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OAOAST HeldDOWN~! 8/4/05

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A highlight video of License to Pin (that I'm too lazy to actually put together myself) airs to spoil it for the people that didn't order. At least buy the DVD you cheapskates.

 

OAOAST HeldDOWN~!!

 

La La once again accompanies our opening video. Let's go to the arena in Baltimore, Maryland, where there are more fireworks than Orioles wins lately.

 

fireworks.jpg

 

The cameras show off more fan signs, such as "Knight is X-ceptional", "Push the Cow to the Moon" and a rather large one that reads "Popick Sucks Arse", but that last one is held by a certain someone at Sofa Central.

 

COLE

Put that away!

 

CABOOSE

Hey, I'm nothing but truthful. (Under breath) Wrestling a cow.....

 

COLE

Good Thursday night to everyone; we are coming to you this week from Baltimore, Maryland, but people around the wrestling world are still talking about last Sunday night at Skydome and the great action we saw at License to Pin.

 

COACH

That's right, Cole. The AngleSlam main event right now is still Axel vs. Hoff for the title as both men were victorious. Brodie collected the bounty on Jenny Adams' head while Peter Knight retained his X-Championship in the match of the year, Ultimate X!

 

CABOOSE

And Popick pinned a cow. Big man.

 

COLE

Also on Sunday, we learned that tonight we are going to have a big announcement regarding the General Manager position since Josie Baker was relieved of her duties by the OAOAST Board of Directors. Executive Vice President Bill Watts is in the ring right now, so let's throw it to him.

 

Watts puts a microphone to his lips.

 

WATTS

I am proud to be here live among our great HeldDOWN fans here in Baltimore!

 

"YEAHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

WATTS (CONT'D)

As you might have heard, Ms. Josie Baker is no longer the General Manager of this program. One of the reasons this came to be is the fact that she allowed this company to fall into a state of near-anarchy over the past few months, with "Upstarts" waging war against the OAOAST's more "established" stars. It seems that Ms. Baker just could not handle the stress, rarely showing up at the arenas, not returning calls, and even not attending mandatory meetings at OAOAST Headquarters. When we were searching for a replacement, we wanted someone that could be respected by our Superstars and can lay down the law when problems arise. I believe we have found this person. Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce the NEW General Manager of HeldDOWN......

 

Watts pauses for dramatic effect.

 

WATTS

 

......Calvin Szechstein!!

 

"YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

 

Three-two-one....

 

I'M THE BOMB!!!

 

COLE

OH MY!!

 

"I'm The Bomb" by the Electric Six begins to play over the public address system as Calvin, decked out in a snazzy grey suit, charges through the curtains to a huge ovation.

 

COACH

The last we saw Calvin, he was taken out by the 70s Dude at Anglemania! But now, he's got THE POWAH~!

 

Cal steps through the ropes and shakes hands with Watts, who hands him the microphone before stepping out of the ring. Calvin paces around, a big smile on his face.

 

CALVIN

Well well well. I clean up good, huh?

 

"YEAHHHHHHH!!"

 

CALVIN

Me as General Manager of HeldDOWN....I really wasn't expecting this when I was lying on my couch a few months ago, wondering if I'd ever step into an OAOAST ring, but here I am. I'm not going to go on some long-winded acceptance speech thanking God, Jesus, Santa, my hairstylist; instead I'm going to just say one thing to the fans and one thing to every single person in that locker room. First, to Drek, Zack, GPX, all of you that are involved in this little "Civil War" that's going on: I'm not Josie Baker. I know you all; I've wrestled against you, I've hung out with you, I know what you are all about. If you think I can be manipulated to favor your side, then you can trash those thoughts RIGHT NOW!

 

"YEAHHHHHH!!!"

 

CALVIN (CONT'D)

Because....and this is a vow I am making live to every OAOAST fan.....I will do what is best for the OAOAST. Not what is best for Zack Malibu, not what is best for Drek Stone; the decisions I will make will be for the benefit of these loyal fans that shell out their hard earned money to watch some of the best wrestling out there. I have been involved with this fed for over two years; I am not going to fold under pressure like the previous GM, I will do my damndest to make HeldDOWN worth our fans spending their Thursday nights with us week in and week out. I wouldn't have accepted this job with anything less in mind. And it all starts tonight. Thank you very much.

 

COLE

Wow....strong words from our new GM. I think Watts made a very good decision here, choosing someone that passionate.

 

CABOOSE

I could have done it. I LOVE bossing people around!

 

COLE

We've got a great night of action lined up for you tonight, so stay tuned!

 

Backstage, in the parking lot area, a limo pulls up to the back entrance, where CUBAN WALL and Vitamin X are standing, smacking chewing gum and looking tough in their sunglasses.

 

Wall

He's late.

 

VX

Always late when the important stuff is going on.

 

The chauffer exits his driver's side door and walks around to the passenger side back door of the limo, opening the darkened door so that one man,

 

jerichopout.jpg

 

Stephen Joseph can step out. He's currently on his Verizon~! flip phone

 

(Only 29.99 with two year agreement, call now! 1-800 Verizon).

 

Stephen Joseph (in cell)

Gotcha. I don't trust him, but he could be useful. He doesn't like Zack, remember? Thanks for the heads up. We should meet in a few weeks.

 

Stephen Joseph hangs up his cell phone

 

WALL

How's it going boss?

 

Stephen Joseph

Good. You guys expecting trouble.

 

V-X

Just some weird ass phone calls, that's all. PR says to play safe and stick together.

 

Stephen Joseph

Well, I need a drink. Beating a fat bitch, and a bitch, is tough work. Let's go.

 

...The three walk off.

 

and from around the dark corner...

 

dark-cow-kl.jpg

 

moooooooo...

 

Commercial break

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COLE

Welcome back to the show. On Sunday, we saw what might have been the damndest thing I've seen in a long, long time, as Jenny Adams went into an unsanctioned, no holds barred brawl against Brodie Lewis, the young woman after the $7,500 bounty on her head. Jenny fought hard, but she made the mistake of letting her emotions get the best of her, and got completely desimated in a very, very wild brawl.

 

COACH

In the end, she got knocked out cold, even after being severely cut open on more than a couple of places on her head and body, and was stretchered out of the building. Doctors unfortunately found that Jenny suffered a skull fracture and seperated shoulder, as well as a cut on her forehead being mildly infected, and has been forced to sit at least the next few months out of action. The OAOAST World Women's Title has been held up; stay tuned to the OAOAST TV Network and other OAOAST-affiliated communication venues for details on how the vacancy shall be filled.

 

CABOOSE

In the meanwhile, OAOAST officials aren't giving Brodie the belt like they SHOULD! And not only that...she's STILL suspended! At least she gets some dough...

 

COLE

Speaking of that...does anyone know who exactly was funding this whole thing?

 

COACH

Still no leads, though there's an investigation out. But anyway...Jenny was scheduled to defend her title here tonight against a competitor from Mexico who's coming in for a couple of weeks to help our young female competitors learn more in terms of how to compete in between those ropes, being recommended by Jenny Adams after her and Confusia's stint below the border last summer for the Centuria Federation Libre promotion. Jenny can't wrestle, so her spot goes to "Floggin'" Molly Matthews.

 

COLE

The opponent is Centuria Federation Lucha's top technico star, and their current Freeweight Champion, Pantera Combatienta, which roughly translates to "Panther Fighter". She has a tremendous understanding and expertise of the mat wrestling game, but can go to the air if needed, as she's been wrestling for nearly a decade south of the border. She'll be a tough challenge for Molly Matthews, who wants to be known around the world for her insane Lucha and European-style mat wrestling and pin cradles. This match will be contested under two out of three falls rules, to accomidate Pantera's lucha libre background, though we're not going to the extremes of banning piledrivers and other lucha-specific rules, to not make the playing field too uneven for Molly.

 

CABOOSE

WIthout any further ado, let's go to the ring!

 

Some generic Spanish-orientated music comes on, and out comes Pantera Combatienta, wearing a huge Mexican flag made into a cape, an orange mask with black tiger design all over it, black horns and black fur on the cheeks, a white spandex-like sleeveless shirt, and red and green pants. She slaps hands with some fans, as there's a slight polite applause from the crowd, who doesn't know who she is.

 

BUFFER

The following is a two-out-of-three falls non-title bout with a forty-five-minute time limit! Introducing first, she stands in at five feet, three inches tall, and weighing in tonight at 128 pounds...she is the current Centuria Federation Lucha Freeweight Champion....Pantera Combatienta!

 

COACH

I saw this young lady work out in the ring today with some of the female wrestlers we have here, and I can bet we'll all be in for a treat.

 

"Rebels of the Sacred Heart" starts up, and "Floggin'" Molly Matthews comes out to a chorus of cheers! She throws her cap into the crowd, then runs down the ramp and slides into the ring! She takes off her hockey jersey and tosses it down to the ring attendant before doing a backflip off the top rope and pivoting to bow towards Pantera. Molly and Pantera shake hands mid-ring, then back into their corners.

 

BUFFER

Her opponent...from Boston, Massachusetts, weighing in at weighing in at 136 pounds..."Floggin'" Molly MAAAATHEEEWS!

 

*BELL RINGS*

 

Both competitors circle around mid-ring, trying to figure out how they're going to start off the contest. Molly tries half-hazardly to go for the legs, but Pantera steps back. Molly gets to her feet immediately to avoid an attack from Pantera. Both only stall for about another second, as they quickly charge at one another. They try to get some sort of collar-and-elbow tie-up going, but they can't get their positioning right, so Pantera grabs Molly's hands and locks up Greco-Roman style. They struggle for the advantage back and forth, shoulder-to-shoulder. Combatienta uses her height disadvantage to try and get under Molly to power her over. It succeeds somewhat, as she starts forcing Molly to bridge down to the mat. Molly gets about half-way down...then sees an opening and hooks her leg around Pantera's right knee, pushing upward and taking Pantera's leg out from under her to take her down.

 

COLE

Unique takedown there.

 

Molly keeps ahold of the knucklelock with both hands, trying to pin Pantera's shoulders to the mat. Pantera's able to keep her shoulders off of the mat during this, so Molly lets go of one and goes right into a keylock on the ground. Molly's only able to bend down on Pantera's arm for a second, as Combatienta reaches her legs around and locks in a side headscissors. Pantera cranks down with her thighs, as Molly tries bridging herself to get out. Pantera slaps her in the stomach to stop the attempt. But, Molly bridges up too quickly to be stopped a second time, then rolls her feet behind her, landing in a kneeling position beside Pantera, pulling her head out of the headscissors, and going for a lateral press...

1...

 

Kickout!

 

Both get to their knees and dive in for a clinch lock-up (collar only). Pantera uses that to go into a headlock. Molly reaches out for anything, trying to get the crowd behind her. She then steps on the back of Combatienta's knee, forcing it to bend and for her to go down to one knee. That makes it easy for Molly to then squeeze her head out and apply a headlock of her own. Pantera wiggles her head around, trying to escape from the headlock. She gets her head out, and goes to a waistlock. She cranks it in, trying to take the air out of Molly. Molly gets her hands in between Pantera's and goes for a standing switch...but Pantera's one step ahead, and pivots to take Molly down with a waistlock takedown instead.

 

COACH

Pantera's got veteran instincts; she's one step ahead.

 

Pantera holds Molly down in the referee's position (waistlock with defensive opponent on all fours). She grabs Molly from the inside leg as she grabs a half-nelson to turn Molly over and into a lateral press...

1...

 

 

Kickout!

 

Pantera stays on top of Molly, as Molly keeps her arm up in the air. Pantera grabs the arm with one hand and tries forcing it back down to the mat. Molly tries to raise her other arm, but Pantera grabs it with both arms and goes into a grounded armbar. Molly can't get her arm out, so she tries standing up. Combatienta goes with the flow, coming up with the armbar intact. Pantera then twists around and goes behind for a reverse hammerlock. Pantera cranks in on the hold, as Molly looks like she can't get out. So, Combatienta goes for a chinlock, possibly trying to convert it to a cross-face chicken wing. But, she leans in too far and lets go too much of the hammerlock, allowing Molly to twist around, drop down to her knees, and bring her down with a fireman's carry takedown, right into an armbar!

 

COLE

You can tell Molly's learning just from being in there with someone so experienced.

Molly switches her grip to grabbing Pantera's hand, then pulls her up by it, going right into a British courting hold (arm barred underneath armpit). Pantera tries going for a front facelock, but Molly is able to not allow her to do so by cranking down on the courting hold. So, Pantera grabs Molly's head and slowly pushes it downward, using that to clinch Molly's head. Pantera then twists herself and Molly around, hooking the other arm and reversing the courting hold into a backslide....

