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Guest crusen86

SJL Absolution Card, April 24th

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Guest crusen86

SJL Absolution Card, Wednesday April 24th

Arena: Where else would a PPV be? The Gund Arena.

Word Limits: NONE! Anything over 10k will result in a beating though.

The Jew Date, meet it or die: 3pm Wednesday, standard BT.

Markers: Edited in later.

Theme Music: Black Sabbath - War Pigs (Rejoice Xero.)

 

TV Title #1 Contendership Hardcore Mall Brawl - send to HVilleThugg

Vanguard vs. Frost vs. T-Bone vs. Kojack vs. Jack The Ripper vs. The Reaper vs. Cutthroat vs. Josh Stark

- A repeat of last years Save The Drama For Your Momma match. 8 men go into mall. They beat the living hell out of each other. Simple. Referees are everywhere. To win, you must find a ticket saying "MALL BRAWL WINNER" which is hidden in the mall, and show it to a referee. The ticket is hidden inside a balloon, which is floating around the mall. Remember, the characters and officials don't know this. No DQ, etc, etc. Have fun with this one.

 

TV Title Match - send to Edwin MacPhisto

"TNT" Taylor Nicholas Thompson © vs. Tod deKindes

- "TNT" and Tod have become somewhat allies of late. How do we solve this? Face them off against each other in a match for the TV title, that's how. Glorious.

 

Singles Match - send to TheBostonStrangler

Insane Luchador vs. Poisyn

- Erm... Two men, both fighting for respect. Win and they probably won't get it regardless, but at least they tried.

 

European Title No DQ Elimination Match - send to Thoth

"The Superior One" Tom Flesher © vs. Z vs. Ced Ordonez vs. "Deathwish" Danny Williams

- These four guys have had so much going on between them since they joined the league. Countless triple threats, contendership matches, and flurou green tights. It all comes to a head here, where they will beat the stuffing out of each other. Elimination rules - once you're pinned/submit, you head to the back and cry. Winner is the last man standing. Does Flesher really wanna win here? Hmmm... I don't think so. But what would I know, I'm just the boss.

 

Singles Match - send to TheBostonStrangler

Xero vs. ???

- Xero fights question mark man. Fun awaits. Competitors know who they are.

 

Cage Match - send to Edwin MacPhisto

Jacob Helmsley vs. Ash Ketchum

- Misty finally escaped Jacob on Crimson, and a frail Ash wants revenge. He will get his chance, in a vicious cage match. But for the not 100% Ash, overcoming HHH's realitive will not be easy - the cage is very unforgiving. To win, exit the cage.

 

MAIN EVENT - send to Suicide King

World Title 45 Minute Iron Man Match

Erek Taylor © vs. Stryke

- Weeks of tension, anger and hate comes to head right here in what will surely be a match for the ages. It will be both men's last match in the SJL, before they head to the greener pastures of the SWF this weekend at 13th Hour. But, before that happens, they must decide who gets to leave with the honour of being the World champion. The title will be vacated on Crimson next week, where a group of worthy, WRITING competitors will go for it. But who cares about next week, when you have two bitters rivals ready to duke it out in a 45 minute Iron Man match? The person with the most falls in the alloted time wins. Good luck gentlemen.

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Guest Insanityman

Kick ass card. Yeah, this owns. Good luck to all. I probably won't get that respect... R-E-S-P-E-C-T. *Gets slaps by various wrestlers*... fine, I'll just write.

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Guest midnight_burn

The show looks very cool, several matches that are sure to be excellent. I like the name as well. And WAR PIGS is the theme music! Rejoice!

 

And i guess i'm being bumped along with Erek, so my last JL match will be my first JL PPV (having joined just after Code Red). Then i get to move onto my second WF PPV at 13th Hour, which should be plenty of fun.

 

Well, it's my final chance to win the SJL World Title, so i'll certainly write my very best in order to win it (without jobbing this time). But against Erek it will no doubt be super hard.

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Guest

I ask you to put me in a single match. You do, but now you put me in another match where I need to write my ass of again!! Sigh...but then again it could be kind of fun to wirte I guess. Did those last senctances even make any sence?

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Guest DiabloIIFreak1010

Meh...

 

It's 9:20 where I am and I just woke up. I asked for a match against the question-mark man, but I didn't get it. Ask for a European Title shot, but I didn't get it. But it's meh. That's life. Better start writing...

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Guest Coffin Surfer

Quick Question.  Is my four way match tag rules, or everybody in the ring at once?

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Guest WrestlingDeacon

I have a question on the mall brawl match. Is the mall full of people and shoppers and such or it is totally empty for the match?

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Guest WrestlingDeacon

Another question: I don't see any stats for Josh Stark in the stats thread, is he that Genesis guy or has he yet to put them up. Thanks.

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Guest Ace309

Don't wanna win?

 

What do you MEAN I don't want to...

 

Edwin whispers in Flesher's ear, and then slaps him upside the head and mutters, "What an ass."

 

oh.

 

Never mind.

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Guest Edwin MacPhisto

Answers to things I know:

 

Danny: The four way match is everyone in the ring at once.  That's standard JL/WF procedure for 4-man elim matches.

 

Myers: Sorry.  Didn't fit.

 

and Frost: I don't know about the mall brawl.  Can't quite recall, y'all.  I guess Crusen will have the answer for that.  I assume it's empty, but that's just me.  I don't know yet what he intended.

 

Good luck to all!  Damn, no Spinaroonie of Fear...

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Guest Insane Clown Dan
The title will be vacated on Crimson next week, where a group of worthy, WRITING competitors will go for it.

