Patty O'Green 0 Report post Posted May 3, 2008 With Natasha Bedingfield's Pocketful of Sunshine serenading us we fly over Milan's Brera district a an artistic haven with wonderful private private galleries in Via Brera, Via del Carmine and Via Solferino, as well as ideal shopping destinations. We return to the arena with Los Diablos whimsical entrance video, a zany parody of the James Bond films, playing across the cathedral balcony. It's raining men - Hallelujah It's raining men - Amen It's raining men - Hallelujah It's raining men - Amen The male version of COD, minus all the success, prance onto the pink and yellow lit stage bumping and grinding against each other before skipping down the aisle hand and hand. BUFFER The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, accompanied by MARIACHI… from sunny Cabo San Lucas, one half of the sexist team in AAAAALL of México… MORACCA! "YYEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!" COACH Aw, man. I wish the rumor INS picked up these guys was true. COLE It was. Luckily for them -- and OAOAST officials -- tonight’s event is being held in Milan, Italy, though I’m sure it won’t be long before Los Diablos de Fuego will be allowed back on U.S. soil. COACH Yeah, all they’ll have to do is cross the border. Again. Los Diablos sandwich Michael Buffer in a humorous/disturbing moment. Then an unfamiliar piece of music begins playing. My dick cost a late-night fee Your dick got the HIV My dick plays on the double feature screen Your dick went straight to DVD My dick: bigger than a bridge Your dick look like a little kid's My dick: large like the Chargers, the whole team Your shit look like you're 14 Out from the back emerges former Lone Star Gunslinger Jock Mulligan in white short shorts/chaps with red heart emblazoned on crotch and sort of a see through backside with the word “DICK” written across. BUFFER And, ladies and gentlemen, his opponent… from San Antonio, Texas, weighing 232 pounds… “MR. DICK” JOCK MULLIGAN! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" COLE Quite a fashion statement being made by Jock Mulligan. COACH Ahem. Mr. Dick. * DINGDINGDING * The flaming luchador can’t keep his eyes off Jock, absolutely mesmerized by his wild attire. Flattered by the attention Jock takes Moracca’s hand and rubs it all over his chest. * awaked hush, scattered boos * MORACCA Suddenly, Jock pulls Moracca in close and delivers an INVERTED ATOMIC DROP… MORACCA …followed by a CLOTHESLINE FROM LINE!! COACH I don’t know what Mr. Dick calls that, but it’s definitely a shock to the cock. Hey! The Cock Shock. The cover. ONE… TWO… NO! Mr. Dick isn’t through yet. He whips Moracca into the ropes and connects with a beautifully executed standing dropkick. Rather than go for the pin Jock snaps Moracca over and drops the big leg. Talking smack to Moracca he makes the cover. ONE… TWO… NO! For a second time Mr. Dick breaks his own cover and receives an earful from referee Earl Hebner. Jock “accidentally” thumbs Moracca as he scoops him across his shoulders…AND THEN SLAMS HIM DOWN ON BOTH KNEES!!! COLE Oh, a devastating double knee gutbuster. Third time’s the charm? ONE… TWO… THREE!!! * DINGDINGDING * BUFFER Here is your winner… “MR. DICK” JOCK MULLIGAN! "BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" In a sign of good sportsmanship, Jock helps Moracca to his feet and shakes his hand…only to floor him with a forearm smash flush to the face! COLE Hey, come on. That’s uncalled for. COACH You can say that again. I can’t believe Moracca would try to cheap shot Mr. Dick after shaking his hand. What poor sportsmanship on his part. Mariachi steps in, but he too is knocked on his ass courtesy of a forearm. Mr. Dick then grabs both legs and gives Mariachi a HEADBUTT TO THE GROIN!! COLE Jock Mulligan just being a dick now. He’s already won the damn match. A big shit-eating grin on his face, Jock exits peacefully after that violent display. COACH Impressive win for Mr. Dick, wouldn't you say? COLE I may not like him anymore, but I certainly respect his in ring ability. Hopefully that we'll be the last of Mister Mulligan tonight! Folks, this TSM Spectacular will return in a few moments! LATER LIFE IN THE FAB LANE MOLLY NERDLY AND THE SICLOPSE TAKE US INSIDE THE HOME OF KRISTA ISADORA DUNCAN Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
