Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 We find ourselves opening backstage in the office of OAOAST President, AngleSault. ANGLESAULT Good evening and thank you joining us here from San Diego, just a week removed from one of the greatest nights in the history of this sport, AngleMania VII. We thank all our great fans for joining us and making it such a monumental event. But that was then and now, the OAOAST will move on. ANGLESAULT Over the next few weeks, the OAOAST will be embarking on a tour of some of Europe's biggest cities, before returning to the US the week of School's Out. And at that very Pay Per View, the new OAOAST World Heavyweight Champion Tha Puerto Rican will make his first big-show defence. ANGLESAULT To determine the new number one contender, there will be an eight-man single elimination tournament, held over our events in Paris, Barcelona and finally Glasgow, Scotland. The winner will go on to School's Out to face PRL for the World Title. And what's more, it will be an opportunity similar to that which PRL took at AngleMania, as the eight participants are all competitors who have never been World Champion before. It's the ultimate opportunity for one rising star in the OAOAST. The eight men involved will be... one third of the 6-Man Tag Team Champions, Nathaniel Black... Jamie O'Hara... Spanish Fly... "The Urban Legend" Todd Cortez... The Mad Cappa... the winner of the 2008 Lethal Rumble, The Cuban Wall... Christian Wright... and "Silky Smooth" Leon Rodez. The first round of matches will take place in Paris, France in two weeks time and we hope you'll all join us on TSM. Thank you. THE FOLLOWING PROGRAM IS INTENDED FOR MATURE AUDIENCES ONLY PRESENTED IN HD Highlights from this past weeks Anglemania are displayed instead of the usual introductory video. The majority of the highlights celebrate the victors, fitting images for our theme song of Ultimate Victory, which I guess is due to be changed soon. As the video closes out with an overhead shot, we dissolve into our logo... We're taken into the arena where the sounds of the roaring crowd fills our ears. However what fills our eyesight is the announce team of Double C, stationed at sofa central and clad in their usual orange polos and khaki pants. COLE Folks, Anglemania is in the books! What a fantastic show that was, in front of a record setting crowd in Los Angeles, California! Michael Cole and Johnathan Coachman, here in San Diego for our big post Anglemania blowout! And we've already started it off huge with a announcement from Anglesault, as our international tour will be the sight of a huge tournament to determine the number one contender for School's Out! But, we don't want to get ahead of ourselves, because there's still lots to happen here tonight. Let's kick things off with some one on one action! *WHIIIR!* *WHIIIR!* "Doctor, doctor, give me the news I've got a bad case of lovin' you No pill's gonna cure my ill I've got a bad case of lovin' you" The Doctors Of Love are in as we return to San Diego, Pigley and Anderson charging out and driving the fans wild with their labcoat striptease routine. Only in the OAOAST! Only Pigley actually strips of the coat however, as it's singles action for him tonight. BUFFER The following contest is set for one fall, with a twenty minute time-limit. Introducing first, accompanied by his colleague and tag team partner, Dr. Max Anderson. From Chicago, Illinois... he weighs two hundred, ten pounds... the host of "The Love Line", every Wednesday night at 7PM on local Chicago radio... "THE LOVE DOCTOR"... SSTTEEEEEEEEVVVEEEEEEEENN... PPIIIIIIIGGLLLLLLLEEEEEEYYYYYYYY!!!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" COLE The Love Doctors have been on a good run as of late. A victory tonight, albeit in singles action, might put them in line for a 6-Man Tag Team Title shot down the line. COACH With who? EMT Tim? Why waste their time? In slide The Docs, Anderson hyping his tag team partner up as "The Church Of Hot Addiction" fires up. With a beaming smile on his face, out heads James Blonde, flanked as ever by the crazed looking Faqu. Gone is the faux fur coat, oh noez! Blonde's new trend to be setting is a black hooded jacket, short sleeved on the left side and totally cut open down the seam on the right. Pulling his newly regained OAOAST 6-Man Tag Team Title belt from the open half of his jacket, Blonde raises it over his head as he walks to the ring, lording it over everybody in San Diego. BUFFER And his opponent is accompanied to the ring by "The Samoan Wrecking Ball", FAQU! He hails from Vancouver, British Columbia and weighs two hundred and eight pounds... one third of the NEW OAOAST World 6-Man Tag Team Champions! Representing Cucaracha Internacional... "THE TRENDSETTER"... JJJAAAAAAAAAMMMEEEEESSSSSSS... BBLLLLLOOOOOOOOONNDDEEEEEEEEE!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Blonde enters the ring and ditches his new jacket, showing off... yes, new ring attire as well. He really IS The Trendsetter! Red 3/4 length pants, with the Canadian flag on the right hip, 'BLONDE' in Japanese scripture down the left leg in white and black elastic ties at the bottom of both legs are topped off with a pair of gold wrestling shoes with red socks. COACH (hypnotically) Must... buy... gold shoes. Handing over his title belt, Blonde convinces Faqu to take up a position on the outside instead of rushing The Docs as he looks about to do. Once Faqu is in position Blonde then turns to Pigley, fluffing up his hair with an arrogant smile on his face. COLE Both of these men, veterans of the HI-YAH promotion not so long ago, heavily influenced by their time in Japan as I'm sure we'll see from their in-ring styles. *DINGDINGDING!* Feeling pretty good about things, Blonde is ready to go and locks up with Pigley with a big smile on his face. That smile soon disappears after an armdrag though. Pigley then takes him over a second time with an armdrag. And a third, after which Blonde scrambles to the ropes to force the Doc to back off. COLE A little bit of a wake-up call for James Blonde right there. Wiping the hair from his face, Blonde wonders aloud what the hell just happened before he picks himself up. The two go to lock-up again, but JB is a step ahead this time, sweeping out the legs and covering... 1... ...quick kickout by Pigley, who then sweeps the legs on Blonde... 1... ...another quick kickout, Blonde going for the sweep again but finding the well empty on this occasion. Pigley hurdles it, blocks a back elbow and pulls Blonde over into the La Majistral cradle... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Man, Blonde has not gotten out of first gear. Blonde quickly scurries back to the ropes to break up the moment of the good Doctor, who takes the opportunity to fire up the crowd in San Diego. Looking mightly frustrated, The Trendsetter takes his time and paces around trying to get his head back into the game. Steven is happy to wait, until Blonde slaps his hand and offers up a test of strength. Locking hands, Pigley cautiously goes for the second hand... before pulling out and cracking Blonde in the chest with an open hand! Running up the ropes, Pigley goes up over Blonde's head, keeping hold of the arm and pulling him over by the wrist. Sliding to his feet, Blonde quickly sidesteps Pigley. But the Doctor improvises, coming off the second rope and snaring the arm for another armdrag variation. COLE Blonde's been turned inside out so many times, it may take a Doctor to untie him by the time this match is over! Dis-orientated, Blonde falls against the ropes and Pigley is right after him. Irish whip sends Blonde off, leapfrogged by Pigley on the rebound. Dr. Pigley then makes the mistake of ducking his head though, allowing Blonde to drop an elbow to the back of the head. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COLE Telegraphed that one though. COACH That's the problem with the Love Doctors... well, one of many. They're quick, they're exciting, but they get caught up in the moment and they make dumbass mistakes like that. That's why health insurance is so pricey. Blonde tries to hide his shakiness with a cocky smile as he picks Pigley back up. He drops him back down with a quick back suplex, then makes the cover... 1... 2... No! Sitting Pigley up, Blonde delivers a dropkick to the back of the head before trying his luck again... 1... 2... No! COACH You know, I've always been a big fan of my boy JB... COLE Really? COACH Of course! But I gotta say, since Landon Maddix took Internationally Known under his wing, he's improved so much it's untrue. I mean, he's got the looks, the style, the ability, everything it takes to be the next Landon Maddix. COLE Oh brother! Dragging Pigley behind him, into the corner goes Blonde. He throws the Doctor face-first into the turnbuckle, before turning him around and spitting on his hand, setting up a short knifedge chop. Blonde then jogs across to the opposite corner. Giving the thumbs up to Faqu, Blonde charges at Pigley... but Pigley tumbles out of the way! Blonde hits the turnbuckles chest first and staggers backwards, into the Crucifix Bomb!! 1... 