Phil schneider's workrate report

[Guest Brian]

What Worked

 

-I am no fan of 15 minute mike segments, but shit 15 minute mike segment built around Chris Benoit and Eddie Guerrerro will never get a complaint out of me. Eddie is so good at building past history into feuds, he did it when he came back from the car accident and got revenge on the LWO, he did it when he set up a mask match against El Hijo Del Santo in those Mike Tenay Lucha segments, when Santo wasn’t even working for WCW and here he refs the Radicalz, I half expected him to mention the 1995 TOSJ semi-final, or how he was always the bigger star in UWA.

 

-I enjoyed the couple of minutes of the mixed tag, according to CRZ someone from the WWE IP clicked through on my report last week, so let me again reiterate, the only sensible way for this Molly/Regal v. Trish feud to reconcile itself is to have Finlay defend his trainee. You give me Regal v. Finlay again I will promise to keep pimping those Nash mike segments, DVDVR is on the cutting edge, if anyone could make flooding jeans gansta Kev hip its us. Finlay for Nash, that is such a fair trade.

 

-Kevin Nash and X-Pac are the reincarnation of Scott La Rock and Big L. Man if you close your eyes it was like Frog and Rocket from Colors. I am a nightmare walkin, psychopath talkin, king of my jungle just a gangsta stalkin.

 

-Hey Bradshaw v. Big Show didn’t suck, the Big Show is on a rocket to the 480’s baby.

 

-The Undertaker mike bulling section sucked ass, but the Tommy Dreamer takes a beat down like no one else. Trust me Tommy it could be worse, if the other tall Texas lockeroom enforcer was hazing you, you would be drinking something way worse then tobacco juice.

 

-The best place for Eddie Guerrero and his problem with pain killers certainly isn’t playing Psicosis to RVD’s Rey Mysterio Sr., but fuck is he a great ladder match guy. That match was really, super great for a match with so much prop failure. Eddie kept it together, improving when the ladder wouldn’t fold, when drunken Canadian idiots ran in, when RVD lost his balance, the match kept wanting to fall apart and Eddie kept refusing to let it. The Powerbomb off the ladder, flatback ladder fall, and rolling senton where amazing spots, but the little stuff was even better, the super nasty back elbow, the intense beatdown in the corner. Eddie was just spot on. RVD did take a bump or two, but this was a virtuiouso one man show. Now I never want to see it again.

 

-Hey Dean, BENOIT IS ON RAW... HAHA enjoy the Rikishi

 

What Didn’t Work

 

-Hardy’s v. Booker T and X-Pac was sort of on my television. Jeff Hardy switches to the yellow bandana, clearly showing solidarity with beleaguered pop star R. Kelly, and siding with Micheal Hayes in his problems with the locker room. If I was X-Pac I wouldn’t want to wrestle someone using that type of semaphore.

-Bubba v. Chase Tatum was not nearly as good as the time Tatum wrestled Dave Taylor on WCWSN. They really need to bring back Swoll to carry him in tags.

 

-I don’t see what the heat on Goldust is about, I mean he is second generation NWO, that should count for something.

 

-I dig heelish Beniot but I fear that his appearance is going to lead to another shitty Austin beats two great wrestlers handicap match. The Nash pimping will stop unles s you give me a Eddie v. Austin PPV singles.

 

-I am watching RVD climb the obviously rickety ladder, and loudly calling for a ref to go over and steady the ladder, and useless Hebner didn’t do the professional thing, something I have seen Indy refs regularly do. RVD is lucky he didn’t Charlie Manson himself and Hebner is an embarrassment.

 

-I hope that stupid fuck who ran in a pushed the ladder off when Eddie was climbing it, got taken to a isolated room in back of the arena and got the Bradshaw treatment he richly deserved. Ross deserves some Bradshawing for selling it like “Anything can happen at RAW” rather then how Lawler treated it “Boy I hope Eddie dislocated that punks jaw.”