KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 LaLa plays over the opening video, again now chock-full of Upstarts goodness and we head into the home of the OAOAST's flagship program, the Palace in Auburn Hills, Michigan. While swooping over the crowd, the camera focuses on signs such as "I MICHAEL COLE We are two weeks away from AnglePalooza and this week, the OAOAST makes Michigan it's home for HeldDOWN~! Hello everyone, I'm Michael Cole along with, as always, Jonathan Coachman and Caboose and we have another great show in store for you tonight. We begin to wrap up the first round of the 2006 Anderson Cup with two more great matches! First, from the Los Infernales bracket, the 7th seeded South Central Militia faces off against the 2nd seed Thunderkid and Reject and then, from the MWC bracket, the 4th seed Christian Wright and Bohemoth go up against the 5th seeded newcomers, the Lonestar Gunslingers. COACH Also, a rematch from last week as The Parka puts up his X-Divsion championship against Otaku II and I'm CERTAIN Jamie O'Hara will keep his nose out of this match. Honest. CABOOSE Just like, if you make a move for my bat again, I CERTAINLY won't slap you past AngleMania. COLE Also, both Jumbo and Team Heyross, who will be in Anderson Cup action next week, will be in action tonight. And in our main event, Dan Black takes on Leon Rodez with the #30 spot on the line in the Lethal Rumble match.....that is, if Leon Rodez makes it to the arena on time tonight, as his flight has been delayed. If he doesn't make it, I guess we'll have to show some reruns of the SAG award-winning Cole's Bar. COACH It won a SAG award? CABOOSE He means a Shitty, Absolutely Gay award. COLE CABOOSE Resorting to emoticons? I've lost what little respect I had for you. Don't Believe the Hype hits and the South Central Militia makes their way through the curtains. COLE (sighing) But now we're set for another matchup in the Anderson Cup! Let's go to Michael Buffer! BUFFER The following is a first-round matchup in the Anderson Cup tag team tournament, scheduled for one fall! Introducing the first team, both hailing from Los Angeles, CA, at a total combined weight of 535 pounds...VINCENT FORD and MARCELLUS WALLACE, collectively known as the SSSSSSSSSSSSSOUTHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH CCCCCCCCCCCENTRALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL MMMMMMMMMMMILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTIAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! COLE And the South Central Militia set to take on Reject and Thunderkid, and earlier today, Josh Matthews sat down with Reject, and Reject said that TK reached out to him over the weekend, they had a long talk about this tournament and their recent problems, and they came to an understanding, and Reject said you're going to see that tonight against this team. COACH Well, that remains to be seen, Cole. What's the Difference: Prizefighter Remix hits and Reject and TK make their way out. BUFFER Their opponents, at a combined weight of 490 pounds...the team of THUNDERKID and RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREJECT!!!!! COLE Well, this is a good sign here, we saw last week these two entered the arena separately for that six-man tag match! TK and Reject get into the ring and high-ten one another, then Reject and Wallace step out of the ring. *DING DING DING* TK ties up with Ford, and Ford backs him up into a corner, then gives him a forearm to the chest. Ford pulls him over to the side of the ring, but TK reverses an Irish whip. TK, however, is taken down with a running shoulderblock by Ford! COACH And TK's not gonna doing no press slams or overhead throws in this match, Cole! These are two big guys he's in here with! TK circles the ring with Ford again, then ties up and takes down Ford with an armdrag! TK then hooks the arm on the mat. Ford comes up, then grabs a handful of hair to pull TK back to the ropes. Ford whips TK into the ropes, then drops down for a monkey flip, but TK sees it coming and drops a fist! Ford then comes to his feet holding his face, and TK hooks him and delivers an overhead belly-to-belly! COACH Okay... TK covers... 1... 2... Kickout! Ford gets to his feet quickly, but is taken down with another armdrag! This time, TK drags Ford over to his corner and tags Reject, who comes off the top rope and delivers a chop! Reject then takes over on the arm, hooking it behind the back of Ford, then grabbing the hand as he picks up Ford for a bodyslam! COLE Nice teamwork by TK and Reject here as they work over the arm of Vincent Ford! Reject delivers a snap legdrop, and covers... 1... 2..... Kickout! Reject goes to the ropes, but catches a knee from Wallace on the apron! Ford promptly tags his partner in, and they set up a double suplex on Reject. TK comes in, however, and catches him on the way over, and they hit stereo dropkicks! The SCM rolls out to the floor. COLE Well, the Militia had the advantage briefly, but they let it slip away! The SCM regroups, then Wallace slides back into the ring. Reject ducks a clothesline, and starts firing off kicks on Wallace! Reject climbs up onto the shoulders of Wallace by placing the left foot on Wallace's left knee and spinning around, then spins around again and takes Wallace down with a hurricanrana! Reject fires off right hands, then gets up and tags TK, who points to Reject and kicks his foot in the air, and the crowd responds with cheers. COACH Oh, no, I hope this isn't what I think! COLE Can TK hold him, though, is the question? This guy's 270 pounds! TK picks Wallace up and gets him up in the hangman's hold, and Reject walks around and delivers the BUZZSAW KICK~! to the midsection! Reject exits the ring, and TK delivers a vertical suplex on Wallace, floating over for the cover... 1... 2.... Kickout! TK tags Reject again, and they whip Wallace into the ropes, knocking him down with a double elbow! The referee forces TK out of the ring as Reject climbs onto the shoulders of Wallace again, but this time Wallace holds his ground long enough for Ford to come in, grab the head of Reject and jump over the top rope, guillotining Reject on the rope! COACH That'll turn the tide right there! Reject is hurt on the mat as Wallace delivers a falling headbutt! Wallace covers... 1.. 2... Kickout! Wallace delivers a one-armed bodyslam to Reject, then tags in Ford. Ford stomps Reject on the mat, then picks him up in a bearhug and drives him into the corner. Ford hammers him with right hands, then whips him HARD into the opposite corner, and Reject falls forward onto his stomach! COLE And Reject taking a REAL pounding in there! You'd have to call this an upset, I think, should the Militia win this match, considering the credentials of Thunderkid & Reject! COACH Yeah, but all their credentials are in singles wrestling, Cole! And I think that's why they've been having dissention since re-forming their team, I think they're both singles wrestlers at heart! Ford tags Wallace back in, and whips Reject to the ropes. Wallace comes in and catches Reject in a bearhug! COACH And we could see a submission right here, Cole! Reject's back has taken some punishment! Wallace wrenches back and forth, and Reject starts to go out! The referee raises his arm... 1!!!!!!!!!!! 2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Reject holds up on the third lift! Reject delivers a right hand! A second! A third! Reject takes both his arms back and brings them together across the head of Wallace, which finally breaks the hold! Reject backs into the ropes, and catches another knee, this time from Ford! Wallace hooks another submission hold, a full nelson, as TK comes into the ring, which distracts the referee. This allows Ford to go to the top rope, and come down...but Reject bends over, and Ford nails Wallace on the back with a forearm! Ford charges Reject and takes a thrust kick under the chin! Reject then rolls over and tags TK! COLE TAG IS MADE! TK comes in with a clothesline on Wallace! Clothesline on Ford! TK picks Ford up, and plants him with a gutwrench powerbomb! 1... 2...... Wallace saves! Reject climbs back into the ring, and catches Wallace with a dropkick! TK then grabs Reject by the arm, and whips him, and Reject hits Ford with a spinning wheel kick! They repeat the sequence on Wallace, then TK sets up Reject for the suplex, as Reject hooks Wallace's neck with his ankles, then TK spins and Reject takes Wallace over the top rope! Reject skins the cat back in, then he and TK hit a DOUBLE FLATLINER on Ford! Reject then runs over, and LEAPS over the top onto Wallace! COLE Reject FLYING to the outside, and Wallace is down! Meanwhile, in the ring, TK sets up Ford...and drills him with the THUNDERBOLT DDT~!!!!!11111 1... 2........ 3!!!!!!!!!!!! *DING DING DING* COLE And Reject was exactly right, a VERY impressive showing by Reject and TK, and they advance to the second round! BUFFER The winners of the match, advancing to the second round...the team of THUNDERKID and RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREJECT!!!!! God of Thunder hits as Reject and TK celebrate in the ring. CABOOSE If they've really gotten over their problems, this might be a team to watch to win it all. They'll have to wait until next week to see who they will face in the semis, however. COLE We'll be back with more in a bit. Commercial break Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 (We fade out of the last commercial and face into a tight face shot of Stephen Joseph) Crowd: Mixture of cheers and jeers. ::Stephen Joseph's nostrils tense up, then relax. He stares into the camera, calm, cool, collected:: Hi. ::He pauses:: It's a damn shame that I couldn't be in an OAOAST ring tonight, winning a match, pinning some unlucky opponent with my Finality. But, that wasn't my decision, it was Axel's. ::The crowd boos:: Axel, what you and Peter Knight did to me, I can never forgive. You made me look like a fool, but also did something else, something you didn't quit bargain for. ::The camera pans out a little bit, showing Stephen Joseph standing next to a lightpost in a black trenchcoat. It is dark outside:: Let me tell you what you didn't bargain for. It's very simple, really. When I was OAOAST Champion, I had a single purpose, a single vision. To STAY Champion, no matter the cost. It was with that vision that I returned to the OAOAST in August, and I went 55-0 in singles matches until New Year's Eve. 55 Wins, no losses. And then it became 55 and 1. Peter. Axel. When you beat me, you freed me. All that energy, all that passion I was keeping bottled up to keep the title on ME! The OAOAST title was a cork, if I was a champagne bottle. Now that's its gone, there's emotions, anger, and mad wrestling intensity just spewing forth. And its all directed at you two. January 29th. I'm coming for my title. Because if I don't get my title, I don't get relief. And I need that relief. If I don't my title back, then I don't have a title to focus on. ::Stephen Joseph pauses:: I would just have you. ::pause:: I didn't come all this way out here Peter Knight, to just give up the good fight, I came to rage against the dying of the light. I've looked onto what you fight for, here on this street, and that home ::Stephen Joseph points down the road:: I once had a family too. Two men took that away from me. Caused me to become unstable, unfit. If I don't get my title back, I'll do the very same damn thing to do. Anglepalooza Peter Knight. What choice are you going to make? ::A cell phone rings in Stephen Joseph's coat pocket:: You made a terrible decision crossing me Peter. You made a terrible decision trusting Axel, Peter. You crossed the devil, and the devil's gonna get his due. ::Stephen Joseph flips on the cell phone:: (to cell phone) Calvin? ::Fade to Black and back to Sofa Central:: COACH (in mocking tone) "Oh, the devil's gonna get his due." Let me tell you something Stephen, Peter Knight will make your ass say "I Quit" in two weeks if it takes all of us nailing you to a wall and doing every sick and sadistic thing we can think of until you utter those two words. COLE Geez, calm down Jonathan. We've seen that Stephen Joseph also has a dark streak of his own and I have no doubt he will bring it out a week from Sunday night. We cut to the back and into the office of GM Axel, where said GM sits at his desk. He looks up when he hears his door open and in steps the man himself, the OAOAST World Champion Peter Knight. AXEL How's it goin', mate? KNIGHT (chuckling) I'm just laughing at what I just heard from the "devil". Oooh, I'm in trrrroubbleeeeee now. AXEL Don't worry about a thing because we....I mean....you are going to rid this company of that cancer and then we can sit back and enjoy the Rumble, see which OAOAST Superstar is "lucky" enough to face you at AngleMania. KNIGHT Actually, that's why I came in. I've been watching some old tapes lately and I got an idea about how we can turn anyone that has any thoughts about helping Zack Malibu win the Rumble match. AXEL Lay it on me. KNIGHT (to cameraman as he kicks him out) Do you mind? Private buisness. (As the door closes) What's the one thing that would cause people to betray their loyalties? (Back to Sofa Central) COLE What the hell are those two planning now? Punishment by BIOHAZARD hits and Charlie Moss and Quentin Benjamin make their way to the ring. BUFFER The following tag team match is scheduled for one fall! Coming to the ring, at a combined weight of 481 pounds...CHARLIE MOSS and QUENTIN BENJAMIN, TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAMMMMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRRRRRRRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSS!!!!! COLE Team Heyross, undefeated since coming to the OAOAST, and two-thirds of the OAOAST Six-Man tag champs, ready for action on HeldDOWN~! COACH And this is a little warm-up for them as they prepare to meet The Love Doctors next week in the first round of the Anderson Cup! BUFFER Their opponents, at a total combined weight of 593 pounds...the team of JIM DANIELS and JACK BEAM!!!!! The jobbers raise their liquor bottles to the crowd, which greets them warmly by jobber standards. COLE Nice ovation for this duo, a couple of big guys, Coach! Benjamin starts off, and immediately starts mocking the opponents by pretending to drink from his thumb. However, he turns into a HUGE right hand from Beam! COACH WOW, what a right by Beam, this guy looks like he's well over 300 pounds, Cole! Beam goes to pick Benjamin up, but Benjamin goes to the gut, then gives a thrust to the throat. The referee admonishes him, as Beam reverses an Irish whip. Benjamin leapfrogs Beam, but turns around right into a MASSIVE LARIAT~!, which knocks Benjamin into a backflip and he lands on his side on the mat! COLE What a clothesline, this could be a massive upset already! 1.. 2....... NO! Benjamin gets a shoulder up! COACH Wow, that was close, and how demoralizing would that have been going into the Anderson Cup to lose your undefeated streak to two prelim wresters? COLE They're still on the offense, too, Coach! Beam picks up Benjamin bodyslams him to the canvas, then tags Daniels, who goes to the top. Daniels attempts a BULLDOG, but Benjamin moves and Daniels come down on his hip! COACH Oh, nasty fall there by Daniels, and with Team Heyross this could be the difference in the match! Benjamin waits on Daniels to get up, and then delivers a superkick before tagging Moss in. Daniels tries to struggle to his feet, swinging at the air. COLE Daniels looking really punch-drunk in there right now... COACH It's funny because his name is a cross between Jack Daniels and Jim Beam, which are both whiskeys! Moss hooks Daniels and delivers a vertical suplex. COLE Daniels is small in comparison to Beam, but still larger than both members of Team Heyross. Moss applies a Boston crab to Daniels, then tags Benjamin, who springs over with a guillotine legdrop as Daniels is in the hold! Moss steps out, then quickly steps back in and Team Heyross delivers the DOUBLE GOOZLE~! Moss steps out again, and Benjamin catches Beam off guard and dropkicks him off the apron! Benjamin then tags Moss back in, and Moss lifts Daniels up onto his shoulders as Benjamin climbs to the top. Moss positions himself, and Benjamin comes off the top with a ROCKER DROPPER~! Moss covers... 1... 2..... 