AP: COD/BRUISERS TAG TITLE MATCH

[Patty O'Green 0]

Tony, tone, tone. whereever you it'll be about an hour before I answer your PM, I gotta my research bangin for it.

 

The cameras pan down from a shot of the excited Providence natives to show Michael Buffer waiting in the ring. The legendary announcer smiles to himself, as the buzz of anticipation builds around him. He raises the microphone to his lips, preparing to begin his latest introduction.

BUFFER
The following Anglepalooza contest is scheduled for one fall, with a time limit of forty minutes, and it is for the OAOAST World tag team championship! (Providence goes wild at the announcement) The official for tonight's contest is Charles Robinson.

The affable referee smiles into the camera, enjoying his fifteen seconds of fame. But the majority of the focus sits on the darkened entry way as the working class guitars of [i]Frankenstein[/i] bang through the PA system. Crooked maroon letters that read “Sooner Bruisers” flash onto the Angletron, followed up by sights of the men by that name decimating their numerous victims. An explosion of jeers is heard from the rafters, signaling the arrival of the bestial challengers. The two men stride out from the back, cracking their necks from side to side, and bouncing up and down, as they try to loosen themselves up for the biggest match of their long wrestling careers.

BUFFER
Introducing first, the challengers. From Oklahoma, weighing in at a combined weight of five hundred and thirty five pounds, they are former OAOAST tag team champions, and NCAA all Americans, combined between them they have won six NCAA wrestling championships, two world championships, eight high school championships, and seven USA wrestling championships, they are The Pyscho Gremlin, Uber Bruiser, The Man of Tomorrow Uber Bruiser.....THE SOOOONER BRUISEEEEERSSS!

Frank rips off his brand new Anglemania T-shirt and chucks it into the audience, before diving into the ring and ascending to the nearest turnbuckle, where he flexes his stunning muscles, and scowls at the booing New Englanders. Uber patrols the outside, growling at those young fans, who are easily intimidated by his tough guy routine.

COLE
The Sooner Bruisers first appeared in the OAOAST on August Eighth of 2004 as a lovable, but ultimately harmless duo, who wanted nothing more then to win the tag team championship. Since then they've degenerated into deranged, vulgar, psychopaths, but the mission has remained constant. Win those tag team titles. They have one title reign on their trophy case, now they have a chance to add a second. But they have to do it against a team that is like no other they've ever faced before. I'd the closet team to Chicks Over Dicks, they've ever wrestled is the Sk8r Boiz, and the Boiz aren't exactly known as the most consistent tag team on earth. 

A [color=#FF0000][b]red[/color][/b] pyro waterfall illuminates the entrance stage, and all eyes lock onto the currently vacant entranceway. The sonic drum beats of Sugarcult's [i]Los Angeles[/i] rip to life while the red waterfall is courted by a beautiful [color=#FF3399][b]pink[/color][/b]  pyro fountain. Standing next to the gorgeous display of pyrotechnics are miniature Angletrons, showcasing COD's entrance video, a highlight reel filled with clips of their breathtaking moves, interspersed with fly through images of the City of Angels, and shots of the champions in various seductive poses.

COACH
I hate this next part! Cover your ears, Cole. Cover them shits!

[b]BOOOOOM!!![/b]

A violent explosion of [color=#FFFF33][b]gold[/color][/b] pyro destroys the once docile pyrotechnics showing, and causes the capacity crowd to put forth a gargantuan cheer. As the smoke clears, Krista Isadora Duncan emerges through the hazy remnants of the fireworks. She sports a stomach exposing red Obey™ tank top that reads "Make Art. Not War" and a black open sided mini skirt that reveals her entire left leg, a show of skin that's always a crowd favourite! Her baby blue eyes cut a hole through her ring based rivals, while she strikes an alluring pose for the screaming audience.

BUFFER
And the cham......(a huge cheer rises from the stands, drowning out the announcer)....And the champions, first, from Los Angeles, California, she is the CEO of Mrs.Spezia's sweeties, the Hollywood Bad Girl, ALIX MARIA SPEZIA! And her partner, from Los Angeles, California, she is a best selling author, a fitness queen, and star of the world famous FIT with KID line of exercise videos, she is Miss California Krista Isaodra Duncan! Together they are the OAOAST world tag team champions, America's Sweethearts, Chicks Over Dicks! 

Amidst the resonating cries Alix Maria Spezia skips out through the entrance way in a white tie-up front tube top that's cropped all the way to the chest and white booty shorts. Although her fur wristbands, scarf, and leg warmers are fake, the excitement of the fans is very real as they watch her
settles down long enough to join hands with Krista. Krista twirls Alix around, then pulls her into her arms. Alix turns over her shoulder and blows a cute kiss to the camera, leading super imposed red lips to pop on the screen. 

COACH
Hot damn! Those chicks are as hot as a whore house on nickel night!

COLE
Nickel night? I'd hate to see what kind of whores you can get for a nickel. My guess is that many of them probably have a branch on the Coachman family tree! :lol: Anyway, fans, or fans with money, please don't forgot to log on to OAOAST.com or Ebay.com and bid for your chance to spend a day with Chicks Over Dicks. All proceeds go to the Tibetan Freedom Organization!

Ally skips down the ramp, passing out her world famous Miss Spezia's Sweeties' brand gingerbread cookies to the appreciative crowd members. Krista is far more focused on the beasts in the ring, never once letting her hateful glare leave their bodies. She takes position at the center of the ring apron, where she offers her rivals several vulgarity filled choice words. Alix slides into the ring, making herself the “starter” for her team. Frank rushes Uber out of the ring, and with our two competitors chosen, Robinson calls for the bell.

DING DING DING DONG

Alix (foolishly?) accepts Frank's offer for a collar an elbow tie up. The size difference between the two warriors is comical, and Frank plays this up by feigning a mammoth struggle with The Hollywood Bad Girl. Once he grows tired of toying with her, he drops to his side and flings her over with an arm drag. The tug on her limb was strong, and she shoots him an annoyed glare while nursing her sore arm. Frank responds to her complaint by flexing his gargantuan muscles, and informing her that this what she'll be dealing with all night. Not exactly intimidated by his cautionary tale, she stands up to meet him in the center of the ring for another lockup. This time Frank wastes little time with shenanigans, and spins behind her to coil his arms around her skinny waist. He then takes the lightweight off her feet and roughly deposits her onto the mat with an elementary amateur wrestling slam. As she lies face first on the grey canvas, the big man drops to her level, then performs a grounded switch, so that he lies stomach first along her much smaller body. Then he allows her to rise to all fours, only to straddle her like they were about to play a game of horsey. For Alix a simple round of horsey would be much more preferable to the perverse act that Frank actually performs; wildly smacking his palm against her sumptuous BUTT! 

COACH
Oh, boy, that's worth the forty dollar pay per view price tag alone!

COLE
Why must you think with your penis?

COACH
Because it's the smartest thing to come out your mouth all day.

Obviously enraged by the spanking, the slippery gal quickly backs through Frank's legs and storms to a vacant corner. While the crowd boos her adversary, she fastens an expression of a sheer hatred upon him. Frank ignores their combined anger, and instead turns to Krista, telling her that anytime she wants some of that hot action all she has to do is ask. Krissy's response is to give Frank the finger, which merely draws a smile from The Man of Tomorrow. He refocuses his attention on Alix, and leans into her for another lockup. However he feints on the move, and ducks low to grab hold of Alix's bare legs. He lifts her onto his shoulders, while allowing a devious chuckle to escape his mouth. But his actions are anything but chuckle worthy, brutally slamming Alix to the mat with careless disregard for her physical health. She lands with a violent impact in her corner, and gasps of agony immediately hiss out of her bright red lips.

COACH
I don't even think that move has a name, it's just picking someone up and tossing them aside like they weren't nothing.