 

...Molly rolls right out, but Pantera reaches right up and grabs a front facelock with a Kimura-lock (reverse hammerlock clutched from up front). Pantera pulls Molly up to her feet with it, then whips Molly over with it. Pantera goes right into a side headscissors with the arm in an armbar. Molly twists herself around, as Pantera keeps ahold of the arm. Molly goes for a one-armed headstand, but Pantera's once again one step ahead, hopping off of the mat to drop Molly on her head. Molly briefly goes limp, but gets right back to a kneeling position, as she has both arms back now. Molly goes back to the headstand while in the headscissors. Pantera goes for the hop head drop again, but this time, Molly pushes off of the mat and escapes to land on her feet just in time!

 

COACH

With youth comes quickness...

Pantera tries to kick at Molly, but Molly catches the leg and starts to crank on the ankle. She applies pressure to the ankle, but Combatienta turns herself over, putting her spare leg over Molly's head while doing so, then comes to a one-legged standing position, as her ankle's still being twisted. Pantera then grabs at Molly's hands until she's able to break the ankle twist and go into the wristlock, as the crowd applauds. Molly tries doing a roll to get out of the wristlock, but as soon as her back hits the mat, Pantera takes advantage and goes for a short arm-scissors! Molly tries to lock her hands together to keep her arm from being extended, but Pantera overpowers her and applies if fully!

 

COLE

So far, without a doubt, it's been Pantera Combatienta one step ahead of the game at every turn. Molly's trying, but there's only so much she can do compared to Pantera's experience.

 

Molly suffers as Pantera pulls on her arm. But, Molly finds a new gameplan, lifting up her far leg and scissoring Pantera's bottom leg. She forces Combatienta's legs apart with the legscissors, then turns Pantera over, putting herself in a kneeling position above Pantera and allowing herself to pull the arm out and apply a double chicken wing. Pantera tries to get to her feet to go for some sort of reversal, but Molly stays on top and keeps Pantera face-down on the mat. Molly then tries rolling the hold into a tiger bridge pin, but Pantera rolls right through and frees her arms, allowing her to pull Molly up with a standing side headlock.

 

CABOOSE

I'm just beggin' someone to poke an eye or hook an ear!

 

Molly's able to quickly pull her head out of the headlock while putting her leg out in front of Pantera's, using it to shove and trip her down. But, Pantera thinks on her back and grabs Molly's leg to trip her up and cause her to fall backwards. Pantera gets to her feet immediately with hold of both of Molly's heels, then grabs a thighlock (back of knee placed on shoulder and thigh pushed in with both hands). Molly tries to pull apart the grip on the thighlock with her own hand, but isn't strong enough to do so. So, she uses her free leg and wraps both legs together, forcing Pantera right into a hanging triangle choke, the pressure of which forces Pantera to break the thigh-hold. Pantera can't escape the hold, so she leans forward, pinning Molly's shoulders to the mat...

1...

 

Molly rolls a shoulder over, forcing Combatienta to the mat while keeping the triangle hold applied. Molly has to roll onto her stomach to keep the hold applied. Pantera's able to get to her knees and squeeze her head out of the hold, but can't get her arm out of the scissors. Molly applies more pressure to the arm, leaving Pantera no choice but to grab Molly and roll her into an Oklahoma Roll...

 

1...

 

 

T...

 

Molly throws a shoulder up, then re-applies an armscissors on Pantera's left arm. Combatienta leans forward again to pin Molly's shoulders to the mat...

 

1...

 

 

Molly rolls a shoulder up! Pantera cannot figure out what to do within this armscissors that she hasn't already done, so she tries rolling forward. That only hurts matters, as it allows Molly to apply a proper short armscissors. But, the flat-back position of Molly gives Pantera an opening, as she's able to roll backwards, forcing Molly on her stomach with Pantera in a kneeling position at her feet. Pantera pulls her arm out of the now-half-assed armscissors, and the luchadore applies an anklelock. Molly quickly starts some sort of a struggle forward, trying to get out of the hold. She even tries hopping on one foot to get forward, but can't. So, Molly does a jumping front roll to get out of it while kicking away Pantera's hands! But, she leaves her arm open when she lands, allowing Pantera to pull her up by it and go right to a side wristlock.

 

COACH

Looks like Pantera's sticking with the usual lucha libre strategy of attacking the arms to prevent the opponent from doing any quick submissions or pins.

 

Molly quickly rolls forward, then rolls back onto her back, followed by a kip-up, all to keep Pantera on her toes while applying the wristlock. As soon as Molly kips back onto her feet, she grabs on with her free hand and armdrags Combatienta over...but Pantera keeps ahold of the arm and comes back up with the side wristlock! Molly can't believe the reversal didn't succeed, but gets over it quickly, rolling backwards to try and untwist her wrist. Molly then turns herself around completely quickly, climbs up Combatienta's side with one leg and spins herself around with the other leg going over Pantera's head, landing in perfect position to reverse into a side wristlock of her own!

 

COLE

It took some effort, but Molly finally got out of the wristlock!

 

Pantera only takes a couple of seconds to recover, as she rolls onto her back and grabs onto Molly's hands with her own. Pantera kicks away Molly's far hand, then rolls backwards, coming up on her feet with Molly's arm twisted, then grabbing it into another side wristlock. Molly's can't figure out anything new to counter into another wristlock, so she grabs Pantera by the mask and pulls her in, hooking the head and rolling her into a small package...

1...

 

 

TW...Kickout!

 

Both wrestlers come to their feet immediately, and Molly goes right to a side headlock, using that to bring Combatienta over with a headlock takeover. But, Pantera quickly reverses with a side headscissors. Molly goes right to the front kneeling position, then rolls right through, getting her head out of the headscissors and going right back to the side headlock. Pantera grabs Molly in a side waistlock and rolls her as if she's going for the cradle pin reversal of the headlock. But, Pantera rolls Molly all of the way over and grabs a front facelock. Combatienta converts that into a side headlock for a side headlock takeover, but Molly reverses immediately with the side headscissors once again. Pantera goes right to the front kneeling position, grabs Molly's legs, and turns over to flip Molly on her stomach. Pantera rolls backwards and on top of Molly, hooks her legs, and locks in a cross-legged single-leg crab (Texas Cloverleaf w/out the arm in between the legs)! Pantera cranks back on the legs, and Molly can't figure out the reversal. So, she ends up crawling over and getting a rope break.

 

COACH

So far, this match has basically been Molly failing to play catch-up against Pantera's mat game and expertise.

 

COLE

It looks like the advanced chain wrestling by Pantera and running out of reversals got to Molly, and she had to stop the momentum with the rope break.

 

Combatienta backs off, as the crowd applauds the wrestling they've seen so far. Molly pulls herself up with the ropes, then shakes off her arm. Molly extends her hand, and Pantera shakes it. They then circle mid-ring again, trying to find any opening to go in on. Finally, they both go in on a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Pantera quickly uses it to go to a side headlock. As soon as Pantera can get full control of the headlock, she transitions right into a wristlock. A look of frustration comes over Molly's face, as this is the hold that's haunted her so far in the match. She grunts in pain, then goes for a low dropkick to Pantera's knee. Combatienta side-steps while keeping ahold of the arm, and grabs an armbar on the ground to keep Molly down.

 

CABOOSE

Molly's starting to form an aggresive streak...I dig it.

 

Pantera cranks in on the armbar, but not for long, as Molly gets her legs up and brings Pantera down in a side headscissors. Pantera struggles in the hold, then leans her body back and kips up, effectively escaping. Molly gets to her feet as soon as Pantera kips out, to avoid a standing attack. They quickly go into a Greco-Roman knucklelock, but Molly kicks away one of Combatienta's hands and twists around, going right into a top wristlock. Pantera only suffers for a moment, as she twists herself around and reverses into a top wristlock of her own, once again going after the targetted arm.

 

COLE

I think Combatienta's trying to teach Molly a lesson on how to handle herself when being out-skilled, but Molly isn't picking up on it just yet.

 

Molly tries unbending her arm with her free hand, but can't find the power to do so. So, she twists herself around, unbending and untwisting her arm, and goes into a rear waistlock, trying to squeeze the air out of Combatienta. Pantera reaches back for a headlock and latches on, but Molly lifts her up, looking to go for some sort of side suplex. Combatienta cranks in on the headlock, disorientating Molly long enough to reverse and bring her down with a headlock takeover. Pantera reaches back and grabs Molly's hurt arm, then lets go of the headlock and gets to her feet, stands up, and pulls Molly up by the arm. Pantera then locks in a standing Fuijiwara armbar. Molly gets punished with the hold briefly, then dives in and reverses with a single leg takedown! Molly gets up and applies a spinning toe hold, then ties both legs up in a "4" shape, sits to the side with it, and locks in a cravate!

 

COACH

What a hold! If she can stay with this, she could have found her ticket to victory!

 

Molly cranks on Pantera's neck with the cravate while applying pressure to the legs with the inverted figure four. Slowly, Combatienta is able to squeeze her head out of the cravate...but that allows Molly to lay back and apply more pressure on the Figure Four! Pantera quickly squiggles back and grabs the rope to force a break. Molly breaks the hold accordingly and gives Pantera room to get back up to her feet, as the crowd applauds the two competitors' back-and-forth wrestling once again.

 

COLE

Molly's finally starting to find an opening here...she came up with a move that even her veteran opponent couldn't counter, and I think that frustrates Pantera.

 

COACH

Let's see if Molly can use that frustration to her advantage.

Both circle around mid-ring for a second, until Pantera reaches out for Molly's target arm. She grabs the wrist, but Molly yanks it away successfully and continues circling. Pantera charges at Molly and they go into what looks more like a sumo clinch than anything else. Pantera and Molly quickly go back into the corner. Pantera keeps ahold of Molly, as the referee tries forcing a break with his count...

 

ONE!

TWO!

THREE!

 

Combatienta backs off of Molly...then slaps her right in the face! The crowd gasps, as Molly rubs her face where she got slapped...then reaches back and lets off a LOUD chop to Pantera's chest! Pantera grabs at her chest, then delivers an open-handed slap of her own! Molly shrugs it off and goes for another, but she makes the mistake of throwing with her bad arm, and Pantera capitzalizes by grabbing it and coming down with a Fujiwara armbar. Molly tries rolling out, but Pantera rolls with her. She keeps the hold on, as both are literally sitting side-by-side. Molly gets up to her feet and literally is yanking at her arm, trying to get it free. Finally, she decides to leap and roll over Pantera, with the momentum freeing her arm from the hold.

 

COLE

Things are picking up here!

 

Both are up, and they go right back to the sumo-like clinch. Molly gets the advantage and uses it to lift for a bodyslam. But, Combatienta floats behind and brings her back with a state roll/prawn hold pin...

 

1...

 

 

TW...Kickout!

 

Both competitors are up, and they go right into a collar-and-elbow lock-up. Molly gets the advantage and locks in a front facelock. Pantera tries lifting Molly up, most likely for a Northern Lights suplex, but Molly slides down her back and brings her over with a sunset flip....

 

 

BUT! Pantera rolls through, then grabs the legs and pulls off a jackknife cradle pin...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

BUFFER

The winner of fall one....Pantera Combaaaaatientaaaa!

 

COLE

Wow! Out of nowhere, Pantera Combatienta came with that pin!

 

CABOOSE

What happened was that the veteran luchadore let her younger opponent get a false sense of pride and advantage, allowing her to surprise her by taking the advantage back just like that *snaps fingers*! Shocked opponent plus good pinning combination usually equals a three count.

 

COACH

As our competitors go back to their corners for their thirty-second rest period, let us remind you that coming up, live on Pay-Per-View, August 28th, is Angleslam! The summer showcase for the best and the brightest that the OAOAST has to offer! That's Angleslam, August 28th! Be there, or be hexagonal! Back to the action...

 

The bell rings to signify the beginning of the second fall. Both competitors come out of their corners, and shake hands in mid-ring, calmed down from the flared tempers in the first fall. They circle around for a brief moment, then go into a collar-and-elbow lock-up. Pantera gets the advantage and tries for a wristlock, but Molly smartly rolls away, then rubs her hurt arm. Both wrestlers just look at one another for a moment, then start to circle for a second. They go right back into a collar-and-elbow tie-up, and Molly gets the advantage. She uses it to go for a headlock, but Pantera wriggles away, showing that her head and neck might have been affected by the facelock figure four combo. Pantera shakes her neck, then they circle around once again.

 

COLE

It looks as if both wrestlers have staked out targets on their opponents...

 

Both competitors dive in and go for a collar-and-elbow tie-up once again. Molly gets the advantage and brings Combatienta over with a snapmare, then turns her around and goes for a kneeling front facelock. But, Pantera once again squeezes her head out. Both wrestlers come to their feet and go right to yet another collar-and-elbow tie-up. Pantera's able to slink in and bring Molly over with an armdrag, but Molly rolls away into a corner to get away from a possible grounded armbar. Molly gets up, shaking off her arm, and both start circling mid-ring once again. They go into another collar and elbow tie-up. Molly uses it to apply a headlock, but is quickly shot off to the ropes by Combatienta. Pantera throws a clothesline, but Molly rolls under it to avoid it upon coming off of the ropes. Pantera turns around and walks right into a headlock takeover!

