HD: Megan Skye Vs??? + Abdullah puts ppl on blast

[Patty O'Green 0]

GET IT? SKYE TH LIMIMT?

 

A pumping bass vibrates throughout the arena, while dark blue spotlights bounce in a frenzied fashion across the metallic entrance stage. As the chart busting, club thumping hit [i]Voodoo Child[/i] by the Rouge Traders rises to it's full zenith, red and yellow lights clash for presence with the deep blue incumbent. Through the parting entrance doors, steps the beautiful but cruel, Megan Skye. Outfitted in tight blue leather pants, and a midriff exposing half black half blue leather tank top, “The Perfect 10” glowers at the invasive camera, before rudely pushing it away and strutting towards the ring with arrogance in her step.

BUFFER
The following match is scheduled for one fall with a televised time limit of ten minutes! Now making her way to the ring from Pawtucket, Rhode Island....MEAAAGAAAAN SKYEEEEEE!

The announcement of her name is not warmly received by the Canadian audience, but Megan celebrates it by preening and primping in the fashion of her absentee boyfriend, Mister Landon Maddix.

COACH
Not to insult Landon, or anything, but it often times seems that Megan is the brains behind his success. It's somewhat questionable about how far he'd be able to make it without her around. But tonight we get to see her on her own in singles competition.

Pawtucket's most famous resident enters the squared circle to once again be treated to a round of boos, taunts, and lewd sexual come ons, and if you've seen some of the women Thunder Bay can produce you'd probably come on to a god damn moose. Skye goes through a series of stretches she no doubt learned at her night Kickboxing classes at a Pawtucket community college, as she prepares for her unknown foe.

An eerily spoken refrain from a strained female voice oozes through the speakers...

[i]Monster
How should I feel?
Creatures lie here
Looking through the window[/i]

COACH
Who the hell is this? It better not be no fat bitch! I'm warning ya'll!

As the attendees express similar questions and reservations over the possibility of a fat bitch, a Gothic influenced pop beat joins the frightened, yet sweetened female vocals of Meg & Dia's [i]Monster[/i]. [color="#00FF00"][b]Green[/b][/color] and [color="#FFFF00"][b]gold[/b][/color] lights flicker at the sides of the Angletron as the powerfully tortured chorus beams it's regrets to the world. Tall pillars of smoke steam from the tip of the entrance ramp. Through the chaotic multi colored haze emerges a figure that assuages all fears of a fat chick. A young girl stands amidst the swirling fumes, her dark red lips curled into an infectiously joyful smile. Though no taller then 5'2, she cuts a striking presence, in a short black skirt, a two sizes too small black Muse t-shirt, and a boquet of white flowers clenched in her left hand. Her perfectly shaped oval face, and pouty grey eyes sunken underneath black mascara, are partially obscured by a flowing white wedding veil.

BUFFER
And the opponent..from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada...[b][color="#FF0000"]MAGGGGIEEEE NEERRRRRDLLLLY[/color][/b]!

The crowd reacts with some measure of shock, certainly not expecting to be graced with an appearance by a member of Canada's most prestigious wrestling family. With her blond hair, tinged with red highlights, trailing behind her, the delighted darling zips down the ramp, slapping hands, and exchanging smiles with her fellow Canadians. She slides into the oaoast ring for the first time in her career an uncontrollable ball of nerves and spirited energy. While the hardened Megan watches with bitter contempt, Maggie stands in the center of the squared circle and points her bouquet towards each individual turnbuckle. As her floral arrangement is directed to each corner, a tower of [color="#00FF00"][b]green[/b][/color] pyro explodes from it's top turnbuckle. With the impressive pyrotechnic display complete, the still smiling Maggie tosses her bouquet behind her back and into the audience.

COLE
Well, this is Maggie Nerdly, the eighteen year old sister of Abdullah, Melody, Marvin and Melvin. I must say that it's a gre....

COACH
Wait, shut up, how old did you say?

COLE
She graduated high school very early at just seventeen, and only turned eighteen a [i]few days ago[/i].

