LANDON MADDIX'S NON-DENOMINATIONAL WINTER FUNTIME EXTRAVAGANZA

[Toxxic 0]

(send all marked matches, promos etc to King Cucaracha)

The Homecoming Tour is coming to a close - we’re not at Chicago yet (that’s the location for the Clusterfuck), but Iowa welcomes the SWF for its Winter Extravaganza! Ashes 2 Ashes proved that returning momentum isn’t always all it’s cracked up to be, as Christian Blackwell and Nathaniel Kibagami both lost, while Scott Pretzler failed to make it to the Dakota Dome at all! Meanwhile Toxxic shows that he’s still got what it takes as he retained the World Title against Tom Flesher… but for how long? And will Michael Alexander’s defence of the New Blood Title and resulting title shot change the set-up at the top of the card? However, more pressing matters concern the World Champion because the Violence Distribution Network defeated Austin Sly and The Fabulous Jakey in explosive form, meaning they get a Tag Title shot tonight! However, there is one other Championship Match taking place…


SWF CRUISERWEIGHT TITLE
Wildchild© vs. ‘Hollywood’ Spike Jenkins
It’s been a long time since the Cruiserweight Title topped the card - the last time was when Wildchild and Scott Pretzler went toe-to-toe for the belt back in 2005 - but that’s too long ago and hey, Wildchild’s always tried to push the division so here’s an early Christmas present for him. The Bahaman Bomber only managed a time-limit draw against overseas sensation Dance Dance Dragon, but pulled off a victory against the significantly larger Christian Blackwell at Ashes 2 Ashes. It’s back to the Cruiserweight Division now for Dub-Cee, against…

…Spike? Yes indeed, Spike Jenkins took out four other cruiserweights at Class Is In Session, then stepped up a weight category to dispatch Nathaniel Kibagami with the Endwell at Ashes 2 Ashes. Jenkins is 2-0 in this latest SWF run; can he keep his momentum going and wrest the Cruiserweight Title from the man who’s held the title more times than any other, or will Wildchild retain the belt that has become synonymous with his name?

Word Limit: 7000
Rules: Cruiserweight - 20 count on the outside, no throwing an opponent over the top rope
Send To: King Cucaracha



Tom Flesher vs. Nathaniel Kibagami
My mouth is watering.

Momentum is a fickle thing. Tom took a loss in a tag match, then beat Johnny Dangerous to get a crack at the World Title, then failed in that World Title shot. The Superior One is doubtless nursing a bruised ego, not to mention a sore head, but can he suck it up (and there’s quite a lot of ‘it’, these days) to get back into winning ways or has Flesher’s tenure at the top of the card finally drawn to a close? Opposite him is the unpredictable, unreliable and downright unsafe River Dragon, who returned in startling form to KO Christian Fury only to be beaten by Spike Jenkins last month. On any given night you might get a washed-up drunken addict or a deadly martial artist with a mean streak and the hardest kicks in the business. Tom Flesher’s likely to run into one of the two, but which? And will it matter either way? It’s amateur wrestling skills combined with some nasty headdrops and a bit of a paunch against Muay Thai and some even nastier headdrops… but a notably weak neck. Which of these slightly flawed warriors will triumph?

Word Limit: 6000
Rules: Standard Singles
Send To: Toxxic



SWF TAG TEAM TITLES
Revolution Zero© (Austin Sly & Toxxic) vs. VDN (Va’aiga & Dace Night)
It was four years ago, but Dace Night and Va’aiga were Tag Champions, and damn good ones. Now back together and their legendary falling-out behind them, they’ve headed after the straps again. Those straps are currently being held by Austin Sly, whom was one-half of the team beaten by the Violence Distribution Network at Ashes 2 Ashes, and Toxxic… who just happens to be someone against whom Dace Night has never managed a victory in any form of competition, whether singles, tag or six-man tag. Will it be 2004 all over again and Dace’s team will fall short, or has the relentless schedule of title matches taken its toll on Toxxic? With Austin Sly doubtless out for revenge and Va’aiga always ready to throw a lariat or three, this should get interesting.