Bored with tossing Alix around like a ragdoll, The Man of Tomorrow points a meaty finger at Krista and demands she enter the ring so that he can have some “real competition.” Uber seconds Frank's plea, even going so far as to deem Alix “useless” and a waste of their “good time”. Though Krista would heartily disagree with that assessment, she looks on with a mixture of confusion and anger. Part of her wishes to give Al the chance to prove them wrong, but another part of her wants these loathsome animals all to herself. However her wishes are a moot point, as Ally isn't willing to leave the match anytime soon. She confidently strolls towards the Oklahoman bully and engages him in another lockup. Again Frank spins behind her for a quick waistlock. Alix instantly and unsuccessfully tries to free herself from his clutches. The futile nature of her effort brings a smile to his face. For a moment Alix gives up on her attempt, and her body sags in weakened depression. Pleased that he's squashed her fighting spirit, Frank prepares to hit her with a german suplex. But before he can even get her an inch off the ground, Alix drives the heel of her shoe into his size 14 boot! The pain of the sneaky move causes the Bruiser to release the hold, and hop around the squared circle in misery.  Both audience and foe mock his misfortune, the crowd by cheering his woe and Alix by mimicking his wild hoping. Her taunting angers Frank enough to push aside the pain and charge her with a shoulder block. But she counters the attack with a drop toe hold! However, The Man of Tomorrow rises as quickly as he fell, and proceeds to dart towards her with another shoulder block. This time Alix ends all his forward momentum by slamming her fur covered boots into his kneecaps! The strike sinks a moaning Frank to his knees, and gives Alix all the time she needs to leap onto the second rope, springboard off and lance her leg into his thick neck!

COLE
Alix is bringing Frank down to her size!

Cole may have spoke to soon, as Frank rises to his full vertical base. However he spends his time upright in a most ridiculous fashion, hobbling to and fro like an inebriated cripple. The brunette babe takes advantage of his wounded state by latching onto his arm and thrusting him towards the corner. But Frank reverses Alix midway through the move and forces a torturous back first meeting with the ringposts upon her. The Okie charges her, employing a body splash in his effort to splatter her across the venue. But Ally avoids the move by sticking her feet into the air, and letting Frank get up close and personal with her furry footwear!

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” scream the audience.

While poor Frank tries to remove the gob of faux fur from his mouth, Alix uses his moment's distraction to ascend to the top turnbuckle. The sold out audience belts out a deep throated roar of anticipation, as her brown eyes narrow in on her target. The cute Californian flashes a peace sign to her adoring fans then springs off the ropes. She wraps her athletic legs around his thick neck then pulls forward, using the velocity of the move to turn Frank head over heels! The onlookers bellow with delight when they watch Frank get flung across the ring into a vacant corner. In spite of the nauseating nature of the hold, Frank quickly rises to his feet and makes another blind charge to Alix. Once again Ally Cat is ready for him and greets his arrival with a drop toe hold! Unable to mount a suitable defense for the move, Frank lands with a disgusting face first thud onto the canvas. Krista and the audience applaud Alix's exhibition of skill, but Uber nervously paces along the apron, afraid his over confident brother may not be able to handle Alix's quickness. But Ally's speed becomes the least of Frank's worries when The Hollywood Bad Girl decides to serve him a taste of his own perverted medicine. She takes seat on his muscular back, and after a sly nod to the buzzing crowd, proceeds to ram her hand into his fleshy BUTT! As her hands bounce across the horrified warrior's backside, she indulges her inner gangsta by singing [i]Disco Inferno[/i] by 50 Cent. “Little mama show me how you move it, go ahead and put ya back into it. Do ya thang like it ain't nothing to it. Sh-sh-sh-shake that ass girl!” The spectators are throughly amused at Miss Spezia's mistreatment of her challenger. Uber, on the other hand, is all like “WTF DOOD? U SUK FGT!” or some such nonsense.

COACH
So if I shell out fourteen grand to the Tibetan whatever organization for that auction, that's the kind of hot action I can look forward to?

While many men, and more then a few women, would kill their own mother to be in Frank's position, the Man of Tomorrow isn't so thrilled to be in this predicament. In an effort to end this embarrassing charade, he uses his herculean strength to stand up and hurl Alix off his back. Ally quickly composes herself, and thankfully so, because Frank is barreling down on her with an axe handle smash! Fortunately, she dives underneath the ropes before he can lay a hand on her. He leans over the cables and spews vulgar orders for her to return to the squared circle. Alix is more then happy to [i]not[/i] oblige his request and instead further enrages Frank by leaping onto the announce table and doing the RUNNING MAN. This latest show of disrespect dunks Frank into new depths of rage, and he takes his anger out on poor Charlie Robinson's shirt collar.

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” chant the audience.

Alix renters the battlefield on her volition, but refuses to cease her taunting of Big Frank. While Robinson desperately tries to bring The Man of Tomorrow under control, Ally imitates his bodybuilding-esque poses, by doing her own set of poses complete with a face that's best compared to one you might make if you have explosive diarrhea.

COLE
Big Frank has been totally thrown off his game.

Alix applies the tag to gal-pal Krista Isaodra Duncan, denying Frank a chance for desperately sought after vengeance. Krista's arrival is greeted with a resonating ovation, and chants of “K-I-D!” spring forth from every corner of the venue. Back in the center of the ring, Robinson is having a devil of a time calming down The Man of Tomorrow. It would seem the burly strong man isn't able to put Alix's boorish abusage of him aside, and once again demands that she return to face him. Unfortunately for him, his wish will not be Krista's demand, and Miss California swings behind him to grab a waistlock. She then drops to her knees, and hauls The Man of Tomorrow to the canvas with double leg take down. However Frank is able to use his superior amateur technique to thwart her takedown and roll behind her to grab a seated hammerlock. The moment the move is applied, the fitness queen feels a sharp pressure build within her limbs. This burning pain immediately forces her to make moves to escape the hold. She rises to her feet, thinking that she'll be able use her free arm to elbow her way out of the hold. Yet this plan is snuffed out the second Frank transitions to a side headlock. He tightly wrenches the hold, torquing her neck and making every effort to rip her head clear off her body. The bitter agony of Frank's death grip becomes too much for Krista to bear, and she begins to dig her nails into his eyes in a sick attempt to free herself from his clutches. Frank wiggles his body back and forth, trying his hardest to avoid her berserk efforts to claw his eyes out. However his quick body movements take him into the ropes, where Krista hooks her ankle around the bottom cable. Using the rope as a stabilizing base, she puts her hand onto his expansile midsection and heaves him towards the opposite end of the ring. She pursues his path, ready to overtake him with a leg lariat. But before she can get off the ground, a rebounding Frank pushes her to the mat with a shoulder block. She rolls onto her six packed stomach, praying that Frank will hop over her and continue his running of the ropes. He takes her bait and leaps over her body on his trip to cables, and comes back with the lethal Soonerline. But the blond bombshell is adequately prepared for the move, and grabs onto his attacking him to flip him over with an arm drag!

“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” sing the fans.

Face aflame with anger, Frank rises, looking to decimate the recipient of the audience's love. But no such action will come to pass, because Krista overtakes him with another crowd popping arm drag! Again Frank stands just as quickly as he fell. But he's given no opportunity to mount an attack as Krissy knocks him over with a fabulous flipping dropkick!

Krista plays to her legions of adoring fans, and to her own by beauty, by fluffing her gorgeous blond tresses. The simple motion sends the crowd into a state of absolute rapture, but leaves Frank in a phase of utter anger.

With his blood pressure rising to lethal levels, Frank determines that he can no longer preserve his sanity and combat COD at the same time. Thus he applies the tag to his younger sibling, Uber Bruiser. The Pyscho Gremlin arrives into the squared circle amidst a chorus of jeers and taunts. But he pays them no mind, instead focusing his attention exclusively upon Krista. He orders her to engage in a lock up, and she happily grants the request, locking horns with Uber in the center of the ring. Uber uses his brute strength to raise Krista's left arm above her head, allowing him to slip behind her and hook in a waistlock. Problematically, he's never given a chance to do much more then that, as Krista grabs onto his right arm, then dives to the mat, pulling Uber down with her. The Pyscho Gremlin moves quickly, scissoring his tree trunk sized legs around her neck, briefly regaining control of the bout. But his grip on Miss California isn't nearly as tight as he would've hoped, and she succeeds in kipping up to freedom. She patiently waits for her frustrated foe to rise, then attempts to a deliver a knee into his midsection. However he counters the strike, by stepping to his side and snaring her into a side headlock. Again his grip is dangerously weak, and the Los Angeles native has little difficulty in breaking it by turning the hold into a standing key lock. The now desperate Bruiser calls upon his most basic of amateur training to turn the tables on his pesky rival. He drops backwards pulling over with a modified arm drag. Working with great speed he tries to hold Krista down with a top wristlock. But that holds last for nary a second, before Krista spins to her knees and reverses it into an armlock.

