Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (edited) OAOAST HeldDOWN~! “I Like” plays and we see the opening video. Then we’re taken to the LOGO Massive orange fireworks light up the arena in a pyro blaze! The camera travels around the venue at a dizzying pace, not even giving us a chance to read some of the more creatively designed signs. We’re taken to Sofa Central where Coach and Mikey Cole are ready for another night of mixing up tag team partner’s names and miscalling moves! COACH C cubed has been minuesed one exponential power! It is now C squared. M.C and J.C, coming to ya live from Ann Arbor, Mich! HOLLA~! Tell em what we got planned tonight, home boi! COLE It’s so much more peaceful without Caboose insulting us, isn’t it. Anyway tonight’s show features the debut of Rick Shirley! Sadly my restraining order against him has yet to go through. Also Crystal will go up against her buddy Sly Sommers and we’ll have fallout from last week’s tag team fiasco. Plus this is our last show before our August pay per view extravaganza, AngleSlam! Expect things to be hot! COACH But now we kick it off with tag team action! BUFFER The following contest on HeldDOWN is for the HIYAH tag team championship, sanctioned by HIYAH & the OAOAST. It is set for one fall, with a 15 minute time-limit, under HIYAH rules. Introducing first, the challengers... Black smoke fills the screen as "Quiet" cues up. Jivin' J.R. runs out on the stage, lifting up his shirt, sucking his stomach in-and-out like its a tidal wave. Dan Black & T-Bod appear, a look of determination on their faces, just 3 days away from AngleSlam III, where they hope to regain the tag team championship. But tonight they're after the HIYAH tag titles. The rules used in HIYAH are slightly different than the ones in the OAOAST. HIYAH RULES 1. Throwing opponent over-the-top rope is an automatic DQ 2. Ramming your opponent's head into the guardrails or ringpost is an automatic DQ BUFFER (CONT'D) Followed to the ring by the Farmer of Champions, Jivin' J.R., hailing from London, England, "The Ice Heart" Dan Black! His partner, from Hollywood U.S.A., he's simply ravishing...T-Bod! Ladies and gentlemen, the former OAOAST tag team champions, Black T~! Black asks referee Sir Miles Manchester to open the ropes for him & T-Bod. Then in an herculean effort, Black T use all their strength to hold down the bottom rope so Jivin' J.R. can enter the ring. BUFFER Their opponents, from the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave, the HIYAH tag team champions, the All American Boys! The patriotic "Stars & Stripes Forever" hits. The mask men from the Land of the Free and the Home of the Brave head to the ring proudly waving Old Glory (American flag) with the HIYAH tag titles wrapped around their waists. The All American Boy II & III shake the hands of their fans, gathering up all the support they can. Surprising the AABs are met with a mixed reaction... COLE I'd like to take this time to tell the fans at home, that coming up later tonight we'll hear from the new OAOAST tag team champions the New New Midnight Express who stunned the Global Party XChange by defeating them for the titles last week on HeldDown. Oh my God! ...HELL'S HITMEN! Those boos weren't for the AABs but rather the #1 contenders for the OAOAST tag team titles, wearing busted STRAITJACKETS, their faces stained with DRIED BLOOD. COACH M-M-Michael...the--the straightjackets. You know what that means, don'tcha? COLE A mental hospital in the Great White North is missing two patients. They haven't even washed the blood off their faces. The All American Boys see Hell's Hitmen coming right at them. Black T quickly exit the ring, jumping over the guardrails. AAB II & III punch the two psycho's from hell -- nothing. Those guys love pain. JINGUS & The Sadist beg for more punches. These two nutjobs take everything the AABs have to offer until they drop the AABs with one punch. The Sadist gorilla presses AAB II over his head and THROWS HIM INTO THE RINGPOST like a human dart. COACH And his name isn't even Rey Mysterio. JINGUS gives AAB III a CLAW SLAM on the steel rampway, then throws AAB III over the top rope into the ring. JINGUS positions AAB III for the powerbomb, as The Sadist climbs to the top. VAYA CON DIOS powerbomb-clothesline combo. JINGUS covers AAB III. Sadist with the count. 1...2...3! COLE That doesn't count. COACH Go tell that to them. COLE Hell no! Jingus & The Sadist destroyed--I mean destroyed--the All American Boys. The Sadist takes a picture of Jim Cornette & the New New Midnight Express out of his white sweats, handing it over to JINGUS who RIPS THE HEADS OFF THE PICTURE. Whether it's because they're warming up to Hell's Hitmen, because they hate the NNMX, or even a bit of both, the crowd pops huge when JINGUS rips the heads off. James E. signed the death warrants of himself & the NNMX when he screwed over Hell's Hitmen. The two big men exit through the crowd, to the hilarious sight of fans running out of their way as Hell's Hitmen near their sections. Black T stand on the guardrails, making sure Hell's Hitmen have left ringside. Once they feel safe they hop over the rails and toss the AABs into the ring. Dan asks Sir Miles to ring the bell. * DING DING DING * COLE Sir Miles calls for the bell, I can't believe he's going to allow this match to go forward after what just happened. COACH The bell never rang. COLE Yeah, but do you really think the All American Boys stand a chance now? T-Bod scoopes up All American Boy II...and FALLS BACKWARDS. 1... 2... In an over-the-top matter T-Bod kicks out. T-Bod gets on his knees and pretends to breath heavy. He looks at Dan, extending his hand. "Worried" Dan stands on the bottom rope, reaching over trying to make the tag despite both members of the All American Boys being down and out. T-Bod crawls towards his corner, making sure the AABs don't stop him even though he can easily make the tag. T-Bod makes a dramatic dive to his corner, tagging in his partner. COACH Did that answer your question? They nearly defeated the former OAOAST tag team champions. But they still have no chance. Black enters the ring, huffing and puffing like Hulk Hogan after Hulking Up, but there's nobody to hit. T-Bod picks up AAB II moving his arm to make it look like he's putting up a fight. Dan ducks a right and nails him with a BLACKOUT (Stunner). T-Bod wraps AAB III's arm around his neck and runs at Dan. Black moves out of the way and clotheslines AAB III. No, he didn't! AAB III moved out of the way...I mean T-Bod moved him out of the way. They're toying with Uncle Sam's favorite tag team. But after tonight he won't want them. T-Bod spins AAB III around and lifts him up for the OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE (Spinebuster), Dan off the rope catches AAB III with the BLACK BOMB as T-Bod slams AAB III to the canvas. 3-B, BLACK BODYBAG! 1... 2... 3! * DING DING DING * COLE That's sickening. Black T just abused them. COACH I don't know, Mikey. It looked like the All American Boys were gonna pull off the upset. Besides, I'm sure HIYAH is thrilled to have Black T as their champions. You saw what those boys did to our tag division. COLE (sighs) The good news is Black T will be taking more trips to Japan, so if you don't see them on OAOAST TV, they're probably in the land of the rising sun. COACH Bill Watts must be pretty excited, because he'd love to sign a HIYAH tag champion vs. OAOAST tag champion match. Currently those champions are set to meet at AngleSlam--Black T vs. the NNMX--for the OAOAST tag titles. BUFFER The winners of the match, and new HIYAH tag team champions...Black T~! Jivin' J.R. grabs the belts away from the timekeeper and enters the ring, rolling around on the floor with the titles, before handling them over to their new owners, Black T, as we go to break. THE OAOAST PRESENTS... ANGLESLAM THIS SUNDAY, LIVE FROM LONDON, ENGLAND, ONLY ON PAY-PER-VIEW CALL YOUR LOCAL CABLE OR SATELLITE OPERATOR TO ORDER! (Return from break) COLE I understand that right now we are going to go to Bill Watts for a special announcement. (We cut to a scene of Bill Watts sitting in a chair.) WATTS Ladies and Gentlemen this Sunday at AngleSlam Rick Edwards will face off against J. Arthur Edwards to defend his X Division Title in a match that should be very emotional. However, there will be a special stipulation added to this match at the request of Rick. Rick came to me earlier this week and after a long discussion with the Board of Directors we came to an agreement. *The fans buzz in anticipation* WATTS This Sunday when Rick and J. Arthur face off all parties not involved in the match will be banned from ringside once the match starts, except for one man. That man will be suspended above the ring in a small cage until the conclusion of the match. That man will be Robert “Father” Edwards. *The crowd pops* COLE Whoa!! WATTS The reason that Robert will be there is because if Rick Edwards should win he will then have 5 minutes in the ring with Father with no rules and no ref. *The crowd pops even louder* COLE Oh my God!! WATTS Normally I would not grant such a one sided stipulation, but even I am appalled at the actions of “The Machine”. *said with the quotation finger gesture* Rick assured me that if he should lose he would never again pursue any members of “The Machine” again as a trade off for this stipulation. I thank you for your time and enjoy the rest of the show. *We cut backstage to the locker room of The Machine where all three men look pissed.* J. ARTHUR He can’t do that! You’re not an OAOAST wrestler Robert! ROBERT What are you worried about? Just defeat the man and we’ll never have to worry about him again. He’ll probably be so embarrassed that he’ll leave anyway. Besides I think this can work to our advantage. J. ARTHUR How do you figure that? ROBERT Trust me…I’ll figure out something. Now go and deliver your message before he leaves. *JAE gets up and leaves the room as we cut back to ringside.* COLE I can’t believe this news! If Rick wins he gets 5 minutes with Father, but what message does JAE have to deliver and to whom? Rick said he would never fight the Machine again if he should lose! COACH Yeah we all know that is a lie! Lies I say! Lies! COLE Simmer down, Coach. I’m not going to argue with you about this. Fans, Josh Matthews is standing backstage with the special guest ref in the Almost Famous match this Sunday at AngleSlam, Candie! Josh...... (Go backstage) (We go backstage where Josh Matthews and Candie are standing in front of a brick wall that has a white banner that reads “OAOAST AcKshUn z0ne in front of it.” JOSH What’s poppin, peeps? J.Math on the spot with Candie! Candie what’s up? Can we trust you to call the “Almost Famous” match right down the middle or what? CANDIE Joshua, Auntie Candie has always acted in a fair and impartial manner to all people. Have I ever done anything to lead you to believe that I would ever in my life do something that could cause harm and humiliation to my dear sweet niece Alix and her adorable little companion Krista? JOSH Hmm...Well...now that I think ab...... (Candie shoves Josh against the wall!) CANDIE That was a rhetorical question! I’m sweet, I’m kind, and I’m fair! EVERYBODY KNOWS THAT!!!!!!! If you try to argue with me, I’ll knock your block off! (Candie storms off) JOSH How can you argue with such infallible logic? Back to you. (Back to DA SC~~~~!~~!~!~!~!!!#$%&*^*^%^%&^^$$%$%#%$#) COACH Home skillets, while we’re on the subject of the Almost Famous match you can catch Krista Isadora Duncan on the Ellen Degeneres show tomorrow, Friday August 27th. She’ll talk about her time in the OAOAST as well as her new exercise video Gettin fit with KID. COLE Plus Ben Affleck’ll be on the show and he is way hot! COACH He's no Matt Damon, I'll tell ya that! But let's move on with the show! I understand that we've got a hold of some hot footage from Bill Watts' office. I never thought I'd say hot and Bill Watts in the same sentence. Let's go to it! Edited August 27, 2004 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 The words "EARLIER TODAY" appear in the upper left hand corner of the screen as we cut to a board meeting at the OAOAST offices. The camera manuevers its way around the long meeting table, giving viewers an up-close look at the stone-faced board of directors. The camera falls upon each individual seated around the table, moving through them one-by-one before stopping on a familiar figure. With "Uncle" Kevin Yancy Taylor at his side, clad in an off-white suit with a white shirt and solid black tie, with his dark brown hair slicked back, and--as always--wearing his trademark shades, is none other than Chris Bryte; the live crowd inside the arena boos when his image appears on screen. The camera then continues on, focusing on three more board members before focus shifts to the opposite side of the table, where another familiar figure sits. Wearing a white t-shirt with his "Panther's Way" logo printed on the front, a small gold chain around his neck, and a black 76ers cap pulled low over his eyes sits none other than the Champion of Champions himself, Panther; the live crowd gives a loud pop, and begins to chant his name when he appears. He's got a scowl on his face, and as the camera pans out, we can see that he's shooting an icy glare across the table at Chris Bryte. In the background, "Cowboy" Bill Watts eyes both men as he paces back and forth, with a look of ANGER~! building in his face with each turn. After a long, tense silence, Watts turns towards the table and bangs down on it with his right fist. WATTS I'M SICK OF IT!!!!! SICK OF IT ALL!!!!!!!!! Watts shoves some papers off the table, then begins to pace the room again. WATTS Do you two realize what grief that you've caused us?! Huh?! Watts walks over to where Bryte is seated and gets right up in his face, unnerving him a bit. WATTS Do you realize all of the bad publicity that you've caused?! Bryte looks down at the floor to avoid the Chairman's intimidating glare. Watts then heads over to the opposite side of the table, coming face-to-face with Panther. WATTS Do you realize all of the money that you've cost us?! The sponsers we've lost because of you two? Huh?! Watts bangs on the table again and gets right up into Panther's face. Panther seems almost amused by the Chairman's display, giving a light chuckle under his breath while sending a nonchalant look back at him. The angry Watts heads back to the front of the room, where he continues. WATTS This...this thing between the two of you has gone on long enough! Damn it, it seems like every week it's something different with the both of you. We've got people getting sent to the hospital! People getting arrested! People dying! THIS THING HAS GONE TOO FAR, AND IT MUST STOP NOW! NOW, I SAY! As he speaks, Bryte's making obscene gestures at Panther from across the table. Suddenly, Watts storms over to where Bryte's seated and bangs on the table again, nearly giving he and Taylor simultaneous heart attacks. WATTS You listen to me, you little shit, because you're the cause of the majority of this!!!!! You're the main problem here, Bryte, and last week was the last straw! You beating up a woman on live TV! Attacking POLICE OFFICERS! Damn it Bryte, I'm sick and tired of you! Sick of your shenanigans! You're damn lucky that I don't fire your sorry ass...you and that sorry uncle of yours. But no...I've got something better planned for you, Bryte--something that's gonna put this issue between the two of you to bed once and for all! Watts heads back up to the front of the room, making sure that everyone's focus is on him before continuing. WATTS Now Bryte, not too long ago, you and that uncle of yours had a restraining order placed on Panther, which prevented him from coming within 50 feet of you. Now unfortunately, that restraining order prevented us from signing another match between you and Panther; however, Wednesday afternoon, I got a memo from the police department in your hometown, Bryte, which informed me that due to your actions last week and all of the legal consequences surrounding your attack on those police officers, the restraining order has been thrown out! That means that we're free to book a match between you and Panther anytime we want, and right now, I'm booking that match for this Sunday night at Angleslam. Shocked by the announcement, Bryte leaps from his seat with his mouth wide open. BRYTE NO!!!!!!!! Y-y-you...YOU CAN'T DO THIS! WATTS Oh, but I can, and I have. You and Panther will go 1-on-1 at Angleslam to settle the score between you two. And that's not all. You see, gentlemen, in the past, your matches have been marred by all sorts of outside interference. Add to that the fact that Bryte, you CLEARLY don't want anything to do with Panther; its showed since his return to the company. And that's why I have decided to make this match between the two of you a Steel Cage match: no escape, pinfalls and submissions only. That way, we'll be able to keep all third parties out of this match, and we'll be able to keep you--Bryte--IN! And that way, once and for all, we're gonna have a clear winner! Bryte removes his shades and looks down at Taylor. He appears almost shell-shocked as he lowers himself back into his chair. Meanwhile, Panther's got a smile on his face a mile wide. Watts continues. WATTS Now, to prevent you two from causing any more trouble than you've already caused, until Sunday night, *I* am ordering the two of you to stay away from each other. Panther, I don't want you going near Bryte--I don't want you to even think about laying a hand on him--and the same thing goes for you, Bryte...you and your uncle. I want this thing to end this Sunday night in the cage, and if I find out that either one of you have disobeyed me, then I'll see to it that you're BOTH fired from the company. Have I made myself clear?! Watts looks in Panther's direction. Panther can barely contain his joy as he nods affirmatively. Watts then turns to Bryte, who reluctantly nods as well. WATTS Good. And with that, this meeting is adjourned! May the best man win! And with that, Watts storms out of the room and slams the door behind him. Bryte looks towards his uncle again, loosening his tie and collar button as sweat begins to pour down his brow. The then happens to glance over at Panther, who's glaring at him with possibly the most sinister look ever. Bryte does a McMahon-esque gulp lowers his head as the HeldDOWN logo scrolls the screen, taking us to live action and... (Go backstage) The cameras cut to a shot of Chris Stevens walking backstage, looking positively sour. COLE Man, I tell ya, Chris Stevens has to be burning after what went down last week! COACH Right you are, Mikey. He appeared to have everything in control, until Hoff interfered! COLE Hoff's interference led to Stevens getting hit with the Sharp End from Gunner Sharps, and it cost him the match to Gunner! COACH Well, word is that we'll hear from both Hoff and Gunner later on, but right now, we're going to send our own "Macho Man" Randy Savage to get a word with Stevens! Stevens keeps walking down a hallway, then turns left...and runs right into the Macho Man. MACHO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH YEAH!!! DIG IT! THE MACHO MAN HERE WITH-- STEVENS Get out of my way. Stevens simply pushes Savage into the wall and storms past him. The cameras keep following Stevens, as we hear Macho trailing off about Hogan in the background. COACH Whoa ho! Yikes! COLE Stevens in a hot temper tonight, and-- oh, look at this now! Stevens turns another corner, walking into a small room with a snack tray set up on a folding table. Inside the room, we see Gunner chatting away with a lovely young production assistant. Stevens' eyes narrow as he looks a hole through Gunner, who doesn't seem to notice. LOVELY YOUNG PRODUCTION ASSISTANT So he's really gonna do it? GUNNER Yeah, totally. He's as excited as I am. Maybe moreso. L.Y.P.A. Wow, that'll be neat! I can't wait! GUNNER Mmhmm. But how about you and I go out on the town tonight? You know, I don't live too far away, and you know what they say about guys with a big everything... Gunner smiles as the production girl swoons. L.Y.P.A. Tee hee, no, what's that? GUNNER Well.... STEVENS You. Gunner spins around suddenly as the production girle jumps a bit, startled by Stevens' voice. Gunner cocks his head and takes a step toward Stevens. GUNNER ...look, man, I didn't ask for that scumbag to come out either, and I-- STEVENS Just shut up a minute. Gunner looks perturbed, but remains silent. Stevens glances at the floor for a second, then turns his gaze back to the big man. STEVENS Know this: if you beat Hoff, if you win the 24/7 Title, I am coming for you. I will not hold a thing back. You and I aren't friends, and I don't want to be. Gunner crosses his arms, listening with a look of displeasure on his face. STEVENS You know as well as I do that that title should be mine. I should be the one getting ready to face you at AngleSlam...not him. Gunner nods slightly. STEVENS But what's done is done. I can't change what happened. I took a shot at Hoff, and I paid for it. You made the most of the situation. That's exactly what I'd have done...that's the mark of a champion. Gunner shows the faintest of smiles as Stevens steps close to him. STEVENS So this Sunday, at AngleSlam...go out there, and be a champion. Stevens pats Gunner on the bicep as the big man smiles thinly and nods. GUNNER You got it. Stevens smiles slightly as well, then turns around and heads out the door...but not before stopping in the doorway and looking back. STEVENS Oh, and Gunner? Put a little extra hurting on him for me. Stevens ducks out of the doorframe as Gunner nods, chuckling slightly. The production girl steps back up next to Gunner, looking out the door, then back up at Gunner as he laughs. COLE A show of class from Chris Stevens, and a message for Gunner. "Go out there, and be a champion. We'll be back. (Go to break) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break) The arena lights dim as "It's Goin' Down" hits the PA system. A dim blue hue covers the crowd, and white strobe lights flash upon the entrance. Watch them flee Watch them flee Wa...Wa...Watch them flee [hip hop hits] *Scratch**Scratch* And you do it like this... The crowd voices its disapproval as Chris Bryte struts onto the stage with Kevin Yancy Taylor trailing close behind; as always, Bryte's wearing his trademark shades. He taunts the fans from the stage, practically revelling in the boos before he and Taylor start down the ramp to the ring. BUFFER This contest is scheduled for one fall! Currently coming down the aisle...being accompanied by his uncle and media representative, Kevin Yancy Taylor...hailing from Topeka, Kansas and weighing in tonight at 175 pounds...he is the self-proclaimed Brytest Rising Star in Professional Wrestling...CHRIS...BRRRRRRRYYYYYYYTE! The crowd boos as Bryte throws up a double fist and slides into the ring. COLE Well there you see him. The one and only Chris Bryte. Last week this idiot made an ass out of himself and embarrassed us all again with