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Nighthawk

Ask Milky.

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These were popular briefly.

 

I will answer any god damn thing you ask, from "What is your favorite ice cream flavor?" to "Were you molested as a child?"

 

And I will give you as much detail as you want. For the sample questions, "Cherry Garcia" and "Yes, by my 16 year old babysitter when I was 8."

 

More details (about ice cream), ask.

 

I will answer anything, seriously.

 

TSM went through a fad of these threads, and I love tsm, so I'm doing it. Try me. I will tell you the truth.

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Drugs? Oh yes, I did about pretty much... all. But yes... this:

 

This has all reminded me of a really good story. I've told this to very few people, because whenever I do they pretty much call me a liar. But you guys will get it.

 

I used to date this girl, and we were in a band together. She played the guitar and I sang. And she had worked out something where we going to play during amateur night at some local club. Not a big thing, there were like 50 people in the audience. But I told her, "We should really make a huge impression. Let's do something really rock and roll. When I'm singing, make sure I don't know when it's coming, but just take your guitar and smash me over the head with it as hard as you can."

 

She did. And it really hurt a lot. I was like "Fuck, I know what I said, but that really hurt, you bitch!" I almost beat up my girlfriend in the middle of a show. I didn't hit her, but I tackled her, and our "song" totally dissolved. We wound up just doing acid with the rest of the local "bands" for the rest of the night, so my memory of the immediate events are a blur, but she told me later that that club had banned any of us from ever showing our faces there again.

 

That's a good example of why I worry about somebody taking my shit seriously. I also made an offhand comment once that "Skeletally anorexic girls are sexy." And I saw her again a week later and she said "I haven't eaten since the last time we talked. Are you happy?" "No, you dumbass, I didn't really mean that!" I ended up sitting on her and forcing a hot pocket down her throat.

 

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Have you ever brutalised a female (or male for that matter) during the course of a sexual act?

 

And yeah, same girl I mentioned there. Once I taped thumb tacks onto all my fingers, and beat the bleed out of her. But she wanted it. During? No I never did anything in the course of an act that she didn't want before. But I did beat the shit out of her. I made her hurt... bad. But she loved me. Do you know love? No. And did you know I love pain, and adore being beaten and cut, just pretty much... all the time. Well, I do. And whatever she wanted on top of that, I always topped her.

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Ok, marriage is basically an institution of the Bible. We used to need that, when the strongest and brightest led the clan. But now... it means as much as a monkey's dick. I could elaborate. But that's true, and I'm sleeping. And ask whatever you want, in the interim. But feel free to ask that again. Cause I have more to say.

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Theres a chick at work who has been giving me flirty looks and I have returned them. Whats the next course of action? I freeze anytime were at the copy machine.

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Guest Vitamin X

How much alcohol is too much? If you really function and don't let your alcohol or other drug addiction interfere with your daily life and all that, how bad is it really?

 

I used to rationalize when I was on meth all the time that if I stayed away from tweekers I was a better person. This one girl I knew also held that view, but then we started hanging around and hooking up all the time, so I felt that defeated the purpose. So, in a way, the best way I've seen to really reap the benefits of intoxication has been to do it alone. The only exception to this for the most part seems to be alcohol, which is definitely a much more social drug. I wonder what changes there.

 

Also, in honor of most magnificent leader, I unveil glorious portrait.

passionofthemilky.jpg

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Does a "Milky" have an expiration date? How does a Milky taste with cereal? Is a Milky ideal for Milkyshakes?

 

I get what you're going for here, but that's just silly. I will point out that there is an LL Cool J song called "Milky Cereal". And as for the Milky expiration date, the deathclock says I will die June 8, 2039. Smart money says I'll rise 3 days later, though. In addition, Dethklok is my favorite band.

 

Theres a chick at work who has been giving me flirty looks and I have returned them. Whats the next course of action? I freeze anytime were at the copy machine.