3!!!! *DING DING DING* BUFFER Here are your winners...TEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAMMMMMMMMMM HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYRRRRRRRRRRRRRROSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS SSSS!!!!! COACH Well, I said it earlier, Cole, Team Heyross really made this team pay for that missed move by Jim Daniels! COLE And they made a most impressive rebound after that shocking start from Jack Beam! COACH Ah, Cole, the guy just got a couple lucky shots in, that's all! COLE Next opposition for Team Heyross, The Love Doctors, as they attempt to keep their undefeated streak going! But first, Tony Schiavone's got them at the podium! *camera cuts to podium* TONY All right, thank you, Michael, and I am here with Team Heyross, who just added another win to their perfect record in the OAOAST. Were you two surprised by the quick start your opponents got off to? MOSS Tony Schiavone, it's easy to get off to a quick start when you take a cheap shot like the one at the start of that match, but as you saw, brains won out over brawn in the end, just like always! BENJAMIN That's right, Team Heyross has got their eye on the Anderson Cup, as well as the OAOAST Tag Team titles, and we're not going to let two big, dumb rednecks like those guys stand in our way. TONY Well, standing in your way of the Anderson Cup would be your first-round opponents, the Love Doctors, with the Sooner Bruisers waiting in the wings! BENJAMIN Well, we've got some unfortunate news for the Doctors, that Cup's coming to us, and there's no vaccine for what Team Heyross is going to bring to you next week. MOSS And as far as the Sooner Bruisers go, when we advance to meet those two, it goes right back to that brains-over-brawn theory I told you about, you'll find out who the real All-Americans are in the OAOAST! TONY All right, a very confident Team Heyross, getting set for perhaps the biggest single month of their careers! Let's send it over to Josh Matthews, who is standing by with Zack Malibu! Backstage, interviewer extraordinaire, and admitted metrosexual JOSH MATTHEWS~! is (as Tony says) standing idly by, waiting for his next interview assignment, as various backstage personnel scurry past and do their various tasks for this live episode of HeldDOWN~! JOSH (to cameraman) So whaddya think, Marty? Hit up catering before the pre-match interview? MARTY Sounds good to me. Although from what I hear, you might wanna stay away from the roast beef. That stuff'll slide right through ya. JOSH It's probably how COD stays so skinny. But I kid, come...wait...Marty? MARTY Yeah? JOSH Why the hell are you filming this? MARTY Well ya know, I figure take some candid video footage and compile it one day, make a nice little documentary about the OAOAST. JOSH And somehow me talking about catering is going to make the cut? MARTY Well, uh... JOSH You haven't thought this through yet, have you? MARTY Not, uh...not really. JOSH I see, well... "Hey, Matthews! Over here." JOSH Oh...um, OK! Marty, c'mon, this could be good. The camera wobbles as Marty scurries behind Josh Matthews, who has headed over to ZACK MALIBU, and immediately shoves a mic in his face. Malibu slowly lowers Josh's hand (and the mic) so that it's not jabbing him in the chin. MALIBU Jeez, ten seconds later and already you're waving this thing in my face. Give me a minute to prep myself. Malibu, clad in jeans, a studded belt, and a PANIC! At The Disco t-shirt, cracks his neck and clears his throat, while Josh and Marty wait on him. MALIBU OK, I'm good. You ready. JOSH Ready. MALIBU OK. So...ready? JOSH Ready. MALIBU ...soooooo? JOSH What? MALIBU You're Josh Matthews... JOSH Yes. Zack slaps his head, while Marty's chuckling can be heard. JOSH Oh...OH! OK wait, let's start this again. Marty, are you ready? MALIBU Oh forget it, give me the mic! Irate, Zack swipes the mic and pushes Matthews off screen, taking the interview into his own hands. MALIBU Ladies and gentlemen, fans of the OAOAST, it is at this time I would like to extend my deepest apologies to Simon Singleton and Ned Blanchard, the tag team known as the New, New Midnight Express. It seems last week in all the focus being placed on The Upstarts, that I seemingly blew off their upcoming challenge for the World Tag Team Titles, and for that, I'm sorry. The New, New Midnight Express are one of the top tag teams in wrestling today, and are a definite threat...although the only thing Jim Cornette appears to be a threat to is a buffet table and good fashion sense. Still, his cunning and scheming has led the NNMX this far, and they'll soon get the rematch they've lusted after, much like how Ned lusts after women who can't speak English, since he can't understand when they reject him, and thus he goes home feeling good about himself despite the fact he's been told to "drown in a bag of cat cheese". See, it's like this, NNMX... Malibu's sly grin morphs into a grim scowl, and his eyes arch as they stare dead into the camera. MALIBU ...the Zack that cracks jokes and gets under the skin of his opponents? The Zack who slaps hands and kisses babies? You're not getting him. He's gone. He's dead and buried, covered in the blood from a Peter Knight beltshot. Soaked in the betrayal of a man called Axel. The Zack Malibu you're getting is a machine, hellbent...some say hellbound...but hellbent on the destruction of those that seek to destroy him. Simon and Ned, while this may not concern you directly, the fact is that you've picked the wrong time to come after something that's mine. You were in a fight before everything went down these past two weeks, and now? Now you're in for the fight of your life, and you have The Upstarts to thank for that. When I step into that ring and look across towards your corner, I won't just see you. I'll see Axel. I'll see Peter Knight. Scotty Static. Johnny Jax. Christian Wright. Bohemoth. Jamie O'Hara...EVERY GOD DAMN PERSON THAT LUSTS FOR THE DESTRUCTION OF THIS COMPANY AND LONGS TO BEAR WITNESS TO THE END OF MY CAREER. Zack breathes heavily, but pauses, as he's growing increasingly angered with every syllable. MALIBU I apologize to you, New, New Midnight Express, for not acknowledging you when I should have. I'd also like to apologize in advance for what is to come, because you two have to look forward to becoming casulties of war. See you soon. With that, Zack throws the mic back to Josh Matthews and storms off, leaving Josh wild-eyed and shocked, as we fade out to commercial. Commercial break Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 COLE Welcome back. Last week we were having a match between Parka and Otaku II when Jamie O'Hara came down and attacked Parka, thus ending the match. This week Otaku gets another shot. Hopefully O'Hara keeps his nose out of this match this time around. CABOOSE Who's going to stop him? Axel sure as hell hasn't banned O'Hara from ringside and I highly doubt he will. COACH Of course he won't because he's a smart man. CABOOSE Coach that makes no sense, but I don't feel like arguing. “Ashburn" by Hikari begins to play and as the first verse ends Otaku II comes out to the stage with Ayane and Tony Capella. The fans cheer as he jogs to the ring and high fives the fans along the way. COLE Last week we told you about the history between both competitors masks. Both men are very traditonally minded when this business is concerned and I know both men hate when a match is interrupted by an outside force. CABOOSE Especially when it's their own match. COACH Well obviously O'Hara thought the match was boring and decided to spare the fans. CABOOSE I wish he'd come down here and spare us of you. BUFFER This match is scheduled for one fall and is for the X-Division Championship. Introducing first. From Boston, Mass. Accompanied to the ring by Ayane Mitsui and Tony Capella, weighing in at 215 pounds...OTAKU II!!!!!!! YEAHHHH!!!!!!! Otaku II enters the ring and takes off his Eddie Guerrero tribute t-shirt before throwing it into the crowd. He then stretches as his music dies down. CALIFORNIA LOVE!!!!! "California Love" by Dr. Dre and Tupac begins as the headlights appear in the entryway and the El Camino pulls out onto the stage. Parka holds his X Title out the window for the fans to see as he parks the car and gets out along with Eddy Kalm. COLE Both men have backup outside the ring so let's hope that's enough. COACH You call Eddy Kalm backup?? Parka slaps hands with some fans along the way. He enters the ring and hands his mask to Eddy before shaking hands with Otaku II. BUFFER Introducing next. From San Diego, California. Accompanied to the ring by Eddy Kalm. Weighing in at 245 pounds. He is the current X-Division Champion...THE PARKA!!!!! YEAHHHH!!!!!!! COLE The crowd is pretty even for both men. COACH Well then they should make up their damn minds which one they're going to cheer for! CABOOSE It's their right to cheer or boo whoever they want. *DING DING DING* Both men circle each other and then lock up. They fight for control and Otaku manages to get it. Otaku locks in a Side Headlock, but Parka shoves him off towards the ropes. However, Otaku holds on with one hand and pulls Parka back into the headlock. Parka adjusts his strategy and moves into position so he can nail a Backdrop Suplex. As Parka tries to lift him Otaku quickly pulls him forward with a Headlock Takeover. COLE Otaku has control over Parka right now. Parka grabs at Otaku's arm and manages to wrench free and twist Otaku's arm into a Hammerlock. Parka wrenches in on the move hard, causing Otaku's arm to bend behind him as far as it can go. COLE Parka could have torn the arm right out of socket. CABOOSE I venture to say Parka is still a little peeved from last week. Not necessarily at Otaku, but just in general. COACH He needs to get over it. Parka then pulls Otaku up to his feet by the arm and goes to whip him to the ropes, but Otaku reverses and ducks for a Back Body Drop. Parka sees him duck and leaps over for a Sunset Flip. As Otaku falls back he rolls through and back to his feet and quickly goes for the Sharpshooter! COLE Sharpshooter!! This could be it! Parka blocks the move before Otaku can cross his legs and places a few right hands to Otaku's head. Otaku steps back from Parka, who gets to his feet and grabs Otaku's arm to whip him across the ring. As Otaku bounces back Parka nails a Samoan Drop and goes for the first cover. 1 No!! COLE Parka makes the first cover of the match for one! COACH He should do more before making a cover. Eddy, Ayane, and Tony all cheer for the respective competitor as the fans applaud the exchanges so far. Parka meets Otaku as he stands and locks him in for a Snap Suplex, but Otaku blocks it and hits one of his own! Otaku then goes for a cover. 1 No!! COLE Only one for Otaku as well. As Parka stands Otaku drives him back into the corner with forearms to the face. He then whips Parka across the ring to the opposite corner where Parka hits the turnbuckles hard. Otaku runs in, but he is met with a back elbow from Parka. Otaku stumbles away and ends up with his back to Parka who quickly nails a Bulldog and makes a cover. 1 2 No!! COLE Parka gets a two count off a vicious Bulldog! COACH Yeah, but he hasn't beat the guy yet. CABOOSE Can't you just enjoy the match? Parka stands and waits for Otaku to get up before going for a Shining Wizard, but Otaku catches his leg and Parka falls to the mat. Otaku then stands and goes for the Sharpshooter again. He almost locks it in, but Parka scrambles to the ropes for a break. COLE I think both men are trying to end this early to avoid any run ins. CABOOSE I think you might be right. COACH What is this a love fest between you two? I think both men are scared of O'Hara! CABOOSE Coach you are getting on my last nerve. Otaku backs off and lets Parka stand before rushing in and going for a Hurricanrana that sends Parka across the ring. Otaku pulls Parka away from the ropes and goes for the Sharpshooter again, but Parka hooks his head for a Small Package. 1 2 No!! COACH Heh heh small package. COLE Geez Coach have some self respect! Both men get up and Parka goes for a Clothesline, but Otaku ducks it and grabs Parka's arms from behind before hitting a Tiger Suplex with a bridge. 1 2 No!! COLE Otaku with a brutal suplex!! Parka gets up slowly and groggy as Otaku measures him and goes for a Roaring Elbow to the chin! Parka blocks it at the last second and kicks Otaku in the gut before hooking him for a Vertical Suplex. Parka nails it and rolls over for another. COLE You know what's coming! COACH Jamie O'Hara! COLE No the Supercharger! COACH No...Jamie O'Hara is coming to the ring! Look! Sure enough O'Hara is on his way out and Parka lets go of Otaku after the second suplex to cut him off. As soon as Parka stands O'Hara stops and throws his hands up to show that he means no harm. COLE Yeah right! O'Hara is pleading innocence. COACH He is innocent! He hasn't done anything! Parka yells at O'Hara as Eddy, Ayane, and Tony form a wall in front of the ring to block O'Hara's path. O'Hara throws his hands up again and decides to watch from a distance. Parka turns around just in time to catch a Roaring Elbow to the jaw! Parka doesn't go down because of the ropes, instead he bounces off the ropes right back into Otaku's arms. Otaku then puts him in a Standing Head Scissors and goes for the Bubblegum Crash. COLE Bubblegum Crash! He could have it won right here! COACH And I bet you'll blame it on O'Hara won't you Cole? Otaku hits it and rolls over and out from under Parka. He then goes for the Sharpshooter and locks it in! CABOOSE Otaku's got Parka right where he wants him!! Parka struggles in pain to get to the ropes, but he is too far away. The ref asks if he wants to quit. The fans clap and cheer to get Parka back into the match. Eddy turns back towards the ring and begins to slap on the mat to get Parka back into it. COLE Parka looks ready to tap! COACH Yeah tap out you coward! You don't want to face O'Hara! CABOOSE Coach I know you're the new Upstart cheerleader, but could you tone it down just a bit. That brown spot on your nose is getting bigger and bigger as you speak. Parka's hand hovers above the mat and O'Hara looks shocked on the outside. The fans start a "Let's Go Parka" chant and Parka once again tries to scoot towards the ropes. Parka's hand is inches away and he just needs one last burst of energy. COLE Parka is reaching with all he's got. Finally Parka grabs the ropes and the ref calls for a break. Otaku releases the hold and readies himself for Parka to stand. COLE I can't believe it! Parka escaped the hold. COACH Whoopity Doo! Parka gets to his feet, but appears to be on jelly legs, which Otaku sees and kicks Parka's leg out from under him. COLE Otaku kicked Parka's leg out of his leg! COACH He what!? Parka goes down to the mat and Otaku pulls him to the center of the ring by his leg. He then drops two elbows onto the leg and goes for the Sharpshooter again, but Parka punches his way out of the attempt and gets back to his feet. Parka then kicks Otaku in the gut and goes for the Day of the Dead. COLE Parka is looking to end this match! CABOOSE Yeah, but I don't think he has the strength left in his legs. Parka can't hold Otaku up and Otaku manages to slip out behind him. Otaku then grabs Parka from behind and nails a German Suplex. COLE Otaku should go for a cover now. CABOOSE Yeah, but I think he's going up top. COACH He's being stupid. Otaku climbs to the top turnbuckle and goes for a Shooting Star Press, but Parka gets his knees up! COACH Told you. CABOOSE Don't go patting yourself on the back. Otaku rolls around the mat in pain as Parka pulls himself up using the ropes. As Otaku gets to his knees Parka nails him with a desparation Shining Wizard! COLE Shining Wizard!! CABOOSE Parka isn't making a cover. CABOOSE Well then he's stupid too! Parka slowly crawls over to Otaku and drapes an arm over him. 1 2 3!! No!! COLE Otaku kicks out!! COACH Like I said... CABOOSE Who cares! I'm saying for you to shut up! The fans are cheering both men as Parka gets back up and pulls Otaku up with him. Parka then goes for the Day of the Dead again, but Otaku slips behind and hooks Parka's arms before taking him over with a Backslide. However, Parka flips over and pulls Otaku up again for the Day of the Dead. COLE Parka rolled through and has him up again!! This time Parka hits the move and goes for a cover. 