2... NO! COLE Oh, only two! Tremendous snap on that manoeuvre. Back to his feet, a groggy swing and a miss from Blonde leaves him open for an atomic drop. Off the ropes, Pigley follows up with a front dropkick and JB is rolled head over heels, right out of the ring. Seeing the opportunity to fly, Dr. Pigley rallies the crowd behind while the referee makes sure Faqu stays out of the action. Pigley then hits the ropes, full head of steam as he ducks through... ...INTO A KNEE TO THE HEAD!! "OOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH So much for the flying doctor gags! COLE Great presence of mind from James Blonde to pull himself back up and block that suicide dive. With Pigley down, Blonde heads up to the top rope and loads up the fist, coming off with the Marty Jannetty Fistdrop right to the forehead! Cover... 1... 2... NO! Picking Pigley back up, Blonde signals for the end as he sets up a suplex. Up and over floats Dr. Pigley however, landing behind and driving JB into the turnbuckles looking for an O'Connor roll. Blonde tries to block it by grabbing onto the ropes, but ends up grabbing the top turnbuckle pad and pulling it clean off as he's taken down... 1... 2... No! Avoiding a collision with the exposed turnbuckle, Pigley climbs to the middle rope and dives, pulling the ducking Blonde down with a sunset flip... 1... 2... Kickout! COLE Blonde really having some trouble shaking off the AngleMania hangover so far tonight. COACH Well what do you expect? He's in there with a guy who's sole AngleMania contribution was that publicity drive over in West Hollywood that you arranged with Los Diablos, so he's fresh, that's an unfair advantage if you ask me! Luckily for Blonde he manages to cut Pigley off with a quick forearm to the stomach and give himself chance to catch his breath. Blonde nails Pigley in the side of the head with a forearm. And another, before looking for an irish whip. Reversal by Pigley, who again ducks his head too early and almost gets caught with the Guilt Trip, just managing to stand up and counter in time. Blonde flips backwards and lands on his feet, but misses with a clothesline and takes another dropkick that knocks him into the corner. COLE Dropkick and... wait a minute. What is this idiot doing out here again!? "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" "This idiot" would be none other than BIFF ATLAS, who has hit the ring. Pigley stomps away on Blonde, unaware of Biff's entrance behind him, as is the referee. Sliding into the ring, Biff totally ignores the action going on though, instead pulling a roll of bright yellow "CAUTION" tape from under his shirt and wrapping it around the ropes in the corner with the exposed turnbuckle! COACH Oh, thank goodness. Pigley was gonna whip Blonde into that turnbuckle and you know it, but luckily Biff Atlas had his eye on this match and saw the potential hazard this moron referee didn't. COLE What the hell business is this of Biff Atlas's!? What is he, the safety inspector now!? COACH He's doing a better job than the safety inspector we've got at the moment. COLE I'm not sure we even have one right now. COACH Exactly! Biff continues to cordone off the one corner of the ring, which isn't appreciated by Dr. Max Anderson. Anderson climbs onto the apron to question what the hell Biff's doing. But Biff doesn't listen to a word he's saying, too busy warning Anderson that the apron is only about 10 inches in length and not a safe position to view the match from. Referee Mike Chioda eventually spots all this and tries to get Biff out of the ring, to his lengthy complaints. COLE I swear, Biff Atlas isn't all there in the head. COACH Hey, lay off him, the guy had a traumatic incident a couple of weeks back and he's trying to make sure it doesn't happen to anyone else. As Chioda tries to get rid of Atlas and/or Anderson meanwhile, Pigley ducks a shot from Blonde and has him set up for the TIME OF DEATH... ...but gets struck in the back by FAQU!! Pigley drops Blonde and gets spun around by The Samoan, who double underhooks the arms AND DROPS PIGLEY ON HIS HEAD WITH DEATH BY SAMOAN!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Wait a minute! The referee didn't see it, this is ridiculous! COACH Go tell Faqu that. Please, I ain't kidding, I wanna see you get smushed. No offence. With Pigley out, Blonde ushers Faqu out of the ring before the referee can suspect anything untoward. Biff is finally satisfied with the safety of the ring and is gotten out by Chioda, where he continues his arguement on the floor with Anderson. Meanwhile, Blonde drags Pigley into the centre of the ring. Off the ropes, he vaults to the middle rope, coming back with the Lionsault!! Hook of the leg, ref none the wiser, Anderson neither... COACH What a move! I can't see Pigley getting up after that. 1... 2... 3!!! COLE Dr. Max, with no idea what just transpired. *DINGDINGDING!* BUFFER Your winner of the match... "THE TRENDSETTER"... JAMES BBLLLLOOOOOONNDDEEEEE!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Sliding into the ring, Anderson looks confused since the last he saw his tag team partner was on the offensive. Blonde heads out the other way and pats Faqu on the back for a job well done, taking back his 6-Man Tag Title and pointing Faqu towards the back as he stares into the ring at The Love Doctors. COLE Opportunistic, that's about the best I can say about James Blonde after that. Passed in the aisle by Blonde and Faqu, Biff backs slowly up the ramp, looking quite worried that Dr. Pigley might have hurt his neck. What should be worrying him is the look from Dr. Max Anderson now he knows what happened. COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 (edited) COLE Awesome show right now, but let's go to something taped earlier this week at the OAOAST Studios, as we're going to go to it now, a sit-down interview hosted by Josh Matthews with a returning star... (Cut to one-shot of Matthews, sitting on an interview set) JOSH November of 2003, my guest at this time made his name as a comedy act. He quickly developed into one of the most talented in-ring competitors and skilled technicians that this company has ever seen. For over the past year, his life has been a roller coaster ride with...well, more lows than highs. But, he's back with a new fire and determination. (camera zooms out to two-shot) Let me welcome back to the OAOAST...Sly Sommers. SLY (wearing suit and hair slicked back) Thanks, bro. It's weird, full-circle stuff man...I started with you back then and we're here now. JOSH Don't mention it. Now, the last OAOAST fans saw of you, you were involved in a deal that involved your little brother and Zack Malibu that ended abruptly in one of the most emotional free-TV matches in OAOAST history, when your trainer Zack Malibu beat you one-two-three in the middle of the ring. After the match, with not a dry eye in the house, you & Malibu made amends...or so we thought. SLY Yeah...first off, that was my real little brother, John. I tried getting him into the business, but he didn't like what he saw it had done to me and got out while he could, which explains that whole abrupt end to his storyline. Now, the Malibu thing...it's no secret: I was Zack's prized student and he & I never saw eye-to-eye until that moment. I finally had earned his trust and respect. I had just gotten out of a stint at rehab to get myself off of coke; my head hadn't been on straight in a while. I guess I can kinda "shoot", as we call it in the business, here, but the plan after that match was for me to become a manager since my neck had been bothering me going into that match and I really screwed it up when Malibu spun me around on the finish to swing me into the superkick. *clip of that finish shown in slow motion* SLY Around that time, I started using prescription meds to deal with that pain. I also like to drink. Jack Daniels is the booze of choice, as I showed in the promo the night before the Malibu match. I started combining the two and...well, I became a mess. To his credit, Malibu paid to immediately get me into rehab. However, I completely (bleep)ed that over and got kicked out in about...I want to say, a week. I wasted my time, I wasted their time, and most importantly, I wasted the respect and trust of the man I had worked so hard to earn his acknoledgement, on top of his money that he lost since there was no refund. I went right back to the booze and pills. Hell, I don't remember all of last fall. My wake-up call came on Thanksgiving night. I was eating dinner with the family and I was so ridiculous in my addiction that I had my percs and my Jack sitting right next to the turkey legs and mashed potatoes. Anyway, I turn my head because I'm all spaced out and get distracted by shiny lights, and when I turn around, the entire family's in tears and...