Undertaker in London

[k thx 0]

Best advert yet.

 

[k thx 0]

The film opens with a shot of Undertaker touching up his makeup as he perches on a cloud high above 1910 London. The action then descends to earth where Steve Austin, a cockney jack-of-all-trades, introduces the audience to the McMahons, a well-to-do but troubled family headed by the cold and aloof Mr. McMahon and the loving but highly distracted Mrs. McMahon. The McMahon's latest nanny has just quit out of exasperation at the indiscipline of the McMahon children, Stephanie and Shane, a fact that Mrs. McMahon only belatedly becomes aware of, due to her ongoing preoccupation with suffragette rallies.

 

Upon learning of the situation, Mr. McMahon takes a personal hand in the hiring of a

replacement and advertises for a stern authoritarian type, while Stephanie and Shane draft their own proposal for a fun person who would not be a tyrant. Although Mr. McMahon rejects their idea, tears up their ad and throws it in the fireplace, the note magically flies up the chimney.

 

The next day there is a long queue of old (and thoroughly disagreeable, in the children's opinion) nanny candidates waiting at the McMahon's door. However, a strong gust of wind literally blows the queue away while Undertaker flies down with his urn to apply. The interview with Mr. McMahon goes quickly, when he is stunned to see this calmly defiant new nanny has responded to the children's ad (rather than his own) despite the fact he destroyed it. As he tries to fathom this mystery, Undertaker hires himself and begins work.

 

The children face surprises of their own as they discover that Undertaker's method of arrival is only the beginning of his magical talents; he possesses a bottomless bodybag, and makes the children's disordered nursery tidy itself to the tune of "American Badass." The magic continues with an outing in the country with "screever" Steve Austin that begins by literally jumping into one of his chalk pavement drawings, and later having tea while suspended in midair with Taker's joking "Kane" who floats uncontrollably whenever he laughs.

 

Mr. McMahon grows increasingly uncomfortable with his children's stories of their adventures and how they are enchanted by the new nanny. However, Taker effortlessly inverts his attempted dismissal of his services into a plan to take his children with him to the bank where he is employed. Unfortunately, the occasion takes a disastrous turn when Mr. HHH, Mr. McMahon's extremely roided employer, personally tries to persuade Shane to invest his money, which Shane intended for a local whore, to the point of stealing it out of the boy's hand. When Shane loudly protests, the other customers panic and start a run that forces the bank to suspend business. In the resulting chaos, the children flee in fear and wander into the slums of the East End of London. Fortunately, they literally run into Steve Austin, now employed as a chimney sweep. He takes them safely home while explaining that the incident at the bank does not mean their father hates them, but rather is a sign that he has preoccupying problems of his own.

 

Upon arrival at the McMahon's home, a departing Mrs. McMahon hires Steve Austin to watch the children, and he ends up sweeping the chimney while the children watch. Taker arrives back from his day off to caution the children about the hazards of that activity. Sure enough, the children are sucked up the chimney to the roof, and Steve Austin and Taker follow to retrieve them. Taking advantage of the situation, Taker and Steve Austin lead a tour of the rooftops of London that concludes with a joyfully energetic dance with Steve Austin's chimney-sweep colleagues as they demonstrate their acrobatic skill to the music of "Glass Shatters". A volley of fireworks from the McMahon's eccentric neighbor, Hulk Hogan, sends the gathering back down the chimney into the McMahon home.

 

Mr. McMahon arrives home, forcing Taker to conclude the festivities. McMahon then receives a phone call from work ordering him to return immediately for disciplinary action. As Mr. McMahon gathers his strength to face his superiors, Steve Austin points out that while Mr. McMahon does need to make a living, his offspring's childhood will come and go in a blink of an eye, and as a father he needs to be there for them while he can. A sombre and thoughtful Mr. McMahon proceeds to the bank where he is fired in the most humiliating way possible for causing the first run on the bank since 1773, when another officer loaned money to the British East India Company to help finance a shipment of The Great Khalli that was later tossed into Boston Harbor during the Boston Tea Party. However, after being left at a loss for words when ordered to give a statement about his dismissal, Mr. McMahon realizes the true priorities of life and gleefully uses Taker's all purpose word "Rollin'" to tweak Mr HHH. He then tells HHH one of Kane's jokes, and raucously departs to the amazement of his ex-colleagues. HHH mulls over the joke, finally "gets it" and floats up into the air, laughing...

 

The next morning, the winds have changed and to the children's sorrow, Taker must depart. However, Mr. McMahon, now loving and joyful, reappears after a long night's disappearance with a mended kite for the children and an urge to play with his family. Mrs. McMahon also realizes that she's been neglectful of her children, and supplies a tail for the kite, using one of her suffragette ribbons. They all leave the house without a backward glance as Undertaker watches from a window. In the park with other kite-flyers, Mr. McMahon meets Mr. HHH Jr. who says that his father literally died laughing at the joke. Instead of mournful, the son is delighted his father died happy and rehires Mr. McMahon to fill the sudden opening.

 

With his work done, Undertaker takes to the air with a farewell from Steve Austin.

[Matt Young 0]

Bumping due to awesomeness.

[Retard Girl 0]

thanx for bumping this awesome piece of wording!

[Guest RyechnaiaSobaka]

***1/2, would rent again but not buy.

[k thx 0]

I forgot about this. Good stuff.

 

They should do this on Raw. 10.0 ratings for sure.

[Lt. Al Giardello 0]

**3/4 solid, but needs work.