 

COACH

It seems like Molly really should be trying to keep the pace quick, since that's when she's able to get the upper hand because she's both quicker AND is wearing down Pantera cardio-wise with the head and neck-based attack.

 

Molly keeps the headlock cranked on the mat. Combatienta tries for the usual headscissors reversal...but Molly hooks the legs with her arm and cradles for a pin...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

Kickout!

 

Molly has to let go of the legs, but keeps ahold of the headlock, pulling Combatienta up to her feet with it. Pantera cannot squeeze her head out of it, so she lifts Molly for a side suplex. But, Molly flips over Pantera's shoulder and lands on her feet behind her opponent, going right back to the headlock. Pantera reaches back and tries shooting Molly off to the ropes, but Molly keeps ahold of her mask and pulls herself back in, trying to switch arms while re-applying the headlock. But, Combatienta ducks the arm and is able to lock in a reverse waistlock. Combatienta goes for a German suplex, but Molly blocks it with her leg. Pantera then changes her gameplan and locks in a half-nelson, applying pressure on Molly's left shoulder and hurt arm. Molly tries to directly yank her arm out but can't. However, she's able to go under and score a standing switch into a half-nelson of her own, which she immediately transitions by going under the arm and applying a cravate!

 

COACH

Molly's showing that, once she has a hook to hang her coat on, she's ready to go with the best.

Molly cranks down on the hold, twisting Pantera's head as far sideways as she can. Finally, Combatienta is able to step on the back of Molly's near knee, bending it and sending her down to one knee. Pantera's in position to easily yank her head out of the cravate, and does so. Pantera then grabs Molly's targetted arm and brings her down into a Fujiwara armbar on the mat! Molly reaches out, but sees that she's nowhere near the ropes. So, she tries a somersault roll to escape. But, Pantera slides her body the opposite direction as they were, allowing herself to keep ahold of the hurt arm while scissoring the far arm with her leg, and brings Molly over with an inverted crucifix pin...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly rolls out, but Pantera keeps ahold of the hurt arm upon rising to her feet, going right into a British courting hold. Molly is in increasing pain, so she tries an escape by lifting Pantera and going for a bodyslam...but Combatienta keeps ahold of the arm and pulls Molly down to the mat, right into a grounded armbar. Molly can't escape, so she rolls her legs back, trying to grab some sort of a headscissors to bring Pantera over into an inverted victory roll. But, Pantera has it scouted and lets go of the armbar to hook the legs under her armpits and into a cradle...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera immediately grabs Molly's arm and pulls her up to her feet by it. Pantera then twists Molly's arm and goes into a top wristlock/hammerlock. Molly struggles in the hold, as she goes down to one knee. She then does a forward roll, loosening Combatienta's grip on the hammerlock, and leaps up as soon as she gets to her feet, bringing Pantera over with a hurricanrana! Pantera rolls up to her feet and charges at Molly, but gets sent down with a drop toe hold! Molly hops out in front of Combatienta and pulls her up with a headlock.

 

COLE

It looks like momentum's turning once again.

 

Molly quickly switches the headlock to a front facelock to alleviate her hurt arm somewhat. Molly cranks on the hold for a second, then tries to go for a suplex. She gets Pantera half-way up, but Combatienta is able to reverse by locking in a bodyscissors, rolling Molly forward to a sitting position while keeping the bodyscissors intact, and applying a Kimura-lock (reverse hammerlock while in front of opponent). Molly's completely stuck in this hybrid hold, so she has no choice but to roll over to her stomach, putting Combatienta under her in a pinning predicament...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera rolls back over, keeping ahold of the bodyscissors and Kimura-lock while having Molly on her back. Molly is in an inescapable hold, which leaves her no choice but to push herself to a seated position with her free hand and roll back over to pin Pantera's shoulders on the mat...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera turns Molly back over, but gives up on the bodyscissors Kimura-lock, transitioning right into a short-arm-scissors. Molly's already been victim of this hold in this match, so she's able to figure out a creative escape. Molly bridges her body upward, then walks her feet around, bringing Molly to a front kneeling position on the opposite side of Pantera, breaking the arm-scissors while being in position to hook the leg and go into a lateral press...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both competitors come to their feet right after the kickout, as Molly's able to grab Pantera's head and force it down, putting her in position for some sort of powerbomb. She lifts Combatienta, but Pantera escapes and lands on her feet in front of Molly. Combatienta then kicks Molly in the stomach and goes for a powerbomb of her own. But, as Molly's lifted, she's able to shift her weight and grab Pantera's arm, and reverses with an armdrag! Both wrestlers roll to their feet, and Molly charges at Pantera. She leaps and grabs Pantera's head, then swings around in mid-air and brings her over with an incredible tornado snapmare!

 

COACH

Physics would argue with what I just saw actually existing!

 

Pantera comes right back to her feet and runs into a big hiptoss! As soon as Pantera hits the mat, Molly leaps up and comes back down with a legdrop! She goes for the cover...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera rolls to the floor, practically admitting that Molly's offense is starting to get to her. Molly sees what's happening, charges, and nails an awesome tope con hilo (flip dive over top rope) onto Combatienta! The crowd cheers loudly, as Molly pops up to her feet, clutching her hurt arm to her side while grabbing Pantera and tossing her back into the ring with the other. She stops briefly to acknoledge the cheering crowd, then climbs onto the apron. Pantera's back up on her feet, in a bent position. So, Molly comes into the ring and goes for a running swinging neckbreaker. However, Combatienta was playing possum, as she's able to twist all of the way around and reverse it with a backslide...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera gets to her feet first, and connects with a LOUD low dropkick to the face of a kneeling Molly! Combatienta pulls Molly up to her feet, wrings her arm, then pulls her right into a shoulder tackle that sends her down to the mat. Pantera keeps ahold of the arm and pulls Molly up by it, then sends her off to the ropes with an Irish whip. Molly comes off of the ropes and gets sent back down with a jumping shoulderblock by Pantera. Combatienta pulls Molly up and forces her into a corner. Pantera then steps back and connects with a hard karate kick to Molly's shoulder on her hurt arm. Pantera reaches back with her foot, then delivers a second one. Pantera twists the arm in a wristlock, then sends Molly hard to the other corner with an Irish whip...only Molly charges in awkwardly and goes shoulder-first into the top turnbuckle!

 

COLE

Ouch!

 

Pantera walks over and pulls Molly up. She hammerlocks Molly's arm behind her back, then lifts her and brings her down with a backbreaker, slamming all of her weight down on her arm. Combatienta straightens the arm completely out on the mat, then does a headstand on it, applying all of the pressure of her body weight down on it. She even moves her head around slightly to torture the elbow joint. Finally, Molly starts slapping Pantera in the back, trying to knock her off. The slaps seem ineffective, so Molly rolls her legs back, wrapping them around Combatienta in a bodyscissors, and brings her down to the mat with it! Molly keeps the bodyscissors on and tries for a rear naked choke, but her weakened arm and an attempt by Pantera to break it won't allow her to apply it well. Molly ends up just going for the bodyscissors, as Pantera rolls over. Combatienta then tilts her upper body, and goes into a full-blown headstand as Molly keeps the bodyscissors applied while on her stomach. Pantera then pops out of bodyscissors and back onto her feet!

 

COACH

We went from one of the most unique predicaments I've seen in a wrestling ring to one of the more unique escapes...

 

Both women come back to their feet, as Pantera grabs Molly's arm, twists it once again, then brings her down with a single-arm DDT. Pantera immediately hammerlocks the arm behind Molly's back, then does a rolling bridge while holding onto the arm, locking in a bridging hammerlock. Molly reaches her hand out, trying to reach for a rope break. But, she's nowhere near. The pain starts to increase, as Molly holds her hand up. It seems as if she's debating whether or not to tap out and give the match up two falls to none...

 

COACH

This could be it!

 

A small chant starts...

 

"MOLLY!"

"MOLLY!"

 

Molly keeps her hand up...and places it firmly back on the mat! She pushes up with it, and comes up to one knee as Pantera keeps the hammerlock applied overhead. Molly slowly comes up to her feet. When she does, Pantera goes behind her and tries to keep a reverse hammerlock applied. As soon as she grabs it, Molly sees the near-by ropes, leaps on the middle rope with both feet, then flips behind Pantera to escape! She lands on her feet behind her opponent, then grabs Pantera in a waistlock and rolls her back into a state roll/prawn hold pin...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly immediately leaps to the second hold, holding her arm to her side. Pantera rolls to her feet, and Molly leaps at her. Molly grabs Combatienta's head and goes for a tornado DDT...but gets caught and tossed to the ground face-first by Pantera! Combatienta pulls Molly up, hooks her in a pumphandle, then lifts her upside down and drives her down with a shoulderbreaker on the bad arm! Pantera pulls Molly up and sends her off to the ropes with an Irish whip. She grabs Molly on the way back and hits a backflip Japanese armdrag, then lays out the arm and comes down on it with a standing senton!

 

COACH

What fluid movement!

 

Pantera pulls Molly up yet again, hammerlocks the arm behind Molly's back, and hits an STO, driving Molly's weight down on her own arm. She goes for the cover...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Pantera immediately pulls up Molly, with her body language giving away that she's frustrated that she hasn't finished Molly off yet. Combatienta holds out Molly's arm, then delivers a stiff European uppercut to the lower bicep. Pantera then slides her thumb across her throat to signal that it's "over". She whips Molly into a near-by corner, then backs up. Combatienta then does a cartwheel, then two back handsprings, leaping around to do some sort of avalanche in the corner to Molly...but Molly moves! Pantera goes face-first into the ringpost and stumbles back, falling to the mat! The crowd comes to their feet, as Molly stumbles around, holding her arm. She zones in on Pantera, who is down and not moving on the mat. Molly walks over, turns Pantera on her stomach, then grabs her near arm, goes through the La Magistal motions, then she hooks the far arm under her right arm, rolls for the pin, and hooks the near leg with her far leg...

 

COLE

Operation Pinfall!

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

BUFFER

The winner of your second fall, now at one fall apiece...."Floggin'" Mollllllly MAAAAAATHEEEEWS!

 

The crowd loudly applauds as Molly crawls backwards and back to her corner, all while clutching her arm to her side. The referee shakes Pantera, trying to wake her up. Combatienta comes to all fours slowly, as the blow to her head temporarily knocked her out. The referee asks her if she's able to go on, and Pantera excitedly yells "YES!" The referee sends her back to her corner as the rest period continues...

 

COLE

She's very lucky that the blow wasn't more serious...it looked like her head ricocheted off of that ringpost!

 

COACH

Wait...I'm getting something in my headset...it looks like we'll get an official word next week on THIS very program regarding the status of the OAOAST World Women's Title, and its vacancy.

 

CABOOSE

That'll be a blockbuster...

 

The bell rings, and it's time for fall number three. Pantera charges at Molly and throws a clothesline. But, Molly rolls under the arm to avoid it. Molly comes back to her feet, and Combatienta throws another clothesline...but Molly rolls under that one too! Molly's back on her feet and shoves Pantera's head down, flipping over her to bring her over with a sunset flip...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both wrestlers come back to their feet, and Pantera throws a forearm. But, Molly ducks under it, going behind and hooking both arms to bring Combatienta over with a backslide...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both competitors come up, and Molly immediately brings Pantera down into a small package...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both are back up, and Molly brings Combatienta back down again with a hurricanrana into a cradle...

 

ONE!

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly gets up before Pantera and is able to get a sunset flip as she's bent over...but Combatienta rolls through and rolls herself forward for a jackknife pin...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

Molly bridges upward, keeping ahold of Pantera's upper torso. She then twists it around into a backslide, but Lucha rolls right out. Both are up, and Molly floats over Pantera's leg to bring her over with a schoolboy...

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Both come up again, and Molly leaps to wrap her legs around Pantera for a wheelbarrow that she rolls into an inverted victory roll..

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly charges at Pantera, but she gets sent off to the ropes with a bi paso. Molly comes off of the ropes and Pantera lifts her for a tilt-a-whirl slam. But, Molly reverses with an armdrag! Both roll to their feet and Molly throws a superkick. Pantera catches the foot and spins Molly around, but she uses the momentum to leap up upon the full spin and bring Pantera over with a flying headscissors takedown. Pantera gets up dazed, as Molly charges at her. Pantera ducks down and backdrops Molly over the top rope, but Molly lands on her feet on the apron. Molly climbs to the top rope, Pantera turns around, and Molly hits a flying bodypress from above..but Pantera rolls through, then locks in a short arm-scissors!