(starts holding back tears)...my little 3-year-old baby niece Beth had gotten into my stuff and taken percosets. They had to pump her stomach...Josh, I almost killed her! (starts crying) JOSH Can we...can we stop rolling for a few minutes? (dissolve) JOSH We're back here...we've given Sly a few minutes to compose himself...now, after the wake-up call, what happened? SLY (breathes heavy) From that point, I dedicated myself to getting myself off of that crap and back into the gym, working out twice as hard because being a competitor in the OAOAST is what has made me happiest in life, despite the paranoia and problems with Zack. I graduated rehab on February 1st and they were awesome enough to let me have supervised day trips to the gym every day after the first two weeks. Honestly, I'm probably in the best shape I've ever been in. I'm ripped as I've ever been, I'm up to about 210 pounds...the only problem is that my neck's still killing me. Doctor says that I can continue wrestling without surgery, but I screw up really bad once and I could risk retirement for good. JOSH Okay, now explain this whole deal a few weeks ago with the mask and GENSHOU... SLY (laughs) Okay, I had approached the OAOAST about coming back and they, reasonably, were in doubt. I was a screw-up druggie who had screwed this company over multiple times. I could have been THE top guy at one point. Now I was a low-life recovering pillhead, begging for a hand to help pull me out of the gutter. The OAOAST higher-ups gave me an opportunity to come back as a manger for this kid from HI-YAH who HI-YAH wanted to come to America to learn how to perform with more of a character. I was gonna unmask eventually and team with him if I kept my head on straight. JOSH Now, why didn't that happen? SLY First off, I cut that promo about killing and raping people...the TV folks didn't like that too much. (laughs) But, they only really warned me about going too far. The real breaking point was GENSHOU more or less going nuts. He was a stranger in a strange land and no one had really helped him in adjusting to American culture...no one here could even communicate with him in his native tongue, and we didn't know Japanese. So, he had to go back. Don't ask me to explain that bullcrap with the huge Russian...that was some rushed-together thing with a guy who got fired as soon as he got the push. JOSH Fair enough...now, you've had this fall from grace lately and one thing really sticks out: where has Zack Malibu been? SLY Backtracking to me dropping out of rehab...I said I had lost his trust. He had called me right after and asked me to explain myself. I was so hopped up on stuff that I couldn't tie a sentence together. Last I know, he was telling people he wanted nothing to do with me; I had taken advantage of him for the last time. JOSH Why are you coming back to the ring now? SLY Straight up, the OAOAST management think I've proven that I'm drug-free and my head is on straight. I'm in the best shape of my life, I've been blowing through dudes in the training school I've been at...I think I'm ready to make an impact on this company again. More importantly though, I'm coming back for the 10 pounds of gold...I want that World Title worse than anything ever. I want to become one of the few and the proud to hold it. I want to be known as the best at my profession in the entire world at one point in time; something no one can ever take away from me. In my bedroom, right next to my mirror, I have a picture of the ending to the best match of my career ever. The ending to that sixty-minute draw on September 16, 2004. I had her in the cravate. She left her head open in her hold, and I locked my hold in. I could FEEL that belt on my waist. It was RIGHT THERE....and then the bell rang. The time limit had expired and so did my hopes of ever being World Champion...until now. Now I have the chance to come back, clean my slate, and become the top man in the sport! I will be there in the building next week and I will begin to become the man I was before, and build a dynasty upon that! JOSH Now, we're gonna end this thing with a bit of name association. I'll list off some of the top guys in this company now and you give your opinions on them. First, Tha Puerto Rican. SLY Um...well, I've said my piece on him before. Dude obviously doesn't know how to be himself. But honestly, outside of that name, I can't really insult him. He's THE man here right now. It takes a special type of competitor to be the best at anything, especially in a shark tank like the OAOAST. But I'm warning you bro, I'm going to work my way up there, and when I do, cling onto that thing tight, because I'm going to take it from you. JOSH Leon Rodez. SLY Dude, I love him! Like, the guy's got personality, the guy is a great athlete, he's awesome to watch...dude's a superstar waiting for someone in power to realize that and give him that final shove into the main event scene. One of these days, I'd love to be in the ring with him in some way. Two thumbs up. JOSH James Cone, Phoenix. SLY I think the dude has the physical tools. He's got great pain tolerance, some smart moves, he can carry out strategy in the ring great...he just doesn't have that fire, that intensity you need to be a top guy here. He's a great midcarder...dude just doesn't have it, bro. JOSH Bohemoth. SLY Dude's going down the wrong path. I'm the perfect example of why you don't wrong Zack Malibu. I tried that stuff and I was left at the bottom of the ladder, bro. I'm pleading with you man, don't make the same mistake I did; do what you can to make things right with him. JOSH Finally...Zack Malibu. SLY All I can add to what I said is, when I show up next week, on top of getting myself back into World Title contention, I'm going to start doing whatever I can to make things right with him. Zack...(tear streaming down Sly's face)...I'm sorry, man. You tried what you could with me and I threw it away. I...I can't even put into words how big the opportunity you gave me last year to get my life together after all the mud-slinging I did towards your way. You didn't HAVE to help me...you chose to, out of the goodness of your heart. I screwed up. Next week, I start trying to right a wrong. I'm sorry... (Sly buries his head in his hands, fade to black) Backstage, the much of the roster is crowded around a big monitor, watching the interview feed. Phoenix is there, and appears none too happy about Sly's comments. He shakes his head and motions for Widow - they leave. COMMERCIAL COLE AngleMania certainly lived up to the expectations and the hype and if you weren't with us live... well, I really don't know what to tell you. You missed one of the greatest events in OAOAST history and nothing could possibly have been more important. But, if you did miss it, replays will be airing this Sunday and into the beginning of next week. Check your local pay per view listings for more information on how to relive the magic of AngleMania VII. *BbwWbAhmotherfuckerLlIiiBbbEErRrAATtTeeyYyOUUurRrMmmMmMiIInNnDddDd!!* "YYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!" ("BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!") COLE And speaking of AngleMania, here comes a man who picked up the biggest victory of his life! Marching out, Bohemoth is met largely by the cheers of his fans but with a surprising amount of boos mixed in from some sections in San Diego. Wearing a crisp white suit and his orange-tinted sunglasses, Bohemoth looks every inch the star as he walks to the ring with very little reaction to the boos or the cheers. Bo jogs up the ring steps and enters the ring, scaling the turnbuckles and raising his arms overhead... to another slightly mixed reaction. COLE Bohemoth came out on top in one of the finest matches in AngleMania history in my opinion, against Zack Malibu, this past Sunday night. And even if you did see it live, it's worth catching the replay just for another viewing. They left it ALL that ring at AngleMania VII! COACH Yeah, but what everyone's talking about is how Bohemoth left the ring, namely without shaking the hand of Zack Malibu. COLE Well Bohemoth, perhaps with an explanation for us here tonight. "BO - HE - MOTH!" "BO - HE - MOTH!" "BO - HE - MOTH!" "BO - HE - MOTH!" Bo holds his hand up and calls for some quiet, the cheers dying out a little before the boos do which seems to get his attention. He just chuckles a little under breath at them though. BOHEMOTH Man, I guess I should have expected that, huh? You know, last Sunday night, I went into the Los Angeles Memorial Coliseum as the underdog. That's not something I'm used to, being 6-7, 285 as I am. Zack Malibu has got a hell of a record at AngleMania. And I knew I'd be in for the match of my life to keep up with him and I'll be damned if that isn't exactly what happened. Me and Zack, we tore each other apart. And in the end, I managed to put him down for the 1, 2, 3 and have my hand raised in victory in front of 90 something thousand people! "YYYEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHH!" ("BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!") BOHEMOTH But you see, unfortunately, that's not where it ended between me and Zack. Bo shakes his head. BOHEMOTH After the fight of my life, I looked out into those 90 something thousand and they were up cheering for me. I gotta tell you, it felt great. Then, I see a couple of fans looking behind me. And more and more, looking past me. So I get down, turn around and I see Zack Malibu back up and extending his hand to me. No wonder they weren't looking at me anymore. Bohemoth removes his orange-tinted sunglasses, placing them in the front pocket of his jacket. BOHEMOTH All week, I've heard one question from every fan, every cab driver, every baggage handler at the airport, every hotel receptionist. That one question wasn't "How did it feel to win at AngleMania, Bo?" No, it was "Why didn't you shake Zack Malibu's hand, Bo?" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" "ZACK!" BOHEMOTH All I've heard is Zack, Zack, Zack. For one brief moment at AngleMania, I was on top. We went out, we had a great, fairly fought match and I came out on top. Now, suddenly, I'M the bad guy and all anybody wants to do is sympathise with Malibu. You wanna know why I didn't shake Zack Malibu's hand? Well, why should I? That was MY moment. AngleMania VII should have gone down as the night that the Bohemoth was finally unleashed on the OAOAST. I didn't want my AngleMania to be remembered for a HANDSHAKE! But, ya see, Zack Malibu did. Rather than have people remember the fact he got beat, he'd rather you all remember that he was the 'bigger man' to offer his hand to me. Bohemoth scowls a little, as the reaction in the crowd is hard to gauge. BOHEMOTH See, the fact is, I didn't want Zack to steal my moment. People wanna say that I disrespected him? So be it. But the way I see it, HE disrespected ME by not getting the hell out of the ring and giving me my moment. So if anyone's the 'bad gu... .:CUE: "Getting Away With Murder", Papa Roach:. "YYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Uh-oh! COACH Oh great! Here comes Zack, to steal another moment. Looking more than a little offended at what he's heard out of Bohemoth, Zack Malibu storms to the ring ready to tell his side of the story. Zack slides in and marches right past Bohemoth, giving him the stink-eye as he passes. Grabbing his own microphone, Zack then whips around and instantly sticks the finger in the face, drawing some "ooohs" from the fans. ZACK First of all, let's cut the crap of pinning the blame on me here, because you can ask anyone, I'm not that guy! Not in the slightest! Zack paces around a little, wiping a hand across his face. ZACK See, I'm not angry. I'm DISAPPOINTED. I'm disappointed in you Bo. We've been going at it, back and forth since November now and I really thought AngleMania was going to be the end of it. We'd finally get to settle it in the ring, one on one. That's exactly what we did and I'm man enough to admit you beat me. But then you went and pissed it all away but snubbing my handshake. You can say different, but me offering my hand wasn't one of those 'mind-games' that we've been playing with each other these past few months. It was what it was. Respect. Talk about your 'AngleMania moment'. Say what you want, YOU tarnished that moment, by not showing me the respect... BOHEMOTH NO! NO NO! You listen Zack, that's the point. AngleMania shouldn't have been ABOUT YOU! Cut off, Zack stares up at Bohemoth. BOHEMOTH You talk about respect, on and on. But you know deep down that I respect you and everything you've accomplished, way before we ever stepped into that ring in Los Angeles. AngleMania wasn't about 'earning' your handshake. Believe it or not, that 'tremendous honour' doesn't mean all that much to me. It was about earning the victory over you. And I did that. If you wanted to show me this respect, you could have done it in the back, tonight. Unless it wasn't really about respect and it was about you, as usu... ZACK HEY! You know what, you're right. Maybe it isn't about respect anymore. Maybe, now, it's just about you and me! Zack takes a step closer to Bohemoth and it threatens to break down for a second. ZACK Since you didn't want my respect at AngleMania... well, I guess now you've got my attention instead. So, maybe if I can't get your respect, maybe I'll have to BEAT it out of you!! "OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Oh my! Bohemoth glares back at Zack for what seems like an eternity but is only really a few seconds, before he lifts his microphone back up to his mouth. BOHEMOTH You know, I don't know what makes you think you could do that, seeing as you couldn't even manage it at 'your event'... "OOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHH!" BOHEMOTH ...but, you're more than welcome to TRY, anytime! COLE Oh man, I think we've just had a challenge laid out right here! Zack and Bohemoth continue to stare each other down with the microphones now down at the sides and the words now exchanged between them and them alone. The San Diego crowd do their best to egg the two men on to settle their differences right now. But it looks like it's just the words being exchanged for now though, as we fade off to commercial. *COMMERCIAL BREAK* Edited April 5, 2008 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 Backstage TONY SCHIAVONE~! Is backstage with... MISS JOBS? Jobbs is dressed in some new ring gear, a white sleeveless one piece that ends in booty shorts. Her hair is pulled back and she looks to be all business. SCHIAVONE Tony Schiavone here with none other than Miss Jessica Jobbs. COLE Jessica? COACH You can give her a name, but you can't make a ho a housewife, Cole. JOBBS Thank you, Tony... SCHIAVONE Now, let's just cut right to the chase, Jessica. You shouldn't even been here. You and Jester left a trail of destruction in the life of James Cone for months and last week at ANGLEMANIA VEE-EYE-EYE it ended. Jester is gone for good, never to return to an OAOAST ring. You were part of that deal. And yet... here you are. Asking for air time. JOBBS I'm here because ... Phoenix let me be here. Because I asked to be here. SCHIAVONE Asked Phoenix? What does Jester think about that? JOBBS I wouldn't know, Tony. Jester and I are over. I'm here tonight on a mission. SCHIAVONE What kind of mission? Jobbs takes a step forward, staring into the camera JOBBS Tonight I'm going to wrestle James Cone, one on one. Because I was wrong. Because I was stupid. Because Jesters going nowhere and I deserve better. Phoenix told me that backstage after the match last week. And I thought about... and he's right. So I want his respect. I'm gonna meet him in the ring tonight and try to earn it. If I can... he'll go to bat for me to return as an active competitor. SCHIAVONE That's a huge development. What's going through your head? JOBBS My mind is focused on one thing, Tony. Giving one hundred and fifty percent. Breaking my body tonight to prove that I'm worth being here. Now, if you'll excuse me... I've got to spend some time alone. I gotta get ready. She walks off, leaving a somewhat stunned Schiavone SCHIAVONE Well there it is, kids. We're starting the new wrestling year off with a bang here in the OAOAST. COLE And it's next! -- The drums and guitars of Tonight by Staind kick in, leaving the fans vaguely confused until they realize that a hastily put together video package of Jessica Jobbs' career-so-far is accompanying on the AngleTron. A murmur of boos erupt, with smatterings of “SHOW YUR TIRTS~!” by drunken idiots in the nose bleeds. Jobbs emerges from the back, pausing at the top of the walkway. Her hands are on her hips as she seems to reconsider all of this. In addition to the new one-piece, she's sporting knee-high white boots that lace to the top, with a huge belt and buckle at an angle around her waist. After a second, she nods to herself and begins a determined stride towards the ring. Tonight I'm alive I've watched you all grow up and so have I Inside this isn't really what I've had in mind I no longer relate to this world of hate that's forced upon my plate I tend to disagree, I hope it's not just me alone if only I could make you see BUFFER The following contest is set for ONE FALL, and it is for the contractual renewal of Miss Jobbs to continue competing in the O-A-O-A-S-TEEEEEEEEEE. On her way to the ring, from Detroit, Michigan, weighing in at one hundred and twenty-eight pounds – JESSICA JOBS! Jobbs slides in and backs against the far rope, resting her hands on her knees, watching the entrance way nervously as her music dies down. The orchestral strains of Rebirthing by Skillet ring out before- BOOM~! The stage EXPLODES in FIRE and a hooded Lunar Phoenix walks right through, followed by Widow. They pause at the top of the stage for Phoenix to throw his hood back and throw