From Even Further Outside

[TNABaddboi 0]

From Even Further Outside

 

Wuzup everyone….I am the one and only TNABaddboi and I’m reviving one of my old favorite TSM columns, From the Outside, which was written by our favorite mod BPS every week before the PPV. I’m writing one just as a trial to see what you guys think of my revival. Feedback is always welcome. E-mail at [email protected]

 

Last Week in TNA

 

Coming off a hot Impact debut, TNA put the X Division in the spotlight again on PPV with a match between defending champion “Don’t Call Me Frankie” Kazarian and The Phenomenal AJ Styles. I have been digging Kazarian’s cocky heel antics as of late and who doesn’t love AJ, so I was definitely psyched going in and man did they deliver. It wasn’t a ***** classic, but it was a hot match that TNA gave the proper time. It was rare in that it was an X-Division match that built slowly, worked in some psychology and then hit the high spots. By the time they worked up to the finish, I was on the edge of my seat. I definitely dug the psychology of AJ appearing to regain the title the same way he won it the first time, with the Spiral Tap. Then it happened, ~BLOWN FINISH ’04. AJ completely missed Kazarian, Kazarian tried to kick out and do an alternate finish, the ref counted 3 anyway, and everyone kind of stood around confused. TNA used the finish to have an excuse for a rematch on Impact, which will be discussed later, but otherwise this was an unfortunate example of miscommunication ruining a fantastic match-up. I would have gone **** without the botch, but it was so ugly that it cost them ½* IMO.

 

In other developments, Jeff Jarrett is Jesus Christ and our lord and savior apparently, as they ran a loooooooooong “coronation” angle with Jarrett on the PPV. In all fairness, I got what they were trying to do and it did draw some good heat, but it just ran so long that by the time 3LK ran in, the crowd, who had been hot for The Truth, no longer cared….at all. The pop was non-existed. Speaking of 3LK, it appears that they are chumps, except for The Truth, who is only slightly less loser-ish, but still a chump for hanging around with his loser friends and needing a distraction to beat the champ in an anything goes match. At least that’s the message TNA gave fans on Wednesday. Don’t get me wrong….I like 3LK, but under no circumstances should they have to beg Russo to help them stack the deck against Jarrett when they already have the numbers advantage. It’s just so unrebel like. 3LK crew looked a little better on Impact, defeating David Young (who doesn’t) and the Naturals (who? Oh those Xplosion guys). Post-match, Dusty announced Jarrett defending against The Truth as the main event of the big anniversary show (which will be the first TNA show I ever attend….btw). That gives them two weeks to make me care. Have they done so yet? No. Well I kinda care, but only because I liked their first match in November 2002 and expect this one to be good too. That’s the smark in me. Average Joe in me has absolutely no reason to care whether Truth wins the belt or not. Here’s why:

 

1) Dastardly heel Jarrett beat 2/3 of his crew without any help. Bad sign for his chances.

2) Thus far, Truth only seems mildly concerned with the winning the belt. No biggie for him, no biggie for me.

3) Jarrett doesn’t seem worried about facing the Truth. It reminds me of HHH’s attitude when facing RVD, when instead we should get an imitation of his attitude before facing Benoit, you know, taking your challenger as an actual threat. Dusty made the announcement on Impact and Jarrett just kinda went “whatever”

4) Since 3LK are supposed to be rebels, wouldn’t it have made more sense for them to corner Jarrett into the match somehow instead of have it given to them by the authority figure they didn’t trust just a few weeks ago and by extension, should be rebelling against.

 

Also, Jarrett announced he was bringing “knights” (man they are taking this king thing too far. Does he think he is Jerry Lawler?) to face 3LK on the next PPV. This is a good development, as him feuding with 3LK by himself would simply not work because it’s impossible to feel sympathetic for a face with a 3 on 1 advantage on a heel, EVERY WEEK. I don’t know who the mystery guys will end being (I would have picked Kash and Dallas, but they’re now busy). Maybe the Naturals, but they just got jobbed on Impact and might be a bit of a letdown. I’ll reserve judgment until see it play out.

In summary, Truth being positioned as Jarrett’s first challenger: good. The angle supporting it thus far: bad.

 

TNA’s other money feuds for the time being are off to good starts. The best heel on the roster has leapt back into the X Division, interrupting Styles victory celebration with a Two Dudes With Attitudes Part Deux beat down. Pairing your best heel with your best face can only do wonders for crowd reactions, TNA. I applaud you. Kash kept the pressure on Styles with another 2-on-1 beat down on Impact after another hard fought victory over Kazarian, leading to a Styles/Dallas match on the PPV. Should be interesting.