 

COLE

This could be it!

 

Molly frantically tries with all of her will to reach out to the ropes as soon as the hold's locked in. She has to drag Pantera's weight with her, causing her to move slowly. She inches and crawls to the ropes...but stops right before she gets to them. It looks as if she can't move on, but the crowd gets together with a rhythmic clap to get behind Molly...giving her the energy to reach out and grab the ropes! The crowd cheers, as Pantera lets go of the hold and pulls Molly up to her feet. Pantera goes for a suplex, but Molly is able to slip out behind her opponent, hooks her head, and hits a reverse DDT/Russian legsweep combo takedown! Molly goes for the pin...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Molly pulls Pantera up and sends her off to the ropes with an Irish whip. Combatienta comes off of the ropes and gets lifted for a tilt-a-whirl into a tombstone...but Pantera is able to shift her weight sideways and reverse the move by coming down on her feet and lifting Molly for a tombstone of her own..and dropping her on her head with it! Pantera goes for the cover...

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!

 

Combatienta pounds the mat in frustration, then pulls Molly up slowly. She points up in the sky, then down at the ground to signify that she's dumping Molly on the ground. She positions Molly for a powerbomb, lifts her, and runs for a Running Liger Bomb...but Molly reverses with a hurricanrana that sends Pantera face-first into the middle turnbuckle! Pantera's down, as Molly struggles to get up...and all of a sudden, Valerie runs down the aisle and leaps onto the apron to distract the referee!

 

COACH

What's the meaning of this?!

 

Suddenly, Constance comes out of the crowd and jumps the rail! She slides into the ring and grabs Molly from behind! She hooks Molly's arms, lifts her while hooking her legs inward....and spikes her on her head with the Package Piledriver! Constance grabs Pantera and drags her on top of Molly, then leaps out of the ring and goes under the ring. Valerie drops down to the floor, as the referee turns around and goes for the cover..

 

ONE!

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

THREE!

 

 

BUFFER

Your winner, two falls to one....PANTERRRAAA COMBATIENTAAAAA!

 

Both of the Minnesota Angels climb into the ring and get ahold of Pantera. They stomp her, then Valerie pulls her up and hooks her in a pumphandle...the V-Spot (pumphandle lifted into piledriver)! They toss Pantera out of the ring, then grab Molly and toss her out of the ring. The crowd boos, as they were denied the ending of a technical wrestling clinic that they had been treated to and were intrigued by.

 

CABOOSE

THAT is how you handle yourself in a wreslting ring, not all this rolly-polly, nice-person stuff!

 

Valerie and Constance stand mid-ring and mockingly blow out kisses and wave at the booing fans. V&C give each other a high-five, then leave the ring, spitting on Molly while walking away.

 

COLE

This whole ordeal was uncalled for! We had one heck of a bout here, and I know this could have ended up being one hell of a boost for the career of Molly Matthews...but these "Angels" had to come out and ruin it!

 

COACH

I hope they get their just dues!

 

CABOOSE

Whatever...just like these fans and myself, those two got bored with this "friendly technical wrestling match" and decided to do something about it!

 

COLE

Your ass must hurt...you sure do talk out of it a lot! Hopefully justice is served in this situation soon...more HD in three!

 

Stephen Joseph is getting some coffee at the OAOAST Employees Only CoffeeTable aka ...

 

Col%20Com%20Starbucks%20Area.jpg

 

SJ

Hmm..A little cream, HEY, We're out of milk. Where's the damn milk? Anyone got milk?

 

::A shadow forms behind Stephen Joseph. He gulps and turns around...::

 

BROCK AUSSTIN

Half n Half?

 

A very relieved Stephen Joseph thanks Brock, who leaves.

 

Stephen Joseph

::Looks Right, Looks Left::

It's just milk...

 

And SJ walks off to the right, revealing right behind him...

 

staringcow.gif

 

Commercial break

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As we return to Baltimore, the crowd rises to their feet as HOLLY-WOOD & LOGAN MANN appear onstage, aruging. Synth tries playing peacemaker to no avail. Logan grabs Holly's arm, begging her to return backstage, but she frees herself from his grip and continues marching to the ring, ignoring the words coming out of his mouth.

 

COLE

We know Holly asked for some interview time tonight, and I can only imagine the toll the past 4 days have taken on her personal and professional relationship with the Heavenly Rockers. Everyone who caught License to Pin live on pay-per-view saw a woman hop over the security railing and throw paint, which was contained inside a cup, in Holly's face. As Logan attended to his girlfriend, Narcissistic Ned nailed him from behind with the 90210 enzurigi. We don't know who this woman was, except that she was charged with disorderly conduct and released on bail. And if that wasn't enough, guys, I've been told her records -- mugshot, police report, ect. -- were "mistakenly destroyed" hours after bail.

 

COACH

They're an embarrassment to the union, M.C.

 

COLE

Canada isn't apart of the United States, Coach.

 

COACH

After what you just reported, I'm glad they're not. Freeloading Canadians.

 

COLE

There's something really corny about the whole situation, that's for sure.

 

Holly grabs the microphone from Michael Buffer.

 

HOLLY

This has got to stop, and it has to stop now! I can't live like this anymore! The past 8 months have been pure hell for me physically and emotionally. I've experienced both heartache and just recently the gift of love from my friendship with Logan blossoming...

 

COACH

Blossom?! Whoa!

 

COLE

About two people picked up on that reference.

 

HOLLY (CONT'D)

...into love. And it's because of that love that I'm willing to risk everything for this nightmare to finally end. So, Ned, bring your self-serving, self-centered, self-righteous, narcissistic ass out here right now. There's something I want to say to you, asshole!

 

"YEEEEAAAAHHHH!"

 

CABOOSE

Apparently she didn't get the word we're no longer on pay-per-view.

 

Holly paces, waiting for Ned to appear.

 

The crowd BOOS as Narcissistic Ned steps out onto the rampway, a smug look on his face. Sarcastic Simon and Jim Cornette there for moral support.

 

"ASS-HOLE!"

"ASS-HOLE!"

"ASS-HOLE!"

 

CORNETTE

If you morons don't shut up, you won't get the pleasure of seeing an athlete currently performing at his highest possible level without the aid of performance enhancers.

 

"BOOOOOOOOOO!"

 

NED

Holly, it's never been my intention to cause you pain. You talk about how the past 8 months have been hell for you; it's been the same way for me. Every night I dream of us strolling down the beach holding hands and kissing like true lovebirds. It's said "love conquers all." Well, I'm ready to conquer because I love you, honey bunny.

 

HOLLY

How dare you say that you love me, you bastard! How could a man who supposedly loves a woman beat her up and put her life through misery on worldwide television? You're a voyeur, Ned. You don't love me. All you want to do is...(pointing at BUTT)...hit this and leave like you did to Krista 5 years ago.

 

NED

Well, okay, maybe I don't love you love you, but I do want to conquer you. I've wanted to since the first day we met last year. Now, I admit, I did some pretty rough stuff to you earlier this year, but it's only because I read in FHM Magazine that you liked it a bit rough. You like it when your lover pulls on your hair and talks dirty to you. I like it when my woman digs her fingernails into my back, singing a heavenly chorus as Dick Johnson sings in the rain.

 

HOLLY

What a piece of work you are, Ned. You've been putting me and the my I love through hell just because I turned you down. That's sad. But like I said, I'm willing to risk everything to end this once and for all. So I tell you what. You want to conquer me, Ned? You what to...(pointing at her BUTT)..."hit" this?

 

Ned smiles, nodding.

 

HOLLY

(pushing Logan away)

No, Logan, I gotta do this. For us. For the band.

(to Ned)

What I propose -- ever heard of that word Logan? -- is a match next week. The Handsome Hustler versus...the Angel of Death.

 

COLE

What?! Holly's just challenge Narcissistic Ned to a match next week!

 

COACH

Well, she is a former Women's Champion.

 

HOLLY

You'll get your chance to "hit" it next week, stud. That is, if you can beat me on-on-one. But if I win, then you'll agree to leave me and the Heavenly Rockers alone forever.

 

Logan crotches, placing his hands in his face. Simon and Jim are just as shocked as Logan and the rest of the crowd.

 

NED

(laughing)

Wait a minute. So you're saying if I beat you, you'll sleep with me?

 

HOLLY

Glad to know you can hear. Yeah, you heard me right.

 

NED

And you'd enjoy it, right? No crying or anything?

 

Holly falls backwards and spreads her legs, giving us a wonderful shot that would be censored on UPN.

 

COACH

PANTY SHOT~!

 

HOLLY

Hell, honey, not only would I enjoy it, but you can bang me in this very ring in front of a national television audience for all I care.

 

COLE

I think the FCC would have a problem with that.

 

NED

Get out of my dreams and into my bed. You're on, woman. I only ask of one thing, honey bunny. Come prepared because you're in store for the single greatest night of passion that'll make the hardest of hardcore movies look like softcore porn on Cinemax. Until next week, think of your Neddy Bear. I know I'll be thinking of you.

 

Narcissistic Ned and Logan have a super INTENSE~ staredown. Holly gets in front of Logan and hugs him. He still can't believe what Holly has done.

 

COLE

You heard it, fans. Next week -- Holly-Wood vs. Narcissistic Ned! If Ned wins, Holly will give her body to him.

 

COACH

I guess it's fair to say Holly's in for some...stiff...competition next week. Bwahahaha!

 

COLE

Oh, shut up!

 

CABOOSE

Tune in next week when the OAOAST turns into XPW.

 

(We pan to Calvin in his office and for the first time tonight, he's chillin' like a villian, yo. A janitor is emptying the countless ashtrays that were found in Calvin's desk.)

 

CALVIN

Finally, some time to just sit and relax. This job isn't *too* stressful so far.

 

(And because of Murphy's Law, the door swings open much to the chigrin of Calvin and in comes...Crystal?)

 

CRYSTAL

Hey, you're not Josie! When did this happen?

 

CALVIN

Way to pay attention to the programming Crystal. Hello, I'm Calvin Szechstein, you're new General Manager.

 

CRYSTAL

Yeah, yeah, whatever. I'm hear to talk about a vacation. You see, I have this, uh, great grandmother and she's ill...

 

CALVIN

This wouldn't happen to be the same "great grandmother" you've been "taking care of" for the past month, is it? Because according to these papers Josie left behind, you've been gone for a month on a PAID vacation. Quite frankly Crystal, for a so-called Upstart, you don't seem very motivated to show up the Originals. In fact, ever since 2005 hit, you pretty much have been slacking off. Maybe Josie didn't notice, but I sure as hell have.

 

CRYSTAL

Slacking off? You're talking to the Female Phenom here!

 

CALVIN

Uh huh. Well, I never really bought into your hype, and I'm not about to now. And another thing...

 

(Calvin's would-be rant is interrupted by the door being swung open again, but instead of a snobby, slacking female wrestler, it's the X Champion, Peter Knight!)

 

PK

I know you gave me two weeks off Calvin, but I don't need it. I was to defend my X Title tonight! None of this resting crap!

 

"YEAHHHH!"

 

CALVIN

Peter, you know I can't let you go out there tonight after that brutal match up you had on Sunday. But hey, if you're feeling up to it, I'll let you go next week, in a match of your choice.

 

CRYSTAL

WHAT?!?

 

(Both PK and Calvin turn their attentions to Crystal, a bit confused at the sudden outburst.)

 

CRYSTAL

You just give him what he wants on a silver platter? Talk about biases! That's not fair!

 

CALVIN

You on vacation doesn't help this show at all Crystal, although it would certainly make my job a hell of a lot easier. Knight wrestling, he helps this show.

 

CRYSTAL (scoffing)

Yeah, right. This never-will-be?

 

PK

Better than being washed up after 2 and a half years in the company. And since the only time we ever met is when you were stalking me to win that 24/7 title 2 years ago, why don't we have ourselves a little matchup next week, huh?

 

CALVIN

Hey, I like it. Advertised matches are money. It's booked!

 

CRYSTAL

Uh, fine! I need a tune up match after taking some time off anyways! Oh, and just like I took that 24/7 title away from you, I'm going to take that precious X-Title of yours too!

 

(Crystal storms off of the office, huffing and puffing as Peter turns to Calvin.)

 

PK

Women.

 

CALVIN

Tell me about it. At least you won't have to deal with her week in and week out.

 

JANITOR

Or will he?

 

CALVIN

Will you get the hell out of here already?

 

The janitor, who has a name tag that reads "Lee Mazzilli", hangs his head and steps out the door.

 

(A shaky, home camera recorder cuts to a bar, which we see Brodie in there, making her way through the crowd. Of course, since most are OAOAST fans, they part to the side for her in case she feels like randomly killing them. The camera makes its way towards where Brodie is sitting at the bar and the person filming persumingly sits besides her.)