1 2 3!!! *DING DING DING* BUFFER Here is your winner and still X-Division Champion.....THE PARKA!!!!! "California Love" plays over the speakers as the fans cheer the win for Parka. COLE What a hard fought matchup! COACH Yeah, but at Anglepalooza O'Hara won't fail where Otaku II did. CABOOSE What makes you so sure?? Parka has his hand raised as the fans cheer. Otaku slowly gets up and extends a hand to Parka who shakes it and then raises Otaku's hand. COACH Give me a break. Parka leaves the ring only to come face to face with O'Hara. O'HARA Goin' somewheres man?? PARKA Yeah I'd like to go back to the locker room. O'HARA Well you are carryin' mah belt! PARKA Funny I thought it was my belt. O'HARA Listen yo! I pinned yo ass at Climax so it's my belt! You're just keeping it warm for me! PARKA That's nice. Now will you move? O'HARA Yo!! Don't snub me fool!! O'Hara shoves Parka who then gets in his face. PARKA You've got a shot at Anglepalooza so what's your problem? O'HARA My problem is all I hear about is you everywhere I turn. What about me? I'm da freakin' shit around here, but everyone wants to talk about you! PARKA Well at the PPV you can shut them up. Until then I suggest that you move out of my way. O'HARA Fine....but remember don't get no scuff marks on that belt before you hand it to me. Parka walks on to the El Camino looking quite pissed as O'Hara just smirks. COLE O'Hara is trying to get under Parka's skin. COACH Looks like he's doing it to me! The camera cuts to the backstage area where Vitamin X and Cuban Wall, Brains & Brawn, are talking. X is in his street clothes, while Cuban Wall is in his wrestling gear because he lives wrestling damnit! The crowd, as usual, boos the two Lightning Crew members. VITAMIN X Yeah, last week was awesome. You and I, we’re a tag team now. We’re Brains & Brawn! Man, I can’t wait to get some action around here. And I don’t mean girl action, if you catch my drift. CUBAN WALL Yeah, I get it. VX Heh. Yeah. Anyway, when things get going, when we are able to gain some momentum! That is going to be awesome! CUBAN WALL Say, when will he get something going? VX Uh…I don’t know, actually. CW You don’t know? VX No, I don’t. I haven’t actually given much thought to how we will go about accomplishing anything in the Tag Team Division. Cuban Wall slaps his head. CUBAN WALL You mean to tell me that you’ve spent time thinking of ridiculous entrances for us, but no time whatsoever on getting a Tag Team Title shot or something like that? VITAMIN X Nope. Cuban Wall punches Vitamin X in the jaw! VX Ow! Stop that! I don’t know how much more my jaw can take! CUBAN WALL I want the Tag Team Titles. NOW! VX Hey. Easy, big guy. Easy. We can’t get a Tag Title shot now. We just became a team last week! But, what we CAN do is make the other teams in the OAOAST Tag Team Division notice us. That’s what we can do! CUBAN WALL So, when do we start doing that? Vitamin X scratches his chin, thinking. He looks at something off camera, and then gets an idea. VITAMIN X We start doing that tonight! Vitamin X runs out of the shot. Cuban Wall watches him run. CUBAN WALL Tonight? Cool. (Cut to Triple C) COLE Oh boy, when Vitamin X gets an idea it usually doesn't mean anything good. COACH That's what you've gotta do around here to show that you mean buisness. Right Caboose? CABOOSE Grrrr. Sweet Home Chicago hits and Jumbo comes through the curtains and down the aisle, high-fiving the fans enthusiastically. COLE And here's another participant in the Lethal Rumble, big Jumbo! BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall! Introducing first, from Chicago, Illinois, weighing in at 440 pounds...JUMMMMMMMMMMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Jumbo climbs into the ring and raises his arms, receiving cheers from the crowd. BUFFER His opponent, to my left, from Winston-Salem, North Carolina, weighing 244 pounds...KEVIN CARSON! COLE Young Kevin Carson, a tremendous opportunity to be able to compete on the #1 wrestling show in the world! Carson extends his hand for Jumbo to shake, and Jumbo accepts...and is slapped in the face by Carson! COACH ...well, I think he's about to regret this "opportunity" right about now! Carson brags about his feat, but while he does, continues to hold Jumbo's hand. Jumbo smiles to the crowd, then squeezes the hand of Carson, bringing him to his knees! Jumbo then brings his hand down to the mat and stomps it! Carson gets up holding his hand and leans in a corner facing the crowd. He doesn't notice Jumbo revving up and charging in with a big AVALANCHE~! Jumbo then turns around and sets Carson up on the buckles, then follows him up? COLE Superplex by the big guy, perhaps? Jumbo goes to the second rope, and brings Carson to the mat with a SUPERPLEX~! Jumbo then pops up and backs into the ropes, coming back with the XL SPLASH~! 1... 2.... 3!!! *DING DING DING* BUFFER Here is your winner...JUMMMMMMMMMMBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! COLE Well, Jumbo makes quick work of a very arrogant Kevin Carson, and if I were 29 other guys in that Lethal Rumble match, I'd keep an eye on the big man, he's got as good a chance as anyone to win it all! AnglePalooza 2006 Just 10 days away! The man, the myth, the legend, Josh “J.Math” Matthews, master of the Mathillennium, and stone cold pimp of the nation, is positioned at the top of lavishly decorated OAOAST interview stage, which currently rests to the bottom left of the giant video screen above the entrance door. Hanging on the walls of the stage are pictures of various OAOAST stars past and present, Tony Brannigan, Dan Black, Some Guy, Zack, CWM, Peter Knight, etc. Decked out in an Anglemania basketball jersey, and baggy sweatpants, Josh stands proud, ignoring the numerous accusations of goat rape from the various crowd members. JOSH “J.MATH” MATTHEWS, MASTER OF THE MATHILLENNIUM AND STONE COLD PIMP OF THE NATION Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure to bring to you one of the newest tag teams in the OAOAST, Flex Phillips, Biff Atlas....N...R...G! The second Josh concludes his introduction, the airy sounds that make up the opener of former Bush frontman Gavin Rossdale's song Adrenaline fill the jam packed venue. The arena dims down to an erry darkness, illuminated solely by a green glow engulfing the entrance stage. Several seconds pass through time, allowing comments and boos to slip out the lips of the restless audience. Eventually the pace of Mister Stefani's voice picks up as does the accompanying instrumentals. The entrance doors tearing apart, revealing for the very first time, the duo known as NRG. Flex Phillips outfitted in a stunning navy pinstriped suit, steps out to the edge of stage, arrogantly regarding the booing audience with bitterest contempt. Biff Atlas, tobacco bulging the side of his fat cheek, stalks across the staging area, occasionally spiting the brown substance at those spectators who have the nerve to taunt him. Eventually the muscular pair congregate at the interview set. JOSH Flex, Biff, great to have ya here on HeldDOWN~! FLEX PHILLIPS First off, I would be remiss if I didn't take a moment to thank Axel for providing myself and my partner with the time to speak on matters. Axel is a man who's keen eye for talent quickly implores his swift hand to action! Biff and I are proud to represent the NRG banner within Axel's HeldDOWN~! “AX-HOLE! AX-HOLE!” chants a single fan in a MST3K t-shirt in response to the mention of Axel's name. Biff manages to shut him up by spitting a wad of tobacco in his face. FLEX Secondly, I'd be like to introduce the viewing audience to a woman who's pure class is only dwarfed by her immense beauty. The radiance of her very presence will lighten the darkness within your pitiful soul. She is our business consultant, Miss Mackenzie DeCenzo! (The entrance doors open allowing, a leggy, busty brunette in a business suit to step out. She bounces-bounce being the operative word-over to J.Math, who's grinning from ear to ear.) MACKENZIE DeCENZO Thank you. Although I've never watched professional wrestling, and have little interest the product presented and am indifferent to it's continued success, I am not depressed to be here. Thank you. FLEX Thirdly, Josh, direct your eyes to the giant video screen above you, and look at me, then look at you. If the clothes truly make the man, then I must be made out of 24 Karat gold. You, however look to be made out of the pooling puddle of piss and semen next to the toilet inside the center stall of a homeless shelter's bathroom. What in God's name are you wearing, Josh? JOSH This is a shirt. These are pants You might have learned that in second grade. And this thing I'm talking into, this is a microphone. Can you say microphone? FLEX Well, Carson Daly, what you call a shirt I call an affront to good taste and respectable fashion. JOSH What do you mean? This is fly fabric! My threads are off the chain! I look goooood. If I was a grocery store, I'd be super fresh, because that's what I am! Fre-fre-fre-fre-fresh! “KILL YOURSELF, JOSH!” screams a nearby fan. FLEX Fly fabric? Josh, this interview is not being conducted at some rinky dink indy wrestling outfit running down at Mike's Bar N Grill in front of twenty five people who are only there to get out of the rain. According to apron on the ring, and the banner on this interview stage, you are on HeldDOWN. Last I checked HeldDOWN was a cutting edge television show, broadcasted into the homes of millions of loyal viewers worldwide. I would hope you would have the dignity to present yourself as such! But you think it's cool to dress like one of the rubes, don't you? Why do we even need you, Josh? Why don't we just use this guy in the front row, stuffing his face with nachos slowly eating himself into cardiac arrest, to interview us? Biff, Josh thinks his “fly fabric” is alright. Josh Matthews, thinks it's okay to conduct himself without a level of professionalism due his station! (Moaning sweetly, Biff takes a loving a sniff of Josh's hair) BIFF His hair smells real pretty. JOSH Uh...um...thanks? FLEX Josh, consider this an intervention from a fashion expert. I want you to put this on. (Flex takes off his suit coat and puts it on Josh. Thanks to the obvious size differential between Flex and Josh, the suit makes the interviewer look like a young child who's tried on his daddy's work clothes.) FLEX Dress like the man, and you will be the man. NRG Word of Wisdom Number 129. America, how does J.Math look? “I'D FUCK HIM!” screams a seven year old boy. FLEX What do you say, Biffster, how's he looking? Does he look like the man? (Purring as he does so, Biff gently glides his stubby fingers through a terrified Josh's gorgeous hair) BIFF Damn, your hair smells pretty. What do you put in it? JOSH Uh, Pantene Pro-V. BIFF That all? Just Pantene? Smells real pretty 'n sweet. God damn. Flex, you gotta take a whiff of this here kid's hair. (Flex leans in for a sniff. He smiles as the sweetend aroma of Josh's scent wafts up his nostrils) FLEX I'm liking it. I'm liking it. Speaking of fine shampoo products, you know what I dig? That Herbal stuff.. Errands, echoes, starts with an e. BIFF Herbal Essence, ya filthy hippy. And that's a conditioner. FLEX What's the difference? MACKENZIE Conditioner goes on after shampoo. But Herbal Essence is a shampoo also. I really like their Fruit Fusions line. BIFF I happened to have never tried that! MACKENZIE Oh, you don't know what your missing, Biff! It does wonders for oily hair! JOSH Oooookay, well it's been very educational from the Loreal contingent. But how about we get down to business. And our business is wrestling! Next week you two face off in our final Anderson Cup opening match, against none other then the Sk8er Boiz..... The females in the audience let loose with a full throated roar for the handsome hunks. JOSH Listen to that reaction! It should be one heck of a fight, eh! BIFF Hippy, that's as much a fight as there is between a lion and a zebra. It never fails to make me laugh when I watch the Discovery channel, and I see the zebra running it's ass off, as if it has a chance of being the one zebra who actually can cheat death. The zebra has no chance! When you put the mightiest animal on earth, the lion, against the zebra, the outcome is inevitable! The zebra lives as long as the lion allows it to live! The Sk8er Boiz live as long as we allow them to live! When the lion wants that zebra, it's over. When we want the Sk8er Boiz, it is over for them! The lion is the king of that zebra's world. NRG is the king of the Sk8er Boiz' world. When someone dies, you say god thought it was their time to go. There is no god in my jungle! I am god, damn it! I am the lion, I decide who lives and who dies! And I say the zebra is deader then disco! This is a scene that has played out for centuries! This very scene will play out next week on HeldDOWN! Show up at the arena on January 26th and you can watch nature at it's most barbaric! When the lion gets the zebra in it's fangs, there is nothing left for that zebra but a gruesome, bloody death. Zoom in close cameraman, get a good shot of the savage beast. You can see the saliva dripping off the edge of my razor sharp fangs, you can smell the pungent odor of the bloodlust on my rancid breath. The lion is hungry. The lion wants his zebra! (Biff starts sniffing Josh's hair again) And maybe the lion wants a mate to. Maybe the king of the jungle...needs a queen? I bet yer a real swell kisser, Josh. Ain'tcha, hippy? You got them real thick lips that are right for baby makin'. FLEX (impersonating Austin Powers) Grrrrrrr, baby, very grrrrr. (A fearful Josh hides behind Mackenzie, who's seems least likely to renact a seen from Deliverance) MACKENZIE It's not a fight. It's a slaughter. It's the superior life form reaffirming dominance over the inferior life form. JOSH We're all aware of what your issue is with the Boiz, but most of us don't think it makes any real sense. What is the problem with them giving your products props? Krista Isadora Duncan was more then happy that they endorsed her videos and books. If Boiz are good enough for Kris, aren't they good enough for NRG? A “Krista” chant starts up among the spectators. MACKENIZE Did you see her at the Golden Globes? Psh! What about that dye job, Biff? BIFF It looked like a skunk went 'n died up on her head. I had to turn my TV off, I did. It was that ugly. FLEX Matthews, you like the rest of America have brought into the carefully constructed marketing scheme known as Krista Isadora Duncan. The quirky personalities of Krista, and her cute little sidekick Alix, are about as real as Santa Clause or the Tooth Fairy. They are the high paying machinations of a well funded corporate think tank. Get on your sunglasses, because I'm about to show you the light. Let me tell you a little something about the lovely and talented Krista Isadora Duncan. She isn't lovely, and the jury's still out on the talented bit, I do declare. I know Krista Isadora Duncan “world renowned fitness expert” and she may be world renowned but the only thing she's an expert in is giving lap dances at the company's Christmas party after a few Strawberry Daiquiris. Her and her sidekicks rise to the top of the entertainment industry is solely due to the fact that they have no qualms about sleeping with every man and woman in their Rolodex! Krista's word in the fitness industry holds as much weight as that loud mouth boar Doctor Phil's does in the world of psychology. Her brand of “pop fitness” isn't fit to be taken seriously by anyone with a fully functioning brain. Let me read an excerpt from her book Soul of a Womyn, I've memorized it by heart, “In order to achieve the best possible you, you must carefully outline your fitness and beauty goals.” (Flex pauses to laugh at the stupidity only he can see.) FELX Holy shit on a peanut butter and penis sandwich! What a profound and astounding revelation, Miss Isadora Duncan! Might there be any other nuggets of shimmering wisdom you'd enjoy sharing with us? Apparently there are because she's wrote about ten of these things. Each more trite then the last. You can take her words with more salt then the Gunther Salt company produces in a year. Who's letting this woman write self help books, when she's lugging around more baggage then a Samsonite factory? She's one DUI away from getting the pink slip dropped on her, and spending the next six years of her miserable life as the center square on Hollywood squares. Don't listen to her. Of course she'll take an endorsement from the Sk8er Bois. She doesn't care about the quality of her product. Not like I do. Not like NRG does. She was on Oprah a week ago and she let Oprah endorse her product! Oprah for Pete's sake! Oprah endorsing a fitness product? Wrap your brain around that, man! MACKENIZE Biff, did you see Oprah's hair when she interviewed that woman who's husband get killed on that cruise ship? BIFF Those curls were simply divine, Oprah. Simply divine. FLEX Uh-huh. Josh, within the word NRG there is a silent Q. That Q stands for quality. You can take away our offices, you can take us off the shelves, you can take away our tax records in an IRS investigation my lawyer advised me not to comment on, but you can never take away the Quality! As I tell my shareholders with both pride and conviction, quality is the one thing that NRG embodies. Quality in it's employees. Quality in it's product. Quality in it's presentation. Quality in it's customers. The Sk8er Boiz are anything but quality. NRG is used by the crème de la crème. The Sk8er Boiz are the merde de la merde. The shit of the shit. And what do you do with shit? “EAT IT!” screams a fan in the front row. FLEX No. You flush it down the toilet, and that is exactly where the Sk8er Boiz' chances of winning this tournament went the moment they were paired against NRG. NRG.... BIFF TASTE THE RAINBOW! (Face twisted in annoyance, Flex punches the air) MACKENZIE Biff, that's not the slogan. BIFF It ain't? FLEX Noooooooo. Let's try one more time. NRG... “I LIKE TO EAT SHIT!” screams the fecalmaniac in the front row. (Driven to edge of his sanity, Flex storms off the stage, cussing under his breath. Slightly more upbeat, Biff and Mackie follow suit.) JOSH You have been NRGIzed, ladies and gentlemen! Triple C, the stone cold pimp of the nation sends it back to ya'll skeezers. (Back to Sofa Central) COLE ....NRG, ladies and gentlemen. We'll be back with our second Anderson Cup match in a second. COACH Who lets fans like that in here, anyway? Commercial break Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 (edited) COLE Fans, we're still awaiting the arrival of Leon Rodez to the arena tonight. Axel, in a surprisingly gracious move, has said that, if Rodez cannot make it to the arena tonight, the match scheduled between he and Dan Black will take place next week on HeldDOWN. COACH That's not all. Axel also said that he is calling a meeting of everyone that will be involved in the Lethal Rumble match next week because he has a big announcement regarding that match. I know what it is, and it's absolutely brilliant. 