a brutal...and absolutely unnecessary attack on Tina! She's not here tonight as a result of injuries she sustained in that attack, but fans, what made things worse was that this idiot had the gall to attack police officers. He attacked a couple of cops, then blindsided Panther--who had come to Tina's aid--leaving him bloodied and beaten as well. Bryte was arrested last week, and rightfully so. COACH Yeah, and right after Bill Watts took the time to admonish Panther about the negative publicity brought on by his arrests. COLE Exactly. Watts was none too happy, as we saw in that board meeting from earlier on, and consequently, the match has been signed for this Sunday night on PPV! It'll be a Steel Cage Match: Panther vs. Bryte! Pinfalls and submissions only, folks! And joining us right now... TAYLOR Yes Michael Cole, let it ring! Ring from the tops of the highest mountain right on down to the depths of the deepest canyon, for it is I...KEVIN...YANCY...TAYLOR, here to offer the two of you another lesson in broadcast journalism. I know that after the *smashing* job I did last week, the two off you are oh so happy to have me back. COLE Oh yes Kevin. We're just estatic. TAYLOR And I don't blame you. Hiya, Coach. How's the wife? Still inflatable? COLE Stop. Well Kevin, we were just discussing the match signed for Angleslam this sunday night... TAYLOR Oh, don't get me started on that piece of malarkey, Cole. That buffoon Bill Watts--who the heck does he think he is? My nephew has beaten Panther! He's beaten him just about everytime he's stepped in the ring with him. He should be finished with Panther, but instead, he's being strong-armed into another match--a cage match at that--and it's absolutely unfair. I mean, my nephew is not a barbarian! He does not deserve to be locked in a cage! He's being backed into a corner by these corrupt OAOAST officials, and if there's anyone out there who doubts that there's a grand conspiracy against my nephew Chris Bryte, well then look no further, because the proof is in the pudding! COACH Pudding? Where? COLE (rolls eyes) Well Kevin, I know you're upset about the signing of that match, but your nephew may not even make it to Angleslam! Not if this man has his way... The HeldDOWN logo scrolls the screen again, and we cut to pre-recorded comments from Bryte's opponent for the evening: Tommy Gunn. TOMMY GUNN The past month has been absolute hell for me and my family. It's been hell for us all ever since the day that The Hand wrapped his hands around my little brother Johnny's neck and choked him out of existance. My brother is dead thanks to The Hand, and Chris Bryte, call it what you will...an accident or what have you, but I hold you and that uncle of yours personally responsible. Now The Hand has already paid for his crimes, but the two of you are still running around here scot free. Not a care in the world! Living the good life. Well fellas, that life of yours is gonna go from good to non-existant once I get my hands on ya. Tonight, I'm gonna make you feel every bit of pain, every bit of suffering that you've caused me and my family and then some, and when I get through with you, you're gonna wish that you never heard the name of "J-Dogg" Johnny Gunn! Gunn glares intensely into the camera for a moment. The HeldDOWN logo then scrolls the scene a second time and we cut back to live action, where we're greeted to the opening chimes of Eminem's "The Way I Am." The crowd pops mildly as Tommy Gunn steps out onto the stage clad in a black denim vest and matching jeans, with a black armband around his right bicep with "JOHNNY" printed on it in white letters. BUFFER And his opponent...hailing from Seattle, Washington and weighing in at 222 pounds...here is TOMMY GUNN!!!!!! COACH You need to be careful, Kevy! Big Tom looks mad! TAYLOR Please, Coach! Me be careful of a slug like this? Don't make me laugh. This Tommy Gunn character has never amounted to a thing in his life! He's a talentless bum...10 years in the business and he's been curtain-jerking for all the way through. Heck...what does it say about the man when his biggest achievement was him darn near paralyzing himself in a wrestling ring? The man is total garbage! COLE Regardless of what he's accomplished, he's got a score to settle with you and Chris Bryte... Gunn sprints down the ramp, slides into the ring and puts Bryte flat on his back with a double leg takedown. *DING DING DING* COLE There's the bell and here we go! Tommy Gunn! Big brother Tommy is all over Chris Bryte! TAYLOR With ILLEGAL clinched fists! Tell it like it is, Cole! Gunn hammers down Bryte with hard right hands. Bryte blocks one of the punches and pulls Gunn into a front head-and-arm grip, scissoring his legs around his waist as well. Gunn struggles to escape the hold as Bryte applies pressure to the hold. TAYLOR And what about that, gang? What about the superb ring presence by the great Chris Bryte! COLE Nice counter by the Bryte man! He's got Tommy Gunn locked in this hold. Using his free hand, Gunn fires off an open hand strike to Bryte's right ear. A second blow causes him to break his grip, at which point, the elder Gunn begins raining rights and lefts down onto the rookie's head. Bryte's still got the body scissors applied, but is unable to capitalize as Gunn is just pummelling him on the canvas. As Bryte's grip begins to loosen, Gunn hooks his legs under both armpits and climbs to his feet, manuevering Bryte around to the point that his (Gunn's) back is facing a turnbuckle. Gunn then falls back, slingshotting Bryte headfirst into the ringpost. The crowd pops as the dazed Bryte staggers right staggers right back out towards the center of the ring, where he's mowed down with a hard clothesline. Bryte pops right back to his feet, but another clothesline sends him down. Bryte's back up again and staggers into the ropes, at which point, Gunn moves in and blasts him with a right hand. A second. Irish whip...reversal by Bryte sends Gunn to the far side. Bryte leap frogs over him when he comes off, then falls flat to the canvas upon landing, raising his legs for what looks to be a monkey flip attempt. Gunn has it scouted though, and when he comes off, he nails Bryte with a boot right to the top of the head. He then hooks Bryte wheelbarrow style, lifts him up off the canvas then drops him facefirst with a sitout reverse powerbomb. Bryte pulls himself back up to his knees, checking his mouth and nose for blood, at which point, Gunn runs to the ropes opposite him and catches him coming off with a devastating enzuigri! Gunn immediatly goes for the cover... COLE OH NO HE'S NOT GOING FOR THE COVER! TAYLOR LOOK AT THIS IDIOT! COACH HE'S BITING HIM! Indeed. Tommy Gunn takes a big bite out of the forehead of Chris Bryte, causing the rookie to scream and flail his legs wildly. TAYLOR Can you believe the audacity of this man?! What savage! What a brute! Damn it, Chris, I just hope you went and got all your shots like your father and I told you! The ref admonishes Gunn as Bryte rolls around on the mat, now bleeding slightly from the forehead. As the referee goes to check on Bryte, Gunn begins to unraval the tape around his wrists. Bryte pulls himself back to his feet as quickly as possible, hoping to halt the angry Gunn's attack, but he's still somewhat dazed, and ends up staggering right back into his opponent, who wraps the wrist tape around his throat. The crowd cheers loudly as Bryte begins to squirm, waving his arms around like a madman. He makes a dash to the ropes, hoping to get a break, but Gunn holds on, and both he and Bryte end up tumbling through the middle ropes and out to the arena floor, where both men land on their feet. With the tape still wrapped around his throat, Bryte pushes Gunn back up against a nearby ringpost, at which point he grabs two handfuls of hair and slams his head HARD up against the post. He does it once more, causing Gunn to break his grip and crumble to his knees TAYLOR HAHA! What a show of resilience by Chris Bryte! Admit it, you two! He's championship-bound! COLE Tommy Gunn is hurt on the outside. Gunn clutches at the back of his head as the referee looks on with concern from the ring. After taking a moment to get some air back into his lungs, Bryte walks over to Gunn and grabs him by the hair, pulling him back to his feet. He nails him with two hard kicks to his forehead before pulling him into a front facelock. The crowd boos Bryte hard, sensing what's coming next. COLE Oh no! COACH This is what did in Tina! With a look of intensity on his face, Bryte tosses Gunn's arm back over his head, hooks the tights and... COLE Oh! Gunn blocks it! Yes! Undaunted, Bryte tries it a second time, but again, Gunn hooks Bryte's leg with his own to block. TAYLOR C'mon Chris! C'mon! Gunn manages to reverse the move, lifting Bryte up into suplex position then dropping him sternum first onto the steel barricade. The crowd shows its approval for Gunn as Bryte clutches his chest and falls back into the front row. Wasting no time, Gunn heads over to the timekeeper's position, shoves Buffer aside and snatches his chair. The crowd gives a big pop as he folds up the chair and turns towards Sofa Central with rage in his eyes. COACH Uh oh! TAYLOR Michael Cole, you have done it now! Boy are *YOU* in trouble! COLE ME?! What do you mean me?! TAYLOR Oh come now, Mikey! We both know that you've been badmouthing J-Dogg for weeks now! COLE I have?! TAYLOR Oh yeah. The boys in the back have been talking, and it's all over the locker room. How you never liked him, and you're glad he's dead! COLE I...I never said that! COACH I dunno, Cole. I do kinda remember you saying that. COLE What are you talking about... TAYLOR Don't try and deny it now, Cole! It's been disgraceful how you've trashed that man's dead brother, and I for one do not blame Tommy Gunn for being mad...AT YOU! Taylor hides behind Cole to shield himself from Tommy Gunn's sight. Gunn starts towards Taylor, but just then, he spots Chris Bryte climbing back to his feet in the front row. Gunn springs into action, charging towards his foe and catching him with a hard chairshot to the back of the head that sends Bryte tumbling forward over the guardrail and back onto the ringside mats. The ref hops to the floor and warns Gunn about the chair usage, but Gunn ignores him and blast Bryte with a second shot, prompting the ref to call for the bell. *DING DING DING* BUFFER Here is your winner, as a result of a disqualification: CHRIS BRYTE! TAYLOR What a lunatic! COLE Tommy Gunn using that chair on Bryte! Tommy Gunn has been disqualified! COACH I don't think it matters though! Look at him! Gunn repeatedly bashes Bryte across the shoulder and in the ribs with the chair as the crowd cheers him on in the background. Slight chants of "Tommy" are starting up in the crowd as the ref tries to pull Gunn off of Bryte, but is promptly shoved to the floor for his troubles. Gunn then goes back to hitting Bryte again, as Taylor slowly begins to stand up at Sofa Central. COLE Hey...what are you doing?! Where are you going, Taylor?! Kevin places his index finger over his lips (signalling Cole to be quiet) before grabbing a coffee mug from the table. He removes his headset and creeps over to where Tommy Gunn is, coming up from behind! COLE Taylor's got that damn coffee mug! Don't tell me... COACH Well...they say caffeine can kill you... Taylor scrunches up his face as he brandishes the cup, shaking it as he gets closer and closer to to Tommy Gunn. Gunn happens to turn around, however, and goes face-to-face with Taylor before he can strike! TAYLOR Holy Shit! *CLANG* Gunn takes a wild swing at Taylor's head, but he ducks, and the chair ends up striking the ringpost. Kev then starts to beg off, extending the coffee mug to Gunn as a sort of peace offering... *CRASH* Gunn swats his hand with the chair, knocking the mug to the ground and shattering it. He then sends another chair swipe at Taylor's head, but he again manages to get out of dodge. He begins backpedaling around the ring, with Gunn following him every step of the way. COLE Kevin Yancy Taylor has stepped in it this time! Tommy Gunn has that steel chair and he is stalking him around the ring! He wants to make Bryte and Taylor pay for the death of his brother! And remember fans, we found out a few weeks back that it was actually Kevin Taylor that lured J-Dogg into the OAOAST! He tricked him into that match with The Hand! COACH Yeah, Bryte and Taylor caused the whole thing, and I can't wait to see that asshole get his right now! Taylor turns a corner of the ring, placing him near the bottom of the entrance ramp. As Gunn turns the corner to follow him, Taylor extends his right hand forward, asking for a handshake, but Gunn cocks the chair again, startling Taylor to the point that he trips and falls backwards to the arena floor. The crowd cheers wildly in the background as the angry Gunn hovers above Taylor with the chair in his hands, huffing and puffing as he glares down with a psychotic look on his face. Taylor looks like a dear caught in headlights as Gunn slowly raises the chair above his head... ...ONLY TO CATCH A LUNGING RIGHT HAND TO THE JAW FROM CHRIS BRYTE!!! COLE DAMN IT! Bryte saved Taylor's ass! The punch causes Gunn to drop the chair and stagger back into the steel stairs, and the crowd boos once more in the background as Taylor scrambles back to his feet and run around to the opposite side of the ring. Bryte clutches at his ribs as he reaches down and grabs the chair. He then looks up at Tommy Gunn with a slight smile mixed with pain. BRYTE You're gonna get it now! Bryte nods his head as he rears back with the chair and charges at Gunn, only to catch a boot to the midsection for his troubles. Gunn staggers Bryte with a hard right hand, then snatches the chair from his hands and clocks him over the head with it. The crowd pops once more as Bryte spins out and falls to his knees! COLE Bryte got nailed again! Bryte is down... COACH What's he doing now?! With Bryte trying to clear the cobwebs, Gunn looks up at the top rope for a moment. He then tosses the chair to the ground, pounds his chest with his right hand and points up to the heavens before climbing up onto the apron. COACH Where the hell is he going?! COLE Well...both Tommy and his brother were known as high risk takers throughout their careers! We may be getting set to see another one of those risks. The crowd clamors as Gunn scales the turnbuckles with his back turned to Bryte. He plants both feet on the middle turnbuckle, then looks back over his shoulder to see Bryte groggily pull himself back to his feet. COACH He's not gonna moonsault him, is he?! That looks to be what Gunn is planning. But just as Bryte turns back to face him, Taylor climbs up onto the apron and sprays Gunn in the face with mace. Gunn grabs his eyes with both hands as Bryte, seizing the opportunity, climbs upon the apron and catches Gunn with a hard forearm to the back, causing him to fall forward and drape himself over the top turnbuckle. Bryte then starts to unload on the helpless Gunn, nailing him with hard forearms and open hand strikes to the back as Taylor hops down and begins peeling up the ringside mats below him. COLE What in the hell is that asshole doing now?! COACH I dunno. Taylor just pulled up those mats...Bryte's got Gunn on the ropes... With the concrete below him now exposed, Bryte slowly begins to peel Gunn off the top rope, manuevering him onto his back and hooking his arms for a vertebreaker! COLE Oh my God...don't tell me! He...he wouldn't! Gunn tries to fight it, but its no use as Bryte falls back from the apron and drops him with the Bryte Side! The crowd gasps, and LOUD chants of "Holy Shit" begin to echo throughout the arena! COLE OH MY GOD!!!! MY GOD!!!! HE JUST GAVE TOMMY GUNN THE BRYTE SIDE FROM THE APRON DOWN ONTO THE EXPOSED CONCRETE!!!!!! COACH Can you believe he just did that?! EMTs begin rushing down to the ring as Bryte pulls himself back to his feet, pointing down at his injured as Taylor laughs in the background. The boos from the crowd are deafening! COLE This son of a bitch! What a no good bastard Chris Bryte is! COACH He broke his neck, Cole! He had to! COLE Gunn is down and he is not moving, and what the hell was the purpose of that?! To injure another human being like that! I...I just can't believe he would do something like that! Are there no depths to which Chris Bryte will not stoop?! Taylor raises Bryte's hand and the crowd continues to boo as they head back up the ramp to the locker room. We then cut to a close-up of Gunn's body as he lay motionless on the concrete floor. COACH Jeez, I'd hate to do this, but we really need to move onto our next segment. Hopefully this mess will be cleaned up when we get back. Good lord.....just...wow... (Go to a video) Our scene is set in a fine gentlemens' establishment. A male voice sets the scene for us. "It was a dark Thursday night, and in Ann Arbor, Michigan, Thursday nights are just like any other night. People are always doing either two things; hurting themselves, or looking to get lucky. And I'm always around to assist with both goals." Dr. Max Anderson steps into the club, with Dr. Steven Pigley close behind. "That's me, right there. I'm the taller, slender one. My partner Steven is the less attractive one, you see. He feels that by latching onto me, he can develop some of the same ladykilling skill that has been perfected by Dr. Max Anderson. I've never wanted to break his heart, but we all know who the ladykiller is in our tandem, and who's just a hanger-on." Max and Steven walk over to the bar, taking two available seats and beginning to chat it up with the attractive bartendress. "Steven was under the impression that he could outdo me in this situation. But I'm Dr. Max Anderson, I've never been outdone, and just because he's my tag team partner doesn't mean I was going to let him." Max pauses. "Well, there was one time I've been outdone... I was twenty-four and fresh out of medical school when I met her. They wheeled her into the emergency room after a bad accident with her boyfriend, a carrot, and a tube of lubricant. I only wish I could make up this kind of story, but I'll tell you, it wasn't pretty." In the picture, Max takes the bartendress by the hand, kissing it. She giggles and pulls away, going back to her drinks. "I told her that I could save him, and I told her that while she already had a hell of a guy, she could have a better one if she'd come home with me. And she did, and we fell in love right then and there. I'll tell you, it was a beautiful thing." The bartendress comes back, handing the two doctors their drinks. "It was an even more beautiful thing six months later, when I got down on bended knee and proposed to her. I loved her, and I was sure I'd never feel that way again. But she came clean with me." Max slams his drink onto the bar inexplicably, and Steven and the bartendress, who were chatting it up just seconds before, stare at him. "She told me that she had been seeing a guy on the side for two months. And that he was a wrestler and that she loved him. She never did tell me his name, just that he was a wrestler and that he was in the OAOAST. I loved the girl, and she broke my heart. I knew I could never be a doctor again. I had to come to the OAOAST. I had to kill the man who stole my girl." Max grabs Dr. Steven Pigley, exiting the bar. "I always wanted to help people. Now, I'm going to help myself. My name is Dr. Max Anderson." "Don't forget it." (Go to break) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break) COLE You know Coach, that cage has been hanging over the ring all night, and we still don't know why. COACH Mikey, I think even worse than not knowing what it's here for is knowing what could take place inside it this Sunday. Suddenly, "Nothing" kicks up, and the fans explode with jeers as the lights dim. Through the golden pyro shower than encases the entranceway walks the OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion, Zack Malibu. Dressed to kill in black pants and a metallic gray, almost silver button down shirt, Zack strolls to the ring with his title belt draped over his shoulder. After circling ringside to take possession of the microphone from Michael Buffer, Malibu steps into the ring and holds his belt up as the blue spotlight shines down on him, illuminating his cocky pose for all the crowd to see. Zack continues to pace the ring and trash talk the fans as his music fades, and once the lights come up, we see many a fan weilding an anti-Zack sign, or taunting the champ right back. Despite the heckling, Malibu proceeds to start his promo, until he's sidetracked by the crowd chanting his name in a rather aggrivating tone. "MAL-I-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" "MAL-I-BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" His cocky swagger and smirk replaced with a sickened scowl, Malibu takes the mic to his lips and speaks. MALIBU Very cute. Rather witty too, I might add. But just because you can say my name doesn't mean that you know who I am, people. Not one of you sitting in a seat, whether it's on the floor or up in the nosebleeds has any idea of who I am anymore! Face it, the Zack Malibu you want is long gone. The one you think I am...hell, you haven't seen ANYTHING yet, and that's why I'm out here tonight. I'm out here to enlighten you all about something. I'm here to tell you exactly what's going to happen when this monstrosity, this structure that hangs above our heads surrounds the ring this Sunday. So do yourselves a favor, and just sit back, all you guys take a few more sips of beer so that you can gain the beer balls to boo me...go ahead, do it. All you women, and you pissant brats out there, go on and stuff your faces full of nacho's and that cardboard pizza they're serving...hell, I don't care what you do, as long as you sit back, shut up, and let me tell you about the facts of life. COACH Man, why does he wanna talk about THAT show? I mean, Tutti was hot, but that was the only thing good about it. COLE I don't think he meant the sitcom, Coach. And everyone knows Blair was the hottest. COACH Whoa, Mikey Cole big pimpin' on the c-lebs! COLE Um...ok, Coach. MALIBU You see, this Sunday, the OAOAST once again will make history on something I do. They will once again reap the benefits that my name value and my championship reign can bring them. This Sunday, when we cross the pond into jolly ol' England, the tension will be at a fever pitch. People will be on the edge of their seats. Then, as the night draws to a close and Michael Buffer announces that final match, you fans will pop as you hear "Set It Off" for the last time! COACH Is Crystal changing her theme after the show? COLE Somehow, I don't think that's what he means, Jonathan. MALIBU That's right, I said for the LAST time. When Crystal walks to that ring, looking all spunky and focused like a ball of fire, you'll cheer her. You'll encourage her. You'll want her to kick my ass, right? The fans cheer, and some simply shout out "Yeah!" as an answer to Malibu's question. MALIBU Well then, I hope you don't have guilty