 

I sympathize with you here. There is a remarkably simple answer, though. You have to get her alone, away from work. So just say sometime, "Hey, you want to get lunch together?" or "Hey, shall we grab a coffee?" or whatever the devil it is you people do in England... trust me, if she's really flirting with you, this is exactly what she wants you to do. And if she's not, she'll say no, but you won't look like a fool, because you didn't say "Please go out with me.", you were just trying to be social. It's win/win. And when you've got her alone, just talk to her and be nice to her. It's easy. If even that makes you nervous, try it a couple times with girls there who you aren't interested in, as a decoy/warmup.

 

How much alcohol is too much? If you really function and don't let your alcohol or other drug addiction interfere with your daily life and all that, how bad is it really?

 

Too much is when it interferes with your life. Like Dr. Drew said, an alcoholic is someone who drinks in the face of consequences. If there aren't any... drink away. The only thing to consider here is your health, and how it makes you feel. Plus, are there no consequences because you drink in moderation, or because you're lucky?

I myself have faced a shitload of consequences and drank anyway, because the mild enjoyment I get from booze was more important to me than those consequences (isolating certain people, getting kicked out of my parents house... I should really be bowing down and thanking liquor for that one). So really it's a matter of priorities.

The other thing here is if we ever settled down and had kids. That would really alter the situation. But as single, healthy, young adults, we should be allowed to drink a fair amount. If we can't do it, who can? We just have to know that the answer to "How much is too much?" is not stagnant. It will change along with our lives.

 

PS I absolutely adore the picture.

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Also, in honor of most magnificent leader, I unveil glorious portrait.

passionofthemilky.jpg

Awesome.

 

Anyways Milky, have you been to other countries? If so, how where the sexual exploits?

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I've been to Mexico, but didn't do any of the wild shit people typically do in Mexico. I was young.

 

I would like to go to Japan, though. Everything I hear about it makes me think I'll just fall in love with the culture. I hear it's like living in a video game. Plus they have pretty and young girls eating shit and licking out the asshole of a dog (Not to mention Cockroach Eating Girl). I don't know where they find these ladies, but they are there, apparently. They have professional quality porn comics which people draw themselves and publish, for the sheer joy of it. Movies about giant monsters. Crazy horror movies. So much more. God I love Japan.

When I get there (and that's when, not if), I will either just never come back, or if I do come back, I'm bringin' a wife with me.

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I think Vanhalen sucks. You may very well be a fine guy in real life, and from the tidbits you've shared about your personal life, you probably are, but that doesn't impress me. I'm a fine guy in real life, and I don't suck on the internet. But you do. Balance, man! You have to balance both.

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What do you think of that awesome poster Slayer? And why are you never in the TSM Chatroom?

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What do you think of that awesome poster Slayer? And why are you never in the TSM Chatroom?

 

I think Slayer's a great guy. I am never in the tsm chatroom because honestly I'm not even aware of it. I don't pay attention much, you see. If I am sometime bored, I might stop in.

 

What does it mean to love?

 

You know that feeling when you're in love and then you get dumped and you feel like you'll never get over it and will never love anyone the same way again? I never had that. I mean sure, I've felt really bad, but I knew I was gonna get over it. The part about not loving anyone the same way was true though. Because you shouldn't. That perpetual infatuation you feel with young love is incredibly unhealthy. It fosters dependence. Anytime your happiness is reliant upon someone else, that's bad. Furthermore, you, in turn, neglect yourself, and by extension, render yourself less and less desirable until you get dumped. It's good to have one of those relationships though, so you know what not to do next time.

I have a weakness for stupid whores. I think they're fun. But I've had to come to the conclusion that I ought to at least be open to the possibility of a decent woman. So as I've spent time with girls who are adults, I've found they all want autonomy and hate dependence. It's refreshing. Real love is more like a friendship. Like Cliff and Claire Huxtable. You didn't see them skipping around and weeping over each other, did you? No!

Romeo and Juliet were actually two of the stupidest characters in fiction. All the god damn soap opera bullshit and that crap they put in the movies, girls love that stuff. But it never happens in real life. Girls need to be fucked over a couple times before they figure out how to have a real, healthy relationship. That's terrible. It's all the fault of god damn Hollywood. I mean, it's ok to watch the movie, but don't expect that shit to really happen. It's like porn for women. Porn will screw up a guy's expectations too. It turns out that in real life, girls usually don't like having loads blown in their face. I was just as surprised as you.

