1 AM Booking

[The Mandarin 0]

Dave Meltzer has several times in the past compared some of the WWE's booking to that of which "you do with your friends at 1 AM for a laugh". Well, I figured we should start our own 1 am booking club.

 

Rules:

1) Must be past 12:30 AM in your area when your idea is conceived. No entries posted after 5:00 AM.

2) Ideas must be more than 3 sentences each in length/description.

3) These ideas by NO MEANS have to be logical.

 

My entry:

 

Kane: Big Red..Gentleman?

Starring:

Kane

Lita

Have Lita come up to Kane and tell him what an asshole he's been. Have her tell him that she's ashamed to think that he could be the father of their baby when he's no good role-model for their child. Kane ignores this at first, but Lita starts crying and pleading with him. Lita says Kane needs to take a look in the mirror and try to find some compassion, just for once. Lita then kisses him on the cheek, much to his shock.

 

Kane goes to his "locker room"-- the far, secluded part of the boiler room. He finally turns on the light for once. He looks into a broken mirror over in the corner and touches his face with his hands. He continues to look at himself for a long time. A single tear rolls down his cheek.

 

Later, Kane goes into Lita and Matt's locker room, looking for her. She's not around, but he notices the TV is on. It's a made for TV movie and some boy is watching his dog struggle, caught up in the river current. Kane watches with his mouth open. As the dog paddles more and more, Kane softly roots the dog on. Eventually, the dog can't make it to land and drowns. The boy cries out for him, but his calls are never returned. Kane starts to sniffle. He eventually wipes a tear from his eye and struggles to regain his composure. Then, the voiceover hits: "And I never saw my dog again." Kane starts crying like a baby. Cut to commercial.

 

Next week, have Kane cut a promo about how he's a changed man. Over the course of the next few months, have him in segments where he tries to show Lita how he could be a good father. The three (counting Matt) go to parenting classes, where they take turns engaging in activities with Lita. Also, have segments where Kane helps Mae Young and Moolah across the road, does yoga backstage and where he randomly gives people baked goods. Unfortunately, these "baked" goods were usually set on fire by Kane during preparation. Kane is also in active competition at this point (holding open the ropes for his opponents during entrances), but he cries after winning every match with a devestating chokeslam and often carries his opponents' bodies to the back for medical attention.

 

Eventually, Kane, Matt and Lita all end up on the Highlight Reel for Chris Jericho to reveal who the baby's father is. It's eventually revealed..that it is Matt, not Kane. Kane is devestated. He looks calm at first and even shakes Matt's hand..but he turns around and clubs Matt in the side of the head, and we're back at stage one.

[Beast 0]

Then, the voiceover hits: "And I never saw my dog again." Kane starts crying like a baby.

 

If this ever really happened, I would proclaim it the best angle ever.