 

BRODIE

You got my money?

 

(The camera nods, and after a moment of shaking, a gloved hand produces a plain, white envelope. Brodie immediately opens it up, counts what's in it and gives an approving nod.)

 

BRODIE

Good doin' business with ya. Oh, and when everyone finds out who you are, they are goin' to freak.

 

(And with a final laugh, Brodie gets up and leave as the camera is suddenly turned off.)

 

COLE

Just disgusting!

 

(It seems that Ashley Street agrees with Cole's assessment, as the AngleTron shows her shaking her head in disgust.)

 

COACH

Ashley obviously feeling the disgust at her friend getting nearly life-threatening injuries for a mere $7500. Our hopes and prayers are with Jenny and her recovery.

 

Josh Matthews stands backstage with Alfdogg.

 

JOSH

I'm standing backstage with Alfdogg. Tonight, he gets a shot at Hoff for the #1 contendership at AngleSlam. You must be VERY excited, Alf.

 

ALF

Well of course, Josh. But you know what I'm even more excited about? I'm excited to find out just who our new commissioner is going to be tonight. Whoever it is will get to watch, on his very first night on the job, Alfdogg etch his name in stone as the Main Event at AngleSlam.

 

*crowd boos*

 

ALF

And I'm gonna do it right here, in Baltimore, Maryland. *mixed reaction* You know, if I had a nickel for every legendary athlete to come through this town, I'd have...a nickel!

 

*crowd boos*

 

ALF

You know, 'cause I'm here tonight.

 

JOSH

Gotcha.

 

ALF

You know, these people should be respectful of that fact, instead, they choose to disrespect me. What the hell is wrong with these people?

 

JOSH

Perhaps these people don't agree with you philosophies.

 

ALF

What are my "philosophies", Josh?

 

JOSH

Well, I'm sure some of these people remember how you cheated to win your OAOAST World title some three years ago.

 

ALF

*rolls eyes* Since when did cheating become so unacceptable in Baltimore?

 

*LOUD boos from the crowd*

 

ALF

You know, I always have hated Baltimore. That's the thing I'm NOT excited about, is that my biggest night since my return has to fall in this shithole. I mean, what's wrong with these people...A guy can get away with MURDER and become the crowd favorite, yet they choose to shit on me? Their running back is in prison AS WE SPEAK, for God's sake! They'll take him back, too. And they wonder why the Colts left this place?

 

*The booing intensifies with every sentence*

 

ALF

But enough about these people, I'm embarassed that I spent so much time talking about these people. I want to talk about Hoff tonight. You know, this morning as I had my breakfast, some cereal, a little juice...that would be grapefruit juice, not the kind that Rafael Palmeiro has in the morning, mind you...

 

*crowd REALLY lets Alf have it*

 

...I was thinking about Hoff's recent success here in the OAOAST. And I hear him run his mouth about the future, and use his move, the "Future" Shock. Well, let me tell you something, Hoff.

 

*Alf grabs the mic from Josh and gets closer to the camera.*

 

And I hope Axel is listening, too, because you're next, son. You guys may be the "future" of the OAOAST...but you're about ready to get slapped in the face with a dose of the PRESENT, courtesy of Alfdogg. And while the so-called "legends" fart around in their battle with your "future", I'll be looking down, watching, laughing, from my rightful spot in the OAOAST throne, as World champion.

 

*Alf slowly lowers the mic from his face and we fade out at he stares grinning into the camera.*

 

Commercial break

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RECORDED AFTER LICENSE TO PIN

 

Jesse "The Body" Ventura stands outside the dressing room of The Original Elite, a microphone in his right hand. Chattering in the background. Various personnel coming and going. Along comes Tony Brannigan, drenched in sweat and holding the back of his neck from the Pollycutter he took. Jesse sees him coming his way and gets ready.

 

BYSTANDER

Great match, Ton'.

 

TONY

I lost, idiot!

 

Ventura is stunned when Tony brushes him off, instead going right into the dressing room. He goes right for CWM.

 

TONY

(shoves CWM)

CWM, you son of a bitch! You cost me the World Title. You cost me the World Title!!!

 

CWM remains claim, letting his fellow T.O.E. member vent. OAOAST officials quickly arrive and keep the two apart.

 

Brannigan is taken out of the room, still shouting and saying some naughty words that are bleeped. CWM just looks on,

 

COLE

We're back live on TSM, and what incredible footage shot after License to Pin. The Original Elite breaking up in front of our very eyes.

 

CABOOSE

Good riddance!

 

COACH

Just before License to Pin the Elite signed for a World Tag Team Title match for sometime this month. What does this it mean for that?

 

COLE

I'm sure we'll find out as time passes.

 

*GOOOOONG!*

 

COACH

Uh-Oh!

 

"YEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!"

 

 

"GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!

GET DOWN, GET DOWN!"

 

As Kool and the Gang's "Jungle Boogie" hits in the arena, Leon Rodez makes his way through the sliding doors of sliding doom. The usual jig and smile aren't present however, as Rodez limps gingerly down the aisle favouring his back as result of the Ultimate X Match at License 2 Pin. Jovial or not, the fans cheer him anyway, as he makes his way up the ring steps, entering the ring and calling for a microphone. Michael Buffer obliges, to a smile and a wink from The New-Age Love Machine.

 

RODEZ

Whassup?

 

COACH

YO~1

 

RODEZ

Alright, as you can probably tell, I'm not out here to wrestle tonight. After License 2 Pin, I'm still pretty beat up. Still...at least it isn't last year. See, last year at License 2 Pin...well, the show kinda sucked for the mostpart. Ironically enough though, it was from License 2 Pin 2004 onwards that my career changed. I went from getting destroyed by Drek Stone in that stupid Deathmatch Tournament...to becoming what you see before you today. One of the most entertaining superstar on the OAOAST roster today, even if I do say so myself.

 

"YEEEEEEEAAAAHHHHH!"

 

RODEZ

From License 2 Pin 2004 onwards, I stepped up my game. It started with Angleslam, taking on Drek Stone. Dirty Deeds, I was in the Gauntlet Match. Then, World Without End, I won the X-Division Title from The Blurricane. Climax, it was The Mad Cappa. At Anglepalooza, I was involved in a fourway match with Panther, Chris Bryte and Zack Malibu. Chris Stevens at Zero Hour. Another fourway at Anglemania IV. On I rolled to Living Anglelously, Last Man Dancing with The 70s Dude. And then, Ultimate X on Sunday night at License 2 Pin. And in that space on one year, those matches on Pay Per View, they all had ONE thing in common...

 

Rodez smiles.

 

RODEZ

They all...stole...the show!

 

"YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!"

 

COLE

He does have a point. You're always guaranteed a great match with Leon Rodez.

 

CABOOSE

Matter of opinion.

 

RODEZ

See, I've been earning some plaudits from different people here and there for putting on good matches on Pay Per View, great matches on Pay Per View and sometimes some pretty fantastic matches on Pay Per View. But, with all due respect...I'm not here for an ego boost. I'm not here to wave my *beep* around and say 'Hey, look how big my *beep* is!'. I did that in my old job, I don't need to do that anymore.

 

CABOOSE

Too much information.

 

RODEZ

I'd be lying if I came out here and said I'm happy with my performance at Ultimate X. People around the world, when License 2 Pin was over, were talking about that match more than any other. But am I happy about that? No. Because I'm out here and I'm beltless. And THAT'S what matters. I went out, gave 100% and of that I can be proud...but in the end, I could care less, because Peter Knight is the X-Division Champion and I'm not.

 

Head hanging, Rodez sighs.

 

RODEZ

So, to be honest, I don't really want to dwell on Ultimate X all that much. Yeah, it was a great match. Yeah, we did lots of cool flippy stuff and dropped each on our heads oh my godz~! But instead of dwelling in the past, I'd rather talk about the future. About next month. About who The Showstealer is going to have another Showstealing match with at Angleslam. Well, I'm not sure what our esteemed new General Manager has planned for moi, but I'm going to go over everyone's heads and I'm going to do something so unheard of, it boggles the mind. I am...*deep breathes*...okay, I can do this...it's okay, calm yourself Leon, be in the zone not around the zone...okay, here we go...I am...going to organise myself a match that the OAOAST might actually be able to advertise more than a week before a Pay Per View!!

 

"YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHH!"

 

RODEZ

Leon Rodez, in a Pay Per View match that hasn't been thrown together at the last minute!?! CRAZY TALK, I hear you cry! Well, it's true. Because I've got something in mind. What I have in mind...is to settle something that's needed settling for a while now. That being a match, one on one, at Angleslam, with Leon Rodez taking on...Christian Wright.

 

COLE

WOW! Now, there's a challenge!

 

COACH

You're not kidding! That's a huge challenge!

 

RODEZ

I've waited around for too long, let Christian Wright screw me around for too long. See, being the guy that I am, revenge and retribution seemed to slowly dissappear into the back of my mind in the days I was left on the shelf. After Living Anglelously, I was ready to tear Wright limb from limb. By the time I had come back, 'Nice Guy Rodez' mode had kicked in and when I finally had the chance to do some damage to Wright, I sprayed him with some silly string, threw a pie in his face and left it at that. Being the guy that I am, Christian Wright got away with what he did. But during the Ultimate X Match, something happened. Something woke me up. I finally got a taste of facing Christian Wright. And now, one 450 Splash doesn't seem enough. Now, I've finally woken myself up and I want to get my hands on Christian Wright finally. So, at Angleslam, I want Christian Wright one on one. No taglines, no add-ons, no gimmicks. Just me. And Wright. Man to man. To settle this once and for all.

 

Rodez pauses for a moment.

 

RODEZ

Sooner or later, the challenge is going to filter back to you and I'll be waiting for an answer. In the meantime, I'm gonna go out, I'm gonna party and I'm gonna get myself a little preparation. Because, once The New Age Love Machine gets going tonight, I can guarantee you, he's going to be Slamming the ladies...from all Angles!

 

Tossing the microphone away, Rodez smiles away as he begins to leave the ring, saluting the crowd and acknowledging the cheers around him.

 

 

(cut to backstage)

 

Watching on a backstage monitor, Jade Rodez swells with pride as she watches her brother leave the ring. Even going so far as to applaude him, smiling away as the picture on the screen continues to follow Leon up the ramp. Meanwhile, as Jade continues to watch on, two shadows appear behind her and the sound of snickering. Confused, Jade turns around wondering where the noise is coming from, finding herself face to face with Valerie and Constance, The Minnesota Angels.

 

CONSTANCE

Hey, look Val, it's Jade Rodez.

 

VALERIE

So it is. And judging from the clothes, being a whore must run in the family. Hey, if you're looking for customers, then there are plenty of street corners you could be hanging around on, instead of using a public place of work.

 

Jade growls at The Angels under her breath, trying to keep her temper.

 

JADE

Do you want something, besides a slap?

 

VALERIE

(faking fear) OOOOOOHHH!

 

CONSTANCE

Pretty tough words, considering you can't back them up. Speaking of which, how's the training going?

 

VALERIE

I'd be surprised if she could even hit an armdrag yet, Connie. Then again, I'd be surprised if she could walk and chew gum at the same time. *laughs*

 

*high-five*

 

CONSTANCE

Good one Val.

 

JADE

Yeah, 'good-one Val'. For your information, I'm doing just just fine...I know the basics already. See, when Leon first got started, I took up some training and that was two years ago. So I'm well ahead of schedule. And as far as not being able to back up my words? I know your type. You're the 'popular kids'. You walk around, picking fun at people, laughing away in your little clique like you're something special. Listen girls...I dealt with mouthy little bitches like you in high school all the time. If you're not careful, I'll deal with you two.

 

The Angels look at each other in disbelief.

 

VALERIE

You're kidding me, right?

 

CONSTANCE

She's not serious.

 

VALERIE

She can't be.

 

CONSTANCE

You seriously think that you could 'deal' with us? Talk about delusional. Let me fill you on on something, missy. I've been in this business for a few years too. Only difference is, I didn't give up at the first sign of a discarded pizza box. Me and Val have worked too hard for too long to let some little jumped up whore walk into the OAOAST and get paid because her brother's famous. Face it, that's the only reason you're here. If not for that, you'd be at a checkout somewhere running our groceries through.

 

VALERIE

If you think we're scared of some trainee, just because he brother used to be something special, you can think again. We're the top female tag team in America. We're respected ATHLETES! We will NOT...be disrespected by some reject from a Michigan brothel!

 

The Angels look about ready to pounce on the outnumbered Jade, when suddenly, Leon Rodez walks over, standing beside her sister. Val and Constance recoil slightly, not looking quite so anxious to attack anymore.

 

LEON

Problem?