conscience's, because it will be YOU who pushes Crystal into this...it will be YOU who makes her sign her death warrant, because I guarantee you there is no way she's walking out of London, England PERIOD, nevermind with MY OAOAST World Title around her scrawny little waist! The crowd boos, and Malibu simply laughs to himself, as he suckered them into that one pretty well. MALIBU Heh, go ahead and boo. Boo me now, because you know what, you won't be doing that for long. You see, you fans are far too fickle. You're all nothing more than bandwagon jumpers, ready to latch onto the next big thing and ride the wave until it dies out. Just a few months back, you were dying...DYING for Sly Sommers to be your hero, and he couldn't cut hit, could he? Then it was that primadonna Northstar, a man who couldn't STAND you people and did everything in his power to ruin this company...but because he opened his mouth to me, you cheered him? Now, it's Crystal's turn. Well, I've got news for you people...after this Sunday, she won't be around anymore. She'll be a broken shell of a girl spending her nights thinking about what could have been as the Canadian nights grow colder. She'll be just another notch in my belt, a footnote in the history of this company. Come this Sunday, you'll realize, as I walk out of that ring with this belt held high above my head that I was RIGHT! That I warned you that the dream was over for Crystal! And like the sheepdogs you are, you'll see that I'm everything I claim to be and more! You'll see that this company runs on MY star power! That this belt BELONGS AROUND MY WAIST! You'll see that Zack Malibu is the one true star in this company, head and shoulders above everybody else, and you will WANT to cheer me! You'll be BEGGING to be my fans again! You'll make signs, you'll call my name, you'll roar in approval at the things I do...and I won't care less! Because it was YOU PEOPLE WHO MADE THIS HAPPEN! YOU turned your backs on ME! YOU are responsible for Crystal's fall from grace! YOU are responsible for setting up these "heroes" of yours like bowling pins, only for me and The Thrillogy to knock them down! Then you want to crawl back to me, realizing that there's no hope, no "new era" about to start? I DON'T THINK SO! When I walk into arenas, and little Bobby runs up for an autograph, do you think I'll sign it? NO! NO! What I WILL do is tell him that he's nothing more than the result of an unwanted pregnancy! If I'm at the bar, and someone claims to be my biggest fan and wants to buy me a drink...I'll take it. I'll take it, and I'll spit it right in his god damn face, because I don't NEED his praise. I don't NEED your support! I don't... Avril Lavigne's "My Happy Ending" cues up and cuts Zack off, and the fans go WILD, as Northstar appears on the ramp, making his first hD~! appearance in weeks! COLE It's Northstar! COACH He's the last person I expected to see tonight. The eccentric superstar strust down the aisleway, slapping a few hands on his stroll to the ring, while Malibu storms around inside the squared circle, pissed off that he's been interrupted. Northstar then raises his arm up, showing that he's got a mic in his hand, and jumps up onto the apron, looking Zack dead in the eye. NORTHSTAR Hellllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllo, Zackary! *crowd pops* Malibu fumes as his old rival enters the ring, grinning like a Cheshire cat. NORTHSTAR Zack, I can't believe you. I mean, I know you're a cocky son of a bitch. I also know that you're apparently no longer on your meds, and these mood swings of yours are getting out of control. But, let me give you a little dose of reality. You see these people out here, the ones that you're ashamed of? The ones that you don't want the support of? You think that they're THAT desperate to cheer you again? Zack, honey bunches of oats, there is no way in hell that ANYONE in this crowd, or any other crowd across the globe wants to cheer YOU! In fact, call me crazy, but I think the last person they want around here is YOU! It wasn't the fans that made you this way, Zack. It wasn't the company...it was just your true shelf breaking through the shell. You put up a front for so long Zack, and heavens knows I TRIED to tell these people...but I didn't have the bond with them that you had. You put one over on them for the longest time, Zack. You did a nice job of playing spin doctor and made me out to look bad. You tried to cut Sly's career short. And for a fighting champion, you've been making excuses about Crystal's abilities since School's Out when she almost took the title on her first try. Now, admittedly I've had some Hollywood stuff going on which has kept me away from here, but I can also admit that while I'm SO looking forward to Crystal becoming the first female World Champion this Sunday, that I wish it were you and ME in the Survive Or Surrender match! The crowd roars, as a perplexed Malibu eyes Northstar. MALIBU You...you can't be serious. You wish it were YOU in the cage? NORTHSTAR I do, love. I do. MALIBU You know, Northstar, you're a weird guy. A VERY weird guy...and that was probably the stupidest thing that ever came out of your mouth. All I have to say is... WHAM~! Northstar gets nailed with a belthshot from Zack, who picks up his mic and finishes his sentence. MALIBU ...be careful what you wish for! With that, Malibu starts stomping the hell out of the downed Northstar, then quickly picks up the mic again. MALIBU CALVIN! HOFF! CANDIE! ANYONE OF YOU...LOWER IT! LOWER IT NOW! Malibu continues beating on Northstar, and suddenly the sound of the cage moving lower to the crowd shocks the crowd. The Survive Or Surrender cage is being lowered down! COLE Look at this! Somebody break up this madness! With Northstar still clutching his head, Zack quickly rolls out of the ring and grabs a steel chair, sliding it in and then sliding it under the bottom rope just as the cage is put in place. Northstar stands up, a fresh cut opened on his forehead thanks to the beltshot, but it seems to light a fire under him, as he tackles Zack before Malibu can pick up the steel chair. Northstar mounts Zack's shoulders, pinning him down to the mat, and hammering him with wild lefts and rights! COACH Whoa! It might be Zack who doesn't make it out of the cage TONIGHT~! The crowd is at a fever pitch, as Northstar stands up and takes the chair into his hands, raising it above his head...but then gets struck with a low blow by Malibu! Northstar drops the chair and falls to his knees, as Zack gets up, his face red with anger as he looks at his old enemy. Malibu takes the chair, and Northstar tries to get his hands up to deflect the shot, but can't... CRACK~! ...and Malibu levels him across the top of the head with a chairshot! Northstar falls backwards, more blood pouring out of the cut, as it's been widened. The blood stains the mat as Northstar rolls onto his stomach, but that doesn't stop Zack, who raises the chair up and brings it down across Northstar's back! And again! And again! And AGAIN! AND AGAIN! Northstar groans in pain after every shot, his spine absorbing the full impact of the blows. Malibu reaches down, pulling Northstar up by the head and leading him into the corner, where he stands him. Northstar, unable to stand on his own, slumps down as Zack backs off, reaching into his pocket for... BRASS KNUX! Malibu slides the brass knuckles onto his hand, and takes Northstar by the head, then viciously pounds on the cut with his right, knux covered hand! Northstar weakly grabs Zack's arm, trying to push him away, but Zack takes him by the head and leads him across the ring before throwing him facefirst into the cage wall! COLE This is a massacre! Somebody stop this! Northstar crawls across the mat, a trail of blood left in his wake, as Malibu picks up the microphone. Seeing NS trying to push himself to his feet, Malibu runs at him and nails him in the ribs with a soccer kick, doubling Northstar over! MALIBU IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED!? IS IT!? IS THIS WHAT YOU WANTED!? YOU KNOW WHO I AM, NORTHSTAR! YOU KNEW! YOU KNEW WHAT WOULD HAPPEN TO YOU! I'M ZACK MALIBU, DAMMIT! Zack drops to his knees, rolling Northstar over and again pounding on his forehead with brass knuckle shots. Northstar is COVERED in blood, as his normally flamboyant looks have been replaced by a crimson mask. Malibu pulls him up and walks him over to the wall of the cage that faces the aisleway, and just rakes Northstar's face against the steel mesh, covering it in his blood! MALIBU TAKE A LOOK! WHOEVER IS BACK THERE, LOOK AT HIS FACE! CRYSTAL! CRYSTAL! THIS IS YOU, CRYSTAL! THIS IS YOU! Malibu delivers a final, sickening rake to Northstar's face before letting him drop to the canvas, tucking his head to try and avoid any further damage. Malibu turns to him, but suddenly the crowd pops HUGE... ...it's Sly Sommers and Crystal! COACH All right, baby! COLE How can they help him though, Coach! They're locked inside the cage! Remember, no way for anyone to get in or out! Crystal and Sly rush down the aisle, but stop short when they realize what they're dealing with. Malibu turns as he hears the crowd roaring, and walks over to the side of the cage, eyeing Crystal. MALIBU You want to save him? You want to save him? YOU CAN'T SAVE HIM! HE'S MINE! JUST LIKE YOU'LL BE MINE THIS SUNDAY! Malibu turns around and drops to the mat, again pounding on Northstar's face. Once again, Northstar is led up to his feet, and Malibu drags him over to the cage wall facing Crystal and Sly, then rubs his face hard into the mesh. MALIBU DO YOU SEE THIS? DO YOU? THIS IS YOU, CRYSTAL! THIS IS GOING TO BE YOU!! Northstar can't take anymore, and screams in pain, while Crystal turns away in disgust, unable to take the torture her friend is going through. Crystal freezes, unsure of what to do, until Sly calls back to the dressing room, telling someone, ANYONE to go and find the controls that will lift the cage up so Northstar can be spared. Meanwhile back in the ring, Malibu drops the mic and takes the chair in his hands once again, leaning Northstar up against the ropes before FLOORING him with a sick chairshot! Northstar falls forward, unable to fight back anymore...but Malibu keeps on him, rolling him onto his back and driving the chair edge down into his throat repeatedly! Zack turns back to look at Crystal, who mouths "you sonofabitch" to him and tries to climb the cage wall...but Malibu hammers the wall with the chair, nearly breaking her hands! Crystal jumps back down, angered that she can't do anything about this. COLE My God this is just brutal! We need to get some help out here! COACH Wire cutters, bolt cutters, SOMETHING! C'mon Sly...ANYONE! With Northstar gagging on his own blood, Malibu stands over him, holding the chair in one hand and the mic in another. MALIBU Crystal...it didn't have to be this way. I tried to tell you. God knows I tried to spare you...BUT YOU WOULDN'T LISTEN WOULD YOU!? NONE OF YOU EVER LISTEN TO ME! LISTEN TO ME! DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM!? DO YOU KNOW...NO! NO YOU DON'T! The pyschotic Malibu pulls Northstar up, acting as the only support for his limp body as it struggles to stand on spaghetti legs. MALIBU SUNDAY NIGHT, THIS IS YOU! DO YOU HEAR ME! YOU CANNOT CHANGE YOUR FATE, CRYSTAL! YOU CANNOT DO THIS TO ME, DO YOU UNDERSTAND! THIS IS YOU! THIS IS YOUR FAULT! YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS! Malibu throws the mic down and takes the chair, folding it OVER Northstar's head so that it's stuck in the opening! Zack shoves Northstar down to the canvas, and both Crystal and Sly are now joined by the GPX, Leon Rodez, even Jim Cornette and Josh Matthews rush out in concern for Northstar. Malibu runs around the ring like a wildman, kicking the cage walls and calling everyone on to come get him, before going to the corner near Northstar. Malibu hops up onto the top rope, his evil eyes focused on the fallen fan favorite in the ring. COLE No, for the love God Zack, think twice! COACH He can't Michael, he just can't... He can, and he does! Malibu jumps off the top, stomping down on the edge of the chair so that it closes down on Northstar's throat! COLE MY GOD NO! HE'S GOING TO KILL THIS MAN! Blood is immediately coughed up, and the ring canvas is now more red than it's usual blue tint. Zack Malibu shows no remorse or concern, as he simply walks over to where his World belt lays, and scoops it up, then walks over to Northstar's fallen body and stands over it, raising the belt up high to the largest amount of heel heat you'll ever hear. COACH Is it over! I mean, is he finally... COLE I don't know what to say right now, fans... As Malibu poses, the cage shakes slightly, scaring him, but drawing a pop from the crowd. Suddenly, the cage begins to lift up, and the enraged OAOAST roster begin to fill the ring! Malibu backs off, but none are coming for him, as everyone is more concerned with Northstar. Medics are already in place and enter the ring, asking the talent to back away while they tend to him. Malibu stands in the background, smirking at what he's done, until Crystal turns to him and bolts for him, only to be held back by Sly Sommers and Scotty Static. Crying and enraged, Crystal has choice words for Zack, telling him "I'll kill you for this, Zack! I swear I'll kill you for this!" In typical Malibu fashion, he brushes it off, and quietly ducks out of the ring, as the OAOAST roster members look on in disbelief at his passive attitude towards this vicious assault. Malibu walks up the ramp, and the scene cuts back to the ring, where everyone in attendance watches on with grave concern. Northstar is loaded up on a stretcher, and despite their efforts to clean him off, blood is still dripping from his head. Crystal is the most upset of all, not only for her friend, but perhaps out of fear of what could come this Sunday when she's confined within the Survive Or Surrender cage. COLE Fans...I...I'm honestly speechless right now. I don't think it's fair to sensationalize this assault, or to use it as a ratings grabber, so I'm asking that we cut to commercial while we deal with this. Just cut...I don't care if it's commercial time, just take us off the friggin' channel for a bit. Cut. (Go to a loooooong break) (Return from long break) COLE Okay, um...we're back. So...let's get on with the show. Shall we? Yep. COACH Well, this match should be a barnburner, it's the debut of "El Guapo Guerrero" Rick Shirley.. COLE Ugh.. COACH He'll be facing Phoenix here. Haha. COLE This might be an easy test for this weird man COACH I hear he's ready backstage [We cut to "El Guapo Guerrero" Rick Shirley prancing around backstage.] SHIRLEY I feel pretty! Oh so pretty! I feel pretty and pretty and gay! and I pity, any boy who I face tonight! Colesy and Coach Man get to call it, but we know that I am going to be winning. Phoenix.. i'm going to make you feel things you ain't ever felt before. Sweetie, you better hope I'm a good doctor tonight. Because I'll be doing a search on you. Awww yeeaaah! I'll find my keys daddio! Mah god, I'll make you a maaaaan! Owww-ast.. I will show you that I am special and I am ready to kick some ass! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHH YEEEEEEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHH [We cut back to ringside. Where Coach is disgusted and Cole is bent over a trash can] ANNOUNCER In the ring, from El Paso, Texas, weighing in at 185 pounds, Phoenix! [We see Phoenix in the ring] [The lights dim] ANNOUNCER Coming down the aisle, from the Valley of Love and War, weighing in at 230 pounds, "El Guapo Guerrero" Rick Shirley! ["All you need is love" by the Beatles starts to play. Confetti starts falling from the ceiling. We see El Guapo Guerrero walk out to the jeers of the fans. He's carrying his confetti-gun. He struts down to the ringside area. He then gets on the announcers table and starts to dance in front of Michael Cole.] COACH Come on Cole, put a dollar bill down his tights SHIRLEY Big boy, that's not all you can put there! COLE Bleeeccchhh [shirley jumps off of the table and slides into the ring. He stands on the second turnbuckle and fires confetti into the crowd.] COLE This is sick COACH Well, the match has started Shirley locks up with Phoenix and then breaks the lockup. He goes behind Phoenix and smacks him on the ass. Phoenix replies with punches and Shirley counters with a Judo takedown. Shirley pins Phoenix's wrists to the ground and licks his chest. COLE I hate this Shirley lifts Phoenix to his feet and slams him on the canvas. He then gives him an elbowdrop. Shirley blows Phoenix a kiss as he gets up. COLE These fans aren't liking Rick Shirley COACH Intolerant people.. it's because he's half-Latino Shirley pinches Phoenix's cheek and Phoenix whips Shirley towards the ropes and hits him with a dropkick, sending Shirley to the floor. Shirley lays on the railing and Phoenix charges towards him with a tope but Shirley moves and Phoenix hits the guardrail. COLE This might be it for Phoenix. Shirley smiles and lifts Phoenix up to his feet. He then whips Phoenix into the ringpost. Shirley prances towards Phoenix and throws him into the ring. Shirley then picks Phoenix up and kisses him on the mouth. COLE That's just too much! Shirley then picks Phoenix up and hits the Heartbreak Hotel on him. Shirley hooks a leg and covers Phoenix with his crotch directly over Phoenix's face. ONE! TWO! THREE! COLE Rick Shirley is your winner! COACH And he's making out with Phoenix.. COLE That was a disturbing match COACH And he's carrying Phoenix to the back. Somebody's gonna get some tonight! COLE Oh god.. let's go to break COACH Hopefully Rick Shirley respects the Luchadore tradition and allows Phoenix to keep his mask on during anal sex.. COLE Oh.. bbbblaaaaaarrrggghhhh [Rick Shirley walks up to the announcers table and puts Phoenix down on the table] SHIRLEY Oh Colesy.. care to join me and Phoenix in a Hardcore match? COLE Oh god.. COACH Come on Cole, give in to your homosexual urges! SHIRLEY Coach Man.. you're invited too COACH No thanks, I got some work to do. SHIRLEY I got a big announcement.. Colesy, it could pertain to you too. [Rick Shirley gets the mic from the ring announcer.] SHIRLEY Boys and Girls.. I got a huuuuuuge opportunity. I'm launching my own.. [shirley smiles] SHIRLEY oh.. it's too much.. it's a DIVA SEARCH! It's open to any male or female, ages 18 to 27, to join me as my diva. If you win, you get a $300 dollar a month contract, you're bound to be my sex slave and you get your name known. Send your one minute tapes in any streaming format and any info to me at [email protected]. It's an opportunity of a lifetime, even for Michael Cole. Oooooooh yeeeeah. [shirley tosses the mic down and walks up to Cole. Shirley then licks his bicep and hugs Cole before picking up Phoenix and walking off.] COLE Does it disturb anybody that we didn't even try to save Phoenix? COACH Well, do you want to get in the way of El Guapo Guerrero? COLE Still.. I feel bad COACH Well, does he pay that diva contract in rape dollars? COLE That's just fucked up.. let's move on COACH You should enter the contest! COLE Let's go to a break (Do what Coach says!!!!!!!!) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break) CORNETTE We're back live, from Ann Arbor, Michigan, formerly known as Arm & Hammer Baking Soda, Michigan, because city officials tried to cover up the stink of this "town", with the debut edition of an old-time classic -- The Louisville Slugger! I'm your host Jim Cornette. Now that the New New Midnight Express are right where they belong as kings of tag team wrestling--one of the questions I'm asked the most from pimply-faced fanboys is: "What's the deal with Simon & Ned? I don't know much about them." Well, my special guests on the Louisville Slugger will spill the beans right after this. HeldDOWN~! OAOAST TAG TEAM TITLE MATCH The New New Midnight Express vs. The Global Party XChange BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, HeldDown continues with a battle for the OAOAST tag team championship of the world. It is set for one fall. Introducing first, the challengers, to be introduced by their manager. With the tinted blue tag titles around their waist, the Midnights follow Jim Cornette to the ring. CORNETTE They're two walking weapons of mass destruction, the real OAOAST tag team champions, "Sarcastic" Simon & "Narcissistic" Ned, the New New Midnight Express! GPX appear on stage, locking eyes with the NNMX, then... BUFFER ...Their opponents, from Hotlanta & the 313 respectively, Scotty Static & Johnny "Jam" Jackson, the OAOAST tag team champions of the world...The Global Party XChange! In a world full of posers, phonies, and pure wannabees, there finally emerges a group which has come to the set the record straight. So all you suckers better recognize, ya heard Can you say uhhh na na na na... The music transitions to "Chase," the NNMX's theme. ...GPX run to the ring, the NNMX stomping them as they slide underneath the bottom rope. Simon & Ned with a fury of punches. GPX fight back with their own, eventually taking the momentum away from the NNMX. Johnny whips Ned into the ropes and catches Blanchard coming back at him. SWINGING BEARHUG INTO URANAGE (Rock Bottom). Scotty with a legsweep on Simon, SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT... Singleton & Blanchard clubber Johnny before whipping him into the ropes. Flapjack coming up. SPRINGBOARD DROPKICK by Scotty just as the NNMX were about to hit the FLAPJACK, which was COUNTERED INTO A DOUBLE DDT~! Scotty with a PESCADO onto the NNMX & Jim Cornette! Static hurdled the top rope and came down on Cornette & the Express with a cross-bodyblock... Ned with a gutwrench suplex. Tagged made to Simon. "Sarcastic" Simon with a FLYING KNEEDROP TO THE CHEST... Simon rolls Scotty over on his stomach. He wraps up Static's ankles, grabs his chin and swings back. BOW & ARROW... Blanchard with a front facelock...SLINGSHOT SUPLEX. "Sarcastic" Simon scoopes up Scotty. SLINGSHOT BACKBREAKER! Singleton motions to the top. Ned comes into the ring, places one hand under Simon's thigh, the other near on his upper chest... THE ROCKET LAUNCHER! No! Scotty GOT HIS KNEES UP... GPX with a DOUBLE HIP TOSS! GPX hit THE VEGOMATIC~! Johnny with the BEAT DROP~! on Simon. "Narcissistic" Ned rams Scotty into the guardrails... Simon & Ned double-team JJ, then whip him into the ropes. He ducks a double-clothesline attempt and hits one of his own. The crowd stands firmly behind Johnny, chanting his name. Jackson ducks a right hand from Blanchard and lifts him up for a back suplex, but Ned floats over and nails Johnny behind the head with an ENZIGURI, bouncing him off the turnbuckle. Simon rolls him up in a SMALL PACKAGE. 1... 2... 