'Course, I'll never tell you jackasses. You'll just have to wait. COLE Well, right now.... The lights go down in the arena. A Puerto Rican flag appears on the AngleTron. In big white blocky letters, the following words appear on the screen, with Tha Puerto Rican saying them: *THE CHAMP IS HERE!* With that, a lightning bolt hits the entrance, the PRL entrance video plays on the AngleTron, and “Know Your Role ‘99” begins playing, with the crowd standing up and booing. COLE ....it looks like PRL is coming out here! PR is heard saying, “THE CHAMP IS HERE!” throughout the song, while smoke fills up the entryway and the lights flicker on and off in the entrance. A few seconds elapsed, the entrance doors slide open, and through the smoke comes “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican…who looks a little bit different this week. COLE What the? Tha Puerto Rican is wearing a Colombian flag bandana with the knot tied on the front, an earring on his left ear, a gray shirt with a Patrick Ewing New York Knicks basketball jersey over it, 4 finger rings on both of his hands, a $500 Rolex watch, black baggy jeans that are 4 sizes too big and fall to PRL’s ankles revealing his gray with navy blue pinstripes boxers, black workman boots, a clock around his neck, and more gold chains around his neck than Mr. T. PRL is also carrying a pimp cane and doing Eddie Guerrero’s “shimmy dance”. COLE Why the Hell is Tha Puerto Rican dressed like that? COACH I think I figured out who PRL is supposed to be. He’s dressed as Colombian Heat! COLE Oh give me a break. The crowd catches on to Puerto’s impression, and starts booing louder than they were before. PR pretends that the jeers are cheers, and plays to the crowd. He smiles at the camera, revealing that PRL is also wearing platinum grillz, and then walks down the entrance ramp, twirling his pimp cane like a baton. CABOOSE (in between his laughing) This is great! This is a perfect impression of Colombian Heat! I approve! COLE PRL is making a mockery of Colombian Heat just two weeks away from their clash for the 24/7 Title at Anglepalooza! COACH And it’s a well-deserved mockery, in my opinion. Chants of “P.R. SUCKS! P.R. SUCKS!” fill the arena as PRL continues his walk to the ring. Puerto jaw jacks with a fan at ringside, and then does the “WESTSIIIIIIIDE” hand signal that Colombian Heat usually does. PR continues walking to the ring, bobbing his head to “Know Your Role ‘99”. CABOOSE (still laughing) I mean, look! Look at his clothes! Look at his teeth! Is that PRL or Ali G? Tha Puerto Rican hops over the top rope into the ring. PR does Eddie Guerrero’s “shimmy dance” again, and then gets on the second rope, doing the “WESTSIIIIIIIDE” hand signal, receiving boos. PRL then gets on the second turnbuckle and throws up the “W” hand signal again. The crowd boos. COLE I take it PRL’s impression of Colombian Heat isn’t done yet. CABOOSE Oh no, it’s not. He’s going to speak on the mic. I can’t wait to hear what he says! PRL gets off the second turnbuckle and raises his hands in the air. The crowd boos. PRL twirls his pimp cane like a baton again. COACH Tha Puerto Rican is making a good point. You see the clothes, the teeth, the movements? Those are COLOMBIAN HEAT’S! PRL looks ridiculous like that, and that’s the point. He’s trying to say that Colombian Heat is a goofball who doesn’t deserve the honor of wearing the OAOAST 24/7 Title! COLE I know what he’s trying to say, but couldn’t he have done it in a better way? COACH Nope. This was the best way to get his point across to these simpletons, including Colombian Heat himself! PRL throws some random hand signals and grabs his nuts. Several times infact. Puerto does the Crip Walk, and then grabs a microphone. COLE Tha Puerto Rican is going to speak. Hang on folks this could take a while. CABOOSE That was unfucking uncalled for. PRL holds the microphone with his left hand, and the pimp cane with his right. He motions for his music to stop. “Know Your Role ‘99” dies down. COACH Here we go! CABOOSE Oh boy! PRL has a cocky smirk on his face while he surveys the crowd. The fans start booing again. “P.R. SUCKS!” starts. PRL smiles again, showing his platinum teeth. “THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN (sounding like a stereotypical black man) Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! CABOOSE Heh, PRL’s right. Colombian Heat does say, “Yo!” a lot! PRL continues. PUERTO RICAN a.k.a. “COLOMBIAN HEAT” If all of y’all are ready, to see me make Tha Puerto Rican feel the Heat, then make some noise up in this BI-AAAAAAAAAAATCH~!!! Instead of cheers, the crowd boos PRL for stealing Colombian Heat’s opening spiel. “COLOMBIAN HEAT” A’ight, y’all. A’ight, y’all. Sup dawgs? What’s up? Are all y’all ready for Anglepalooza in three—uh—four—uh…(“Heat” looks at his fingers)…two weeks? CROWD BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! “COLOMBIAN HEAT” Yeah. Me too. I’m so excited, yo! In two weeks, I can become the NEW 24/7 Champion! Belee dat, playas! Of course, it’ll never again, G. I mean, after all, Tha Puerto Rican is bigger, stronger, faster, and he’s a lot more smarter than Colombian Heat, you know what I’m saying? COACH It’s true! COLE Stop it. “COLOMBIAN HEAT” Oh well. Dis is what I’s get for hurting Tha Puerto Rican. I’s hurt PRL many times in the past. It’s all my fault that PRL lost to The Mad Cappa at AngleMania III. It’s all my fault that Tha Puerto Rican lost the Puerto Rican Championship. If it weren’t for me, Colombian Heat, PRL would STILL be the Puerto Rican Champion to this day, along with the 24/7 Champion! But no, PRL is not the Puerto Rican Champion to this day. Why? Cuz I’s is so stupid! Dat’s why! COLE Can someone turn off his microphone? This is getting ridiculous! I mean, is PRL still bitter about losing to The Mad Cappa at AngleMania III in TWO THOUSAND FOUR!? COACH Hey, why all the hate? I like this so far. “COLOMBIAN HEAT” I would love to win the 24/7 Title too. I mean if I won, I would have some bling-bling to put around mah waist. I would be dee freshest most dope dy-no-mite 24/7 Champion in history! And after I won, all the bitches and dee hos would come to me. And then we would be up in the club, smoking blunts, popping cry-stal, partying all night long. Getting CRUNK’D UP! Ya feel me? PRL—Uh, I mean, “Colombian Heat” smiles, showing his platinum grillz again. Coach and Caboose are ROTFLMAO. “COLOMBIAN HEAT” But that’s never going to happen. Never ever, yo. Oh well. Atleast I can dream. Atleast I can dream that I am the Twenty-izzle Fo-izzle Sev-izzle Champ-izzle! Ma-dizzle, ren-izzle, yo-dizzle, fo-shizzel, a-dizzel. PRL starts babbling incoherently, using “-izzle” every ten seconds. PRL grabs his balls for the umpteenth time. PUERTO RICAN Fdjf;lkdlkjdfld;fj;jd;djd;djd;djd; WESTSIIIIIIIIIIDE! CABOOSE He’s got Colombian Heat down pat! He talks just like him! HA! HA! HA! “COLOMBIAN HEAT” Oh, I wish I could be like PRL. But I never will be. PRL is just so much better than me. I should feel lucky for even hanging out with him. Tha Puerto Rican is superior to me in every way. I am just a lowly, pathetic, nobody! Word to your mother! COLE Hey wait! Colombian Heat never says “word to your mother!” CABOOSE SHHH! You’re ruining the moment! The crowd boos loudly, sick and tired of PRL’s bad impersonation of Colombian Heat. PR, sensing that he’s made his point, takes his platinum grillz off and throws them onto the mat. THA PUERTO RICAN (in his normal voice) Now, don’t I look absolutely ridiculous standing right here in the middle of the ring dressed like THIS? The crowd murmurs in agreement. PRL nods his head. PUERTO RICAN Thought so. So, why is it, that you people cheer Colombian Heat, despite the fact that he dresses JUST LIKE THIS EVERY SINGLE DAY? Can somebody answer that question? COLE I think PRL went a little over-the-top in regards to Colombian Heat’s clothing. COACH No. He’s right on the money. PRL removes the clock and gold chains around his neck as he talks. THA PUERTO RICAN I don’t get it. I should be the one getting cheered. I am the one who busts my ass every night! I am the one who has proven time and time again that I am the most electrifying man in professional wrestling! I am the one who has reigned as OAOAST 24/7 Champion for 9 glorious months! What has Colombian Heat done? What has HE done for YOUR adulation? What is it? Is it the little spiel that he spits out before his matches? The crowd cheers at the mention of that. PRL Or…or…is it the fact that Colombian Heat does the Colombian Necktie on his opponents? Is that it? The crowd cheers at the mention of CH’s finisher. PUERTO RICAN What? Is it because Colombian Heat likes to smoke (mute)? The crowd cheers at the mention of THAT. CABOOSE PRL’s right. There’s no good reason to cheer for Colombian Heat! COLE Well I think there are plenty of good reasons to cheer for him! CABOOSE Name one. COLE Uh…uh… COACH Got’cha! A lightbulb goes off in PRL’s head. PUERTO RICAN Oh. Okay. Okay. Now I get it. Now I KNOW why you people like to cheer for Colombian Heat. I now know the answer. The reason you would rather cheer for Colombian Heat than myself is because Colombian Heat…is a loser. And all of you…are losers. Yeah, that’s it. All you losers want to root for someone you can connect with, and obviously, whom do losers connect with? Other losers! You losers want to live vicariously through Colombian Heat, which is a bit odd I think, since why would a loser want to live vicariously through another loser? COACH The man makes a good point. The crowd doesn’t agree with Caboose’s opinion. PUERTO (CONT’D) So that’s why all of you cheer for Colombian Heat. Because you are just like him! You are all LOSERS! You all wear the same ridiculous outfits. You all say the most stupidest things! You all watch the same crappy shows. You all listen to the same horrible music. You all go to the same terrible movies. When I look into the eyes of Colombian Heat on Sunday January 29th, I will look into the eyes of each and every one of you! Because you people and Colombian Heat are one and the same. You are all LOSERS. And you all ABSOLUTELY POSITIVELY SUCK! BOOOOOOOO! HISS~! HISS~! BOOOOOOOOOO! HISS~! HISS~! PRL removes the Colombian flag bandana on top of his head and looks directly into the camera. PRL Colombian Heat. I HATE YOU. Just like I hate these people. You and these people make me sick to my stomach! And I can’t wait until Anglepalooza, because on January 29th, I will prove to you, and prove to your fans, prove to your “followers”, prove to your…people, that I, and the people I roll with, are superior to you and your people IN EVERY SINGLE WAY!!! The fans boo, since they know that the “people” PRL is referencing to refers to them. THA PUERTO RICAN THE CHAMP HAS SPO-KUN~!!! “Know Your Role ‘99” starts playing. PRL has an angry look on his face as he removes the four finger rings from his hands. He sneers at the crowd, and then exits the ring. COLE Strong words from the current 24/7 Champion, and I stress the word, “CURRENT”. That could all change come January 29th at Anglepalooza! CABOOSE Oh I don’t know about that. I have faith in PRL. Faith that he will beat Colombian Heat at Anglepalooza and continue his glorious 24/7 Title reign! COLE PRL talked about hating these people. He says the reason the fans cheer Colombian Heat is because they are just like him. CABOOSE You gotta look deeper into it, Michael. When PRL says he hates these people, he’s not just talking about the fans in attendance tonight. He’s not just talking about the OAOAST fans in general. He’s talking about mainstream society, a society that Colombian Heat is obviously apart of. PRL despises mainstream society and everyone that’s apart of it. THAT’S what he means when he says he hates Colombian Heat and his people. He’s talking about mainstream society. COLE Let me guess: PRL hates mainstream society because the jocks picked on him and the popular girls didn’t want to date him when he was in High School? CABOOSE Well, that’s part of it. He’s actually been an outcast all his life. From elementary school to the OAOAST. He’s always been like this, this is just the first time you’re seeing it live on HeldDOWN~!. You should feel sorry for him. COLE Oh come ON! PRL walks up the entrance ramp, an angry look still on his face. COLE Anyway, Tha Puerto Rican has sent another message to Colombian Heat. Normally, Colombian Heat would respond, but he’s not here this week, as he’s getting ready for next week’s big 10 person, 5-On-5 Survivor Series Elimination Match between The Lightning Crew and Colombian Heat, Spanish Fly, John “Rock Hard” Brickston, Otaku II, and Ayane Mitsui! COACH That’s going to be a good one! “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican glares angrily at the crowd one more time before leaving through the entrance doors as “Know Your Role ‘99” continues playing. (FADE OUT) The next thing we see on screen is a blurry image. Ominous music plays. VOICEOVER Next Thursday on HeldDOWN~! A few “blink and you’ll miss them” shots appear on screen. They are still blurry, so the viewer cannot possibly tell what he/she just saw. The ominous music continues playing. V.O. Prepare to witness… Some more blurry “blink and you’ll miss them” shots appear on screen. V.O. …what is sure to be… The blurry images are starting to become clear. …one of the most talked about matches of the year! The images come at you faster and faster. Soon, the images are revealed to be images of wrestlers fighting each other. The images of wrestlers fighting are shown in rapid-fire succession. And then… *KA-BOOM~!* An explosion occurs! Mr. Boricua chokeslams somebody! High octane, fast paced music plays while the viewer at home sees clips of The Lightning Crew and Colombian Heat’s team in action. V.O. A 5-On-5 Survivor Series Elimination Match! The camera cuts to a close-up of “The Corporate Champion” Tha Puerto Rican. V.O. “THE CORPORATE CHAMPION” THA PUERTO RICAN! The camera cuts to a close-up of Vitamin X. V.O. VITAMIN X! The camera cuts to a close-up of Cuban Wall. V.O. CUBAN WALL! The camera cuts to a close-up of Mr. Boricua. V.O. MR. BORICUA! The camera cuts to a close-up of Ms. Lindsay Gonzalez. V.O. AND MS. LINDSAY GONZALEZ! Clips of Colombian Heat’s team in action are shown. V.O. VS. The camera cuts to a close-up of Colombian Heat. V.O. COLOMBIAN HEAT! The camera cuts to a close-up of Spanish Fly. V.O. SPANISH FLY! The camera cuts to a close-up of John “Rock Hard” Brickston. V.O. JOHN “ROCK HARD” BRICKSTON! The camera cuts to a close-up of Otaku II. V.O. OTAKU II! The camera cuts to a close-up of Ayane Mitsui. V.O. AND AYANE MITSUI! More clips of The Lightning Crew and Colombian Heat’s team in action are shown as the high octane, fast paced music continues playing. V.O. Buckle up your seatbelts and get ready for one of the most anticipated matches in the history of HeldDOWN~! *KA-BOOM~!* Another explosion occurs! Words pop out onto the screen, with the voiceover guy saying them. WITH NO COMMERCIAL INTERRUPTION! More clips of The Lightning Crew and Colombian Heat’s team in action are shown. V.O. You will see every punch! Every kick! Every move! Every elimination! We guarantee it! *KA-BOOM~!* *KA-BOOM~!