 

This week’s PPV kicked off with Raven, upset because Sabu has interfered in his last few title matches because he was upset that Raven was selfish and abandoned him in his quest for the title, challenging Sabu to a his TNA specialty match, a Clockwork Orange House of Fun match. (Don’t ask…you just have to see it.) Throughout the show, Sabu was shown pacing, looking at a picture of his Uncle, the Original Sheik, who trained Raven and Sabu. Before his match, Sonjay Dutt consoled Sabu and told him he would talk to Raven (since Sabu doesn’t talk and all….I’m sure if you’re a new viewer, you knew that already though…OR NOT TNA!) Sonjay deliver the message that Raven knows about the promise so there’s not going to be match, and Raven rather violently delivered the message that promises are meant to be broken. Sabu rushed to Dutt’s aid as Raven left, and you know, he’s awful thoughtful and compassionate for a homicidal, suicidal, genocidal maniac. Dutt and Sabu relationship has yet to be explained, but seems interesting. On Impact, Tenay informed us that Raven and Sabu promised Sheik that they would never fight, and Sabu doesn’t want to make that promise. Hey look, it’s Bret/Owen, Undertaker/Kane all over again, only this time, the reason is even less believable. Next week, we will see what Raven has in store to goad Sabu into the match and whether Dutt wants revenge for that MAN-SIZED beat down he took. All in all, this feud is promising and got off to a hot start. Good job TNA!

 

Team Canada is still harassing the entire free world. Team Mexico is still being all sportsman like despite losing the World X Cup (which they OWNED before that), Team NWA finally won the big one, which one would think would have finally shut up D’Amore (obviously not humanely possible) and ended this feud (HAHAHAHA….never gonna happen. EVER.) Oh, and Team Japan and UK have had a freak accident and fallen off the face of the Earth. And some would say that’s a good thing. Team Canada ripped an NWA flag (how dare they?!!! The nerve!) to show us their dastardlyness and by the way, they defeated Jerry Lynn, Hector Garza and Heavy Metal on the PPV and then beat Team Mexico, minus Garza, on Impact.

 

Finally, David Young is a loser, D-Ray is stupid and the X guys (other than Styles, Kash, Kazarian and to a lesser extent, Dutt) just fly a lot. Pat Kenney is Irish, Desire recovered from a broken back and the NYC don’t like any of that very much. And Sonny Siaki is the latest person on Earth, because he always is a day late and a dollar short on saving his girlfriend Desire. That is all. If TNA’s not going to put any effort into character development, I’m not going to give any effort to writing about it. In all fairness, however, I have been moderately amused by Young and D-Ray (Hudson: The ring has 6 sides, but it’s in the same place. Hilarious!)

 

Oh…and if you are down, D’Lo Brown in coming soon. YEAH!

 

 

This Week on TNA

 

These are the matches listed in the official preview:

 

3LK v JJ/???

AJ/Dallas

AMW/Abyss & Monty Brown

Team NWA/Team Canada

Siaki & Kenney vs NYC

 

3 Live Kru versus Jeff Jarrett and his 2 minions (or versue JJ's 3 minions depending on which preview you read) will most likely get top billing and suck, but hey, you never know. It all depends on who the mystery partners are. And just how does the former Gorgeous George work into all of this? Last week, TNA gave us her name: Minsa, and more of her stalking Jarrett. And once again, they didn’t follow up on it on Impact (tsk, tsk TNA!). I’m sure they are drawing this out to make marks think Savage is coming to challenge Jarrett, but I wouldn’t hold my breath for that one. I doubt Savage’s over-inflated ego can let him appear on the “minor-league” TNA, especially without being guaranteed the belt. I think this Minsa thing ends one of two ways: either she is scouting Jarrett for a future opponent (Kanyon, DDP anyone?) or she offers to help Jarrett rid himself of 3LK once and for all and becomes his valet, kinda like that puppy chick a few years ago. Oh yeah, the #1 contender is in this match as well and I’ve yet to mention his name. And I’m not going to prove how much of an afterthought TNA has made him.