3! * DING DING DING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners, and new professional wrestling tag team champions of the world, "Sarcastic" Simon & "Narcissistic" Ned, the New New Midnight Express. Simon & Ned raise their arms in victory, elated. The NNXM kiss the belts then strap them around their waists. The NNMX pose with Cornette holding the tinted blue belts behind them. A banner reading "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED" lowers from the rafters. If you thought the OAOAST couldn't get anymore retro, Jim Cornette is standing on the interview stage positioned on the side of the set. CORNETTE Whooooo! Am I a man of my word or what? I told the wrestling world my New New Midnight Express would become tag team champions, and last week they did just that, beating the Global Party XChange. So spit that pizza out, put down your beer, because ladies and gentlemen, here they are, if they could rearrange the alphabet they'd put "F" & "U" together, the undisputed OAOAST tag team champions of the world, "Sarcastic" Simon & "Narcissistic" Ned...the New New Midnight Express! With a beat to their step the NNMX walk down the aisle, carrying the old and new tag titles over their shoulders as "Chase" blares through the arena. Their long, bright orange robes with black trim certainly stand out. But don't you just love tag teams wearing matching ring attire? Oh, the unity. Once the Midnights are in the ring, they share a manly group hug with their polyster-loving manager. NED Owww, I feel good! CORNETTE (laughing) You look good, too. You both do, as a matter of fact, moreso now that you have tag team gold around your waists. But let's get right to it--tell the people a little bit about yourselves. Simon, let's start with you. SIMON Hi. My name is Simon Singleton, a.k.a. "Sarcastic" Simon. CORNETTE & "NARCISSISTIC" NED Hi, "Sarcastic" Simon. SIMON Hi. I was born and raised in Charleston, South Carolina, grew up on the National Wrestling Alliance, Ric Flair, Jim Cornette & the Midnight Express. Little did I know years later I'd hook up with Jimmy and form the most successful incarnation of the Midnights since Eaton & Lane. I began training as a wrestler when I was 17, had my first pro match when I was 22, toured the independent circuit until coming across another man by the name of Ned Blanchard. Ned & I have been a team ever since. In early 2004, we wrestled at an indy show in Ohio, where none other than Jim Cornette was in attendence, scouting talent. He tried to get us into OVW, but we wanted nothing to do with Vinnie Mac's circus. We got offers from other promotions offering us more money and guaranteed title shots but Jimmy said he knew the perfect place for us--the OAOAST. Why? Because a year or so earlier, Jimmy got screwed over by the suits and some punk kid pretending to be a mat purist. Last week we cleansed the sins of wrestlings past. We stand before you today...champions! CORNETTE Amen, brother Simon. Neddy, it's all yours. NED Hi. My name is Ned Blanchard, a.k.a. "Narcissistic" Ned. CORNETTE & "SARCASTIC" SIMON Hi, "Narcissistic" Ned. NED Blanchard's the name, wrestling's my game. I'm young, I'm hung, I look like I was carved out of stone, but look, don't touch. CORNETTE Neddy, I understand you were a bit rambunctious when you were younger. SIMON You're putting Oprah to shame, Jimmy. CORNETTE Well, I kinda thought of myself more as a Sally Jessie Raphael-type but I recently served on a jury, so I guess we kinda do have something in common. Some guy was on trial for assaulting a clerk at Dairy Queen. I kinda sympathized with him, you know? It was a hung jury. That wasn't the only thing hung that night if you get my drift. NED I love the women, and the women love me. I'm a chick magnate, attracting the hottest women in Hollywood the likes of Nicole Kidman, J-Lo -- but I did it to tap that ass. The only footnote in history I want to leave behind is being apart of the greatest tag team in OAOAST history, not J-Lo's fourth "husband" -- I've even dated Cher. Paris Hilton wanted of piece of this (rubbing his chest) but I'm no man-whore. CORNETTE You know I used to manage a gigolo? NED Jimmy Del Ray. SIMON Are you Jimmy Ray? Are you Jimmy Ray? Who wants to know? Who wants to know about...? CORNETTE Well, I kinda thought of myself more as a Sally Jessie Raphael-type but I recently served on a jury, so I guess we kinda do have something in common. Some guy was on trial for assaulting a clerk at Dairy Queen. I kinda sympathized with him, you know? I was the only one who voted not guilty, causing a hung jury. That wasn't the only thing hung that night if you get my drift. Anyhoo, let's talk about AngleSlam and our match against Black T. Even though we just won the titles last week, the new champs must fulfill the contractual obligations of the previous titleholders. Meaning: the New New Midnight Express must face Black T at AngleSlam. NED Well, Jimmy, we came thisclose to defeating Black T at License to Pin. It was a tough back-and-forth match that showcased the renewed intensity in the tag division. A lot of people wonder why we don't get along with Black T. (Holding up the tag title) This is why--the tag team championship, the fuel that starts our fire. We don't hate Black T, but when they want something that means so much to us, it's personal. Tag team wrestling has become a lost art in a world where the glitz and glamour of singles fame corrupts the minds of many. Take the United States Olympic basketball team for example--full of singles stars who cannot make an outside shot to save their lives. That separates us from every other tag team in the OAOAST, we're a team that'll do the little things to win. CORNETTE I couldn't have said it better myself. Dan Black & T-Bod, this time we're the champions and you're the challengers. Now you have to beat us. After we're done with you, you're gonna be wishing you were facing GPX instead of the NNMX. "Chase" hits as the NNMX & Cornette taunt the fans. COLE The NNMX very confident going into AngleSlam this Sunday. Black T thought their return shot would come against GPX but it wasn't met to be, the NNMX defeated them for the gold and will take their place against the former champions, the team many claim restored the pride into tag team wrestling in the OAOAST. What a match it'll be. Jim Cornette's New New Midnight Express vs. Jivin' J.R.'s Black T. Cornette & the Midnights continue to taunt the fans as we go to break... ...Or so we thought. The "Mission Accomplished" banner falls on top of all 3 men who fight their way out of it. Looking confused, the guys grab their titles and hightail it -- looking around to see if anybody's coming at them. COLE Somebody is sending the NNMX a message. But who? COACH I bet its Little Black Book starring Brittany Murphy. COLE Uh yeah. Anyway lets hear word from them and our other sponsors! (Go to break) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break) (We go backstage where Rick Edwards is talking with some other wrestlers when JAE runs up and blasts Rick in the back of the head with a chain covered hand.) J. ARTHUR Do you really think you have enough pull around here to get your way? Your stupid stipulation won’t mean a damn thing when I beat your ass! *JAE pulls Rick back up and slams him face first into the wall before wrapping the chain around his throat and choking him with it. Rick’s face starts to turn different colors as JAE chokes the life out of him.* J. ARTHUR I helped you! I made you into a man instead of some cartoon! I led you to the X Division Title and you thank me by turning on me!? That title is basically mine because without me you never would have gotten near it! I was the one who helped you injure AJ Flaire so you could beat him! I made you twice the man you were before! You owe me that title because you’re just wasting it! *JAE lets go of the choke and Rick gasps for air. JAE goes to strike again, but Parka, Judas, Eddy, and Leah run up and chase him off. Rick then struggles over to the wall and leans against it.* RICK Dammit I’m sick of him always getting the drop on me! Maybe he’s right…maybe I’m not what I used to be. EDDY Nonsense! He’s just trying to get inside your head! He didn’t make you into anything! RICK No, but he made me forget who I am. Come AngleSlam it’s time to change that. It’s time to do something I never thought I’d do again! *We fade out on the confused looks of those around Rick as he pulls himself to his feet.* (Go somewhere else backstage) Stephen Joseph Cappa! The Mad Cappa turns around in a backstage hallway at the sound of his voice. He gulps and tears off running down the hallway away from Stephen Joseph. Stephen runs and pursues, catching up to Cappa slowly. Cappa turns and ducks into a hallway on the right. Our cameraman jostles around trying to keep up with Stephen. Stephen turns into the hallway and WHAM~! BAM~! ANDREW HYLAND appears from nowhere with a steel chair right at SJ's head, knocking him down and out cold. Hyland throws the chair down as Cappa rejoins him. Hyland YOU don't mess with a HERO. Cappa You were right. It did work. Hyland With his ego, you bet. Cappa C'mon, let's go. We got our point across. Hyland Aww Man, I want to take on Inten5e man! Cappa Four on Two? We're smarter than that. At AngleSlam, we've got to be smarter. Oh and Popick. YOU DON'T KNOW ME! ::kick to the stomach of SJ:: (Go to the arena) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 COLE Well...I for one cannot wait for AngleSlam, live on Pay Per View this coming Sunday. It promises to be one hell of a show, topped off by what could be one of the most memorable matches in OAOAST history...with Crystal and Zack Malibu, Submit or Surrender for the World Heavyweight Championship. That's gonna be one hell of a battle. COACH No doubt 'bout it! From what we've seen from Zack in recent weeks, I would not wanna be in Crystal's pretty little shoes. COLE I agree. It seems like Zack Malibu is ADDICTED to being the World Champion, which is bad for anybody who attempts to take it from him... COACH ...what are these people yelling for? COLE What? COACH The people. Yelling. COLE They're just happy to be here, live for HeldDOWN~! And why not? COACH Eh, if you say so. COLE Well, aren't you happy to be here Coach? COACH I'd say it was more 'relieved to have a job'...but that another story for another day. Now, we were talking about Crystal. Let's keep doing that. That's the kind of subject I li... "PIZZA!" COLE Huh? "PIIIZZZAAAAA!!!" COACH Ok, I totally didn't imagine that one. "GEEEEEET YOUR PIIIZZZAAAAA!!!" Suddenly, the reason for the commotion in the arena is revealed...as Leon Rodez emerges behind Coach and Cole at Announce Central, dressed like one of the food vendors that roam the arena. Only, rather than chilli dogs and beer, Rodez seems to be carrying a stack of pizza boxes. RODEZ Heeeey, Mickey! You wan a'pizza? COLE Err...SURE, sure! What have you got? RODEZ Okaaay! I gotta tha pepperoni...I gotta the Margherita...I gotta your Slim Jim special... COLE A what? RODEZ Oh...I ran into Savage on the way here and, well, you know him. He snapped a Slim Jim...onto one of the pizzas. COACH Ugh. RODEZ Yeah. So, eh...you wanna da pizza? COLE Yeah, we'll have a pepperoni cheers. RODEZ Anchovies? COACH Yeah... COLE No... RODEZ ...pineapple? COACH No thanks... COLE Yeah, I'll have pineapple... RODEZ ...riiight. Chilli? COACH Nah, I'm not too bad thanks... COLE AND RODEZ ... COACH ...Oh, right. Yeah, chilli's fine. The Coach likes it spicy, baby! COLE What, uhm, what type of pizzas are they anyway. It's just, my nutritionist is pretty strict on how much fat I can intake at a time. After all, without my looks I'd be nothing. RODEZ ... COLE Leon? RODEZ Oh, sorry, I thought you were kidding. Nah, don't worry about it Mickey. Rest assure, they're all...'Stone baked'. So, it's two pepperonies...one with pineapple and one with anchovies. I'll level with you guys, those both sound pretty disgusting, so... "WOAH WOAH WOAH!" Suddenly Rodez stops and turns towards the aisleway, as do Coach and Cole, as suddenly an angry looking Drek Stone bursts through the curtain and begins to stride down the ramp. STONE Now, I don't know what the hell you think you're doing out here kid! But whatever it is, I don't think I like it! With his striding getting faster and faster, Drek quickly reaches the ring and rolls in...making sure he doesn't crease up his immaculate suit as he does so. Meanwhile Rodez watches on from behind the announce position, glaring at the man who cost him the X-Division Title last week but still managing to smile with half of his mouth, knowing he's pissed Drek off. STONE What is this? Huh!?! Look at you...you look RIDICULOUS! Walking around, selling pizzas. Is that supposed to be funny? Eh!?! Is that supposed to be some sort of 'rib' on me. You think you're funny? Do ya!?! RODEZ ...man, this guy needs to relax... STONE LOOK AT ME WHEN I'M TALKING TO YOU, YOU LITTLE PUNK! And Rodez does just that, with both men locking eyes and glaring angrily at the other. STONE I don't know if you know just who in the hell I am, but judging from your actions I'm guessing that you don't. I'm DREK STONE! And you DON'T mess with me! Get it!?! It's all very well running around trying to embarrass people, making fun of people. But I ain't 'people'. I'm Drek Stone. And you don't make fun of me, you don't disrespect me and you don't disrespect my heritage. Do you hear me!?! Suddenly Rodez places his pizza box collection into Coach's lap, covering his cream pants with grease, before hopping over the barrier to a pop from the crowd! Quickly he takes a microphone from ringside and grabs his boxes back, before walking from around the back of the table and sliding the boxes into the ring. STONE Yeah...yeah that's right, you get in this damn ring! Rolling in, Rodez manages a grin as the crowd cheer for him, before turning back and locking eyes with Stone. STONE Kid...you've either got a lot of balls or not a lot of brains to do what you're doing right now. Either way, I suggest you explain yourself... RODEZ Explain myself!?! Me!?! You know, the irony of that is staggering. Before I explain anything, how about you explain to me and to all of these people just why you screwed me out of the OAOAST X-Division Championship belt! STONE You mean, you don't know? Are you not smart enough to work that out or sumthin'? It's like I just said, nobody messes with me and nobody disrespects me without paying the punishment. You wanna make wise cracks about me? Then you pay the punishment. What, did you think that I was suddenly your buddy? Did you really think that I was out there as a special guest referee to help you win a championship belt, considering the disrespect you paid me after I lost my belt? Ha! If you really thought that, you're stupider than you look. RODEZ Oh believe me, I'm not stupid enough to trust a snake like you. STONE Ooh, I'm a 'snake', huh? Somebody hold me, because that one really hurt. You're PATHETIC Rodez. You... are... path... et... ic! Believe me, I've had stronger, tougher, braver men make wise-cracks at me than you. And they all ended up in the same way...a BAD way! By now, Stone has slowly closed in on Rodez and the two men are nose to nose...or as close as possible, with their slight height difference. STONE Now, I've checked and checked with Northstar...on more than one occassion. Rest assured, I've GOT you ate AngleSlam. Oh yeah. You and me kid, one on one. And rest assured that when I say I've got you...I have got you right where I want you. I have seen more and done more in my career than you will ever hope to do. The way I see it, you're nothing...but a punk kid. Some hotshot nobody. You've got some nice abs, snappy haircut, a way with the ladies...and that makes you think that you can hang with men like myself. Only, you're forgetting that you're not a man. You're a child. In my world, you're below a child. You're a baby in my world kid. What are you...nineteen, twenty... RODEZ Twenty ye... STONE You're twenty. Have you ever smoked a cigar in your life? Ever had a beverage with anything above 0.01% alcohol content? Ever slept with a woman? RODEZ Believe me, I've slept with more woman than you've had hot dinners. Or, should that be...hot pizzas... Suddenly Drek snaps, lunging forward and grabbing Rodez by the jaw and pulling the youngster up close and personal, until they are lierally nose to nose, glaring deep into Rodez's eyes. STONE You just...don't get it...do you. You DON'T want to PISS me OFF! Stone releases his grip on Rodez and pushes him casually away, leaving Rodez to grab his jaw in a mixture of disbelief and anger. "KICK HIS ASS!" *CLAPCLAP!* "KICK HIS ASS RO - DEZ! KICK HIS ASS!" *CLAPCLAP!* The crowd start chanting, imploring Rodez to retaliate. But for some reason, Leon simply turns back to Stone and grins at him. STONE Kid...rest assured, you have never been in the ring with a man like me. Sure, you've faced the Zack Malibus, Calvin Szechsteins and Chris Brytes of this world. But you've never faced anyone like me. I know enough about you to know you're a 'fun' type of guy. You like to have fun. Got a lot of youthful exuberance. Your efforts go into pleasing these fans. Me? Well, I'm totally different. See...I'm not a nice guy. ESPECIALLY when people make me angry. Where as you enjoy pleasing people, I enjoy hurting people. And at AngleSlam, I'm really going to enjoy hurting you. RODEZ Well, that's all great Drek. Real great. But, what happens if you lose exactly? That'd be...what, three big events in a row that your ass has been beaten? I'm guessing The Don wouldn't like that... Drek starts to move forward towards Rodez, but he backs off enough steps to stay out of his way. RODEZ Woah woah, easy there Drek. Easy. Man, you're pretty tetchy for an Italian. I thought you guys were supposed to be all chilled out, relaxed. STONE That's what you get for basing opinions off of children's television and dumb sitcoms. RODEZ Oh, well, at least you have a sense of humour. So, maybe we can...forgive and forget? I mean, I was only ribbing you. That quip about 'The Don' and the whole pizza thing. I was only joking around. Come on, you really think I'd be trying to piss you off? Why? Look, this has got all out of hand. I'm looking forward to wrestling you at Angle Slam don't get me wrong, but I'm not trying to make a fool out of you. Infact... Rodez turns, rather cautiously, his back to Stone and grabs the stack of pizza boxes from across the ring. Fuming, Drek tries to calm himself down, thinking that his words have gotten to Rodez, as the New Age Love Machine walks back over. RODEZ ...there's no pizza in the boxes. COACH What? I was looking forward to that. RODEZ But, there is something in there for you that I kinda wanted to give you. It's only in a pizza box so I could get you out here...to give you it. STONE What is it? Dead fish? Plate of spaghetti? Picture of Tony Soprano? What are you planning to embarass me with this time. RODEZ Look, Drek, I don't NEED to embarass you... Rodez mouths the words trust me, but Drek obviously doesn't. All the same, he seems to want this whole incident over and done with, so grabs the top of the pizza and pulls it open... *PHHHHFF!* ...AND GETS SPRAYED IN THE EYES BY A SHOT OF WHITE POWDER! "YEEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" COACH What the hell was that!?! COLE That...that was powder! The pizza box was booby trapped! It was booby trapped! Never in all my years of commentating on wrestling have I seen an inanimate object be booby trapped! RODEZ See! I don't NEED to embarass you. You're more than capable of doing that yourself! Suddenly Rodez throws the boxes to his side, dropping the microphone as he does and measuring Stone, who is staggering around dis-orientated with his hands clasped over his eyes. Stumbling around, Drek gets nailed with a boot to the gut and has his arms double-underhooked. The grin has disappeared from Rodez's face now, as he grunts in anger and lifts Stone up in the air, before sitting out with a Tiger Driver on Stone! COLE Tiger Driver! Stone is down! COACH This is horrible! With Stone laid out, Rodez rolls to his feet and raises his arms in the air, all the while glaring down at Stone...who is out cold, his face covered in the white powder. Finally, a smile re-emerges on Leon's face, as he kneels down next to Stone and slaps him in the face to wake him up, before hovering over him and chuckling... "See ya Sunday, paizan!" ...and then quickly rolling out of the ring, before the temporarily blinded Stone swings with a weak punch which hits nothing but thin air! "You Sexy Thing" hits, as Rodez strolls smugly up the ramp. Meanwhile, Stone starts to claw at his eyes, before letting out a cry of anger at what just happened. COLE I think the anté has been raised ahead of AngleSlam, as far as Drek Stone and Leon Rodez are concerned. This one is more than about retribution now...this is about saving face! This is personal now! COACH Ya think? Drek Stone has been humiliated in front of thousands of people by that damn kid Rodez, he's been left laying in the ring...and I NEVER got my pizza! COLE Don't worry, I'm got the number for Domino's. COACH Ah, cool...do they have fishsticks? COLE IT'S NOT RED LOBSTER!!! YOU SAID YOU WANTED PIZZA NOT FISHSTICKS! HOW CAN I DEAL WITH YOU IF YOU'RE ALWAYS CHANGING YOUR MIND! COACH Woah, dude. Uh, let's take a break! (Yes, let's.) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from our break) The words "EARLIER TONIGHT" scroll across the screen as we cut to footage from the end of the Bryte/Gunn match. COLE Fans, welcome back to HeldDOWN, and I'm still in shock at what we saw earlier on! Chris Bryte was taking on Tommy Gunn...the older brother of the late "J-Dogg" Johnny Gunn, who was killed by The Hand last month in a match! Gunn lost that match via disqualification for using a chair, but that's not the story, because look at what this piece of garbage did! Tommy Gunn on the middle rope going for a moonsault...Kevin Taylor sprays him in the eyes with mace, and look at this! Bryte hooks his arms, Taylor pulls up the mats at ringside, and Bryte...he gave Tommy Gunn the Bryte Side...that vertebreaker off the apron and onto the exposed concrete, and that was totally uncalled for, Coach! Totally uncalled for! COACH Yeah, and as you can guess, here's how Tommy Gunn ended up! The HeldDOWN logo scrolls the screen and we cut to later footage of him being loaded into an ambulance. COLE There you see him...Tommy Gunn getting carted off the hospital! COACH Damn shame! COLE Exactly. From my notes here, it appears that Tommy has actually had a history of neck injuries...I just hope...that...that was disgusting! The logo scrolls the screen once again we cut back to the interview area where we see Kevin Yancy Taylor standing alongside Bryte; both have smiles etched on their faces. TAYLOR Cheer up, Michael Cole! Turn that frown upside down, for it is I...KEVIN YANCY TAYLOR...back once again to give you a KYT exclusive the the one-and-only Chris Bryte! Now Chris, Cole and Coach want to know why! Why did you do what you did out there?! How could you "maliciously" injure another human being the way that you did to poor, poor Tommy Gunn! BRYTE Why'd I do it, Uncle Kev? Well it's as simple as this: the OAOAST has backed me into a corner! They've placed my back up against the wall by putting me in this cage match with Panther! It's totally unfair, and unc, you and I both know that it's nothing more than a blatant attempt by the powers that be to try and take me out and end my career! TAYLOR Absolutely! Word around the locker room is that all the boys in the back agree! BRYTE Yeah, well pay attention, Watts, and you Panther, you had certainly better pay attention to what happened to Tommy Gunn tonight, because it's a prime example of what happens when you back Chris Bryte into a corner! The two of you think you've really pulled something! (voice cracks) Panther, y-y-you think you've got me right where you want me, b-b-BUT YOU'RE WRONG! And I guarantee you that you'll be in for a rude awakening this Sunday night! I'm gonna step into that cage with you, Panther, and I am gonna do once and for all what Bill Watts and the OAOAST are too afraid to do, what you were too stupid to do, and that's end your worthless, pathetic career, Panther! You sonuvabitch! YOU'VE PUSHED ME TO THIS!!!! I didn't wanna do it, BUT YOU'RE GONNA MAKE ME DO IT, PANTHER! And I'm gonna make sure that you don't leave that cage walking! I promise it, Panther! I guarantee it! This Sunday Night, your career--your life--IT WILL END AT ANGLESLAM!!!!!!!! Bryte's breathing deep, rapid breaths into the camera as Kevin smiley nonchalantly. TAYLOR Cole...Coach...back to you! Cameras cut out to ringside, where we see IRS headed into the ring, wearing glasses and with a silver briefcase in his right hand. COLE Fans, there you see IRS headed into the ring, about to go 1-on-1 with Panther. And fans, this isn't the first time that these two were set to meet. They were originally supposed to square off on April 15th... COACH Tax day! That's brilliant! COLE Yeah, but unfortunately, due to an attack on Tina by who we now know was The Hand, Panther didn't show up, and the match was postponed. They were then scheduled to meet the next week on HeldDOWN, but THAT didn't happen due to some exclusive footage that we're about to show you right now... The word "EXCLUSIVE" appears in the upper left hand corner as we cut to footage of a bloodied IRS hanging by his tie from a running ceiling fan. The fans inside the arena laugh as IRS's body goes around and around. Interestingly enough, there's a big bloody handprint on the back of his shirt. COLE There you see it. Never-before-seen footage of what took place backstage at the April 22nd HeldDOWN~! IRS was taken out by an unknown assailant, and judging from the looks of things, I think I've got a pretty good idea of who was behind that attack. COACH Yeah. The Hand sure did get around back then, didn't he? COLE Yeah. IRS clearly in no shape to compete that night, but he's here tonight, and after all this time, we're finally gonna be able to have this match! THE LOGO~! scrolls the screen once more and we're right back to live action as Buffer and IRS stand in the ring. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce to you, hailing from Washington, D.C....weighing in tonight at Two-hundred and Fifty-Five Pounds...here is IRWIN R. SCHYSTER...otherwise known as I...R...S!!!!!! The crowd boos in the background as Schyster snatches the mic from Buffer. IRS I'd like for all the tax cheats in the house tonight to pay close attention tonight as I face the biggest tax cheat of them all: Panther! (crowd pops) See Panther, you have tried to prolong our meeting, but you can only evade your taxes for so long. Tonight, my friend, you're gonna find out the hard way that no matter who you are or how hard you try, sooner or later, EVERYBODY has to pay the Tax man! The crowd boos as IRS hands the mic back to Buffer, then begin to cheer as "State Prop (You Know Us)" hits the PA system. The arena fades to black, and after approximately 5 seconds... *BOOOOOOOM~!* ...a HUUUUUUUUGE pyro blast explodes on stage. Flashing red and white spotlights swarm the arena, roaming the crowd momentarily before converging on stage, where Panther appears through a thick cloud of smoke. The fans cheer wildly as Panther strolls to the edge of the stage, awaiting the cue in his music. Then, as the horns begin to blare over the PA system, Panther raises his arms high above his head--holding the pose for a moment as white spotlights illuminate the set behind him--then snaps them down by his sides. Panther flashes a smile into the crowd before heading down the ramp to ringside. BUFFER His opponent: hailing from Philadelphia, PA and weighing in tonight at 194 pounds...he is known around the world as the Champion of Champions...PAAAAAAANTHEEEEEERRRR!!!!!! The crowd gives a huge pop at the mention of Panther's name. Panther continues down to ringside, where he takes a vertical leap onto the apron, pauses for a moment to look into the crowd, then steps into the ring. He brushes both Buffer and the official aside as he walks out to the center of the ring, and as the horns begin to blare once again, Panther takes stance in front of the main camera. On cue, the arena goes black, with bright white spotlights roaming the crowd to the beat of the music...getting brighter...and brighter...and brighter...until... ..IRS ATTACKS PANTHER FROM BEHIND WITH THE BRIEFCASE!!!!!! The crowd boos wildly in the background as the lights return to normal, the music stops abruptly, and Schyster begins putting the boots to Panther. *DING DING DING* COLE Schyster attacking Panther during his entrance! DAMN HIM! DAMN HIS SOUL! COACH Geez, Mikey! Is this really that big of a deal to be damning someone's soul over? COLE YES! COACH Ok. Just making sure! CRUCIFY THAT BITCH! COLE Stop it! The ref removes the briefcase from the ring as Schyster lifts Panther back to his feet, sending him back into the ropes with a hard knife edge chop. A second one, followed up by a right hand. Irish whip by IRS sends Panther into a far side, but Panther baseball slides through his legs coming off. Double leg takedown puts IRS flat on his face, at which point Panther returns to his feet, traps IRS's head between his left and right foot, then twists off, wrenching his neck in the process. Clutching at his neck, Schyster crawls toward the ropes, but before he can reach them, Panther grabs him from behind, nails him with one, two, three right hands to the temple before wrapping his arms around his head and wrenching his neck once again. IRS ends up landing throat-first across the top rope, at which point, Panther comes up from behind and drives his right knee into the back of his neck, choking him. REF C'mon, Panther, break it up! 1...2...3... Schyster's eyes look ready to bulge out of the sockets as Panther releases on 3. Panther then grabs IRS by the suspenders and yanks him up into a side headlock. Panther wrenches back as hard as he can on Schyster's neck, but IRS manages to drive him back into the ropes, where he drives two forearm shots into his ribs before sending him into the far side. IRS drops down as Panther rebounds, and Panther goes up and over to the other side. IRS returns to his feet, and as Panther comes off, he catches him by the back of the head and uses him momentum to send him sailing over the top rope. IRS raises his arms into the air to celebrate, not realizing that Panther held on! COLE Panther managing to grab that top rope on the way over! COACH IRS doesn't see him. IRS jaw jacks with a few fans in the front row as behind him, Panther propels himself to the rope. The crowd comes to its feet in the background, and when IRS turns around, Panther catches him square on the jaw with a missile dropkick that sends him rolling through the ropes and to the outside. The crowd pops once more in the background and chants of "PANTHER" echo throughout the arena. COLE Things not going IRS's way here in the early going as these fans once again rally behind the Champ of Champs! Schyster slaps the ringside mats with frustration as he pulls himself back to his feet. Making sure to keep an eye on him from the ring, Panther once again takes stance in front of the main camera, snaps his right fist into the air and... *BOOOOOOOOOOOOM~!* ...pyro explodes from all four ringposts. Panther then hits off the far ropes, dashes across the ring and leaps to the outside, catching a startled Schyster with a perfectly executed corkscrew plancha! Panther fires of rapid-fire right hands to the head before popping back to his feet and playing to the crowd, getting another strong reaction! Panther then lifts IRS back to his feet and buries a right knee into his gut before sending him HARD into the steel barricade with an Irish whip; Schyster lets loose a loud scream as his back hits off the steel. Panther approaches him and reaches for his hair, looking to pull him off the guardrail, but catches a thumb to the eye for his troubles. IRS follows up with a knee to the gut and a clubbing forearm to the back before grabbing Panther and eying the guardrail himself. COACH Looks like this time Panther's gonna get a little taste of the steel. With a handful of hair, IRS walks Panther over to the guardrail and tries to slam him into it, but Panther manages to get a hand up to block it. Panther doubles him over with two elbows to the gut, then grabs him by the hair and tries to slam him into the guardrail--BUT NO! He gets his hand up to block it as well. Schyster fires off an elbow to Panther's gut, then another HARD elbow to the jaw, causing him to stagger backwards. Looking to capitalize, IRS charges Panther with an attempted clothesline, but Panther manages to duck underneath, tuck his head under Schyster's left armpit and drop him crotch-first across the guardrail. IRS lets out a loud scream as he clutches the injured area. COLE That'll ruin the tax man's plans for later in the evening, I assure you. COACH Damn skippy, hippy! With IRS still straddling the guardrail, Panther RIPS into him with a hard knife edge chop to the chest. A second one sends him tumbling back down to the mats at ringside. Panther then reaches down and brings him back to his feet by his hair. He nails him with another chop, then turns to the ringpost with evil intentions. COACH Uh oh! COLE This won't bode well for IRS! Panther grabs him by the hair once again, and with a full head of steam, he charges toward the ringpost and-- *THUD* --DAMN NEAR CAVES HIS SKULL IN by slamming him headfirst into the post. The impact is actually enough to get a "Holy shit" chant out of the fans at ringside. COACH Ouch! The dazed tax man slides into the ring, hoping to distance himself from Panther, but to no avail as the Champ of Champs follows him in and pulls him back grabs him by his necktie! The crowd begins to cheer as Panther yanks him back to his feet. COACH Is this legal? COLE Who cares?! The man has no business wearing a tie in there! With the tie in hand, Panther darts towards the ropes and leaps over to the outside, in the process, snapping Schyster's throat across the top rope. IRS falls parallel to the ropes, at which point, Panther hops back into the apron and scours the arena, bringing the crowd back to its feet. With IRS still down, he yanks back on the top rope and propels himself into the ring with a hilo, landing right on IRS's sternum. He makes the cover...1...2...IRS kicks out at 2! COLE Panther's solidly in control of this one. COACH Yeah. And I don't wanna say I'm surprised, but it does catch me off guard here. I mean...with everything that's been going on lately...with Bryte, with the attack on he and Tina last week, I'd have thought that Panther would be overlooking IRS here. I'd think that Panther's mind would be focused more on this Sunday and the cage match with Bryte than this match right here. COLE Oh, without a doubt, that match is weighing heavily on Panther's mind, but don't expect Panther to overlook anybody! He brings his all in each and every match that he's in, and he could be getting set to finish this thing right here. Panther hooks Irwin for what looks to be a T-Bone suplex, but two elbows to the side of the head change his plans. Panther releases the grip, and IRS tries to capitalize with a clothesline but Panther ducks under, going behind his opponent and locking on a full nelson. The crowd pops in anticipation for a Dragon suplex, but IRS sets himself low in order to prevent the move. Panther struggles to get him up for it, but his larger, stronger opponent manages to break the full nelson and bring him over with a snap mare to the canvas. Schyster then hits off the ropes and misses with a snapping elbow coming off. Panther right back to his feet, and he grabs the injured arm, yanking on it twice before stepping over and bringing him down to the mat with La Majistral. The referee slides in position for the count... 1.. 2.. NO! Kickout after two, and both men get right back to there feet, where IRS mows Panther down with a hard clothesline. The fans boo as Irwin pauses for a moment, trying to shake the effects of Panther's earlier assault. He then moves in and catches Panther with a hard stomp to the back of the head. Another one. He applies a front facelock and uses it to drag Panther back to his feet, where he brings him over with a snap suplex. Schyster floats into the cover...1...2...NO! Panther raises the right shoulder after two. IRS then brings Panther back to his feet, scoops him up and drops him in a front backbreaker. IRS with another lateral press for 1...2...NO! Panther raises the shoulder once again. IRS lifts Panther up into a seated position, then drives his knee into the small of his back. He does it a second time. He then lifts Panther back to his feet and hooks him in an abdominal stretch. Panther screams in pain as IRS cinches back on the hold. COLE IRS seems to be working over the back here. COACH Yeah. This move right here also applies pressure to the chest and midsection as well, and remember that those areas were injured not too long ago by The Hand! I know for a fact that Panther has yet to fully recover from that injury from The Hand. The referee's right up in Panther's face to see if he can continue. With the ref out of position, IRS reaches back and grabs the top rope for added leverage. Panther screams and begins flailing his free hand, prompting the ref to move around and check the ropes. The top rope is shaking, but IRS has released his grip. The crowd boos as Schyster looks around as if he's done nothing wrong. When the ref heads back over to check on Panther, IRS again grabs the top rope for leverage. Again, Panther begins to scream, but again, IRS releases his grip when the suspicious ref moves around to check. The crowd begins chanting "IIIIRRRRRWIIIIIIIIN! IIIIIIIIIRRRRWIIIIIIIN!" in a taunting manner, bringng anger to his face. The ref then moves back into position to check on Panther. Irwin grabs the top rope once again, but this time, the ref slips around from the opposite side and catches him red handed. The ref kicks his hand off the top rope--drawing a huge pop from the crowd--and Panther manages to break the hold with a hip toss. With Irwin flat on his back in the center of the ring, Panther runs to the ropes and comes off with a big splash... ...but Irwin raises the knees! Panther gets back to his feet as quickly as he can--clutching his ribs all the way--but when he reaches the feet, Irwin mows him back down with a flying clothesline! He covers Panther and hooks the leg... 1... 2... THR--NO! Panther gets the shoulder up after 2! COACH Man! He almost got him with that clothesline, Mikey! COLE Panther's in trouble here, and this is not good going into Angleslam this Sunday night. Panther needs all the momentum he can get when he steps into that cage with Chris Bryte. IRS lifts Panther back up by his right arm, and catches him with a boot to the midsection. He then scoops him up and drops him down with a pendulum backbreaker. He then holds his arms up, drawing the ire of the capacity crowd. COLE These fans do not like IRS! IRS lifts Panther back to his feet once more and scoops him up onto his shoulders and into Samoan Drop position . COACH Uh oh! COLE This is what he calls the Write Off! If he hits thit, that'll be all she wrote for Panther. Schyster parades Panther around the ring before performaing the move, but before he has a chance to drop him, Panther shifts his weight forward, managing to slip off of his shoulders and catch him in a front chancery. IRS combats the move, nailing Panther with two forearms to the ribs to loosen his grip. He then tries to lift Panther up one more time, but Panther goes over his back and lands on his feet behind him, grabbing a rear waistlock upon landing. IRS tries to catch Panther with a couple of reverse elbows, but Panther ducks under, and his IRS's momentum turns him around, allowing Panther to hook him and take him over with a T-Bone suplex! Schyster hits his head hard upon hitting the canvas, and groggily comes back to his feet, only to get blasted with a HARD superkick for his troubles. The crowd cheers as Panther begins to pace the ring back and forth, intensity building in his eyes by the second. COACH Hey, Cole, you know what I think? COLE What? COACH I think that Panther's getting FIRED UP, DAMN IT! Yes indeed! He turns back to IRS and motions for him to "get up", and when he does, Panther charges him and blasts him with a hard right hand. A second sends him staggering back to the buckle, where Panther begins to unload on him. Lefts, rights, boots, and chops--everything he can muster. He then grabs him by the right arm and whips him across the ring, causing him to hit HARD off the opposite buckle. IRS staggers out to the center of the ring, clutching his lower back, at which point, Panther slips behind him, grabs a rear waistlock and takes him over with a tremendous German! He pops back to his feet and flashes an intense glare into the camera before turning back to IRS, lifting him up and folding him up with a second German. Panther pops back to his feet and shoots another glare into the crowd, then turns back to the fallen tax man and begins imploring him to get back to his feet...almost begging him. COLE This is trademark Panther, fans! He's got IRS on the run. IRS slowly pulls himself to a knee, then back to a standing position, at which point, Panther slips in from behind and grabs another waistlock--NO! Schyster with a reverse elbow breaks his grip. Panther doesn't relent, however, and applies another rear waistlock. IRS begins firing more reverse elbows, but Panther's set too low and he can't connect. Out of desperation, he grabs hold of the top rope, clutching it with both hands as Panther tries as best he can to pull him away. "NO!!!! NO!!!," yells Schyster as he begins to lose his grip on the top rope, and the crowd is almost at a fever pitch as Panther yanks him into the air and stacks him with a third German! This time he holds the bridge... 1... 2... THR--NO!!!!!! COLE Almost!!!!!! Almost! COACH Man! I think that may have been the first time I've seen Panther actually get that third German. COLE He got it, alright! And he damn near folded IRS up like an accordion in the process! Looking to finish things off, Panther makes a throat-slitting gesture as he brings IRS back to his feet, but the wiley tax man grabs a hold of the front of his jersey, and with a leverage move, sends Panther sailing through the ropes and to the outside. Panther's not hurt by the move, and quickly returns to his feet and heads back into the ring. As he's stepping through the ropes, though, IRS pounces on him, catching him with an elbow right between the shoulder blades. He then yanks Panther out to the center of the ring and pulls him into a standing headscissors. COLE What's this? COACH Piledriver?! IRS swipes his hands to signify the end as he wraps his arms around Panther's waist and lifts him up onto his shoulders for a powerbomb. He's unable to hold him, however, and Panther's momentum allows him to go over his back and take him down sunset flip style. He doesn't go for the pin, though, and instead, he rolls IRS back to his feet and into a standing headscissors of his own! The crowd comes to its feet. COACH Uh oh! COLE He's going for Da Bomb! He's going for it! IRS desperately tries to pull away, but Panther holds on, pounding him with forearm after forearm to the small of his back before wrapping his arms around his waist, lifting him high into the air and dumping him HARD onto the back of his head and neck with Da Bomb. Panther falls into the cover and hooks the leg and the referee slides into position to count... CROWD 1...2...3!!!!!!! *DING DING DING* **Cue "State Prop (You Know Us)" BUFFER Here is your winner...PAAAAAAAAAAANTHEEEEERRRRRRR!!!!!!!! COLE What a hard fought win that was for Panther! COACH Yeah. Taxy put up a good fight, but in the end, they don't get up from Da Bomb! COLE Absolutely right. Panther picks up the victory and gains some ever-important momentum going into Angleslam, where he does battle with his arch-rival Chris Bryte in that Steel Cage match. Fans...take another look at how this one went down. The HeldDOWN logo scrolls the screen again as we cut to a slow-motion replay of Panther's powerbomb counter into his own...Da Bomb. When the replay ends, officials are helping IRS back to the locker room, and Jackie Gayda is in the ring alongside Panther. JACKIE Alright, fans, I am standing in the ring with the man who is gonna KICK CHRIS BRYTE'S ASS this Sunday night on pay-per-view! (crowd pops) Panther, that was a great victory for you against IRS, and now the time is upon us! You finally get your chance to get Chris Bryte 1-on-1! It'll be a steel cage match! No one will be able to get in, and Chris Bryte won't be able to get out! Now we saw and heard from Chris earlier on, now Panther what are your thoughts going into Angleslam? PANTHER First of all Jackie, make no mistake about it: I saw Chris Bryte out here earlier tonight, and I heard what he had to say. He comes out here and he thinks that because he can talk in some Dr. Claw-sounding smoker's voice that I'm supposed to be intimidated by him, and frankly, I think it's pathetic and it just goes to show that what I've been saying about him all along is, indeed, THE FUCKING TRUTH, and that's that Chris Bryte is, was, and will always be the biggest joke walking the face of this earth. (crowd pops) He comes out here tonight trying to act like a tough guy, when all I've heard from him was a whole bunch of crying! He cries about a conspiracy! Cries about how he's been backed into a corner! Cries about how he's been pushed too far, well Bryte man, you'd better get used to crying because you're damn sure gonna be doing a lot of it when I get you in that cage Sunday night! Until then, you can say what you wanna say and do whatever you wanna do, it won't change the fact that come Angleslam, Chris Bryte's ass belongs to me, and I'm gonna do what I've wanted to do since day 1, and that's wipe you off this planet once and for all. JACKIE Now, Panther...I must ask you, are you even in the least bit worried about what Bryte'll do to survive against you. I mean, you saw what he did to Tommy Gunn earlier on...with the Bryte Side off the apron. Bryte's been known to stoop pretty low when his back's against the wall. PANTHER Jackie, I'm not surprised by