Word Limit: 5000
Rules: Tag. Use the tag ropes.
Send To: King Cucaracha



MANSON vs. Johnny Dangerous
MANSON is rolling on towards MANSONMAS (get your cards in the mail now!) with some serious momentum under his belt. This has not gone unnoticed by Landon Maddix, who despite his previous differences with the Savage Messiah respects in-ring ability when he sees it. MANSON has a chance to add a big name to his tally list here tonight by taking out Johnny Dangerous, a man who has seen his form slump somewhat since losing the World Title at Genesis. A win over MANSON could get him back into the right frame of mind… a win for MANSON will result in favourable treatment down the line when title challengers are being considered…

Word Limit: 4500
Rules: Standard Singles
Send To: Toxxic



IN THE HOUSE OF MARVELLOUS
Michael Alexander takes to the stage to let the world know which champion(s) he’s going after with his New Blood title shot, and why!



CRUISERWEIGHT RULES
Dance Dance Dragon vs. The Fabulous Jakey
Triple D *pose, spit water* has yet to lose a match in the SWF. The mysterious masked man must surely think that there’s still a Cruiserweight Title shot lurking around for him somewhere after Wildchild couldn’t beat him within the allotted timeframe for the match. However, tonight he faces two-time former Cruiserweight Champion The Fabulous Jakey. Will Dragon dance on to victory, or will Jakey have the last laugh? Only time will tell.

Word Limit: 4500
Rules: Cruiserweight - 20 count on the outside, no throwing your opponent over the top rope
Send To: Ace309



Christian Blackwell vs 'The Paladin' Chance Silver
The big Australian suffered a defeat at the hands of Wildchild last show, but given the talent of the Bahaman Bomber that's nothing to be ashamed about. Blackwell gets a chance to work out a few cobwebs this month and prove that his win at Class Is In Session wasn't a fluke by taking on Chance Silver.

Word Limit: 4500
Rules: Standard Singles
Send To: King Cucaracha


Taiga Star vs Olaf Andersen
NEWBIE AHOY! Aaron Starr turned out to be about as impressive as Ultimo Phantasmo (remember him?), but maybe he'll be back with a little more effort at some point... meanwhile we have another Star (one 'r'), this one being Taiga! The first female competitor the federation has had in a couple of years, will she enjoy the success of Annie Onita or just turn out to be another Candice Okimurra (I hope not, for her sake - Tom's active again, after all). Opposing her is the youngest and most athletic of the Four Norsemen, so let Big Battel commence!

Word Limit: 4000
Rules: Standard Singles
Send To: King Cucaracha



JJ Johnson vs. Craig McLennan
JJ Johnson is, shall we say, a little unreliable. He was booked into a ladder match against Luke-O and never showed up, despite the $10,000 on offer. Then he was put in a Submissions Match against Scott Pretzler, for which neither of them turned up. Tonight JJ has another try, this time against Craig McLennan. McLennan got that notable win against Chris Fury a couple of shows ago, but fared badly against Spike Jenkins in the Cruiserweight Multi-Man Match. Can JJ take him down?

Word Limit: 4000
Rules: Standard Singles
Send To: King Cucaracha

*BE WARNED - PRESIDENT RAMU IS ON DUTY TO DESTROY ALL NO-SHOWERS*





NON-RELIGION-SPECIFIC FESTIVE BONUS MATCH
ALL-SHOW BRAWL II
Insane Luchador vs. Christian Fury
Hoo, boy.

See, way waaaaaaaaaaay back in 2004 Insane Luchador had a few matches against Toxxic, one of which was the notorious All-Show Brawl that took place in Philly. It ended up with IL missing a moonsault from the top of the Smarktron - well, he hit the table he was aiming for, but Toxxic was no longer on it - and Toxxic got the pin. So, for a laugh, Landon dragged this stip out to give it a second airing. Insane Luchador seems tailor-made for this match, if he brings his working boots. Fury? Well, here’s hoping he might at least get some pinfalls in this match, even if not the winning one…

Word Limit: 6000
Send To: Toxxic
Rules: The match starts at the start of the show in the parking lot. It is a No-DQ, Falls Count Anywhere match that will progress until one competitor has scored ten (10) pinfalls over the over, or until the end of the show (at which point the competitor in the lead will have won)
Writing Notes: You have your own referee (feel free to assign someone, not one of the regular SWF refs though as they may be used elsewhere. I used the Memphis Eel), and your own cameraman (Boz). The word limit should be split into several segments - one at the start of the show and then others to be placed between other matches as you see fit until you wish to end it. You MAY ask for your match to make a brief appearance on other people’s matches (a quick brawl in one door, through the ringside area and then back out another, for example), but they need to agree it, and obviously if you wish a fall to take place in that time then you’ll need to agree with your opponent what the score should be at that time.

Good luck, and may the Force be with you.

Edited December 7, 2007 by Toxxic