 

AJ Styles versus Dallas should be interesting. I know most of you are groaning, wishing it was Kash instead, but TNA knows you want to see that match, and they’re going to make you wait damnit! I am of the belief that this match could surprise you. As I said on the boards, Dallas can hit a big spot here and there and be carried otherwise, and no one, and I mean NO ONE, works the big man/little man match better than AJ Styles in 2004 (witness the awesome feud with Abyss). He pulls that match off better than anyone not named Shawn Michaels. And I have a sneaky suspicion that all this AJ getting outnumberedness leads to a triumphant D’Lo Brown return and a kick ass tag match on the way to a kick ass X Division title match. It makes sense on a bunch of levels, because AJ and D'Lo patched up their differences after their feud and D'Lo was feuding with Kash and Dallas before he left for Japan, so AJ would be calling on his "mentor" for help dealing with someone who has more experience than he does and the even out the numbers game. Cool with me.

 

It looks like for America’s Most Wanted title reign number 4, we are back to the random challenger generator. I guess I won’t complain, because the first time brought us Simon and Swinger, more on them later. AMW successfully defended the belts against the NYC is a “fan’s choice” match where the fan’s choice was totally ignored. Now they get the random teaming of Abyss and Monty. I’m sure it’ll be a power versus speed match and might be decent as long as Monty Green is on the apron. Might be. But if they are so low on heels teams that they are throwing together singles stars, maybe they should have held off on taking the belts off THE BEST HEEL IN THE COMPANY, and his partner Dallas. But I digress. AMW should win here and continue wondering aimless around until they put them together with the Naturals or with ~TEAM CANADA (c'mon TNA, you know you wanna do it! You definitely want to do it!). Abyss is under the control of Goldilocks, who hates Erik Watts because he dated her while he was MARRIED (some babyface, huh?). I’d look for them to get involved her too, because regrettably they are building to an Abyss/Watts match where if Abyss wins, Goldi gets Erik’s contract (and money) and if Watts wins he gets: something. Honestly, this whole scenario is too twisted and confusing for me to keep up with and I don’t remember. Just know that Watts gets something.

 

It’s ~INTERNATIONAL WARFARE as Team NWA (US) takes on Team Canada in a flag match. Team Canada have been become quite the effective little heel faction behind D’Amore’s mouth and penchant for interfering in matches at key moments. He got under NWA captain Jerry Lynn’s skin by claiming the US choked by losing the first X Cup to Mexico and that they’d be better served with another captain. Team NWA finally won the Big World Cup, which everyone thought would be the end of the feud, but alas, it continues. They still hate each other and Canada has defeated various combinations of the US and Mexico along the way. Oh, and D’Amore has annoyed Lynn so much that he is DETERMINED to give a cradle pile driver for his efforts (Good for him!). To settle the differences, a deadly flag match has been signed after Team Canada destroyed an NWA flag on the PPV and beat down Team Mexico on Impact. While I will admit this feud was well booked from February to May, I simply have no interest in it anymore. At all. And I like the guys involved. Imagine if I didn’t. I think Team Canada (particularly Williams and Rude) could help fill the heel void in the tag title division and that a feud between them and AMW would rule. And I’d really like Skipper to finish trying to reform XXX damnit! Sabin, I just wanted him to do something besides be an awesome worker and king of the Ultimate X. What that is, I don’t know….but it’s not my job to figure that out, now is it TNA?

 

Further proof that TNA cannot be accused of rushing angles is the feud between “Irish” Pat Kenney, Sonny Siaki and the New York Connection. In the immortal words of Mr. S. Keith, a word on Kenny, if I may: TNA had a marketable, semi-known guy in Simon Diamond, who can work the hell out of a microphone, and with time could have been groomed for the main event. And he was part of very effective heel tag team, which according to the aforementioned paragraphs are virtually non-exist in the company today? What do they do? First, the give Kenney Disco F'N Inferno, a heat vacuum, as a mouthpiece, then they split up the team, saddle him with the worst gimmick since Duke “The Dumpster” Drosese (he’s Irish. We get it. And so what?) and run a 3 month angle based on it. Virtually everyone here is miscast. Trinity is a heel but should be face, Kenney and Siaki are faces who should be heels, and Swinger and Gilberti mostly just suck. But the feud has continued. And continued. AND CONTINUED. The NYC found every possible way to humiliate Kenney with something relating to the Irish (Lucky Charms, Beer, yada, yada), because, ya know, he’s Irish. And somehow he paired up with Siaki, mostly because Trinity was jealous of the attention Desire got upon her return and Siaki needed help being too late to save her from vicious attacks. So anyway, here we are at the apparent blow-off, an ultimate humiliation match, where the winners get to humiliate the losers in whatever way they see fit. Hmmm….should suck royally. At least it will be over. Word is they want to push Kenney. Hopefully they do it for some other reason than he’s Irish. Who knows how Kenney and Siaki will humiliate the NYC. Maybe make Gilberti publicly suck Jarrett’s dick to keep his job like he does in the back each week? Just a thought.