his fists up as Widow showcases him. There seems to be a moment that passes between him and Jobbs as he raises his eyebrows and cocks his head to the side. You asked for it. Cone and Widow make their way to the ring, pausing briefly for him to rip his BURN BRIGHT hoodie off and throw it out into the crowd. BUFFER Now approaching the ring, from Charleston, South Carolina, weighing in at two-hundred and twenty-seven pounds, the LUNAR PHOENIX, JAAAAMES COOOONE! They hit the ring and he hits the nearest corner from the apron, a la The Rock, sweeping a finger out over the cheering audience. He hops over and down and his music dies down as he adjusts his gear. The ref signals for the bell and -- BOOM! Jobbs comes off the ropes, and nails Phoenix with a big flying lariat before rolling away. Phoenix goes down but immediately rolls up on one knee, glaring at her. His lip is bleeding. COLE Whoa! Jesica Jobbs with a display of power! COACH Respect! Standing at the ready across the ring, Jobbs returns the raised eyebrows and cocks her head. She nods. She'll bring it. COACH Oh, shit! COLE (laughs) And it's on! Phoenix... smiles. He nods. Okay. Let's go. He's up and they circle. Duck in for the lockup, and Phoenix wins, shooting her to the ropes. On the return he's right there to meet her, throwing up a knee. She can't avoid and is sent flipping over, immediately clutching at her ribs on impact. COLE She'll feel that in the morning. COACH But she could feel THIS tonight. But she knows she's got no time. Phoenix grabs a hand full of hair and pulls her up but she throws an elbow to his gut and escapes, leaping back to the ropes for leverage – ANOTHER flying lariat! Phoenix is knocked down but he's coming back up – but she KEPT GOING, RIGHT OFF THE OTHER SIDE – ANOTHER FLYING LARIAT! They both scramble up and she goes for a straight kick to the head – Phoenix BLOCKS, TRAPS HER and HOOKS HER IN for a T-BONE SUPLEX! COLE I dunno, Coach. That T-Bone might change her plans tonight. COACH So could my T-Bone, Cole. So could mine. She's rocked, flopping around for a second in what one can only assume was an attempt at getting right back to her feet. Phoenix licks the inside of his bottom lip, annoyed by being slightly busted open there. He heads for the corner and climbs, taking a second to play to the crowd. Jobbs rolls up, slightly, watching from an awkward position, on her side, propped up with one arm. Phoenix turns and LEAPS FOR THE ELBOW - JOBBS PUSHES OFF, CATCHES HIM - AWKWARD KIND OF A CODEBREAKER!!!!! BOOM! COLE WHOA, shades of Mister Jericho there. Jobbs has been doing some homework! COACH Jimmy wasn't expecting that, Cole. His toast is burnt! Phoenix's head bounces off her knees and he is thrown up and over, his bell pretty rung. Both of them lay there for a moment. Jobbs struggles for the ropes. Phoenix looks up and his nose is bleeding. He's, in a word, pissed. He pulls himself up via the ropes and turns to see that Jobbs has done the same. She watches him warily as he wipes the blood from his face. He nods and motions at her - What are you waiting for? She takes the bait and comes at him but that's just what he wanted. PHOENIX KICK – KRACKOW~! COLE She got all of it! COACH ... no, it's too easy. She takes it right in the jaw, spins around and crumples to the mat. Phoenix lazily drops to his knees and slowly pins her by throwing his right arm over her and then propping himself up with it. 1 2 3! Rebirthing hits and Phoenix is up, holding his face, still selling the codebreaker. The ref raises his hand. He smirks and nods, playing to the crowd as Widow joins the festivities, raising his other hand. After a moment, though, he paces to the corner and asks for a mic. An official tosses him one. The music fades. Phoenix signals Widow to go help a struggling Jobbs get to her feet. Once Jobbs realizes who is helping her, she jerks away warily and rests on the ropes, watching them like a trapped animal. PHOENIX Hey, calm down. If I wanted to hurt you, I'd have done it already. He motions for Widow to join him, and then wipes his face again. The bleeding is starting to subside. PHOENIX You know what you did tonight? Jobbs seems confused, then shakes her head. PHOENIX You reminded me of me. See, this match is somewhere in the mid-card, maybe intended as some kind of cool down match between the big stuff. But you know what my motto is, Jessica? Never let 'em cool down! NEVER. You get interviewed backstage, you talk like you're main event. You STEP FOOT IN THIS RING, and you WRESTLE like you're the MAIN EVENT. You live the main event every second until the main event realizes it needs you. You do your damndest to be the match that everybody's talking about the next day. Live, Jessica, like it's the main event. Tonight was your main event, wasn't it? From your intro to that crazy ass codebreaker, you showed us something new. Like your song said... you're different and tonight was the time. Jobbs nods, and the close up reveals a tear streaking down her face. The crowd begins a chant: “BRING HER BACK! BRING HER BACK! BRING HER BACK!” COLE This San Diego crowd obviously wanting to see more of Jessica Jobbs in the OAOAST. Phoenix smiles and nods. PHOENIX Jessica, I've got a question for you. Somebody throw her a mic, I've got a question for her. A mic flies into the ring. Widow catches it and hands it to Jobbs. PHOENIX Jessica, every great wrestler's gotta have a move with a great name. What are you gonna call that codebreaker? JOBBS What? PHOENIX Come on, don't leave us hanging. JOBBS Uh... well. The Jobber! Phoenix moves in close, almost face to face. PHOENIX Why? JOBBS Because... from here on out, when you get hit with it... You're doin' the JOB! The crowd laughs and cheers! Phoenix grins and nods. PHOENIX Remember that. Welcome back! He grabs her hand and raises it – Tonight by Staind hits. Jobbs seems stunned for a second but begins grinning from ear to ear as Phoenix points to her and plays to the crowd. COLE There it is! Jessica Jobbs has returned to the OAOAST. And with a new attitude! COACH But them same tig bitties! As we fade to commercial, she hugs him. COMMERCIAL Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 COLE Folks, welcome back to HeldDOWN. Recently, Terry Taylor caught up with Krista Isadora Duncan to discuss the fallout from her Anglemania match, as well her relationship with daughter Jade. Let's take a look. We see Krista Isadora Duncan, attired in huge sun glasses, a white polo shirt, and destroyed jeans, and her wrapped in a pink headband similar to axl rose, sitting in the outside dining area at the Sapori Cucina resturant in West Hollywood during a sunny LA morning. With her is her comedic straight man, Terry Taylor. TAYLOR Krista, thanks a bunch for letting us join you here for breakfast... KRISTA You're only here, and not on the ground clutching your face in searing pain, because I used up all my mace on Leonardo DiCaprio at yesterdays NRDC banquet. Saving the rainforest, like the Internet, is serious business, Terry Taylor. Leo says he'll climb a tree and won't come down until the Costa Rican spider monkeys have a guaranteed habitat? No, he won't come down, because if he does I'll knock his skinny ass all the way back to the Seavers' house, and show 'em what growing pains is all about. TAYLOR Yes, well, we have lots to talk about today. First up, is Alix. After her collapse at Anglemania, right here in LA, I think we're all wondering what's her condition, and where is she? KRISTA Alix, is doing pretty well. She's up, she's vocal, she's singing Ashley Tisdale's parts from Highschool Musical, so she's good in that sense. But, um she's gonna be spending some time in drug rehabilitation and counseling. So....yeah. Um, I think we all know that was what she needed more the anything, to be in a nice clean and healthy atmosphere. No being around myopic asskissing goons who just fuel her whole addictions because they think they can make quick couple dollars off her. Or a media that just kind of almost worships this image of a good girl gone bad so they can sell ad space or nail ratings. She needs to be surrounded by people who honestly care about her, and have always cared, and always will care about her. Things had spun so completely out of control for her, for all of us, that this was really the only thing we could possibly do to make things normal again. What's happened to her is so unbelievably tragic, and god awful that it breaks my heart thinking about it. And, I feel a little responsible, like I've always protected her, and I failed, and now I have to scramble to put the pieces back together. And that's my punishment. But, at least we have a chance to turn it around, and make things better. Some people never get that. She's a very sweet girl, she has a big heart, and I love her with all my soul. She means everything to me. And she wanted to go there, that was totally her choice, she knew had to get better, and she wants to get