 

If you really want to make a girl feel special, either A) Cook her dinner. or B) Get a tattoo of her face. Names can be covered up too easily.

 

I'll close with an anecdote that relates why infatuation is bad. When I was in teenaged infatuation relationship, the girl always said she would kill herself if I ever left her. One time we were on the phone, and we were watching the Nickelodeon Kid's Choice Awards, mostly so she could talk about how stupid it was (she was one of those girls). And Spider-man came out, and she said "That's stupid. Spide-man sucks now." And I said "You know what, you're stupid. Go ahead and kill yourself now because I hate you!" Yeah, I'm a pretty big Spider-man fan. A little bit later, I kind of felt bad, so I called her back to make sure she was alive. When she answered, I yelled "WAAAAAASSSSUUUPPP!" like the beer commercials. She hung up on me. If we had been more mature, none of that would have happened.

 

How much longer do you think we whom have been posting here for about 5 years or so will continue to post?

 

I'm not likely to ever stop. And since we've put in this much time, it's probably a matter of something legitimately eating up all our time. Voluntarily quit? If we were going to, we would have by now. So that varies from person to person. It's just a matter of what happens in your life.

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Do you like children?

I do think kids are cute if they aren't mine, but all that shit (literally and figuratively) you have to deal with when you raise them doesn't sound appealing. It's apparently worth it in the end, but god knows if I'll ever find out. I would be equally unsurprised either way.

 

What about 13 year olds with really nice bodies.. I mean they're still children I guess, but some of them are smoking, aren't they?

 

I'm going to answer this seperately because they're not really children if they have nice bodies. Biologically, sexual maturity is adulthood. As a culture, we have invented the concept of adolescence, and only recently. There is nothing wrong at all, morally or for the record legally, with admiring the body of a 13 year old. I might even go so far as to say it's fine to jerk off to pictures of them. Just don't go public with it, not everyone is as enlightened as me. Sure, because our culture has taken sexually mature women and allowed them to be mentally immature children, we should respect their station in life and not talk to them or approach them in that way, but as slutty as a lot of 13 year olds are... in the words of Ian Malcolm, uh... nature finds a way.

 

Remember, I did fuck a 13 year old once.

 

 

Why have you never been an admin or mod(unless I've missed it), you deserve to be

 

Nope, haven't been. Likely the same reasons Inc never has been. Consensus I would guess is we wouldn't care/laugh in their face. And it's true that I don't view those things as a status symbol, you're actually supposed to do things to help the forum. It's volunteer work. Fuck that. Not much of a status symbol either, we've had some pretty big douches as mods. I suppose I could be the kind of mod Agent is, just lording over the anything goes part of the board, but that job is taken.

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Should rename this thread to Vanhalen asks Milky but whatever :), how did you find out about this board, and were you quiet at first?

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Should rename this thread to Vanhalen asks Milky but whatever smile.gif, how did you find out about this board, and were you quiet at first?

 

The board was found likely through searching for various wrestling things. I don't remember exactly, but it's not an exciting story. I read for a while before I joined, and then I sort of posted my opinions about things without getting noticed, although a handful of people did notice me, I got occasional comments like "Oh yeah, you're that guy from the movies folder. You always say good stuff." The beginning of my true career was a thread in the (I believe at the time it was called) Porn folder about naming your fetishes or something, and Banky and I went back and forth saying the craziest shit we could think of. Banky was already an established poster, and he took a liking to me after that, and that was my cred. It sort of grew from there.

 

Oh, and what is the origin of the Milky Has a Cunt sig idea?

 

There used to be this poster here named Kinetic, and he was very similar to Incandenza. Really, they weren't that similar at all, they just both talked about indie music a lot, and I think they may have switched accounts a couple times because people associated them. (Actually, back then Kotz was considered part of that group and he's really different, I don't know what people were thinking) But anyway, one time Kinetic posted a picture of himself saying either "Matt is a cunt" or "Incandenza is a cunt", I can't remember which name he used. And I said "I'm a bigger cunt than him, I should have that." so I started a thread where I asked someone to do that for me. tekcop responded, but he, for whatever reason, wrote "has" instead of "is".

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