COACH
I gotta say Krista's holding her own when it comes to mat wrestling with Uber. Looks to me like he underestimated her, but I don't see this pattern repeating itself throughout the match.

Krista's hold wasn't designed to do much besides put in an end to the flurry of amateur based counter the two were engaging in. But that simple fact doesn't stop the fitness queen from gleefully ripping and wrenching Uber's limb, causing irritated grunts to leave the lips of the former tag team champion. Twenty painful seconds into the move, Uber begins to feel as if the woman is planning on separating his shoulder from it's socket. This obviously being something he doesn't want to have happen, Bruiser utilizes his leg strength to push himself to his feet. Krista has no choice but to follow him up, lest she'd run the risk of losing control over her foe. Uber takes his free hand and presses it against her attacking arm, hoping that it will prevent her from applying additional pressure. In actuality, the technique manages to loosen her grip just enough to allow him to maneuver her towards a neutral corner. She's unable to stop Bruiser's counter and thus finds her tan figure wedged against turnbuckles. The dutiful official steps in and requires her to release Uber, a request she quickly grants. Yet this leaves her open to a cheap shot in the form of a knee to the stomach from her retribution seeking rival.

“BOOOO!” goes the crowd, prompting Uber to howl towards them in response.

Her ribs burning almost as hot as the hatred she holds for her rivals, Krista begins to slowly crumple to the mat. But Uber shoots her upwards with a flesh searing knife edge chop. As she whimpers in misery, he snakes his fingers through her vibrant hair and drags her towards the middle of the ring. His tattooed arms coil around her neck, trapping her within another side headlock. Desperate to rid herself off the man's treacherous tentacles, Krista hooks onto his spandex tights, hoping against hope that she'll be able lift him into a backsuplex. However her ludicrous desire goes unanswered, and Uber drags her to his domain with a headlock takedown. With the headlock still applied, he drives his left shoulder into her deltoids, pushing her shoulders into the mat for a pinning predicament. Robinson makes the count.

ONE


TWO

Krista gets her shoulders off the mat well before the three count.

COLE
I may not like the guy but I'll give credit to Uber for getting Krista into a pinning situation while still doing damage to her neck.

Stricken with a burning desire to escape Uber's dungeon, Krissy delves into her bag of tricks in order to mount an escape attempt. She slashes her nails across his face liked a crazed feline, making a grand effort to slice out her foe's frosty eyes. When that approach meets with failure, Miss California turns towards slamming her fist into his ear, praying that the sudden jolt and devilish headache will win her freedom. Unfortunately The Pyscho Gremlin proves to be impervious to these underhanded tactics, and the hold remains stable. Eventually he hauls Krista upright, where he begins to drag her towards his corner. But the sudden movement causes his grip to adjust ever so slightly. This minuscule change in pressure is all KID needs to shove him into the ring ropes. However her offensive salvo has a depressingly short shelf life, and the Okie is able to steamroll her with a shoulder tackle. Acting on instinct alone, she rolls onto her stomach, where Uber hops over her and journeys to the ropes. He returns to her her, thinking he'll be able to squash her with a body splash. Imagine his surprise when his pug ugly face is introduced to the underside of her Adidas snow boots by a kip up dropkick! The Bruiser plummets to the canvas, as the audience comes alive with cheers for their heroine.

COLE
Krista just taking Uber off his feet with a dropkick. And those aren't exactly the cheapest shoes you can use in a wrestling match.

While Cole educates the viewers on the intricacies of women's snow boots, Krista grabs Uber by his mullet and pulls the groggy brawler to his feet. She entraps him into a half nelson, then shoots her body forward. The momentum of the move causes Uber to follow her downwards, and his face endures a viscous meeting with solid as steel canvas. Krista offers him no time to lick his wounds, as she hooks his leg for the pinfall.

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

The Psycho Gremlin shoots his shoulder off the mat, drawing several boos from the audience. He rises under his own accord, only to be instantly pounced on by the champion. She underhooks his right arm, then drops her knees to the canvas causing his square jaw to be  violently driven into her shoulder. Blood forming at the tip of his mouth, he wobbles from side to side, left dizzied by her attack. Krista capitalizes on his brief disorientation by clamping onto his tights and pulling him down for a small package.

ONE

An effortless kickout by Uber follows the one count. Despite the ease of the pin escape, he's unable to regain control of the contest, and his enemy punishes him with grounded knee strikes to the chest. After she finishes devouring his pectorals with her kneecaps she drags the amateur wrestler to his feet. From there she entangles him within an inverted headlock. He shoots knees towards her pretty face in an attempt to escape the hold, but his stubby legs fail to reach the champion. As such she's easily able to spin to his side, slice her arm through his neck, and push him down to the canvas with a variated DDT! While Uber lays a battered wreck on the floor, the onlookers loudly ovate Krista's flashy move. Once again she attempts a lateral press...

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

Uber pushes himself out of the pinning situation!

COACH
It's gonna take a little more then an inverted snap ddt to pin a collegiate all American.

A look of frustration over the pinfall escapes takes shape on Krista's face as she watches her vexing foe writhe along the canvas. The snarling diva directs her anger onto Uber, throwing stomps towards the neck her DDY just violated. Eventually Uber is able to rise to his feet past the wave of hate filled kicks. Yet this proves to be a terrible course of action, as one spinning back kick from Krista forces him into a neutral corner. She stalks his position, but by the time she reaches The Pyscho Gremlin, he's recovered enough of his strength to paste her with a knife edge chop. The fearsome blow rocks Krista to her very core, but she summons enough gusto to return fire with her own chop. Unphased by a back hand slap from a 150 pound woman, Bruiser blasts her with a duo of overhand chops that tear away at the fabric of her shirt, and push her back towards the center of the ring. He then exits the corner, and takes firm hold of her hair. He violently jerks her head downward, while at the same time driving his other arm upward, catching her chin with a rising elbow. The pain doesn't even get the time to settle in Krista's body, before The Pyscho Gremlin is attempting to whip her to ropes. It's an attempt that fails, however, and KID painstakingly reverses the hold. Uber hits the ropes, returning to bulldoze Krista with an elbow strike. But the blond bombshell counters this tactic, by hitting the mat and grounding him with a drop toe hold. The Okie was able to get his hands up to protect his face from the harsh mats, but [i]that[/i] defense does nothing to protect him from getting Oklahoma Rolled by Krista!

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

Despite the nausea Krista's series of moves induced, Uber is able to move his shoulder off the mat.

COLE
What irony that would've been, a Sooner Bruiser getting beat by a move called the Oklahoma Roll.

The latest kickout only managed to escalate Krista's already towering level of frustration. Once more Uber becomes the target for her ire, getting hauled to his feet, and led to a vacant corner. Growling with primal rage, Krista plunges his bearded face into the turnbuckle, delighting when she hears a distinct groan of agony bubble in his throat. Her barbaric pleasure is momentarily ended when Uber shoots an elbow into her well developed stomach. But thanks to the “abs of steel” nature of her midsection Krista is able to shrug aside the pain, and launch Uber towards his corner. But he reverses the move and sends Krista running towards the turnbuckles. This innocent reversal turns deadly the second Big Frank's knee is driven into Krista's back! She instantly sinks to her own knees, howling in marked pain that just adds to the audiences hatred for the Bruiser brothers. Ally and the crowd urge Robinson to lay down the law. But Charlie, who's scared shitless of Frank, isn't overly willing to incur any more of The Man of Tomorrow's wrath.

COACH
Out of the ring these cats may be way out of control, but within it they are a cohesive well oiled wrestling machine.