* Two more explosions occur! Cut to more clips of The Lightning Crew and Colombian Heat’s team in action. V.O. So, sit back, relax, and enjoy what is going to be one hell of a match! The Lightning Crew vs. Colombian Heat, Spanish Fly, John “Rock Hard” Brickston, Otaku II, and Ayane Mitsui in a 5-On-5 Survivor Series Elimination Match! The camera cuts to a black screen with the OAOAST HeldDOWN~! logo on top of the screen, and NEXT THURSDAY 8:00 P.M. EST/5:00 P.M. PST ONLY ON TSM written underneath it in big white blocky letters. V.O. And it will happen on OAOAST HeldDOWN~! Next Thursday at 8:00 p.m. EST/5:00 p.m. PST only on TSM! The high octane, fast paced music ends just as the commercial ends. (FADE OUT) COLE Wow! With that and the final two first round Anderson Cup matches, next week's HeldDOWN should be a great one leading into AnglePalooza. At this time, we've got some footage to show you from earlier in the week with Jenny Adams. Let's take a look... EARLIER IN THE WEEK We take a rare jaunt into the Women's Locker Room at an OAOAST house show in Somewhere, Hicksville where some of the Women's Division are prepared for action. No peep show antics here, folks. Sat in the middle of the room, Jenny Adams stares at the floor beneath her feet looking noticeably dejected. As the other women around her keep themselves to themselves, the door opens and the OAOAST Women's Champion Ashley Street walks in. Ashley sets her bags down, but then notices Jenny and grabs a chair, pulling up beside her. ASHLEY Wanna talk? Jenny shakes her head, still looking straight down. ASHLEY Look, I know this Crystal thing has got you down. But, you've got her at AnglePalooza, remember? JENNY So? ASHLEY So? So, you get the chance to kick her self rightuous ass. JENNY And you think that'll make everything alright? (looks up) You don't get it. The fact I'm in this business is Crystal. I spent my entire life dedicating myself to this sport, because I wanted to be like Crystal. How do you think that feels? How do you think it feels to know the person you looked up to and admired is really a cold, heartless bitch who treats everyone but herself like trash she treads on in the street? Wrestling Crystal isn't going to change that. It's just gonna confirm it. It'll just confirm that Crystal tried to rui...tried to END my career. Jenny looks down again solemnly. ASHLEY I don't geddit. You don't wanna kick her ass? JENNY Is that all you redneck girls think about? Ashley smiles. ASHLEY If you weren't my friend, I'd kick your ass for that. So, what are you gonna do at AnglePalooza then? JENNY Oh, I'll wrestle her. Don't get me wrong. I've waited years for the chance to wrestle Crystal. You know, that was my dream when I started out wrestling. I just wish it wasn't under these sort of circumstances. ASHLEY But...you're gonna kick her ass, right? JENNY If by that you mean 'teach her a little lesson in respect', then yes. Maybe if I beat Crystal, she'll realise that the Women's Division has far more credibility than she could ever give it credit for. And when I beat her, I'm gonna offer her a handshake. ASHLEY You are!?! After all she's done to you and me and everyone else in the Women's Division!?! After she played everyone in this room off against each other for her own sick pleasure!?! JENNY Well...yeah. I know she's angry about this Women's Division thing. But I mean, underneath the Crystal thing, I know there's some good in her heart. Ashley shrugs. ASHLEY Well, you're a better person than me Jen'. JENNY True. ASHLEY If things turn ugly though, I've got your back and I'll make sure Crystal gets her ass kicked one way or the other. JENNY Uhm...thanks? ASHLEY Don't mention it. COLE Wow. Poor Jenny Adams, in a real tough situation come AnglePalooza. We'll be back. Commercial Break Edited January 20, 2006 by King Cucaracha Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 The camera pans around the jammed packed Palace before SWOOPING~! down to the world famous Sofa Central, where the voice of the OAOAST is with a very familar face. If the face doesn't give it away, the loud chant of "JESSE" does. COLE Ladies and gentleman, it is indeed my pleasure to introduce a true broadcasting legend, who will be joining me on commentary from the friendly confines of Sofa Central for our next Anderson Cup opening round match, a man who tells it like it is...Jesse "The Body" Ventura! The eruption from the crowd is soon followed by another round of "JESSE" chants which Ventura acknowledges by pumping his fist in the air. VENTURA Not only do I tell it like it is, Michael Cole, but I just happen to know a little something about tag team wrestling. It ain't no secret The Body's got a soft spot for tag team wrestling that dates back to my days as a member of the East-West Connection along with the late, great Adrian Adonis. And I'm proud to be associated with a company that still vaules the art of tag team wrestling like the OAOAST does. You gotta have special something inside of you to be apart of a team. Dare I say tag team wrestling is even more dangerous than singles competition? I mean, unless your opponent's got a manager ringside, you don't have to worry about somebody stepping in from the apron and cold clocking you from behind. The strategies change and the atomsphere is different in tag team wrestling. I for one love it! COLE You and all the wrestling fans watching live on TSM will love our next match, Jesse. It will be a first round Anderson Cup match from the Miracle Weirdness Connection Conference featuring Christian Wright and Bohemoth vs. The Lone Star Gunslingers. VENTURA On paper you gotta give the edge to Wright and Bo. They're more experience and most importantly, they're members of The Upstarts. But matches aren't won on paper, as we've seen with The GPX and Los Diablos de Fuego, your favorite team, Cole. COLE (chuckles) This will mark the first time the Lone Star Gunslingers, the team of "The Texas Twister" Jock Mulligan and Baron Windels, have competed in the OAOAST or against Christian Wright and Bohemoth for that matter, despite the ties both teams have to HI-YAH. Do you see that having a factor in tonight's match? VENTURA Definitely. But as you said, neither team has faced the other prior to tonight. So the familiarity factor works against both teams. Look for Wright and Bo to use their experience against the young Texicans, Mulligan and Windels. COLE Before we go up to the ring, let's take a look at what has gone down in the Anderson Cup so far. LOS INFERNALES CONFERENCE #1 GPX vs. #8 Los Diablos de Fuego -- LOS DIABLOS #4 The Heavenly Rockers vs. #5 Tha Puerto Rican & Stephen Joseph -- HEAVENLY ROCKERS #2 Thunderkid & Reject vs. #7 The South Central Militia -- TK/REJECT #3 The Sk8ter Boiz vs. #6 NRG SEMI-FINALS February 2nd and 9th CONFERENCE CHAMPIONSHIPS February 16th ANDERSON CUP FINALS ZERO HOUR February 26th MIRACLE WEIRDNESS CONNECTION CONFERENCE #1 Black T vs. #8 James Blonde & Faqu -- BLACK T #4 Christian Wright & Bohemoth vs. #5 The Lonestar Gunslingers #2 The Sooner Bruisers vs. #7 Glory by Anarchy -- SOONERS #3 The Love Doctors vs. #6 Team Heyross VENTURA Outside of Los Diablos, the #8 seed, upsetting last year's Anderson Cup champions The GPX, everything has turned out the way many predicted. That could change if the Lone Star Gunslingers win tonight. Now that I think about, Michael Cole. You know what you and the teams of the Gunslingers and CW and Bo have in common? COLE No. What's that? VENTURA It's a big night for all of you. COLE It is? I know why for both teams, but ME? VENTURA Yeah. You getta commentate with Jesse "The Body" Ventura. There ain't no bigger honor in broadcast journalism than working with The Body, you know. COLE With that, let's go up to the ring and ring announcer Michael Buffer! * DING DING * BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the following contest is a first round ANDERSON CUP match, set for one fall with a 15 minute time limit! The winner advances to meet Black T in the semi-finals of the Miracle Weirdness Connection Conference. Velvet Revolver's "Slither" hits as the lights in the arena go out in favor of a single white spotlight that raidiates down on Christian Wright at the top of the ramp. Behind him the monster Bohemoth. As the song changes tempo, Christian pulls the hood of his long black robe down as Bo flexes TEH GUNZ~! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! BOOM! VENTURA Whoa! COLE An explosive entrance from the #4 seed in the Miracle Weirdness Connection Conference. They look confident, Jess. Hands on hips, Christian Wright marches to the ring with purpose while his partner, the monster Bohemoth, in all his coolness, casually follows behind, psyching himself up and jiggling his pecs because he damn well can, that's why! BUFFER Making their way to the ring, representing The Upstarts...at a total combine weight of 517 pounds, here are the team of CHRISTIAN WRIGHT and BOHEMOTH! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE Not a positive reception for the team of Christian Wright and Bohemoth, who comes in tonight as the favorites. But as my broadcast colleague correctly stated, matches aren't won on paper--or by the odds makers in Vegas. VENTURA Absolutely not. You know, CW and Bo need to be careful they don't come in over confident. If they're already thinking about what awaits in the next round -- Black T, the team I predict will win it all -- then they're gonna find themselves on the short end of the stick. "WAAHAAA, WAH, WAH, WAH..." The "Good, the Bad and the Ugly" theme signals the arrive of The Lone Star Gunslingers. Team unity lives through Jock and Baron as they sport white jackets with the state of Texas embriodered on the back, along matching white trunks and boots with burnt orange kneepads, a yellow rose located on on the right buttock. It's clear the Gunslingers are designed to draw in the female demographic, but their swagger to the ring, especially on the part of the more rugged Baron Windels, shows they're more than just pretty faces. BUFFER And their opponents in the opening round of the 2006 Anderson Cup...weighing in tonight at a total combine weight of 507 pounds, hailing from the Lone Star State, Baron Windels and "The Texas Twister" Jock Mulligan...the LONE STAR GUNSLINGERS! COLE A nice ovation for the stallions from the Lone Star State, Jock Mulligan and Baron Windels. VENTURA Baron Windels? That's gotta be a rib. It's like they took the first names of Barry Windham and Dustin Rhodes and put them together. On top of that, Baron's parents obviously were big fans of famed television producer Virgil Runnels' work, because it seems like they sliced his and Windham's last names together. Don't even get me started on Jock Mulligan. The only Jock I liked lived at Southfork. COLE It could've been worse, partner. Jock's first name could've been Blackjack. LIVE! OAOAST HELDDOWN~! AUBURN HILLS, MI COLE We're live across the country and in Canada on TSM. Michael Cole alongside Jesse "The Body" Ventura at Sofa Central. We thank you for making HeldDOWN~! apart of your Thursday night. Bohemoth and "The Texas Twister" Jock Mulligan set to start things off for their respective teams. * DING DING * The bell sounds and the match begins with a collar-and-elbow tie-up. Bo muscling Jock into the corner, and missing a roundhouse right as he tries landing a cheapshot on the Texas Twister. Living up to his nickname, Jock avoids the blow and rocks the big man with a fury of spinning right hands, followed by an armdrag that sends Bo across the ring. Bohemoth counters Mulligan's attempted dropkick by swatting him in midair like a fly. But just like every good cowboy, Jock gets right back up on the saddle, charging towards Bo, who lowers the shoulder and the boom with a shoulder block. VENTURA Ha-Ha. There's the star QB getting tackled by the all-pro linebacker right there. A smirk on his face and a bounce to his step, Bo returns to his corner as Jock confers with Baron in theirs, no doubt discussing how to attack Bohemoth. Jock keeps a close eye on Bo, who's getting his shoulders massaged from Christian Wright, as Baron whispers into his ear and pats him on the chest. Bo and Jock come out of their respective corners, loosening their arms before locking back up in the center of the ring. Jock quickly grabs a side headlock, which Bo just as quickly gets out of by shoving Jock to the ropes, catching him on the rebound with another punishing shoulder block. Bo slaps his thighs and then flaunts... VENTURA Check this out, Cole. ...TEH GUNZ~!, drawing a wry smile from the Texan. VENTURA If it weren't for Tony Brannigan, Bo would be the winner of the Jesse "The Body" Award every year. Check out the ammo on those guns, Cole. COLE I believe it's GUNZZZZZZZZ~!, Jesse. And it's going to take more than an impressive physique to advance to the next round. VENTURA I can't believe Jock wants to lock up with Bo again. Bo's already killed him two times and he still wants more. COLE It's all about the spirit of competition. And it's all about earning a shot at the World Tag Team Titles at Anglemania V, the largest spectale in all of parody e-fed entertainment. For the thrid time in the match, Jock and Bo lock up, with Bo once again overpowering the Texas Twister. Having trapped Mulligan against the ropes Bo slowly eases up, putting his hands in the air to show referee Billy Silverman he won't try anything funny. He's right. He doesn't try anything funny but downright brutal, sneaking in a forearm shot! Bo fires Jock to the far corner and follows in, hitting nothing but turnbuckle as Jock avoids a corner clothesline. The Texas Twister measures Bo up as the big man stumbles out of the corner in a confused state, again successfully ultilizing an armdrag takeover before knocking Bo off his feet with a dropkick. COLE It could be over early! Jock going for the cover! VENTURA Excellent strategy. You're gonna have to go through 4 teams to win it all, and the faster you're able to win your match, the less punishment you take. ONE... T-- KICKOUT! Not even a two count, as Bo PRESSES Jock over the body of Billy Silverman. Jock pops up to his feet and hits the ropes, but Bo is ready. Or so we think. Bo tips his hand, setting early for a bodydrop, which Jock counters with a sunset flip. Bo struggles to keep his footing, trying to pull himself and Jock to the ropes using brute strength. He doesn't get the chance to make it to the ropes as the other Gunslinger, Baron Windels, steps in and levels Bo with a RUNNING LARIAT! COLE What quick thinking by Windels. He comes in and does what he has to do, then exits immediately after so he won't keep the referee occupied with him. ONE... TWO... NO! Christian Wright steps in and kicks Jock in the face with the flat of the boot. CUE: PIER-SIX BRAWL. Baron Windels returns to the ring and uses his reach advantage to deck The Natural with a hard right hand, then follows it up with a BONIC ELBOW! VENTURA Awww, look at this. I came here to call a wrestling match, Cole. The Gunslingers know they can't wrestle with Christian Wright and Bohemoth, so they're turning the match into a barroom brawl. The Lone Star Gunslingers send the team of Christian Wright and Bohemoth reeling. They corner Wright and Bo in opposite sides of the ring, drilling them with Texas right hands before firing them towards each other. Christian and Bo collide violently in the center of the ring, causing Wright to 360 in the air. Bohemoth, meanwhile, remains mid-ring, jelly-legged as he tries to shake off the cobwebs. Jock and Baron make eye contact, nodding to one another as they lunge at Bo and hammer him with stereo right hands before whipping him to the ropes. COLE Oh, my! That's no unidenified flying object, ladies and gentlemen. That's a 6'7", 284 Bohemoth orbiting the sky! After a back bodydrop, the Lone Star Gunslingers clothesline Bo over the top rope to the floor, then nail Christian Wright with a DOUBLE DROPKICK! COLE The Lone Star Gunslingers looking very impressive in the early going. VENTURA You hit the nail right on the head, Michael Cole. The Gunslingers have looked impressive early. As the old saying goes, "It ain't over till it's over." Bo wants no part of Christian's help outside as he shoves him out of the way and dives back into the ring. He goes straight for Jock, no selling a kick to the midsection as he grabs Jock by the back of the head and drives a knee into the gut. Enraged, Bo biels Jock to the corner and punishes the Gunslinger with a combination of roundhouse rights and knees to the midsection. He whips Mulligan to the far corner and connects with a corner clothesline. Bo destroys Jock wobbling out of the corner with a STIFF~! LARIAT that he follows up with a succession of elbows across the sternum, then the cover. ONE... TWO-- KICKOUT! Bo picks Jock up by the hair and shoots him to the ropes, MILITARY PRESSING-- Jock counters with a midair dropkick and makes the tag to his partner Baron Windels! Baron scales the turnbuckles and connects with a TOP ROPE LARIAT! Both men pop back up to their feet, with Windels nailing Bo with another lariat. VENTURA He ain't goin' down easy, Cole. Baron hits the ropes again...and gets kneed in the back by Christian Wright on the apron! Baron lunges forward, grabbing his lower back and eats a STIFF~! LARIAT from Bohemoth! Bo poses over Windels, grunting angerily. He tags Wright in for the first time. The Moral Highground looks down on Baron the way he does everyone else, an arrogant smirk on his face. Like his partner moments ago, Wright stands over Baron, SLAPPING him insultingly across the face as he lectures the Texan on morality before stomping Windels in the sternum. Wright picks Baron off the mat and rams him into the top turnbuckle. He backs Windels in the corner and drives the shoulder into the midsection, asking Baron if he thinks he's "so hot now," a reference to the Lone Star Gunslingers being quite popular with the ladies, as he slaps him. COLE Is there any need for this? VENTURA What? It's trash-talking, Cole. It goes on in every sport. COLE Slapping your opponent goes on in every sport? Come on. Wright wraps his arms around the big Texan and brings him out of the corner with a beautifully executed belly-to-belly suplex. ONE... TWO... KICKOUT! Not wanting to give his opponent anytime to catch his breath, Wright applies a reverse chinlock right after the two count. A rest hold this ain't, as Baron quickly rises to his feet and fires a series of elbows to CW's kidneys, breaking the hold. Baron hits the ropes, charging right back towards Wright who drops down, letting Windels go over the top, who makes a blind tag. Christian gets up, unbeknownst a tag was made, so when he sees Baron coming back at him full speed ahead