anything Chris Bryte does...not anymore. See, all these months of dealing with Bryte have shown me exactly what type of man I'm dealing with. This guy's the lowest form of scum ever to walk the face of the earth. It's like you said, the man'll stoop to the lowest depths he can stoop to in order to survive, and the only reason he's been able to beat me in the past is because I've sat back and tried to do the right thing! While he's been playing dirty, I've been running around here playing Mr. Nice Guy. Well fans, I want each and every last one of you to take a good look, because from here on in, the "nice guy" Panther is dead! (crowd pops) Chris Bryte! For months you've been asking the question! Time after time, you've come out here and asked me to bring back the OLD Panther! Well damn it, Sunday night, you're gonna get all of the OLD Panther you can handle, and then some! For every depth you stoop to, Bryte, I guarantee you that I'll stoop lower! For every dirty trick you try to pull, I'll pull two! Bryte, I will stop at NOTHING, absolutely NOTHING when it comes to making you and Kevin Taylor pay! Pay for everything you've done to me! Everything you've done to Tina! For all the pain you've caused J-Dogg...a guy I've known since the day I broke into this business. A guy I've traveled with...someone I've wrestled night in and night out, and despite our differences over the years, he's someone I had the utmost respect for! Bryte...you're gonna pay for what you did to him! I swear on my life that I'm gonna make you pay for it!!!! Panther lowers his head for a moment and takes a deep long breath. He then looks up at the camera with fury and intensity in his eyes. PANTHER Once again, NOTHING is gonna stop me, Bryte, from taking you out in that cage! I don't care what you try to do, I don't care what I have to do, but in the end, you're gonna get what's coming to you, Bryte, and whether you like it, or whether Taylor likes it, it really doesn't matter, because in the end--now more than ever--there's no right way, there's no wrong way, there's only the Panther's way! And Bryte man...you had damn sure better believe that there that there can't AND WON'T be any other way!!!!! JACKIE Let's here it for Panther! "State Prop (You Know Us)" starts up over the PA system once again as Panther raises his right fist into the air and heads over to the ropes. COLE Well fans, he looks ready, and he certainly sounds ready! What a war it's gonna be this Sunday night at Angleslam when Panther faces Chris Bryte! COACH I can't wait! The fans a giving Panther a huge ovation as he steps out onto the apron with intensity still on his face. He then hops from the apron... ...AND GOES DOWN CLUTCHING HIS KNEE!!!!!! COACH What?! COLE Oh no! Miss Jackie and the referee quickly rush out to the floor to check on Panther, who's screaming in pain as he holds his right knee. After conferring with Panther for a moment, the referee looks towards the locker room and holds up an "X" symbol. Panther's music stops abruptly as officials rush out to the locker room to come to his aid. COLE Oh no! COACH Panther may have just hurt that knee. COLE This is not good! This is not good going into Angleslam! Panther continues to scream and clutch at his knee as we fade to commercial. (Go to break) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break. Feeling good. Feeling great. How are you? You...you..you) Inside the dressing room of Black T, Jesse "The Body" Ventura sits on the couch while Dan Black & T-Bod, dressed in tailor-made suits, relax on the zebra-patterened sofa, resting their legs on top of a coffee table. Jivin' J.R. sits on the other side of the room, watching "American Pie" on DVD, eating a box of jelly donuts. JESSE Welcome back, my uninvited guests, to HeldDown! Jesse "The Body" with the new HIYAH tag team champions Black T, along with the Farmer of Champions, Jivin' J.R. I'm so happy to see you with a belt again T-Bod. I didn't know if I wanted to live in a world full of posers, phonies, and pure wannabes, but I'm glad to see a group finally emerge who can set the record straight. So to all those inferior tag teams, recognize, you hear. Can you say HIYAH & OAOAST tag team champions after this Sunday night, huh? All four men break out in uncontrollable laughter. T-BOD I couldn't say it better myself, Jess. How sweet it is to be wearing gold around these sexy waists again. JESSE Oh, how sexy they are indeed. You're the only man I let my wife fantasize about. Hell, I want you to take my daughter to the prom. The world needs more gentlemen like you and your fellow amigos. T-BOD Thank you so very much, "Body", that means a lot coming off the toughest match in our careers. Some people are going to say the only reason we stand before you HIYAH tag team champions is because of Hell's Hitmen. Well, we all know Hell's Hitmen can't work, and we could of beaten the AABs anyway, we just happened to make their pain short and sweet. JESSE I know you two are looking forward to traveling to Japan; the Geisha Girls, the culture, the fact Asian women love sex. DAN Now, now, Mr. Ventura, Black T do not believe in stereotypes. But Japan is a huge market for our good friends, the greatest rock 'n' wrestling band of all time, The Saints. Who Black T wish the best of luck to in their upcoming "Almost Famous" match against Chicks Over Dicks at the third AngleSlam. T-BOD Lemme tell Anne Heche & Chastity something: When Synth & Logan beat you -- but not to the point where they disfigure your face because that's what they'll be looking at when they're on top -- you'll wish you'd never sworn off the dick because you're gonna find out it feels a whole helluva better taking it up the ass with a real 8" than a rubber one. Haha! I'd also like to wish my good, close personal friend President George W. Bush the best of luck in his re-election. W, sorry I won't be able to make it to NYC for your big speech, but call me and we'll set up an old-fashion Texas B-B-Q at 1600 in January '05. JESSE Lucky he ain't runnin' against me. Okay. People have been tellin' me to ask this question: Last week on HeldDown, you guys got involved in the NNMX-GPX match. DAN Sir, it wasn't our choice to get involved. Me & Mr. T were celebrating his birthday, along with Mr. Jive and Mr. T's cousin Teddy Moneymaker, and decided to attend the show as fans after we left our security passes in the Hilton. (Looking over to T-Bod) Well, we were both in a Hilton while Mr. Jive was in her little rodent called a dog. Then Scotty Static tried to assault us. The videotape shows he jumped over the guardrail and attacked. Like I said, since we were enjoying the show as fans, we thought it was best to control our rage and simply let that imbecile go free. But as Scotty was about to enter the ring, he insulted Jivin' J.R.'s dog... J.R. MY WIFE! MY WIFE! MY WIFE! The camera focuses on Jivin' J.R. who is thrusting forward, the donut he had earlier being used in a matter it wasn't attended for. DAN (turns off TV; J.R. begins crying) Shh. Shh. There, there, you loveable doughboy. You can watch it again after we're done with this interview. Remember we told you not to do that in public. T-BOD I guess TV can be a negative influence. DAN As I was saying, we couldn't let that slide. Scotty took the wine out of T-Bod's hands and pointed at us. Luckily for us, Jesus loves Black T and striked vengeance upon him, shattering the bottle over his head. It was an act of God. J.R. Praise Jeebus! All hail Jeebus. T-BOD Ashame all that good wine went to waste. DAN On the contrary, mother said it's nice to share. Much like Scotty & Johnny share their mothers. Once again everybody cracks up. Two men barge through the dressing room, clotheslining Black T over the sofa, tipping it over in the process. It's THE GLOBAL PARTY XCHANGE~! GPX hammer Black T with punches while Jivin' J.R. hides in the corner. Jesse also hides...behind the mass of Jivin' J.R., then quietly sneaks out. Shaken, but not stirred, Dan uses the bathroom's doorknob to pull himself up. Scotty whips T-Bod into Dan, sending them crashing through the bathroom door. Scotty BREAKS A COFFEE CUP over T-Bod's head. Jivin' J.R. sneaks up behind Scotty with his deadly FLY SWATTER! WHAP! Unfazed Scotty cooly turns around, smirking at Mr. Jive. J.R. begins backing down, asking Scotty if they're cool. When Static continues his march towards Jivin' J.R., he attempts to flee, but the pigley sumbitch is caught from behind. Scotty spins J.R. around and pops him in the kisser. The camera zooms inside the bathroom where Dan hits a low blow on Johnny, then uses his shorts to throw him against the wall. Black T try to STICK JOHNNY'S HEAD INTO THE TOILET but J.J. fights it off. Out of nowhere Scotty nails Black T from behind with a clothesline. Dan quickly gets up and charges Scotty who hip tosses him back into the dressing room, his ankles scraping against the top of the bathroom door, landing inches away from the sofa. Scotty & Johnny scoope T-Bod up for a double-bodyslam...or do they? No! GPX drop T-Bod HEAD FIRST INTO THE TOILET... FLUSH~! GPX laugh as T-Bod smacks the sides of the toilet with his hands. Suddenly the room becomes covered in white foam. Black nails Scotty, covered in foam, on the shoulder with a FIRE EXTINGUISHER. Dan follows that up by jamming the fire extinguisher into Johnny's gut, then across his back. DAN J.R.? J.R.? J.R. (holding his jaw) What? DAN Hold him up. J.R. I don't think that's a good idea. Don't you know that never works? DAN I said hold him up! Jivin' J.R. holds Johnny up and closes his eyes. BOOM! Down goes J.R.! Down goes J.R.! Down goes J.R.! "Damn, he was right," Black mumbles before getting SPEARED over the tipped sofa by Johnny. J.J. gets up, pumping his fist in excitement, he turns around...RUNNING CLOTHESLINE BY T-BOD. T-Bod, his hair dripping wet, hurdled over the sofa and caught Jackson with a clothesline. Scotty comes up from behind with a double-axehandle. He clubbers T-Bod with forearm shots but it hardly has any effects on the 6'6, 292 pounder. T-Bod blocks a kick, spins Scotty around and follows that up with a clothesline...a missed clothesline. T-Bod staggers around momentarily. BICYLCE KICK drops T-Bod across the coffee table. You know what's coming up next. Scotty uses the sofa as a springboard to hit a MOONSAULT, breaking the table! Scotty slowly gets up...WHAM!...crashes into the camera, nearly landing outside the dressing room only to smack his upper and lower body across the doorway, after receiving a CHAIR SHOT from Dan Black. Black repeatedly drives the point of the chair on Scotty's ribcage. It's no secret he's still recovering from broken ribs. T-Bod slouches over, clearly exhausted from the brawl. Johnny leapfrogs over him and nails Dan with a DROPKICK, sending him stumbling over Scotty, outside to the hallway. Johnny "Jam" hops over his partner and jumps on Dan, pounding him with all his might. BAM! A black dress shoe smacks J.J. on the side of his face. Stiff kick from T-Bod. OAOAST officials finally appear to break up this brawl, to a chant of "Let them fight! Let them fight! Let them fight!" Terry Taylor holds T-Bod back but it doesn't stop Scotty from jumping over a number of officials, and landing on top of T-Bod with a cross bodyblock. Officials try to pry Scotty off T-Bod who's getting pounded with uncontrollable rights and lefts. Wielding a chair, Dan Black shoves numberous officials as he nears Scotty. BOOM! Black slams Static's head into the floor. Dan tells T-Bod to lift up Scotty, while he places the steel chair behind him. They're going to SPIKE PILEDRIVER Scotty onto the chair! CRACK! Johnny "Jam" Jackson breaks a DVD PLAYER over Dan's back. Black drops to his knees then the floor. Jackson drives the remaining portion of the DVD player between Scotty's leg, nailing T-Bod in the face, allowing Scotty to use his flexibility to counter the piledriver into a HURRICARANA on the steel chair. GPX scoope T-Bod on their shoulders and ram him through THE CATERING ROOM door. GPX just used T-Bod as a human battery ram. The folks inside catering scatter around the room, screaming and yelling. "We come in peace," Scotty tells the employees. "We also come with trash," qulps Johnny as they slide T-Bod on a table full of food. T-Bod pulls himself up, strings of spaghetti on his head. "How you feeling? (Hot Hot Hot) How you feeling? (Hot Hot Hot)" sings Johnny, while Scotty pours a bucket of sauce on T-Bod's head, sending the big man screaming in pain due to its heat. Dan Black comes running into the frame with a table. POW! GPX go down. Black sets up the table and places Scotty on it, holding him down. T-Bod whips Johnny hard into the wall and lifts him up...OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE THROUGH THE TABLE & SCOTTY. Black T punch officials who get in their way, no longer caring about the possibility of fines and/or suspensions. Black T throw various pies on GPX -- apple, pumpkin, cheery, even poontang...well, they just threw a female worker wearing a GPX t-shirt on them. Being the gentlemen that they are, Black T take a moment to share a glass of punch. They even get seconds--but this punch hurts more. BAM! BOOM! ZAP! SPLISH, SPLASH! SNAP, CRACKLE & POP! POW! WOWZERS! ZOWIE! GPX & Black T duke it out, throwing wild punches. OAOAST officials just throw their hands in the air, they're going to let them go at it until the two sides tire out -- if they tire out. Johnny & Dan exchange chops and Euorpean Uppercuts respectively. Scotty hits T-Bod with anything he can get his hands on--rolls, hamburgers, etc. Static picks up a slice of pizza, takes a bite, and slaps it across T-Bod's million dollar face. He grabs a pair of TONGS...T-Bod's eye bright up like a Christmas tree. Static squeezes the tongs for all their worth. Dan kicks J.J. between the legs and drops him thru table with a FALCON ARROW. Black goes over to another table and grabs a BEER KEG. T-Bod's jumping up and down as Static continues squeezing the tongs while slapping him, getting a kick out of T-Bod's pain. No doubt payback for getting smashed over the head with the wine bottle last week. From behind Dan nails Scotty with the beer keg. He places the keg on the floor and has T-Bod hold it down horizontally. Black sticks Scotty between his legs and lifts up, putting his right hand through Static's legs and locking it with his left hand. CRADLE PILEDRIVER! The OAOAST must've bought that keg from the .99 cent store, because the keg busts open, spilling the beer down the floor. Many of the people inside the room get on their knees, sucking up as much as the beer they can. To them beer means more than life itself. Black T fall on one knee each, clearly tired from the fighting. Thank goodness it appears to have ended. OAOAST officials close in--but Johhny "Jam" Jackson comes running at them, the officials move out of the way, Johnny grazes T-Bod's head with his right fists knocking him down, and tackles Dan all the way through the back exit into THE PARKING LOT. Johnny & Dan land just feet away from Jim Cornette & the NNMX, who are loading their luggage into their rental car. They get away from the action, as J.J. nails Dan with a TRASHCAN LID. One for T-Bod as well. Then Johnny throws T-Bod head first into the car's window, breaking it; T-Bod receives small lacerations. Johnny sticks him arm into the car and takes out Cornette's TENNIS RACKET. BOOM! BOOM! Johnny tosses the racket back to a furious Jim Cornette. Jackson picks up a trashcan and dumps the trash on GPX, ala Black T dumping the pies on them earlier, although this is much worse than pies. T-Bod -- FULL NELSON SLAM on the TRASHCAN. Dan with the German Suplex. How many times have you seen a brawl where somebody uses a German Suplex? Yeah. Me neither. COLE Cornette & the Midnights can be seen laughing at the very top right-hand corner of the screen. They're facing Black T on Sunday, and the challengers are involved in what has turned into a street fight with another previous tag title holder, GPX. They should be loving this. Imagine if their two biggest threats -- and make no mistake about it, they are their biggest threats until proven otherwise -- take each other out. Dan grabs a ladder nearby, and slams it on Johnny. He then picks up the crushed trashcan and bashes it across Jackson's face. T-Bod helps Dan setup the ladder. Dan slowly climbs the rungs closest to Johnny, the wear and tear of this brawl beginning to become clear. A piece of sheetrock breaks over T-Bod's head. Scotty Static has returned! Dan doesn't know Scotty's behind him. OOF! Scotty whacks a lead pipe across Dan's midsection. Dan grunts, slightly bending over while doing his best to hold onto the ladder. Scotty tries shaking him off to no avail. So he does the next best thing -- hits him again with the lead pipe. GPX launch Dan off the ladder on top of the car nearby -- not just any car, but the car of the NNMX. Cornette, "Sarcastic" Simon & "Narcissistic" Ned place their hands on top of their heads, obviously stunned and upset they'll have to pay the rental company for the damages. T-Bod comes to the aid of his partner but as he nears the car Scotty hits him with THE SHOOTING STAR LARIAT! Back on top of the car, Johnny pumphandles Dan and turns it into a piledriver. BEAT DROP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! The maneuver sent off the car alarm. The NNMX tackle Scotty to the ground. Johnny shoves Dan to the ground and gets up -- WHAM! Cornette nails him from behind with that damn tennis racket. Ned throws T-Bod over the car, while Simon drives Scotty's face on the cement. Singleton whips Scotty towards Ned...droptoe hold into the car door. Static's head snaps back in an brutal whiplash effect. Cornette hands Simon a lead pipe. Singleton strokes the pipe, then cocks it back... THUD! ...Scotty's head slides down the door where a big dent is left from the pipe shot. Scotty Static is out cold. Johnny Jackson dives on top of the Midnights, Jim Cornette squares around trying to get a good look at Johnny. WHAM! Again, Cornette blasts J.J. with that tennis racket. Simon climbs the top of the car, Ned slams Johnny on the ladder. "Narcissistic" Ned throws Simon off the car onto Johnny. THE ROCKET LAUNCHER. The Midnight stand over Johnny, shoving the tag titles in his face, paint brushing (slapping) him. GRRRRR! Those grunts and growls aren't from a loose dog but...HELL'S HITMEN have arrived. Cornette & the NNMX are scared shitless, as they back away towards their car. Black T push them down and take off in their car. The NNMX scream at Black T. Jivin' J.R. comes running out of nowhere, yelling "Wait for me! Wait for me!" He dives at the car...and completely misses, landing hard on the road. J.R. gets up and continues chasing after the car. If Donald Duck was human, Jivin' J.R. is how he'd look chasing a car. The NNMX run onto the road, sticking their thumbs out, trying to hitch a ride but every car that passes by drives past them. They try to highjack a taxi, but the cabby pulls out a gun. As you'd suspect the Midnights back off. They commandeer a passing SCHOOL BUS filled with kids. Hell's Hitmen stick their faces on the windows causing all the kids to scream. The NNMX drive away, leaving a puff of smoke behind as Hell's Hitmen powerwalk after the bus. COLE This is without a doubt one of the damnest things we've ever seen. But why didn't the NNMX attack Black T, their opponents this Sunday night at AngleSlam, live on pay-per-view? COACH The only thing I can think of is maybe they thought GPX did enough damage to them, so they decided to attack their next biggest threat. COLE Or perhaps it's due to the NNMX & Black T's mutal hate for GPX. A school bus at this time of night? COACH Michael Jackson after school program. COLE Wait a minute...wait a minute. Bill Watts, the Chairman of the board of directors, is asking for some time. WATTS Enough is enough, Michael. They wanna hit officials? They wanna use tables, ladders, and chairs? Well, the NNMX-Black T match has been revised. We're gonna take the last 3 World's tag team champions and put them in one match...a 3 way Tables, Ladders & Chairs match. Cole's jaw drops, the crowd pops huge for that announcement. WATTS The only way to win is by climbing a ladder and removing the belts from a cable suspending them above the ring. Thank you. COLE Wow. AngleSlam just got even wilder. The event is sold out, so the only way you can join us is by ordering AngleSlam on pay-per-view. Call your local cable or satellite provider to order now! We got to break with an on-screen graphic, reading: BREAKING NEWS... JUST ANNOUNCED FOR ANGLESLAM... TABLES, LADDERS & CHAIRS OAOAST TAG TEAM CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH Black T vs. The Global Party XChange vs. The New New Midnight Express (We go to break with Cole screaming to order the pay per view) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break) COLE Hello again everyone, and welcome back to HeldDOWN~! The crowd cheers hooray for HD! COACH It's been a hell of a ride so far, and things are only gonna get hotter in three days, when we arrive at AngleSlam! COLE Absolutely, we're all excited for what promises to be one of the hottest events of the summer. Wanna run down the matches, Coach? COACH Let's do it! The "Dial AS for AngleSlam" logo flashes across the screen as Cole and Coachman go into full-on shill mode. COLE First off, let's start with a doozy in our prestigious X-division champion, Rick Edwards, defending his title against his own cousin, J. Arthur Edwards! COACH Aw, this is gonna be one hell of a match, Mikey, I can tell. It's got two great athletes, but it's also become very personal, as J. Arthur and Father have gone out of their way to ruin Rick's life! COLE No doubt that Rick will have revenge on his mind for the heinous crimes perpetrated against him as of late. COACH Speaking of heinous, the Machine's Christopher Cain will also be in action, taking on the returning Judas! COLE We haven't seen Judas in quite some time, but he has answered the challenge laid out by Father and Cain, and he will help his friend Rick fight the Machine. COACH Fight the machine...good line, Cole! COLE Thank you. And when you talk about great action and great athletes, two names that come to mind immediately are Drek Stone and Leon Rodez, and these two men will meet at AngleSlam. COACH Well we've seen them get into each other's faces, and once again, Drek Stone has been playing the mind games. He's a master of them, but will it be enough to overcome Leon Rodez's dynamic assault? We'll find out at AngleSlam! COLE And how's this for dynamic? A fatal four-way tag team match between the Bryant cousins, Nate and Mikey Tethers, the Frankensteiners, and the Skulls! COACH Aw, man, that's gonna be off the chain! Four of the hottest, freshest, newest tag teams mixing it up like only the OAOAST can! COLE Another great tag team match in store, as the Saints will take on Chicks Over Dicks in an "Almost Famous" match! The first team to hit their finishers three times wins! COACH Yeah, a unique match to be sure, and don't forget the stips! If