PROMO: "Underground Hits From What's-Their-Name"

[Chuck Woolery 0]

"Yeah, Miranda, I'm almost at the airport, I was just calling to check in is all."

 

The brick-red Cadillac Escalade is the scene, and Calvin Szechstein is the man talking, eyes focused on the Chicago roads as he conversates with his assistant. "Well, I'm glad Fred was pleased with our showing at Clusterfuck."

 

"So it didn't bother him that we lost?"

 

"No, it's not a big deal to me, either, it's just that Fred is the type of gentleman to get caught up in semantics."

 

"Well, that's good, at least. I assume we lost the Alpha Dog sponsorship?"

 

"Well, at least we got something to replace it."

 

"Yeah... look, Miranda, I'm almost at the airport. Give me a call if anything comes up."

 

*click*

 

Szechstein parks the Cadillac in front of the airport, and before too long Zack Malibu opens the trunk, throwing his travel back in.

 

"Hey, Zack."

 

"Hey, Calvin. Thanks for picking me up."

 

*slam!*

 

Malibu opens the passanger side door, climbing into the Escalade as Calvin drives off.

 

"Yeah, man, I really appreciate you not making a big deal out of me not being here all week."

 

"It's nothing, Zack."

 

"I had to fly to Toronto to do press for Anglemania, do the tour, grease some hands... you know the business, Cal."

 

"Yeah."

 

Quiet settles in on the Escalade, the sounds of Jack Johnson emoting through the vehicle, but Zack turns the volume down, speaking once more.

 

"So when's our rematch?"

 

Calvin appears caught off guard. "What rematch?"

 

"Uh, our rematch with Wild and Dangerous? I know you've been out of the business for a couple years, Calvin, but you know we're entitled to a rematch after the way things ended at Clusterfuck."

 

"Uh... why?"

 

"What do you mean, why?"

 

"Zack, we lost. They're the better team. Let's move on."

 

It's Zack's turn to be caught off guard. "What?"

 

"Zack, it's not a big deal. There's what, three tag teams in this federation? We'll see them again."

 

"Absolutely not, Calvin. This is a huge deal."

 

"I'm sorry, I'm not making the connection."

 

“HE’S GOT HIM!” King shouts as the audience lets out a booming cheer… but before the Caribbean can secure the cradle, Calvin rolls through, taking Wildchild with him and pinning his shoulders to the mat instead! Everyone’s mouth drops in shock and Herrington drops to count for:

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

Johnny barely sees the pin in time and he scrambles towards the ring, “-and the Barracuda just dove into the ring, under the bottom rope!” shouts Francis. “He’s going to try and break up this pin but I don’t think he can get there in time!”

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

Johnny jumps to his feet and sprints towards Calvin! Szechstein sees him but just closes his eyes, knowing that he’ll take a hit…but the match is his!

 

 

 

 

THREEEEEEEEEE!

 

 

 

 

*CRACK!*

 

 

 

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAH!”

 

 

 

 

Herrington nearly pulls his arm out of his socket trying to stop the count, and he does with his hand hovering a centimeter over the canvas when Johnny scrambles into the ring , jumps up and lands a basement dropkick into Calvin Szechstein’s jaw to the joy of thirty thousand!

 

 

“HE GOT THERE! JOHNNY MADE IT IN THE NICK OF TIME!”

 

Calvin, stunned, falls backwards from the hit and Wildchild rolls through! Once more Wildchild finds himself on the right side of a rolling cradle for the pin only this time he secures it, bridging backwards as the referee counts and Johnny stands idly, counting with Herrington and the crowd for:

 

 

ONE!

 

 

 

 

TWO!

 

 

 

 

THREEEEEEEEEE!

 

 

 

 

DING! DING! DING!

 

 

 

 

“YEAAAAAAAAAAH!”

 

 

 

Wild and Dangerous head out of the ring and start making their way towards backstage. Tonight they beat a team that everyone said they should…and now they feel like they can focus on the one item that this team made their legacy with—the SWF Tag Team Championship…

 

The Cadillac Boys, on the other hand, continue to glare bitterly towards the forms of their retreating opponents…

 

"Listen, Calvin. I understand that you're not a wrestler, and I understand that this team might not be the most important thing to you..."

 

"Hold on, Zack."

 

"No, you hold on, Calvin. If you have any pride left, you'll understand where I'm coming from when I say that me and you, as a team, are so much more than a stepping stone, Calvin."

 

"... well, I don't understand."

 

"We were set up to fail, Calvin! Don't you see this? They gave us our wins and then they fed us to the wolves. They knew that I wrestled the most important match of my life three days prior, and they knew I won the Lethal Rumble, and they made sure to book us against their boys three days later so that Wild and Dangerous could look so good, vanquishing those nasty OAOASTers on their way to their fifth tag title reign."

 

"As logical as that sounds."

 

"But they aren't that good, Calvin. There's more to the wrestling world than the SWF, and let's be honest with each other, I wasn't all there. With me having two weeks to rest, and you being, well, you."

 

"Why don't you stop making excuses, Zack?"

 

Again with the caught-off-guard. "Excuse me?"

 

"It doesn't matter if you're all there or not. You were paid to wrestle on January 31st against Wild and Dangerous, you showed up, and you lost. If you were in that bad of shape where you shouldn't have been wrestling, why even show up?"

 

"Calvin..."

 

"Besides, Landon came in second in the Lethal Rumble, and he was alive enough to win the Clusterfuck..."

 

"CALVIN."

 

"Uh uh, Zack, if you get your tirade I get mine too. You need to man up--yeah, Zack, man up--and accept that you lost."

 

Zack swallows this, eyeing Calvin, whose focus is still on the road first and foremost. Finally, in almost a whisper, Zack says, "I can accept that I lost, Calvin."

 

"Thank you."

 

"But I'm a fighter, and if somebody beats me and takes a little bit of my pride, I've got to get it back. I want that rematch, Calvin, And you need to man up and get your pride back. You're the one who got robbed of a pinfall, not me."

 

Calvin, finally, looks over at Zack. "You're not gonna give this up, are you?"

 

"No."

 

Calvin sighs. "I'll see what I can do."

 

FADE TO BLACK.

[Toxxic 0]

Hmm, now this is an interesting dynamic that I'll look forward to seeing more of. However, I should note that both Landon and I will have serious objections to the notion of a fifth W&D tag title reign coming at our expense.

 

Serious objections.

[Mr. S£im Citrus 0]

Object all you want to, we don't give a damn...

 

Actually, if we had to beat somebody else, that would be even better for the story we'd prefer to build.

 

But, all things be equal, we'll just try to take them off you, anyway...