he leapfrogs over the Texan. He may have gotten some cooperation from Baron himself, as Windels went down low to keep his 6'7" frame from hitting Wright in the groin. But it's all part of the Lone Star Gunslingers plan. Baron avoids a clothesline on the rebound and along with Jock nail Wright with STEREO DROPKICKS! COLE Tag team wrestling at its very best. Great double-team maneuver from the Lone Star Gunslingers. Jock with the cover! ONE... TWO... TH--SHOULDER UP! The Gunslingers with a quick tag. They shoot Wright off to the ropes and deck him with a double reverse back elbow. Baron scoopes Christian up and sits him on the top turnbuckle, then perches himself on the middle turnbuckle for a superplex. But Bohemoth steps in, clobbering Baron with a shot to the back and then scooping him up from behind for a back suplex thats impact echos throughout the Palace of Auburn Hills. As the referee escorts Bo back to his corner, Christian scales to the top, poised to hit the HOLY GRAIL....until Jock rushes over from the apron and SHOVES Wright off! He sprints back to his corner, slapping the top turnbuckle to let his partner know where to come to, along with getting the fans involved. VENTURA That's cheap, Cole -- pushing a man off the top rope like that. That dumb Jock couldn't face Christian Wright like a man, so he blindsided him. COLE What about Bohemoth? VENTURA What about Bo? COLE He hit Baron from behind. VENTURA That's different. He dropped Windels in the ring; he didn't throw him from the turnbuckle to the floor outside. What Jock did could've caused Wright to break his neck or cripple himself. Baron gets to his feet, a bit groggy but enough left in the tank to make the t-- No, Christian grabs his leg, but Baron yanks it away and somersaults to his corner and tags Jock. The Texas Twister drills Wright with a discus punch, as well as Bo on the apron. As Jock nears Christian, Wright grabs the top of his trunks and flings him outside. Jock dusts himself off and climbs up the turnbuckles. FLYING LARIAT! ONE... TWO... TH-- KICKOUT! Amped up by the crowd reaction Jock is unable to remain composed, letting his adreanline lead him. He hits the ropes and gets hit with a clubbering shot to the back of the head by Bohemoth. What occurs next is a 1-2 punch that may be too much to overcome, as Christian Wright drills Jock with a... VENTURA WHAM! ...SUPERKICK square to the jaw! ONE... Baron sticks a foot into the ring. TWO... Baron's body is now halfway through the ropes. Can he break up the pin in time? THREE! NOOOOOOOOOOO! "YEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" COLE I can't believe Jock kicked out! VENTURA Neither can I. Wright connected flush with the superkick, but somehow the Texican managed to kickout. What incredible action, Michael Cole. Wright brings Jock up to his feet and sends him face-first into the knee of Bohemoth, then tags out. Bo scoopes Jock up and plants him into the canvas with a RUNNING POWERSLAM. VENTURA Big running power bodyslam by Bo. That knocked the air out of Jock for sure. There's the cover. ONE... TWO... TH-- KICKOUT! Bo sits Jock up and applies...the NERVE PINCH! Jock kicks the canvas with his heels, pumping his fists to continue the blood flow. His fellow Texan shouting words of encouragement from the apron, rallying the fans behind the Texas Twister. Jock struggles to retain consciousness as his eyes becoming heavy, the nerve pinch beginning to cut the flow of oxygen to the body. The fans stomp their feet and clap their hands to help Jock stay up but it's not enough. Billy Silverman lifts Jock's right arm up and drops it. ONE... Silverman checks the arm again. And again it drops. TWO... VENTURA This is it, Cole. If the arm goes down a third time the match is over. COLE Will the third time be the charm? Arm goes up, arm goes down. NO! Jock musters a last second power surge, keeping the arm up. The roar of the crowd and his adreanline send Jock into overdrive. He rises up to his feet and drills Bo in the midsection with a pair of elbows and hits the ropes. Flying lariat...countered into a FRONT SPINEBUSTER! COLE Oh, my! That may have done it right there, Jesse. Every time Jock has shown signs of life, the team of Christian Wright and Bohemoth have managed to cut him off at the legs. VENTURA Bo caught Jock in midair and planted him into the mat with the spinebuster. Excellent counter. ONE... TWO... THR-- Baron comes in and makes the save, stomping Bo in the head to break up the pin. Billy Silverman escorts Baron back to his corner as Bo presses Jock overhead, Christian Wright slapping Bo on the chest to tag himself in. Bo drops Jock down onto the knee of Christian, who hoists Mulligan over his shoulder blades in a fireman's carry position and flips over with him. HONOR ROLL! ONE... TWO... THR-- Baron once again breaks up the pin, pulling Christian off Jock. Wright doesn't care much for Baron's actions, but he stays focus on the task at hand, going behind Jock and taking him up in the air for a high angle back suplex known to many fans as the SAITO SUPLEX! CW pops up and taunts the crowd, then cheapshots Baron off the apron and quickly goes for the pin. ONE... TWO... THR-- KICKOUT! VENTURA Brilliant move on the part of Christian. He didn't get the pin, but Baron had broken up his team's last couple of pin attempts, so he took him out of the picture. That's why he's the Moral Highground. COLE Cheapshotting another person doesn't sound too moral to me. VENTURA According to 50% of the American people, you ain't got no morals, Cole. You and Los Diablos de Fuego are left on your own island. Wright and Bo make an exchange. Bo scoopes Jock up and drives him hard into the corner, ramming his shoulder into the midsection of Mulligan. He picks Jock up and rams him into he and Christian's corner, and tags the Natural back in. Wright places Jock in a front facelock as he leaps onto the second turnbuckle and takes the Texas Twister over with a TORNADO DDT! ONE... TWO... THREE-- NO! A hint of frustration begins to show on the face of Christian Wright, who brings Jock back to a vertical base so he can flip him over with a dragon screw legwhip. Wright then drags Jock by the leg towards the edge of the ring, where he places that very leg on the bottom rope and crashes all his weight down on it with a sit-down cannonball ala Ric Flair. Jock holds onto his leg in agony, gritting his teeth. Wright grabs the leg tugs on it before slapping on the FIGURE-FOUR LEG-- NO! Jock uses his free leg to shove Wright forward, sending the Natural running to the ropes and over on the rebound with a one-legged monkey flip. Both men rush to their feet, with Christian being the fastest as he's the fresher man. Wright nails Jock with a series of knees to the midsection, then looks to hit a Uranage Suplex, but Jock counters with hard elbows to the side of the head. Christian takes a wild swing at Jock's head, but Jock grabs the arm and counters with a FLOATOVER DD... BACKSLIDE!? ONE... TWO... THR-- NO! Wright rolls through and sends Mulligan straight back with a running STO! COLE That HAD to do it. ONE... TWO... THR-- NO, KICKOUT! "YEEEEAAAAHHHHH" The frustration on the part of Christian grows with each passing second. Wright looks to the big gun, Bohemoth, his own personal clean-up hitter to come in and drive the match home. Bo happily accepts the tag and circles his fallen opponent like a vulture stalking its prey. Bo scoopes Jock up, waistlocking the Texas Twister and ramming him into the 3 corners not occupied by Baron Windels, before settling in the center of the ring where he tries earning a submission by squeezing the life out of his opponent with a BEARHUG! VENTURA Oh, and what a painful hold this is. When I die I want it to be quick and painless, everything the bearhug isn't. I've seen guys pass out many-a times from having the air squeezed out of them. *clap*clap**clap*clap**clap* Baron and the crowd get behind Jock, still very much aware of his surrounds. Jock tries penetrating Bo's death grip by slipping his hand between the arms of Bo, but they're too massive to get through. A headbutt stuns Jock more than it does his monster opponent. Facing defeat right in the face Jock has no choice but to make a last ditch effort to escape, cocking his right hand and placing Bo in the IRON CLAW! COLE THE IRON CLAW! THE IRON CLAW! THE IRON CLAW! A hold made legendary by the famous Von Erich family. Bo steps back, widening his stance as he tries muscling his way out of the Claw hold. Jock keeps tinkering with his grip of the hold, in part due to fatigue and the sweat running down Bo's face. Bo gets a shot of adreanline and swipes Jock's arm away, then destroys him with a YAKUZA KICK! After shaking away the cobwebs Bo glances over to Christian Wright in the corner. THUMBS UP? No. THUMBS DOWN~! A cocky smirk etched on the face of Bo, he scoopes Jock up in a fallaway slam position then swings him around. EROTIC AWAKENING OF B... ...COUNTERED INTO A DDT! "YYYEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" VENTURA That's the first time I've seen that move countered, Cole. COLE What an unbelieveable counter to the Erotic Awakening Of B. The crowd is on their feet, cheering Jock on. Can he make the tag? Both he and Bo are down. Who will be the first to make the tag? VENTURA Both of their partners are ready to come in. If you didn't know before how much these teams wanted to win the 2006 Anderson Cup, you do now. They both want that shot at the World Tag Team Titles at AngleMania V. Jock claws his way to his corner inch by dramatic inch, while Bo remains floored following the DDT. He starts to stir just as Jock nears his corner, Baron awaiting with his arm outstretched as far as it can without letting go of the tag rope. Jock reaches out and...MAKES THE TAG! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" And here comes Baron, a house afire. Coming off the top rope and leveling Bo with a flying lariat. He decks Christian Wright with a hard right. Windels knocks Bo back off his feet with a dropkick. Wright tries sneaking up behind Baron, only to get nailed in the gut with a back-kick followed by an inverted atomic drop and bionic elbow. What Christian failed at, Bo doesn't. He hammers Windels in the back of the neck with a forearm smash. Baron backed into the corner and worked over with knees into the midsection. Bo whips Windels to the far corner, following in and eating a BIG BOOT to the face. Baron pulls himself onto the middle turnbuckle as Wright charges towards him, connecting with a diving shoulder block that sends CW rolling out of the ring. Bo is placed in a front facelock, and as Baron leaves his feet for a leaping DDT, Bo SLAMS him straight down to the mat! Bo then lifts Baron up for what appears to be a vertical suplex, then drops him sideways with the Falcon Arrow he calls the "BO & ARROW"! VENTURA And that'll do it. All Bo has to do is cover the big Texican. But he isn't! COLE Oh, no! Bo deciding to go for it all right here. Powerbomb coming up. Really? Nope. As Bo sets to lift Baron up in the air, Jock leaps off the top rope with his right palm coming down over the head of Bo. IRON CLAW! VENTURA He's got Bo in the Claw hold again. But he ain't the legal man. The referee oughta do his job and get that big dumb Jock out of the ring. Don't he know the rules?! Christian Wright sneaks back into the ring, creeping up behind Jock and nailing...BO WITH THE SUPERKICK! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" VENTURA Whoa! He hit Bo. Christian Wright accidently nailed his own partner with the superkick! COLE Jock felt Wright sneaking up on him and moved out of the way. But that big Bohemoth didn't go down, Jesse. He's still on his feet! VENTURA Just barely. Christian can't believe what happened, his hands over his head. Jock turns Wright around and hammers him with the discus punch as Baron catches a groggy Bohemoth with a RUNNING BULLDOG! ONE... TWO... THREE! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAHHHHHH!" * DING DING DING DING * COLE They did it! VENTURA Major upset, Cole! Baron pops up and holds his arms up in victory. Jock leaps into his arms and the two share a celebratory huge in the center of the ring as "The Good, the Bad and the Ugly" theme plays in the background. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, the winners and advancing to the semifinals of the 2006 Anderson Cup...THE LONE STAR GUNSLINGERRRRRRSSSSSSSS! COLE What a thriller at the Palace, Jesse. VENTURA There haven't been that many here since the Pistons are crushing everybody. COLE (CONT'D) Jock and Baron have advanced by beating Christian Wright and Bohemoth. Let's take a look back at some of the action that took place in this match with our replay sponsered by NRG supplements and power drinks. * REPLAY * VENTURA (Voice-Over) As you can see, CW and Bo had the match won until that Jock Mulligan, the ILLEGAL man, came off the top with the Claw hold onto Bohemoth. Christian tries to help his partner, but that backfires as Jock hears the footsteps fastly approaching and lets Bo take the superkick met for him. He then takes care of Wright as Baron comes back to nail Bo with the bulldog for the 1-2-3. Not a good night for The Upstarts. The Lone Star Gunslingers advance to meet #1 seed in the MWC Conference Black T. * END REPLAY * We cut to Cole and Ventura at Sofa Central. Jesse wipes the beads of sweat on his forehead with Michael Cole's tie. COLE Gee, thanks. VENTURA No problem. COLE I should also thank you for coming out here... VENTURA ...And making you look good? COLE (chuckles) It's truly been an honor. VENTURA It should be. I ain't The Coach or Caboose. This is Jesse "The Body" Ventura. And as always, it's been YOUR pleasure. COLE Fans, we still have more to come. Stay with us. Commercial Break Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 COLE Welcome back, fans. Unfortunately, I am sorry to announce that our scheduled main event this week, Leon Rodez vs. Dan Black, will be postponed due to transportation problems. As I said previously, that match WILL take place next week on HD, so make sure to catch that, the big 5-on-5 Survivor Series style match, and the final two first round Anderson Cup matches, which are: In the LI bracket: #3 Sk8ter Boiz vs. #6 NRG In the MWC bracket: #3 The Love Doctors vs. #6 Team Heyross. But to end the show tonight, we go into the OAOAST Archives and go back to last year's AnglePalooza. One week from Sunday, Peter Knight defends the World Title against Stephen Joseph in an "I Quit" match, but last year, Drek Stone did the same. His opponent, AJ Flaire. Enjoy and we'll see you next week. *WHOOOOOOSH~!* Originally aired: January 30th, 2005 *DING! DING! DING!