better. So, we'll all be out here waiting and supporting her, because we love. And I guess I'll be slavishly tivoing her favorite shows, like Barefoot Contessa, whatever the hell that is. TAYLOR Jeez Krista, join us in the twenty first century! Barefoot Contessa is a cooking show with Ina Garten, and in her stunning home in the Hamptons she shows people how we can have simple, fun, yet exciting parties with one delicious menu to boot! Get with it, girlfriend! KRISTA I thought the soup kitchen only provided you a warm meal, a bed to sleep on and protection against gang rape, not the basic DirectTV package! Do you actually watch that show? TAYLOR Its probably my favorite show of all time. That and maybe Designing Women. KRISTA When did you first discover you had a vagina? TAYLOR Um, moving on to other matters, your eldest daughter, Jade Rodez will be moving out here to California to live with you. With Alix resting in rehab, Moneymaker out your hair for the moment, are you looking to use these moments of peace to try and bond with Jade? KRISTA Yeah, we're definitely going to try and work to get some great family togetherness. I'm not gonna act like one day here in LA, and all of a sudden its back to the fifties and we're going to be Leave it To Beaver, just with a lesbian mother, and no father, and girls not boys, and crazy, homicidal, sperm hounding, Denise Richards as a neighbor and not the lovable, comedic, possibly sperm hounding Eddie Haskel. But, I think if we give it a genuine honest to god effort we can establish something wonderful and tangible. That'd be my dream. For Jade to come out here and love it, and love me, because I wish her every happiness. And hopefully Maya and Jade will bond, and that'll be such a great thing for them both. Although, I hope they don't bond too well otherwise they might do what my sister Clara and I did to our mother when we were teenagers. Kill her in her sleep. Unfortunately you need garlic and a wooden stake to trully defeat her kind. Lessons for our next valium aided killing spree, I'm sure. Um, but, yeah, I think Jade will have a lot of fun out here. And, hell, who am I kidding? She's from the midwest, she'd have fun sitting in the ball pen in a McDonalds playplace in Flint and drinking lead paint! But, it'll be lots of fun. Oh honey, I'm very excited! TAYLOR I can tell. Instead of your typical breakfast of downers and a martini, you've mashed the downers into dust and sprinkled them onto a glazed donut. KRISTA The breakfast of champions! Those champions of course being the 1996 Dallas Cowboys. But, anywa... Before Krista can launch her next assault on Terry's esteem, a middle aged woman who's brimming over with excitement rushes up to her table. WOMAN Oh my god, wow, oh my god, wow! Oh my god! Oh my god! You're Krista Isadora Duncan! Thee Krista Isadora Duncan! Not the drag impersonator who stripped at my birthday party but the real thing! I was there front and center at your walk of fame ceremony! I camped out front and center for days, just so I could be close to you! And can I just have your autograph, if you don't mind? Without waiting for an answer the woman thrust a tiny sheet of paper onto the table. Curious, Terry leans across the table to watch Krista sign it. KRISTA (handing it to the woman) Pour vous, ma cheri! WOMAN Oh, thank you so much! Terry waits for the woman to depart before he levels an accusation at Krista. TAYLOR Krista, you signed it “Heather Locklear”! KRISTA Oh honey, I don't want to get a reputation that I sign things for fat chicks! TAYLOR I guess that makes sen... KRISTA (looking towards the street) Crap! Paparazzi! Stunning the rooster, Krista rapidly stretches her body across the table and shoves him beneath it. While Terry shrieks and screams at the possibility that he may be blind, Krista smiles for the privacy invading camera men. After a few clicks of their cameras disappear, the men leave Krista to resume her breakfast. Unfortunately, Krista seems to have forgotten she's hidden Terry Taylor beneath the table. Several long seconds eclipse before the disheveled announcer hauls himself from beneath the table. TAYLOR What the sam hill did you do that for? KRISTA Oh honey, I don't want to get a reputation that I hang out with fat chicks! Its bad enough there's footage of me fooling around with Rosie O'Donnell on the set of a League Of Their Own, I don't need you dragging me into a tub of bacon grease, tons of fun. TAYLOR Its actually creamed corn in my erotic fantasies journal. But, back, to Jade, I suppose. Do you think that maybe, you might try and mentor her as well as foster a relationship? KRISTA Oh honey, that's all part of being a mother, Terry. You might have known that if your mother hadn't left you in the care of King Louie, and Baloo. TAYLOR I am not Mowgli from the Jungle Book! KRISTA Uh-huh, sure, but at least you have the frame of reference to know why it is that you're being insulted. Jade, unfortunately, hasn't been exposed to much um...culture in Grand Rapids. So, I'll definitely try to give her some artistic knowledge as well. Her favorite film of all time is American Pie! Over a hundred years of world cinema in some form and she picks the flick that brought the word MILF into American vernacular. Hey, why, am I complaining, if weren't for that movie, I'd be a thirty year old hag who needs to dress her age and not a smoking hawt MILF! TAYLOR Thirty? Um, regardless, I just want you to know, if you need a babysitter for Jade, then well.. KRISTA She's eighteen, Terry. TAYLOR But, I'm here, because sometimes a young girl, nubile, fresh, innocent to the world, needs the tender touch of a ruggedly handsome, sauve, well hun... KRISTA Terry, I may have used all my pepper spray to shove Leo off the Titanic, but I can certainly jam this fork into your esophagus faster then you can say “Gee Whizzles officer, I had no idea the parking lot you just caught me masturbating in was five feet away from a church playground!” TAYLOR I would never do it in a parking lot, Krista. Because I saw on Discovery Science once, that the chemicals from asphalt ,especially freshly laid, can sort of seep off the ground on hotter days and negatively effect your sperm count should you leave that part of your anatomy exposed for a prolonged period of time. Although, I typically don't go “down there” without proper protection, I take things on a case by case basis, and its nice to know that when I don't wear the jimmy hat, I'm giving one hundred percent of Terry Taylor. Sometimes the girl demands a little extra when you don't wear one, but, like I said its a case by case basis. Usually the extra charge is only for rear entry, but you have to ask and make sure, otherwise they'll try and cheat you. They're crafty that way. KRISTA (to the table next to her) Can I borrow your stake knife, honey? I'm just gonna slit my throat really quick, it'll only take a couple seconds. (Krista fastens her napkin under her neck like a bib) On the unfortunate chance that I do live, I'd at least like to avoid a hellish dry cleaning bill! TAYLOR Yes, um, well, thanks, again, Krista, anything else you'd like to add? KRISTA XYT, honey. TAYLOR Huh? KRISTA Like x-y-z, only with a t, like examine your zipper only with your toupee that looks like the fourth chipmunk brother. So, do you get that thing a rabies shot or have you developed an immunity? As Terry struggles to adjust his toupee, we fade out. COLE Folks, coming up in just a bit, Krista's daughter Jade, teams with women's champion Maggie Nerdly to face Mackenzie and Maggie's sister Molly. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted April 5, 2008 (edited) COLE Up next, the ladies of the OAOAST will be in action. Mackenzie DeCenzo, who we saw last week brutally put a beating to Jade Rodez, demanded a rematch in a 'seething rage' after AngleMania VII where she was paid back in kind by Jade. However, not a one on one match this week, as the Women's Champion and our broadcast colleague Maggie Nerdly will see action, as will her sister Molly! COACH First of all, I've never heard Maggie call you her 'colleague'. And I boldly predict we never will. Second, I don't blame Mackenzie one bit. She was humilated in front of thousands of people in her hometown, her friends, her family... COLE Her maids. COACH ...her butlers, everybody! It was supposed to be the finest night of her refined life and thanks to Krista and her demon offspring it turned into a wretched nightmare! Well if Jade thought the beating Mackie dished out last week was something, wait till you see what's gonna happen tonight. Once it's over, Jade's gonna be so beat up, her own mother wouldn't recognised her. Oh... wait, nevermind! HAHAHA! COLE You're a sick sick man and sadly I doubt that's the last time I'll be saying that during the course of this one. Let's send it up to the ring. Walking arm in arm down the red carpet, the women of The Enterprise are bathed in the light of flashbulbs from the