PROMO: On the Road to the White House

[Rob E Dangerously 0]

V/O: "And this week in Road to the White House, we go to the Leon Sharpe campaign's visit to Coconino High School's 12th grade government class"

 

We fade to a classroom where the teacher is talking.

 

Teacher: "And we have a real life Presidential candidate right here to talk to us about voting and issues! Please welcome Leon Sharpe!"

 

Sharpe walks into the room as some of the students applaud

 

Voice in the back of the room: "You promised us Alan Keyes!"

 

Sharpe walks up to the podium to give his speech.

 

"Ok, here's the condensed speech since you all will be able to vote next year. We candidates don't take you kids seriouslu because you don't vote very often. If you vote more often and find some issue to focus on, then you'll get more attention. If i'm elected President, I will lower the drinking age to 18 and decriminalize Marijuana. I will also make sure that you all don't get sent off to some war that you don't want to fight. That's all I can promise you, since none of you know much about economics or social issues"

 

Male Student: "But doesn't Congress have lots of people who oppose what you talk about?"

 

Sharpe: "Look kid, Congress will do what I tell them to do"

 

Male Student: "Isn't Marijuana bad for you?"

 

Sharpe: "Probably, but I don't care."

 

Female Student: "Um, why should we be allowed to drink, we're not that mature"

 

Sharpe: "Look, you'll change your tone when you're downing beer bongs at college"

 

Teacher: "Um, how can these kids get out and vote, can you tell us more"

 

Sharpe: "They can register to vote and not stay at home watching Family Guy on Election Day. Your grandma with the artifical hip can get out and vote. You should do it too."

 

Male Student: "Didn't you say something about strippers on some show?"

 

Sharpe: "Yeah, but i'm not going to overload you kiddies with vices. You can learn about strip clubs over spring break."

 

Teacher: "Well, this isn't really the discussion I was expecting"

 

Sharpe: "You should have known better"

 

Sharpe walks out of the room and we fade to him walking through the parking lot of the school.

 

"Insane Luchador, there is an immigration problem in this country. An insane one, if you will. You see, lots of insane luchadors are jumping fences and taking jobs that Americans supposedly don't want. Such as selling grapes and being an insane luchador. Now, you're from Easton, Pennsylvania. Which means that you're either a white dude, or you're an insane luchador who has been working in the chicken plant for the last several months. In order to fully fund my campaign to spread the message of better strippers, more freedom, more legal booze, and less war, I will need to defeat Insane Luchador and defeat him so badly that other insane luchadors decide to stay in Mexico.

 

Insane Luchador, you may be crazy, but you're not crazy enough to defeat me. I'm Leon Sharpe and I approved this message!"

 

Fade out

[Toxxic 0]

I'm amused.

 

Did Leon Sharpe ever wrestle in the SWF, or was he just SJL? If he was just SJL, I vote he gets put into the New Blood division (hey, remember that?). If he has wrestled in the SWF, I vote he pays Flesher a handsome bribe to let him be put in the New Blood division, so that the voting populace associate 'Sharpe' with 'New Blood'.

[Rob E Dangerously 0]

I think Sharpe was in the SJL, and last wrestled there in 2002.