* Drek begins walking over to AJ Flaire with his arm extended and a wide grin on his face. CABOOSE See, look at this. Drek Stone wants a friendly handshake before this match starts off. How could you not respect that? COLE Just so everyone knows, the two combatants have been gimmicked with mini-microphones at the start of this match. They can turn them on whenever they want to speak. This way, they can have the crowd hear them without constantly having to pick up a microphone. COACH Well, that's certainly convenient. COLE Less writing involved too. As Drek gets nearer to AJ, he suddenly gets ROCKED with a huge right hand from the challenger! The fans explode as Drek Stone stumbles back. AJ runs forward and hits him with another HARD right hand! And another! And another! The Heavyweight Champion falls into the ropes as AJ Flaire pummels him with a barrage of fists to the head. He then steps back and…. *SMACK* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” …..unleashes a stinging chop across the chest of Drek Stone. AJ steps back once again… *SMACK* “WOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” ….and another chop! Drek instinctively reaches for his chest to soothe the stinging, but this allows AJ Flaire the chance to hit Drek Stone with a NASTY European Uppercut across the jaw. The impact of the blow sends the Heavyweight Champion over the top rope and to the arena floor! COLE AJ Flaire is on FIRE in the early goings of this match! COACH Drek Stone should have never revealed AJ’s condition earlier tonight. That just made AJ Flaire more motivated to end this match as early as possible. As Drek starts to stand on the floor, AJ refuses to give him a chance to breathe. Without hesitation, The Phenomenal One runs across the ring and dives between the middle and top ropes with a plancha, BRINGING BOTH HIM AND DREK STONE BACK DOWN TO THE FLOOR!! The fans explode as AJ gets back up immediately and salutes them with a powerful fist in the air. Drek starts making an attempt to crawl away, but AJ stops him by grabbing a strong hold of his hair and forcing back up to his feet. Once he does so, AJ grabs him by his arm and gives him a hard irish whip! Drek Stone goes running into the stairs -- and hits KNEES-FIRST, sending him propelling over the stairs and back onto the floor! “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” CABOOSE Oh, to hell with this! I don’t care what AJ Flaire does here! He will never, ever make Drek Stone quit! Never! COACH What if he asks Drek Stone, “Do you quit?”, and Drek answers back “DO I QUIT?! DO I QUIT?!” Technically, he would be saying the wor- CABOOSE Don’t even finish that sentence. I can’t listen to this drivel now. Right after hitting the stairs and winding up back on the floor, Drek tries making a desperate attempt to crawl away. But, of course, there’s AJ Flaire behind him, ready to stalk the champion. Once he gets close enough to Drek Stone, AJ grabs a nearby camera cord and wraps it around the Italian Stallion’s throat. The fans start cheering as Drek tries frantically to unwrap the cord, but AJ only tightens his grip. He then forces Drek back up to his feet, grabs him by the seat of his pants -- and FLINGS HIM into the metal turnbuckle post! Drek hits the corner post chest first, then goes rolling back to the floor. COLE I think we can now safely say this isn’t going to be your typical wrestling match, folks. CABOOSE Well, what in the HELL helped you reach that conclusion? With the Heavyweight Champion now on the arena floor, trying to regain his wits, the challenger takes a walk to the timekeeper’s table, forcing the announcer to vacate his chair for the second time since Thursday. AJ immediately folds the chair up and walks over to Drek with it. As Drek slowly starts to stand, AJ swings the chair forward -- -- and winds up hitting the steel post! The fans let out a disappointed sigh as the *CLANG* of metal hitting metal echoes in the building. With Flaire sidetracked for a second, this gives Drek the chance to hit him with a well-placed boot to the midsection. The force of the kick causes AJ to drop the chair -- and allows Drek the opportunity to pick it up instead. CABOOSE Yes! Now it’s time for this match to really start! As AJ rests on one knee, Drek starts to pick the chair up over his head. Once Flaire is up, the Heavyweight Champion swings the chair…. …..but AJ Flaire jumps up and hits the chair with a spinning heel kick, SMASHING IT INTO DREK STONE’S FACE INSTEAD! “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!” Drek immediately falls down to the arena floor as the fans explode in support of The Phenomenal One. COLE What a HUGE move AJ Flaire just hit already! That could have done some MAJOR damage! CABOOSE Come on, Drek! You need to get into this match! With Drek’s brains already scrambled at this point, he’s easy pickings for AJ to pick up and roll back into the ring. Once he does so, Drek immediately scampers over to a corner on the other side of the ring, and tries standing with the use of the ropes. AJ slides back into the ring and walks to meet Stone -- but gets a surprise kick to the midsection! AJ doubles over for a second, but then walks back over to Drek -- and gets another kick to the stomach. With Flaire stunned for the moment, Drek hops up to the second rope. He braces himself to jump off…. …..but AJ suddenly hits him with a high dropkick! Drek starts teetering back, looking off-balance, as the fans start screaming for him to fall. After a moment of teasing the crowd, Drek grabs a hold of the ropes and keeps himself perched on the turnbuckle. This gives AJ the chance to put his palm on the side of Stone’s head and SHOVE him off the turnbuckle! Drek goes hurtling over the top rope and DOWN TO THE ARENA FLOOR! Once again, this gets another huge pop! COLE OH MY GOD! WHAT A HUGE FALL! TWENTY! MAYBE THIRTY FEET! COACH Cole, it was only like an eight foot drop! Hard fall, yeah, but still. COLE FORTY FEET!! The fans start seriously clapping for AJ Flaire as the camera gets a closer look at the champ’s condition. That shove off the top rope has definitely had an effect on Drek Stone as he lays prone on the arena floor. COACH This isn’t good. Drek Stone hasn’t moved an inch since he fell off the turnbuckle. CABOOSE …..no. No, this isn’t good at all. COACH I mean, on the bright side, if you’re unconscious, you can’t really say “I Quit.” But I doubt you want things to go that way. As Drek continues to lay outside the ring, AJ moves over to a nearby turnbuckle with a wry grin on his face. The fans start to buzz, realizing that he might have something special planned here. Sure enough, AJ starts to climb up the ropes until he gets to the top. COLE What in the hell could AJ Flaire be preparing for here?! CABOOSE This is stupid! We know the condition his back is in! Why go for something like this?! Once AJ gets to the top rope, he stands for a moment and looks out to the crowd. They’re obviously loving it at the moment. He then glances at Drek Stone, who has still not moved since he fell off the top. AJ then gives a slight nod of his head and braces himself. HE JUMPS OFF THE TOP ROPE WITH AN ELBOWDROP -- -- BUT DREK STONE ROLLS OUT OF THE WAY! AND AJ FLAIRE HITS THE ARENA FLOOR, COMPLETELY MISSING THE ELBOWDROP ALL TOGETHER! COACH OUCH!!! Immediately after hitting the floor, AJ screams out in pain and rolls along with the momentum of the move. He quickly puts a hand out to touch his back, but thinking better of it, then takes the hand away just as quickly. Instead, he starts to moan instead, clutching the back of his head, which was hurt in the impact of the fall as well. “HOLY SHIT!” “HOLY SHIT!” “HOLY SHIT!” CABOOSE What did I tell you guys?! It is BEYOND stupid to take such a risk! I knew it. And now AJ Flaire is learning it as well. COLE And quite honestly, you really can’t make stupid mistakes like that when you’re fighting Drek Stone. CABOOSE Exactly. Both men lay on the floor for a second, until Drek Stone finally starts to stir first by rolling onto his knees. Meanwhile, AJ is slowly starting to move up as well. CABOOSE Do you see how smart he is? Playing possum, knowing that AJ was going to do something stupid like jump off the top rope. He KNOWS his opponents better than they know themselves. Once Drek Stone manages to get to his feet, albeit holding his head, he picks up the steel chair folded up nearby him. He picks it up and holds it in his hands, waiting for AJ to get up. Once the challenger manages to get to a standing position, Drek simply hurls the chair at him! The steel chair BOUNCES off AJ Flaire’s head, with the impact of it sending AJ falling back into the ringside barricade. Drek allows himself to smile as AJ finds himself dazed, only helped by the fact that the barricade is there to keep him standing. Drek then charges at AJ Flaire -- BUT GETS BACK-BODY DROPPED OVER THE BARRICADE AND INTO THE CROWD!! COACH Well, will you look at that! AJ Flaire knows how to play possum too! COLE If there’s one place Drek Stone shouldn’t want to be right now, it’s with this crowd! Right after the back-body drop, AJ instinctively clutches his back once again, but takes his hand away as soon as he realizes what he’s doing. As Drek lays stunned on the floor, AJ swings his legs over the barricade to follow after him. A fan sitting nearby hands AJ his soft drink cup, begging him to use it. FAN Come on, man! USE IT! USE IT! AJ Wait! Wait………what kind of drink is this? FAN Mountain Dew. AJ Yes! Perfect! With the drink in his hand, AJ then stands over Drek’s body. AJ Drek, do you quit?! DO YOU QUIT?! Drek starts to pick himself off the floor, but keeping his eyes locked on AJ. DREK Kiss my ass, AJ! I’ll never quit! AJ Flaire then pours the entire drink over Drek’s head, prompting a wild reaction from the crowd. DREK Mountain Dew?! Oh, that’s disgusting! You’re SICK! Feeling such a vile liquid splash on his face, Drek finds himself compelled to stand up - and now. Meanwhile, another ringside fan hands AJ Flaire another object. This time, it looks to be a special-edition Hoff dogtag. AJ takes the chain, wraps it around his fist, and waits for Drek to stand. Once the Heavyweight Champion gets to a standing position, AJ Flaire WALLOPS him in the face with said dogtag! The impact of it sends Drek falling back over the barricade and near the ring again. CABOOSE Hoff dogtag?! Who would buy such a thing now?! Once Drek falls back on the other side, he starts trying to crawl away once again. This time, the camera catches a good glimpse of his face -- and finds it has been busted open by that chain shot just a moment ago. The fans “ooh” at seeing the violent gash opened along Drek’s forehead, but cheer as they see AJ climb over the barricade again. He picks Drek up off the floor and immediately hooks him into a cradle piledriver position. COLE Whoa! Could he be going for it?! CABOOSE No! No! Not on the outside of the ring! Don’t do this! The fans really start to buzz as AJ hooks Drek Stone up for That’s Phenomenal. Once he gets him in position, he waits for a moment to brace his strength. He then lifts Drek Stone up -- -- NO! Drek manages to pull his weight down and keep himself on the ground! The Heavyweight Champion then quickly breaks the grip, grabs AJ by his neck, and DRIVES him down to the floor with a flatliner! The crowd groans as Flaire’s head sickly bounces off the concrete. Right after the move, Drek sits up for a few moments and calmly wipes the blood out of his eyes. CABOOSE Did you see that impact?! I know I said this earlier, but NOW -- NOW is the time this match is ready to begin. As Drek starts to stand, he spots AJ instinctively nursing his back, but then quickly putting an end to it. COACH Uh oh. With a smile on his face, Drek nods in AJ’s direction. He then immediately runs forward and drops an elbow drop on AJ’s spine! The fans groan as AJ howls at the pain. Drek gets back up and drops another elbow drop quickly! And another one! And another! And another! After the fifth elbow drop, Drek stands up with a WIDE grin on his face. He then drops a SIXTH elbow drop on AJ Flaire’s back. Finally, he picks the challenger’s body up off the floor and rolls him into the ring. CABOOSE This thing is about to get really ugly. I can feel it. After rolling AJ Flaire back into the ring, Drek follows after him with the steel chair in his hand. AJ uses the ring ropes to pull himself back up as quickly as possible, but Drek is waiting. Standing right behind him. Once AJ’s up, Drek swings the chair and…. *CLANG* Hits AJ Flaire across the back with the steel chair! The crowd groans as Flaire’s body shakes and he simply sinks down onto his knees. Drek starts urging AJ to get back up again. Almost daring him to do so, Drek waits with the steel chair by his side. Finally, after a few moments of struggling, AJ Flaire moves back up to his feet. That’s when Drek picks up the chair again and… *CLANG* SMACKS AJ WITH THE CHAIR AGAIN! The force of this chairshot sends AJ falling into the ropes. With a cocky grin, Drek moves towards AJ and gives the challenger a well-placed slap to the face. He then takes Flaire’s arms, places them upon the top rope, and wraps the middle one over the top, effectively tying AJ in the ropes. COLE Oh, this isn’t good! Somebody needs to free AJ Flaire from this. And quickly! Drek Stone grabs his trusty steel chair and rolls to the outside. The fans really start booing as Drek steps behind AJ’s prone body with the chair in his hand. Although he isn’t supposed to, the referee starts making a valiant attempt to free AJ from his predicament. But Drek isn’t having any of it. From the outside of the ring, he swings the chair back and… *CLANG* CRACKS THE STEEL CHAIR AGAINST THE EXPOSED BACK OF AJ FLAIRE! “OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!” The force of that chairshot propels AJ’s body forward, freeing his arms and causing him to fall flat on his face in the ring. With a nod, Drek looks out at the crowd and slaps his chest arrogantly, really receiving their outrage in return. “DREK STONE SUCKS!” “DREK STONE SUCKS!” “DREK STONE SUCKS!” COLE That was uncalled for! CABOOSE I agree. This chant is simply awful! With AJ rolling around the ring, Drek tosses the chair over the top rope and rolls in after it. AJ rolls over to a nearby corner and sits up against the bottom turnbuckle. Meanwhile, on the other side of the ring, Drek stands proud. Defiant. With his arms folded across his chest, the champion glances at his now-wounded challenger. DREK AJ….look at you. AJ Flaire takes a huge gulp of air and warily stares at his opponent. DREK Look at you. You’re nothing. You can’t compete anymore tonight. You can barely even walk! Drek slowly starts to walk towards AJ now. DREK So here’s what I’m going to do. A little proposition. You know you can’t beat me. I know you can’t beat me. Everyone here knows you can’t beat me. You wouldn’t have been able to do it in your prime. And you absolutely have no chance now. Drek methodically wipes the blood off his forehead as he continues to talk. DREK So this is the plan. Quit now. Quit right at this very moment, in front of all these people. And never come back. NEVER! COME! BACK! Let this be the last time I ever see you step foot in this federation. And I will let you limp away, still able to leave under your own power. Now standing directly in front of AJ Flaire, Drek Stone symbolically looks down at him. DREK But if you decide to continue this match -- if you decide to keep fighting -- that is it. I will have absolutely zero mercy for you. I will make it so you CAN’T walk out of here. You thought what Hoff did to your back last time was bad? Well, I’m bigger and badder than Hoff could ever hope to be! You will regret it for the rest of your life if you continue to fight. I promise you. So AJ, make your decision now. AJ wipes the sweat off his forehead but continues to stare at Drek, not wanting to take his eyes off him. DREK Make your decision now. This is all in your hands. Without saying a word, AJ places his hands on the top rope and uses it to pull himself back up to a standing position. Now standing face-to-face with Drek Stone, AJ stands before him solemnly. Still silent. DREK What are you going to do, AJ? Don’t be stupid. Make the right decision. AJ starts to slowly nod his head as a wide smile crosses Drek’s face. DREK I knew it. Oh, I knew it. Just say the words, AJ. Say it for me. The crowd waits anxiously for AJ to make his decision. AJ Fine, Drek. Fine. You want those two words? You want to hear them so bad? Well then, here you go. ….. AJ FUCK. YOU. “YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!” AJ runs out of the corner and brings Drek Stone down with a HUGE clothesline! Drek Stone immediately pops back up afterwards and AJ brings him down with ANOTHER mighty clothesline! Once Drek gets back up after that, AJ gives him a kick to the midsection! He grabs him in a front facelock position -- AND DRIVES HIM DOWN WITH A BIG DDT!! The fans roar as AJ holds onto Drek’s head following the DDT, locking him into a front face choke. COLE WHOA! THIS COULD BE IT, RIGHT NOW! CABOOSE NO! COME ON, DREK! GET OUT OF THIS! Drek tries pummeling Flaire’s ribs to get him to let up on the hold, but AJ only grabs a tighter grip of the hold and rocks back. Seething through his teeth, The Phenomenal One growls at his opponent. AJ You wanted ME to say it?! YOU SAY IT!! SAY IT, DREK!! SAY IT!! DREK Oh, you can KISS MY ASS, AJ! This inspires AJ Flaire to only tighten up on the front facelock even further. The cheers surging from the crowd only rise even further as Drek starts waving his hands, trying to get some kind of advantage. COACH DREK HAS TO QUIT! HE’S GOING TO QUIT RIGHT HERE! Drek starts getting a little weaker as AJ cinches up on the hold. His arms slowly start to fall to his side -- but in a last ditch effort, he rolls over and manages to roll into the ring ropes. He slides his legs out underneath the bottom rope and hook his feet against the apron. Drek then tries making a serious attempt to pull himself out of the ring -- but AJ just keeps clinging on! Finally, with one last serious pull, Drek pushes himself out of the ring! AJ DOES manage to hang on…..but as the two fall to the arena floor, the impact forces him to let go of the hold. CABOOSE Oh, thank god! Thank god! Immediately upon impact, Drek rolls over and starts massaging his neck. Wanting to get away from AJ as soon as possible, Drek tries rolling up onto his knees and back to his feet. Yet, there’s AJ waiting once again. He slips behind Drek and wraps him up in a sleeper hold! The crowd starts cheering as AJ jumps up onto Drek’s back and starts wrapping the hold in tighter. COLE AJ Flaire is doing anything he can to get Drek Stone to quit -- and quick! Drek tries ripping AJ’s arms away from his neck, but isn’t finding too much luck in doing so. So, Drek winds up doing the only thing he can do. He runs towards the corner post and turns his back to it -- sending AJ Flaire back-first into the post instead! The crowd lets out a collective sigh as AJ releases the hold and falls off Drek’s body to the ground. COACH And there goes Drek Stone targeting the back again. CABOOSE Well, what the hell else is he supposed to do?! This is smart! Afterwards, Drek Stone leans himself against the barricade and starts taking deep breaths. Finally, after resting for a moment, he picks AJ Flaire up off the floor and rolls him back into the ring, following after him. Nursing one hand on his back, AJ tries crawling away, but Drek simply walks easily after him. COLE Drek Stone is stalking AJ Flaire. That’s all