COACH (nearly jumping out of his chair in joy)
Got dayum, that skeet can get the biddy!

COLE
I wonder what it would be like to have ten sister in laws and eight brother in laws, Coach.

COACH
What are you talking about? I'm just tryin' to kick it wit' a bitch, I ain't tryin' to marry one.

Once Maggie removes her various bridal inspired accouterments and dishes them to a ring side attendant, the referee calls for the bell...

DING DING DING!

The affair begins with a standard collar and elbow tie up, and the two competitors immediately begin jockeying for position. Their battle is brief, however, and ends when Mags amazingly shoves Megan halfway across the squared circle. Megan isn't intimidated by Maggie's impressive show of power and after scraping herself off, meets Maggie for a second lockup. The preppy babyface once again wins the encounter as she sweeps Megan off her feet with sneaky leg trip. The long haired blond mounts her SWF foe, and begins pumping fist after fist into her lovely face. Not wishing to be turned into a human punching back, Megan pushes the preppy baby face off her body, then gives her taste of her own bitter medicine by mounting her and attacking her with closed fists. But Megan's advantage last for all of two seconds before Maggie turns the tide, and resumes her own mounted punching. Megan has had enough of this exchange, and uses a gap in between their bodies to escape beneath the ropes in order to catch her breath. At this point a rotund male audience member, rudely accuses Megan of having a “rat face.” She replies by informing him that's he's a fat ass, which reduces him to tears, because up until that point he had never realized he was fat. Now his whole body of work has been rendered meaningless by this starling realization.

COLE
Megan is as every bit as disgusting a human being as Landon!

COACH
Fool shoulda lost some weight before he showing up looking like Lord Rexington Fear. Only Melody will that get reference.

The Western Canadian diva follows her enemy outside, which instantly puts Skye's black boots on the move. She frantically returns to the ring to avoid the vexatious eighteen year old. Ever the determined one, Maggie begins to chase after her cowardly foe. Yet as she slides into the ring, Megan attempts to flatten her with an elbow drop. Fortunately for Papa Nerdly's baby girl, she's able to pull her body away from the downward trajectory of the strike. This is quite a terrible happening for Landon Maddix's better half, as her elbow violently crunches into the canvas. Clutching her hurt arm, she rises upright, but gets no rest for her weary bones as a returning Maggie meets her with a series of wild elbow strikes. After weakening her with the attacks, she whips Megan into the ropes. Skye goes onto the offensive by diving towards Maggie's side, and pulling the Nerdly babe down with a roll up pin! Elderly referee Clem Buzzlefoxer counts the first fall of the contest...

ONE


TWO

Maggie shoots her shoulder off the mat, earning a polite round of applause from the audience. She stands up, readying herself to take the fight to her hated rival. But Megan keeps her on the defensive when she pushes her down to the ground with a surprise spear! Thinking that basic move is enough to put the young lass away, Skye hooks the leg for a pinfall.

ONE


TWO

But, Maggie kicks out once more, and gains another series of polite applause. Megan, however, feels that this latest escape is just beginners luck and tires for another pinfall.

ONE

COLE
This could be it right here!

TWO

And again Maggie Nerdly escapes the jaws of defeat. Megan finally takes the hint, and realizes that her younger foe isn't quite ready to take the loss. Thus she stands her up and peppers her with a series of jabs. The fast moving blows back the Edmonton native into a nearby corner, and allow Skye to punish her midsection with a series of savage shoulder strikes. The blows leave Maggie whimpering and wailing, and as Megan hooks her into a front facelock then moves her into a vertical suplex, it looks like the youngest diva on the roster may be over her head in the oaoast. But Mags proves she belongs  in the oaoast, when she slips out of Skye's loosely applied clutches, and lands behind the intensely disliked woman. She then school boys a stunned Megan, who hadn't even registered the fact that Maggie was no longer in her grip. Buzzlefoxer makes the count.