 

CONSTANCE

What a surprise. As soon as there's trouble, little Jadey hides behind her brother. Word of advice, Jade. If you ever graduate from the academy and some how get your wrestling license...learn to stand on your own two feet. Because you won't have 'Big Bro' to fight your battles for you.

 

JADE

I can fight my own battles just fine. Infact, if you two aren't busy next week, maybe I can fight them then. The Minnesota Angels versus me and a partner. How does that sound?

 

CONSTANCE

A FEMALE partner...you can't pick your brother. We're not going intergender...

 

Leon wipes his hand across his chin, looking The Angels up and down.

 

LEON

Pity.

 

Flustered, The Angels think about attacked again...but think better of it again.

 

VALERIE

Alright, bitch. We'll see you and whoever you can find in the ring next week!

 

CONSTANCE

You'd better hope you can find a good partner, because you're in WAY over your head. WAY over!

 

As The Minnesota Angels storm off, Jade watches on with a snarling look on her face. Beside her, Leon smiles, wrapping an arm around his little sister's shoulders.

 

LEON

First match, eh? Aw, my little sis is growing up.

 

JADE

*laughs* Shut up!

 

LEON

C'mon, I think we're done here tonight. Let's go grab a pizza or something, I'm starving.

 

Once again, we go to the back.

 

WALL

I can't believe he's the new General Manager! I hate him!

 

Stephen Joseph

How dare they overlook me? ME! I should have been chosen. I'll see to it at the next board meeting.

 

Wall

Uhh, SJ?

 

Stephen Joseph

Yes.

 

Wall

What's 1400 pounds and pissed off?

 

Stephen Joseph

Oh. Shit.

 

::He slowly turns around::

 

mad%20cow%20eatmorechicken.jpg

 

Wall! It's just Cal's product placement team. The Chick-Fil-A Cows! Hey guys!

 

Cows

MOO!

 

SJ and Wall turn back around and walk away, but somewhere, down that hallway, four eyes follow them out.

 

Farmer Jim

Don't worry baby. He's scared. We'll get him next week...

 

CABOOSE

.....I don't believe this.

 

Commercial break

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*CALIFORNIA LOVEEEEEE!!!*

 

COLE

Hey! Hey! We have a surprise guest!

 

“California Love” by Dr. Dre and 2Pac starts playing while the crowd pops loudly, expecting The Parka to arrive at any minute. After a few seconds, the entrance doors slide open, and…. someone who isn’t The Parka comes out. The crowd still cheers for a few seconds, but they soon realize that the man in the La Parka mask isn’t really Leroy Andrew Parka. How can they tell? Because the man in the La Parka mask is wearing a hubcap from the El Camino around his neck!

 

COACH

Why do I get the feeling that I know who is wearing that mask?

 

“The Parka” plays to the crowd, who shower him with boos. It should be noted that the man in the Parka mask is wearing a black dress shirt, a $500 Rolex watch, black dress pants, and black dress shoes, which is what a certain Lightning Crew member usually wears. ”Parka” “raises the roof”, and then slides into the ring, acting like he is a mascot for a college football team for some reason, and then leaps onto a turnbuckle. A single spotlight shines on him. “The Parka” poses on the turnbuckle, and then pulls off his mask revealing…VITAMIN X!

 

CABOOSE

HA! He got you didn’t he?

 

COLE (groans)

Caboose, I wasn’t fooled at all!

 

CABOOSE

Yeah right. You thought Parka would come out as soon as you heard his song!

 

Vitamin X stands in the ring, soaking in the boos from the crowd with a smirk on his face. “California Love” continues playing while X grabs a microphone.

 

COLE

Vitamin X defeated The Parka last Sunday at License To Pin in an impromptu brawl. X stole one of the hubcaps from the El Camino, and has been parading around with it ever since.

 

COACH

It’s like the hubcap is his trophy for beating The Parka!

 

CABOOSE

Vitamin X certainly deserves a trophy for beating an OAOAST legend. He said he would make a name for himself, and I’m sure he did that last Sunday at License To Pin! I mean think about it. Parka is a former Tag Team Champion. One half of the Dream Machines, one of the greatest tag teams in OAOAST history. And in his first match back in a long time, he got pinned by the Financial Consultant for The Lightning Crew! I mean that’s got to make The Parka feel even worse!

 

COLE

We don’t know where Parka is. All we know is that Parka was infact NOT 100% when he took on Vitamin X.

 

CABOOSE

He couldn’t beat X even if he was 100% anyway!

 

The lights have gone back in the arena. “California Love” by 2Pac and Dr. Dre has died down. Vitamin X stands in the ring with a mic. He has put the hubcap on a turnbuckle, and is holding the La Parka mask. The crowd boos, but Vitamin X just smiles.

 

VITAMIN X

So, I fooled you all, didn’t I?

 

CROWD

BOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

 

COLE

X didn’t fool anybody!

 

CABOOSE

Oh now, I wouldn’t say that.

 

VITAMIN X

Well, I had to do it, since there’s NO CHANCE IN HELL The Parka himself will ever again come to the ring to that song. You know why? Because at License To Pin, this past Sunday, I sent Parka back to the retirement home where he belongs!

 

The crowd boos. Caboose claps.

 

VITAMIN X

I am known by many names. Vitamin X. X. Sexy X-y. The Financial Consultant for The Lightning Crew, and The Lightning Crew’s Official play-by-play and interview man. Last Sunday at License To Pin, I earned another name. Legend. Killer! Because I will go down in the record books as the man who destroyed the legendary Leroy Andrew Parka!

 

CABOOSE

Oh yeah! You tell it like it, X! Way to go!

 

VITAMIN X (CONT’D)

Parka thought he could take me. He thought that just because he was a former OAOAST Tag Team Champion, he could beat me. He thought that just because he competed in an unforgettable Glass Tables Match two years ago at The Great Angle Bash, that he could beat me. He thought that just because he was a member of The Dream Machines, he could beat me.

 

Vitamin X looks directly into the camera.

 

VITAMIN X

Well, Parka. I. PROVED. YOU. WRONG!!!

 

BOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

 

X

I said that people would know who I was. I said I would become a singles superstar come hell or high water. After what I did to Parka, I guess I can safely say “Mission: Accomplished!” HA! HA! HA! HA!

 

COLE

This is disgusting.

 

X

And folks, this is only the beginning. Because starting now, the era of Vitamin X begins. You are looking at the next X-Division Champion, the next Tag Team Champion, the next Heartland Champion, the next 24/7 Champion—oh wait, forget that one. Hell, I’ll even dress up as woman and go after the Women’s Title! Just call me Xtina!

 

CABOOSE

HA!

 

COLE (sarcastically)

Ha. Ha.

 

VITAMIN X

The point is that I will win every single title in the OAOAST, including the World Heavyweight Title! I will show each and every one of you that Vitamin X is one of the greatest of all time, and it’ll happen, because like it or not, Vitamin X is going to be around forever, unlike The Parka!

 

The crowd boos. Chants of “PAR-KA! PAR-KA! PAR-KA! PAR-KA!” are heard, which visibly annoys X.

 

COLE

These fans want to see The Parka!

 

COACH

I bet they want Parka to shut X up right now!

 

VITAMIN X

Chant “Parka!” all you want. I can guarantee you that he is not here tonight. (Crowd boos). He’s not on HeldDOWN~! tonight, and infact, he won’t be on HeldDOWN~! ever again! The Parka is GONE from the OAOAST FOREVER!

 

COACH

Oh come on!

 

The crowd doesn’t like that AT ALL.

 

VITAMIN X

That’s right, Leroy Andrew Parka is gone from the OAOAST, and you can thank ME for that!

 

X looks at Parka’s mask, almost as if he is in a trance.

 

VITAMIN X

Yes. It was me! It was ME who ended Parka’s career for good! I didn’t need Tha Puerto Rican. I didn’t need The Lightning Crew. I did it by myself! I have sent Parka back to the gutter where he belongs! Never again will Leroy Andrew Parka step foot in an OAOAST ring! You heard me right, as of July 31, 2005; the career of The Parka…has ENDED! Case closed, throw in the towel, turn off the lights, the party’s over!

 

Vitamin X looks directly into the camera. He has a sinister look on his face as the camera does a close-up.

 

VITAMIN X

Parka, I know you’re watching this. You’re probably at some run down bar drinking your 15th beer of the night as I’m speaking right now. Well, I have just one last thing to say to you. How does it feel to have your career ended by me? How does it feel that your career was ended by one of PRL’s “lackeys”? You think that I respect you now? You think that I’ll say that you put one up one hell of a fight? You think that I’ll bow down to the legend that is The Parka like everyone else in this damn promotion does? Well guess what? I SPIT IN THE FACE of the legendary Parka! Parka, you are NOTHING! You do NOT intimidate me! I am not scared of you! You are nothing but GARBAGE! This is what I think of you!

 

Vitamin X rips the La Parka mask in half, and holds it in front of the camera.

 

VITAMIN X

YOU’RE FINISHED PARKA! You are HISTORY! And it is all because of me! Because I am THAT much better than YOU! The Parka’s career is DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAD! DEAD!!!

 

Vitamin X spits on the ripped La Parka mask, and throws it down on the mat, stomping on it. He drops his mic, and takes the hubcap from the El Camino. Vitamin X exits the ring with the hubcap around his neck again, and walks up the ramp, the crowd booing loudly. The camera does a close-up of the ripped, stomped, and spit on La Parka mask.

 

(FADE OUT)

 

It was a night of action, drama, suspense, and some really cool spots.

 

L2PCUBE.jpg

 

If you missed it live, catch the replay all week long. Call your cable or sattelite provider now!

 

We cut from the previous exciting scene to view Dan Black, already in the ring, wearing his wrestling gear of short, black and white halved trunks with black boots. Black has a mic.

 

BLACK

I hope you'll forgive my impromptu appearance, and I also hope you'll forgive my attire. Ordinarily, of course, I would wear a suit to address you all, but tonight - well, let's face it. This little speech will get interrupted, and I probably will have to get my hands dirty. So I'll make this brief. At Licence To Pin, you saw me make a mistake. I know - not something you'd expect of me. Not something I expect of myself. But I can admit to it. I wanted to beat Zack Malibu, and I wanted it so badly.

 

And guess what? I did it. I gave him a BlackOut from the very top rope - I hurt him bad. I pinned him. I had help to do it, but that didn't matter to me. And you know, maybe it should have. Because as soon as that match was over, Drek Stone and the GPX laid me out as good as Malibu. I didn't expect or want friendship or allegiance. Just men who hated Malibu as much as me. And I wouldn't have thought I could hate anyone more. I was wrong again. God knows Black T has always been at the throats of GPX, but at least in the past you could, in some strange way, respect their athleticism. Now all they do is moan and cry about their position in the company. And as for Stone, I...

 

Dan stops as Drek Stone and the GPX predictably appear at the top of the stage. Stone has the mic, but waits for the backlash to die out, sneering at the fans who dare boo his arrival.

 

DREK

Dan my man, for such a smart fellow, you just don't get it, do you? This goes deeper than just Malibu, deeper than just one man. Is he the focal point of our mission? Sure, and why wouldn't he be? He's the face of this company, the face of a generation that should have been phased out long ago. Things haven't exactly progressed naturally, and that's why the GPX and I have begun carving out a path into the future. Think of us as landscapers, yanking out the weeds so that the flowers can bloom.

 

BLACK

You know what, you said it yourself. I'm a smart man. So why not can the crap. Enough with the metaphors and analogies and the history lessons, Stone. My back's not turned to you now. I'm not gullible tonight. We might not be on the same page, but I dare you to set foot in the same ring!

 

Drek snarls, and the GPX start to storm past, but he extends his arms and holds them back. Stone then walks slowly, leading the pack, as the crowd gets worked up over the potential encounter. The trio advance on the ring, and Black shrugs coolly, awaiting their arrival. GPX slide in as Black backs up, but not down. Drek walks in between the two and stands toe to toe with Dan. Stone pauses a moment, then nods his head, and all three leap on Black! Dan shoves Static away and lands a right hand on Jackson, but Drek floors him with a flurry of blows and the trio stomp Dan down.

 

COLE

Foolish pride has gotten the best of Dan Black, as we're getting a recap of License To Pin right...waitaminute!

 

The crowd comes alive, as the former World Champion TONY BRANNIGAN~! comes racing out from the back, still decked out in a suit, only as he hits the ring two individuals hop the railing, one on each side, and block his path.

 

CABOOSE

What the hell are they doing out here?

 

COLE

What part do they have in this?

 

Christian Wright and Beohemoth are the two men in question, and Tony looks at them for all of a millisecond before drilling Wright with a right hand, then trying to get the big man out of his way, and failing! A huge forearm is brought down on Tony's back, dropping him to all fours, and Wright follows up with a soccer kick, while in the ring the GPX hold Dan Black by his arms, leaving him wide open for Drek to hit some vicious body shots and squeeze Dan's jaw, telling him off.