numerous photographers around them. Under her left arm, Molly carries the Siclopse to the ring, muttering to herself criticisms of the clichéd photographic methods being used around her. In her khaki pants and powder blue polo shirt, Molly looks noticeably under-dressed compared to her tag team partner. Beside her Mackenzie wears a typically empowering looking business suit to the ring, but shows some consideration to the fact she's going to be competing tonight by swapping the skirt for a very formal pair of short pants, clearly tailored from an expensive suit themselves. I would say she means business, but such shameless puns are below me. The duo get past the cameras and Molly sets up The Siclopse in position outside the ring, while Mackenzie tells Michael Buffer something in no uncertain terms. BUFFER The following tag team contest is set for one fall. On the way to the ring, they represent THE ENTERPRISE! First, fighting out of the Tisch School of Arts at New York University... she is the 2005 and 2006 Canadian documentary filmmaker of the year... MMMOOOOOOLLLLYYYYYY... NNEEEEEERRRDDLLLLYYYYYYY!! And her tag team partner. From Los Angeles, California... "definately NOT San Diego"... but Los Angeles, California... she is the Chief Financial Officer of The Enterprise and a former OAOAST 24/7 Champion... (World = much lolz!) BUFFER ...she is MAAACCKKEEEENNZZIIIIEEEEEEEE... DDEEEE-CCEEEEEENNZZZZZZOOOOOOO!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Mackenzie makes the mistake of posing after her name is called, earning her a louder chorus of boos than even usual. Siclopse all set up, Molly joins her in the ring and together The Enterprise women make a big show of 'warming up' for their match as if they do so every week. COLE Molly Nerdly, the unpaid intern of The Enterprise and I guess her clothing budget speaks volumes for that fact. COACH I'll have you know that's the clothing ensemble of choice for all budding film students. Why? Because Molly wears it and she's the queen of all at Tits School Of Arts! COLE Uh... that would be 'Tisch'. COACH That's what I said. Besides, who are you to question anybody's clothing choice, Queer Eye? Already looking pretty bitter, Mackenzie's mood drops even deeper into the gutter as "Date With The Night" by the Yeah Yeah Yeah's hits. The San Diego crowd erupt with Yeah Yeah Yeahs of their own for Jade Rodez as she marches out, eyes scowling and locked on Mackenzie from the entrance way. BUFFER And the opponents. First, from Grand Rapids, Michigan... JJJAAAAAAAADDEEEEE... RRROOOOOOODDEEEEEEZZZZZ!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Now, you wanna talk about clothing, why does Jade choose to do her laundry right before every HeldDOWN~! and realise the only clothes she's got left is that tracksuit? Answer me that. You'd think considering her mommy changes her entire wardrobe every week, she'd be able to pass on some old hand-me-downs. Or is even that too much for Neglectant Mother Of The Year Krista Isadora Duncan? Jade marches down the aisle but stops short of actually getting in the ring at a two on one dis-advantage. Green and gold lights suddenly begin to flash at the sight of the entry way, while pillars of smoke spring forth from around the chaotic illumination. "Crushcrushcrush" by Paramore begins to play as Maggie Nerdly skips out from the back and flashes the famous Nerdly RAWK~! Hand signal to the adoring crowd, before showing off the Women's Championship around her waist. As she makes her way down the ramp she slaps hands with the eager fans and slaps Jade on the back, kinda mis-judging her serious mood as she flashes her some RAWK~! BUFFER And her tag team partner. From Edmonton, Alberta Canada... she is the 'bitchin' host of the Afterparty on OAOAST.com and the reigning OAOAST Women's Champion... a member of the fighting Nerdly family, MMMAAAAAAAGGIIIIIIEEEEEEE... NNEEEEEERRRDDLLLLYYYYYYY!!! "YYYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!" COLE Did Michael Buffer really just say "bitchin'"? COACH Sure. Crazy cracka says it all the time. Entering the ring, Maggie stands in the centre and points her bouquet of flowers to each individual turnbuckle. As her floral arrangement is directed to each corner, a tower of green pyro explodes from it's top turnbuckle, watched unimpressed by Molly and Mackenzie on the outside. Once that's complete, Maggie tosses her bouquet behind her back and into the audience, replacing it in her hands with the Women's Championship which shows throws up over her head, along with another handful of RAWK~! COLE Maggie Nerdly, Women's Champion! And of course, the current girlfriend of Leon Rodez, who just happens to be her tag team partner's broth... uh, uncle. Sorry, force of habit. The OAOAST is one crazy family tree nowadays Coach. The Women's Title is passed to the timekeeper's table and we're ready to go as Jade makes it clear she's going to start for her team. No problem with that, Maggie kicks it out on the apron. Mackenzie and Molly have a little more conversation on their side before deciding on who'll start for them, Mackenzie pulling rank to get her hands on Jade. *DINGDINGDING!* As she enters the ring, Mackie's mouth starts running immediately as she proceeds to call poor Jade every name under the sun. Jade just looks on with a scowl, until finally she's taken enough and thumps Mackenzie across the jaw with an elbow smash! Another! And another! And yet another! Mackenzie reaches out and grabs Jade's hair to stop her strikes. But Jade grabs her own handfuls of hair and the two women tussle around for a bit in a mini cat-fight, before releasing each other with a shove. For a second they both rub their heads in pain, before going right back at each other. Jade telegraphs her lunge though and Mackenzie ducks underneath her out-stretched arms, kneeing Jade in the kidneys to drop her. "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" COACH That's smarts. I think Mackie proved last week she's pretty capable when it comes to stepping into the ring. Jade's still at the 'playground scrap' level and with someone as smart as Mackenzie it's just not going to work. Grabbing a handful of hair again, Mackie insults Jade some more before throwing her face-first down into the mat. Jade pushes back up, so Mackie throws her right back down again, ignoring the warnings about hairpulls from the referee. "MA - CKEN - ZIE SUCKS!" "MA - CKEN - ZIE SUCKS!" "MA - CKEN - ZIE SUCKS!" "MA - CKEN - ZIE SUCKS!" Angered at the chants Mackenzie screams out loud that she infact doesn't suck, which may well be true but let's not go there. With the illegitimate Duncan daughter on her knees in front of her, Mackie yanks Jade's head backwards into some hard right hands. She then drags Jade to her feet and leans her back, across an outstretched knee. With a hand across the jaw and one on the leg she then bends Jade into a backbreaker and pushes down to screams of pain. COLE Mackenzie just trying to make an example out of Jade right here. As much as she's enjoying hurting Jade like this, I'm sure part of her is wishing this was Krista as well. COACH Hey, it's the next best thing, her little secret daughter. Win-win. Maggie's reaction of "woah, harsh!" from the apron doesn't do much to help her tag team partner as she's bent in ways the body shouldn't be bent. Jade refuses to give in just yet though. "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" "LET'S GO JADE!" Before she can draw on the support of the San Diego crowd, Jade takes a shot to her exposed midsection. And another. Mackenzie then pushes down again looking for the submission, or just to torture Jade some more, who knows. Seeing enough, Maggie finally enters the ring to try and help out. Unfortunately, Mackie quickly warns the referee and he cuts Maggie off, allowing Molly to sneak into the ring. Up to the middle rope she goes as Mackenzie turns herself back to her own corner. Molly seems a little unsure on the ropes at first, but gets her footing and drops a big elbow to the chest of Jade, dumping her off of Mackenzie's knee! COLE Jade Rodez just got demolished! Out ducks Molly, as Mackenzie makes the cover... 1... 2... NO! COLE A lot of fight in that young woman however. It's in her genes, after all. Mackenzie drags Jade to her feet, shoving her into the Enterprise corner and making the tag to Molly. Out of the ring steps Mackie legally, but not so legal is the handful of the tracksuit pants she holds onto to keep Jade stuck in the corner. Molly meanwhile backs across the ring and comes charging, crushing Jade in the corner with her Box-office Bust!! Let go, Jade slumps to the canvas again as Molly rolls up the sleeves on her polo shirt to show she means business. COLE Even in a match she's participating in, Mackenzie can't help but lend a hand from the outside. COACH She's a very pro-active woman. She ain't one of those raise the kids, wash the dishes, make the samm'iches kinda bitches, she's an indipendent woman, a fine sister doin' it for herself. You have to respect that. Pulled to her feet, Jade is whipped off the ropes by Molly who then telegraphs a back elbow. Badly. Underneath goes Jade, Molly thinking quickly and looking to cut her off with a clothesline. Again Jade is able to duck underneath though and comes back off the ropes with a desperation crossbody... COLE Could have her! 1... 