ONE



TWO


Megan pulls out of the pinfall, and hops to her feet, ready to strike down the annoying newcomer once and for all. But it's Megan who gets struck down, as Maggie upends her with a lariat! Megan gets back on her feet relatively quickly, but is knocked right back down by the same clothesline. She figures that fighting the plucky youngster head on isn't going to get her very far, and thus tries a different course action. The Rhode Islander sinks to her knees and innocently begs for a reprieve from the Nerdly daughter's “incredible might.” Despite warnings from a few audience members, Maggie doesn't wish to take advantage of an injured foe, and decides that Megan deserves the chance to recover from her wounds before continuing. And of course right as she decides that, her devious enemy recovers, and begins pelting her in the stomach with right hooks.

“BOOOOOO!”

COACH
Maggie's hot has hades, but dumb as rocks, just the way I like my girls.

COLE
I don't think being sporting and kind equates to a poor intellect. And shes' almost twenty years younger then you, Coach! She just turned eighteen two weeks ago!

COACH
I gots ta get my “legal but morally questionable sex” on. You know how it is, playa.

After weakening Maggie with sufficient body blows, Megan goes for a game winning home run swing, a lunging lariat. But Skye strikes out, as the teen starlet sweeps bellow the attacking arm. Maggie bounces off the ropes and returns to Landon's manager with a lariat of her own. However her strike is intercepted with a boot to the gut from Megan. The attack doubles the innocent doll over, and lets Megan easily trap her into a standing head scissors. But keeping Maggie in that position proves to be another matter entirely. One that The Perfect 10 fails miserably at. The charming teenybopper pulls away from Meg's clutches, then attaches her into a hammerlock. Before Skye can even properly mount a defense, Maggie is twirling her into a front face lock and nailing her with the [B]Happiness is Edmonton in your rearview mirror[/b] (Hammerlock DDT). Megan's body flops over onto it's back, drained of all life by the Canadian's deadly finishing hold. With Megan throughly defeated, Maggie makes the cover, smiling broadly as she does so.


ONE


TWO


THREE!

BUFFER
The winner, in her oaoast debut, MAGGIE NERDLY!

A small round of applause fills the arena, as [i]Monster[/i] plays over the sound system. A deliriously excited Maggie springs to her feet and makes the famous RAWK~! Hand signal, before she gets out of the ring to high five the fans in celebration of her first ever victory.

COLE
Quite the debut from the Nerdly family's newest contribution to the oaoast! We're both very happy to have her on our roster.

COACH
Both? You mean, all [i]three[/i] of us. Shit, in one of those Al-Qaeda ass Ali Babba countries you only gotta wait till a chick's nine to smash that ass. They hittin' 'em right out of Pampers and Huggies. With this girl, I'd be nailing a god damn senior citizen by their standards. This'd be like necrophilia over there in dothead land. 

COLE
[i]Dothead land[/i]?

COACH
skeet skeet skeet all over that yearbook picture.

COLE
Hey, who are those young ladies Maggie's talking to over there? Friends of hers?

COACH
We lookin' at a fourgy! Let me see these hos.

[IMG=http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y39/Portfree/uhoh.gif]

COACH
Aww shit! Naw, you got it all wrong, son. I'm a good Christian. I was just trying to find out who the girls was as persons so I could help 'em, maybe be like a big brother mentor and show them the right way. Teach 'em about Christ, our lord, our savior, our guiding light. Nothing bad was gonna happen. I'm a minister, please ignore this bottle of lube...

While Coach pleads his innocence we go to....

[B]COMMERCIAL BREAK[/B]

When HD returns, we're taken backstage where Abdullah Abir Nerdly, in an Edmonton Oilers hockey jersey, is trolling the premises for a sounding board for his many qualms and issues with the oaoast. Beside him is his older sister, Melody Nerdly, svelte figure packed into a red flannel shirt, tiny daisy duke shorts, and cowgirl boots. Eventually Abdullah eyes down a young security guard mingling at a catering table. Somehow the Syrian born grappler decides that this innocent soul is the perfect man to hear his problems and execute his plans for Anglemania. The guard stares at Abdullah with wistful eyes, his lonely heart yearning to lie between silk bedsheets,  legs interwined with a man of Abdullah's unequaled beauty. Of course this fantasy evaporates, when Abs opens his mouth and begins making ludicrous claims and outrageous demands.