COLE
Of course they are Coach, they've beaten Black T, The Heavenly Rockers, South Central Militia, and like I said they haven't actually lost a match in a year. I hate to say it, but you can argue that they are the best active tag team in the OAOAST.

Uber hurls a dazed Krista into the black ring cables. Thankful her cloud of grogginess disappears just in time to avoid his standing lariat! Her feet move her towards Frank, who's eagerly awaiting a chance to impale her with a shoulder block. But his dream remains just that, as Krista blasts him off the apron with a running knee strike! Teeth, sweat, babyoil, and blood filled spit join Frank in a tumultuous crash to the ringside mat, as the audience shake the rafters with a mighty roar

“K-I-D! K-I-D! K-I-D!”

Spurred on by a rush of adrenaline, Krista directs a running elbow smash towards Uber. But he avoids the strike by lowering his body and locking her down with a waistlock. His body movements say German Suplex but his adversary says otherwise, shooting a round of elbows into his noggin. The unanswered series of blows cause his grip to weaken, and allow KID to execute a standing switch. Unlike he, she has no disillusions of hitting a German Suplex, and instead goes for a simple but effective school boy. C-Rob counts the pin...

CROWD
ONE


CROWD
TWO

Uber makes another last minute escape, by reaching up and shoving her into his vacant corner. But  the area doesn't stay vacated for long, as Frank, like a monster rising from a swampy morass, returns to the apron to latch onto Krista's head and drive her throat first into the cables. She recoils off the ropes, pawing at her wounded neck, making a useless effort to stop her last bit of breath from abandoning her.  Krista's troubles only increase when Uber nearly decapitates her with the lethal [b]Soonerline[/b]. She folds to the mat in a whimpering heap, unable to discern what's worse, the suffocating pain in her neck, or the feeling that her chest just got torn through with a buzz saw. The Pyscho Gremlin adds another choice to her option of maladies, by dropping his elbow squarely onto the top of her forehead.

COLE
Just like you said, Coach, these men operate like machines. They've been involved in wrestling competitions since they were five years old, they know the ring, the mat, inside and out, and that's what makes them nearly unbeatable.

Uber takes Kris by the arm and pulls her upright. Still holding her limb, he drags her towards him, then leans forward to punish her with a lariat, the forward motion of the devastating hold making it even more horrific to endure. She sags to the canvas, clutching her badly injured chest, and desperately seeking some sort of aid. But jailed within the Bruisers' dungeon, the most she, or any one else, can do is watch helplessly as Uber applies the tag to his older sibling.

A front row fan, sitting with his ten year old daughter, offers Krista a suggestion on how to battle The Man Of Tomorrow “Hey, Krista, if you wanna scare Frank, tell him you're gonna make him take a piss test!”

“ONLY IF I CAN USE YOUR DAUGHTER'S MOUTH AS MY CUP!” Frank retorts, causing the enraged spectator to attempt to hop the guardrail and fight Big Frank.

COLE
Uncalled for!

While security tries to subdue the livid fan, Frank rifles stomps into Krista's chest. She's so wounded by Uber's prolonged assault that she can't even think to protect herself against the barrage. After the tenth kick, Frank abruptly calls his stomping to a close. Krista has little reason to be thankful for this action due to the fact that Frank then presses his maroon boots onto the bottom rope, driving the coarse cable into her sore neck. The ropes strangle Krissy, and muffle her screams into weakened sighs of desperation. These cries are barely heard over Frank's own bloodthirsty shouts of triumph. Meanwhile, Charles Robinson gives Frank to the count of five to release his tortured prisoner.

“ONE! TWO! Come on, Mister Bruiser! THREE! FOUR! FI...”

Big Frank ceases his death choke of Krista before Robinson is presented the opportunity to disqualify him. The official weakly warns him about his suspect tactics, but one “Shut the fuck up” later turns the spineless zebra into a mute. Frank moves his attention back to his rival, and stands her up, readying a punch that's certain to be a knock out blow. However evades the potential death strike by wildly slamming her shoulder into his gut. Frank doubles over in a mixture of minor discomfort and sudden shock, allowing Miss California to pepper him with kicks. When she feels that he's been properly weakened by her strikes, she makes an effort to toss him into the ropes. He's not quite as weakened as she believed, though, and she's exposed to this annoying fact when he reverses the hold. Her feet carry her to the ropes, then sprint her back into waiting knee to the gut from her advesary.

COACH
Let me tell you another reason why the Sooner Bruisers are going to win this match. Because they were conceived, born, raised, and will do in the gym. These guys were bred to do nothing but be athletes. This is their entire life, they have no other reason to exist otherwise.

COLE
I'm sure they thank you for that lovely backhanded compliment.

With Krista a quivering mess of flesh and bones, her attacker stands upon her legs and awkwardly bends them backwards. He then sits back, raising her into the air and taking firm hold of her unmoving arms. She's lift staring into the bright arena lights, her limbs being painfully contorted by this blue collar psychopath.

COACH
That hold is commonly referred to as the bow and arrow lock.

Alix is left aghast by Krista's predicament and immediately does everything within in her power to rally her partner to battle against the treacherous villain. She frantically beats her hands against the top rope, and pleads with the crowd to get behind her cause. The Rhode Islanders quickly and boisterously throw themselves into the task of motivating Krista towards freedom.

“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!”

COLE
The fans are getting behind Krista like always, but it's more of a matter of Krista getting out of this bow and arrow lock.

Krista doesn't have to map out an escape route, because Frank shockingly lets her go free. This is no merciful respite, however, and The Man of Tomorrow moves her into an equally deadly rear chinlock with a body scissors. He makes certain to position Krista so that she faces her worried partner, then cruelly informs the both of them that once she chokes Krista out, he and his brother will have their way with Alix.

COLE
Frank's playing mind games right now, but not only is he doing that she's sucking the wind and the breath right out of Krista.

Drawing strength from Alix's and the crowd's support, as well as motivation from Big Frank's vulgar taunts, Krista shifts her body to the left and manages to head upright. But Frank tracks her movement with expert precision and clamps down on her with a front facelock. As Alix shouts out even more cheers of encouragement, Kris takes up the monumental task of raging against his hold, tugging at his iron like arms to wade off the mounting tension. But she can't peel them away long enough to break free or even breathe comfortably for that matter. He then makes her all her rebellious efforts for naught, using a DDT to blast her to mat with carefully calculated force. Krista lets out a resonant cry that seems capable of leveling the ring with it's volume.

COLE
Not a whole lot of flashy offense from The Bruisers that many of our fans like to see. But the attacks that these guys use have one very important property: they hurt like heck!

COACH
I'm glad to see that you're finally showing these cats some mad respect.

COLE
I never said anything about not respecting their athletic technique. It's their behavior outside the ring that leaves much to be desired.

Fairly pleased with the damage he's caused, Frank tags his brother into the fray. Uber hits the ring and instantly tries to take advantage of his bro's hardwork by attempting a pin.

ONE


TWO

The SoCal Beauty defiantly kicks out, leaving annoyed Uber to direct a menacing stare Robinson's way. While the ref shyly holds up two fingers, Krista expends a great deal of energy by standing up on her own power. Bruiser instantly pounces on her, sucking her into the oft-used front facelock. Feeling the pooling warmth of pain around her neck, Krissy wildly fights back, and somehow succeeds slipping her head out of his arm and scoring an Irish Whip But the amateur wrestling legend saw the move coming and reverses the attack, bouncing her off the ropes. As she returns to the center of the ring Uber throws up his leg for a big boot, but she evades the move by rolling underneath it and continuing her run of the ropes. After she returns from the opposite cables, Bruiser hits his deadly mark with a knee to her six packed stomach. Krista is reduced into a wheezing, coughing, mess and is totally incapable of preventing The Pyscho Gremlin from shoving her into the ropes and hitting her with another kneestrike. Wailing in defiance, she stays on her feet, refusing to accept defeat at the hands of her relentless opponents. But Krista's defiance just gives Uber further license to pulverize her, and he belts her with three more knee strikes. 

“LET'S GO KRISTA! LET'S GO KRISTA!” bleat the crowd, led on by Jade and Alix. 

