PWG "Kee_ The _ee Out Of Our _ool" DVD Review

[Guest SoCalTF]

PWG: Kee_ The _ee Out Of Our _ool

 

PWG offers their latest DVD releases in Kee_ The _ee Out Of Our _ool and The Musical which features some great wrestling, Super Dragon, great comedy commentary, and no music! In my first review of the two Criticly Acclaimed shows(by that, I meen all the fans on the internet message boards) I'll be reviewing the March 27th PWG event that features such matches as Spanky vs. Frankie Kazarian, Adam Pearce defending his PWG World Title against the cookie eating, Paulina Rubio loving Bobby Quance and the infamous Guerrilla Warfare match between everyone's favorite asshole, Super Dragon against the white washed black guy Scorpio Sky.

 

As we start things off, we see the trio of Valentina, "Classic" Colt Cabana, and the champion himself, "Scrap Iron" Adam Pearce all in the ring, dressed as gangsters with Babi Slymm's "Bling Bling" and we get a wonderful three and a half minutes of hearing the most well pronounced form of ebonics ever to come out of a white man's mouth and Colt Cabana walking around with his pants falling down telling Valentina to "Cook me an omlet bitch". Egg white yo, gotta keep the protein real! Very hilarious segment worth seeing and sets the mood for things to come on this DVD.

 

Disco Machine vs. Charles Murcury

 

We see the King of Studio 54 in Tempe, Armenia, Disco Machine taking Charles Mervury. Now for those who don't follow PWG storylines, 1st, what the fuck is wrong with you? 2nd, Charles is a part of a group that claims to have been held down by the owners of PWG which. Last time we got to see a huge 10 man tag match with all 10 men who have their differences face off in a very underrated match which pretty much set up the matches on this show. The begining of this match pretty much is all Charles Mercury trying to gain momentum but the crowd keeps getting behind Disco Machine. No matter how hard Charles tried to get the upper hand he keeps getting belittled by the crowd through out the match. Disco Machine basibly schools Charles in this "Teacher vs. Student" match so to say. On the audio track Disco Machine and Excalibur talk about Disco's "Stu Hart esque" dojo of dancing in his basement where Disco's 2 year old son and his cat are already accomplished dancers. Disco keeps trying to slow down the youngster but Charles Mercury tries to counter it but again see no sucsess. Charles Murcury works over Disco Machine on the mat. Charles finally gains momentum in the middle of the match but is not able to but Disco away as the crowd keeps trying to get Disco back into the match but Charles just stays on top of him until he mocks Disco by doing Disco's signature hip shaking but makes a huge rookie mistake as Disco gets back up and kicks him in the back of the head. Disco and Charles are neck and neck until Charles gains the upper hand again. He goes for a high risk move which backfires as Disco crotchs him on the top rope and Disco hitting a top rope belly to belly which only gets a two count. Charles gets back up and Disco hits a Chokeslam into a backbreaker for the win.

 

Ricky Reyes vs. Puma

 

Now we have two products of the L.A. Inoki Dojo as Ricky Reyes, One half of the Havana Pitbulls takes on the masked man, who's outfit resembles one of a bug so to say, Puma. Both men start out trying to land some kicks but they keep dodging it until Reyes gets the upper hand causing Puma to fall. Both men try to "jock for position" as Excalibur makes a joke about Willie Shoemaker on the audio commentary track. Puma gains momentum as he lands a spinning kick and gains an arm lock while Reyes reverses it into an ankle lock but Puma counters into another ankle lock but Reyes gets him into a knee bar submission. Reyes starts to get the upper hand while Puma keeps trying to make a come back but Reyes keeps gaining the upper hand on Puma. Puma tries to use his high risk offense to get the upper hand which works until he goes for a full nelson type hold which Reyes counters and gets him into a Boston Crab of sort. Reyes at this point goes for the mask of Puma which gets the fans on his back. On his third attempt, Reyes finally gets the mask off Puma to reviel the young, TJ PERKINS aka PINOI BOY! Excalibur mentions that he's been getting about 3 paychecks on PWG and Disco says their book keeper says PWG will be getting audited this year because of this. Now without his mask Puma goes some high risk offense by doing an AJ Styles type DDT off the ring apron and a hurincurana through the middle and bottom rope to the outside. Puma, or Pinoi Boy or whoever he is using his high risk offense to get the better of Reyes. He keeps trying to finish him off but Reyes wont go down. Puma, TJ, whatever goes for the Tombstone Piledriver but Reyes keeps reversing it to the point Puma goes to the apron and hits a 720 Tornado DDT, shades of Jody Fliesch but is still not able to put away Reyes. Puma has the upper hand till Reyes hits a neckbreaker and a fisherman's buster but Puma, Pinoi Boy, Tj whatever the fuck his name is keeps kicking out. Reyes hits another Fisherman's buster and another but still isn't able to but away his opponent who is using the power of three men to kick out of the pinfall. Puma hits a german suplex, gets back up, but Reyes grabs onto the ropes but Puma pulls him off and hits a Tiger suplex and gets the pinfall.

 

American Dragon and Samoa Joe vs. The Ballard Brothers

 

Joe has a history with the Ballards seeing as he knocked out Shannon Ballard at PWG's Tango And Cash. They faced off at Taste The Radness and Shannon gained the victory by getting a DQ by pretending that Joe knocked him out with a chair while the referee wasn't looking. And now we have Joe teaming up with American Dragon to take on these two brothers. Samoa Joe wanted in the match first but American Dragon convinced him that he should go first. Dragon and Shannon Ballard lock up to start off and Dragon works over Shannon's left knee and his lower back until Shane comes in to make the save for his brother. Both men are at even strength up until American Dragon hits a monkey flip from the Grecko Romen lock up onto a submission move that works over the shoulder (Don't ask me what the name is because I have no clue) and now we see the beloved Fish Out Of Water nearfall sequence but Shannon Ballard hits a head scissors sending Dragon down. Dragon tags in Joe and Shannon tags in his brother Shane because it's quiet obvious that Shannon wants no part of the 270 punds hulla dancing Samoan mad man. Shane just gets into Joe's face slapping him but Joe doesn't take his shit and slaps him back and goes to work on him but Shane gains the upper hand with a cross body block,a couple arm drags, and a dropkick but Joe gets up and elbows him in the face. Shane finally tags in Shannon but quickly tags out to Shane again who walks into a chop by Joe. At this point when Joe tags in Dragon, Excalibur talks about if Al Quieda took Joe's chops, they could of done more damage on 9/11 and Excalibur recalls his 9/11 memory as Disco calls him and wakes him up and as he turns on the news while Disco says the world is ending Excalibur recalled saying "Holy Fucking Shit" as Shane Ballard's world is coming to an end as Joe works over the left arm. Shane backs up American Dragon into the corner and tags in his brother who now has the upper hand on Dragon. At this point my mai