the Saints win, Alix and Krista become their groupies, but if COD wins, Synth and Logan become their...their "muses!" But you know who could be my muse? The vivacious Candie! COLE Candie of course the special guest referee for this match. But, when you talk tag team, you gotta be talking about the tag team titles. COACH Yes yes yes. What a match we've got in store there! COLE It's gonna be the Jim Cornette's New New Midnight Express defending in a tables, ladders, and chairs match! A TLC match! And their opponents? Black T....AND the GPX! COACH The tag team division is hotter than ever and these three teams have had some epic encounters! But they may outdo themselves yet again at AngleSlam! COLE Yeah, and speaking of titles, how about the 24/7 title? Hoff defends against Gunner Sharps! COACH Oh man, I can't wait for this! Hoff has made so many enemies-- COLE You're telling me! COACH Yeah, but Gunner will finally get his shot at Hoff! And will Chris Stevens play a factor? COLE Speaking of factors, or factions, we've got word that the Inten5e's Mad Cappa is gonna have it out with Stephen Joseph, their leader! COACH Who knows what we can expect here? I mean, Joseph is their leader! COLE Well, I guess Cappa's had enough! And speaking of having had enough...we come to Panther taking on Chris Bryte in a steel cage. COACH Panther is a man pushed to the edge, pushed as far as he can go, but Mikey, after the injury we saw Panther sustain earlier, who knows if this match will even go down? COLE Well, knowing Panther, I doubt he'd let anything stop him. COACH Well that remains to be seen. And speaking of "seeing"-- COLE Nice transition, Walter Cronkite. COACH Kiss my ass. We've got a match that will be a sight to be seen: the first-ever Barbed Wire Purgatory match between Sly Sommers and Calvin Szechstein. COLE Over the past few months, Calvin has made Sly's life a living hell, disbanding Totally Endorsed, casting him aside, costing him matches, laying in sneak attacks -- I mean, Sly is ready for some payback. COACH This one will be a bloody, bloody spectacle, folks. COLE And that brings us to our main event: the OAOAST World Championship, to be decided in a "Survive or Surrender" match, between the champion Zack Malibu, and the Female Phenom, the #1 contender...Crystal. COACH MAH GIRL~! COLE Now here are the rules once again. A "no escape" cage, with a roof and no doors. There are no pinfalls, there is no time limit. The only way to win is to get your opponent to tap out, pass out, or say those magic words...I quit. COACH Finally, the feud between Zack Malibu and Crystal will come to a definitive end, and you can see it all, ONLY at OAOAST AngleSlam!! COLE Folks, remember the date: this Sunday, August 29th, live from London, England, and LIVE on pay-per-view! Call your cable company now, and get ready for the summer's hottest event: OAOAST AngleSlam! (Cut to locker room, where Crystal's lacing her boots for her match later on. Sly Sommers walks into the camera's view and sits down on the bench where she's balancing herself.) SLY Hey, you got a minute? CRYSTAL Sure...aren't you supposed to be prepping for our match later? SLY I have been; can't you tell by how bad my armpits stink? CRYSTAL Well, there's usually an odor in here, but anyway, go on... SLY I just wanted to make sure that we make it clear that we're gonna go into this match friends, but not hold back as soon as that bell rings. But, when the bell rings to end it...we're still going to be the same two people we were before the match, and the friendship isn't broken. CRYSTAL I agree totally. I've actually been looking forward to this for a while: a match where I can actually go out there and concentrate on my athleticism instead of my intense hatred for Malibu and his goons in the Thrillogy. SLY I know exactly what you're talking about; I just want Sunday to come as soon as possible so I can destroy Calvin once and for all and be done with it. But anyway...(stands up) may the best man...I mean, person win? (extends hand) CRYSTAL May the best person win. (shakes Sly's hand) SLY One more thing: good luck with your title match on Sunday, but I'm STILL waiting for my other shot at the belt that the Board of Directors has been ignoring since May, when Zack went out and got all evil and such. CRYSTAL I'll see what I can do. SLY Thanks. See you out there... (Sly walks off; camera close-up of Crystal) (FADE TO BLACK) (Go to break) Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted August 27, 2004 (Return from break) COACH Coming up is our huge main event of the evening, as we'll see two friends collide in Sly Sommers and Crystal. But before we go into that, we've just been sent a message from the Board of Directors through our production truck, with some HUGE news! COLE Next week on this program, whoever wins the main event at Angleslam will not have much time to rest, as somehow, the new number one contender will be decided in some sort of match, and it will NOT involve the loser of the Angleslam Submit or Surrender match! COACH That's HUGE! Now, here we go, our main event as we head into Angleslam this Sunday night. Due to losing a "Losers Become Opponents" tag team match last week to Zack Malibu and Calvin Szechstein of the Thrillogy, Crystal and Sly Sommers, who have become quite close as of late, will have to square off one-on-one here tonight. DUDE Hey, this is your totally random color commentator, selected to replace Caboose even though this was written...I mean, taped with him already in. Anyway, these two are actually one-to-one in their unofficial series of matches against each other, as Crystal beat Sly in the often-forgotten Bayside Death Match back a year ago, and Sly defeated Crystal in the first round of the 2004 Super X Cup this past February. COLE Both have changed so much since then, in both their personalities and ring styles. Speaking of ring styles, apparantly Crystal has a new variation on her finisher, calling it the Edgeucator, with it being much like Edge's Figure Four Edgelock, a Sharpshooter while hooking the opponent's arms, which is sometimes called the Edgeucator, I guess. COACH Can't you see what is happening here? The Thrillogy is pitting these two against each other to both weaken them for Sunday's huge matches AND to weaken their bond. Divide and conquer. DUDE No, no, no....the Thrillogy want to see this match in the interest of athletic competition. COLE ...and the fact that these two will go full-tilt against each other and might be too worn out to be at one-hundred percent this Sunday night. COACH Whatever...let's go to the ring! ("Gimme Back My Bullets" starts up, and Sly Sommers comes out to a good pop. He plays it up for a second before going around and slapping hands with fans in the front row.) BUFFER The following is your HeldDOWN~! main event of the evening! Introducing first, from Bayside, California...weighing in tonight at 196 pounds...he is Sly Sommers! COLE Sly Sommers doesn't seem to be as out-and-out psyched out for this match as he usually is. DUDE Maybe he's taking Crystal lightly... COACH I doubt it; I think he respects her as an athlete just as much, if not more than most OAOAST wrestlers. ("Set It Off" then starts playing, and Crystal comes out to a HUGE pop. After soaking it up for a few seconds, she too goes around and slaps hands.) BUFFER And his opponent...from Coquitlam, British Columbia...weighing in tonight at 150 pounds....she is "The Female Phenom" Crystal! COLE Maybe I was wrong...maybe they've both agreed to just loosen up and let things be for this match. *DING**DING* Both competitors pop their wrists and necks in their corners before coming to mid-ring and shaking hands. Both then back away and circle around the ring, clapping their hands as the crowd starts clapping along in unison to get behind both competitors. Sly and Crystal then dive in and they both lock up. They struggle mid-ring until Sly drops down to his knees to get leverage before forcing Crystal into a neutral corner. He backs off and gives her a clean break. They both come out of the corner to circle around mid-ring before locking up again. This time, Crystal gets under Sly for leverage and forces him into a corner. She then backs off and gives him a clean break. COLE Both competitors are showing nice sportsmanship in the early going. Both wrestlers come out of the corner once again and lock up center-ring. They struggle in the middle of the ring before both drop down at the same time for leverage. They continue the struggle while on their knees before bending over while on their knees for any leverage advantage possible. Crystal then gives one big boost of power, but she gives too much as she ends up slipping out of grip. Sly takes advantage by holding Crystal's head down and rising to his feet. The crowd boos until he holds his hand out to help her up. She accepts and pulls herself up. DUDE Let's stop with all the lovey-dovey sportsmanship crap and get to some fightin'! Both competitors then lock up center-ring again. They both end up working their way down to their knees for a leverage advantage again. But this time, Crystal is able to slip under and aside Sly to send him down to the mat face-first. She rises up and helps to pull him up. Both wrestlers slap hands as a sign of sportsmanship before going for a Greco-Roman knucklelock. They carefully lock fingers on one side before reaching up and slowly, but cautiously doing the same with the other hand. Sly powers her down, but she bridges. She is then able to power her way back onto her feet. COLE I could make a lame joke about Crystal not being "held down" here, but I won't. Crystal then locks her ankle around Sly's near ankle and powers him over. But, he bridges over as well, and slowly powers his way back to his feet. Sly then lifts one foot to push down on Crystal's left hand until she lets go of his right hand before twisting around, dropping Crystal's right hand, and bringing her over and down with a side headlock takedown. Sly quickly backs off and rises to his feet to shake off his left wrist. COACH If this were an amateur match, that'd be, what, two points for Sly? COLE Hell if I know...I just call this fak...I mean, "sports entertainment" stuff. Sly lets Crystal rise to her feet, as she even applauds him for a second on his takedown. Both wrestlers then lock up again, and Sly locks in a headlock. Sly brings her over with another side headlock takedown. He cranks down on the side headlock on the mat before Crystal lifts her legs and pulls Sly into a side headscissors. Sly can't manage to pull his head out, so he rolls backwards and onto his feet so that she's on her chest. Sly then powers his arms into the headscissors to pry apart her legs before shoving them down to the mat and hopping onto his rear end to lock in another side headlock. DUDE I hate the guy, but I don't think I've ever seen anyone do that one before. Sly cranks down on her head and neck for a few seconds before Crystal hooks Sly's upper leg and turns him over for a pin attempt... 1... Sly rolls back down on his rear end with the headlock intact. Sly cranks down on the hold again, but Crystal again hooks his upper leg and brings him over to a pinning predicament... 1... Sly rolls back to a side headlock position. Crystal then curves her legs so that she's horizontally lying down behind Sly instead of her legs behind directly behind her. She then slowly squeezes her head out before hooking his far arm with her legs and using the near arm to bring him over for a crucifix pin... 1... 2..kickout. COLE That was barely a two-count, as neither is even close to being worn down this early. I think she was using the position as an escape, and happened to be able to pin Sly with it. Both competitors then rise to their feet for a polite applause. They then lock up again in center-ring. Sly tries to slide Crystal into a headlock yet again, but she drops down to avoid it and goes behind to lock in a reverse waistlock. Sly can't figure an escape, so he reaches back to grab her. But, doing that left him open for Crystal to send him down to the mat with a single-leg takedown. She then wrenches his left ankle while standing up, as the crowd politely applauds again. COACH You can tell, from even this early on, that she's going to soften up Sly's legs to make sure that she can easily apply the Edgeucator. Sly tries reaching up to attempt to break her clutch on his ankle, but can't. He then spins over onto his stomach as she holds on, and crosses his legs in a "4" formation. He then pushes down with his bent, free leg to bend the leg that she has ahold of, and pull her into a headlock from a kneeling position, which elicits an applause from the rather smark-like audience. Sly rises to his feet as he keeps ahold of the side headlock. Crystal can't get out, so she tries shoving Sly off to the ropes. But, he pivot-steps, and switches arms to keep the headlock applied, as the crowd applauds again. COLE The headlock strategy works in two ways, as that hold both wears down the opponent, as well as weakens her neck, obviously setting up the Cravateface. Crystal struggles to get out for another seven-eight seconds, but can't. So, she reaches down and sends Sly down to the mat stomach-first with a reverse single-leg takedown. She then turns him over using the leg, and goes back to the standing ankle twist, which the crowd applauds. Sly again can't reach up, and Crystal has her feet planted firmly on the mat. So, Sly tilts himself onto his upper back while holding his free leg in mid-air before kipping up onto one foot, as she holds onto his ankle. He then rolls forward and flips her using the ankle that she's been twisting, as the crowd applauds the clever move. DUDE You know, all of these "smart marks" around us are really starting to annoy me with their applauding of all this technical dry-humping crap. Both athletes are up, as a faint "Let's Go Sly!" chant starts up. From the other side, a slightly louder "Let's Go Crystal" chant follows. Pretty soon, two large groups of fans start to battle-chant each other, one cheering for Sommers and the other for Crystal. "LET'S GO SLY!" "LET'S GO CRYSTAL!" "LET'S GO SLY!" "LET'S GO CRYSTAL!" Sly even starts to play it up, as both athletes are now standing and circling around, looking for their next move. COACH It's safe to say that our crowd is split 50-50 between these two fan favorites. Crystal then dives in for a collar-and-elbow tie-up, but Sly grabs her near arm. He tries to bring her down by it, an obvious transitional move into the Cravateface. But, she plants her feet firmly in the mat and can't be taken down. She then reaches out and grabs Sly's leg to trip him down to the mat. She then plants her leg in and crosses Sly's legs around it, going for the Edgeucator. She turns it over, but forgets her ring positioning, as she turns him right into the ropes, and is forced to break it once again. COLE Both competitors made crucial mistakes here, as I think the excitement in the crowd caused them to want to go for their big moves early. The problem with that is, neither is worn down NEARLY enough to be put in either hold, let alone submit to it. She gives a clean break, and lets Sly get to his feet. We can see both competitors mouth "good move" to each other, as they again cautiously go around center-ring, readying themselves for the next move. Crystal sticks her hand out for another Greco-Roman knucklelock. Sly slowly sticks his hand out to lock hands. He then cautiously locks his fingers with hers, but then pulls her in by the hand and locks in a cravate, twisting her neck. She struggles to get out of the hold as he cranks down even harder. She can't escape, so she rolls forward, with the momentum freeing her head as she rolls onto her feet. She then slides between Sly's open legs and scores with a reverse legsweep before wrapping her leg around Sly's as he lies on his stomach and locking in a stepover toehold (leg-based portion of the STF). COLE We rarely get to see anything of this nature in this promotion, as most of the time, the matches break out into brawls or one side cheats to maintain an advantage early. But, I've got to say, from a purist's vantage point, I'm lovin' this! DUDE You, a purist? ::laughs:: Crystal leans forward to apply more pressure to the shin and ankle, and pushes down on Sly's hamstring, squeezing it in different directions with her hands, to attack the whole leg. That actually becomes a crucial mistake, as Sly reaches back with his left arm and grabs the arm that's pushing down on his hamstring. He then reaches back and gets a slight grip on her arm with his other hand before pulling her onto the mat stomach-first and freeing himself from the hold before immediately going into a front chancery (front facelock with arm hooked) while lying on the mat on his stomach. COACH That's exactly how good these two are, that they can't leave themselves open even THAT slightly, or else they'll pay for it later. Crystal tries pushing and twisting out of the hold, but Sly has it locked in firmly and is planted on the mat. So, she goes onto her tippy-toes and basically forms a vertically-pointing curve with her body. She then plants her free hand on the mat and rolls forward, barely escaping the chancery. She quickly grabs Sly's leg and hooks it around her own to go back to the stepover toehold. COLE It looks like both athletes are trying to find a rather basic move that they can keep locked in and apply pain to their targetted body parts for lengthened parts of time. She doesn't push down on his hamstring this time, so he can't grab anything as he reaches back. She slightly stands on her free leg's tippy-toes to apply more pressure. Sly then twists around and snaps forward his free leg to send Crystal down on her stomach with an inverted drop toe hold-type manuever. Sly goes for another headlock, but Crystal works her way up to her feet quickly and sweeps Sly off of his feet and back onto his stomach. She then stands with one foot on the back of his knee, grabs his foot on the same leg, and snaps back to fall, pulling and twisting the ankle and shin! COACH That could not have been pleasant for Sly's leg! DUDE Come on...hit him in the (bleep) already! She then holds Sly's leg out so that it's not bending, and holds it down to the mat. She then does a headstand on his leg. She hops up using her hands and comes down with a completely vertical headbutt onto the side of his knee. He rolls over while holding his leg, but we see her rolling to the side, holding her neck. COLE It looks as if, when she came down with the vertical headbutt, that she jammed her neck with all of her own body weight coming directly down on her neck and head. She slowly rises to her feet while holding her neck, as he had rolled outside of the ring and is shaking his leg off from the pain thus far. He then rolls back into the ring and gets up. Once again, they pace around center-ring, trying to position themselves to make the next move. She then dives after his leg, but he drops down and puts her in a front facelock. COACH It's almost as if he put his targetted leg out for her as bait, and she took it! Sly hooks her arm and turns her onto her back while keeping her head hooked. He lies on her for the cover... 1... 2... Kickout. Sly then turns her over on her stomach as he lies on his, keeping ahold of the front facelock. Sly then works his way up to his feet, keeping ahold of her head and neck while cranking down. When he gets to a full standing position, he quickly twists around and brings her down with a snapmare. Sly then drops down to his knees and locks in a rear chinlock on a sitting Crystal. Crystal struggles as Sly clamps down on the hold. COLE The rear chinlock: one of the most basic holds in wrestling, but still damn effective. Crystal tries squeezing her head out and turning over, but can do neither because of Sly's grip on her. She then grabs onto Sly's arm with both hands and bridges herself up to her feet. Sly has no choice but to rise with her, but can't keep ahold of her and she escapes. She then hops up, hooks Sly's leg as he stands behind her, and brings him down on his stomach with a legscissors roll into an achilles lock (pushing up on toe of boot to hurt achilles tendon). COACH That was shades of Ken Shamrock, someone whose name I'd never thought I'd be bringing up here on HeldDOWN~!. Sly struggles for the ropes, but is nowhere near them. So, he turns over and ends up turning her on her stomach and breaking the hold in the process. He then leans forward to lock in the stepover toehold, and hooks her chin to complete the STF. Crystal reaches outward, and starts crawling with her hands, until she scores with a rope break. COLE It looks like Sly is fighting fire with fire, using the stepover toehold that Crystal has been utilizing in this contest, and taking it one step further to attack her neck. Crystal gets to her feet slower than Sly does, and ends up paying for it. When she turns around to face him, he's able to reach over her and butterfly her arms. He then brings her over with a double-underhook suplex, and bridges with it for a pin.... 1... 2... Crystal gets her shoulder off of the mat. Sly then rolls back and locks in a Butterfly Lock. He pushes down on Crystal's neck with his armpit with the hold, until she twists over and is able to escape. He ends up on his stomach, and she quickly manuevers herself near his legs. She hooks his legs in Indian Deathlock position before hooking her leg over the leg that's outstretched in the formation. She then bridges backwards and hooks his arms. She turns the entire thing over, pinning Sly onto his shoulders (ala Molly Holly's old Twin City Bridge while in WCW)... 1... 2... Kickout. When kicking out, Sly flattens the hold out and ends up with a Figure Four Leglock being applied on him by accident. Sly crawls away quickly and grabs the ropes to get out. Crystal gives him a clean break, as he pulls himself up with the ropes. Both competitors don't waste time going to center-ring, as they lock up once again immediately. She goes for a bodyslam on him, but he hooks her head and brings her over with a snapmare as she tries to slam him down to the mat. COLE I will say this about Sly: he's one of the most defensive-minded wrestlers to come around the block in a long, long while. He then goes for another seated chinlock. But, she sees it coming and is able to scoot to the side. She hooks Sly from the side as she rises to her feet. She then brings him down with a side Russian legsweep before hooking Sly's legs around hers and ending up with an angled Nagatalock (Figure Four variation where attacker pushes down opponent's leg with bottom of boot instead of hooking it under the vertical leg of opponent). DUDE I'm about ready to fall asleep with all of this scientifical crap. Sly wards off Crystal's attempts to shove him away, and reaches in to try and pull his legs out from the hold. He has to shove her legs away and scoot himself away to avoid her blocking his attempts, but he eventually makes an escape with his hands. He keeps ahold of her leg and pulls her closer to him. He then lunges at her and locks in a Tazzmission on the mat. She slowly tries to work her way up and out of the hold. About fifteen seconds of her succeeding at getting to her feet causes Sly to go for a bodyscissors to keep her down. But, she grabs his hurt leg and falls down on her side to crush it. He lets go of the hold due to the pain. COACH She doesn't weigh much for a person, but one-hundred and fifty pounds will still hurt a body part quite a bit. She then holds his leg down on the mat with both hands, as she gets to her feet. She then does a slight headstand on the leg, and comes down with a kneedrop onto his injured leg. She does another slight headstand, and connects with a second kneedrop. She does a third slight headstand, and nails a third straight kneedrop to the leg. COLE She's again using her own body weight to crush her target... DUDE ...just like all women! COACH Shut up and appreciate this match, will you? Crystal attempts to set something up by wrapping Sly's targeted leg around her far leg, but Sly gets his free leg up and wraps that around Crystal's upper thighs. He then shifts his weight and sends her down to the mat on her back, in a horizontal bodyscissors pinning predicament (re: RVD in Smackdown 5)... 