CHOKO ANNOUNCE WHOM SHE SUPPORTS?

 

Time: 5:54 a.m. MST

 

Written by Vitiated Spirit of the TSM Free Press.

 

 

Just when you think you've heard or seen it all, the unexpected comes in the latest of the "New Era Race" that is hotly being contested by TSM's own Agnes, CWM, Deranged Hermit and many others (ie: not really anyone else of worth or the hacks who's ages have passed).

 

It was just recently announced by the ever so wonderful and loveable Choko, that she is working on a detailed contract for all spammatory purposes to get one of the three top canidates solidified as her Eraian. Because as we all know, everyone, especially Satan, loves Choko and with all that love behind her, it would be a big boost to anyone's campaign.

 

But of whom has she chosen you must ask?

 

Is it perhaps Agnes who's return has made everyone pause and reflect themselves at the astonishing presence he brings?

 

Is it perhaps CWM who's illustrious company consists of his Gnomish ways?

 

Or perhaps Deranged Hermit, who is simply trying to make sure to taint his competitors claims?

 

We recently caught up with her agent, Edward James, to gain some inside comments on who she is in talks with.

 

VS: Hello! Pleasure having you with us, Mr. James.

 

EJ: Please, call me Eddy J.

 

VS: Uh... Ok then Eddy J. Could you please tell us why Choko has decided to jump off of the fence and choose a side?

 

EJ: Ah, straight to the point, as always, eh VS? Well, to put it simply in her own words, "Choko wanty besty, so's Choko needy make sure that Choko getty besty stuffy for Choko."

 

VS: ...so in other words... She sold out?

 

EJ: Why heavens no! What would make you suggest something like that?

 

VS: You just said that she said "Choko getty besty stuffy for Choko". In essence that means, she sells out.

 

EJ: Ah, but you see, that means she just wants the best deal that will make sure that her decision wasn't done in due haste.

 

VS: Oh, so you mean, she's plundering everything that she can out of the person she sold out too, so that she can still live it in style?

 

EJ: No... I just mean, there are certain things that must be contracted about before she can just put her support behind such and such person.

 

VS: ...fine then, I'll move onto my next question. Rumors are flying about that since Zack Malibu is supporting Agnes, that Agnes offered a full month date schedule to Choko in return for her services. Wouldn't this piss off WJM whom is currently having a fling with Zack?

 

EJ: Yes, something like that was put down on the table, but it wasn't anything like you just said.

 

VS: AH-HA! So you admit that Choko is moving up from crush to blown out cravings of the Zack Attack~!

 

EJ: No. Just saying that she was made and offer from Agnes that included Zack in the deal. It's like how CWM and Deranged Hermit also offered deals in exchange for her services.

 

VS: OH? And what could be as great as Zack?

 

EJ: Well, firstly CWM recently had placed down an offer to Choko of an army of Gnomes and some minor other things like ammunition, an evil hideout.

 

VS: And just what would she do with an army of Gnomes? Or ammunition? Or for that matter, an evil hideout?

 

EJ: To my knowledge she was planning on using them for a hostile takeover of TSM.

 

VS: :huh: Your kidding...

 

EJ: I hope she was... Don't think it would work out. I can't picture her as an evil gal.

 

VS: Ahem, and what did Deranged Hermit offer?

 

EJ: Well, he offered Choko the position of Mistress.

 

VS: Eh? His MISTRESS??? She's whoring herself out to be the #2 person?

 

EJ: Heavens no, it's just a position within the Deranged Hermit Administration.

 

VS: Deranged Hermit Administration?

 

EJ: The DHA is kinda like Congress only self-appointed people get in and it's ruled by DH who can object to any changes made.

 

VS: So you mean, the DHA is like royalty, without the royal to it?

 

EJ: Yes.

 

VS: ...ok. Could you explain to use the position then?