2... Kickout! Realising she needs to make a tag, Jade rushes for her corner... ...and gets SPEARED down by Molly! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Jade goes down holding her ribs, Molly earning warm applause from the outside from Mackenzie before being ordered to stay on her opponent. Quickly, the unpaid intern pulls Jade back to her feet and scoops her up, carrying her into the centre of the ring and dropping her with a side slam. COLE Nice execution from Molly. I have to say, I'm quite surprised with Molly thus far, we haven't had any indication that she's much of a professional wrestler up until now but she's holding her own okay. COACH What are you talking about? She's already 1-0 this year! COLE What? COACH She beat Rescue 911, remember! COLE Oh! You mean when Alix Maria Spezia did all the work and Molly just stood there dumbly wondering what it takes to become a paid intern? COACH That's not how I remember it. Tag is made, bringing Mackenzie DeCenzo back into the match. Able to take her sweet time about following up Mackenzie takes a moment to mock the fans for getting behind Jade, reminding them that she's the one flat on her back crying in pain. The San Diego natives don't seem to care though and continue to show their support. Mackie pulls Jade back to her feet and hangs her over the turnbuckles facing out into her supporters. Taking a step back, Mackenzie then plows forward and drives her shoulder into Jade's lower back! COACH That's called the Tramp Stamp, Michael. Very appropriate for our women's division. Flicking her hair back, Mackie smiles an evil smile as he measures Jade up again. After a few words exchanging with Maggie, Mackenzie then charges in again... AND RUNS HERSELF SHOULDER-FIRST INTO THE RINGPOST!!! "YYYYYEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH COLE JADE GOT OUT OF THE WAY! Molly looks on horrified as Mackenzie's arm wraps around the steel post with a thud, already working out in her head how to cut around that footage later. Falling out of the corner Mackie clutches her shoulder and now it's a race to the corner, as both Mackie and Jade look to get the tag to their Nerdly sister of choice. Molly routes Mackenzie on, Maggie still chillin' like an ill'un on the outside but ready for the tag all the same. "MA - GGIE!" "MA - GGIE!" "MA - GGIE!" "MA - GGIE!" Maggie gets behind Maggie by getting a "Maggie" chant going. COLE Could we be about to see the Nerdly sisters going at it? Still holding onto her lower back with one hand, Jade's crawl is slow and painful. Mackenzie still nurses her shoulder but is over to her corner first, getting the tag to Molly. But the film student takes a second too long getting in the ring and she JUST misses Jade before she GETS THE TAG! COLE YES! We are, as here comes Maggie! After so many catty remarks in the past Molly now tries to reason with her sister, but to no avail. Maggie drops her with a double leg takedown and bounces the back of Molly's head repeatedly off the canvas, doing a complete 360 of the ring before finally letting Molly go in order to pull her back up. Irish whip by Maggie, leaping up to catch Molly with a spinning heel kick on the way back. Maggie then takes a quick detour, dropkicking Mackenzie as she tries to get back into the ring to help her Enterprise associate out. Jumping back to her feet, the perky announcer lets out a quick rendition of "Never Gonna Give You Up", before RICK ROLL'ING Molly!! Hook of the leg... 1... 2... Kickout! The Women's Champion waits for Molly to get back up, leaping up and catching her with a hurricanrana, reaching back and cradling a leg... 1... 2... SAVE BY MACKENZIE! But as soon as Mackenzie goes after Maggie again, into shot rushes Jade Rodez to CLUB Mackenzie down with a big Clothesline!! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" Back out of the ring rolls, Jade stopped from going out after her by a sudden twinge in her back. Meanwhile, Maggie stays on her sister, scooping her up and slamming her. Off the ropes, Maggie again looks for the Rick Roll. But the element of surprise has gone this time and Molly isn't falling for it again, rolling out of the way! Maggie's body bounces awkwardly off the canvas and she pulls herself up, met by Molly with a diving clothesline. Molly then leaves Maggie behind for a second and runs at Jade... who just spots her out of the corner of her eye, sidestepping and sending Molly running chest first into the turnbuckles. As she turns around, Molly's ample assets are then crushed by a double knee strike in the corner by Rodez! COLE Shades of her uncle! Down goes Jade after that with her back still in agony. Luckily, Maggie is there to take over for her, running at Molly... and stopping short of her sister as she flinches expecting to be crushed again... "AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!" ...but instead Maggie screams RIGHT IN HER EAR!!! COACH OW! COLE Hey, remember that time we both went to that N*SYNC concert together? COACH I do now... unfortunately. COLE Yeah. Good times. How's your throat now by the way? COACH Oh much better, thanks for asking. Dis-orientated by the ringing in her ears, Molly staggers out of the corner and a boot sets her up for Happiness Is Edmonton In Your Rearview Mirror... but again Mackenzie appears and with a handful of hair she drags the Women's Champion off of her sister, spins her around and throws her ruthlessly out of the ring! Maggie splats off the ringside mats hard. COACH Being Women's Champ isn't all it's cracked up to be, huh Mags? Jade goes back on the offence, attacking Mackenzie with forearms from behind. But Molly catches her with an axehandle to the back to cut her off before her headache haunts her again. No compassion for that, Mackenzie tells Molly to help her with an irish whip. Together the Enterprise women send Jade off the ropes and duck their heads for backbody drops. Jade manages to put on the brakes, kicking Mackenzie in the chest before grabbing Molly by her khaki pants and throwing her to the outside right out with her sister. JADE OVER! "YYYEEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHH!" COACH Ugh, how cliché. Where's that DNA test when you need it? Lining Mackenzie up, Jade aims at her face with the GAMENGIRI... ...NO! Mackenzie blocks it, causing Jade to land awkwardly on her side! She shouts out in pain and grabs her lower back again, perhaps having wrenched a muscle on landing. Mackenzie gives her no time to worry about that though, locking her into a front facelock. Cradling the leg, Mackenzie then lifts Jade up and hovers with her for a second... before driving her down into the canvas with the Fisherman's Buster for the second time in two weeks! COLE And that's gonna do it, again. Cover by Mackenzie... 1... 2... 3!!! *DINGDINGDING!* Just pulling herself up on the outside too late, Maggie hangs her head sadly as she realises she's too late to save her friend. Mackenzie pushes up onto her knees and points a finger into the emotionless face of Rodez, letting off a little extra steam before she SLAPS the defenceless girl across the face. Maggie dives in now and chasing Mackenzie off, big grin on her face as she swaggers away on the floor. BUFFER Ladies and gentlemen, your winners of the match... the team of MOLLY NERDLY and MACKENZIE DECENZO... THE ENTERPRISE!!!! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COACH Seriously, is this Jade thing some giant rib that nobody's let The Coach in on yet? You're telling me that's the daughter of Krista Isadora Duncan? Either we all bein' played, or we know the real reason Krista didn't want nothing to do with her. Jade's gotten herself beat two weeks in a row now... Krista hasn't lost a match since the Carter Administration! Let alone two in two weeks! That's poor. Real poor. Maggie kneels down to check on Jade while Mackenzie waits for Molly to limp over to her and join in the celebrations. The Enterprise women raise their arms victoriously at the foot of the ramp, Mackenzie smiling at the state she's left Jade Rodez in before looking back at Maggie and warning her that she and her Women's Championship might well be next! COLE The Enterprise males got the job done at AngleMania. And tonight, it's the Enterprise's females who prove their dominance. We'll see you next week, for a more eventful HeldDOWN, where we kick off our tournament to determine who will gain the right to compete for the world championship at School's Out! FADE OUT Edited April 5, 2008 by Patty O'Green Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