ABDULLAH ABIR NERDLY
Buddy, buddy, buddy! As a security guard and a trusted [i]friend[/i], I hope you can offer me some much needed assistance! As you well know by now Anglemania is this Sunday, and everyone is abuzz with speculation over who's going end the night with the title of Mister Money In The Bank. But I can ease all these anxious minds right now, because the answer to that quandary is me, Abdullah Abir Nerdly, speaker for the prophets. I was predestined by the gods to take victory over these twenty other blasphemers. But, my destiny isn't what's important right now. What's important, friend, is your role in Abdullah's crowning moment. As you know, I'm a multinational hero in both Syria and Canada, and my easily earned victory in Money In The Bank match will be a humongous deal across the globe. That means there will be quite the number of people trying to get into my locker room backstage to offer congratulations to your's truly. This is a problem. Why? Because Toronto, Ontario, the location of Anglemania, is known to have some of foulest, ugliest, women in all of Canada. And I need you to run a block, play the bouncer, and keep those freaks far away from Mister Money in The Bank. Can you do that, friend?

GUARD
I guess. But, to be honest, I'm not so sure you're going to win.

Abdullah lets out a hearty laugh in response to that odd statement.

ABDULLAH
Who else could win besides me, [i]buddy[/i]? Who can eliminate a Syrian prince?

MELODY
Probably everyone in the known universe.

GUARD
One of the members of Black T could definitely do it.

Abdulah can't help but chuckle at the mere absurdity of this claim.

ABDULLAH
Black T?

GUARD
Yeah, didn't you watch last week? They put everyone in their place! It was amazing!

ABDULLAH
The only reason Black T was able to leave the ring without the aid of EMTs and a pair of stretchers is because I wasn't around to put [i]them[/i] in their place. If I had been there, I would've taken the Sword of Damascus to both their necks and you could say goodbye to the supposedly greatest oaoast tag team of all time! My good friend, Money in the Bank belongs to Abdullah Abir Nerdly, it's that simple. There's not a soul on this planet that can stop me from my guaranteed world title shot.

GUARD
What about Bohemoth? He beat you down a couple weeks ago!

The color is ripped clear off Abs' face, as the name of the Meterosexual Monster settles into his disturbed mind.

ABDULLAH
Bo..Bo...Bohemoth?! Let me wise you up on a little Bohemoth. His so-called “man handling” of me three weeks ago was born of pure jealously. Jealous of the success that my hard work has brought. Jealous that I am revered as a national hero in both Syria and Canada. Jealous of my religious beliefs. Jealous of the man, and jealous of the legend. There's is no reason he should treat me so disrespectfully! I never said a bad word about him! If he's such respectable representative of this company, as everyone claims, why would he attack an inspirational leader like me, instead of bowing at my feet and thanking me for my many contributions to society? It's like I said before: he's jealous. He should idolize me, not hate me, for I am the mighty dragon, and he is the scared villager! اعدكم الموت!  :throwup: 

MELODY
You're gay.

From off in the distance the pitter patter off frantically running footsteps is heard. The jogger quickly emerges on screen, revealing themselves to be Maggie Nerdly, still in wrestling gear, and terribly excited over her first victory.

MAGGIE
Abdullah! Melody!

Unable to control herself in the face of this enthusiasm, the speedy Maggie slams right into Abdullah, nearly knocking him into the security guard he's enlisted into his army.

ABULLAH
What in the good heavens?! Oh it's you. Hi, Melody.

MELODY
I'm Melody, you gooberstain. I've been standing next to you for like twenty minutes, how the hell could you not know that?

MAGGIE
And I'm Maggie!

ABDULLAH
Hmmm. When you have ten sisters it's difficult to keep them all straight.

MAGGIE
It's okay. But isn't this great? Me, you two, Marvin and Melvin all working together! I think that's pretty awesome, it's like a karmic apology from the world for all our older siblings having their heads shoved into toilets, their hair set on fire, and their underwear strewn up a flagpole.