 

EJ: The position of Mistress, once D.H. (not to be confused with DH) has taken control of the Era, will establish her as the utmost respected, clever, and beautiful Diva on the boards. And basically override any other Diva on the boards. Hence, if a Diva got out of line, Mistress Choko could use ... ahem ... persuasive measures.

 

VS: Such as...?

 

EJ: Apparently D.H. has a deal going that would allow Mistress to use Dames anyway she deems fit. The details at the moment are sketchy on how exactly that would come to be.

 

VS: aaf.gif D.H. wields such power against Dames?

 

EJ: Not that we know of currently, hence why the deal hasn't come to fruitition yet, but he must have something otherwise why put such a ludicrous deal in front of us?

 

VS: True, so true.

 

VS: Was there any other offers that were up for grabs that Choko could be considering?

 

EJ: Not currently no, but if something came up, she'd certainly be looking into it.

 

VS: Thank you for your time EJ. Think we might be able to get a hold of Choko for comment sometime?

 

EJ: I don't know, Choko's a busy gal, we'll have to get back to you on that.

 

© 2004

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nerd.jpg

 

Even this board's administrator, Stephen Popick, enjoys the Agnes era! I hear while having sex with his future wife, he once accidentally called her "Agnes"!

No, no, no, you got that all wrong. I alternated between shouts of Agnes, Supes, and Marney.

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**Calls press conference to announce his free agency**

 

I thank you all for coming, and I will be short. I am declaring myself a free agent and will be offering my services to the highest bidder. Again thanks for coming and let the bidding commence..

*offers two pennies, a button and piece of lint, plus all leftovers and one bitch*

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Someone tell me who Agnes is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your mom.

 

- Deranged Hermit, not your mom.

I'm gonna take it this is a big joke since nobody can actually come up with a reason why he is godly.

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Someone tell me who Agnes is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your mom.

 

- Deranged Hermit, not your mom.

I'm gonna take it this is a big joke since nobody can actually come up with a reason why he is godly.

No you wont.

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Someone tell me who Agnes is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your mom.

 

- Deranged Hermit, not your mom.

I'm gonna take it this is a big joke since nobody can actually come up with a reason why he is godly.

No you wont.

Well nobody can provide a reason why he's so godly so I'm guessing it's a sarcastic joke.

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Someone tell me who Agnes is!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Your mom.

 

- Deranged Hermit, not your mom.

I'm gonna take it this is a big joke since nobody can actually come up with a reason why he is godly.

No you wont.

Well nobody can provide a reason why he's so godly so I'm guessing it's a sarcastic joke.

There is no reason as to why he is so Godly. That's just the way it is.

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nerd.jpg

 

Even this board's administrator, Stephen Popick, enjoys the Agnes era! I hear while having sex with his future wife, he once accidentally called her "Agnes"!

No, no, no, you got that all wrong. I alternated between shouts of Agnes, Supes, and Marney.

 

-Agnes, for a Popick-free Smart Marks

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Guest AP Newswire
nerd.jpg

 

Even this board's administrator, Stephen Popick, enjoys the Agnes era! I hear while having sex with his future wife, he once accidentally called her "Agnes"!

No, no, no, you got that all wrong. I alternated between shouts of Agnes, Supes, and Marney.

 

-Agnes, for a Popick-free Smart Marks

Agnes, anyone ever involved with the AP pledges support to you.

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Benoit supports the Deranged Hermit era. Anyone who disagrees gets this:

 

benoit07.jpg

 

EDIT: Fucking GIS.

Edited by DerangedHermit

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...

 

You picked a picture of Benoit in the ankle lock.

Kurt Angle was giving Benoit an Ankle Lock because he wanted to join the Deranged Hermit era first!

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Wow, just wow.

 

Oh, and Im a fence sitter on this whole thing. Can't decide between CWM and Agnes.

 

Hermit, go home.

 

 

One more thing: WHY THE HELL DO I ALWAYS MISS THE GOOD THREADS?

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