OAOAST Syndicated 2/3-2/4

[Patty O'Green 0]

Brought to you by American Express

Taped: February 2nd 2008

First air date: February 3rd 2008 (check local listings for airings in your area)

Announce team: Tony Schiavone and Jesse "The Body" Ventura

Lead corespondent: Tony Brannigan

 

Highlights from Anglepalooza and especially the Lethal Rumble welcome those of us with nothing better to do at 3 AM in the morning. I personally suggest sleep, but that's just me and the natural biological processes of the human body. Anywhoot, Jesse and Tony opened the in-arena action with a rundown of tonight's card, Vinny Valentine takes on Mad Cappa, Leon Rodez and ThunderKid meet Spanish Fly and Vitamin X, James Riggs is in action, and in the mainevent Team Heyross and The Sooner Bruisers battle The Heavenly Rockers and The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew.

 

***The Disco Duck Vinny Valentine Vs Mad Cappa***

Clips of Mad Cappa's somewhat quick elimination from the Lethal Rumble played during his entrance, causing Tony to note that this is opportunity to make good on his upsetting performance. Valentine emerged from the back with a shopping cart full of crap. Excuse me, high quality disco collectibles. Microphone in tow, Vinny V auctioned off his 70's era treats to a less then receptive fanbase. Some of the items featured in his sale were a replica of The Bee Gee's grammy, two strands of Barry White's chest hair, Steve Rubell's amyl nitrate, and a smashed record from the White Sox's Disco Demolition Night. Disturbingly, Valentine actually got a $1000 bid from Schiavone for a date with one of The Pips. The match? Well, as soon as Valentine entered the ring he was attacked by stomps from Cappa. From there MC continued to control the offensive flow of the match with a variety of suplexes, and DDTs. Valentine, however, managed to put himself on the attack when he distracted the referee with a fake knee injury, which allowed his cousin, Tony Tourette's to lowblow Cappa with a copy of Cheryl Lynn's FUCKING AWESOME Got To Be Real. From there Valentine pounded Cappa out with a brawling based offense consisting mainly of forearms and elbow smashes. Finally Vinny went for his finisher the Night Fever (Alabama Jam)! But Cappa quickly scurried free of Vinny's clutches! Caught by surprise by his foe's escape, Vinny was trapped into a standing head scissors, then lifted onto Cappa's shoulders. To the fans joy and amazement, Cappa powerbombed Vinny over the ropes, and right into his shopping cart of useless shit.....excuse me disco collectibles. Needless to say Vinny was unable to meet the referee's ten count.

 

Winner: Mad Cappa, via countout

 

On the interview podium Tony Brannigan was set to do an interview with Ned Blanchard. However, Ned never actually showed up at the podium, instead his image was broadcast on the wall mounted video screen on the stage's backdrop. He claimed that given his past history with Brannigan, that he could not ensure his safety, and thus refused an appearance. Brannigan said that if he was going to kick Ned's ass, he would've done it by now, but went on with the interview anyway. The topic was Ned's thoughts on Krista's illegitimate child. Given that Ned's the father of Krista's youngest, Maya, we might expect him to be concerned for her welfare and emotional wellbeing after the shocking revelation that she has a sibling. Uh, wrong. Ned seemed concerned only figuring out who was the better lay he or the other baby's daddy. The Handsome Hustler got down on his hands and knees pleaded for Krista to say he was. We also learned the disturbing fact that Krista made him pretend to be either Janet from Three's Company or Daphne from Frasier when they were in bed. The last one especially odd, because Ned can't really do British.

 

We saw footage from earlier in the day where Spanish Fly claimed that he's Krista's son to various backstage staff. This drew the attention of a nearby Leon, who reminded Fly that he's about a foot shorter then the tall blond. A chuckling Rodez then proceeded to mock an incredibly annoyed and flustered Fly with numerous short jokes. The only reason he stopped his good natured taunting is due to Vitamin X sneaking behind him and whacking him with a chair. Before they could do serious damage to the Silky Smooth One, Rodez' partner for the day, ThunderKid, scattered the duo with his reckless swinging of a lead pipe.

 

***Silky Smooth Leon Rodez and ThunderKid Vs Vitamin X and Spanish Fly***

No sooner then two seconds after the Corporation representatives hit the ring did the match erupt into a wild free for all brawl. Thankfully for X, who was taking quite the licking from TK, referee Charles Robinson was able to settle the group down long enough to allow Leon to begin the match against Fly. Despite their smallish sizes, the two resumed a heated brawl, with Rodez using his strength advantage to pound out his Latin rival. Fly succeeded in shutting down Leon's attack with a boot to the gut and a backflip dropkick. The smallest wrestler on the roster then took position in the driver's seat, using agile lucha inspired moves to keep Rodez down. However, Leon was able to offer bouts of offense here and there, including hitting the crowd pleasing It's Da Boom! (Blue Thunder Bomb) Eventually the high flying foes wore each other down to the point where they had no choice but to tag in their partners. ThunderKid quickly overwhelmed X with a series of lariats, then proceeded to demolish him with moves designed to target the legs. After weakening X with a press slam followed by a shooting star press, Kid decided to tag in Leon. But that's where things began to go down hill, as when Leon spun across the ring for The Shack Attack rolling clothesline, Fly pushed him off course with a springboard swanton bomb. From there it was all Corporation; the duo worked over their foe with high impact moves designed to target both back and shoulders.