 

COACH

I can't believe I'm gonna say this, but Black T needs some help!

 

COLE

Now who on Earth would want to help these tw...WHAT?

 

CABOOSE

The answer's got me as surprised as you, Mikey!

 

The fans ROAR as the Franchise himself, ZACK MALIBU, comes racing down the aisle, directly into a spear into Beheomoth, driving the big man into the ring apron! As he reels, Malibu steps back and delivers a running kick that strikes him low, taking him off his game, while Brannigan is on his feet and drilling Christian Wright with right hands! Malibu slides into the ring and Stone turns around at the wrong moment, coming face to face with his hated enemy, who has been ducking him ever since Malibu dared him to take him on face to face! Stone turns white, then turns and runs, throwing Johnny Jax in his path as he dives out of the ring and out to ringside, going into the crowd to get away from the carnage! Malibu ducks a lariat from Jax and comes up, looking for a SCHOOL'S OUT, but Jax bails out in the nick of time. On the other side of the ring, Black gets the better of Static and clotheslines him over the top, sending him to the floor, and one of HeldDOWN's most surreal sites takes place, as Zack Malibu and Dan Black are on the same page, clearing the ring of Drek Stone's "uprising"!

 

COLE

Now THIS is a Kodak moment, because it'll never...WAIT, see!

 

As Zack backs up, Black spins him around, and now the two longtime rivals are face to face! Black and Zack exchange words, until Tony hits the ring and seperates the two, causing a tense moment between all three!

 

CABOOSE

Did...did Brannigan just break them up?

 

As the original members of The Original Elite all stare each other down, an uneasy feeling in the pits of their stomachs, Drek and his crew regroup in the aisleway, with the GPX, helping their equally worn cohorts, Wright and Bo. Flustered but not defeated, Drek picks up the mic he left at the top of the ramp.

 

DREK

Hey, you...Malibu, Black, Brannigan...we warned you. We told you it would come to this. Look here, look at us. Five strong and counting, while your ego's can't even handle each other. The time is upon us...you cannot resist our existence! You can't fight fate, Malibu! You can't do it!

 

Drek, getting heated, drops the mic and starts walking back down the aisle, and an eager Malibu slides out of the ring and starts moving up the aisle to meet him halfway, until Drek changes his mind and backsteps, waving a finger "no". Malibu fumes, standing still, and behind him comes Brannigan, who seems to be backing him up!

 

COLE

This is amazing! Tony Brannigan, after everything he and Zack went through earlier this year, are side by side!

 

CABOOSE

Yeah, but look at Black! He's not too happy with this turn of events.

 

Black remains in the ring, looking on as Drek and his gang disappear behind the curtains. He exits the ring, and Zack and Tony are in the aisle, still untrusting of the other, while Black storms past, right through them. Brannigan grabs his partner by the shoulder, trying to get him to ease up, but Black shrugs it off and turns around, staring angrily at his partner, then turning his head and staring coldly at Zack. The eyes of the three men shift around before Black simply turns and walks off. Brannigan then turns back to Zack and stares him down again, takes a deep breath, and then walks off, following his partner to the back.

 

COLE

This is an incredibly tense situation for all involved. Drek Stone seems to have found more supporters for this cause of his, while the veterans can't seem to move past fighting each other.

 

CABOOSE

Drek Stone knows that the OAOAST is ripe for the picking right now, and my fellow Originals need to heed these words: they know what they're doing. They can't be taken lightly. However, the greatest enemy right now isn't Drek Stone, the GPX, or anyone in this group of is. Their greatest enemy is themselves, and the sooner that battle is won, the better, because otherwise this company is going to change for the worst.

 

COLE

Alfdogg challenges Hoff for a shot at the title at AngleSlam, NEXT!

 

Commercial break

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The cameras cut to a shot of Triple C at ringside, manning Sofa Central as only they can.

 

COLE

Fans, it has been a wild night here on HeldDown. We've learned that we have a new General Manager, and that he is CALVIN SZECHSTEIN--

 

CABOOSE

And Boss, I hope you got that fruit basket I sent in.

 

COLE

Wait, how did you already send him a welcoming present?

 

CABOOSE

I have my ways.

 

COLE

In any event, it has been an eventful night, and we are all set to cap it off with a fantastic main event. Hoff, the number one contender, defending his AngleSlam title shot against the OAOAST Heartland Champion, Alfdogg.

 

COACH

Aw, yeah, playas. This is gonna be a hot one. These two guys are red-hot right now, and you know they're gonna tear the house down.

 

COLE

Absolutely, two of the hottest, winningest superstars in recent weeks. Hoff of course won the Battlebowl event to win his title shot, and since then he has defended that chance against any and all comers, and not only that, he's beaten each and every one of them.

 

COACH

Yeah, and meanwhile, Alfdogg won the then-Puerto Rican title from, well, tha Puerto Rican, renamed it the Heartland Title, and he's held onto it against challenger after challenger!

 

COLE

Both these guys had great nights last Sunday at License to Pin, both of them beating CSI members. Hoff over Brock Ausstin, and Alfdogg over Hoff's most notorious rival, Chris Stevens!

 

CABOOSE

Well, good for them.

 

COLE

And that brings us to tonight. Hoff, Alfdogg, the #1 contendership, and it starts....NOW!

 

Michael Buffer stands in the center of the ring, house mic in hand.

 

BUFFER

Ladies and gentlemen, it is now time for our MAAAAAAAAAAIN EVENT!!

 

The house lights go down as "The Wall" by Kansas hits the speakers, and the crowd lets out a good-sized cheer! The cheers grow louder as the OAOAST Heartland Champ, Alfdogg, steps onto the stage!

 

COLE

And there he is! The man with a golden opportunity!

 

Alf adjusts the Heartland Title belt on his shoulder, shining it with the palm of is hand before patting it. The champ grins cockily as he struts down the aisle.

 

COACH

These fans are feelin' Alfdogg here tonight!

 

COLE

Lately he's been winning over the crowd, slowly, week by week...plus, he probably has some goodwill left from defeating Chris Stevens on Sunday.

 

CABOOSE

The morons in this audience had the gall to boo my man, Chris Stevens, in that violent barbed wire ladder match. But hey, we could do worse than Alfdogg.

 

Alf climbs the ring steps and steps into the ring, holding his Heartland Championship over his head, showing it off for the crowd. Alf hands the title to referee Brian Hebner, who hands it to the timekeeper.

 

COLE

Well, Alf seems in high spirits, and hopefully that confidence will give him an edge in his match against, arguably, the hottest commodity in wrestling today.

 

CABOOSE

Oh, give it a rest, Cole.

 

"The Wall" fades as Alfdogg takes off his OAOAST Originals jersey, revealing the sleeveless white t-shirt underneath. The fans buzz during the ensuing moments of silence....

 

*BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM~!*

 

And then COME ALIVE as "Black" hits and onto the stage steps HOFF!!!

 

COLE

THERE HE IS!!

 

Hoff looks out over the fans, smiling and nodding his head before making his way down the aisle. The big man slaps the hands of the fans in the aisle, but keeps his gaze on the man in the ring.

 

COACH

And Mikey, I don't know if this man is the hottest commodity in wrestling, but he's damn sure the most popular!

 

CABOOSE

Bah. You know what? These fans don't know what's what. They boo athletes like Drek Stone, like Chris Stevens, and they cheer slugs like this. It sickens me.

 

Hoff slides into the ring, popping to one knee and looking hard into the eyes of Alfdogg. Alf raises an eyebrow, looking unimpressed by the #1 contender. Hoff gets to his feet, then turns, climbing the near corner. Flashbulbs light the air in the arena as Hoff throws his fist into the air, posing for the crowd. The big man steps off the ropes, then blows past Alfdogg, heading to the far corner and flexing his muscles to another round of flashbulbs.

 

COLE

Hoff has told us that he is in the best shape of his career, and I for one believe him. It's going to be a tough road for Alfdogg tonight.

 

CABOOSE

Yeah, but don't forget, Alfdogg has championship experience. He's a former World Champion himself. He's done everything Hoff has, and more. In fact, I think Hoff might be the one in for a long night.

 

Hoff hops off the ropes and meets Alfdogg in the center of the ring. The two men lock eyes, Hoff's focused gaze in stark contrast to Alf's self-assured grin.

 

BUFFER

This contest is scheduled for one fall, with TV time remaining, and it is for the OAOAST NUM-BER ONE CONTENDERSHIP!!! Introducing first, the challenger. Hailing from Anderson, Indiana, and weighing in at 240 pounds, he is an OAOAST Original, a legend in his own time, and a former Heavyweight Champion of the World. The reigning Heartland Champion, tonight he looks to earn the right to challenge Axel at AngleSlam on August 28th. Ladies and gentlemen.......ALFDOGG!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Alf turns to the crowd and holds his hands out, looking for applause. A few of the audience members jeer, but the majority give Alfdogg a round of applause.

 

BUFFER

And his opponent. From Minneapolis, Minnesota, and weighing in at 275 pounds. He is a former World Champion looking to regain his crown. Tonight, he defends his right to do so as if it were the title itself. The reigning and defending number-one contender......HE IS.....HOFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Hoff looks left, then right, raising his fist into the air to a massive ovation. Alfdogg lets out an arrogant laugh, shaking his head at the big man.

 

BUFFER

So, for the thousands in attendance tonight, and for the millions watching around the world.....LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLETS GET READY TO RUM-BLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLE!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Buffer exits the ring as Brian Hebner reads the instructions to both men. Contender and challenger both nod, prompting Hebner to ring the bell!

 

*ding ding ding ding ding*

 

COLE

Here we go!

 

The bell rings, but Hoff and Alf remain unmoving, staring at each other. Alf spits the wad of gum he was chewing out of the ring, then looks at Hoff, jutting out his chin. Alf turns the side of his face to Hoff, offering up a free shot. The fans boo, but Hoff crosses his arms, shaking his head.

 

CABOOSE

Aw, come on, ya wimp. Take the shot.

 

Hoff shrugs, prompting Alfdogg to scowl. Alf lowers his jaw, then shoves Hoff back! The big man's eyes flare as he stumbles back, then charges at Alf and tackles him to the mat!! The crowd goes wild as Hoff begins hammering the Heartland champ with big right hands!

 

COLE

There you go, Caboose! There's the shot Hoff was waiting for!

 

Alf crawls away from the big man, but Hoff gets to his feet and grabs his foe from behind! Hoff grabs an arm and whips Alf into the ropes. Alf comes back, and Hoff catches him with a shoulderblock that sends him to the canvas! Hoff falls on top of Alfdogg, and Hebner drops to his knees, but Alf kicks out before he can slap the mat. Both men get to their feet, and Hoff again grabs Alf by the arm, whipping him toward the ropes, but Alf reverses and Hoff hits the strands! The big man comes barrelling in, and Alf catches him with a HARD back elbow! Hoff's head snaps back, the impact sending Hoff crashing to the mat. Alf pounces, straddling Hoff's chest and laying in with some right hands of his own!

 

COACH

Alfdogg is one tough brawler, and it might be tough for Hoff to match fists with him!

 

Hoff covers, but the fists of Alf do their damage. Alf gets off of his foe, then measures him up before dropping a forearm across Hoff's face! The big man grabs his nose, and Alf hooks his leg for a cover! Hebner counts one, but that's all he gets before Hoff kicks out to a big pop!

 

COLE

Hoff powers out easily. Both men going for covers early on, maybe hoping to score a fluke pinfall!

 

CABOOSE

As far as I'm concerned, every win of Hoff's is a fluke.

 

COACH

Well if that's the case, he's on the biggest fluke streak I've seen in a while.

 

Alfdogg pulls the #1 contender up by the hair, throwing a few forearm shots to the bridge of Hoff's nose. The big man reels, and Alf throws him into the ropes! Hoff comes off the far side, and Alf throws a beautiful superkick, but Hoff catches the boot! Hoff spins the nacho-loving grappler around, grabbing him from behind and planting him with a back suplex! The fans cheer as Hoff rolls up to his feet, sizing up his foe before leaping into the air and dropping a leg across Alfdogg's throat! Hoff rolls over into a cover, ONE, TWO, and Alfdogg kicks out!!

 

CABOOSE

I'll say this much. One of Hoff's strongest points is his ability to act on the fly. It's not chain wrestling, per se, although we've seen him do that. It's ring generalship. He knows where he is, and acts accordingly.

 

Hoff, now, picks Alfdogg up by his long locks and drives a knee into his stomach. Alf doubles over, and Hoff grabs his neck, snapping him down with a swinging neckbreaker! The big man goes for another cover, Hebner counts, but again, Alfdogg is out at two.

 

COLE

Well we saw Hoff have some trouble with Brock Ausstin on Sunday, but so far, he has been in control here.