he’s doing! After allowing AJ to waste his energy crawling for a few seconds, Drek grabs a nice handful of his hair and forces him back up. Drek then slips to the side of AJ Flaire, lifts him up and -- “OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” --drops him across his knee with a NASTY backbreaker! AJ begins screaming in loud pain and tries to roll away, but Drek keeps a solid hold of his opponent. Still holding onto AJ, he moves back up to his feet and walks around the ring for a second. He then drops down and -- “OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” --gets him with ANOTHER backbreaker! Through AJ Flaire’s screams, Drek picks him up again. And -- -- another backbreaker!! He picks him up a FOURTH time and…. *BAM* -- yet another backbreaker!! Finally, after this one, Drek allows AJ to fall to the mat. The challenger immediately lets out a deafening scream and clutches at his back anxiously. COLE Oh, I shudder to think about what Drek Stone might have just done to AJ Flaire’s back there. CABOOSE It’s a backbreaker, Cole. What do you think he could have done? AJ tries rolling around the ring, but Drek charges at him… …AND DROPS A KNEE ACROSS THE SPINE OF AJ FLAIRE! AJ lets out another loud scream and starts rolling across the mat without an actual purpose. Drek rolls back up, runs forward…. …AND DROPS ANOTHER KNEE ACROSS AJ FLAIRE’S BACK! The crowd, feeling a deep sense of empathy for AJ’s situation, moans along with him as he screams in pain. COACH This is…..this is awful. AJ Flaire can’t continue like this. CABOOSE So let him quit! He can end this anytime he wants! Content with seeing AJ really hurting, Drek takes this opportunity to step outside the ring. Despite the fans hurling insults at him, the champion simply ignores them and tries looking under the ring apron. After a few seconds, Drek pulls something out from underneath the apron and holds it up for the crowd. COACH Oh no! COLE It’s a Singapore cane! Who would put a Singapore cane underneath the ring?! “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” With the cane in his hand, Drek slides back into the ring and stands over AJ Flaire. Looking triumphant already, the champion starts twirling the stick in his hand, smiling over the entire situation. DREK AJ, this is it. I gave you the chance before to quit before I really hurt you. Now comes the pain. You can end it all if you say those two simple words. Drek lifts the Singapore cane high above his head. DREK Just say them. He SWINGS THE CANE DOWN -- BUT AJ CATCHES HIM WITH A PUNCH TO THE MIDSECTION! Drek doubles over for a second, which allows AJ the chance to run forward and bring him down with a VICIOUS SHINING WIZARD!! “YEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” COACH WHOA!! COLE AJ FLAIRE -- OUT OF NOWHERE -- WITH HIS TRUSTED SHINING WIZARD!! HOW DID HE DO IT?! Both men hit the ground after the move, with AJ Flaire obviously nursing his back, trying to will himself through this thing. COLE AJ Flaire will keep fighting! He won’t give up! COACH Well, Cole, if AJ won’t give up -- and Drek has made the promise that HE won’t give up -- how exactly will this match end? CABOOSE Oh, AJ will quit. He WILL quit. While Drek rolls around the ring holding his head, AJ starts using the ring ropes to pull himself up. Once he gets to his feet, he sees Drek Stone is still relatively stunned. Without wasting time, AJ walks over to a nearby turnbuckle and starts scaling it. Wincing with each growing pain in his back, AJ continues to climb the post until he gets to the top. COACH Why won’t he learn?! WHY DOES HE KEEP DOING THIS?! COLE This IS AJ Flaire! Always willing to take risks -- to take chances -- to pull the match out! He’s willing to do absolutely ANYTHING to win tonight. And folks, you really do just have to respect that. Perched upon the top rope, AJ waits for Drek Stone to fully stand up. But Drek, actually spotting AJ out of the corner of his eye, grabs a nearby Singapore cane and holds it in his grasp. Dizzily, the Heavyweight Champion finally manages to stand up -- but he turns and dashes forward to AJ. AND HE CRACKS THE SINGAPORE CANE OVER HIS HEAD!! “OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!” The crowd lets out a huge cry as AJ grabs his forehead and tumbles off the turnbuckle to the mat. COLE Oh no! Somebody should end this thing now! CABOOSE AJ can end it, Cole! He can end it himself! COLE He won’t. He has too much pride! CABOOSE Well, who’s fault is it if that pride costs him the ability to walk? Or the ability to see?! It’s not Drek Stone’s fault, I’ll tell you that! Drek Stone holds the Singapore cane high above his head as AJ rolls around on the mat, holding his head. Once he takes his hands off, the crowd can see that his forehead has now been brutally mangled thanks to that cane. Blood immediately starts to drip out of his forehead at an alarming rate, and Drek is loving every minute of it. DREK Come on, AJ. Say the words. Say them. AJ starts to stir a little bit and begins to roll over onto his side. COLE My god. How is he still able to go on like this?! Drek, looking absolutely shocked that AJ is starting to move onto his knees, lifts the cane above his head. DREK You don’t want to learn, do you? You just don’t want to learn? Well, here then. And Drek Stone swings the cane down! *CRACK!* The sound of wood hitting flesh echoes throughout the entire building! AJ screams and arches his back immediately as Drek twirls the cane in his hand. COACH Come on, AJ. This isn’t worth it anymore. It just isn’t. DREK Quit, AJ. Just quit. Say them. AJ Flaire, with fire in his eyes, looks up at Drek Stone defiantly. With blood starting to pour down his face, AJ spits a loogie into Drek’s face. The crowd bursts at such an action. “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” DREK How dare you! You piece of garbage! Drek lifts the cane up above his head again and… *CRACK!* Once again cracks it over AJ Flaire’s back. Just as before, AJ screams out in extreme pain and puts a hand against his back to alleviate the pain. DREK SAY IT!! THIS IS NOT A JOKE, AJ!! SAY THE DAMN WORDS!! AJ simply shows Drek Stone the middle finger. AJ Fuck. Off. “YEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!” Drek’s eyes immediately widen at AJ’s defiance and a sudden scowl creeps across his face. He lifts the cane up above his head and… *CRACK!* *CRACK!* *CRACK!* *CRACK!* COLE FOUR CONSECUTIVE SINGAPORE CANE SHOTS TO AJ FLAIRE‘S BACK! SOMEBODY NEEDS TO STOP THIS! With hurt in his eyes, AJ looks out at the crowd before falling face-first onto the mat. Unlike the AJ Flaire chants before, a new chant starts to rise up from the crowd. But this one is more subdued. Quieter, somehow. “PLEASE JUST QUIT!” “PLEASE JUST QUIT!” “PLEASE JUST QUIT!” But just as quickly, AJ starts pushing himself back off the mat with his arms. Despite the brutal welts across his back, despite the blood gushing out of his forehead, despite the fact that he’s been through more punishment in the past few minutes than any man deserves to be: AJ Flaire just keeps going. DREK You still won’t quit? STILL?! Once again, Drek lifts the cane up and… *CRACK!* …drives it across the back of AJ Flaire once more! COLE Come on, AJ. Just end it. CABOOSE AJ, Drek isn’t going to get tired of delivering those cane shots. Just end the damned match already. Noticing that AJ Flaire is still not willing to quit, Drek has finally had enough. He throws the cane down at his feet and steps outside the ring. Seeing the steel chair that was so popularly used before, he picks it up and throws it back into the ring. Following after it, Drek then symbolically unfolds the chair and places it in the center of the ring. Meanwhile, AJ lays in the center of the ring, still gasping for air. COACH Now what could Drek be planning to do with that? CABOOSE He’s going to make AJ say I-Quit. And that is ALL there is to it. Drek stares at the chair sitting in the ring for a second, then turns his attention to AJ Flaire. With the blood starting to dry around his eyes, Drek rubs his forehead to see if he could stop it from bleeding anymore. He then slowly starts to pry AJ off the mat. Flaire, with all the gashes now laced across his body, tries pushing his weight down, but it isn’t working. Drek finally gets AJ to stand -- but in a last ditch effort, AJ ROCKS Drek back with a BIG European Uppercut! COLE HOW?! Finding his opponent stunned for the moment, AJ quickly hooks him up in a cradle position. CABOOSE NO WAY! NO WAY IN HELL!! The fans roar as AJ picks Drek Stone up… ….AND DRIVES HIM DOWN WITH THAT’S PHENOMENAL!!! COLE OH MY GOD!! COACH THAT REALLY WAS PHENOMENAL!! Suddenly, the crowd has been invigorated! They start chanting his name once more. “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” “AJ FLAIRE!” COLE Suddenly the entire complexion of the match has changed! CABOOSE I…..I will never know how AJ Flaire just did that! DAMMIT! With adrenaline seemingly driving AJ Flaire at this point, he begins inching his way over to the ring ropes. Slowly, but surely, he starts using the ropes to pull himself back up to his feet. Meanwhile, Drek Stone is still laying on the mat, out cold. Once AJ Flaire gets fully back up, struggling the entire way, he spots the Singapore Cane laying near his feet. A smile crosses on his face like it’s Christmas morning, and his eyes start to glitter as he picks the cane up off the mat. Meanwhile, finally, Drek starts to stir. Like AJ earlier, Drek starts using the ropes to get himself up. Once he manages to get to his feet, Drek turns around so…. *CRACK* AJ FLAIRE COULD HIT HIM IN THE RIBS WITH THE SINGAPORE CANE!! CABOOSE NO! COME ON, AJ! COLE Turnabout is fair play! Drek Stone immediately doubles over, holding his ribs, as AJ stands before him with the cane in his hand. Literally sporting a crimson mask now, AJ scowls at Drek angrily, then steps back once again. *CRACK!* AJ FLAIRE HITS DREK STONE WITH THE CANE ONCE MORE! Once again, Drek Stone bends over to grab his side. This time, AJ takes the opportunity to bounce off the ropes with the cane in his hand. Once he bounces back, he swings the weapon…. …..but Drek scoops him up in a spinebuster position….. ….AND DROPS HIM WITH A SPINEBUSTER ONTO THE STANDING STEEL CHAIR!!! COLE NO!!!!!! CABOOSE Oh my god! COLE OH, NO!!! NO!!!!! COACH We need some help! The fans immediately hush as Drek Stone stands before a prone AJ Flaire. Following the spinebuster, the chair is a completely mangled mess. The legs have been bent in different directions, the seat has broken away from the skeleton of the chair -- and on top of it all is the wounded body of AJ Flaire. Upon this steel wreckage is a human being. A human being that has been through this all before. COLE I can’t believe it! The same move that took AJ Flaire out of commission for so long last time! COACH Guys….I really think AJ Flaire’s back could be broken again. COLE Well, thank god somebody has decided to send the EMTs out here. Sure enough, a wide barrage of medical personnel and ring agents start rushing to the ring to attend to the challenger. Two EMTs immediately bow near AJ’s head to check the condition of his neck, while two other paramedics do their best to clear out the wreckage of the steel chair. COLE Folks, this is just…..this is just awful. I don’t know what to say. Two more paramedics rush down to ringside with a stretcher and position themselves on the outside of the ring. Meanwhile, inside the ring is Drek Stone -- and he’s looking none too happy. DREK What the hell is everybody doing out here? YO! Drek grabs the collar of one paramedic attending to AJ and forces him up to his feet. DREK What do you think you’re doing? The paramedic, clearly intimidated, tries reasoning with the Heavyweight Champion. PARAMEDIC Mr. Stone, this man needs attending to right away. With his preexisting conditions, he could have just broken his back once again. He needs medical attention and quickly. Drek, shaking his head in disbelief, stares down the paramedic. DREK He didn’t say the words yet. “BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” DREK Boo me all you want, but this son of a bitch didn’t say the words yet! And he isn’t getting ANY MEDICAL TREATMENT UNTIL HE DOES SO! PARAMEDIC Mr. Stone, he really needs…. DREK NOT UNTIL HE SAYS THOSE WORDS!!! With his hand still on the collar of the paramedic, Drek then grabs him and tosses him over the top rope. The fans gasp accordingly as Drek yanks up another EMT official and spikes him into the mat with the STONECUTTER! COLE NO! NO! WHAT IS HE DOING?! CABOOSE Drek….what the hell?! COACH He’s a madman! Plain and simple! Once Drek brings that paramedic down with the StoneCutter, all the other officials scatter out of the ring before they get beat as well. Meanwhile, AJ is beginning to twitch among the wreckage of the steel chair. With a sadistic smile, Drek Stone grabs the legs of AJ Flaire and turns him over into a Boston Crab. COLE He couldn’t be…..how could he POSSIBLY keep going with this match? AJ immediately starts howling once turned over, but Drek isn’t done yet. Placing one knee on the spine of AJ, Drek then rocks back on the hold, bending the spine of his opponent at an almost improbable angle. COACH AJ FLAIRE NEEDS SOME HELP NOW! AJ starts screaming for dear life as Drek wrenches back on the hold, but no one can run in to help him. The Heavyweight Champion starts pulling back on the submission even more, driving his knee even further into the spine of AJ Flaire. With a desperate cry in his screams, AJ tries anything to get out of this submission, but it is utterly inescapable. With wide-eyed determination, Drek continues to pull back on the hold, relishing in hearing the yells from the Phenomenal One. COLE JUST SAY IT, AJ! JUST SAY IT! With AJ’s back continuing to bend at an impossible angle, he really has no other alternative. DREK SAY IT, AJ!! SAY IT!! Through clenched teeth, AJ Flaire starts to speak. AJ I……… But Drek interrupts him, obviously cherishing this predicament. DREK SAY IT!!! SAY IT NOW!!! AJ ARGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! With his screams echoing through the frigid air of Toronto, AJ finally has no choice. AJ ….I QUIT!! I QUIT!!! *DING! DING! DING!* Immediately after hearing AJ Flaire say those two magic words, Drek Stone releases the hold and falls to his knees in celebration. COLE I can’t believe him! He’s…..he’s a monster! CABOOSE He earned it tonight, Cole! He earned every aspect of this victory tonight! The referee, looking quite annoyed with Drek Stone at the present moment, hands him his Heavyweight Championship. Drek eagerly snatches the title away and holds it up to the crowd, who reign down upon him with an EXTREME amount of boos. CABOOSE What the hell? Why is everyone so angry with Drek Stone?! COACH Look what he did tonight! He might have fully ended AJ Flaire’s career for good! CABOOSE AJ Flaire shouldn’t even have been in the ring tonight! He shouldn’t have…. COLE THAT SUBMISSION AT THE END WAS UNCALLED FOR! THE MATCH WAS GOING TO BE OVER ALREADY! HOW COULD YOU EVEN DEFEND HIM?! CABOOSE YOU DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO! Drek WARNED AJ of what might happen if he continued with this! You want to blame anyone?! Blame AJ Flaire! The paramedics immediately run past Drek Stone and go to help out AJ Flaire. Three ring agents quickly move up to Drek Stone and demand he leave the ring immediately. Instead of moving right away, Drek looks at AJ Flaire’s prone body with a blank look on his face. Then, surprisingly enough, he actually does the peaceful thing and walks out of the ring. COACH That was the one decent thing he did tonight! The only decent thing! Holding the Heavyweight Belt over his right shoulder, Drek starts backing up the ramp, keeping his eyes locked on the action in the ring. Ring officials and EMTs continue to run past him and slide into the ring, trying to help AJ as quickly as possible. Once Drek gets to the top of the ramp, he stares out at the crowd who are still violently booing him. CABOOSE Say what you want. Drek Stone is STILL the Heavyweight Champion! He made AJ Flaire scream “I Quit”! Something nobody here expected him to do! He managed to hold onto his belt! And, in the process, looks a HELL of a lot tougher to boot! COLE Some things are more important than a wrestling match, Caboose. Some lines you just don’t cross. And let me tell you, Drek Stone crossed one of those lines tonight. Drek finally raises the title belt up for the audience, who continue to jeer him unmercifully. He points at himself excitedly, then walks through the curtains and to the back. We slowly fade away into an advertisement as the officials continue to check on AJ’s condition and start to load him onto a stretcher. Fade to Black Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KingPK 0 Report post Posted January 20, 2006 (edited) CREDITS: Alfdogg Stephen Joseph Zack Malibu LaParkaYourCar Ed Wood Caulfield Patty O'Green Tony149 and King Cucaracha~! © 2006 OAOAST Entertainment. All Rights Reserved. Edited January 20, 2006 by King Cucaracha Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