COACH
These dudes is cutting the ring off and stomping the life out of Krista. I can think of better ways to double team a woman who looks like that, but I ain't gonna be the one to tell 'em how to do their jobs!

Uber buries the under sole of his boot deep into Krista's back, causing the fitness queen to spasm in pain. Three more brutal stomps follow, each being accompanied by the same disheartening convulsions. Upon completing the stomping, he drags her to her feet, where he fastens her into a waistlock. The Pyscho Gremlin raises her into the air, then dives backwards, executing a mammoth suplex! While the fans react with cringes and cries, the extraordinary force of the move carries Krista upright and directs her staggering body towards The Bruisers corner. Always looking for an excuse to inflict as much pain as possible on Krista, Big Frank leans over the ropes and rudely slugs her in the back of the head with a forearm, knocking her to the mat.

COLE
Robinson, you've got to do something about that! It's your job!

“Owwwwww owwww owww!” Uber howls, standing proudly over the body of his soon to be vanquished enemy.

In a most unusual display of aerial showmanship that Frank is imploring him not to take, Uber ascends to the third rope. The crowd murmurs in anxious anticipation, unsure of the last time they have saw a Bruiser offer a move from the third rope. However they won't witness that rare sight tonight, thanks to Krista gathering enough of her strength to crotch the man on the ringpost! Shaken and miserable, The Pyscho Gremlin teeters back and forth on the ropes, clenching his little warriors and making sure her cruel move hasn't shattered his prized possessions. Perhaps sniffing blood in the air, and sensing a chance to avenge the past ten minutes of utter hell, Krista scorches towards Uber like a blond bat out of hell and joins him atop the turnbuckle. She leaps into the sky, and ties her toned legs around his neck. Their glorious strength then rips him off the turnbuckle with an audience pleasing hurricanrana! Both competitors gracefully travel through the air, before encountering a far less graceful collision into the canvas.

COLE
What height on that hurricanrana! I don't think the Bruisers have ever dealt with a team that uses nothing but cruiser weight moves, and whenever Alix and Krista use a speed based attack, The Bruisers are left dumbfounded.

COACH
They've been stomping on Krista for the past thirteen minutes and you wanna give the most prized title in all of tag team wrestling to COD because of one little hurricanrana? You a gender traitor and a fool ass mark.

His immense desire to torture Krista taking a momentary backseat to a primal urge to survive, Uber rolls away, creating some much needed distance between he and the suddenly resurgent champion. Krista seems to be swimming against an agonizing current, the duress she's under making her crawl to her corner an extremely arduous one. Alix, sensing that she's COD best chance to capture the gold, furiously beats on the turnbuckle, trying to mobolize her fallen partner. Soon the entire crowd joins in, stamping their feet in unison, sending encouraging noises to Krista's frayed spirit. Drawing on their heartwarming show of support, Kris, face steeled with gritty determination, digs her nails into the canvas and claws her way to the corner. Suddenly The Pyscho Gremlin stirs, giving rise to concerned gasps from the crowd. Unwilling to afford Krista the chance to make a much needed tag, he locks his hand around her ankle, trying his hardest to freeze her in place. Despite his tight lockdown, Alix's unwavering encouragement sparks Krista to fight past the cutthroat bully. With one titanic lunge, she surges forward make a hot tag to her perky partner! 

[b]“YEAAAAA!”[/b]

The fans are brought to a state of euphoria as The Hollywood Bad Girl renters the bout! She temporarily ignores Uber, and makes a bee line for Big Frank, dropkicking the HGH enhanced monster off the apron! Seeking to defend his brother's honor, as well as curtail COD's new found momentum, Uber rampages towards Alix. But the agile warrior defends against his strike by jumping onto the third rope and flying back at him with a splendid lionsault press! He tries to step out of the way, but frustratingly moves himself into the line of fire for an inverted face lock that Alix easily morphs into an Inverted DDT!

“Owwwww, owwww, owww!” Alix howls, mimicking The Pyscho Gremlin to the Rhode Islanders' unrestrained joy.

Disgusted with Alix's mocking, Uber stands up with the intent on making her pay for her comedic routine with a clubbing forearm. But Ally snuffs out his attacking flame by grabbing onto his descending limb, lacing her leg between his and driving him into the canvas with the [b]True Life:I just got beat up by a girl[/b] (STO)! Now sooner then Uber smacks against the mat does his big brother interject himself into the fracas, bearing down on Ally with a shoulder tackle. But the ferocious tiger is turned into a docile pussycat by Alix who nearly knocks his head off with a standing enziguri. Dazed and mortally wounded by the thunderous kick, Frank rolls his carcass out the ring, leaving his sibling to fend for himself.

COLE
The quickness of COD continues to confound the Bruisers!

With Uber momentarily incapacitated, Alix stands at The Pyscho Gremlin's side and puts her big ol' booty on duty, bouncing her voluptuous backside up and down to the delight of the audience. Those home based viewers who are to proud to jerk off to Girls Gone Wild commercials like the rest of us begin to shake hands with their one eyed milk man at the glorious sight of Alix's thrusting and pumping tush. But she leaves them with a serious a case of blue balls when she cuts short her display and hurls herself at Uber with a standing moonsault. Yet, Uber rolls out of the way the exact second she begins her ascent! He stands up, expecting to see the pleasing image of her remains splattered across the canvas. Picture his shock and horror when her boots impact solidly against his face with a dropsault!

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” bleat the audience.

Similar to his relative, a woozy Uber begins to beat a hasty retreat to the outside. Alix isn't as willing to let him escape as she was his brother, and he only gets as far as the ring apron before her hands snag his mullet and drag him upright. She lays him back first across the second rope, and pelts his chest with overhand chops to further subdue him. Once she's assured that he lacks the strength to escape his awful position, she makes her way up the turnbuckles. The now standing crowd screams with eagerness for what's sure to be a breath taking move. 

ALIX
:headbang:

Miss Spezia certainly doesn't disappoint her legion of adoring fans, launching herself off the top rope with a leg drop. Still stuck on the ropes, Uber finally revives himself from his groggy state. Unfortunately his freshly unblurred vision is engulfed by the entirety of Alix's tan leg descending upon his face. Her limb cuts right through his muscular neck, and the force of her amazing strike flings him off the ropes and into the ring. While he gasps for the air that's all but abandoned him, she covers his body with a lateral press.

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

CROWD
THRE---

Big Frank ends the pinfall by driving an axe handle smash into her back!

“BOOOOOO!”

Franks reappearance in the contest is short lived, however,as the moment he stands up to deliver a beating to Alix, Krista delivers [i]him[/i] to the outside mats by knocking him over the ropes with a high flipping lariat!

COLE
Frank did his part by keeping him team alive, but it looks like it's back down to Alix and Uber.

Upon assuming a standing position, Uber lobs another lariat towards Ally's face. But the speedy lady slips bellow his outstretched arm, and pops up behind him. With fist clenched for a discus punch, he whirls around, thinking he can floor her with one mighty strike. No such action occurs, though, as Alix lights his chest up with a trilogy of knife edge chops. Each strike does a beautiful job of ripping away at the man's pale skin, but his mounting anger allows him to brush the damage aside and land a harsh knee into her stomach. Another knee follows, and Uber assumes very tenuous control on this match. He let's her go free, and she crawls to a neutral corner, nursing her stomach, moaning pain, and wondering how's she going to regain the advantage over this terrible monster. Uber's answer is that she can't, and he lays a thick forearm into her back to hammer that point home. The pain from that single strike is so immense that Alix has to turn to face him, just to protect her now seriously wounded back. Problematically this leaves her open to what ever strike Bruiser's vile mind can concoct. Rather then try anything fancy, he simply whips her towards the ropes. This proves to be an amazingly boneheaded blunder, as upon her return Alix slides into him for a wheel barrel set up. She then elevates her body towards his head, and snares her arm around his neck for a flashy bulldog. But her high risk move never materializes in reality, thanks to The Pyscho Gremlin grabbing hold of her slender waist and slamming her face first into the canvas. Alix's hands immediately go up to attend to the burning pain in her face, but their soft touch is quickly replaced by the rough feel of Uber's skin as he locks her into a crippler crossface! The agony brought on by the hold builds at an alarming rate, and Alix begins weeping with sincerity, unsure of how much of this torturous hold she'll be able to withstand. Stuck in the center of the ring, the ropes appear so distant they might as well be in on an other continent. Thus she sadly raises her hand to submit to the lethal submission hold and award her tag team title to the brothers grim.