 

There were several moments where it appeared that Leon wouldn't be able to keep fighting, but each time he continued his valiant war against Popick's lackeys. His resiliency would pay off when he blasted Fly with the Mama Said Knock You Out four jab combo! On his last legs he made a desperate tag to ThunderKid, who proceeded to clean house on Fly and The X-Man with lariats and dropkicks. But, the Corporation members were able to subdue Kid's assault with a double bulldog (lol i wrote bulldong 1st!), followed by some rapid and furious striking. However, The Grand Rapids Golden Child even upped the odds when he chucked X into the ring posts. Fly's attempt to gain revenge for his partner's quick dismissal was an abysmal failure as Le-Ro dropped him with a double leg takedown and promptly submitted him with a Liontamer.

 

Winner:Leon Rodez and ThunderKid via submission.

 

The HeldDOWN~! recap played, focusing on Landon's challenge to Todd Cortez and the unique stipulation, Popick's celebration, Moneymaker's continued efforts to humiliate Krista, Alix's E!News special, Rolling Stone photoshoot, and Krista's post shoot confrontation, Zack Malibu and Bo's brawl, Ander...ya know what just read the show okay? Read the fuckin show. Shit.

***James Riggs Vs Blake Hamilton***

Before the bout even began, James Riggs derided it as an uninteresting lesson in worthlessness, claiming that it was unfit to be entertainment for even serial killers on deathrow. Thus in order to lend some excitement to an otherwise banal affair, he offered young Hamilton a deal. If Blake could claim victory, Riggs would give him $500 of his own money. Considering that Hamilton probably had to pay 500 bucks to work the show, he accepted the deal with enthusiasm afire. Unfortunately his shoddy wrestling skills didn't set the arena afire, or even muster anything more then a knife edge chop. Riggs effortlessly beat him in thirty seconds, deploying a rolling koppu kick and a crossface chicken wing to spell disaster for Hamilton.

 

Winner:James Riggs, via submission.

 

A brief hype video for Anglemania played in which Zack Malibu talked up the importance of performing at the historic event, and said anyone who performs at an Anglemania is truly privileged. I told you it was brief!

 

Backstage the team of Team Heyross and The Sooner Bruisers attempted to craft a semi-decent strategy for their mainevent match against The Wrecking Crew and The Heavenly Rockers. But the egos of Big Frank and Quentin Benjamin were impossible obstacles to overcome, and their session degenerated into a feisty argument that ended with referees and road agents having to come between them before violence ensued. The opposing lockeroom, however, was a testament to harmonious brotherhood, as the four men put aside their past differences to join spiritual guide Abdullah Abir Nerdly in joyful prayer and heartfelt thanksgiving.

 

NEXT WEEK ON HELDDOWN~!

The Conference Semi Finals Continue...

MWC: Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew vs. Sooner Bruisers

LI: The Heavenly Rockers vs. Team Heyross

 

***Team Heyross and The Sooner Bruisers Vs The Heavenly Rockers and The Mardi Gras Homewrecking Creww/Holly and Abdullah Abir Nerdy***

Right from the get-go it was fairly evident that The Heyross/Bruisers squad was still nowhere close to occupying the same page. It took a stunning amount of time for them to even decide who would begin the mainevent bout. A resolution only came when Rico jumped Uber, earning him the role as starter for his team. Uber would quickly recover from the shock attack to easily outmaneuver the Brazilian through several mat wrestling sequences. De Janeiro would then bring in Synth to try and combat Uber's impressive mixture of power and technique, but the Synthanator wasn't up to task of battling Uber's amateur wrestling skills. Soul, however, was able to achieve some success, battling past Uber's ground-based attacks with a plethora of fancy aerial kicks. Logan fared even better with a variety of neckbreakers, but wasn't able to capitalize on the damage he was building thanks to QB making a blind tag. Mann and Benjamin played an elusive game of cat and mouse with Benjamin attempting to overwhelm Logan with various submission efforts, and Logan seeking a homerun with a Percussion DDT. Logan's cagey performance didn't quite hold up against Big Frank, though, and the man of tomorrow brutally battered his old archival. Logan's teammates were equally as ineffective against BFB, being launched across the ring by a steady procession of belly to belly suplexs and lariats. Despite his path of destruction, BFB couldn't secure a pinfall, and finally had to acquiesce to Moss' request for a tag. Moss held his own with Logan and then Soul, but fell prey to a siderussian leg sweep spinning back kick combo from Synth and The Jive Soul Bro. That plunged him deep into an extended beating from his four opponents, who took turns working over his neck. However Moss countered a Mustache Ride from Rico into a DDT, and was able to capitalize on that in order to tag Benjamin into the affair. From there, control abandoned referee Billy Silverman's grasp, as all eight men had their time in the ring.

 

The Rocker/Wrecking Crew unit seemed to have the slight edge on their foes, with Logan taking Moss out with a Percussion DDT, and Soul chucking Uber over the ropes and finishing the Psycho Gremlin (and himself) off with a moonsault press. But, a Soonerline from BFB took Logan out of the picture, and soon Rico met the same fate, leaving only Synth behind for his team. Desperate to aid his religious disciple, Abdullah tossed the Koran into the ring. But, Abby's no Eli Manning, and Frank effortlessly intercepted the pass. Unfortunately Frank is no Ryan Howard, and his attempt to blast Synth to Mecca went catastrophically awry when he missed the rocker and KO'ed Benjamin! Esizer took quick advantage of Frank's failings, booting him in the gut and drilling him with a percussion DDT onto the holy scriptures. With Holly and Abdullah celebrating in the background, Synth picked up an easy pinfall.

 

Winner: The Heavenly Rockers and Mardi Gras Homewrecking Crew via pinfall

 

The show ended with the victorious party celebrating around the Koran in the ring, and the losers engaged in bitter argument outside of it.

Edited February 4, 2008 by Patty O'Green