1... 2... Crystal rolls all of the way through while keeping ahold of Sly's foot. She then locks in an anklelock. Sly slowly pushes himself up with his hands while grunting from the pain of the anklelock. Sly then hooks his free leg underneath Crystal's armpit and rolls through for a victory roll-like cradle... 1... 2... Kickout. Both competitors come back up, and Crystal goes for Sly's leg. But, he steps over her with his free leg, spins around, and brings her over with an Oklahoma Roll... 1.. 2.. Kickout. But, in kicking out, Crystal accidentally positions herself perfectly for a Crossface, which Sly locks in. Crystal tries getting to the ropes, but he has it locked in in center-ring. So, she slowly scoots herself over, eventually working herself in a sitting position beside Sly as he keeps her head hooked. She then hooks his leg and brings him down for a pin... 1... 2... Sly reverses by bringing her over into a crucifix... 1... 2... Kickout. Crystal lands on her stomach when she kicks out, and Sly immediately manuevers himself, butterflies her arms, and turns her over into a Butterfly Lock. He cranks down, as the camera can pick up on her screaming in pain. Sly leans down and yells at the referee to check to see if she will submit, but she shakes her head "no". Sly then places her head down on the mat and locks in a side headlock, trapping her arm in between his legs. COLE Smart move there by Sommers, trapping her arm so that she cannot reverse the hold so easily. Crystal can't make an escape, so she works her way up to her knees, trying to get to her feet. He keeps her head and arm trapped, as she slowly makes a successful attempt at getting to a standing position. She escapes the headlock, but her arm's still trapped with him down on the mat. But, Crystal repositions herself while standing, hooks his legs around, and goes for the Texas Cloverleaf. DUDE I didn't think those Ca-schmucks liked Texas all that much... She tries turning the hold both ways, desperately trying to get him over onto his stomach. But, he won't let her turn him. He then scoots backwards as she has ahold of his legs, and grabs the middle rope. As the referee starts the rope break count, he grabs onto the top rope and pulls himself up to a sitting position on the top rope. He then shoves her off of him using his legs. COLE That was rather creative. Sly then hops back down to a standing position, but is using the top rope to assist him in walking, as Crystal's legwork looks to have had its toll on him. Crystal gets up and walks towards him. She yanks on his leg as he grabs onto the top rope for dear life. She finally yanks him off and nails a dragon screw legwhip. She then immediately locks in a legbar. DUDE You know, I didn't think friends tried to rip other friends' legs off. Sly reaches out for the ropes to break the hold, but can't grasp them. So, he starts shoving at Crystal's hands and arms to try and get her to release the hold. He completely breaks the grip on her right arm, and scoots away quickly to escape fully. She goes after him again, as he crawls away from her. But, she walks into his trap, as he brings her in with a small package... 1... 2... Kickout. Sly keeps ahold of her and immediately locks in a front choke as soon as Crystal kicks out. Crystal tries reaching out for some sort of rope break, but can't. She then takes advantage of Sly not being able to scissors her body, and turns herself and Sly over. She then bridges up to pin him in Northern Lights fashion... 1... 2... Kickout. Sly lets go of Crystal's head as she kicks out, allowing Crystal to roll backwards and hook the hurt leg. She then turns it over into a half-crab. Sly pushes himself upward and tries reaching out to the ropes, but she pulls him closer to center-ring. Sly retaliates by hooking his free leg underneath her far armpit. He then powers up with his legs, and flips her over into a Thesz Press-style pin.... 1... 2... Crystal literally slides out of the predicament by hooking his inner thighs and going feet-first between his legs until she's completely out. She keeps ahold of the hurt leg and locks in an anklelock. Sly screeches in pain as he works his way up to one foot. She keeps it locked in as he makes one hop and grabs onto the top rope with both hands. He then hooks his free ankle and foot around the back of Crystal's neck, and swings himself around to bring her over with an inverted flying headscissors. COACH Sommers is having to get creative with his escapes, as he's not being able to keep up with Crystal by traditional means. Both competitors come to their feet, and Sly limps over to Crystal. He ducks down into a go-behind, which he then uses to go into a schoolboy... 1... 2... Kickout. She rolls over onto all fours via proxy after kicking out, and immediately goes after Sly's legs. Sly hooks onto her head, and they struggle for supremacy on the mat before falling back into the ropes, as the referee orders them both to seperate. COLE This is starting to get a bit heated here. Both seperate, and rise to their feet with Sly having to use the ropes to assist for his hurt leg. Crystal rubs her own neck for a second, as both stare down one another in preparation for their next move. They then both quickly lunge in for a quick gripping on a Greco-Roman knucklelock. Sly then bases his good leg behind Crystal and forces her down on the mat. He then does a headstand on her hands, but when he comes back down, she immediately wraps her leg around his. COACH She's just about like a shark seeing red when it comes to that leg. She then forces him down on his chest beside her. She pushes herself to a kneeling position on his leg, and then wraps her near ankle and shin around his hurt ankle and shin, while facing away from him. She then bridges back and hooks his neck in a chinlock, before turning the hold over and completeing the Mutolock. But, about five seconds into the hold, Sly reaches back himself and cranks up on her chin himself. COLE Turnabout is fair play, folks. Sly then tilts himself around until he can get the hold turned over, with himself on bottom. Both wrestlers keep cranking on one-another's chins and necks, as Crystal shifts her weight and flips the move over once more. They keep cranking down on one another, and Sly's bad leg is still being cranked on, as he turns the move over once more. But, they land in the ropes and have to break. DUDE They looked like a four-armed war veteran rolling around in there...you know, an old fart that got his legs blasted off in the war. COACH Will you stop it? Both competitors come to their feet, and they're really starting to show worse for the wear. They lock up in a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Crystal then performs a go-behind into a waistlock into a legsweep, but Sly sticks his hands out so that he doesn't fall on the mat before pushing himself back up to a standing position and bending down to sweep Crystal off of her feet from the side. He then hooks her ankles under his armpits while facing away, and turns it over into a reverse Boston Crab. COLE I rarely question these wrestlers, me being untrained myself, but why in the hell is he not sticking on working over that neck? He tries hooking her hands to create a Pendulum, but she keeps her hands spread out so that he can't reach them. She then pushes down off of the mat, and is able to flip him over into a prawn hold pin (ala Owen Hart)... 1.. 2... Kickout. When Sly kicks out, he leaves his leg wide open. Crystal takes advantage of that, as she immediately transitions into a kneeling Brocklock. Sly squeals in pain, reaching out for anything he can. He eventually uses mind over matter, as he lifts his free leg up and uses it to pull Crystal down into a side headscissors. She tries bridging for an escape, but Sly reaches out and shoves down on her stomach to keep her down. Crystal then reaches out and grabs Sly's hurt ankle, and starts to twist on it. Sly quickly lets go of the headscissors in pain. COACH Very primistic and obvious, but it's effective. Crystal keeps ahold of Sly's leg as she gets to her feet, and then applies a spinning toe hold. She repeatedly cranks on the ankle, attempting to get Sly to submit to it. But, after the eighth crank, she accidentally leans in too far, with Sly reacting immediately by pulling her in for a small package... 1... 2... Kickout. Both competitors come back up, and Sly lifts her for a slam. But, his leg gives out on him and he falls back into a pinning predicament... 1... 2... Kickout. Crystal pulls her hair out of her face after the failed pin attempt, as Sly crawls away on his BUTT to the corner. Crystal sees Sly, gets to her feet, and charges at him. But, he reaches up to the top rope, and does a revers flip pull to bring himself to a seated position on the top turnbuckle as Crystal rams her shoulder and the side of her neck into the ringpost. Sly then rolls downward and brings Crystal over with a sunset flip... 1... 2... Kickout. When kicking out, Crystal rolls backwards onto her feet, and grabs Sly's feet. She then tries to go for the Edgeucator (Figure Four Edgelock, aka Sharpshooter with arms hooked). She twists the legs, but Sly hooks her near ankle quickly, and trips her onto her back. Sly then spins himself over on his stomach, in essence spinning Crystal onto her stomach. Sly then pops up to a seated position, with his leg hooked around Crystal's, and grabs Crystal's head for an STF. COACH I'm surprised Sly's going for a move like the STF with his injured leg, as he could re-aggrivate it real quick with it bent like that. Crystal screams in pain as Sly cranks back on her neck, which he's targetted for the entire match. She reaches out in pain before scooting over slightly and grabbing the bottom rope. Sly lets go quickly, and gets to his feet, albeit still limping around. Crystal pulls herself up using the ropes, and clutches at her neck the entire time. Both competitors then meet up in the ring with a front waistlock lock-up, just clutching on for something on their opponent. COLE This is something rarely seen in the pro ranks of wrestling, but can often be seen in sumo, believe it or not. Both competitors try to go low for a leverage advantage, but neither succeds. Finally, Sly gets both of his arms underneath Crystal's, and is able to go for a belly-to-belly suplex lift. But in mid-move, Crystal changes the direction of her body and is able to turn it into a reverse legscissors sweep (much like she used to transition into the anklelock earlier), twists Sly's legs up as he goes down on his face, and locks in a reverse figure four leglock, as the crowd heavily applauds this hold. COACH I cannot believe how quickly Crystal was able to manuever herself there, as she brought down Sly after that reversal lightning-quick, and the weaving of his legs was unreal in its speed. Sly audibly screams in pain as she clinches the hold. Sly reaches out, but cannot get himself to any of the ropes. He then puts his hand in the air, as a light "Tap!" chant starts up. He teases tapping, as he even wiggles his fingers in pain. COLE This could be it! He slowly moves his hand down before.... CABOOSE The wimp boy's gonna give it up! ...he plants it down on the mat, and turning it over to put himself in a seated position with Crystal on her stomach. He then reaches in and unweaves their legs before crawling forward while keeping ahold of Crystal, and hooks her arms in a double chicken wing, pushing the top of his skull into her neck to apply pressure to his target. COACH A version of this hold has made greats like Ricky Steamboat and Ric Flair give it up in World Title situations...it might be able to do in Crystal. Sly even balances one foot in the air to put more weight on Crystal's neck. But, she refuses to give up. Sly's impatience does him in, as he then straddles himself onto Crystal, goes into a squatting position while putting her arms over his legs, and locks in a camel clutch. Crystal muffles in pain until grabbing onto Sly's fingers and attempting to break his clutch on her chin. CABOOSE Can we just end this boring crap? COLE Just leave, will you? DUDE Nah. Sly struggles to keep his fingers locked, but eventually slips after the sweat on his hands from the strenuous match gets too much. But, he immediately goes to his "plan B", as he tucks her head down and rolls her onto her shoulders for a Gedoh Clutch pin... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE That was close! Sly gets to his feet after the kickout, and pulls Crystal up in a front facelock. He then goes for a DDT, but she catches his legs as he falls back and rolls into a jackknife pinning combination... 1... 2... Kickout! Crystal keeps ahold of Sly's hurt leg as she gets to her feet before crossing the legs and turning him over into the Haas of Pain! COACH If she can't get him with this, she's still working over every body part that the Edgeucator damages, and therefore is helping her chances of victory if this hold doesn't work. Sly grits his teeth in pain as she pushes his legs inward. Sly then turns himself over to counter, with his arms hooked around Crystal's arm. He then pushes up off of the mat and brings her over with an inverted hurricanrana on her arm. Both competitors come back up, and Sly brings Crystal with an armdrag. He keeps ahold of the arm and hooks her head. He then pops off of the mat slightly and nails a mini-version of the One Hit Wonder (reverse swinging neckbreaker)! COLE He's weakened the neck enough that executing the move even that slightly might get him the win. Sly then covers her and hooks the leg.... 1... 2... Kickout! Sly keeps ahold of Crystal's head during the pin, and is immediately able to convert into a Dragon Sleeper. Crystal starts to pump her arm in the air to get the crowd behind her in this time of need, and they clap along with every time Crystal pumps her arm up. The crowd's support helps to give her the energy to bridge up to her feet. She then whips herself around, and is then able to walk up the ropes. When she gets to the top rope, she pushes off and causes Sly to fall, with her landing on top for the cover... 1... 2.... Kickout! Crystal holds her neck as she gets up, and notices that Sly had rolled himself on his stomach. She immediately goes for his legs, and attempts to lock in the Edgeucator. But, as she tries turning him over, he rolls himself back and brings her over in an inverted monkey flip. He then rolls back, grabs her arm to turn her over, hooks it between his legs, and goes for the Cravateface! COACH This could be it! But, as Sly tries to lock on the cravate, Crystal rolls forward and away. But, as she rolls through, Sly keeps ahold of her arm and rolls with her. He tries hooking her for something, but she twists it around and brings him over for a backslide... 1... 2... KICKOUT! Crystal immediately pulls Sly up after that, and goes for a fisherman's suplex. But, Sly blocks it, and rolls her through for an inside cradle (small package variation).... 1... 2... KICKOUT! Crystal gets all of the way to her feet after that, but Sly stays on his knees. Crystal grabs his arm for something, but Sly pulls her into a fireman's carry takeover. He then bridges over her prone body for a pin atttempt... 1... 2... Kickout! Sly pulls Crystal up by the arm. He then goes for an Irish whip. But, she twists around in mid-whip, keeps ahold of Sly's arm, and pulls him into a spear! Crystal goes for the cover... 1... 2... KICKOUT! She gets to her feet and puts her leg in between Sly's legs. She then makes sure that Sly's hurt leg is right behind her, and snaps back with it, possibly pulling his hamstring in the process. Crystal pulls Sly to his feet and sets him up in a corner. She then props his bad leg up on the middle rope, and walks to center-ring. She then charges at Sly, but Sly lifts his other leg and slides in between the ropes to the apron, as Crystal crashes into the ringpost with her shoulder and neck. COACH I hope she learns soon that fighting steel makes you a loser every time. She then falls onto her back. Sly grabs onto the top rope with both hands, and slingshots him over the top rope, hitting a splash on her as he lands. Sly then hooks the leg for the cover... 1... 2... KICKOUT! COLE This is becoming "Desperation City", as now both competitors are going for the win relentlessly, as the pace picked up big-time in the past couple of minutes. Sly pulls her up, and does the "thumb across throat" signal to the crowd. "LET'S GO SLY!" "LET'S GO CRYSTAL!" "LET'S GO SLY!" "LET'S GO CRYSTAL!" Sly then lifts Crystal on his back, going for the Sommerset (Piggyback stunner). But, the added weight causes his leg to give out, and both competitors go crashing to the mat. COACH This may be the opportunity that Crystal needs to win this contest. Both competitors crawl around on the mat, exhausted and hurt. They then see each other, and perform a collar-and-elbow tie-up on their knees. They slowly rise to their feet, still tied up. Sly then slips his arm over Crystal's neck and slams her down face-first on the mat with a standing bulldog. Sly sees his positioning, and immediately hooks her arm between his legs...and applies the Cravateface! COLE This is it! I don't see her lasting much longer now! Crystal screams in pain and pumps her fist in the air again, as we hear scattered claps and "Tap!" chants. She reaches out for something... DUDE I can't believe how stupid she is; there's no ropes around her. COLE It's called "being hopeful". DUDE I'm "hopeful" that this match ends soon... ...before placing her hand on the mat, and pushing up with it. Sly's eyes become huge, as he tries to force her back down on the mat while keeping the hold applied. Both competitors slowly get to a standing position, as Sly still cranks down on the neck. She slowly pulls her head out before slipping away. She then pulls her arm out from his legs, and hooks his arms to bring him over with a backslide... 1... 2... KICKOUT! Sly rolls backwards and onto his feet in a bent position, but Crystal immediately pops up and brings him over with a sunset flip... 1... 2... KICKOUT! Both come to their feet a little slower than before. When they do, Crystal charges at Sly, but Sly barely launches himself over her and brings her over with a sunset flip of his own... 1... 2... Crystal rolls forward to reverse and cradle for the pin.... 1.... 2.... Sly tries bridging out, and gets about half-way up before his knee gives out and he falls back down... 1.... 2.... Sly turns Crystal over on her stomach at the last second. He pulls her up with her head positioned between his legs. He then crosses her arms over her lower chest, obviously going for the Slyledriver. He lifts her, but out of nowhere, someone rushes into the ring and bashes Sly over the back with a chair. It's CALVIN! COLE What in the HELL is this? DUDE Ha ha...boys, feast your eyes on how a real man takes care of a job like this! The camera then catches Zack Malibu rush into the ring, and he starts putting the boots to Crystal! *DING**DING* BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, due to outside interference, this match is a no-contest! Zack pulls Crystal over in a corner and chokes her with his boot, as Calvin repeatedly takes turns stomping and/or slamming a chair down on Sly. COACH Damn it! We were on our way to seeing a potential Match of the Year candidate; wrestling in its purest form. But then, the "goon squad" came out and had to ruin it for all of us! CABOOSE Shut the hell up! This is a brilliant plan! Have these two jerkwards wear each other out within an inch of their lives, and then jump in for the kill! Neither Sly nor Crystal's gonna have anything left for this Sunday, and the Thrillogy will once again reign supreme! Calvin tosses the chair over to Zack, who then chokes Crystal with the edge of it. Calvin then pulls a large bag out from outside of his coat, and he opens it to reveal barbed wire! COLE What's the meaning of this? Calvin then wraps Sly's neck with it before grabbing the two ends of the barbed wire roll and pulling them tighter, as he chokes Sly with the barbed wire! COACH He could kill him here! SOMEONE save him! Zack pulls Crystal out of the corner and onto her feet as the choking continues. He then hooks her head and leg, lifts her, and drops her with the P.O.P. Drop! Zack keeps ahold of her on the mat and says something to Calvin. Calvin nods, so Zack gets up and lifts her by the head and leg again...and he drops her with a second P.O.P. Drop! CABOOSE This is how you do things the "Thrillogy Way"! COLE Well, I don't give a flying (bleep) what way they're doing things. We need some (bleep)damn help out here for these two! C'mon! The locker room then empties with preliminary wrestlers, agents, referees, and fan favorites alike, all with the goal of helping out Sly and Crystal. Zack and Calvin bail as soon as the others hit the ring! COACH FINALLY! I just hope it wasn't too late! CABOOSE This is professional wrestling; of COURSE those idiots are too late! The camera closes in on Zack and Calvin surveying their damage from right at the HeldDOWN~! entrance. Various officials and wrestlers are checking over and helping out Sly Sommers and Crystal, as the fans watch on and worry. Calvin and Zack start laughing at what they've done, before Calvin puts his arm around Zack, and both men raise their arms in victory. CABOOSE I LOVE this sight! I guarentee you folks at home: this Sunday night, this is the exact same picture that we will be going off the air with, as the Thrillogy will reign supreme at Angleslam! COLE I sure hope not. Ladies and gentlemen, this Sunday...TLC for the Tag Titles, Hoff/Gunner for the X Title, Sly/Calvin No-Rope Barbed Wire, and Zack versus Crystal with No Time Limit for the World Heavyweight Title! ORDER IT NOW! ::END OF SHOW:: Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