But Krista drives her point of her boot into Uber's skull, causing him to involuntarily break the hold! Incensed over Krissy denying his team their second tag team titles, Frank reaches into the ring and drags her to the outside where he plans on mangling her face with an assist from the steel guardrail. But the only one who gets their face mangled in this exchange is Frank, as Krista obliterates his stout nose with an audience popping superkick! Frank hits the mat like a sack of bricks, blood streaming out of his nostrils, tracing along the jagged contours of his puffy cheeks. Being the sweet soul that she is, Krista pulls her compact mirror out of her pocket and holds it up to Frank's face so he can see just how “great” his remodeled nose looks.

“C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!”

Meanwhile, Uber has Miss Spezia prepped for a basic body slam. But the elementary hold turns into a complex mess for the Okie when Alix's baby oil soaked body slips out of his clutches and lands behind him. Before Uber is even made aware of the fact that she's no longer within his grasp, her shoes are dropkicking him towards the ropes. Never the most graceful OAOAST superstar, Uber manages to trip over his own two feet, and deposit his chunky frame onto the second rope. His klutzy loss is actually Alix's gain, because she believes that he's in the perfect position to be [i]eradicated[/i] by one of her famous high risk attacks. Alix charges towards her vulnerable foe and leaps through the second rope, while latching onto the third and second cable to maintain her precious balance. She uses her generated momentum to swing back towards Uber, seeking to strike him with the 619, or 310 in her case. Perhaps a better name in this particular instance would be “failed attempt” because Uber somehow succeeds in catching her twirling body within his arms. While the crowd jeers his otherwise impressive counter, he backs away from the ropes, scanning his brain for a devastating move to unleash on helpless Alix. No one will ever know what his pea sized mind came up with, because Krista dismounts her perch on the top rope and drives a missile dropkick into his forehead! The move “blesses” him with an excruciatingly miserable headache, and more importantly pushes he and Alix into a lateral press. Robinson makes the count!

CROWD
ONE


CROWD
TWO

But Uber kicks out well before the three count is made. Shifting his focus away from the downed competitor, Robinson beseeches Kris to depart the ring so that some semblance of order can be granted to this contest. Needless to say Krista would prefer to continue the repeated double teaming of her hapless rival, and an argument ensues.

COACH
How the hell did Uber kick out after getting kicked right in the dome? It looked like her boot went straight through his cerebellum. But ole boy stay steady kicking out.

While Krista fights a losing verbal battle with Robinson, her partner in state endorsed civil union has taken position on the top turnbuckle. An excited buzz comes from the many fans who expect Alix to enchant them with one of her many dazzling displays of aerial technique. But rather then use a shooting star press, or a 450 splash or even a friggin' fist drop, Alix chooses to remain on her pulpit and offer a [b]eulogy[/b] to Julius Cesar.

“Friends, Romans, Countrymen, lend me your ears! I come to bury Julius Cesar, not to praise him!” she bellows, confusing the hell out of the crowd, many of whom read on the same level as that of a dead skunk.

Her audition for the role of Mark Anthony is cut short by the troubling sight of Big Frank Bruiser, blood stained face and all, darting across the ring. Alix readies herself to meet his charge with a ruinous aerial counterattack. But he moves with preternatural speed and by the time she properly balances herself, he's joining her at the height of the ring post. She stages a defense of her position, but Frank's brute strength renders her efforts pointless, and he propels her through the sky with a Kurt Angle-esque belly to belly suplex! Alix plummets into the canvas, scarcely able to do more then sob in misery and pray that the powerful move didn't manage to fracture any of her bones. To make matters worse for COD, by the time Charles is finally able to convince Krista to leave the ring, Frank runs towards her position and shoves her off the apron. She slams into the guardrail, where concerned fans instantly begin patting her on the back and make sweet efforts to nurse her back to health. Her pride seems more hurt then any part of her body, and she dedicates her time on the outside not to thanking her admires for their support, but to yelling “ I told you so, asshole!” at an apologetic Robinson

COACH
That's why you don't go fuckin' wit Midwest thugs! Soft ass Cali bitches get merked trying that shit!

Robinson is required to pull his attention away from the beautiful, but enraged blond on the outside, in order to count Uber's pinfall.

ONE


TWO

THRE...but Alix kicks out, and her escape causes Rhode Island to shout in happiness. Uber isn't able to comprehend how Alix evaded certain defeat, and his appalled eyes turn on Robinson, who he vehemently accuses of being involved in a mass conspiracy to deny him his rightful gold. In fact Uber's confusion over the failed pinfall is so intense that it permits him to do nothing more then shake his head and weakly mouth the words “Impossible”over and over again

COACH
Uber's straight buggin out! Get it together, duke.

Still in disbelief, Uber drags his depressed remains to his corner where a tag brings Big Frank back into the contest. Quite unlike his little sibling, Big Frank wastes little time in feeling sorry for himself, and makes moves to finish the task that Uber failed to complete. Taking Alix by her chocolate colored hair, The Man of Tomorrow drags her to her feet. She mounts and admirable rebellion against his clutches, but he easily snuffs out her fire with a clubbing forearm to back. With the energetic fighter temporally subdued , Frank foists her high into the sky in a press slam position. He twirls around, showcasing his prey to the furious audience, increasing their rage with each one of his contemptuous smirks. Finally he lets her go free, unceremoniously dumping her from his grasp. The drop from the peak of the move to the ring floor is a significant one, and leaves her short of breath and in a great deal of agony.  For his part, Big Frank turns to the referee and sadistically informs him that he'll be a first hand witness to the first ever in ring death in OAOAST history. Crass exaggeration aside, Frank continues making her life a living hell by pumping stomps into her sobbing face. Concerned for Alix's safety, Robinson pleads with Big Frank to show even a miniscule sign of spotsmanship. But BFB has no capacity for mercy and proceeds to further torture Alix with these stomps. Finally he completes his assault, and lies across her heaving chest for a pinfall.

ONE


TWO

Alix kicks out, infuriating Big Frank, but popping the audience who thought that this contest was all but over. He decides to make her regret the day she ever escaped his pin attempt, and ensnares her into a sleeper hold.

COLE
Right now Alix is down on the mat with a multi time NCAA wrestling champion, and a former amateur wrestling world champion. That is not a place you really want to be. Alix has got to get to Krista, and far away from Big Frank!

The affects of the sleeper are immediate; a painful constricting of her breathing. This is more then a mere rest hold for Alix. Rather it is an onerous battle to remain conscious. Big Frank does her effort to stay awake no favors, violently cranking on her neck, torquing it as roughly as his strength will allow, putting a look of evident discomfort on her normally cute face. The supportive crowd promptly takes up the task of cheering on the babyface, singing her name in unison. 

“ALIX! ALIX! ALIX!” they shout, while the camera focuses on an apron based Krista yelling words of encouragement.

Gaining strength from their kindness, Miss Spezia bucks and roars against the strongman's epic restraints. BFB's response is to simply tighten his grasp, and let her drift into a comfortable slumber. But this doesn't manage to stop our adorable heroine from continuing to war against his move. Eventually her frantic movement is able to weaken his clutches just enough that she's able to bring herself to her feet. Bruiser follows her upright, wrought with panic that his move is dangerously close to evaporating. His worry turns out to be well founded, as Miss Spezia launches a calvary of elbows into his ribcage that shred at his clutches. The eighth strike shatters the hold altogether, but Alix is far from free from psychotic strongman, and he drives this point home by hooking her into a front facelock. Rather then bother to try and bleed a submission attempt out of her, Frank decides that he'll simply break her neck with an Implant DDT. Thus he lifts her into the air, ready to scramble her brains with one deadly move. But Alix turns the tables on him, taking a precarious hold of his neck, then shooting her body backwards and driving him into the mat with a modified DDT!