MELODY
I tried to tell them Microsoft wasn't a safe place to work. The revenge of the Mac gods is swift and brutal! BWHAHAHHAAA!

MAGGIE
Melody, did you watch my match? Did I do well, big sis?

MELODY
I..I..well, uh Jade's  cat just died of uh...um...AIDs , maybe, yes, that's good, AIDs, and I had to comfort her in this time of suffering. You understand, Maggie.

MAGGIE (frowning in sympathy for Jade's “deceased” pet)
I didn't know cats could get AIDs.

MELODY
It's something we have to raise awareness on, get the message out. Rest in peace ya'll Ninjas, there's a heaven for a G. AIDS Virus, all your base are belong to us.

MAGGIE
Well, tell your friend Jade that I'm sorry about her kitten. But Abby, isn't this awesome? We both kicked a-double s in our debut match?

ABDULLAH
:( نني حزين جدا من هذا الحدث ويسوؤنا كثيرا لي

MELODY
LOL @ this WE@K azz n00b! Good one, Mags!

MAGGIE
Oh sorry, big brother. My fault! It's okay, Abby, you can still put in a kick ass showing at Anglemania. I know you can win The Money In The Bank match!

MELODY
ROTFLMFAO! Once again, I say good one, Maggie. Good one. Superior one, even. 133T one. How's he supposed to do that, when Bohemoth's going to be patrolling the ring, waiting to squash him like Mario does a goomba! I can see it now, excuse me Bohmeoth sir, could you not rip my arms off and use them beat my body like a bongo drum? No? Then do you mind not removing my spinal cord from the rest of my body? No? Okay, that's fine.

MAGGIE
How can you speak like that, Melody? 

MELODY
I open my mouth, and the words, and symbols, and numbers an acronyms, just come flying right out. Very amazing.

MAGGIE
You're wrong for that, Melody! We've all gotta stick together and encourage each other. You can't be so down on Abdullah. Come on, gang, let's be positive. Abby, this is an opportunity to test yourself against nineteen of the other toughest guys on the roster. Most people would kill for this chance, and you got it after only two weeks in the company.

MELODY
You had to make a few under the table deals with suspected terrorists, wanted criminals, and possible threats to United States security to do it, but who cares?

MAGGIE (ignoring her older sister)
Didn't we all come to the oaoast to fight the best in sports entertainment?

MELODY
I don't know what you're talking about, I came to get away from you people.

ABDULLAH (also ignoring Melody, which seems to be a recurring theme in this family)
Maggie, your pep talk is appreciated, but wasted, because my Money In The Bank victory, as the tagline goes, is etched in [i]stone[/i]. I shall lurk in the shadows of the ring, watching every move everyone makes. Inch by inch, step by step, second by second, I will patiently wait until the appropriate time to attack. And when that time comes, my struggle, and my heroics will finally bear fruit! Finally, my greatness will be rewarded! Money In The Bank will be my finest win, and their worst loss!  لكم كل كلبات قتلى بالرصاص ما تريد عندما لا تنطلي على اي دخان لكم تقويم المعسرين يخدع لك :spank: م 

MAGGIE
See, that's the Nerdly spirit!

With that enthused comment, Maggie gives a hug to her older siblings, then departs the scene to do whatever is eighteen year olds do. I don't know. Watch My Hitlist on MTV Hits. Lupe Fiasco had [i]Weapon of Choice[/i] on there, and that was word as fuck. Christopher Walken all day like a motherfucker.

MELODY
That's odd, I was always led to believe the Nerdly spirit involved being slammed against your locker, forking over all the money in your pocket, the keys to whatever residence contains your prized possessions, and a subsequent begging for your worthless life to be spared.

On that note screens across the globe return to sofa central.

COACH
You know Abdullah ain't related to Melody and Maggie like that. I mean he ain't, blood [i]blood[/i], you know what I'm saying? You think he ever...you know? Huh? I bet he does, I bet you!