 

Also appearing will be Raven, Sabu and some other people who at this point don’t really matter much in the TNA universe. I fully expect to see a Raven/Dutt match made for the anniversary show where Raven gets his match if he beats Dutt. Or at least that’s what I’d do. And I’d have Dutt beat Raven with help from Sabu on Impact before that so that he actually gets a rub from being involved in this mess.

 

RANDOM TNA NEWS:

 

Before I go, let me quickly discuss some news in the TNA world.

 

Now that Impact is on the air (by the way, it’s been a week and still no ratings!!! WTF?!!!!), TNA views Xplosion (it’s preview show that is basically a C show) as expendable, especially consider save a few decent clearance on regional networks, it airs on channels no one gets or know about at times no one would watch. They’re apparently going ahead with plans to cancelled it except the big networks (Sunshine, CSS, Empire Sports, etc). Can’t say that I care, because Xplosion is just kinda there to me. And I’ll still get it anyway.

 

TNA is internally hopeful that FSN will be so impressed with Impact that they will move the show to a pre-football timeslot of Sunday at 10 am. Gotta say that they would tremendously benefit from that, because people would actually be home, but I can’t say I see it happening.

 

TNA has signed some new talent that I’m not really familiar with (Colliyer, Strong and somebody else I can’t remember right now…sorry to any of his fans). Since my wrestling IQ is basically 14 years of WWE, 2 years of TNA and 3 years of ECW before that, I can’t say that I know them, but I am definitely willing to give them a chance.

 

The company is also planning to upgrade the production and look of the PPVs to match the sleekness of Impact and have permanently adopted the 6 sided ring (8 more Impact points, sez Tenay), or at least as permanently as possible in wrestling. Good move and good move, IMO. The hexagon ring helps differentiate TNA from WWE, which is a good thing and the PPVs should improve. The set is good, but the pyro and lasers and smoke machines and everything really help Impact and would help the PPVs.

 

 

That's it and that's all. Lemme know what you guys think. Agree, disagree? I don't care, just FEEDBACK ME!!!!

[USC Wuz Robbed! 0]

TNA has signed some new talent that I’m not really familiar with (Colliyer, Strong and somebody else I can’t remember right now…sorry to any of his fans). Since my wrestling IQ is basically 14 years of WWE, 2 years of TNA and 3 years of ECW before that, I can’t say that I know them, but I am definitely willing to give them a chance.

Roderick Strong and Alex Shelley are RoH regulars. They are good workers. You'll like them.

[Silence 0]

Roderick Strong and Alex Shelley are RoH regulars. They are good workers. You'll like them.

If they aren't X-Division style wrestlers, though, they're screwed. It seems as if technical wrestlers have a hard time trying to shine in the ring in TNA because of the X-Division style.

 

Think about Petey Williams and CM Punk, for example, and compare their TNA matches to their IWA-MS and ROH matches. You can't, because they aren't exactly X-Division style wrestlers.

[USC Wuz Robbed! 0]

True but if they pretty much can't go wrong with Alex Shelley. He is that good.

[Guest JacK]

Nice column. There needs to be more TNA columns around. Maybe they'll bring in these RoH guys as Jeffy Jeff's henchmen?

[Guest midnight_burn]

Unless something's changed the last couple of days i don't think Shelley and Strong have been signed as Collyer has, they're just being brought in for a dark match/tryout type thing. Both rule though and will no doubt impress.

[TNABaddboi 0]

Nice column. There needs to be more TNA columns around. Maybe they'll bring in these RoH guys as Jeffy Jeff's henchmen?

 

That's what I was thinking too. Thanks for the compliment on the column. I'd love to do it regularly. Anyone else got any feedback? ANYONE? BPS, I'd especially like to know what you thought.

[Guest The Ultimate Fantasy]

Very good recap, perhaps as good as From the Outside , although why does Sabu not talk? It would be very funny if the guy who talked for Sabu, would be Shark Boy.

[TNABaddboi 0]

Very good recap, perhaps as good as From the Outside , although why does Sabu not talk? It would be very funny if the guy who talked for Sabu, would be Shark Boy.

 

Thanks man. Um...TNA hasn't told us why Sabu doesn't talk. They have just assumed that you know because you watched ECW. If you didn't, I guess you're supposed to make up a reason. I believe the actual reason his character doesn't talk is because doesn't sound anything like someone from India. There is no reason in the TNA universe however.