“YEAAAAA!”

But the crowd's era of good feelings is morbidly short lived, as they watch Frank immediately rise to his feet like a demon emerging from the simmering flames of hell. His arms quickly coil around her waist, snapping her slender frame into pieces as if they were twin boa constrictors. Once the air is totally dragged out of her lungs his anacondas fling her overhead, imprinting her into the canvas with a belly to belly suplex. He heralds his triumph by kissing his 25” bicep as he confidently strolls towards her battered body. Upon reaching her, BFB dives sideways and drives the tip of his elbow into her face with pinpoint accuracy. A pinfall attempt follows shortly thereafter.

ONE


TWO

Somehow Alix summons enough fighting spirit to lift her shoulder into the air, driving the Rhode Island natives wild with surprised glee. Heard loud and clear over the burning heat of the crowd is Big Frank Bruiser proclaiming that Robinson is a “Fucking pencil dick faggot who's too god damn stupid to count to three!”

COACH
You'd think after Robinson's enormous screwup at Mainframe Monday that he'd be trying to get himself back in the good graces of the Bruisers. I can't believe they even let this moron officiate anymore tag title matches.

Tired of dealing with an opponent who's obviously not weakened enough to be pinned, Frank allows Uber the chance to deliver more abuse to their nearly crippled enemy.

COLE
You have to ask yourself how much more of this punishment Alix can take? She's much tougher then she looks but she's in the ring with two of the nastiest men in all of pro wrestling, and can't last much longer.

Alix winces in stringent pain, as the redneck her bulldozes into a neutral corner with lightning quick kicks to the stomach. Ally Cat is pressed against the turnbuckles, where she desperately tries to regain her rapidly depleting breath. But Uber keeps his attack steady like a metronome, and launches her towards the opposite corner with an irish whip. Alix smacks against the pads, then staggers towards the center of the ring, the salty combination of sweat and tears in her brown eyes making it impossible to see more then a few inches in front of her face. So it comes as a tremendous surprise when The Pyscho Gremlin upends her with a back body drop. The physical shock of the move is even worse then the mental version, and she rests on the mat spasming in pain. Uber is able to still her body long enough to attempt another pin.

ONE



TWO

But Ally kicks out, upsetting the few audience members who don't wish to watch her take any more of the brutal beatings. Uber, on the other hand, is thrilled to inflict more damage upon her body, and acts on these desires by scrapping her off the mat, then driving her back down with a bodyslam. Another cover follows the basic hold.

ONE


TWO


Alix delays defeat just a little bit longer by kicking out. Unfortunately there is no rest for her weary bones, and Uber grabs hold of her bright white tube top and hauls her to her feet. He lathers her with an ensemble of forearms, each beating her ample chest like a drum, causing Alix to sing sorrowful blues. Uber then whips the champion to the corner, and trails her path with a clothesline. Right as the immense pain of the attack settles on her body,her assailant commences ripping into her badly bruised midsection with stomps. A female fan in the front row actually has the unbelievable audacity to heckle Bruiser for his treatment of Alix. Not about to let such discourtesy go unpunished, Uber hurls a wad of spits towards the young lady!

COACH
Uber doesn't go down to the crack house and tell that chick how to suck dick, so she shouldn't come down to the arena and tell him how to wrestle.

While the moralistic fans decry his savage display, Uber is already executing his next move, a standard brainbuster. However Alix prevents her brain from being busted by latching onto the ring ropes as if her approaching middle age life depended on it. Despite his unrivaled strength, Bruiser can't manage to overpower the rope aided resistance of his foe. The frustration of the failure overwhelms Uber, and twists his face into a dark grimace as he allows Alix to go free. He then attempts to separate her head from her body with a lariat. Yet, Alix barely manages to dodge the beheading, rolling bellow the deadly weapon and turning Uber into even more of an irate madman. He tries to bust the Los Angeles native wide open with a fearsome running forearm smash. But Alix evades the strike with a swift kick to his  gut. She snags a doubled over Uber into a front facelock, then spikes his cranium into the mat with a textbook DDT, drawing a huge ovation from the fans! Refusing to accept defeat at the hands of his much smaller foe, Uber makes the fatal error of standing right up, and eats a second DDT for his gaffe. He doesn't quite his learn lesson and makes a less then triumphant return to his vertical base. This time his headstrong blunder earns him Alix's version of the tornado DDT the Sucker Free DDT! The rabid fans heartily applaud for the DDT triplets, as the world seems to wave and swim before Uber's blurred vision. 

“LET'S GO ALIX! LET'S GO ALIX!”

Frank is much less encouraging to his brother then the crowd is to Alix, demanding that he either get up and fight or “puss out” and tag him. His head a jumbled mess, Uber choses option B, and slogs his way towards his waiting partner. No one in the arena seems to be paying any attention to the Bruiser's situation, as they are much to focused on mobilizing Alix to her corner. Sweat pouring down her face, and turning her hair into something resembling a damp mop, Ally begins the perilous journey to her corner. She looks on the verge of passing out, and each step she takes towards Krista seems like it might be her last. For her part, Krista promises Alix the world if she can just find it within her to somehow make the tag with her. Krista's prayers don't go unanswered, and Alix finally reaches her trembling hand, causing the sold out crowd to erupt with joy.

“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” chant the fans, not detecting that Uber has made the tag to The Man of Tomorrow.

The newest competitors blaze a trail towards one another. The monumental meeting of the tag team's de facto leaders ends with Frank being leg lariated off his feet. Krista doesn't bother to celebrate her minor victory, instead deriving her pleasure from blasting Uber with a dropkick. But just as soon as he goes down, does big brother come back up, ready to end this COD nuisance once and for all. But Krista has other ideas in mind, namely whipping Frank into the ropes. She lowers her head as BFB returns from the cables, but the big man leapfrogs the champ and lands behind her. He twirls around to knock her head into the third row with a discus punch, but Krissy counters the strike by stunning him with an inverted atomic drop! The Man of Tomorrow clutches his (allegedly) 10” python, and screams in white hot pain, as the crowd hoots and hollers over his misery. Their soon given even more to cheer about as Krista winds up and annihilates what's left of his blood soaked nose with a superkick!

COACH
She calls that sequence Krista's Great California Adventure. But ain't nothing great about having to wear that Rip Hamilton mask for the rest of ya days because a fitness instructor kicked ya nose off ya face.

Uber retries his poor luck with Miss California, attempting to sneak attack her with a clubbing forearm. But thanks to a cry of “look out” from a little girl in the first row, Krista is able to block Bruiser's blow with an elbow strike. Uber stumbles backwards, instinctively nursing the fresh cut above his eye. This leaves him prey to any manner of viscous assaults, and Krisy capitalizes on this fact, by leaping into is back, and putting her knees to her chest to pulverize him with a lung blower! This time Uber's howls aren't ones of triumph, but rather of raw agony. Hearing his siblings cries of distress, Frank rises to his feet and crazily directs a Soonerline towards Miss California's lovely face. What the move packs in rage, it lacks in technique, form and most importantly speed, and Krista is easily able to duck bellow it and move herself behind Frank. The momentum of his miss clumsily carries him forward, but he's held into place by Krista's hands being wrapped around his bloodied face. His entire body is violently dragged downward by the force of Krista's ode to Redd Fox the [b]Elizabeth, I'm coming to join ya, honey! It's the big one!”[/b] (Reverse X-Factor). The fans squawk with excitement, getting louder when Krista hooks the leg for a pinfall.

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

CROWD
[b]THREE![/b]

No, no, no, no! At the last possible minute, Uber breaks up the count, infuriating the pro-COD fanbase. But their dour mood begins to improve when Krista and a recovered Alix begin seizing on The Pyscho Gremlin with brutal stomps. He manages to rise to his feet past their torrent of kicks, but this only puts him in a far worse situation as the girls launch him into the corner. He smacks against the posts with a booming thud, too worn down by the night's festivities to effort any sort of escape. Taking advantage of Uber's weakness, Alix charges in with a lariat. Needless to say a lariat from a bulimic woman doesn't exactly bring much hurt to Uber's world. But the pain quickly begins to mount when Krista follows Alix by slashing her bare knee into Bruiser's face! As the cut on Uber's head begins to ooze gobs of blood, Ally lies on the mat, and Krista takes hold of her shapely legs. The blond bombshell dives backwards, lifting Alix into the air, and shooting her towards their rival. Uber tries to evade his approaching attacker. But the blood in his eyes causes him to misjudge her movement, and the speeding bullet rips into his stomach with a shoulder block!

