For those who "don't laugh"

[Youth N Asia 0]

Examples:

In season 1 of The Sopranos, when Junior's girlfriend has been telling everyone that he gives her cunnilingus, he calls her something along the lines of "stinking blabbermouth cunt" - my mom was there so I had to stop myself from laughing, but DAMN.

And to top it off he puts a friggin pie in per face. CLASSIC!

 

I would always chuckle when someone would get called a "motherless fuck" on the show. Or when Ralpie would say whore...just cause it would sound like "who-are"

[Guest The Winter Of My Discontent]

I can listen to Cartman ask Mr. Garrison to suck his balls all day. The banter between the kids and the guidence counsellor is also pretty fucking funny. In short, I don't watch South Park, but their movie is pretty fucking genius.

[Toshiaki Koala 0]

Another thing that really makes me laugh (I guess I'm not one of those people who "don't laugh," but what the hell) is reading a negative review of a movie or book.

 

I laughed so hard I actually thought I wound die when I read this on Amazon.com:

 

If you like lengthy discussions of pedophilia and descriptions of sexual torture, then you'll probably enjoy "Wizard's First Rule". If, on the other hand, you believe that those topics are best excluded from fantasy writing, then you should probably avoid this book like the plague. It would be no exaggeration to say that "Wizard's First Rule" is, by a considerable margin, the worst book I've ever read. It trundles along without any hint of originality or inspiration, and the bizarre and unpleasant sexual content is added frequently in a failed attempt to break the monotony of the paint-by-numbers plot. At the end, all you can do is gape in awe at the author's total incompetence and wonder how anyone with an IQ higher than 30 could possibly find as much as a single redeeming quality in this mess.

 

We start with an evil overlord, who bears the idiotic name of Darken Rahl. (His father is named Panis Rahl. I kid you not.) Darken happens to need a magic object (in this case, it's a box) to fulfill his desire to take over the world. Starting to sound familiar? It gets worse. We meet a noble but somewhat reluctant hero named Richard Cypher. Richard is mentored by a wise, gray-haired wizard. He also falls in love with a beautiful woman named Kahlan. Unfortunately, an ancient form of magic prevents Kahlan from having sex with any man that she's in love with (D'oh!), but she does the next best thing, following Richard all over the place and offering up dialogue so corny that it would make George Lucas blush ("I can't go on anymore without telling you about me. About what I am. It's cleaving my heart, because I'm supposed to be your friend.") The three heroes march off, fighting various monsters and bad guys along the way, and eventually have their final showdown with Darken Rahl (spoiler: the good guys win). Amazingly, Goodkind takes this already thin storyline and stretches it to over eight-hundred pages, filling the space with tediously predictable events such as a scene where Richard must choose between saving his girlfriend or saving the world. For those who haven't studied the art of comic-book plot development, I'll ruin the suspense by saying that the author dodges the dilemma by having him save them both.

 

The characters are unbelievably thin. Darken Rahl has no personality or motivations whatsoever. Will fantasy authors ever realize that undeveloped villains are neither frightening nor interesting? Richard fares little better. Whenever he's not fighting, he spends most of the time wallowing in self pity and wishing he were home, yet these emotions never seem to get in the way of his heroic quest. The behavior and emotions of Kahlan and the Wizard Zedd are almost exactly the same, to the point where you wonder why Goodkind bothered to make three separate characters. The cast of supporting characters is even worse. For example, we have a spoiled, arrogant princess (hey, there's an original) who seems to exist only so that we can have the emotional satisfaction of seeing her get humiliated several times.

 

Whenever the plot slows down, which happens quite frequently, the author tries to keep us awake by providing some violent sexual content. Women are raped, many children get abused and/or murdered, and I'm not even going to mention the man who is forced to eat his own testicles. The high point, or perhaps I should say the low point, of this phenomenon comes towards the end, when Richard gets captured and tormented by a Mord-Sith, one of Darken Rahl's personal torturers. Consider this passage: "There was a stunning explosion of pain in his head. Denna's grip on his hair was all that kept him upright. It was as if she had compressed the pain of an entire death training session into that one touch. He couldn't move, breathe, or even cry out. He was beyond being in pain; the shock took everything from him, and in its place left an all-consuming agony of fire and ice." Now try to imagine this nonsense going on for close to one-hundred pages, and you may start to see the problem. It's interesting to compare the violent content in this book to that in "A Game of Thrones". While George R. R. Martin also included scenes of rape and torture, he always kept them short and never went into unnecessary graphic detail. Furthermore, his episodes always had a purpose, helping to build the characters involved or describe the societies that they live in. In contrast, Goodkind's uses of rape, torture, and pedophilia are pure exploitation. They contribute absolutely nothing to the novel as a whole, and could easily have been omitted without losing anything other than a sizeable chunk of the book's excessive bulk.

 

Believe me when I say that the problems listed above are only the tip of the iceberg. There is literally nothing in this disaster of a novel that is done right. Due to amazon's size constraints, I don't have time to describe the needlessly long and tedious descriptions, the unsubtle sexism and homophobia, the insults to vegetarians and the physically handicapped, the painfully bad fight sequences, the absurd plot contrivances, and the ending that's worthy of a third-rate Disney movie. Suffice to say, "Wizard's First Rule" is a painfully awful exercise in overused stereotypes, without as much as a single redeeming quality. A vengeful Mord-Sith couldn't make me pick up the sequel to this piece of excrement. Nonsense like this is one of the reasons why many people simply choose to avoid fantasy fiction entirely. Luckily, we have masters like Martin or Guy Gavriel Kay to defend the dignity of the genre, but they're going to have an uphill battle as long as talentless hacks like Goodkind continue to crank out garbage like "Wizard's First Rule".

[Youth N Asia 0]

I laughed my ass off at last nights South Park. It was a little late for the "You Got Served" refrences, but BUtters was just great.

 

And "Wayne Brady, bitch!" on Chappelle was funny too