 

COACH

Well it's rare that Hoff sees somebody as powerful as he is in the ring. He's much more used to seeing these smaller, quicker athletes, and so he knows how to handle them, if ya feel me, playas.

 

Hoff climbs to his knees and pulls Alf's head up, applying the dreaded REAR CHINLOCK~! Hoff squeezes his arms, applying a lot of pressure, but Alf is able to fight up to his feet and throw an elbow to Hoff's gut! Hoff loses his grip, and Alf SMASHES his knee into Hoff's skull!! The crowd "ooohs" as the dull thud resonates throughout the arena, and Hoff falls onto his back. Alf walks over to Hoff, then turns to face the crowd....before delivering a STANDING MOONSAULT!!

 

COLE

WOW! What a move!

 

Alf hooks a leg as Hebner makes his count!

 

ONE!!

 

TWO!!

 

THR-NO!!! Hoff kicks out, and the fans applaud!

 

COACH

This match is kinda similar to the Hoff/Some Guy affair from a couple weeks ago, although the fans here seem to be giving Alfdogg more respect than they did to SG.

 

COLE

So far, both men putting on a clean, if hard-hitting, matchup.

 

Alfdogg, looking a bit miffed that the moonsault wasn't enough, pulls Hoff to his feet and throws a hard blow to Hoff's temple. Hoff stumbles away, resting in the corner, but Alf grabs him, pulls his arm back, and delivers a hard knee to Hoff's ribs! Hoff groans in pain as he doubles over, and Alf pushes him back up and does it again! The fans get on Alf a little bit as he smiles, enjoying the punishment he's laying on the #1 contender. Alf drives another knee into the ribs of Hoff, then pulls him out by the hair. Alf hooks Hoff by the head, grabs his waist, and brings him over with a snap suplex. Alf floats into a cover, and the official makes the count! ONE!! TWO!! KICKOUT!!

 

COLE

Almost got him right there!

 

CABOOSE

Alfdogg's got his momentum rolling, fellas.

 

Alfdogg pulls his opponent to his feet and hooks Hoff once more for a vertical suplex. Alf tries to lift the big man, but Hoff blocks it with his leg! Hoff throws a knee to Alf's gut, and another! The fans cheer, but the cheers turn sour as Alf lets go, rears back, and smashes Hoff with a huge headbutt! Hoff spins, reeling in pain!

 

COACH

Alfdogg is using his h--

 

CABOOSE

DON'T say it.

 

COACH

Yeah all right, but you know what I was gonna say.

 

Alf grabs Hoff--

 

COACH

ALF USED HIS HEAD LOLZ~!

 

CABOOSE

You SON OF A--

 

Caboose, on the sofa, tackles Coach as Alfdogg grabs Hoff by the back of the neck, snapping him down with a modified neck breaker! Alf gets to his feet and stalks around Hoff, grabbing the big man by the legs! The fans buzz as Alf steps through!

 

COLE

Alfdogg could be going for the Sharpshooter!

 

Alf crosses Hoff's legs as the big man struggles!! Alf leans to one side, trying to turn the big man onto his stomach, but Hoff resists! Alf tries to turn the other direction, but Hoff kicks him off! Alf bounces into the ropes and comes off, kicking at Hoff, but the big man rolls out of gthe way and gets to his feet! Alfdogg angrily grabs Hoff and shoves him into the corner, rifling off a knifedge chop--

 

"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"

 

--but Hoff grabs Alf and reverses, throwing him into the corner! The fans go wild as Hoff rears back and throws a big right hand, and another, and another! Hoff tears into Alf with big rights, then grabs his dazed foe and whips him corss-corner! Alf hits the far buckles hard, his back arching in pain....then gets SQUASHED with a Stinger Splash!

 

COLE

Stinger Splash! Hoff is rolling!!

 

Hoff backs out of the corner with a smile, and Alfdogg falls to the canvas! Hoff rolls him onto his back and hooks the leg!

 

ONE!!

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

NO!! Alfdogg throws a shoulder up!!

 

COLE

Hoff coming awfully close to retaining his contendership!

 

The big man pulls Alfdogg to his feet, then throws him into the ropes and catches him with a high back body drop-- NO!! Alf flips in midair and lands on his feet! Hoff turns around--right into an Alfdogg superkick!! The big man crashes to the mat, and Alf drops on top of him, hooking the leg!!

 

COLE

Will it be enough?

 

ONE!!

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

THRNO!!! Kickout!! The crowd lets out an audible sigh as Hoff throws his shoulder into the air.

 

COLE

Hoff just barely kicking out of that big superkick by Alfdogg!

 

Alf, looking exasperated, gets to his feet, waving Hoff up. The crowd throws Alf a few boos as Hoff slowly gets to his feet. Alf sneaks up behind him and hooks him in a full nelson, but Hoff slips his arms free and ducks behind Alf with a standing switch! Hoff hooks Alf with a rear waistlock and tosses him overhead with a German suplex! He holds the bridge! Hebner with the count!!

 

ONE!!

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

NO!!! Alfdogg throws a shoulder up, breaking the bridge!

 

COLE

So, so close!

 

Hoff rolls up to his feet and grabs Alf, pulling him up from behind! The #1 contender clubs Alf in the back of the neck, then grabs him from behind, hooking him in a rear facelock that sends the fans to their feet!

 

COACH

FUTURE SHOCK!

 

CABOOSE

Oh, no.

 

COLE

Hoff looking for the Future Shock! No need to say that if he hits this, it's all over!

 

CABOOSE

Then don't say it!

 

Hoff grabs Alf by the waistband of his pants and hauls him overhead...but Alf shifts his weight and lands behind Hoff!! Hoff turns, and Alf quickly grabs his arm and throws him into the ropes! Hoff comes off and Alf grabs him, spins him, and drops him in the center of the ring with a SPINEBUSTER!!

 

COLE

Shades of Arn Anderson!!

 

CABOOSE

And you know Hoff can't be happy with that!

 

Alf gets to his knees, then his feet as he looks down at Hoff....then turns his gaze to the corner! The fans again gets up as Alf heads to the apron!!

 

COACH

FIVE-STAR ALF SPLASH!!

 

COLE

Alf could be looking for his signature maneuver, that big, huge, high-impact Five-Star Alf Splash!!

 

The crowd actually cheers as Alf climbs up the ropes! Alfdogg stands to his full height...looks down at Hoff...and leaps! Flashbulbs again go off across the crowd as Alf delivers the Five-Star.....but Hoff lifts his boot and catches Alf in the FACE!!!!!

 

COLE

OH MY!!

 

The audience holds its breath as Alf's face plummets into the underside of Hoff's boot, stopping the splash before it can reach its target! Alf falls to the mat, dead weight, as Hoff lowers his foot to the mat.

 

COLE

Did Hoff ever dodge a bullet there!! Let's take one more look at it!

 

The SUPER SLO-MO replay shows Alf leaping off the top, pumping his arms and legs, and falling face-first onto Hoff's size 14. Meanwhile, in live action, Hoff climbs to his feet, stalking to Alfdogg's motionless body!

 

COACH

And Hoff is in complete control, fellas. Alfdogg may be out.

 

COLE

Let's see if Hoff goes for a cover here!

 

Hoff walks over to Alf and picks him up by the hair, grabbing him by the arm and whipping him toward the ropes....but Hoff hangs on, yanks Alf back in, and turns him INSIDE OUT with a short-arm clothesline!! Alf does a flip in midair before landing face-down on the canvas!! The fans cheer as Hoff slashes his arms, ROARING to the crowd!!

 

COLE

Hoff ready to put Alfdogg away here!!

 

Hoff stalks around Alfdogg, grabs the legend by the right leg...and LOCKS IN THE ANKLELOCK!!! Alf SCREAMS in pain as he hops on one foot, trying to get away, but Hoff pulls him away from the ropes and twists on the ankle!!

 

COLE

The anklelock applied! This has to be it!!

 

Hebner checks to see if Alfdogg wants to quit, but Alf shakes his head. Alf hops, trying to break free, but Hoff keeps the hold locked in! Alf stays up, though, and manages to reach the ropes!! Hebner starts his five count, but Alf lunges forward, diving over the top rope...and sending Hoff over and onto the arena floor!!!

 

COACH

DAYUM~!

 

Hoff lands HARD on the thin protective mats, back-first, reeling in pain. Alf pushes himself back into the ring, and the fans applaud as he shakes out his ankle.

 

COLE

Well you've got to admire Alfdogg's resillience, as well as his innovative counter to that hold! We'll see if he can capitalize here!

 

Hoff, slowly, gets to his feet. As he turns to face the ring, Alfdogg runs the ropes...and comes flying over the top with the SPACE FLYING TIGER DROP!! The fans go BANANA as Alf wipes Hoff out, as well as himself, the two men landing in a heap at ringside!!

 

"HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT! HO-LY SHIT!"

 

CABOOSE

Holy BLEEP, indeed.

 

COLE

What an amazing move by Alfdogg, completely flooring Hoff.

 

COACH

Yeah, Alfdogg may have banged himself up a little though! But this is still his best chance to put Hoff away and win that title shot!

 

Slwoly, slowly, Alfdogg gets to his feet and pulls Hoff up by the hair. The fans slap Alf on the back as he rolls Hoff into the ring, then takes off his shirt and tosses it into the crowd!

 

CABOOSE

Some lucky fan getting a souvenir.

 

COACH

Lucky? That shirt is covered in sweat and nacho stains!

 

COLE

Alfdogg looking for it all once again!!

 

Alf climbs onto the apron...then heads upstairs to another big pop!! Alf looks down, but Hoff makes it to his feet! In a daze, Hoff stumbles, then turns to face Alf! Alf leaps with a diving cross-body, but Hoff catches him and snaps him to the mat with a HUGE powerslam!!

 

COLE

WHAT A REVERSAL!!

 

Hoff hooks Alf's leg, and Henber makes the count!!

 

 

ONE!!!

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

KICKOUT!! Alf kicks out at the last second!! Hoff looks up, closing his eyes in exhaustion.

 

COLE

SO close! And now Hoff has to wonder what HE has to do to put Alf away!!

 

Hoff climbs to his feet, then grabs Alf by the hair! Pulling the former World Champ halfway up, Hoff screams "THIS IS IT!!" The fans pop as Hoff pulls Alf's head up and grabs him by the legs, lifting him for the SPINEBUSTER~.....but Alf elbows Hoff on the crown of his head!! Hoff drops Alf, doubling over, and Alf grabs the big man, hooking him for a PERFECT PLEX, but Hoff rolls him up with a SMALL PACKAGE!!

 

ONE!!

 

 

 

TWO!!

 

 

 

NO!!!! Alf kicks out! Both men find their feet, and Alf throws a wild clothesline-- ducked by Hoff!! Alf's momentum carries him around, and Hoff grabs him from behind with a rear facelock!! The fans EXPLODE!!!

 

COLE

COULD IT BE?!

 

Hoff, with another primal roar, lifts Alf up to the lights....holds him....HOLDS him......and DROPS him on his head with the FUTURE SHOCK!!!!!!!!

 

COLE

HE GOT IT!! HE GOT IT ALL!!

 

Hoff swings his legs free and rolls onto Alfdogg, hooking his leg!!

 

COLE

COVER!!

 

Hebner counts, and the fans count right along with!!

 

ONE!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

TWO!!!!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

THREE!!!!!!!!

 

*ding ding ding ding ding*

 

"Black" hits as the fans EXPLODE, and Hoff rolls off of Alf and to his knees!! Hoff raises both fists in triumph as Buffer reads the decision!!

 

BUFFER

The winner of this contest, and STILL number-one contender......HOFF!!!!!!!

 

Hoff gets to his feet, and Hebner raises his hand as the fans shower their hero in praise.

 

COACH

Score one more for the big man!

 

CABOOSE

Well, like it or not -- and I don't -- but Hoff busted his ass yet again to get the job done.

 

Hoff looks down at Alfdogg, nodding with a smile, before climbing onto the ropes and throwing his fist into the air once more.

 

COLE

Well it has been a wild, wild night here tonight, capped off with a wild main event, and yet again we ask ourselves the question. Can anyone...ANYONE...stop Hoff? Folks, for Caboose and the Coach, I'm Michael Cole, and we'll see you next week, right here, on HeldDOWN!!

 

The final scene closes on Hoff, the number one contender to the OAOAST World Title, lowering his arm and looking out across the fans, a smile on his face...

 

FADE TO BLACK

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Produced by:

KingPK (I didn't write anything, but I deserve a credit, DAMMIT!)

 

Written by:

Hoff

Alfdogg

Tony149

Ed Wood Caulfield

CanadianChick

Phoenix Fury Legdrop

King Cucaracha

Stephen Joseph

Mystery Eskimo

 

Copyright 2005 OAOAST Entertainment.

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