 

I hope that wasn't aimed at me... or else i guess trust was lost in me :(

 

Wow... question marks are a pain.

 

*stabs ? with the almighty ? of death*

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Guest

I haven't started writing my match yet but I really hope that the mall is empty, cause I can have a lot of fun with that match if the mall is empty. I have quite a few things planed for my match I'll get a Super Soker 3000, steal some candy, stuff like that. Damit! I shouldn't have said that cause now everyone is gonig to do that kind of thing! Meah, oh well.

 

But any-who it should be fun writing this match cause it's a different stupulation and I have a fresh eye! Ohhh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy, oh boy!! This one is gonna be fun!

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Guest WrestlingDeacon

I actually have a few ideas involving a full mall I'd like to do, hopefully it will wind up being what ever we want. Although I assume that the stores will have to be open to do searching and things like elevators and escalators would have to be running.

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Guest Edwin MacPhisto

I guess you can probably write it however you want, really.  You're in a mall, that's the basics of it.  Have fun with it.  Malls are awesome, and by awesome, I mean totally sweet.

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Guest

Hi all.  The incredible debuting Josh Stark here.  Wrestling Deacon, my stats are not up yet, I am waiting for clearence from on high.  If I don't really need clearence, can someone tell me?  I will get stats up for you other seven writers as soon as I can.  Good luck.

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Guest

Alright, one thing that I really need to know is...who the heck is this Josh Stark? His stats aren't up on the Stats Thread, I've never heard of him before,and I've never seen him post once...

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Guest

OK, the stats for Josh Stark are now up.  I did it without getting the go-ahead, but I figured you guys needed them.

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Guest WrestlingDeacon

Josh, I had a similar situation when I started. As soon as you're cleared to join the league and put on a card you can put your stats up. Good luck to you, your in a heck of a match for your first time out.

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Guest crusen86

Yeah, sorry Josh. Once you get the "Welcome to the SJL!" message, it's all systems go to post your stats. I keep forgetting to say that.

 

As for the mall... Hmm... Full or empty... Do as you wish.

 

Oh, and Edwin will be posting the show. Send everything related in his direction.

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Guest Coffin Surfer

Speaking of the noobs, why the hell is everybody using Tiger Driver 91 now.  I don't mean to complain, but since I put it in my stats as a rare move(now finisher) there are like 4 people using it now.  Hell, Genesis is using one of the most credable finishers in history as a common move.  The reason I picked the move in the first place was because nobody in SJL was using it.

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Guest Ace309

Agreed. Damn. It's like people have no respect for minor moves, build, and anything that's not explosive and theoretically a credible way to murder someone.

 

Hey Kettle, you're black!

 

Shut up, brain. I'm picking on the noobs.

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Guest hhh6294

Cages...

 

Pipes...

 

STEEL!!!

 

 

...mmmm... ...steel...

 

 

Edit:  and with the Tiger Driver '91, it's all about the fad.  When Shane Helms was doing the Vertebreaker, hell, EVERYONE in the JL had the Vertebreaker as a fucking move!

 

NOW... of course... NOONE has it, 'cept me and maybe some dudes in the WF.

 

So... it's a fad.

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Guest

Well, I haven't said it yet so I will say it now. Good luck to every body because we all are really going to be needing it for SJL Absolution. Okay now back to the writing!

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Guest CED Ordonez

Since this is a PPV, so don't use an introduction like "As we return from the commercial break" since they're shouldn't be any commercials.

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Guest

HEY!

 

I used Tiger Driver '91 in ONE match, and it won me the belt, so THERE! Anyways, DAMN FINE CARD, if I may say so...

 

*Sean Connery SNL mode on*

 

But...somehow...this doesn't seem right...where's Alex Trebek's mom? Oh yeah, Victoria's Secret...heh heh heh.

 

*Alex Trebek comes from behind and knocks him out with a trash can*

 

CONNERY...FEEL...THE...trashcan.

 

*Sean Connery SNL mode off*

 

This obscenely profuse moment of violence has been brought to you by Mark McGwire and A-1 Steak Sauce! DON'T LEAVE HOME WITHOUT IT!

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Guest Coffin Surfer

Where are the markers? Its Tuesday night where I live, I have midterms all day tommorow.  I cannot stay up all night nor do I have time to get on the computer at all tommorow.  Crusen I am sending you my match. If your not gonna mark for it, send it to who ever the markers will be please.  Iam trying here.

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Guest HVilleThugg

Markers to be up momentarily.  For those of you who have already sent your matches to Crusen (or someone else), please try to send them to the correct markers by the due date tomorrow.  If you do not read this in time, I"m sure Crusen (or whoever you sent them to) will be sure to send them along, and you will not be penalized by your marker.

 

Also, a number of you have posted that you will be no showing...please send a PM to your marker about that.  A lot of us don't read every post on here, so don't rely on that.  So, send a PM if you're no showing.

 

Sorry for the inconvenience, and I hope that the markers will be a little bit understanding.  But also understand that these are 10000 word matches, so there's only so much extension we can give.

 

Da "feeling important" H

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Guest Edwin MacPhisto

All right guys.  I've heard from a couple markers that they haven't gotten many matches.

 

If you're no-showing and you haven't told anyone, you're in deep trouble.

 

If you need extensions, ask.  Those who screw this one up will find themselves in some rather compromising positions.  If Stubby can book an ice water G-string match, we the JLCC may just have to one-up him.

 

Markers, if you read this, let me know how you're doing with matches sent in so far.  I want to know when I should be here to try to get the show up and coordinate it all together.

 

Thank you, come again.

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