“C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!”

Big Frank, head lowered like a rampaging bull, rushes towards Krista. However the blond bombshell effortlessly avoids his approach by leapfrogging over him. Undettered by the avoidance, Big Frank continues his charge, fixing his murderous intent upon Alix. This becomes a severe error in judgment, as Alix counters the attack by striding forward, wrapping her arms around his waist, flipping into the air, and liquidizing his skull with the [b]Burning Sensation When You Urinate![/b](Sunset flip piledriver) While the audience reacts with pleasure to the showy attack, Alix pins bone weary Frank.

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

Uber descends upon the pinfall with a body splash! Rather then be smushed between the muscle bound brutes, Ally quickly slides her body out of the way, leaving Uber to collide with his partner. Unlike his brother, who emits horrible groans of pain, Uber is seemingly unhurt by his humiliating folly. He stands up to get a measure of revenge on the plucky lasses, but the only thing that he receives for his troubles is a double dropkick that sends him out the ring!

COLE
These fans are on the edge of their seats, and the action is just going to continue later on tonight in the Lethal Rumble and with the second ever Survive or Surrender match, but right now these two teams are battling over the most prized possession in all of tag team wrestling!

With Bruiser incapacitated for the time being, Krista turns to pin Frank and bring this contest to a close. But The Man of Tomorrow has risen to his feet, and a look of solid hatred burns through his crimson mask. Easily able to  match BFB's rage, Krista skids along the canvas, lunging for him with a yakuza kick. But, in one sickeningly smooth motion, Big Frank sidesteps her attacking leg, snakes his hands around her waist, then shoots her backwards with a release German Suplex! The second she hits the ground, Big Frank stands up, ready to turn his powerful attacks upon her bubbly partner. But Alix is several steps ahead of him, and uses her considerable speed to rock him with an enziguri! Frank plummets to the canvas and immediately rolls himself to the outside to attend to his bloodied and beaten head. Not wishing to give her enemy anytime to recover his strength, Ally stalks him outside where she vigorously pumps his face into apron. Back in the ring, Krista unsteadily rises to her feet, not at all sure of where her fellow competitors went. She becomes aware of Uber Bruiser's location in a most painful manner, as The Pyscho Gremlin stuns her with a crippler crossface! The audience promptly and loudly begs her to fight free of the deadly submission. And fight out she does, desperately scrambling her way towards the salvation of the ring ropes. Yet, Uber isn't willing to allow her the freedom she seeks, and rains forearms into her face right as she reaches the cables. But his efforts to withold her in his grasp become moot, as Alix knocks him off her gal pal with a majestic 619! Surprisingly the crowd chooses to the boo after the move, rather then let loose with the expected cheer of approval. Their ill feelings no longer come as much of a shock as the camera pans out to show Big Frank Bruiser in the ring, body stained crimson, and eyes staring daggers at Ally. Despite the audience screaming a plethora of warnings, Alix endures a mighty shock when her opponent takes her off her feet with a side Russian leg sweep! He turns Krista, who's still seeking to recover from the crossface, and grabs her left leg, seeking out a half crab. But Krista isn't nearly as helpless as Frank would've liked, and her right leg kicks the big man into the cables. The ropes push him back into a small package from Krista, that has the crowd blaring with frantic elation!

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

CROWD
THRE...

Frank kicks out, generating a wealth of heat from the Providence natives. Krista shares in their annoyance, but doesn't let her negative emotions prevent her from dealing with an opponent she knows is near defeat. She bounds off the ropes, delicately timing her movement so that she reaches The Man of Tomorrow right as he stands up. Her carefully planned move is executed perfectly and she SPEARS the off balance superstar to the mat the moment he rises, thrusting the fans into a frenzy! A pin follows the impressive move.

CROWD
ONE

CROWD
TWO

Uber, who had been outside the squared circle, reaches into the ring to pull Krista off his brother just as Robinson was about to make the pivotal three count!

[b]“BOOOOO!”[/b]

Ally greatly pleases the enraged spectators by bouncing off the ropes and delivering a baseball slide into Uber's face. The strike pushes Uber back several feet, and expands the gaping wound on his forehead, but it fails to bowl him over. Thus the girls are required to come up with a technique that will exterminate the fierce canine permanently. After a moment's discussion, Alix elevates herself onto Krista shoulders. Taking great care not to drop Ally from her risky perch, Krista glides towards the edge of the ring. Once Kris is in position, Alix arches backwards, in a movement resembling a reverse hurricana. Krista keeps hold of Alix's furry boots, then uses them to lever her back over, and catapult her onto prostrate Uber with a modified splash to the outside! Krista, the referee, the announcers, and everyone in attendance watch with enchanted awe as the high risk move yields a high reward, when Alix's attacking body knocks Uber out of this contest, and possibly out of this industry!

“C-O-D! C-O-D! C-O-D!”

COLE
Wow! That's their little used double team finisher called the Lesbequick!

With fate of The Bruiser family legacy in his hands alone, Frank darts towards Krista, only to be met with a kick to the stomach. She hooks him into a lazy front facelock, thinking she can easily end his night with a simple DDT. As always, pride comes before the fall, and Krista pays for her over confidence when Frank spins out of her weak hold, and drags her to the mat with an anklelock!

COLE
I don't think we've ever seen Frank use this move before!

That turns out to be for good reason, because his unfamiliarity with the move may cost him the match! Krista, with unerring ease, turns over onto her back, then rockets her upper body upright and pulls Frank down into a small package!

CROWD
ONE!


CROWD
TWO!


CROWD
[b]THREE![/b]

But Frank pulls out of the pinning situation, but with a hand still on Krista's foot, he's able to do so while moving back into the anklelock! The hold is far tighter then before, and Krista can feel the tendons and bones in her foot began to snap away as the pressure of the move increases by the second. Her hands reach out for the ropes, but Big Frank drags her back towards the center of ring, demanding that she tap out and relinquish her belt to him. Spit pours out of his vulgarity spewing mouth, and dried blood cakes off his screaming face as he wrenches her limb, causing her to shriek in terror.

“KRISTA! KRISTA! KRISTA!” bleat the audience.

Krista isn't willing to wave good-bye to championship, but but by the same token she's no longer able to stomach the building pain. Thus she's pressured into putting forth one last make or break effort to outwit the dreadful animal. Once again she manages to turn onto her back, but not without causing great discomfort to her ankle. She struggles past the misery and sits up to overtake Frank in another rollup. As she says a prayer to gods above that this pinfall will be the final one of the match, Charles Robinson makes the crucial count.

CROWD
ONE


CROWD
TWO

COACH
Kick out, Frank!

CROWD
[b]THREE!!!!!!![/b]

There is no last minute kickout, no 2.9999999 escapes. This match is finally over, and the arena shakes with the spectators' cheers as a result. Frank can't believe that this isn't some sort of terrible nightmare and pleads with Robinson to restart match and give him a second chance. Charles, who's had his fairshare of issues with the Bruisers as of late, simply screams “DON'T START NO SHIT, IT WON'T BE NO SHIT!” then runs away.

BUFFER
THE WINNERS AND STILL CHAMPIONS......CHICKS OVER DICKS!

Alix isn't very concerned with the fact that Krista's ankle nearly got broke, and leaps into her arms in celebration. She orders Krista to carry her towards the back, a request Krista is much too tired to argue over. While they depart, The Bruisers sit in somber silence, wondering how they failed to reclaim their title belts.

COLE
The Bruisers coming up short tonight, but they still have a chance to get back in title contention by winning the Anderson Cup. The road isn't easy for them, though, as they will face Black T in the second round in what should be a fantastic match up!

Edited January 28, 2007 by Patty O'Green